Sam's Thread of Chattin' w/ Jake & Other Robust Subjects

[Tastycles]

I thought you were giving it another go.

 

[Dave]

Dude cut his hand. Guy grabbed my crotch from behind. Mediocre party.

Did the party just get better because of it?

 

[Барбоса]

If i ever feel the need to start texting or surfing the net while at a party or at the bar that is when I leave.

Actually did that tonight

 

[SavageTaker]

Hi Sam!

 

[Murfish]

Don't need that pair of Red Devils anymore, Jake. Sorry, but I'm getting a fresh pair of red suede pumas for christmas.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I. Will. Cut. You.

Merry Christmas all the same.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Everybody's too busy wanking over FTS's story rather than listening to my story. Guy thought he was hard and tackled me as I was drunk. Motherfucker slipped his head under my arm pit. Body scissors and guillotine choke, bitch!

 

[Uncle Sam]

Wank. Wank. Wank.

*****.

 

[Dave]

Hey, Sam!

How was the party?

 

[Tastycles]

Why did he attack you? Was he at the party?

 

[Uncle Sam]

Forgot to mention, someone saw me. Managed to close the window before they saw the web address. I shut down the computer and the person then informed everyone that "Sam was looking at gay porn!".

Cool. Cool.

 

[X]

Sam, have you ever awoken with your penis glued to your thigh? Thoughts?

Also, have you ever seen Once Upon a Time in America? Thoughts?

 

[Uncle Sam]

Hey, Sam!

How was the party?

I choked out one guy, got dragged off two other and then got into a fight with a good friend. I tried to choke him as he tried to shatter my ribs. It's hard to focus on choking someone when you're afraid your lungs will get punctured.

Overall, I feel like a man.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Sam, have you ever awoken with your penis glued to your thigh? Thoughts?

Also, have you ever seen Once Upon a Time in America? Thoughts?

Neither, I'm afraid.

 

[Tastycles]

I don't know which is worse in terms of street cred, wrestling forums or gay porn.

 

[Dave]

I choked out one guy, got dragged off two other and then got into a fight with a good friend. I tried to choke him as he tried to shatter my ribs. It's hard to focus on choking someone when you're afraid your lungs will get punctured.

Overall, I feel like a man.

Yeah, that sounds like a party all right.

Do you also feel like a Scotsman? I mean, you were drinking heavily and beating people up. What more do you need, with the obvious exception of haggis and a kilt.

 

[Tastycles]

I choked out one guy, got dragged off two other and then got into a fight with a good friend. I tried to choke him as he tried to shatter my ribs. It's hard to focus on choking someone when you're afraid your lungs will get punctured.

Overall, I feel like a man.

Your friends are definitely going to have a convorsation tomorrow that involves the sentence "Sam is such a dick when he's drunk".

 

[Uncle Sam]

Scotsman are *****es. If one were here right now, I'd let him tackle me.

Then... GUILLOTINE!

 

[Uncle Sam]

You're friends are definitely going to have a convorsation tomorrow that involves the sentence "Sam is such a dick when he's drunk".

Has happened at least three times before. This time, at least one of them will have a sore throat.

 

[Dave]

If it would make you feel better... I know of some Scottish people and where they can be found.

 

[Tastycles]

At least you didn't vomit on a snake.

 

[X]

Never seen Once Upon a Time in America? Burn your Blu-Rays sir, you do not deserve them.

Better than all three Godfathers combined.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I might have seen it by accident. Is it the musical with all the Mexicans?

 

[Uncle Sam]

Epic, episodic, tale of the lives of a small group of New York City Jewish gangsters spanning over 40 years. Told mostly in flashbacks and flash-forwards, the movie centers on small-time hood David 'Noodles' Aaronson and his lifelong partners in crime; Max, Cockeye and Patsy and their friends from growing up in the rough Jewish neighborhood of New York's Lower East Side in the 1920s, to the last years of Prohibition in the early 1930s, and then to the late 1960s where an elderly Noodles returns to New York after many years in hiding to look into the past.

Pfft.

I'm-a go watch Fringe. took me five hours to download. Their faces fall apart 'n' shit!

 

[X]

I might have seen it by accident. Is it the musical with all the Mexicans?

No it isn't you filthy ****e. It's the Sergio Leone four and a half hour long film about Jewish gangsters played by James Woods and Robert De Niro who graphically murder people and smoke opium. It's fucking Godly.