Sam's Thread of Chattin' w/ Jake & Other Robust Subjects

[Tastycles]

It anybody scores, I'll finally go to the doctors about my back trouble.

I hope you went to see the doctor 5 times.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I see what you did there.

 

[Mr. TM]

Sam, I reported a post, what is your rule on it?

 

[X]

I see what you did there.

No Samuel. There will be no Bawxy talk.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

I hope you didn't comment on the football, NorCal. Imagine him talking about NFL and getting everything wrong. That's how you would've sounded. How I would've sounded, come to think of it.

I'm currently living in this:

It's like The Day After Tomorrow, only not a crap film.

I asked him who I should like in football, and he told me there are only two teams that matter, Man U, and Man city. and "I fookin HATE Man City!!" So. I guess I like Man U.

He told me to call sexy ladies "fit birds" that was fun too.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Fuck Manchester and their football.

 

[Dave]

Hi Sam. Are you watching Match Of The Day?

 

[Uncle Sam]

No. Arsenal drew with Everton 2-2.

 

[Dave]

Yeah, I watched it. I think it was a fair result, to be honest.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Pfft, I don't really give a shit. All I know is Charlton are third in League One. Useless *****.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

So, for my last month on the moon, my bunk mate was from Manchester, no shit. He applied for RAF but they werent taking new people, so he went to America, became a citizen, and joined our military. We watched Man U a lot. Im sure he was miserable, living with me.

Terrible accent on those *****.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I was watching some advert for some shit new show with Paddy McGuinness where they ask kids questions and they give stupid answers. Two of the kids had Northern accents and I'd be lying if I didn't think to myself "Well, no wonder they're so stupid."

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Northerners all think you Southern fairies sound like Danny Dyer, which makes me think that we're all stupid.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I know it needn't be said, but Danny Dyer's a massive cunt.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

I quite like him, but I see all those grim ***** on 'Enders.

Ego by The Saturdays is my favorite pop ditty of the moment.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I'll have to look that up. Currently I'm eating microwave popcorn. It's quite nice, actually.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

I've got a popcorn maker, it's cheaper in the long run.

Work is about to start on my extension, the new DVD house, it's gonna be awesome.

 

[Uncle Sam]

For some reason, I just blew into the popcorn bowl. Now there's fucking popcorn everywhere.

Wish I had a DVD house.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

For some reason, I just blew into the popcorn bowl. Now there's fucking popcorn everywhere.

That's the problem with the maker, it get's it everywhere. But I have a clean kitchen floor and the children don't know any different.

Wish I had a DVD house.

I'll post a picture once it's done, it's going to be ace. No widows as I don't want light to fade the covers, a door from my room that that one, it's going to look very seedy.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Oh. I have blinds.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

In the current room they're in I filled in the window, which I'll have to sort out once I make it into a bedroom. Otherwise I'll have a deathly pale child. Although she's already deathly pale so I might not bother.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Seedy is always the way to go, if there is a decision to be made

 

[Y 2 Jake]

I'm a seedy guy, so I may as well just embrace it. It's not done me any harm before. Although a room full of DVDs that leads on from my bedroom is very geeky. I might have to change my bedroom so I can maintain my cool with the fairer sex.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Not caring about being cool is the coolest thing there is to them. Being aloof is the sexiest thing. Unfortunately, someone who is aloof generally doesnt even have sex either. Vicous cycle.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Bought Anti-Christ as well, Sam. It's a proper film with some real sex in it so it should be boring.