WWE Title Match: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns
My feelings of Reigns in a nutshell: Utterly Indifferent to the man overall, Profoundly disgusted by the blatant, boring, and often-botched pushing he's gotten over the past six months, and completely lacking in any faith towards WWE's ability to build stuff around him.
Essentially, I think Roman Reigns is the first true 'Replicant' Superstar(think Blade Runner) and that WWE has done NOTHING right from the break-up of the Shield to the Royal Rumble in order to build him. Yeah, the Universe is getting someone new in the top spotlight, but it's depressing to look at the overall body of the push and find it rotted out from the inside.
Now I'll admit to outright bias, because I thought pretty much from the start that Daniel Bryan's Main Event Storyline was much more appealing and organic than ANYTHING they could conjure up for Reigns, even when Bryan was out for what seemed like it would be forever and Reigns hadn't yet been betrayed by Creative. Even now I think that's the case. As far as the 'draw' is concerned, that's neither here nor there. I tend to think solid storytelling helps enhance the potential draw of your events, something that WWE seems to neglect more often than not.
But back to Reigns. I can sorta see the result already. You'll see snippets during WM about various people heavily complimenting Reigns on how far he's gotten and how strong he is in the ring, he'll pull the 'Monster Underdog' routine, withstand multiple F5s, hit a spear, 1-2-3, and nearly every wrestler will come to the ring to hoist him in the air and confetti will rain down and.... well, one wonders what the crowd response to such an event will be. If you're predictable, at least be entertaining, and something tells me you'll need to see blood to really rope in the crowd.
I dunno, there's just too many warning signs for the match, and I have no interest in Roman at all.
Sting vs. Triple H
Not gonna lie, a lot of my indifference to this feud is going to be because of Sour Grapes; mainly because I was such a mark for a Taker/Sting dream match that won't likely occur. That said, the recent 'banter' didn't do me any favors.
Here's the interesting thing about Haitch; no one EVER gets a leg up on him from a psychological standpoint. Whether it's directly on the mic or anything outside of an actual fight, he repeatedly gets the upper-hand. You may notice that during the reign of the Authority, the closest anyone's come to 'Firing Shots' at them on the mic is the stuff John Cena said during the Survivor Series build-up. Mostly it's a lot of softballs that don't 'sting' and permit Haitch and Steph to have the upper hand. Or the wrestlers simply want to take it into the ring instead. It works... but at this point I'm saturated by it. So having a Vigilante in Sting who's taking the fight to him directly and having fuck all to say about it? More of the same. Having Haitch talk shit for ten minutes and bend the truth to his whims makes for good heat but I've seen it before and it's why I keep clamoring for someone who will really take shots at him in equal measure, to make it a war. Make it really about Haitch's conduct as opposed to Haitch throwing more lies out the sides of his mouth on each and every raw, like Sting beating him at WM is going to undo all of that.
Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt
Like Sting, the same problems. The Dream Match sours my impressions, and the 'build-up' does nothing for me.
I get that it's a torch-passing(and fuck everyone who tries to inform me of this) but I honestly... well, I can't say I expected more. After all, last year's build was utter crap until Brock won. But the fact that we couldn't have Taker in ANY capacity, even a simple voice-over to spook Bray in the ring, depresses me. Bray's promos reached the saturation point ages ago and requires an equal dance partner to build substance out of the smoke and mirrors of his preaching. He's just not getting it though. This might change at WM when Taker finally reappears, but for now there's nothing.
Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins
It should've been Dean Ambrose.
No, no, fuck you. It absolutely should have been Dean Ambrose here, because the 'Shield Break-up' angle never ever got resolved(Rollins escaped the Cell match with his skin because of Bray fucking Wyatt needing something HOT to latch onto) and Orton should've been back ages ago. Orton should've at least been back to go after Rollins for Fast Lane if not be a shock participant at the Royal Rumble. But nooooope, Orton was kept as the backup option and kept on hold until now and this is what we're getting. Nothing against Randy, but it should've been Dean, and now it'll never be Dean.
It'll never be Dean because after this match Seth Rollins will unquestionably be upped to genuine Main Event status and will feud with Roman Reigns purely for the title and the broken bonds of brotherhood will mean NOTHING, no matter how often they refer to it. Goddamn it just THINKING about all this shit makes me hates myself for not being able to walk away all the more. Moving on before I kill myself...
Intercontinental Championship Ladder Match
With the potential exception of R-Truth, this ladder match may very well include everyone that got screwed over by the machinations of Creative. Dolph Ziggler, who got Roman's Survivor Series push and was promptly discarded. Dean Ambrose, also discarded and dumped despite his crazy path of revenge being red-hot and worth watching. Daniel Bryan, pretty much pushed aside for Roman Reigns. Bad News Barrett, essentially the latest in a long line of 'Doormat Champions' that have held this belt. Luke Harper, who SHOULD'VE been one of the bigger enforcers of the Authority but was left on the wayside. Then there's stuff like Stardust or even Sheamus possibly being added to it.
I mean, there's no disguising it; this is the Dump Match of the card- where WWE tries to toss in every popular wrestler they screwed in the hopes that the magic they create will SAVE the PPV.
Even the outcome is probably predictable, not because of the popularity of the winner, but for the benefits of their Top Star. Daniel Bryan's walking away the title holder simply because his position creates a stronger buffer zone that protects Reigns and ensures they tread water in a worst-case scenario. Daniel Bryan as IC champ having real wrestling matches on Raw and Smackdown helps ratings and keeps fan interest up. And it gives Roman Reigns a more favorable spotlight as it'll just be him versus the Authority for the ensuing months that lay ahead.
United States Title Match: John Cena vs. Rusev
The finish at Fast Lane, for the most part, was something I predicted and hoped for; Cena passing out in the Accolade. What I didn't want was the cheap shot that came before it, and the subsequent turn of the plot after the PPV.
WWE's typical botching had a lot to do with this probably, but they got me to see Rusev as a Sheep in Wolf's clothing- as in a Face who was simply a Heel because of what he 'represented'. Given how Rusev feuded with the likes of Jack Swagger, Big Show, and Mark Henry and continually kept looking like the good guy despite being the Anti-American foreigner, what I wanted was to see a conversion for Rusev during this program. Maybe have Rusev pull a Bret Hart and fume over the fact that Cena refused to tap and admit his inferiority, maybe have him in conflict with Lana, who would easily be the bitch heel in this case and say 'No Rematch' while Rusev says 'Rematch'. A number of ways could be done, but the overall gist is a face-face WM match that in a way does something positive for both wrestlers; it lets Rusev vary his path before his Russian shtick runs completely dry, and it lets Cena keep his mojo as the 'Gatekeeper' while demonstrating that someone can be Pro-American and face the man fairly.
...but that won't happen. The heels crowed about the unclean win like little bitches and refused a rematch. Typical. Supposedly the 'better' choice, but again, something I've seen before and something I didn't want to see happen. So that drained what little interest I had in the match.
But yes, John Cena will get that rematch by slightly shady ways(the Curt Axel speculation notwithstanding) and will get the win and the title at WM. And between him and Daniel Bryan, the barrier is set. Unless there's a Unification Match at Summerslam(and don't rule it out), I don't see where the 'EndChapter' moment is.
Andre The Giant Battle Royal II
Pretty much everyone else excluding a number of tag teams. Maybe some NXT guys will take part, albeit mere jobbers. Maybe a surprise guest or two.
But this time- unless he gets roped into a match- it'll be Big Show taking the title.
Keep in mind, it's not about elevating a talent this time around. If Big Show is part of this event, he's winning, because it protects him. The reason they'll protect him like this is because quite frankly, they are not done with him going against Roman Reigns, and he's likely to feud with him openly until the day Rollins finally cashes it in. That's the depressing part.
The dark horse candidate is Sheamus, if the big fella isn't inserted into the IC Match. Beyond those two, just no. Axelmania will get screwed, Mizdow screws Miz directly, Goldust probably screws Stardust in a bid to 'get Cody back', Ryback is but a road bump, Erick Rowan is again an afterthought... just, meh.
Divas Invitational Match
Well, we were spared a pure Bella/Bella match as the lone Divas segment at WM, so that's the good news. Bad news is... well, really, there's still a chance Brie will screw her sister in the bad way and take the belt and resume that feud anyways. Don't put it past WWE either.
I'm tempted to say, if you watch the E! Channel then you deserve a wholly undiscovered strain of STD that makes your junk combust, but that's cutting it kind of cruel. But really, that emphasis on Total Divas is a part of the 'Variety Pack' WWE tries to offer that I could do without. We've reached the point where the show dictates the division and that's bad news.
I wouldn't be surprised if they had Nikki retain. Nor would I really care.
Tag Team Title Match
The barest bones match probably would be Kidd/Cesaro versus the Usos. Given the Battle Royal, that'll likely be the case, as New Day and Ascension and the other jobber teams are likely filling up the ranks. I suppose it could be worse.
This really is shaping up to be another title change with the Usos in the role of the good guys- again. Predictable. Somewhat boring. The only saving grace might be the fact it gives Kidd and Cesaro something to do. While Kidd was doing fine for himself getting NXT Talent over, that Cesaro joining a Tag Team is a MASSIVE step up says everything you need to say about how thoroughly the guy was dumped on prior. Cesaro's one of those guys that would benefit from Smackdown turning into a Wrestling-heavy alternate programming as he'd immediately be Main Event material on that show.
All in all... this is a lackluster card in terms of story. It's gonna take a lot to steal the show and make it attention-worthy.