TheOneBigWill's 'take' on Monday Night Raw: June 30th, 2008:
Opening Segment: Jim Ross is welcomed to Monday Night Raw, as he makes his farewell address. He said that hes loved being on Raw and has had some very rememberable moments. Hes also said hes had some awful moments at the hands of Mr. McMahon, but hes not the type to throw salt on a wound. (yet he still mentioned it?) He claimed McMahon could be a Texas Longhorns fan.
Jim Ross thanks Jerry Lawler, and claims Lawler was a world class friend, co-worker, partner, and he was even like an older brother. Ross has the biggest "uncomfortable" moment on Raw, when he expresses his undying passion for the King in true Goldust fashion, minus the rubbing of the chest.
J.R. continues to run on and on about Oklahoma and how hes had some very memorable moments from there on Raw, and he hopes to do the same on Smackdown. The crowd boos J.R. like crazy for mentioning his draft to Smackdown. He addresses the fans in hoping they'll give Smackdown a chance, and Michael Cole as well. Of course that didn't go over well, as Cole was booed out of the building. As Ross continued to go on and on, he was shockingly interrupted by Edge.
Edge said the reason he was there, was because when he heard about Jim Ross giving a farewell speech, he just had to be there. He said J.R.'s arrogance never ceased to amaze him. Edge completely goes off on Jim Ross asking why he feels the people in Oklahoma give a crap about him. He yells Hook'em Horns, as well as telling Jim Ross to put that in his blog, and calls him a BBQ Boy. (The intensity is outrageous) Edge lightens up saying that it won't be completely bad however, as now J.R. can continue his Hall of Fame career.. but instead of cheering "Stone Cold" he can cheer "Edge wins!"
This prompts Edge to demand that Hawkins and Ryder remove him from the building. As they escort Ross out of the ring to the back, Edge explains that hes actually not just on Raw to see Jim Ross, but to also address a couple things for Raw.
Like the fact that they have no General Manager. Unlike Smackdown, who has the love of his life, Vickie Guerrero. Like how they don't have the Undertaker. Then quickly explains noone in the W.W.E. has Taker, cause Edge ended his career. He then says they also don't have a World Champion.. and that they needed to take a picture, because this was the last time they would see one on Raw. Edge leaves up the ramp.
As it seems all but over, and headed for commercial we suddenly get Batista's music erupting over the speakers. Edge turns around to see a very pissed off Animal staring him down. As Edge attempts running for his life, Batista catches him and pummels him within an inch of his very life. Beating Edge up in violent fashion, without any concern, care or well being for the World Champion. Batista did the only thing he knew how to do, and that was attack a defenseless man.. from behind.. who could've been injured from the night before. (Could've been)
Batista destroys Edge with several power/impact moves, ramming his back into the ring apron, then guardrail. Tossing him hard into the steel steps, then finally taking him into the ring where he proceeded to once again attack Edge from what looked to be from behind, as he ends the violent (no good reason) attack on Edge with a Batista Bomb, leaving him lifeless and completely destroyed in the middle of the ring.
The Matches:
1. World Heavyweight Championship Match: Edge (c.) v. C.M. Punk: Punk spent all weekend watching Edge videos to get a clue on exactly how to use his Money in the Bank case, and unfortunately for Edge fans the little Punk bastard didn't fail. Punk gave his best Edge impression as he cashed in his MITB case, lifted a lifeless Edge, connected with the G.T.S. and stole the World Heavyweight Championship!
2. Mickie James v. Jillian Hall: Overall a squash by Mickie James, with Jillian getting a couple moves in on the injured shoulder that Katie Lea Burchill worked over from the night prior. The match came to an end when Jillian caught Mickie's knees, then got caught again by the Mick-Kick.
3. Ted Dibiase & Cody Rhodes v. Darren Wayne & Steve Anthony: Once again, this match was more Cody Rhodes than Ted Dibiase. I'm curious why they're afraid to let him wrestle. Cody more or less showed some heel tactics, as he ended the match with a more violent looking D.D.T. (I'm gonna start calling it the Cody T) Ted Dibiase only got in a form of his Father's signature fist drop, before tagging Cody back in to pick up the victory.
After the match, a promo was cut in which Cody Rhodes said that he tried doing what his Father raised him to do, and that was be patient. But Cody said he was anything but patient, and he got tired of carrying Hardcore Holly so he had to drop him. Cody then uses the best one liner of the night in saying "When you're as talented as I am.. you take what you want." I lost it.
Dibiase got on the mic and more or less said that unlike the rest of their Generation, they're taking advantage of their position. Dibiase goes on to explain that Cody and He took matters into their own hands, because they were Priceless.
4. Intercontinental Championship: Kofi Kingston (c.) v. Chris Jericho (w/ Lance Cade): Once again, in almost similar fashion to last night the match was straight down the middle with talent. Neither man getting a clear cut advantage, with the exception of one guy hitting a coupe signature moves here, and then the other hitting some later.
The ending was downright stupid, as the official Disqualifies Chris Jericho for hooking the tights of Kofi Kingston. I think this would go down in history as the first time a Wrestler has ever been completely disqualified for hooking the tights, instead of just told to release them. I hardly see how it warranted a DQ, but obviously Jericho wasn't meant to win his Championship back.
After the match Jericho tried helping Kofi be more like Shawn Michaels, as Jericho went for Kofi's eye, trying to cut and rake at it.
Promos/Segments:
Shane McMahon: Shane McMahon technically started the show with an opening segment in which he said that his Father was a great person, and in respecting his Father's wishes to keep their health issues private he would do just that. He said that he hoped and wanted everyone within the W.W.E. to continue doing what they do, and don't stop because of Mr. McMahon because Mr. McMahon wouldn't want that.
Rey Mysterio/Santino Marella: Mysterio (still very apparent he isn't happy about being on Raw) expresses his congrats to Punk (bastard) and explains that his whole career has been on Smackdown. He got heavily booed for that. Raw fans really don't like people mentioning rival brands.
Mysterio said its a good thing though and that hes excited. (I love how the most he could remotely stumble out of his mouth was that he was really excited to be drafted to Raw.. I can just feel the excitement, Rey)
Santino interrupts him and explains that he wants to welcome Mysterio to Raw. Santino then explains he doesn't understand the big deal, because anyone who hides behind a mask is either ugly, stupid.. or BATMAN! Santino cuts Rey off, telling him to shut'a his face up. He then brings up the new cover of W.W.E. Magazine with Rey on it.. and explains that Rey must of been thinking "Look at me, look at me, I'm taller than Horn'a'swoggle. I like cookies? Booyaka, Booyaka!
Santino then shows the photo the magazine didn't use, as he continues to explain to Rey that Raw is where true stars (such as himself) rise and become something. Santino said if Mysterio doesn't watch himself, it could end up very bad for him. After all is said and done, Santino said he'll allow Rey to say what he has to say. Mysterio decides to attack Santino, dropping him on the ropes and connects with a 619.
C.M. Punk/J.B.L.: Punk is in the back, experiencing what its like to be a winner for the first time this year, as he stumbled his way through an interview thanking random people.. including Batista. (conspiracy at its finest, I think) J.B.L. walks up, unimpressed and asks if Punk is joking about being Champion.
J.B.L. explains what the world was likely thinking, in which Punk is proud of being a paper Champion, and loving becoming a Champion in a way that is so unfitting on winning a Championship. J.B.L. says Punk can do one of two things. The first is, he could go to his hotel tonight and remember that he'll always be a paper Champion, an asterisk in the history book.. or he can defend the Championship against someone who wasn't already beaten down. Punk accepts.
John Cena/J.B.L.: Cena comes to the ring almost directly after this and explains how his match with Triple H. would be remembered as a great moment, a classic moment. He said he won't make any excuses and he lost, but regardless it'll go down in history. He then connects the dots and explains that it'll go into the history books just like Punk's title victory tonight.
He gives congrats to Punk for using his brain and winning the Championship in a smart manner. (yet when Edge defeated Cena in roughly the same way, although without as much cheating, it was considered "cheap."
) Cena then says J.B.L. took advantage of the situation, and he felt Punk would've accepted anyone's challenge.. so since Punk is the Champion, and there isn't a GM on Raw. He feels Punk should decide who he wants to defend the title against.
J.B.L. comes out, with his own group of security guards and explains that since there isn't a GM, and since McMahon is gone, J.B.L. is running things. He says that he can't afford to risk Cena ruining his chance to become Champion, so hes brought his own group of security to escort Cena out of the building. After a short scuffle, Cena is promptly escorted out of the building.
Katie Lea & Paul Burchill/Jamie Noble/Kane: Katie Lea is in the back telling her Brother Paul that she had the Championship won, and knows if she can get a rematch she'll definately win the title. Paul agrees and tells Katie to stay out of trouble while he goes to see about getting her that match. As Paul leaves, Noble comes up to Katie.
Noble tries smooth talking Katie like he did with the ladies on Smackdown, as he explains that since hes new to Raw the best way for him to get respect, is to go up to the biggest guy in the locker room and take it. Katie notices a Superstar in the distance and says heres his chance. Noble turns to see.. Kane. As Noble goes up to Kane, he decides to run his mouth a little too much as Kane grabs him by the throat. Noble kicks Kane in the knee, releasing the chokehold, as Noble takes off toward the ring.
Kane comes out to ringside, following Noble and leaves him broken on the announcer's table after a Chokeslam.
Edge/Edgeheads: They show a recap of Edge as hes leaving the arena, irate after losing. Edge beats one of the Edgeheads' head against the car, asking where they were, then he turns to the other and completely bitch slaps him demanding that they just get in the car and drive.
Main Event: World Heavyweight Championship: C.M. Punk (c.) v. John Bradshaw Layfield: Somewhat of a back and forth match with Punk getting the early advantage with his speed, until J.B.L. realizes hes an actual Heavyweight wrestler and puts a stop to that shit. J.B.L. capitalizes on the match with his power, as he looks to gear toward a victory.
Punk regained the advantage and hit most of his signature moves. John Cena and Cryme Tyme appeared at the top of the ramp, as all three men rushed toward ringside and collided with J.B.L.'s security. J.B.L. regained the advantage by knocking Punk down, but was quickly distracted by Cena and company. As J.B.L. turned around he was lifted and caught with the G.T.S., as C.M. Punk picks up his second victory of the night and retains the World Heavyweight Championship.
After the match, Punk dove up and over the top rope, coming down onto everyone, as Raw ended with chaos everywhere.
Overall Thoughts: You'll have to excuse whether or not the review was half assed in a lot of spots after the Punk/Championship victory. I was slightly busy breaking anything I could find, and swearing rather violently at the television for how unbelievably stupid the W.W.E. has become.
Ratings must be absolute shit for them to go this low, and attempt bringing them back up. I mean, seriously. It was just a single night ago I was horrified by Mark Henry becoming a Heavyweight Champion, and now hes suddenly the second best Champion they have in the company.
Furthermore, it just leaves me dumbfounded to ever wonder why on earth W.W.E. would allow C.M. Punk to win the World Heavyweight Championship, and be the top guy, on their flagship show. Clearly Smackdown is becoming their flagship because Punk will take Raw to a whole new low. I mean, we're talking W.C.W. 2000 type of low.
C.M. Punk won more matches on tonight's episode of Raw, than hes won all fricken year. The guy contributes nothing to the program, other than making jobbers look like they might actually stand a chance at becoming something some day. I'm going to be rather honest.. J.B.L.
NOT winning to end Raw left me speechless even more than Punk winning in the first place.
I can understand needing to give him a Championship in return for winning that case, to make the MITB match continue to mean something for the future.. however to allow Punk to KEEP the Championship, when you have a golden opportunity to place it on someone who has proven himself and could lead your brand.. its just a stupid decision. C.M. Punk couldn't even carry E.C.W., how on earth is he going to carry Raw?!
In other news.. I'm hoping Katie Lea Burchill gets the Women's Championship at the Great American Bash. Melina should be fully healed and ready to come back by Summerslam, setting up Katie Lea v. Melina.
Ted Dibiase needs to have a single's match against Hardcore Holly, or an actual wrestler that he won't squash with one or two moves. I need to see him wrestle. If it continues to go too much longer, I'm gonna start assuming he can't. Cody's first night as a heel was pretty good as well. No Hardcore though, and I don't see this storyline carrying on forever.. so they really need to get Hardcore in there if they're gonna build it for all its worth.
Chris Jericho challenged Shawn Michaels to a match at the Great American Bash. I'm almost sure this will happen and Jericho will get a half-assed victory as H.B.K.'s eye won't fully be healed. That will allow the storyline to either continue to Summerslam, or even beyond to Unforgiven.
Kofi Kingston's first night as Intercontinental Champion, and he didn't look like anymore of a deserving Champion than C.M. Punk did to start the show. Kofi won via a fluke DQ call.
While I could see John Bradshaw Layfield and John Cena involved against C.M. Punk for the Champion.. okay, literally I have to stop. I can't see it, and its fucking ******ed as shit to even try. Punk will either face Edge in a rematch, or he'll lose the Championship before the Bash. Punk won't, or better fucking not be carrying that Championship into Summerslam. Punk needs to be thankful he isn't jobbing in dark matches, and he sure as hell sucked someone into utopia for even GIVING him that Championship. It makes me sick, and I'm finished.
On a professional level.. Raw was fast paced, full of shocking developments and deserves at least a
7-8 outta 10 rating. On a personal level, Raw was completely fricken awful and gets a
NEGATIVE 10 from me. I'm done.