Barbed Wire Massacre: Sabu vs. Terry Funk
Sabu is busted up quick in this match. Funk soon follows however, and before long both are bloody messes. Funk whips Sabu into the wire, which clings to the skin of Sabu. Funk pulls Sabu off the wire, and hoists him up over his head. He goes to drop Sabu gut-first across the top of the wire, but Sabu turns right around, landing on his feet on the floor. He scoops up a barb-wire chair, and throws it at Funk, smacking him right in the face! Funk falls backwards, the chair clinging to his face for a second before dropping. Sabu grabs a normal chair from under the ring, and throws it over the ropes. He hops up onto the apron, using gaps between the barbs of the ropes. He tests how tight the wire is, smiles, and drops back to the floor, before sliding under the wire. He sets up the chair, before laying the barb-wire one down on the floor. He places Funk face down on the wire. He turns his back, preparing for the jump ahead. Behind him, Funk rises to his feet with the barbed wire chair in hand. Sabu runs, jumps off the chair, onto the wire. He balances, and twists as he jumps. He flies forwards, right into a face full of barb-wire chair! Sabu drops, and as he falls, his skin hangs horrifically from the wire wrapped round the chair. Funk grabs Sabu, lifts him up, and piledrives him right onto the barb-wire chair! Funk covers Sabu and gets the three!
Winner: Terry Funk
Break
No Disqualifications: Bam Bam Bigelow w/ Shane McMahon vs. Judas Mesias w/ James Mitchell
No part of the match resembles wrestling, as these two big guys slug it out. Bigelow gets the better part of the early match, but then loses control when he misses a big clothesline and tumbles over the top rope. Mesias grabs him and shoves him back under the ropes. Mesias doesn’t let Bigelow back to his feet, punishing him with stomps and kicks. Eventually, Bigelow fights him off and pulls himself up in the corner. He grabs Mesias and throws him back into the corner. He runs up, and splashes him in the corner! Mesias crumples to the floor. Bigelow drabs him into position, and climbs to the top rope! The crowd cheers in anticipation of the Bigelowsault. Suddenly, Mesias rolls backwards and stands. Shane yells to Bigelow. As it turns out, that was the worst possible decision he could have made, and could well be the last one he does make! Bigelow tries to stop himself, screws up and drops down onto his back on the canvas. Mesias drags him backwards, and grabs Bigelow’s legs. He turns him with difficulty, and latches in the La Patriota! Shane O’Mac scrambles into the ring, but Mesias lets go of the hold, grabs McMahon and spinebusters him right into the mat! He turns, and locks in the La Patriota again. Suddenly, Mitchell slips into the ring, and smashes his cane over the head of Mesias! Bigelow struggles to his feet, grabs Mesias, and hits him with Greetings from Asbury Park! Bigelow makes the cover, and gets the one two three!
Winner: Bam Bam Bigelow
New LWF General Manager: Shane McMahon
Mitchell laughs crazily, as he walks from the arena. The entire building is stunned – why did he screw his own guy, and lose himself a job?
Break
LWF Championship Match: RVD vs. Randy Orton vs. Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka
The match is fast paced. Orton seems to be targeting Snuka, keeping with his Legend Killer persona. As we join the match, RVD is down from a DDT, and Snuka is ascending to the top rope. Suddenly, Orton jumps up onto the apron, and knocks Snuka flying into the ring. Snuka lands badly, coming down on the back of his head. Orton is straight into the ring, and he’s looking to set up for the RKO. Snuka rises shakily, and Orton jumps up as he turns. Snuka somehow finds the where-with-all to push Orton forwards – right into a kick to the jaw from RVD! Van Dam delivers a swift boot to the gut of Snuka, and tosses him between the ropes and out of the ring. He springs up to the top rope, and delivers the Five Star Frog Splash! He covers Orton, and gets the 1-2-3!
Winner and NEW Lightning Wrestling Federation Champion: Rob Van Dam
RVD celebrates with the belt. As he leaves the arena, Orton pulls himself to his feet. He looks enraged – and he jumps out of the ring. He grabs Snuka, and delivers a sick RKO on the floor! He turns Snuka over, and runs up, delivering the sick punt! Snuka’s eyes are glazed over. Orton has a freaky, sadistic look on his face as the show’s lights go down…
