Glass Ass: The OFFICIAL JGlass Thread

[JGlass]

While I'm having a somewhat absurdist night between the short film I shared with you all and my planned booking for WZCW, I figured I might as well share this story that my bartending teacher told us today during class.

My teacher was setting up the bar at a club she both bartended and booked live bands for at around 5:00 before anyone was coming in. As she was setting up her stuff, a middle aged man walked in with a large, stuffed garbage bag and started moving all the stools away right in front of where my teacher was opening up. He then moves into the center of that area and pulls a sleeping bag out from his garbage bag and starts rolling himself up in it. He follows this up by wrapping himself up in a thick, thick rug, complete with a hood that has holes for his eyes and a slit for his nose and mouth so he can breath.

My teacher asks, "Excuse me sir, can I help you with anything?"

He responded, "Yes. You can step on me."

"Excuse me?"

"You can step on me."

"Look dude, I gotta set up here, I'm not going to step on you."

And so he laid there in front of the bar as my teacher continued to set up. However, as customers started to come in people started to step on this guy more and more and more until there were a bunch of girls in pointy high heeled boots jumping up and down on him, rocking out to the heavy metal band that was booked that night... and he was getting off on it the whole time.

My first thought was, "How does someone get to be like that," which I wondered out loud to the rest of the class. Nobody even ventured a guess, but my teacher said that she asked him when he realized he wanted to do this with his life. His answer was, "Since a very young age."

Here's his Facebook. She told us how to get there, I'm not THAT creepy.

http://www.facebook.com/GeorgioCarpet

Oh, and here's an article about him. In the New York Times...

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/14/fashion/14carpet.html?_r=2&scp=1&sq=georgio carpet&st=cs&

 

[CH David]

Holy balls.

Today has been a superb day. Review is good, and I got myself a four pack of beer.

 

[JGlass]

I hope they're tall beers David, because you need more than four if you want to have a proper good time. You'll need a lot more than four beers, though. You'll also need a slip and slide.

 

[CH David]

Slip 'N Slide would be awesome. Kentucky Bourbon Barrel Ale is good stuff man. 12oz bottles. If you're a bourbon or whiskey fan, it's worth a try.

 

[JGlass]

After this week of bartending school (sorry I keep talking about it everyone, but it's pretty much what I'm doing this week. I have Assassins Creed III sitting next to my bed in the cardboard package it came in and I'm probably not going to open it until Friday night) I'm about ready to go out into the world and try all of these new drinks I've learned about. I'm also determined to make some hard eggnog to bring to D-Man's house on Friday for his Christmas party. You guys can come too if you want.

 

[CH David]

Do it! As well as Assassin's Creed III.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

Yeah AC3 is the tits.

I have a cold that hit out of nowhere that is kicking my ass. Sinus pressure like a mother fucker, sore throat, runny nose. Hate it. For some reason I always tend to get sick right around Christmas. Clearly baby Jesus hates me.

 

[CH David]

Get a neti pot! Clear that sinus pressure.

 

[CH David]

JGlass, have you seen trailers for Movie 43? If so, what are your thoughts?

 

[Theo Mays]

I found out today that I'm going to get fired. And it isn't for any of my doing since I pride myself on being the best damn worker (besides my mother) that this place has. My mom is going to be signing over the business to our marketing guy as she is tired of the administration stuff and just wants to be on the field with us. Well the idiot that he is left for the day and left the computer in the office on. Well he left open his plans for the business once he takes over. His first step is to fire my mom and then fire my cousin, best friend (no lost, he works Saturdays), and another guy (he sucks anyways). Then he is going to drop everyone's salary and hours. Next on his list is to fire me. Mainly so he can live in the apartment. He will then bring in more workers and just roll with my sister and my usual shift partner for staff.

It sucks because I actually like my job. And despite working more hours than I have before (I've been working 6 days a week now for a few months), I'm actually not stressed or overworked here. It's tough knowing that I'm going to get fired, but not knowing when it is going to happen. The residents here have become like a 2nd family to me. My mom and friend say it is a blessing in disguise as it'll do me good to get out and it will allow me to get back into going to school and finding a career. And I agree on that part, but knowing that my time here is short kind of sucks. It breaks my heart really.

 

[Pepe Silvia]

I found out today that I'm going to get fired. And it isn't for any of my doing since I pride myself on being the best damn worker (besides my mother) that this place has. My mom is going to be signing over the business to our marketing guy as she is tired of the administration stuff and just wants to be on the field with us. Well the idiot that he is left for the day and left the computer in the office on. Well he left open his plans for the business once he takes over. His first step is to fire my mom and then fire my cousin, best friend (no lost, he works Saturdays), and another guy (he sucks anyways). Then he is going to drop everyone's salary and hours. Next on his list is to fire me. Mainly so he can live in the apartment. He will then bring in more workers and just roll with my sister and my usual shift partner for staff.

It sucks because I actually like my job. And despite working more hours than I have before (I've been working 6 days a week now for a few months), I'm actually not stressed or overworked here. It's tough knowing that I'm going to get fired, but not knowing when it is going to happen. The residents here have become like a 2nd family to me. My mom and friend say it is a blessing in disguise as it'll do me good to get out and it will allow me to get back into going to school and finding a career. And I agree on that part, but knowing that my time here is short kind of sucks. It breaks my heart really.

Tell your mom? She's going to lose her job. She probably won't sign shit in that case,

 

[Theo Mays]

Tell your mom? She's going to lose her job. She probably won't sign shit in that case,

She knows about it and may have already signed the paper. If not, she is going to have him sign a paper that states he must keep her around after she signs the business over to him. If she did (things get hectic and lots of papers get signed around here for state regs, trainings, etc), then we're doomed. All I can see (if she signed) is Hogan and Bischoff tricking Dixie into signing over TNA. I don't think that is gonna help at all though. I don't have Sting around to win me my job back.

 

[JGlass]

JGlass, have you seen trailers for Movie 43? If so, what are your thoughts?

My thoughts are that it looks an awful lot like...



Or...

[YOUTUBE]azJyWHrShxs[/YOUTUBE]

Now it's not the same production company as those other two, but I get the strange feeling that they decided that if they got enough huge movie stars to be in one movie together it wouldn't matter what type of story they told or if the jokes in it were even the slightest bit clever; they could have the actors say, "Balls deep in camel dung," for the entire movie and it would still gross a few hundred mil on the opening weekend.

I'll wait for the critics to tell me if this movie has any merit.

I found out today that I'm going to get fired. And it isn't for any of my doing since I pride myself on being the best damn worker (besides my mother) that this place has. My mom is going to be signing over the business to our marketing guy as she is tired of the administration stuff and just wants to be on the field with us. Well the idiot that he is left for the day and left the computer in the office on. Well he left open his plans for the business once he takes over. His first step is to fire my mom and then fire my cousin, best friend (no lost, he works Saturdays), and another guy (he sucks anyways). Then he is going to drop everyone's salary and hours. Next on his list is to fire me. Mainly so he can live in the apartment. He will then bring in more workers and just roll with my sister and my usual shift partner for staff.

It sucks because I actually like my job. And despite working more hours than I have before (I've been working 6 days a week now for a few months), I'm actually not stressed or overworked here. It's tough knowing that I'm going to get fired, but not knowing when it is going to happen. The residents here have become like a 2nd family to me. My mom and friend say it is a blessing in disguise as it'll do me good to get out and it will allow me to get back into going to school and finding a career. And I agree on that part, but knowing that my time here is short kind of sucks. It breaks my heart really.

Does your mom know that she's going to get fired too? Is it too late to not go through with the deal? It sounds like he's straight up stabbing her in the back and attempting to be a really shitty person about it all. Seriously, this is the makings of an extremely underwhelming super villain.

 

[Pepe Silvia]

Just make sure you obey the chain of screaming and you'll be fine

 

[justinsayne]

She knows about it and may have already signed the paper. If not, she is going to have him sign a paper that states he must keep her around after she signs the business over to him. If she did (things get hectic and lots of papers get signed around here for state regs, trainings, etc), then we're doomed. All I can see (if she signed) is Hogan and Bischoff tricking Dixie into signing over TNA. I don't think that is gonna help at all though. I don't have Sting around to win me my job back.

No, but on your last day you could show up with Sting face paint & beat him with a baseball bat, would probably make you feel better about the situation for at least few seconds... then you'd probably end up going to jail.

 

[FunKay the Inevitable]

On a lighter note (sorry about your employment issues Theoski, I'm here if you ever need a chat), got myself a new signature to fit with the time of year. Marvellous, eh?

 

[justinsayne]

On a lighter note (sorry about your employment issues Theoski, I'm here if you ever need a chat), got myself a new signature to fit with the time of year. Marvellous, eh?

That reminds me, I needed to switch mine over to my Marvelous Holidays sig. Thanks for the reminder.

 

[jmt225]

I recently watched this wonderful, little known film called Mr. Nobody that I'm positive you'd enjoy, JGlass. It's a lot better and way more intriguing than that piece of shit Tree of Life you and Coco love so much, so I think you ought to give it a shot next time you're looking for a film to check out.

[YOUTUBE]oU_aIfityBQ[/YOUTUBE]

 

[Coco]

It's a lot better and way more intriguing than that piece of shit Tree of Life you and Coco love so much

You've been misinformed. I got nothing out of Tree of Life.

 

[Coco]

The thing is you can say Ziggler is just another cocky pretty boy heel but the difference is that he is doing it his way. Everybody in the WWE could use the same gimmick but if they each do it their way then itll be new to us. WWE is bound to do some of the same stuff over again. Just like the Shield is just a smaller Nexus in disguise. Ziggler will be the new "HBK" persay but he will do it the Ziggler way or the Nick Namath way. Ziggler has brought the Art Of Wrestling back to wrestling. What Ziggler does in the ring is ART. Ziggler is his own man, and i dont like compairing wrestlers or sports athletes but yes Ziggler is kinda like the next Shawn Michaels.

Good lord, what's the bar doing all the way down there?

 

[JGlass]

I recently watched this wonderful, little known film called Mr. Nobody that I'm positive you'd enjoy, JGlass. It's a lot better and way more intriguing than that piece of shit Tree of Life you and Coco love so much, so I think you ought to give it a shot next time you're looking for a film to check out.

[YOUTUBE]oU_aIfityBQ[/YOUTUBE]

You've been misinformed. I got nothing out of Tree of Life.

Yeah, I don't know what you thought you heard, but I definitely did not love Tree of Life. I thought it was pretty decent, but I would never tell someone that it's a great film that they must see.

As for this Mr. Nobody film, it looks very intriguing conceptually, so I'd be willing to give it a watch somewhere down the road.

 

[JGlass]

Good lord, what's the bar doing all the way down there?

I responded to him, mostly because I wanted to compare his post to poop.

Jack-Hammer's response was disappointing to me. People have been saying that Dolph Ziggler has a bright future for 3 years now. Are we still going to say he has a bright future when he's held the world title three times for a total of 21 days, every time as a very brief placeholder for a real star, or are we going to finally recognize that Dolph Ziggler will never amount to anything more than a tool that the WWE uses to make their good guys look great so they can fight with real villains, like CM Punk.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

But he does flippy flips across the ring when he gets punched. Clearly he is the future of the company.

 

[Coco]

I responded to him, mostly because I wanted to compare his post to poop.

Jack-Hammer's response was disappointing to me. People have been saying that Dolph Ziggler has a bright future for 3 years now. Are we still going to say he has a bright future when he's held the world title three times for a total of 21 days, every time as a very brief placeholder for a real star, or are we going to finally recognize that Dolph Ziggler will never amount to anything more than a tool that the WWE uses to make their good guys look great so they can fight with real villains, like CM Punk.

I read an idea that proposed that every time Ziggler wins the world title, he loses it on the same night. I love it. And if they ever wanted to make him a good guy, his first successful title defence could be a huge deal.

I popped.

 

[Барбоса]

I read an idea that proposed that every time Ziggler wins the world title, he loses it on the same night. I love it. And if they ever wanted to make him a good guy, his first successful title defence could be a huge deal.

I popped.

Hardcore title.