The Random RP Thread

Discussion in 'WZCW Roleplay Board' started by Monster Amongst Men, Apr 22, 2010.

  1. Remix

    Remix Is a thin rope

    Oct 25, 2009
    Likes Received:
    A black screen appears in the middle of Meltdown with words written in white.

    The following is a paid for presentation by the STA

    The screen abruptly cuts to grey tinted footage of a foreboding training area, burned canvas hanging from the ceiling. A man is relentlessly striking what appears to be a padded pillar. The shot zooms in to show that it’s a toned man with short blonde hair.

    Narrator: Those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.

    Grey footage of Wilhelm Wunderbar’s first title win, “The Saviour” Chris Jones tapping out to the Kaizerlock

    Narrator: A man who defeated his opponents in the ring.

    Grey footage of Vega submitting to the Kaizer

    Narrator: And out of it.

    Now full colour shots of Chris Jones melting down after another defeat at the hands of the Kaizer, punching a metal locker backstage after the match.

    Narrator: Fighting with more brutality...

    Grey footage of Wunderbar sending Vega through a table with a huge German Suplex

    Narrator: and intelligence than any other Mayhem competitot

    Shots of Wunderbar’s ambush on Chris Jones and his feint to knock him out in their final match from All or Nothing play

    Narrator: Tricked twice...

    Footage of Wunderbar forcing Stephen Holmes to submit before Chris Jones stole the win play

    Narrator: His title stolen at the last.

    Big Dave declaring Wunderbar would not be rewarded with the Mayhem title.

    Narrator: Those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.

    Chris Jones feels the Kaizerlock and is forced to submit.

    Narrator: He does not forgive or forget, and once again all will be forced to...

    Andrew Simmons taps out to the Kaizerlock, the start of a montage of every submission victory Wunderbar has obtained

    Narrator: Heil...

    Stephen Holmes taps

    Narrator: The...

    Chris Jones taps

    Narrator: Kaizer!

    Vega taps.

    The footage cuts to a German flag design.

    The true champion returns. “Kaizer” Wilhelm Wunderbar – Coming soon.
    Prince Vee likes this.
  2. Remix

    Remix Is a thin rope

    Oct 25, 2009
    Likes Received:
    A black screen appears, replacing the regular website.

    The following is a paid for presentation by the STA

    The black cuts away to show Wilhelm Wunderbar standing alone in The Circus’ ring, a table set up behind him, a bag sitting on it and a microphone in his hand. He climbs to the middle turnbuckle and brings the microphone to his mouth.

    Wilhelm: Ashes to ashes, dust to dust we now commit this division into the ground.

    He laughs, bitterly.

    Wilhelm: Three years I have waited for this. Three years I have bided my time, training Stark’s projects, touring his companies, all the while waiting for the day where I would finally be allowed to return for what is rightfully mine.

    He climbs down from the turnbuckle.

    Wilhelm: But there is a catch, always a catch. Firstly I must ‘earn good will’ suck the corporate shaft a little. Mr Banks wishes for me to produce 10 promos for If that is the price of retribution, I shall pay it. WZCW may be corrupt and self serving, but they do mostly honour their word.

    He walks back towards the table, the camera following his every move

    Wilhelm: Three years ago Big Dave stole from me what I earned through blood and victory, it was not his right to do so. Evidently Mr Banks agrees as Stark bought this back along with my contract

    Wunderbar opens the bag, reaching in and pulling out the shattered belt held together with duct tape.

    Wilhelm: This is the real thing, the authentic WZCW Mayhem title. Though Vega may be commemorated as the final Mayhem champion, he never should have kept the belt after he submitted to me.

    Wunderbar places the belt around his waist, doing it up with a menacing glint in his eyes.

    Wilhelm: I stand before you as the rightful Mayhem Champion. Whether WZCW acknowledge their theft and deception or not, the facts remain unchanged. I am Kaizer Wilhelm Wunderbar, champion by right and blood. My return will bring war like only a German can provide. In the name of my kingdom I will bleed again – but I will not bleed alone. Until I am given what is rightfully mine, I will cut a swath through this depleted roster, leaving them broken as a new toy on boxing day.

    Wunderbar, the belt still around his waist climbs to the second turnbuckle

    Wilhelm: Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, you committed my division into the ground. But it was not dead, I do no die. The grave bell has been rung. Ashes burn anew, dust the smoke it breathes. I walk again, the king uncrowned, albeit not for long. First, my opponents, then the rest will bow down and kiss the ring. By force or choice, it is inevitable because in the end all will...

    He smirks into the camera as he pauses before delivering his final words.

    Wilhelm: HEIL! THE! KAIZER!

    The footage cuts to a German flag design.

    The true champion returns. “Kaizer” Wilhelm Wunderbar – Coming soon.
  3. K Web V3

    K Web V3 The Premier Provider

    Jun 3, 2015
    Likes Received:
    You see the headline on the website....

    You click on the link....

    A video begins to play....

    Camera slowly zooms in on a female standing in a dark room.

    As the camera focuses, a spotlight shines on the still unknown woman.

    "Ladies and Gentlemen of WZCW, my name is Brittany O'Shea. You don't know me, but in due time, you will."

    The camera zooms around the woman, now identified as Brittany O'Shea. She's shown wearing tight fitting blue jeans, a gray wife beater with the Boston B on it, and a Red Sox hat, backwards.

    The camera centers on Brittany before screen fades to black.

    "They say the tag division is dying, withering and empty"

    "But it is only waiting to be redefined"

    A silhouette of a man losing match after match appears on the screen.

    "They say he can't win a match in WZCW. That he is all talk."

    The man is shown holding his head in frustration

    "But he will prove them wrong."

    A silhouette of a man in comedic situations appears on the screen.

    "They say he is a joke. That he is here only to further others careers."

    The man is shown being laughed at by fans and other wrestlers.

    "But he will show them that he's not laughing."

    "Two men....seizing an opportunity."

    The silhouettes begin to change into a more recognizable form.

    "Two men, on their own forgotten and overlooked"

    The images begin to focus, and the form of Logan McAllister is revealed.

    "But together, determined to suceed."

    Another form, that of a much more serious looking Armando Paradyse appears next to McAllister.

    "WZCW, next week, at Ascension 98, you will meet my men"

    "Mayhem is Coming....."

    A logo appears as music also begins playing.


    JamJam likes this.
  4. Spidercanrana

    Spidercanrana Should've Reinstated The Fox
    Staff Member Moderator E-Fed Mod

    Apr 1, 2010
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    Post #1: Bakka Batti! Bakka! <3

    Soooo not Kawaii right now! >.< Stupid promotion I was working under folded, and I was just making waves like a yandere would! Bakka! Oh well I guess this gives mwah some time to think about the bestest fed in the whole goddamn world- WZCW! And guess what time it is????

    Go on...don't leave this little WZCWeeaboo waitin' :D


    *toots horn royally*

    >>>>>>>KINGDOM COME 7 !!!<<<<<<<​

    Ha, Spoiler Alert? GET REKT MY OTAKUS!

    There's gonna be a haymaker of a main event. That no good sadistic Dr. Zeus is gonna try his luck at taking on the new WZCW Champion and heartthrob galore Theron "Da Warblade" Daggershield. I expect thems to go the distance in a nyan colored explosion of fan service!

    I said it. Fan Service. Give it to me WZCW you heartless peons -_-

    Speaking of goo goo gotta go front seat, the beauty queen of all beauty queens Eve Taylor is going to take on her own teammates of Cerberus- Ramparte and Flex Mussel! My gawd. My mutha****ing GAWD. I can't believe dis is happenin'. No way should the 3 Headed Koji of legend have to do this. Curse you Eve >.> still love you tho...

    Ahhh shiznit! Guess what else? We gots a Hall of Famer rumored to be going against the Eurasian Champion tooooooo. Titus (THE Titus, for you godless heathens out there and your stupid as H-E-L-L fedoras) is setting his sights on... Scumm? Johnny Scumm? Scummdiddly Yum???

    Wish senpai would notice me.

    Wish ALL the senpais noticed me. <.<

    Anywho, there's new blood in the tag division. There's Phantoms of Chaos, Men of Mayhem, and Children of the Damned. I wonder if I ever teamed with Kagura we'd be the Ladies of Japan. I'd ship it.

    I'd ship anything you don't ****ing know me. >:[ ****ing trolls GTFO !!!

    Lulz I kid. I love you internet people.

    So many exciting things going on with Kingdom Come around the corner, and just wanted to share my thoughts with you Otakus. Sooo I guess it's safe to say I'll be around here and there and everywhere and nowhere and where else?? hehehe. I'm Batti.

    Batti Otaku. The Fan To End All Fandoms. I'm a tsunami to you tsunderes. You can't hold down what I put down. I'm a mark that leaves a mark. So Kawaii guyz.

    Hmmm think I'll go ahead and purchase another ticket for Kingdom Come. Never hurts to have a dozen or so on hand. Maybe I'll give it to a wrestling fan in need. ;)

    The lights. The sounds. The superstars and their rock hard bods...gaw. Me gusta. I live for this. I live to be batty. I live for the applause:::::::::::: DDDDDDDDDD

    *plays Lady Gaga loud enough to warrant cops knocking on her apartment door* Like the IWC Police Can Stop Me!!! :p

    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    I live for Batti! the applause, applause, Batti! applause Batti!
    I live for the applause Batti! -plause, live Batti! for the applause-plause Batti!
    Live for the way that you Batti! cheer and Batti! scream for me Batti!
    The applause, applause, applause
    Bernkastel, Dagger Dias and NSL like this.
  5. Prince Vee

    Prince Vee Better than I think I am

    Nov 25, 2014
    Likes Received:
    Last night, aftermath the monstrous thunder and lightning, was just a grief for both of us. I put you out in the blue by resting under my cozy blanket, rest my head in the wrong direction than it used to be, by that time I never realized this night I am going to dream.

    Habitually, you know very well that I never like dreaming. But you don’t also know that I love dreaming as well. That’s an irony of my intellect. Some nights I would go back to my bed wondering and wanting to dream about something I love. But that never happened. What is it to be, when something that happens, when you never even anticipate to happen? I felt the splendor of it last night!

    Sorry for not curtailing my narration by skipping right into my dream, it’s just because, the prettiness of a present should always wrapped around with some glittering colored papers and also with a ribbon to it to finish it off for the better appraisal. Right, here I take you into my dream in which you were already in, but this time in a special role, A SPECTATOR.

    It started with my habitual routine of texting you. The sky darkens and even the moon is drawing its dark shaded blanket to cover it up to salvage the warmth of the summer, convectional even at the nights. I reached my bed to text you, but was surprisingly disturbed; because I never had been disturbed after I reach my bed, by my family. But tonight, it’s something that I never anticipated, not something inevitable, my Mum wanted my attention. She thought I never had been dissipating my time with her than just using my phone. That was the excuse she gave me but I had a conspiracy in my mind that, she probably wanted to know who I am texting.

    She lay next to me in my bed and gazed at me and not giving an opportunity for me to convey my feelings as words to your phone through the virtual god the internet. I couldn’t even announce to you that I can’t text you for a while at least. Her gaze has never let go off my phone and fingers. It was so distressing for me, knowing that you’re desperately waiting for my text. She was still waiting for my first move to start the enquiry. I touched my phone; the screen unlocks to show the dark background of my appealing face. But it was enough to illuminate the dark room. I paused for a while to perceive her reaction. She asked in a reprimanding yet sluggish tone who am I texting in the middle of the night. I shushed.

    Nothing more I could remember; how could I? Because I was still fantasizing. I swooped out of my bed and went down to lie in the sofa. She followed me, just like it was her assignment for her tonight to accuse me of something which she could’ve never imagined. I was still not ready to spill out a word. I know I can sound erratic and that might not help the situation. I didn’t act shabby this time. But still my mind was only supposing that you will be grieving and worrying.

    Maybe it could’ve been the thunder and lightning that struck before I slept gave the power to you. Maybe the god of lightning showed mercy for my pretty love. Thor, the god of lightning, is still a strong word for an atheist like me, but still I’m in the dream.

    You, by hook or by crook, got the power to teleport to the place you want and transform to the shape you want. Obviously, the place you wanted to be is where I am. It wasn’t so amazing for me to see you in my house at the next moment. I wasn’t dreaming I thought. I was all smiles, I was ecstatic that you’re finally in my house sitting with my family. All I could remember is your eyes. The astounding power of your eyes, I still can never forget. It was staggering through my heart. But your eyes weren’t in the color I have ever seen before. Maybe I was looking at the picture of Lova too often, that pretty dolly’s eyes, grayish black with the dark eyeballs with the marvelous shade to it. But those were your eyes now. And my family didn’t know you’re my love. They summon you into my room as a mere stranger. You tell them that you’re lost. But only I know that you had lost in my heart just like how I was lost in the world at that moment.

    You murmur into my ears that you want to cuddle me up just for once. You had teleported long way into my house just for this hug. Just at the moment we were commuting our love through our eyes. Your eyes were glowing, it was so strong, and I still am seeing it. Someone knock my door. Someone disrupt our love. It wasn’t a foe, if it was, it could’ve been a dreadful day for him. But it was my uncle and cousins. They were wondering who the blonde among us is. My parents were trying to elucidate who you were and what business you have in my house. But it was our question as well! What business they have to interrupt in our love? But they’re my family so we have to endure them and their grief.

    With the power comes the responsibility, but your mind was shabby right now, as it is just filled with love. You’re contriving a shabby plan to make my uncle to leave the house, so you can get to cuddle with me. You transform your shape into my aunt and came around to my door again calling my uncle out, feeble plan I should say. Any men can smell and feel the presence of his wife. So did my uncle, he could feel strongly that it was someone else, not his wife.

    Again it was your eyes, it was illuminating your face, and you were irksome my uncle to leave my house. But one thing was unclear, how you will chunk out my uncle to get back into our house. It was a dreadful plan but you were pretty strong with it! It was an unclear surrounding in my house, everyone were out crying. The milieu was pretty much grating and it all ended with the bawl, “It’s not my goddamn wife! Look at her eyes!!” My cousin joined the clash by adding, “That’s the Blonde!!” YOU VANISHED!

    I try to reroute them by saying, “She might be in the room I’ll look there”, anticipating that they won’t follow me. Just as my reckoning, you were in the roof but my whole family followed me there! Just before my cousin could catch you, I throw myself in tackling you to the floor and whisper in your ears, “Leave now and meet me in the roof later, please”, and I pretend myself to get pushed back by you and you disappeared again.

    My mind was dreadfully gloomy and miserable, I disdain that moment. The imposingly magnificent moment in my life turns dreadful. I never anticipated this anti-climax. I felt for something more could’ve happened. I was hapless just the way I am in my whole life. A while passed, I returned back to my roof, in the desire to meet you. But my dad was lying on a bed there at the roof and told me to get back to my room as it’s perilous out here.

    I tried to get back down the stairs, I heard some flapping noise. I gazed at my side to see something flapping its wings in the murky corner. It was a bat, I tried to chase it away, but it flappers its wings swiftly trying to acknowledge me something. I inquire the bat thinking, why am I even talking with a bat. The words I asked the bat were, “was it you?” I never thought you would transform into a bat! You gleefully climbed up my shoulder and kissed my cheek with your wings. I sent a gaze to you from the corner of my eyes and whispered with a grin, “You should transform into something else”. You changed into a sparrow and chirped into my ears in the way to ask me is this fine? I gave a smile and walked into my room. Mum was at the door and inquires what I am carrying? I inform her that it’s just a bird with an everlasting smile in my face; she glared at me with her witty eyes but not spills a word and just left.

    The smile in my face was never lost; you were just flirting with me by your feathers and chirps. I get into my bed and rest you in my chest. I was in a great deal of ecstasy. I covered up myself with my blanket and you were finally in the place where you want to be!

    I woke up, you know my mystical power to stop or pause the dream whenever I want. But this time I woke up not to stop my dream but to relish that final moment in my mind forever. I opened my laptop to write this to you, just to commute the everlasting smile of mine to your pretty face……
  6. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    A chubby, suit wearing Russ King is wandering backstage . He spots a cassette tape sitting on a table by a dressing room....

    RUSS : Huh, Pyromania by Def .......

    A dressing room door is kicked open. Out comes Remarkable Mark Keaton with his sunglasses on and black denim jacket...

    MARK : Hey Man ! Hands off my tape !

    Mark quickly swipes the tape out of Russ's hands..

    RUSS : Well, I'm glad I ran into you Mark....

    MARK : That's REMARKABLE Mark to you Russ, but continue...nice mic out of nowhere by the way. Do you carry that thing everywhere ? Same with the bogus camera following you around...

    RUSS : There is word going around that you are trying to make noise here in WZCW ? What is all the fuss about ?

    MARK : Hey, I'm not even supposed to be here talkin' to you man ! The powers above have not introduced me to the world yet ! This whole interview is illegal !

    RUSS : Well, I don't know about ....

    MARK : YOU'RE Illegal man ! Like, barf me out ! I'm super nervous , I better motor ....

    RUSS : Wait, wait !!

    MARK : Take a chill pill RUSS-O. Go ahead and ask me anything. The only answers you'll get will be Remarkable ones.

    RUSS : O.K, ahem. What is your philosophy of wrestling and how would you currently apply it to education ?

    MARK : I'm about to let some radical f-words fly here Russ. You want some education Russ King ? You want to ask me dumb ass questions in my first ever interview ? LET's GET....

    RUSS : Well, frankly, this is my first interview with a WZCW wrestler.

    MARK : Did you just call me Frankly ? Give me that f-word mic man !

    Mark grabs the mic out of Russ King's hand

    MARK : Now, it's my turn to interview you. First question ...

    RUSS : I'm not prepared for this, I'm here to ....

    MARK : FIRST QUESTION , LAME BRAIN ! In Knight Rider, what does K.I.T.T.'s name stand for?

    RUSS : Knight Rider ? I don't even know what that is.

    MARK : That's the wrong answer ! Anyway, I'm starting to get tired of all

    Hands back mic

    MARK : You have 34 seconds left to interview me. You better not ask me anymore hoser questions either. If this is going to be my first interview man , I want it to be grand . You hear me Jack ? You better get your act together and start doing a good interview.

    RUSS : Who do you want to.....

    MARK : Times up ! It's been fun but I gotta go.

    Remarkable Mark Keaton Walks away

    RUSS : Well, ladies and gentleman. That was Mark Keaton, I'm Russ King coming to you ....

    Mark grabs the mic again and pushes Russ out of the way

    MARK : That's REMARKABLE Mark Keaton !! I'm heavy metal , I'm twisted steel and sex appeal, so whatcha gonna do when the millions, and millions of Keaton's fans see that I'm the best there was , the best there is, and that's the bottom line if ya smeeeellllll what Remarkable cookin.
  7. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Russ King is backstage standing in front of a heavy looking vault door. There is a sign on the front of the door that reads - DO NOT OPEN - EVER -

    Russ King : Ladies and gentleman, I'm Russ King in front of the locker room of The Creeper. I can't help but get a nervous feeling standing here, sources close to me claim this creature stands at 7"1 and weighs in the higher end of three hundred pounds. How do you even get a monster like this in a room to weigh him ?

    The vault door slides to one side , green mist pours out and The Creeper takes a step next to Russ King, he towers over him. The Creeper is in full make up and gear and looks like he's ready to tear through Russ.

    Russ King : Gulping visibly - Um, h-h-hello The Creeper.

    The Creeper suddenly smiles, it's not a good sight with blackened teeth.

    With a rough, raspy voice it responds...

    The Creeper : Don't worry fat man. You're soul is too weak for me.

    Russ King : Creeper , what are your goals here in WZCW ? Who do you plan on targeting first ?

    Creeper : The souls King. I want strong souls to devour ! When I use my Soul Claw Slam ( showing open monster hand ) I will CLAIM ALL THE SOULS IN WZCW !!!

    Russ King : Describe, if you will...a typical pre-match ceremony you might do before a match ?

    The Creeper : (Smiling ) Well, first...I hold a picture of Russ King in front of me. Then I EAT the picture !!

    A strong glare at Russ King , Russ runs out of the room dropping the mic....

    The Creeper slowly picks the mic off of the floor....

    The Creeper : WZCW Locker room !! Get your souls prepared , because THE CREEPER is coming and there's no stopping the CARNAGE !!!

  8. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    In the parking lot before Kingdom Come 7 , Russ King is standing around the entrance to the building , looking uncomfortable as usual in his cheap suit....

    Russ King : Hello, ladies and gentlemen. I'm Russ King here at the entrance to Kingdom Come 7 , the promoters told me to be here at 8 PM to catch all the stars but I'm starting to get the feeling that they are already here. Somebody told me they saw S.H.I.T already inside in the backstage area. I'm not sure what exactly they were talking about and told them to watch their mouths. Wait a second ! For the love of god I can't believe what I'm seeing here .....

    A stretch red IROC Z Camaro slowly pulls up to the sidewalk. The engines let out a loud bark as it idles. The driver runs around and opens the back door. Two or three people let out a cheer as he opens the door to reveal Remarkable Mark Keaton, he's dressed in his best blue jeans and blue denim jacket.

    Russ King : Well, I was hoping for a bigger star but ....

    Mark Keaton : You'll have to settle for Remarkable man !! Ha haaa !! How is it goin Russy ?

    Russ : Never mind how I'm doing , what in the world are YOU doing here ? You are not on the card Mark.

    Mark : See this, this is a V.I.P ticket to see Kingdom Come 7 ! I'm here to scout the talent Russ ! I have to see what kind of competition is here in WZCW. I've been hearing stuff like Robots and Swamp monsters ...

    Russ : I interviewed a swamp monster recently. I thought he was going to eat me...

    Mark : I might just jump in the ring and hit somebody with a Very Rude Awakening.

    Russ : Well, you know you'll be fined if that happens. You haven't signed an official contract yet. When do you think WZCW will give you a contract ?

    Mark : I can't worry about that right now Russ. I have to keep training and trying to make as much noise as I can to get my elbow pad in the door. What's that ? You want my autograph dude ?

    Passerby doesn't pay attention to Mark Keaton...

    Mark : AHEM ! I said .... you wanted my AUTOGRAPH ?

    The Passerby shrugs and tries to get away, Mark grabs him and forces and autograph signature, the guy tries to fight off Mark but is pushed to the ground....

    Mark Excellent ! Ha haaa ! Did you see that Russ ? There's a little history for ya right there. My first ever autograph !

    Russ : Well, that was certainly....something.

    Mark : Well, I gotta get inside, I think I heard some announcements going off or something. Good luck on your next Creeper interview man ! Ha ha haaaa !!

  9. Beastmode 24


    Jul 30, 2011
    Likes Received:
    Every story has a beginning. Mine just happens to begin here:


    Nestled in the southern coalfields of West Virginia lies a small town called Delbarton.

    Formerly a jewel of the coalfields, Delbarton isn't much anymore; not since the coal mines that dominated the local economy started to close.

    Now with only a population of five hundred fifty-one, Delbarton is a shell of it's former self, and that's the reason I decided to leave here seven years ago and join the Army after high school. The choice was either that or just sit here and waste away.

    After spending the last seven years in service to our great country, I decided to move back home and give it a second chance. I thought maybe the new highway that was built would help out the economy; you know, bring new jobs and shit.

    It didn't.

    So I decided that it was now or never. Either I could sit here and waste away in this small town like every other person who was ever born here, or I could finally chase my dream and become something I've wanted to be since I was little.

    A professional wrestler.


    My name is Jeremiah Ashley.

    This is my story.

  10. Beastmode 24


    Jul 30, 2011
    Likes Received:
    Seven years ago I was just a small town boy that only cared about what party to go to on Friday night. Normally, those parties involved two main components:​


    Bonfires, and booze.

    I remember the last party I went to before I decided to leave home. I had been going back and forth on the decision for a while, but still hadn't made a decision yet. But on that warm summer night seven years ago as I looked around at all my friends having the time of their life, I realized something.

    If I stayed here where I was, this would be the rest of my life. I would never leave here; I'd never turn out to be anything other than just another hanger-on, someone who always talked about their glory days in high school.

    Another dreamer.

    As I looked into the faces of my friends, my buzz began to wear off as that reality set in. Right then and there by that fire I decided that I was going to do something about it.

    It was time to leave home.

    A couple of weeks later after racking my brain trying to figure out the best way to leave home, I decided that the only option would be for me to enlist in the Military.

    That’s how I wound up here.


    As I spoke with the recruiter, I found the light at the end of the tunnel getting closer.
    This was the only opportunity that I had to really leave home and try to make something of myself and I was going to take it.

    I ended up signing up for a seven year enlistment as an 11 Bravo.


    I had about a month in between enlisting and leaving for Basic Training, and in that month I pushed myself to my physical and mental limits to get ready for the task before me.

    My mom used that month to try and convince me not to go. My dad had passed away when I was 10 in a mining accident and ever since then it was just me and her. We had our fair share of arguments, and the worst one we had was about a week before I left.

    I had just gotten home from another rough workout, and mom was in one of her bad moods. She came in my room and asked me where I was, and it went from there.​

    Where have you been? You left hours ago and didn't tell me where you were going.

    I went the same place I've been going every day for three weeks now mom; to the gym to train. I leave next week and I have to be in the best shape I can be.

    Mom hated when I brought up the fact that I was leaving. A part of me believes to this day that she was jealous she never got a chance to leave. Getting pregnant at 15 and dropping out of high school isn't the best way to leave your small town behind, though.

    I knew as soon as I brought it up that it was going to be another fight.​

    Why do you want to leave for so bad Jeremiah? You've lived here your whole life! All of your friends are here, your family....I'm here. Isn't that good enough for you anymore?

    Shit. She's crying.

    I honestly didn't know what I could say to her to comfort her.​

    I want to leave here because I don't want to turn out like you! ....Or dad. Look, I know that you say that dad died doing what he loved and that I should be proud, but being a miner or just going to community college or not doing anything at all isn't good enough! I want to make something of myself. I want to get out of these hills and I want to become something. You won't understand.

    I push past her and make my way out of the house.

    The following week after my first experience ever on a plane ride, I find myself at Fort Benning, Georgia.


    Here I would spend the next 16 weeks being beaten down and re-molded into what the Army needed me to be.

    A killer.​
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  11. Miko


    Feb 18, 2008
    Likes Received:
    Eulogy for a fallen foe

    As S.H.I.T lay there next to Barbosa, medics attending the pair of them, both fallen after fighting a war, it felt almost tranquil for the first time in its short memory. It did something it thought it would never accomplish, it had defeated its longtime rival in a match as violent as the first. As ever, a dose of luck had decided the outcome, as it was simply a case of the one who landed on top who scored the win. It had achieved a victory it had savoured for quite some time.

    In truth, it wondered what it could achieve next that could match this. The potential book-end of a rivalry.

    That felt, strange, tragic.

    It wondered what would become of Barbosa after this, would he return to where he was before? Would he continue to terrorise the WZCW roster?

    Eulogy for a fallen friend

    I hope one day we can do this again!

    ------- ----------------- -------

    Through bleary eyes and muffled ears S.H.I.T could sense the movement around it, concerned and raised voices and silhouettes had been its main existence up to this point, though now it felt healthy enough to sit up, it attempted to do so.

    "Back with us?"

    The voice seemed to come out of this air, and S.H.I.T's first instinct was that Barbosa had returned to finish the job, though it quickly squashed that notion, realising that Barbosa would be as bad or perhaps a worse condition than itself. It scanned the room, locating the source of the voice, a small, bald man with thick spectacles staring at an iPad or some other functional device.

    S.H.I.T ignored him.

    "Quite a battle you had out there, we wondered if you were going to come through it alive."

    We the Machine noted.

    "Such a foolish notion, marching into a war, over what? Some vain notion of glory?"

    S.H.I.T wanted to rip the mans tiny head off of his tiny body, perhaps it would. His addams apple protruded too much and bobbled up and down when he spoke.

    "We'll be having no more of that, that kind of thing is a relic from a bygone era, and you are out of control," he said, "not now we have you back with us, finally."

    S.H.I.T tilted its head at the man, inviting him to continue.

    "Now you're our property again." As he finished the sentence the door opened and four other men walked into the room, these S.H.I.T noted were not office types, they were built rather more for intimidation. Fine, if it had to go through them to destroy the annoying man it would.

    "Can you stand?"

    S.H.I.T stood up slowly, gearing up for a fight.

    "Do you know what your next contest is?"

    S.H.I.T shook its head, noting that someone had made an effort to clean it up and replace its bodywork.

    "An Elite X openweight contest, or something of that ilk. You're facing Eve Taylor, although the condition you're in I don't exactly fancy your chances."

    He walked up to S.H.I.T, in reach of its grasp, it raised its hands to rip that irritating throat out of that irritating man. And found that it couldn't...

    "We'll have no more of that," he said, face still plain, "you are back in our control now. Oh I know what you're thinking, you're thinking you'll break free again, run amok, take part in ridiculous contests that only these humans could dream up, continuing to cause chaos. Well, you won't." His voice now seemingly raised an octave in anger. "I will illustrate my point, I will teach you a lesson. You will turn up for your title match, and you will lose.

    Not... possible S.H.I.T struggled to get the words out. The man laughed.

    We shall see, we shall see." Before S.H.I.T could react the four men circled it, handcuffing its hands and feet, with a chain connecting the two. "You stay like this now, unfortunately you are contractually obligated to compete, the chains come off then, and at other times only with my express permission."

    The men marshaled the unresisting machine out the door, with the annoying man following. "I expect you'll have liked another Elite Title reign, to further cement your "legacy", well, there is no chance of that happening now, nor will you compete in those bygone, reckless match types. There will be punishments in place for you."

    As it was being led away, S.H.I.T had only one thought.

    I will end you, Human
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  12. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
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    A shirtless old man shuffled his way down a deserted sidewalk, he rubbed his bare arms. A loud voice boomed from over his head...

    HEY ! Old Man ! Cold ?

    The old man looked up and nodded, he was too cold to say anything...the voice continued..

    WELL, I think it's time you got REMARKABLE MARK KEATON'S NEW T-SHIRT !!!



    For 5 payments of $18.99 you too can own this radical t-shirt!! BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

    The old man continued to walk down the street, shivering and rubbing his bare arms...

    I said THERE'S MORE!! Pay attention! Buy ONE REMARKABLE MARK KEATON shirt today, get the second shirt AT THE EXACT SAME PRICE!

    The shirt suddenly appeared on the old man, he didn't look pleased with the crappy design, plus he was still cold.

    Fade to black with the theme song LOOK WHAT THE CAT DRAGGED IN by POISON....
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  13. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
    E-Fed Mod

    Dec 7, 2007
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    The camera turns on and we see Leon Kensworth waiting backstage at WZCW headquarters listening to someone on his cell phone.

    Leon Kensworth
    Yes sir, I'll get that done today sir.

    Leon hangs up his phone and waits a few minutes when from down the hall we see 2 men walking up, one wearing a black fedora, black tank top and black jeans and the other wearing a tight white tshirt and blue jeans.

    Leon Kensworth
    Are either of you Anthony Mancini? I'm supposed to interview him for a spot on the WZCW roster.

    The man wearing all black looks at Leon with a slight scowl on his face with his arms crossed over his heavily muscled chest.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    That would be me Leon. This big Schlub next to me is Gino Rizzoli. Now before you start asking me questions I have a couple for you. Has anyone ever had to go through this crap just to get on the roster?

    A little flustered that someone is asking him questions instead of the other way around he takes a little bit to answer.

    Leon Kensworth
    Ummm, actually no not that I can recall. Maybe it has something to do with your family. I mean your father is the head of one of the most no...tor...ious...

    Gino's head comes up causing Leon to trail off before he can finish his sentence. Tony steps closer getting his face an inch or so away from Leon's.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Be careful what you say Leon accidents have a way of happening to some people. My father is in Waste Management, got it?

    Leon swallows hard and nods his head in agreement, sighing when Tony backs up. To get his bearings back he flips through his notes.

    Leon Kensworth
    Got it. Now if you get a WZCW contract who would you want to face?

    Keeping his eyes locked in to Leon's until Leon gets an uncomfortable look on his face

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    You're expecting me to name off all the title holders aren't you Leon? While I would love to jump right into a title picture I don't see that happening do you?

    Tony doesn't even wait for Leon to answer him before continuing.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    The truth is Leon it doesn't matter who they put in the ring with me. I may be new to pro wrestling but growing up in NYC I learned how to fight at an early age so I know I can handle my own.

    Leon is about to answer when his phone starts ringing. With a look of confusion on his face Lein answers it and listens to the person on the other end. Whatever is said causes Leon to look over at Tony and swallow hard.

    Leon Kensworth
    Yes sir, I'll tell him right away. I understand perfectly sir.

    He hangs up and looks at Tony with a little bit of trepidation in his eyes as he starts talking.

    Leon Kensworth
    That was upper management. They said because you got in my face just now that you won't be booked in a match until after the next PPV Apocalypse.

    Hearing that Tony's face goes beet red and he starts shaking with anger. To distract him Leon quickly moves on to his next question while Gino grabs him by the shoulder.

    Leon Kensworth
    If the opportunity ever arises for you to team up with another WZCW Superstar which one would you want it to be?

    Tony stares daggers into Leon and answers him in a whisper choked with fury

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    You just tell me that even going through all these hoops I won't have a match for weeks and you have the sack to ask me about tag teams? I don't think so Leon, I'm done. Let's get out of here Gino.

    The camera follows Tony & Gino as they walk down the hall but pans back to Leon as he swallows hard & wipes the sweat off his forehead before going dark.
  14. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
    E-Fed Mod

    Dec 7, 2007
    Likes Received:
    The camera turns on to the sight of Tony and Gino getting into Tony's car as Gino drives away from WZCW HQ to go to dinner.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Can you believe that crap Gino? Not putting me in a match until after Apocalypse? And all because I got in a guys face. With what he was saying about my family they're lucky that's all I did.

    Gino glances over at Tony, knowing better than to interrupt him while he's in one of his moods. He waits for him to wind down before saying anything.

    Gino Rizzoli
    Relax Tony you know people will spout any garbage they hear on the 6 O'clock news. Let them say whatever they want, if the FBI can't find anything then neither will Leon Kensworth or WZCW management. You need to calm down and think of something else before you do something stupid. How about you think about this new career of yours, like who would you like to face in your debut match?

    Tony's face goes from a beer red to a slight pink as he thinks on the question.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Out of everyone I would want to face Gino Galucci. We're both Italian, we're both from NYC, I love pizza & his family owns a pizza parlor. It practically writes itself. Knowing my luck though they'll probably have me face that other new guy Jeremiah Ashley.

    Tony sneers as he says Ashley's name thinking he's better than that. Gino glances over at Tony with a questioning look on his face.

    Gino Rizzoli
    Galucci? I thought for sure you would mention at least 1 title holder now that Kensworth isn't around. And speaking of titles would you ever want to be in a Tag Team with anyone?

    Tony looks at Gino like he's lost his mind. This time he doesn't have to think about the answer and starts talking immediately.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Of course I would love to go right into a title picture Gino. I know & you know I can beat Titus Avison and Eve Taylor. Hell I could probably beat Dr. Zeus for the World Title if I really wanted to. They won't do that though and it's all because of who they think my family is.

    Gino sees Tony getting heated again and quickly goes to distract him again.

    Gino Rizzoli
    What about the Tag Titles Tony?

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    You heard what Dad said Gino, agent Henderson will do anything to take down the Family. Any one of those guys could be wearing a wire for him. I think it's best if I stay by myself until I get Henderson off my back. Now I'm done talking about this, it's just gonna irritate me and I would like to enjoy my dinner.

    As they pull up in the valet parking area Tony's phone starts to ringing. He sees that it's his father and answers it as the camera fades to black.
  15. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
    E-Fed Mod

    Dec 7, 2007
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    As the camera comes into focus we see Gino driving down the streets of Little Italy while Tony is once again talking to his father on the phone.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Yeah Pops me & Gino will take care of it.
    (Looking over at Gino).Turn here Gino it's down that way. Yes Pops I'm still here, don't worry about anything I'll call you when it's done.

    Tony hangs up his phone and stares out the window as Gino pulls up in front of a small family owned Italian deli. They both get out of the car and walk in causing the couple behind the desk to look up. When they see who it is their faces go white and the man stops what he's doing, leaving his wife alone to help the customers. Tony motions Gino after him as he goes up to the counter and orders lunch.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    I'll hace 2 Italian sausages with sauerkraut, stone ground mustard and 2 large Dr. Peppers. Mrs. G.

    If looks could kill the little old lady behind the counter would have killed Tony on the spot with the glare she directed his way. Despite not wanting him there she gets his food ready and hands it to him as he gives her $20. He only takes a couple bites when Gino comes out of the back office and whisper's in Tony's ear. Whatever he says causes Tony to sigh and wipe his mouth as he gets up, following Gino into the back office where the man is sitting behind his desk.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Gino here is telling me some disturbing news Mr. Gerlette and I find it very hard to believe. You didn't forget who it was that gave you the money to open this place did you? Without my father you would have ended up working in the factories like everyone else when they got off the boat. You can send your daughter to NYU because of my family's generosity all those years ago.

    Mr. Gerlette's eyes go as wide as saucers as Tony leans on the desk and gets uncomfortably close causing Mr. Gerlette to slide back a bit, swallowing hard.

    Mr. Gerlette
    Of course we haven't forgotten your father's generosity Mr. Mancini, it's just that we don't have the money this month. Between our daughter's tuition this semester, the bills and people not coming in like they used to we barely have enough to stay in business. It's not that we don't want to repay your father it's that we really can't.

    He looks at Tony with fear in his eyes and sweat on his brow as he stands up straight and looks over at Gino.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    I'm sorry to hear that Mr. Gerlette I really am. I'm sure my father will be sorry as well. He'll have to send someone else next time because I'm going to be a WZCW Superstar. I'm guessing Pop will send Big Vito and he won't be nearly as nice as I've been. He likes to say "accidents happen" when he gets bad news and somehow he's right every single time.

    Tony shrugs like it's no concern to him while the fear in Mr. Gerlette's eyes reach new heights.

    Mr. Gerlette
    Th...there has to be something I can do, I don't want to upset your more than generous father.

    Tony "B.G."
    No, no, no it's OK don't worry about it. I'm sure my father will understand and tell Big Vito to be nice when he stops by in the next few weeks.

    Mr. Gerlette quickly goes to his safe in the corner and pulls out the cash he does have which like he said isn't much.

    Mr. Gerlette
    It's no trouble I assure you. I should be able to give a little bit as a token of my thanks for his help getting this place open.

    He looks down and starts counting out money so he misses the look Tony gives Gino and jumps about a foot in the air as Gino snatches all the money and shoves it in his pocket.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Thank you very much Mr. Gerlette I'm sure my father will be very pleased with what you were able to repay this month and more than usual. I'll be sure to let him know how accommodating and forthcoming you were today.

    As Mr. Gerlette gets up to leave Tony grabs him and kisses both cheeks like they're old friends. He opens the door and leaves without saying anything as Tony and Gino follow him to the front of the store. They sit down and finish their meal completely ignoring Mr. and Mrs. Gerlette.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Let's go Gino. We need to call my father and start packing our stuff to head out with the WZCW crew.

    As they get up to leave the door opens and in walks FBI agent Derek Henderson head of the New York branch of the Organized Crime unit.

    Agent Henderson
    Fancy seeing you here Mancini. Here to extort these people or just intimidate them this time around?

    Agent Henderson stands at the side of Tony's table as Tony gets his trash ready to throw away.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    Hey hey Big D, didn't see you there. Me and Gino were just enjoying a quick lunch before we head out with WZCW. If you haven't heard yet I got a developmental contract with them.

    Agent Henderson
    I guess they're hurting for talent if they'll take someone like you. You'll extort people for your father all over the country then huh?

    Tony's eyes narrow at the mention of his father but he manages to keep his voice level when he starts talking again.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    My father is in waste management Big D how many times do I have to tell you that? And the Gerlette's here are old family friends, so I figured I would stop by before I leave.

    Mr. Gerlette jumps at the mention of his name while Mrs. Gerlette glares at Tony and Gino none of which is lost on Agent Henderson.

    Agent Henderson
    First off Mancini the name is Agent Henderson not Big D. Second you're not going anywhere except downtown so we can have a chat. If it our chat goes the way I think it will WZCW will have to find another guido to take your place.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    That hurts Big D and here I thought we were becoming friends. Gino go talk to my father, it's time to make that lawyer earn that retainer he gets every month.

    Gino nods and quickly heads out the door to go tell Angelo Mancini what's happening. Agent Henderson watches him before grabbing Tony by the bicep and marching him out the door to his waiting Government issued SUV with his partner in the driver's seat.

    Agent Henderson
    You know how this works Mancini, turn around I got a pair of bracelets for you to try on.

    Tony stays silent while he turns around and lets Agent Henderson handcuff him and read him his rights before shoving him in the back seat. The camera watches the SUV drive away, getting smaller and smaller as it fades to black.
  16. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
    E-Fed Mod

    Dec 7, 2007
    Likes Received:
    The camera fades in to show us Tony Mancini sitting in an FBI interrogation room with his hands cuffed to the table. Instead of being angry or upset he is waiting patiently for Agent Henderson. He doesn't have to wait more than a few minutes for him to come in with carrying a manila folder full of papers which he slams down onto the table in a cheap attempt to catch Tony off guard.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    You're wasting your time Big D I'm not saying a word until my lawyer gets here.

    Agent Henderson
    That's OK because right now all you have to do is listen because I have a little story to tell.

    He opens the folder and looks through it in silence for a couple minutes before looking back up showing nothing of what he is thinking in his eyes or his face.

    Agent Henderson
    About a month ago a Manhattan night club gets burned to the ground due to an explosion only days before it's supposed to open up. The local police called us in just recently when it became apparent that the owners had ties to the Valentino Crime Family. Now aren't they your father's biggest rivals in the Organized Crime world?

    Tony stares at Agent Henderson in complete silence as he flips to the next page of his report and continues without missing a beat.

    Agent Henderson
    The owner was working late that night to get everything ready when be hears 2 Molotov Cocktails being thrown through a window in the kitchen. He gets up to go see what happened when the entire building goes up in a ball of flame due to a gas leak. He didn't stand a chance of making it out before the explosion.

    Henderson slams a picture of a charred corpse in front of Tony hoping to shock him into saying something but Tony doesn't rise to the bait & stares emotionless at the picture as his lawyer walks in and sets a briefcase on the table.

    Antonio Scarletti
    Ok Agent that's enough of that. Tell my client why he's being held or we're leaving right now.

    Agent Henderson grabs the picture and puts it back in folder before setting it to the side.

    Agent Henderson
    I was just getting to that counselor. The gas leak that caused the explosion was not an accident, neither was the owner dying that night. Your client along with one 'Big Vito' Corleone went to that club that night to murder that club owner and make it look like an accident. What neither of them knew was they were being watched by a homeless man from the alley across the street.

    Scarletti whispers in Tony's ear saying something that causes Tony to smirk.

    Antonio Scarletti
    So let me get this right. You're hinging all of this on the ID from a bum on the streets who for all we know was high on drugs and/or drunk as a skunk. I doubt you can even find him again can you?

    Agent Henderson stares back and forth from Tony to Scarletti with anger in his eyes

    Agent Henderson
    Don't worry about my witness, I'll be able to find him again when I need him. What you're client needs to worry about is being charged with 1st degree muder.

    Tony leans forward with a gleam in his eye.

    Tony " B.G." Mancini
    You're bluffing Big D and we all know it. If you had enough to prove 1st degree murder then we would be having this conversation with me behind bars instead of across the table. Besides I have no idea what you're talking about. Me & Vito were nowhere near Manhatten. We were at a strip club in Brooklyn that night.

    Agent Henderson slams his palms on the table in anger before getting an inch away from Tony's face.

    Agent Henderson
    I'm gonna nail you this time Mancini. No one deserves to die like that no matter who they worked for. You're going away for the rest of your pathetic, miserable life so you better enjoy this new wrestling gig while it lasts.

    Antonio Scarletti
    That is more than enough of that Agent Henderson. Now if you're not going to charge my client with anything we're leaving now, uncuff him please.

    Agent Henderson uncuffs Tony without taking his eyes off of Tony's face. When the cuffs are off he rubs his wrists and whispers something in his lawyers ear who whispers something back in his.

    Tony "B.G." Mancini
    See ya around Big D. Hey why don't you come to my house this Sunday? My grandmama makes a pasta carbanara to die for.

    Agent Henderson completely ignores him as he picks up his folder and storms out of the room. Tony chuckled as he and his lawyer talk quietly while walking out of the room with the camera fading to black in the empty room.
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  17. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
    E-Fed Mod

    Dec 7, 2007
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    The camera comes into focus showing us the Mancini family and their friends sitting in the pews of their local Catholic Church. Father Marconi is saying the final prayer in Latin. When he's done he walks to the front door and greets everyone as they leave. When the Mancini family reaches him he tells Angelo and Priscilla to have a great day before blessing them on their way out. He asks Tony to stay behind so he can talk to him.

    Tony Mancini: Sure thing Father, I'll just wait in your office.

    Tony says goodbye to his family as he kisses his mother on the cheek and tells his father he'll be home in time for their traditional Sunday night dinner. He only has to wait a few minutes before Father Marconi walks in and sits behind his desk.

    Father Marconi: Anthony how are you? It's been a while since I've seen you at Mass. I take it you've been busy helping run your father's waste management business.

    Father Marconi looks like he has more on his mind than just Tony missing a few weeks of Mass but he looks a bit frightened as well so Tony talks to him to help him relax.

    Tony Mancini: I've actually been training to become a professional wrestler Father. And it paid off, I got signed to a developmental contract by WZCW.

    Father Marconi: That's fantastic news Tony a man should follow his dreams, does your father approve?

    At the mention of his father Tony's face darkens a bit but he quickly puts a smile on his face.

    Tony Mancini: Not really but he's letting me do it anyway. I plan on showing him that this will work without bringing any undue attention to us.

    At the word attention Tony sees a flicker of what could be fear in Father Marconi's eyes.

    Alright Father what's wrong? You look like you saw Satan in your Cheerios, what's wrong?

    Father Marconi looks at Tony and takes a deep breath, like he's afraid of what might be said if he answers that question.

    Father Marconi: Someone came in and asked a lot of questions about you and gave me some disturbing information that I pray is not true. He said his name was Agent Derek Henderson with the FBI.

    At the mention of the FBI Tony smiles and shakes his head in disbelief.

    Tony Mancini: Let me guess, he accused me of burning down a club that had ties to the Valentino Family while the owner was inside? Father Marconi nods silently while Tony continues talking. He cuffed me an interrogated me downtown. What did you tell him if you don't mind me asking.

    Father Marconi: I told him I've known you since your Christening and I watched you grow up in this Church. There is no way you could have done what you're being accused there?

    Tony Mancini: Of course not Father, God knows I'm not perfect and I've made my share of mistakes but I could never intentionally hurt anyone.

    Father Marconi heaves a large sigh with a look of relief on his face as he smiles.

    Father Marconi: That's what I told him but he didn't believe me, he told me if I was holding anything back I would do federal prison time for Obstruction of Justice as well as aiding and abetting.

    Tony Mancini: Don't worry Father nothing will happen to you, next time I see Agent Henderson I'll ask him to leave you alone. Now if you'll excuse me I dangerously close to being late for dinner and you know how my mother hates it when someone is late for dinner.

    Father Marconi smiles in relief as both men get up and embrace as the camera fades out.


    The camera comes back into focus on the entire Mancini family as well as their friends sitting around a large dining room table in the Mancini house. Mr. Mancini says a prayer over the meal, then everyone digs in.

    Priscilla Mancini: So Tony you haven't been around recently, your father tells me you've become a professional wrestler that's not true is it?

    Tony sees his father's face darken as he quietly talks to Big Vito about what happened last month.

    Tony Mancini: It is Ma, I got a contract with the biggest promotion in the U.S. WZCW.

    Tony sees his parents exchange a look that causes him to throw his hands up and let out a long exasperated sigh.

    Tony Mancini: I know neither of you approve although I still don't know why. I thought you would be happy for me Ma, this is my dream. Didn't great-granddad come over from Italy to find the American dream?

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Don't talk to your mother like that, you're not to old for me to smack you in the mouth if I need to.

    Priscilla raises her hands to forestall the argument that's brewing between her husband and son.

    Priscilla Mancini: He did but me and your father were hoping you would join the family business. Your father took over after his father passed away and we thought you would do the same.

    Tony sees the look in his father's eyes that tells him there is more on his father's mind than what's being said. He also knows enough that it would be a bad idea to say anything at the dinner table.

    Tony Mancini: I know ma, I fully plan on taking over after pop retires but that won't be for a long time yet.

    Priscilla sighs and drops it, instead she turns to Gino letting Tony eat in silence.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Alright dear me and the guys have some business to take care of if you want to take the ladies out back by the pool and have a few drinks.

    Priscilla nods as everyone gets up. Priscilla herds the ladies outside while Angelo and the guys walk to his office. The camera bobs up and down as it slowly fades out.


    The camera comes back into focus just as Angelo backhands his son viciously across the face.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Would you care to tell me why the Valentino Family is getting ready for a war? Tony tries to answer by goes silent when his father raises his hand a second time. Do not say a word boy, I know exactly why.

    With effort Angelo calms down and sits behind his desk with Big Vito Corleone on one side and Gino Rizzoli on the other.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Why in the name of the Holy Mother didn't you check to see if anyone was inside that club first? You were supposed to send a message to Carlo Valentino not kill his wife's favorite nephew!

    Tony can see his father's face turning red again so he quickly answers him to keep him from exploding.

    Tony Mancini: We cased the place for a whole week Pops! How were we supposed to know on the night we were gonna torch the place he would decide to stay late? Let me fix this this before things get out of hand.

    His father shakes his head in disbelief as he runs his hand through his hair.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: It's to late for that Tony. Some of our operations have already been hit, they've started killing our guys and I can't let that slide.

    Tony shakes his head, not believing what he's hearing.

    Tony Mancini: There hasn't been a war in over 50 years. There has to be something I can do.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Carlo Valentino wants your head, he's made it clear that nothing short of that will call him off.

    The blood drains from Tony's face as he looks at the men around the room.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: Don't worry Tony, I told him there's no chance in hell I was going to hand you over to be slaughtered. What I want you to do is reconsider becoming a wrestler. He knows where you'll be months in advance thanks to the schedule up on their website.

    Tony shakes his head no before his father finishes talking.

    Tony Mancini: I can't do that Pops I am under contract with WZCW now. Besides I'll have Gino with me the whole time, nothing will happen to me.

    "Don" Angelo Mancini: And what about Agent Henderson? Tony looks at his father with shock and a little bit of fear in his eyes at the mention of the FBI. What, did you think I wouldn't hear about my son getting picked up by the head of the New York branch of the FBI's Organized Crime division? Your lucky he let you go, he's been after us for years and he doesn't give up once he has something.

    Tony and Gino exchange a look that doesn't escape Angelo's notice although waits for Tony to explain.

    Tony Mancini: Don't worry about that Pops, you have enough on your plate with the Valentino Family. Me and Gino will take care of Agent Henderson.

    Angelo nods his head and gets down to business as the camera fades to black.
  18. Spidercanrana

    Spidercanrana Should've Reinstated The Fox
    Staff Member Moderator E-Fed Mod

    Apr 1, 2010
    Likes Received:
    Editor's Note: I needed something comical to work on. So here. May God have mercy on your souls for reading it.


    &#9836; "IS THIS THE REAL LIFE..." &#9836;

    "...please don't start singing."

    &#9836; "IS THIS JUST FANTASY?" &#9836;





    Batti's Blog #360NoScope

    Konichiwa, my fellow WZCWeeaboos!i! Trash Queen Batti Muthafuggin' Otaku here posting on the greeeeatest show of all time. I'm driving my employer AKA bestie Godfrey Ramparte up a wall with my fanTastical singing but I ain't sweating it. I can carry a tune. Ram can't even carry his cane without talking to the damn thing. #noshade.

    Just got done watching the new comic book movie trailer for Murder Mob. Great stuff. Carley Winn is bae. Oh question for the Comments Section: Do you think I can cosplay her? ::::::


    Nawww probs not. I ain't that crazy. Am I? AM I CRAZY?!?

    But on to the Apocalypse. Bleak name, eh? Needs to be more colorful. Welllll Zeus and Theron are main eventing...they are so fucking Kawaii guys, like totes the hottest pieces of yum this side of the ring. Should call it FApocalypse. AAAaaanyways I'm getting off subject.

    I do that. Like, no joke. Ska music.

    What I wanted to chitty chat with you raggamuffins is how it's like being Rammy-chan's #1 Squeeze. It's not what some of ya guys thought it'd be :/ no steamy frickle frackle goingz on tbh. You'd think with all the Flex/Eve/Ram fan fiction I have read (and written) I'd know how to see Ram's "special cane". Nope.avi. He just seems REALLLLLY off about that kinda thing. Not at all the sexy beast he obviously looks like. What a downer.

    Anywho, I iron his shirts, drive him around, and peep on him in the shower. Oh stahp you know if you were in mah shoes you would too. But it's not as hot as it sounds. I only did it once and come to find out Ram's booty is a little on the "Harry Potter" side. Catch my book reference? He'd like that. Or not.

    Is this a Random RP? Almost sounds like one, don't it? Weird. Wait no I have to roleplay as somebody.

    I know! I'm Ramparte. I am sulky and stuff and 20th century novels give me a hard on. I sleep with a cane. What I lack downstairs I make up for wif my pretentious attitude and I quote Literature that I only read that day. Sigmund Freud would have a field day with me.

    Gosh no no that's not cool. Rammikun has his plus sides too ya know. He cleans up well. Can be a gentleman at times. Like when he's just finished a book. Or took a nice BM. One day he bought me Manga. He sighed at the pictures and all but gave in when I told him it's just another way of story-telling. He can be sweet.

    Look at me being all mushy!
    :3 What a hairy assed hunk he is. Hope he doesn't log on to and check this blog...he isn't tech savvy that I know of...

    Logging off nao! Later peeps and remember: Otaku is Love. Otaku is Life.


    Dagger Dias and Hyorinmaru like this.
  19. M

    M ☆*:.。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆

    Feb 19, 2009
    Likes Received:
    Of course I sometimes wish harm upon others, it's what I'd consider to be one of the key components that still anchor me down to this label of humanity. Surely I'm a human, this body doesn't exactly do much outside of the usual human stuff, so humanity is all that remains, right? Even the stuff that comprises the thought processes I have is made out of human material, there's no albino rhino inside of this noggin, nor any other mere "animal" for that matter. So this feeling of difference certainly is a product of a human concoction - "meant to happen". But then why is everything so different? Why am I only limited to one human brain? That sounds like a stupid question to ask, but I can look into the eyes of another seemingly human being and they'll be completely different to me, and they'll have a human mind I'll never understand. It makes me feel limited in everything I do, like I'm stuck here, a half full jar of wisdom on a shelf with the lid screwed too tight to ever open. Does everyone else feel this way too? Do they understand the concept? Have they somehow made peace with it all? More and more I see instances of humans with a sense of mental disconnect. There's always something wrong with an opinion. There's always something that a human wouldn't "get" be it a joke or maths or expression. Does me not understanding why people don't "get" things make me one of them?

    I'm not going to take that. If what makes me human is not understanding why humans are human under my very own definition, then why should I bother being human myself? Thinking these things is all well and good but it's useless if I can't physically change anything, so I guess rambling to justify my actions in a place no one cares about and playing straightman to a maniacal supervillain is what I'll settle with for now. No response at all is better than another bloody "ohayou gozaimasu! :3".
  20. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    March 6th 2016 -

    Detroit Pavillion Mall - 230 Dreash Avenue -

    Special press conference.

    Mayor Trench Gaston - "No, I'm not taking questions right now guy, the press conference just started. AHEM. People of Detroit and WZCW wrestling fans. We all know our hometown hero Remarkable Mark Keaton will be soon heading to the PPV going after the WZCW Tag Team Championships....

    Cheering, more cheering.... MORE CHEERING

    ....... anyway, as mayor of Detroit and my office wish him and Justin Cooper luck. But that's not what this press conference is about. For years I've been writing letters to WZCW trying to get the federation in Detroit to wrestle in front of our thousands of wild wrestling fans here. Detroit is a hotbed of wrestling maniacs. But for some reason, the powers that be in WZCW will not bring any shows to Detroit.

    BOOOOO !!! BOOOOOOOOOOO!!! the only thing we can do is to get on Social Media, write letters and get the word out...#DetroitwantsWZCW, our voices will make a difference. Thank you for your time.
    ShinChan likes this.
  21. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:

    Mark Keaton&#8217;s Studio Apartment.....

    **Mark and Norman had some interactions, Norman wrote a letter for Mark because he kept screwing up a letter to his parents, they also discovered that everytime they said TY BURNA, the candles would light up...but due to the RP being over 40000, I had to erase this entire section. ***


    Detroit City Airport......

    Cooper and Iris walked out of the huge glass exit of the Airport terminal.

    &#8220;Damn,&#8221; Cooper snapped his fingers,&#8221;I forgot my sunglasses on the plane. We&#8217;ll have to go back and find them.&#8221;

    &#8220;We can just buy another pair.&#8221; Iris protested.

    &#8220;That&#8217;s a ten thousand dollar pair of sunglasses made with genuine Prince Edward Island Oak and leather imported from Germany.&#8221; Cooper gave Iris a stern look and they went back to the plane in search of the really expensive sunglasses.

    Cooper&#8217;s ride (provided by Keaton) waited by the curb.



    Back at the apartment.....

    &#8220;So was that good?&#8221; Norman watched Mark read the letter as The Remarkable One slipped on his thick leather jacket with white RMK letters on the back.

    &#8220;Ya, it was rad. I really like the part where you said - I miss you&#8217;s - Are you sure you don&#8217;t write television daytime drama stuff Norm?&#8221;

    &#8220;Aww, you be playin dog!&#8221; Norman laughed and gave Mark a jab on the shoulder.

    &#8220;Don&#8217;t do that.&#8221;


    &#8220;Don&#8217;t talk street talk, that&#8217;s my gig dude. You just be normal alright?&#8221;

    They walked out of the apartment and down to the street, a white limo was waiting for them, a bright red RMK was painted on the side. Mark nodded, he tried to hide how impressed he was from Norman.

    Pretty good so far Norman, Mark thought as he sat in the light brown leather seat, pretty good indeed. He could still smell the new car smell as the engines purred to life.

    &#8220;I always wanted to do this.&#8221; Mark said, trying to hide his giddiness. He pressed a button on the console behind the seat,&#8221;Driver, take me to East side street, pronto!&#8221;

    The console opened and a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice rolled out on a silver tray, with todays Detroit City Newspaper newspaper folded neatly next to the silver bucket.

    &#8220;You pressed the champagne in a bucket of ice with today&#8217;s newspaper button, here&#8217;s the drivers button.&#8221; Norman pressed the button.

    Mark leaned close to the button and repeated his command, the driver responded over the intercom that Mark didn&#8217;t have to yell. He also informed them that he wasn&#8217;t that old and he wanted a raise.

    &#8220;Hey, don&#8217;t blow up on me dude! I&#8217;m new to this whole button technology stuff.&#8221;

    They were off. Mark leaned back in his seat and watched the people of Detroit react to his awesome limo going down the street. That&#8217;s right Detroit! Remarkable on the move!

    The limo made a right turn and continued on down Earlington street towards the suburbs and recreation parks. Mark wanted to mail his letter near East side street because of the scenery that stretched behind the mailbox to the bay. There were plenty of other mailboxes, he just wanted to go for a drive, Cooper wouldn&#8217;t be arriving in several hours anyway.

    Mark once again gave himself the middle finger and watched it pixelate before his very eyes, even in the luxury of the limo, the censorship was still fascinating him. Norman relaxed and flipped open the newspaper. He gave it a couple of extra flaps for good measure.

    &#8220;Ahem.&#8221; Norman ahemed, he gave the newspaper another flap. Then another flap just in case all the wrinkles didn&#8217;t come out.

    &#8220;Ahem, ahuh, ahem.&#8221; Norman flapped the paper again. Mark grabbed the newspaper roughly out of Norman&#8217;s grasp and threw it out of the window. Then everything seemed to slow down, the old man on the park bench slowly turned his finger around to see what he picked out of his nose, the poodle that was getting ignored by it&#8217;s owner as she chatted with her friend slowly lifted his leg to piss on a nearby tree, the pee streamed out and splashed in slow motion as well, all of this slow motion was because Mark saw her....


    Melissa Kinrad - Daughter of Sheriff Kinrad - Official stats: 22 years old, blond, hot as hell!
    .......but she was walking with some other guy. Mark pressed a button on the seat,&#8221;Driver, stop the car next to that hot blond!&#8221; A mechanical hand came out of the console and made weird messaging motions.

    &#8220;Whoa,&#8221;Norman laughed,&#8221; I guess I know what I&#8217;ll be doing later!&#8221;

    &#8220;Damn Norm! Get the driver to stop next to Melissa!&#8221;

    The limo pulled up next to Melissa and her boyfriend Garth. She smiled and they both turned towards the mysterious intruder, she knew who it was immediately.

    &#8220;Melissa! I am so happy to see you! Ditch that dork and come ride with the Rock and Roller baby ya!!&#8221;

    Melissa laughed and covered her face. She apologized to Garth and got in the car. Garth would go on to become a successful carpenter in a company named Nailz n Boardz. They were an extreme carpentry service that took big risks while working, but why are we going on about Garth?

    &#8220;Melissa, you look incredible! How do you even go outside and not get married all over the place!?&#8221;

    &#8220;I just take one step at a time, Marky.&#8221; Melissa said sweetly, in her overly cute voice.

    &#8220;I don&#8217;t mean to intrude,&#8221;the driver intruded,&#8221;but due to a sudden construction delay in front of us, we will have to detour around Hempway St so we can connect back to the main road. It will take about ten extra minutes sir.&#8221;

    &#8220;Like I give five craps driver, save the road map show for boring people. Just drive man!&#8221;

    After a few moments of driving and chatting, the limo came to a stop. The driver continued to go on about detours and delays, but Mark didn&#8217;t care. The drive continued this way a few more times. Then the limo came to a stop in the middle of a baseball field.

    Mark scratched his head as he opened his window, he stuck his head out and looked around the outfield. &#8220;Lookin to get a quick game in driver?&#8221;

    A loud barking roar of an engine cut the silence of serene baseball field......


    Sheriff Kinrad and his new Detroit Police Sheriff Mega Car pulled to a stop right next to the Limo. Mark quickly tucked his head back in the car and put the window up. The large sheriff quickly got out of his car and slammed the door extra loud. He then walked over to the limo and tapped loudly on Mark&#8217;s window.

    &#8220;Yes?&#8221; Mark smiled nervously as his window opened.

    &#8220; Let me in the car boy ,&#8221; Kinrad seethed out of his teeth,&#8221; we need tuh have us a little chat yuh here? &#8221;

    Mark opened the door for the sheriff and the big man sat down roughly in his seat next to Norman Blip. The sheriff gave Norman an odd sideways look.,&#8221; Why in the southern fried chicken do yuh got wrasslin make up on guy? &#8221;

    &#8220;I have a ....&#8221;

    &#8220; Ya! Yuh got problems! Missa, I can&#8217;t believe you dumped a good ol boya like Garth for dis pile o crap here! &#8221;

    &#8220;Daddy! This is none of your business! You have to stop following me around! I can&#8217;t believe YOU rerouted us just to get us alone on this baseball field!&#8221;

    &#8220;Git out! Me n Mark are gunna have us a man tuh man.&#8221; Sheriff Kinrad stared at Mark and gave him an evil smirk.

    &#8220;No, I can do whatever I want. I&#8217;m not going anywhere.&#8221; Melissa grabbed Mark&#8217;s arm and hooked it with hers. &#8220;Whatever you say to Mark, you can say to me.&#8221;

    &#8220;Sir,&#8221; Mark gulped but his gulp was drowned out by massive, multiple thunderous rumblings coming from outside the limo. They all looked out of the limo windows, the sheriff quickly grabbed his sidearm and jumped out of the limo.

    The Wasteland Gang were here......


    The Wasteland Gang

    Led by Bart Gullopean A.K.A Bart Gullopean, former gimmick consultant for a popular clothing designer in Detroit. He took over The Boxing Gloves Gang when he inherited his uncle&#8217;s Mad Max collection when his uncle died. He transformed The Boxing Gloves Gang to The Wasteland Gang and have been terrorizing the rich people of Detroit ever since.

    &#8220;The rich people of Detroit!&#8221; Bart&#8217;s voice boomed out from his heavily modified S.U.V turned into half of a monster truck, with chains and spikes all over it. He stood on a raised platform with welded rails all around it. His gang surrounded the Limo in their Wasteland cars and trucks, all similar in deathly design.

    &#8220;You will die!&#8221;

    &#8220;Hold on a minute son!&#8221; Sheriff Kinrad called out, showing everyone he wasn&#8217;t armed, he took a half step towards his super squad car,&#8221;There ain&#8217;t no need for violence today! Nowa I don&#8217;t wanna be the one ta tell y&#8217;all this but, yuh know I&#8217;m the sheriff round these parts ya?&#8221;

    All of the Wasteland Gang booed and spit out heavily edited curse words.

    &#8220;The Authority protects the rich! Both will die today!&#8221; Bart Gullopean yelled in perfect clarity despite wearing his hockey mask. He did an extra boob flex just to show he was serious.

    &#8220;Mark! Follow my lead!&#8221; The Sheriff slapped the window of the limo and ran towards his Squad car, but he tripped and fell on his knees.

    &#8220;Oh lord liften jeeeeesuss criiiipes! Dat hurt!&#8221; The Sheriff held his knee and growled.

    All of the Wasteland Gang laughed loudly, most of them laughed like pirates.

    &#8220;Har har har haaarrrrrr!!&#8221; They laughed.

    &#8220;Damn sheriff! That was funny!&#8221; Bart announced to everyone.

    Sheriff Kinrad did a pathetic side military roll and crawled inside his super squad car, he fired up the engines and took off towards a hapless gang member on a small moped. The moped was decked out in spikes and chains , but that didn&#8217;t matter much as Kinrad smashed his way through sending the gang member flying off to one side. The limo driver took his cue and followed the sheriff out of the opening in the gang members that he made.

    &#8220;Melissa, baby. When I look into your eyes, I can see a love restrained....&#8221;

    &#8220;Mark,&#8221;she growled,&#8221;do you not notice what's happening around you?&#8221;

    &#8220;Ah - phooey -Melissa. What can I do about it? I&#8217;m stuck in this - gosh darn - PG mode I can&#8217;t get out of. Check it out.&#8221;

    Mark gave her the middle finger but it was pixelated again.

    &#8220;Oh that,&#8221; Melissa Kinrad looked around,&#8221; oh, here it is.&#8221; She found a big red button marked - R - and pressed it.....

    The Wasteland Gang gave chase and started opening fire at the back of the limo with machine guns and handguns. There were some missed Molotov cocktail shots as well that blew up on the road next to the limo.

    Mark Keaton slowly rose out of the roof of the limo on a mounted 50 caliber machine gun, &#8220;Hey fuckers! It&#8217;s killing time!&#8221;


    The huge gun gave a tremendous kick in his hands as he swung it wildly left and right, a pursuing gang car exploded immediately and rolled right over the car next to it, catching that car on fire. The result of the blast blew a female gang members shirt right off as she drove the car that was on fire now.

    &#8220;Hey! Nice boobs!&#8221; Mark shot the gun again and that car exploded and did a cartwheel on the road behind them.

    Bart roared, &#8220; Where is MY MUSIC!?!&#8221;

    &#8220;Sorry sir!&#8221; A wasteland gang member yelled, he grabbed a C.B and ordered the music caravan to meet them at the next intersection.

    &#8220;Yaaaaa !!!&#8221; Mark screamed as he unloaded more shots at The Wasteland Gang, a four wheeler quickly pulled up next to the Limo, a gang member unleashed a volley of fire from a makeshift flamethrower, Mark ducked just in time and landed on the floor of the limo. He patted his sleeve that caught fire.

    &#8220;This is Sheriff Kinrad, I need backup! Y&#8217;all here me?! Send all of it boy!!&#8221; The sheriff swerved as several bullets ticked off of his passenger door.

    The busy intersection was fast approaching, some major crashing was immanent....



    Detroit City Airport .....

    Justin Cooper calmly chewed his whole wheat bagel as he wheeled his bags out to the curb. They had retrieved his insanely expensive sunglasses from a nice looking stewardess who gave Cooper her number.

    &#8220;Like I was saying,&#8221; Iris continued as he stepped next to Cooper,&#8221;just get the kid away from the commentating table. Get him to focus on the ma....&#8221;

    They both stared in silence at what Mark Keaton had sent them for transportation. Cooper tossed his bagel on the ground, &#8220;Book a flight now, I&#8217;m done with this kid. There&#8217;s NO way I&#8217;m showing up to work out in THAT thing! We are going home Iris!&#8221;

    Cooper turned and started to storm back to the terminal when the multiple sounds of sirens and gunshots grabbed everyone&#8217;s attention, a huge wave of fire, smoke, cars, noise, sirens and action roared past them towards an intersection....Cooper nodded at the red - RMK- paint on the side of the limo. Iris shook his head in disappointment.

    &#8220;That&#8217;s it Iris. I&#8217;m not doing this anymore. He&#8217;s on his own, I&#8217;m on my own! I was happier alone anyway!&#8221;



    &#8220;We aren&#8217;t making this turn!&#8221; The driver announced over the intercom.

    &#8220;Brace yourself Melissa!&#8221; Mark yelled as he grabbed on to a handle on the roof. The limo skidded sideways and slammed hard into a bus stop, people dove out of the way just in time as the limo obliterated the entire stand sending glass and metal all over the place!


    &#8220;Keep going driver!&#8221; Mark roared, the driver peeled off of the grass and swerved back into the middle of the intersection narrowly avoiding other cars. A gang member rolled his modified pick up truck right over the area they had just crashed through. A huge caravan rolled right up behind them, the parade-like float was overflowing with huge speakers and a stage where a masked man was held on to a fire spitting electric guitar on bungee chords.

    &#8220;Play my pursuit music!!&#8221; Bart roared and pointed to the caravan, he then did an arm flex to show he was serious.

    The masked man on the stage geared up, he then played.....


    &#8220;Huh? What in the hell?&#8221; Mark immediately laughed despite the danger he was in.

    Several Wasteland cars swerved around the caravan followed by Detroit City cop cars, gun fire was exchanged back and forth between the cops and gang members, a cop was hit directly in the head and rolled his car violently in the middle of the street, another two cop cars smashed right into the wreckage causing a major explosion in the street.....


    A huge monster truck rammed right through a building close by and just missed the limo, the Wasteland gang member driving it lost control and rolled the truck onto the sidewalk into a park area.

    Another dirt covered gang member leaned out of his car window and shot a huge grappling hook gun at the limo, the shot smashed the window right by Mark&#8217;s head and the hook grappled the opposite window frame, smashing that window as well. Melissa screamed and covered her head.

    Sheriff Kinrad slammed on the breaks in his car and took out the car that shot the grappling hook. The hook tore out a huge chunk of metal and clanged its way right out of the window again. The hook rattled around in the Sheriffs tire and busted it in a loud pop and gray smoke. The sheriff lost control and slammed into the side of the limo, the limo immediately turned left and went right off of the road, ramped a curb then ripped through a grass area, it smashed through a fence then did a large ramp off of another grassy hill towards a big highway below.

    The Wasteland Gang were not shy in following all of the ramping. The Elton John playing caravan even made the jump in spectacular fashion. Dozens of cars on the highway slammed on their brakes as the chase ramped on the highway, smashing through the guardrail.

    &#8220;Stay here!&#8221; Mark ordered Melissa as he eyed a Wasteland motorcycle as it pulled up close behind the limo.

    &#8220;Damn, I was planning on going somewhere just now.&#8221; Melissa retorted.

    The motorcycle, full of twisted barbwire designs pulled right up to the side of the limo with an extremely ugly gang member riding it. The bald, scarred faced killer had a Molotov cocktail ready in his left hand. Mark quickly jumped out of the limo and drop kicked the gang member off of his bike. He quickly grabbed the handlebars and regained control of the motorbike. The gang member hit the pavement hard and the Molotov cocktail smashed right on his head at the same time. His twisted, burning body rolled back only to get run over by Bart&#8217;s SUV machine.

    &#8220;Hey Melissa!&#8221; Mark roared.

    She kept the window closed as bullets ricocheted off of the roof.

    &#8220;Open the window!&#8221;

    Melissa visibly cursed and opened the Limo window.

    &#8220;Check this out!&#8221; Mark did a wheelie and fist pumped the air, he then let go of the handles during the wheelie and played his air guitar.

    &#8220;Are you insane?! Oh my god! Never mind!&#8221; Melissa closed the window and started texting on her phone.

    Bart bumped the back of the motorcycle with his SUV machine making Mark fall back on the hood of the vehicle, the bike rolled off to the side. Mark quickly shuffled to his stomach, he then jumped up to the platform where Bart resided.

    He threw a punch at the leader, Bart grabbed Mark&#8217;s fist and held it. &#8220;You are way too weak to stand a chance against me!&#8221;

    Bart gave Mark a wicked backhand sending the rock and roller twisting in the air, he landed on the windshield of a police car next to Bart&#8217;s truck.

    Mark regained his composure and jumped back to the SUV, Bart threw another backhand but Mark ducked and punched the leader with a quick left and right to the hockey mask. Bart grabbed on to the welded railing and tried not to fall out. Mark continued to nail him with punches until a gang member grabbed Mark from behind in a choke hold.

    &#8220;Time to end this!&#8221; Bart announced then punched Mark hard in the stomach, he then grabbed him and body slammed him off of the SUV onto the roof of the Limo. Mark Keaton crashed right through the roof and landed on the floor in a big thud!

    &#8220;Oh,&#8221; Norman reacted mildly to Mark&#8217;s appearance,&#8221;havin some trouble there? See this magazine? It&#8217;s Walking Digest. Walking Mark. How exciting can walking be to read walking stories?&#8221;

    A Wasteland modified police car pulled up next to the Limo driver&#8217;s window, a gang member made the signal for the driver to roll down his window. The driver politely complied.

    &#8220;Thanks!&#8221; The scratchy voiced gang member yelled as he pointed a grenade launcher right at the driver.



    The Limo driver was obliterated, the entire roof of the limo blew right off and crashed on a police car behind the limo.

    &#8220;Did everyone see that?! That was fucking excellent!&#8221; Bart announced. The music caravan was starting to fall behind the pack. Bart ordered his driver to communicate that his music was starting to fade out.

    &#8220;What just happened?!&#8221; Norman asked with concern as his Walking Digest flew out of his hand and splatters of blood droplets hit his shirt.

    &#8220;We need to hire a new limo driver!&#8221; Mark yelled and smirked, he watched for Melissa&#8217;s reaction to his one liner but she was still texting on her phone.

    &#8220;Go Norman,&#8221;Mark pointed to the front of the car,&#8221;we can&#8217;t slow down! You need to get up there and drive dude!&#8221;

    Norman nodded, he leaned over the twisted metal and ripped fabric, several bullets twanged off the metal nearby and he yelped, he ducked back to safety near his seat.

    &#8220;For crying out loud!&#8221; Mark grabbed Norman and threw him over the wrecked metal to the front of the limo. Norman landed hard, face first into the dash next to the steering wheel. His painted nose hit the stereo button....


    &#8220;Aww shit! I hate this song!&#8221; Mark growled. A sword blade suddenly stuck into the seat in front of him with a loud thud. Another whizzed by his head and stuck in a nearby lamp post.

    &#8220;Like my sword gun?!&#8221; Bart asked, loudly.

    Another Wasteland truck rammed a police car behind the Limo and flipped it over, the car kept flipping right into a an innocent bystander&#8217;s Mazda 323, sending both cars crashing over the rail in a violent pile of wreckage.

    Two gang members on the truck rose up from the sides in specially made, mechanical seats with mini-guns right in front of them. They started opening fire on the limo, the orange spray from both guns was amazing.

    Mark grabbed Melissa and pulled her down close to the floor as bullets tore the heck out of the seats and surrounding metal. Another sword stuck right in the floor next to Mark&#8217;s head.

    &#8220;Hey, Mark! I can&#8217;t get any decent speed with this car!&#8221; Norman announced.

    &#8220;That&#8217;s nice Norman! Could you turn the channel on the radio?&#8221;

    &#8220;What channel?&#8221;

    Mark didn&#8217;t get to answer as a loud explosion rocked nearby and tossed the limo up in the air for a moment, Mark and Melissa were nearly thrown from the car.

    &#8220;Reload my bazooka! Did you hear that Mark? I said MY BAZOOKA!!&#8221; Bart announced as he handed his bazooka down to his subjects to be reloaded.

    Mark felt a sensation of a hand continuously rubbing at his man parts. He smirked and looked at Melissa, &#8220;Do you really think now is the time for this?&#8221;

    She wasn&#8217;t paying attention, she was furiously texting on her phone over by the torn up seats near the busted console.

    He looked down to see the mechanical console-hand had been shot off, but still operating on his junk.

    Bart was about to fire the Bazooka when he was hit in the head with a severed, mechanical hand, the bazooka round flew off into the sky.....


    Detroit Action News at 6 Special Helicopter......

    &#8220;People of Detroit, this is your eye in the sky Harry Ulport with Channel 6 News! We are following a massive car chase on I78 that connects to the bypass, it looks like most of the Detroit City Police are involved and The Wasteland Gang, they seem to be shooting at a ....&#8221;

    BOOOM!!! The helicopter exploded from the bazooka round.


    The back of the Limo was nothing but a chewed up mess now as the mini-gun, mechanical seat gang members continued to shoot at the limo. Time was quickly running out for Mark and his pals.

    &#8220;They shot the radio!&#8221; Norman announced.

    &#8220;Well, isn&#8217;t that just great!&#8221; Mark had found a square chunk of metal to use as a shield to cover them on the floor.

    &#8220;Give up, cowards!&#8221; Bart announced then shot his sword gun, it nailed the back tire of the limo. Now they were trailing bright orange sparks down the highway.

    Suddenly a black car roared past the entire pack and almost ran into the back of the transfer truck in front of them, it was a 1982 Pontiac Fire-bird Trans Am, jet black with a red translucent finish. The car had a wickedly evil mural of Alice Cooper&#8217;s face inside a huge fist the covered the entire hood of the car. The back tires were illegal racing tires that stuck out a half foot from the frame and it had two large exhaust pipes curling out under the rear doors, facing the back of the car.... THE REMARKAMOBILE.

    Grey smoke rose from the back tires as the car spun around in a 180. Justin Cooper held up a cassette tape and jammed it into the Kenwood stereo.



    Cooper sang along to the lyrics as he hit the -guns- button right under the stereo and the hood of the car opened like a book lying on it&#8217;s back. Two huge mini-guns rolled out next to each other. He opened fire immediately.

    A gang member&#8217;s car exploded right in front of Bart&#8217;s SUV death machine, the car did a back flip and landed right on the front of Bart&#8217;s truck.

    The driver of Bart&#8217;s truck swerved off and hit the brakes. The fire engulfed car flew off into the opposite lane and exploded violently with a bus that was cruising past. The Remarkamobile spun around again and slowed down to fall beside the truck that was still shooting at the Limo, Cooper swerved the car and crushed the seated gang member on the left side of the truck. The momentum of the collision caused the truck to veer to the right and crushed the other seated gang member violently on the guard rail.

    &#8220;That&#8217;s MY CAR! You better not scratch it Cooper!!&#8221; Mark jumped up and screamed, he shook Melissa&#8217;s arm and pointed to the Remarkamobile, he mocked holding out his hand for the tag.

    A Molotov cocktail exploded on the side of the limo and caught the car on fire. A police wasteland gang member&#8217;s car bumped the limo from the left and got tangled up in the twisted, shot up metal. Both cars caught fire. The passenger side window of the wasteland police car exploded and a rough looking gang member jumped out. He attempted an overhand left at Keaton but got back body dropped right out of the car, Cooper ran over the gang member in a crunch.

    &#8220;Gross.&#8221; He muttered.


    Cooper was hammered from behind by Bart&#8217;s SUV, the momentum sent the Remarkamobile crashing right into the back of the limo, the crash separated the police gang car from the limo and it crashed into the guard rail on the left and flipped high into the air, it nailed an overhead highway sign and stuck right in it.

    The force of the truck and car bent the back of the limo, Mark grabbed Melissa and they jumped to the front as metal and fabric stuck out all over the seats, the fire was getting worse.

    &#8220;We&#8217;re probably going to explode.&#8221; Norman smiled calmly.

    &#8220;Move!&#8221; Mark rudely threw Norman towards Melissa and grabbed the steering wheel.

    Mark looked behind them and watched Bart shoot his sword gun at Cooper and ram the back of his car.

    &#8220;Go! Run to the Remarkamobile! Git to da choppa!&#8221; Mark pointed.

    Melissa and Norman jumped over the fire and wreckage, Cooper folded back in the massive mini-guns on the hood then they jumped on the hood of the car, Cooper helped them both get in, Melissa hopped in the back seat next to two impaled swords. Norman let out a big sigh as he plopped down in the passenger seat.

    &#8220;Why are you wearing wrestling paint?&#8221; Cooper asked him as the driver behind them opened fire with an AK-47 assault rifle.

    Mark stood up in the driver&#8217;s seat of the limo, he turned and gave Cooper a knowing look. Cooper nodded, Mark yanked the wheel and ran as fast as he could, jumping over twisted wreckage and fire, he jumped on the hood of the Remarkamobile and slid in next to Norman.

    Cooper pulled hard and squealed the car to the right out of the way of the limo that skidded sideways. Bart&#8217;s SUV smashed right into the side of it. The limo broke right in half as Bart&#8217;s SUV kept on going.

    &#8220;Well,&#8221; Mark looked behind them,&#8221;I thought that would stop the dude.&#8221;

    &#8220;I&#8217;d like to introduce myself.&#8221;

    &#8220;Not now Norman, do you not take in your surroundings or what?&#8221;


    Bart&#8217;s SUV nailed them again from behind and Cooper momentarily lost control, they veered hard to the right and slammed into a Dodge Viper. The Viper hit the guard rail then ramped, it hit a large concrete pillar holding up the overpass and did a violent spinning helicopter movement in the air right over The Remarkamobile. It exploded on impact with the pavement and continued to roll next to them on the left side of the highway.

    &#8220;I like those kinds of cars.&#8221; Cooper commented.

    &#8220;Ya, very mean looking eh? Nice sunglasses by the way. Very Prince Edward Island.&#8221;


    Bart&#8217;s SUV plowed through The Viper wreckage and slammed into the side of their car again, they hit the guard rail and slammed into the them again, sending sparks and smoke flying all over the place.

    &#8220;Norman, take the wheel.&#8221;

    &#8220;Agh. Again?&#8221; He complained calmly.

    &#8220;Melissa,&#8221; Mark puffed out his chest heroically, &#8220;stay here.&#8221;

    &#8220;Oh shut up.&#8221; She continued texting.

    Cooper and Keaton both climbed on to the roof of the Remarkamobile.

    &#8220;FOOLS! Don&#8217;t you see that you&#8217;ve got NO CHANCE! NO CHANCE THAT&#8217;S WHAT YOU&#8217;VE GOT!!&#8221; Bart screamed and pointed, he did a quick shoulder flex to prove he was serious.

    &#8220;Time to amp it up.&#8221; Cooper said and made a fist.

    &#8220;That&#8217;s right dude.&#8221; Keaton made a fist in Cooper&#8217;s direction.

    &#8220;Unrealistic Powers Combine!!&#8221;
    &#8220;Unrealistic Powers Combine!!&#8221;

    They said at the same time and clashed fists together, suddenly their eyes glowed a bright green.

    They both summoned up energy and shot a huge Hoduken fire ball at the SUV !!!



    The fire ball hit the SUV but barely made the vehicle swerve.

    &#8220;Well, shit. That was a waste of time.&#8221; Mark laughed, he then jumped and did a front flip and landed on Bart&#8217;s SUV next to the masked leader. Cooper landed next to him, they jumped into a fighting stance.

    &#8220;Hyper uppercut!&#8221; Bart roared and punched the hell out of both of them, they struggled just to stay on the top of the landing, with welded rails.

    Mark patted himself.

    &#8220;Not a good time for a smoke Mark!&#8221;

    &#8220;Ty Burna!!!&#8221;

    A candle roared to life on the floor of the landing, Mark lit a smoke, then flicked it at Bart&#8217;s eye socket in his mask.

    &#8220;Not bad, but this might be a little more effective.&#8221; Cooper picked up Bart&#8217;s sword gun and started laying into Bart with shot after shot. One final shot to the head sent the leader back flipping off of the SUV, he bounced on the highway and the swords sticking out of him sent sparks everywhere. He caused an accident with a motorcyclist who rolled it after running over the Wasteland leader, a camper squealed and skidded over his body , smearing his guts all over the highway. Hours later, seagulls would land and eat his guts, only to be run over by motorists trying to get home after a long day at work. The seagull guts would cause the motorists to lose control and roll their car next to a discarded hockey mask that sat unused in the asphalt.

    Mark Keaton and Justin Cooper walked in slow motion through the thick black smoke of destruction and chaos that the chase left behind on the highway....


    Melissa smiled and walked up to Mark.

    &#8220;Baby, you are coming home with me, no questions asked.&#8221;

    &#8220;I&#8217;d love to Mark!&#8221; Melissa sighed loudly.

    &#8220;Not you creep, the caravan. Look at the speakers on that baby! ROCK AND ROLL!!&#8221; Mark ran off towards the abandoned caravan overloaded with speakers.


    Three Hours later ........

    The Remarkamobile pulled up the the curb on the pleasant smelling Eastside Street. A rich neighborhood with quiet streets, clean yards and polite cops. Mailmen were damn polite too.

    Mark Keaton kicked open the door, he still had his burnt, ripped jacket on. His blackened, soot covered face smiled when he held the letter in the air. The letter he was about to mail to his parents in Colorado. The same place where the mystery man is from.

    &#8220;What did you say?&#8221; Mark asked me, sometimes I have a big mouth.

    Nothing Mark, just mail that letter.


    Mark jammed the letter at the mailbox, but the letter wouldn&#8217;t go in. He tried to find a seam he could jam the letter in but couldn&#8217;t find one. He examined all around the back of the box and continued to try and cram the letter in crevices and dials.

    &#8220;You&#8217;re repeated attempts at putting paper inside me have failed, please discontinue and move on or you will be destroyed.&#8221; S.H.I.T said, seemingly annoyed.

    Mark got back inside his car, &#8220;Post office sure has a screwy way of dealing with customers now-a-days.&#8221;

  22. Ty Burna

    Ty Burna Getting Noticed By Management

    Oct 27, 2007
    Likes Received:
    The scene opens to a simple room, no dimmed lights. No darkness. No fire. Just a simple table with Ty Burna sitting across from WZCW interviewer Stacy Madison. Ty is buttoned up in a suit, a bandage on his head from the war he just went through at Gold Rush. His hands are folded in front of him, a calm demeanor on his face. Stacy sits with her legs crossed, a notepad in front of her.

    Stacy: I'm here with WZCW Hall of Famer Ty Burna. Ty, you requested this interview time, though you didn't say why. Care to elaborate why we're here?

    Ty: Well Stacy, I've come to the conclusion that creativity has no more room in WZCW. Everything is so buttoned up and sterile that those that come up with unique ideas with a new style is found to be not in line with WZCW policy. Fuck it let's just get right out and say it. The Ty Burna that everyone loves, the fans love, that supposedly draws, doesn't sit well with the powers that be in WZCW. It's not the company I helped make great. I've watched as the soul of WZCW, the very essence of this god damn company get erased like a simple eraser board. Well they've finally broken me. El Califa has left the company for places that suit his style more. They've lost a fine wrestler who brought an intriguing idea to this business, and they discarded him like it's nothing. I no longer have a tag team partner and I will no longer be competing in the tag team division.

    Stacy looks puzzled by Ty's comments as she furiously writes things down. She takes the pen and bites on the end gently, unsure of what is going on.

    Stacy: What do you mean by they've broken you? And El Califa has left the company?

    Ty simply nods, his posture not moving as his eyes gaze forward, a blank look in them.

    Ty: That is correct Stacy. El Califa has received an offer for a company that will better suit his capabilities. It is a shame, but it is what it is. But the fact remains, it appears that my promos as of late have not been in the taste of the writers in the back. While I do own Creative Control in my contract, it is clear that if I continue as I am, I will see my legacy as a hall of famer erode very swiftly. And so there will be no more Chaos, there will be no more blood. These eyes will remain green. My family will no longer be apart of my promos. The dark robes, the broken skulls, the mythical domain I come through upon, it is all gone. I will no longer be the Harbinger of Chaos or the King of Darkness. I will from this point forward be simply known as Ty Burna. No more wild adventures. No more torture, just no more. They may write me as a blank canvas for all I give a damn anymore. The gimmick has become a hindrance to my career, and I simply refuse to act in it anymore.

    Stacy: But why now? I realize you are angry after your loss to Justin Cooper and Mark Keaton, this seems like a knee jerk reaction to it.

    Ty: I can understand that people may think that is the case. But I have had these thoughts to shed the gimmick for some time and simply return to being the best. Perhaps I fail as a simple man, I have shown in my career I am not afraid to take risks. Unfortunately said risks seem to go over the head of people that do not take the time to follow through the storyline process. I once owned this company Stacy, and in that time I allowed characters of all types to run wild with their creativity. Now we live in an era of checklists and interviews. So that is what I will be if it means keeping my career going. Simple questions and answers. So please, continue Stacy. What is your next question?

    Stacy: what is next for Ty Burna? Will you chase championship gold once more?

    Ty: Perhaps, perhaps not. As of now I am not medically cleared for at least three weeks. In the mean time I will be going on vacation, and if the company burns to the ground, then so be it. I will not shed a tear. Mr. Banks wants to run this company like a proper business, and not a wrestling company. He has no idea what it takes to read between the lines. Everything is so black and white it makes me sick. I have been the anti hero, I have been the greatest evil. I have been to heaven and hell and back. I guess that is all I was good for anymore was to put myself through hell just to rise up, only to fall down once more to the evil character they expect me to be. Well the cycle breaks right fucking now. I will become what they want everyone to be. If I fail, then it will not be on me. If they become disinterested with a vanilla character, then do not blame me, blame it on all those that want everything squeaky clean and easy to understand. They wish to appeal to simpletons, well then I shall join them in that quest. Next question.

    Stacy looks around, as if waiting for the Ty she's known for so long to come out, the calm in his voice almost unnerving to her. Ty yawns as he crosses his arms, casting his eyes down for a moment as if becoming disinterested in this interview.

    Stacy: You speak vaguely about people. Is there anyone in particular you are calling out here.

    Ty: No one in particular. I will not name names. There is no need, they know who they are. Banks is the only one worth mentioning anyway.

    Stacy: You realize that these comments are worthy of a fine and a suspension? That you are slamming the very company you work for on a very personal level by calling out management.

    Ty's eyes darts up as Stacy flinches, leaning back a bit as if expecting Ty to get right up in her face as he had done so many times before. Instead he simply shrugs, his arms remaining crossed over his chest.

    Ty: Like I give a damn. I had enough money to buy this company, I'll do it again if I have to. They can fine me, suspend me, whatever. My lawyer can take care of all that for me. Needless to say I've invested far more money into this company that was never paid back to me then I care to admit to. I don't take a dime from merchandise sales Stacy, do you know that? I did that because every penny reinvested into WZCW, I felt was the better. Most guys are pissed about only getting twenty percent, Stacy if I got twenty percent of my sales, I would start my own damn company with that money alone and WZCW would be cutting their budget at a very rapid rate. I'm not bitter, again I have more than enough money to retire and not do a damn thing but sit on the beach for the rest of my life. I don't need to hang around as a special commentator, or be a non wrestling character on screen. I don't need to be a road agent or help with booking. Hell maybe I'll go to Hollywood and outdo Titus and his five Oscars or whatever he's up to now. Or I write a tell all book that puts this company to shame. Whatever price I ask, is what I get paid simply put. In the end all these titles mean fuck all anymore. I see that very clearly now. While I will protect my legacy, I will line my pockets with even more money, and if they don't want to pay that price, then I will simply put Banks out of business. Maybe then the essence of this company will get resurrected, but until then, here I am, plain old Ty Burna, no, Tyrone Blades. Wrestler. Pants and black tape around the wrist. No logos, no nothing. I show up, I wrestle, I get paid, I leave. Simple as that.

    Stacy: A lot to digest there Ty, though I imagine Mr. Banks will have something to say about this.

    Ty: I fully anticipate he will, and I still won't give a damn what that corporate suit has to say.

    Stacy: I think we'll wrap this up. You have heard it here first, Ty Burna...

    Ty: Tyrone Blades Stacy. Ty Burna is dead.

    Stacy: Er.... Tyrone Blades with some very biting words for WZCW. Any last comments?

    Ty: None at all. No wait, I have something. My next opponent is bad, and I will beat him. Am I doing this right?

    Stacy: Uh....I think you have the general idea.

    Ty: Excellent, I am already adapting to this vanilla idea. This has been therapeutic Stacy thank you.

    Ty stands up and holds his hand out as Stacy watches him warily. She reaches out slowly and shakes his hand, closing her eyes and flinching once more as a genuine smile forms on Ty's face. He nods his head to her and turns and walks away as the scene fades away.
  23. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    WZCW Merchandise will never be the same again..... - Dan RMK fan

    Wearing this improved my life ten fold. - Another RMK fan.

    NOW AVAILABLE at WZCW.COM SHOP ZONE - slash merchandise, slash org, slash slash. com...

    The Remarkable leather jacket from Remarkable Mark Keaton's clothing line, it will change your life....dude....



    Worn briefly by RMK himself, the leather jacket features, pockets, zippers and a kick ass attitude. WIFI not yet available.

    For $299.99 you too can be cool as hell.
  24. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Detroit Central Hospital - 5 Days after Gold Rush

    Mark Keaton was recovering from his horrible fall at Gold Rush. His injuries included deeply bruised ribs, stretch knee ligaments and minor bruising everywhere else. He kept leaving the hospital early thinking he could overcome it with his own private nurses, but it just wasn't a good idea and here he was, back in the DCH again.

    Today he only got one visitor though, Mayor of Detroit Trench Gaston came to visit him. He had a camera crew with him and presented Mark with the mask of Tiger Thunder Dragon King. TTDK was a former legend in wrestling from the 70s. Only wrestling fans in Mexico and Detroit knew of his amazing career.


    Remarkable Mark Keaton promised Trench Gaston that he would add it to his move set.
  25. Jeff Deliverer of Mail

    Jeff Deliverer of Mail Money for nothin, chicks for free
    E-Fed Mod

    Jun 15, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Unused RP written before the Goldrush PPV...

    It was a cold and stormy night, the wind pulled and pushed at the tree branches and they scraped their tree nails across the siding of Mark Keaton’s apartment. The power flickered and Norman took another drink of his whiskey. His wrestling face paint smeared as the buzz got worse and he started to sweat.

    “Yahtzee!” Mark Keaton jumped in the air and did a fist pump, he spilled his beer in the process. He had won again, but in reality, it was Norman who kept his client happy and let him win....they were playing Monopoly.

    Norman stood up and poured himself another glass of whiskey in the kitchen, he quickly stole a spoon while he was there. Mark lit up a smoke and searched the living room for his VHS tape he had made for WZCW management.

    “I found it, man!” Mark held up the tape so Norman could see, Mark staggered over to the VCR and struggled to enter the tape in it for awhile, after a moment of near misses, the VHS tape entered the VCR.

    “Uh, ya. I like that.” The VCR moaned.

    The VHS tape was the taped porno WZCW management wanted from Mark Keaton just in case he ever got injured. They also sent him a large poster with the WZCW logo that he could hang in the background. After a moment of warnings of copyright, a quick jingle of Mark Keaton’s music played and Remarkable Mark Keaton stepped into the frame, he was wearing his Van Halen T-shirt and blue jeans.

    “When are you going to throw that raggy shirt out?” Norman spat out as he sat on the couch.

    “Shush dude! Mark Keaton is about to start his taped promo!” Mark took a swig of his beer and sat back.

    “Did you notice it said - porno- in that last paragraph?”

    On the television, Mark Keaton pointed right at the screen, he had a sneer on his face, “Listen all you little goody two shoes! My name is Remarkable Mark Keaton! Make sure you spell it right when you’re taking your little hand computers and using the typewriter thingy to tell your pals that Mark Keaton is on the boob tube! Coming NEXT WEEK I’ll be taking on El Caido’s Dragon in a....”

    - PAUSE -

    “Oh yuh,” Mark blinked as he held the pause button on the remote, “this is the promo for next week, not the general..The genetic, uhh, the normal one, the normal one they wanted me to make. Phew! That’s the one on the other tape dude. That’s the geriatric one, the...”

    “The German one. (Burp!) The German one Mark, that’s the word your looking for.”

    “Yaaa!” Mark pointed right at Norman’s face, “the jerky one. The one where shit happens all over the place man! Y’know man!?”

    “It’s way better right?”

    “Whatever Norm! Woo! Let’s keep this show runnin.”


    “ On one match! Y’know all you dirtbags out there in T.Vland are probably saying to yourself, - Hey, self! Why do I SUCK so bad?! - Baa ha ha ha ! Anyway, your probably sayin - but Mark Keaton is in a tag team! Why is he fighting on his own?! He’ll never win!- bullcrap I won’t win! I’m gonna take that dragon and rip his wings off! Then he’ll be draggin himself all over the place! But you see, HEY CAMERA MAN! ZOOM IN FOR THIS!! You see, I’m on a single match mission people. I’m on a single match mission because this is my FIRST...EVER...MATCH on my own! I’m going to take away something incredibly important to that dragon guy. Your probably thinking, he’s going to have sex with Dragon’s girlfriend right in the ring, right in front of Dragon and taunt him while he’s doing it. No, no you sicko. I’m not doing that. Your probably thinking, he’s going to smuggle in a gun to the ring and shoot Dragon and hope the ref doesn’t notice, not that either sicko! What the hell is wrong with you people? No, what I’m going to do is even WORSE THAN THAT. I’m going to wear down the Dragon during the match then TAKE HIS MASK OFF! Ha ha ha haaa! The whole world will see his ugly face for the first time ever! He’ll be so preoccupied with his stupid mask that I’ll pin him 1,2,3 while he’s crying in the middle of the ring. El Caido’s Dragon! You will be beaten, and LAY at the feet of REMARKABLE MARK KEATON!”

    - END OF TAPE -

    “See Normo,”Mark blinked, “that guy said he’s gonna take uhh, he’s gonna take that guy’s mask off.”

    Norman was asleep at his end of the couch.

    “Wimp. Go home man. When did you go to sleep anyway? Dude?” Mark’s eyes got heavy and eventually he was out as well.


    NEXT DAY ....

    Mark sat in the living room, he was drinking coffee, Norman sat at his end of the couch, also drinking coffee and watching Mark Keaton’s latest movie in the Random RP Thread, MAD MARK - THE ROAD BARBARIAN -----

    “Why does it have to be in Oregon? Do you even have any plans where we’re gonna stay at man?”

    “Yes,” Norman slowly stood up and grabbed a duffel bag, he pulled out a bright blue laptop with a Smurfette sticker on the back, “I have a guy who knows this great place in Oregon where we can stay in style, it’s also cheap!”

    “What gives man?” Mark nodded at the laptop, “you steal that thing off one of your kids or what?”

    “I bought it originally, so technically it’s mine. Anyway, the hotel is called The Oregon Hotel. It has some great reviews.”

    “The Oregon Hotel, what a winning name.”

    “Here Mark, check out the reviews of the hotel...” He spun the laptop towards Mark so he could read them......

    Excellent stay  :
      I rated this hotel five out of five stars. At first, I thought it was just a regular hotel, then I discovered a warp hole near the laundry room.  It took me to a world of cartoonish wonder.  I met talking ducks, dastardly pirates and food that sang and danced.  Just be warned, when you eat the singing food they don’t like it.  
                                              Peter Y.  

    So much cheese, a cheese paradise. 
           I brought a bunch of cheese with me to this hotel. 
                                                    B. Jergen.  

    Clean beds and covers,  
              I just had to leave a positive review!  I just stayed here at The Oregon Hotel and I must say it was a fine establishment.  I’ve never had so much fun sleeping before! The covers were so clean I could eat off of them and the pillows were soft! 

      Rhonda V.  

    Enormous amounts of sex,  
                This Hotel is perfect for having sex!  It has beds and a bar, plus it has pillows and a shower in the bathroom!  Me and my wife went here and we just went at it for hours.  I rammed her like a stallion ramming his woman stallion girlfriend, horse whatever you call them.   We did it missionary, doggystyle and a new position I’m still trying to get my head around, I was standing and holding her hands while she hung under me, it was weird, anyway, we were only interrupted once by the owner walking right in and asking to take pictures.    At one point we were slamming each other so hard we went through the wall into the next room, it was hilarious!  
                                              Joe T.  


    NEXT DAY - 11 AM , was it Friday? I’m not even sure now.

    Mark and Norman arrived in Oregon by airplane, stuff happened in the airplane but it wasn’t important enough to mention it here. Perhaps someday there will be a deleted scenes section and you could experience the long plane ride there, but for now, let’s just shut up because they are pulling up to The Oregon Hotel in a rented car.

    Mark and Norman jumped out of the car and grabbed their luggage, they took in the massive hotel in front of them. The Oregon Hotel was a huge, successful hotel that stretched into the sky. Built in the late 1950’s, The Oregon Hotel has had three main owners and has....well, let’s just move on. Who really gives a fuck about the history of this place.

    “Ha ha ha! Aw sometimes I just love you Jeff.” Mark smiled and gave me a thumbs up.

    “Who are you talking to?” Norman looked around, he was baffled as to why Mark was talking to the air.

    “Nobody, just go get us settled man.” Mark shook his head. What a guy eh Mark? Won’t mind his goddamn business.

    “O.K, Jeff,” Mark gave me a dirty look, “enough is enough dude.”

    25 Minutes Later ...........ROOM 323

    They entered their spacious hotel room, located on the tenth floor. It had a large bathroom, a television, two large beds and dressers plus a mini bar and kitchen. Norman was putting his stuff away while Mark explored the mini bar.

    “Damn, we just drank the other day. You have a match coming up in twenty four hours, don’t touch any of that stuff.”

    “O.K.” Mark agreed, while twisting open a beer and chugging it down.

    After a few minutes of talking about the tag team, his opponent coming up tomorrow and Ty Burna, they agreed it was time for some grub.

    “Go get some KFC. I haven’t had that stuff in like weeks man. Get it done.” Mark clapped and pointed at the door.

    “Nice healthy choice.” Norman muttered as he threw on his coat, he slammed the door and the room fell silent.

    A tiny tune of Electric Avenue blurted out from Mark’s pocket, he was using Norman’s cell phone. Well, probably his kid’s phone, knowing Norman.

     COOPER Sup MarkYou get to Oregon yet?  

    It was a text message from Cooper. Mark started to panic a little, it was his first ever experience texting.

    KEATON Yeswe just got in at this ducking hostel called Oregano Hostel man.  What the duck?  This stupid phone is changing my words.  
    COOPER YaI’ve stayed there beforeIt’s a nice placeThere’s rumors on the VineLine that you have been talking about taking Dragon’s mask off?  

    KEATON Ya JesusI’m going to embroider that son of a butch tomorrow.  Once I Pullovers his mark he....DUCK!  Just call me
    COOPER -  I can’tI’m doing important things right now.  I’ll talk to you later.  See you

    KEATON -  Whenever

    Mark biffed the phone on the kitchen counter. It hit the counter, slid and bounced off of the wall. Mark stared at it, something wasn’t right. There was something really off suddenly. The phone made no noise when it hit the counter, slid and bounced off of the wall. He felt like he was in a strange sound vacuum all of a sudden. He looked down at his hands and sound.

    He yelled, “Hello?” But the sound never escaped his mouth. He stomped around the room and tried to make noise but there was nothing. He started to panic a little. The phone by the bed suddenly rang extremely loud, all of the sound returned at once and Mark nearly fell to the floor.

    “Ring!” The phone said, impatiently.

    Mark composed himself and as calmly as he could, he picked up the receiver to his ear. “Talk to me.”

    “What did you want at KFC, you didn’t tell me.”

    “Just get chicken for crap sakes dude. It’s KFC, there’s nothing much else to get at the place known for chicken. Hurry up too, something weird just happened here.”

    “Like what?”

    “Nothing,” Mark suddenly felt like he wasn’t alone in the room, his eyes darted back and forth seeing if any shadows would quickly hide, “I’ll tell you when you come back, just step it up a little.”


    Mark hung up the phone, it didn’t feel right again. Talking on the phone was his only comfort, now the silence of the room returned. The only thing making any miniscule noise was a slight ticking from the wall clock. He slowly sat on the bed and listened hard for any new noises.


    What was that? Mark thought, it sounded like whispering, but from across the room somewhere. He sat perfectly still and tried to hear the noise again.

    Just the small ticking from the clock.

    Is that time right? Is it really 8:30 PM already?

    The ticking slowly melted away and he really couldn't hear it anymore, water dripping from the bathroom sink replaced the ticking.

    Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

    I’m not going to stand in front of that mirror and turn that tap tight.

    Drip. Drip.

    Somebody really should though, I’ll never be able to sleep with that dripping noise.


    Ya, I’ll put a stop to that.

    Mark stood up from the bed and took a step towards the bathroom, but the dripping stopped. He stood in one spot on the carpet, scared to move any further as the silence returned.

    DAMN! Get a hold of yourself man!

    Mark shook his head and arms and let out a loud laugh.

    A tiny Electric Avenue tone went off from the floor behind the kitchen counter. He walked over to the kitchen, he picked up the dark purple cell phone off of the tile floor, there was a new text message.

    NOT EAK -  words my changing is phone stupid This
    “What? Is this a normal error for these things?” Mark turned the phone off and placed it on the counter.

    The Electric Avenue tone went off and vibrated the phone on the counter.

    A kitchen chair scrapped loudly on the tile floor behind Mark and slid across the kitchen. Mark quickly ran to the room entrance and yanked on the doorknob. It was locked, the ringtone continued on the counter and the dripping and ticking started up as well.

    “Tell me this is some kind of joke!” Mark yelled at nobody. He stayed close to the room entrance and waited for everything to stop. Eventually it did. The phone died and the dripping and ticking stopped.

    He could hear approaching footsteps in the hall coming towards his room. He looked through the eye hole and waited to see Norman come into sight. He waited longer as the footsteps neared, they got louder and louder and Mark couldn’t believe that nobody came into view yet.....

    He felt a finger tap his left shoulder twice from behind. His knees got weak and he nearly fell to the floor. A shiver ran right through his organs, he didn’t want to turn around to see who tapped his shoulder.

    “O.K,” Mark breathed out hard, “take a breath. It’s just ghosts man. It’s just ghosts. Let’s just take it easy, they can’t hurt you.” He stayed facing the door, he didn’t want to turn around and he didn’t want to look in the eye hole either. He stood there for another ten minutes in terrified silence. He slowly looked over his shoulder and saw nothing there. He walked over to one of the beds and sat on it.

    10:45 PM

    WHAT? Why is the time going SO FAST?! Where the hell did Norman get KFC at, Canada?

    His bed suddenly jerked forward and lifted right up at the foot until it nearly touched the ceiling, Mark rolled off of the bed backwards, the bed slammed down hard on the floor.

    “Hey, shhhh! Trying.....trying to sleep...ARGGGH! Me MATEYS!”

    Mark scrambled around the covers and pushed pillows out of his way to try and see where the voices were coming from, the other bed suddenly flipped and corkscrewed right over him and slammed into the wall by the entrance sending pillows and covers landing on him.

    “Ooooh! ARGH! Did DAT sound like a SCARY ghost voice me Mateys?”

    “What the hell?!” Mark shot up off of the floor to see a flickering ghost over by the minibar. It was a pirate who obviously died from a cannon shot right through the back.
    The pirate picked up a bottle of whiskey and drank it, but it just splashed on the floor.

    “Hey! That’s an expensive bottle of whiskey dude!” Mark yelled in a type of hysteria.

    The Pirate Ghost jumped back and took out his jagged Cutlass Sword... Music suddenly swelled and Mark felt it was extremely important that he defeats this ghost suddenly.....


    Pirate Ghost used - SWIPE -

    Mark Keaton lost 105 HP. Mark watched in horror as the numbers bounced off of him, it was a powerful attack.

    Mark Keaton used - PUNCH -

    0 HP fell from the Pirate, it laughed heartily as Mark fell through him.

    Norman walked into the room, “What the hell is going on here?”

    Pirate Ghost used -ICE ATTACK 3 - on Norman.

    Ice pellets slammed into Norman’s painted face and he lost 85 HP.

    Norman Blip used - KFC GREASE - on Pirate Ghost.

    The Pirate Ghost flinched and lost 150 HP.

    Norman Blip used - KFC CHICKEN LEG- on Pirate Ghost

    The Pirate Ghost dodged the attack!

    Mark Keaton used - INSULTS - on Norman Blip!

    “What the heck Mark? Attack the ghost!”

    The Pirate Ghost used - SWIPE- on Mark Keaton!


    Norman Blip used -KFC FRENCH FRIES - on Pirate Ghost!

    “Stop wasting all the KFC man!”

    The Pirate Ghost exploded!!

    Norman and Mark celebrated with fist pumps. They earned 100 EXP.

    Mark learned -TEXT SKILLS -

    “Alright,” Mark said as he grabbed his luggage, “let’s get out of this place.”

    Fade to dark blue.

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