Sam's Thread of Chattin' w/ Jake & Other Robust Subjects

[Uncle Sam]

1. Before Midnight ★★★★★
2. Philomena ★★★★★
3. Blue Jasmine ★★★★★
4. Frozen ★★★★★
5. Stoker ★★★★★
6. Much Ado About Nothing ★★★★★
7. Furious Six ★★★★
8. From Up On Poppy Hill ★★★★
9. Django Unchained ★★★★
10. Upstream Colour ★★★★
11. The World's End ★★★★
12. Bernie ★★★★
13. You're Next ★★★★
14. A Field in England ★★★★
15. Cloud Atlas ★★★★
16. Zero Dark Thirty ★★★★
17. Only God Forgives ★★★★
18. Man of Steel ★★★★
19. Monsters University ★★★★
20. Spring Breakers ★★★★
21. Kings of Summer ★★★★
22. No ★★★★
23. Iron Man Three ★★★★
24. Thor: The Dark World ★★★★
25. Maniac ★★★
26. Jack the Giant Slayer ★★★
27. Star Trek Into Darkness ★★★
28. Filth ★★★
29. Pacific Rim ★★★
30. The Croods ★★★
31. Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa ★★★
32. Elysium ★★★
33. Gravity ★★★
34. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire ★★★
35. Behind the Candelabra ★★★
36. Flight ★★★
37. Captain Phillips ★★★
38. Lincoln ★★★
39. Oz the Great and Powerful ★★★
40. Evil Dead ★★★
41. Frances Ha ★★★
42. Pain & Gain ★★★
43. I'm So Excited ★★★
44. Stone Roses: Made of Stone ★★★
45. Mud ★★★
46. Kick-Ass 2 ★★★
47. Trance ★★★
48. The Great Gatsby ★★★
49. Compliance ★★★
50. Nebraska ★★
51. Rush ★★
52. Wreck-It Ralph ★★
53. Robot and Frank ★★
54. Warm Bodies ★★
55. Les Misérables ★★
56. The Iceman ★★
57. The Place Beyond the Pines ★★
58. Welcome to the Punch ★★
59. Side Effects ★★
60. The Bling Ring ★★
61. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug ★★
62. This is the End ★
63. Gangster Squad ★
64. The Spirit of '45 ★

The more I think about it, the more I think The Fellowship of the Ring was a fluke. Everything else Jackson has directed ranges from half-decent to absolute wank.

Jackson has brilliantly justified adapting The Hobbit into three films by packing in hours upon hours of a bunch of unnecessary Lord of the Rings shite. He doesn't seem to understand that The Hobbit is, well, The fucking Hobbit - not The Lord of the Rings: Before They Were Superstars. Dismal. It gets a second star for the half hour of screentime it gives to Martin Freeman, who's still the only good thing about this grimy, money-grabbing bullshit.

I liked Frozen so much that I'm probably now an Operation Yewtree suspect. Proper shits on The Hobbit.

 

[Thriller Ant]

I was surprised by how much I liked Frozen. Olaf is one of the best supporting characters I've seen in a while and they strayed far enough from the typical children's movie storyline to keep me interested the whole time. I'm also slightly obsessed with "Let it Go"

 

[Uncle Sam]

Rousing.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Who are you two trying to impress by liking Frozen?

 

[Lee]

Someone described Hobbit as LOTR fan fiction. Is that true?

 

[Uncle Sam]

Who are you two trying to impress by liking Frozen?

Women. Children. The Japanese.

Someone described Hobbit as LOTR fan fiction. Is that true?

So true that I'm sad I didn't come up with that first. There's even an inexplicable forced romance and a bizarre amount of graphic deaths.

 

[Thriller Ant]

Who are you two trying to impress by liking Frozen?

Tiny children and 20-year-olds longing for their childhood.

 

[Lee]

I quite liked the first Hobbit movie, dreading this one though.

 

[TLC]

Martin Freeman seems to be the only thing worth seeing in them. Frozen though is excellent.

 

[Coco]

Have you watched Raw yet, Samuel? I'm waiting on your enthusiastic reaction to the main event.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Oh right, that. Really must start setting it to record again.

 

[Thriller Ant]

Have you watched Raw yet, Samuel? I'm waiting on your enthusiastic reaction to the main event.

I was only vaguely interested in seeing Raw, but after reading about that match, I'm gonna have to suck it up and watch.

 

[Lee]

Someone sent me this on FB before:

 

[Uncle Sam]

Have you watched Raw yet, Samuel? I'm waiting on your enthusiastic reaction to the main event.

That was art. I've not been as infinitely enthusiastic about Bryan versus Orton as I felt I could have been, but that match lived up to the hype and the expectations you should have for the two best wrestlers in the world having a match. I've defended Orton vehemently before, and he's got some undeserved criticism, but the old Randy Orton is boring compared to the new one. If you'll excuse me, I have some crow to eat.

In short, ★★★★★.

 

[Барбоса]

While I still enjoyed it, I would definitely agree with some of the criticisms of Desolation of Smaug.

I found the amount of death rather strange in what is supposed to be a children's story and the romance is woeful. Also it crossed my mind that in a movie called the Hobbit, there were long stretches without any focus on that Hobbit. It came across very much as a "we need to get three movies out of this" even when there is not the material for it.

I did enjoy the the first scene with Smaug.

 

[Steamboat Ricky]

While I still enjoyed it, I would definitely agree with some of the criticisms of Desolation of Smaug.

I found the amount of death rather strange in what is supposed to be a children's story and the romance is woeful. Also it crossed my mind that in a movie called the Hobbit, there were long stretches without any focus on that Hobbit. It came across very much as a "we need to get three movies out of this" even when there is not the material for it.

I did enjoy the the first scene with Smaug.

Spoiler

On first view, it was easily the worst of the 5 Middle Earth films that Jackson has done. That being said, it was still enjoyable.

The amount of time spent fighting Smaug felt laborious. And then, the film ended with no resolution whatsoever. At least at the end of Two Towers, a primary conflict had been resolved and the film can stand alone. This one has little to no stand alone value for the casual viewer, IMO.

 

[Барбоса]

Spoiler

On first view, it was easily the worst of the 5 Middle Earth films that Jackson has done. That being said, it was still enjoyable.

The amount of time spent fighting Smaug felt laborious. And then, the film ended with no resolution whatsoever. At least at the end of Two Towers, a primary conflict had been resolved and the film can stand alone. This one has little to no stand alone value for the casual viewer, IMO.

Spoiler

To be honest, I did not mind the lack of resolution at the end. It certainly is not the first middle part of a trilogy to have little in the way of an ending, although it was a little more abrupt than most of those other middle parts.

I thoroughly enjoyed Bilbo entering Smaug's lair and his conversation with the dragon (Bilbo's corruption by the Ring was also a good scene) but after that the fight was a little long, mainly because it was not really a fight - it was an extended flight from the dragon. Smaug is almost too big and too powerful to provide a compelling fight.

Even though I knew it could not be solid, part of me briefly thought that the dwarf statue was going to open its eyes and smash Smaug like a big robot - probably played a bit too much Skyrim...

Gandalf at Dol Guldur was interesting, especially him coming face to face with the Necromancer (the imagery of Sauron and the Eye was neat) and sets up a battle to force him from that fortress.

That battle at Dol Guldur, Smaug's attack on Laketown and the large battle on the horizon should make the third instalment action-packed.

 

[Барбоса]

It gets a second star for the half hour of screentime it gives to Martin Freeman, who's still the only good thing about this grimy, money-grabbing bullshit.

I would not be at all surprised to see another set of movies about the War in the North during the War of the Ring.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I would not be at all surprised to see another set of movies about the War in the North during the War of the Ring.

Then you can go ahead and graphically behead me - and fifty orcs - now.

1. Before Midnight ★★★★★
2. Philomena ★★★★★
3. Blue Jasmine ★★★★★
4. Frozen ★★★★★
5. Stoker ★★★★★
6. Much Ado About Nothing ★★★★★
7. Furious Six ★★★★
8. From Up On Poppy Hill ★★★★
9. Django Unchained ★★★★
10. Upstream Colour ★★★★
11. The World's End ★★★★
12. Bernie ★★★★
13. You're Next ★★★★
14. A Field in England ★★★★
15. Cloud Atlas ★★★★
16. Zero Dark Thirty ★★★★
17. Only God Forgives ★★★★
18. Man of Steel ★★★★
19. Monsters University ★★★★
20. Spring Breakers ★★★★
21. Kings of Summer ★★★★
22. No ★★★★
23. Iron Man Three ★★★★
24. Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues ★★★★
25. Thor: The Dark World ★★★★
26. Maniac ★★★
27. Jack the Giant Slayer ★★★
28. Star Trek Into Darkness ★★★
29. Filth ★★★
30. Pacific Rim ★★★
31. The Croods ★★★
32. Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa ★★★
33. Elysium ★★★
34. Gravity ★★★
35. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire ★★★
36. Behind the Candelabra ★★★
37. Flight ★★★
38. Captain Phillips ★★★
39. Lincoln ★★★
40. Oz the Great and Powerful ★★★
41. Evil Dead ★★★
42. Frances Ha ★★★
43. Pain & Gain ★★★
44. I'm So Excited ★★★
45. Stone Roses: Made of Stone ★★★
46. Mud ★★★
47. Kick-Ass 2 ★★★
48. Trance ★★★
49. The Great Gatsby ★★★
50. Compliance ★★★
51. Nebraska ★★
52. Rush ★★
53. Wreck-It Ralph ★★
54. Robot and Frank ★★
55. Warm Bodies ★★
56. Les Misérables ★★
57. The Iceman ★★
58. The Place Beyond the Pines ★★
59. Welcome to the Punch ★★
60. Side Effects ★★
61. The Bling Ring ★★
62. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug ★★
63. This is the End ★
64. Gangster Squad ★
65. The Spirit of '45 ★

The only reason a comedy should ever run over ninety minutes is if it's unusually story-orientated and every line is solid gold, e.g. Shaun of the Dead. Anchorman 2 is fifteen minutes over and, weirdly, there's a consecutive fifteen minutes that needed to be cut. Otherwise it's consistently funny.

 

[Lee]

So Zelda and Dynasty Warriors is a thing.

 

[JGlass]

The only reason a comedy should ever run over ninety minutes is if it's unusually story-orientated and every line is solid gold, e.g. Shaun of the Dead. Anchorman 2 is fifteen minutes over and, weirdly, there's a consecutive fifteen minutes that needed to be cut. Otherwise it's consistently funny.

So basically what your saying is that comedies can only be as long as they want if they have a good story or are consistently funny throughout, i.e. good movies? Wow professor, you may be onto something here!

Where did you get this idea from so you can regurgitate it here? I know that was harsh, but I felt entitled.

 

[Uncle Sam]

No, my point is that it's easy for a comedy to outstay its welcome, particularly if it's as abstract and zany as Anchorman 2 (and it does outstay its welcome). Comedies rarely have the material to justify more than ninety minutes without feeling flabby (like Anchorman 2 does). They don't have to be good movies, they have to be exceptional ones. Editing is as important as writing or performances. This is the End is an extreme example of a film which needs more than an hour cut out, which is largely why it's so shit.

 

[JGlass]

No, my point is that it's easy for a comedy to outstay its welcome, particularly if it's as abstract and zany as Anchorman 2 (and it does outstay its welcome). Comedies rarely have the material to justify more than ninety minutes without feeling flabby (like Anchorman 2 does). They don't have to be good movies, they have to be exceptional ones. Editing is as important as writing or performances. This is the End is an extreme example of a film which needs more than an hour cut out, which is largely why it's so shit.

This is the End was generally well received by both critics and fans. Forgetting Sarah Marshall had similar popularity. Neither of these movies fit your bill of being either, "unusually story oriented," or movies where, "every line is solid."

This seems to be more of a you problem and less of a problem with the movies themselves. I really enjoyed both This is the End and Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and I think you'll find that there are plenty of people with all sorts of different tastes in film that are the same way. Heck, the New Yorker gave This is the End a favorable review.

Your entitled to your opinion, of course. I just don't think you really know what you're talking about in this case. The editor and director spend weeks, or more likely months carefully choosing each shot they put into a movie and then they have to get their product past several more checkpoint until the movie is finalized. The editor isn't going to let 20 minutes of unnecessary footage just get dumped into the movie.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Just because people spend a lot of time editing doesn't mean they can't do it badly. Lots of bad movies had a lot of time spent on them.

The fifteen minutes I was talking about in Anchorman 2 features 95% of the film's celebrity cameos - and 100% of the films unfunny celebrity cameos - so I can see why it wasn't cut. That's a lot of money to waste.

Edit: And my entire knowledge of The New Yorker comes from the "I'd be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic" joke from Family Guy. I'm guessing it's sorta high-fallootin'.

 

[JGlass]

Just because people spend a lot of time editing doesn't mean they can't do it badly. Lots of bad movies had a lot of time spent on them.

The fifteen minutes I was talking about in Anchorman 2 features 95% of the film's celebrity cameos - and 100% of the films unfunny celebrity cameos - so I can see why it wasn't cut. That's a lot of money to waste.

Edit: And my entire knowledge of The New Yorker comes from the "I'd be more apathetic if I weren't so lethargic" joke from Family Guy. I'm guessing it's sorta high-fallootin'.

Fair enough. I don't agree with you, but I see where you are coming from, and I don't want to argue with you. I'm watching Speed Racer and marveling at how amazing it is. It's literally of the most intelligently made films I've ever seen, and it has a chimpanzee.