WWE RAW LD 5th May 2014 - Hounds, Fire and Demonic Forces: Raw Goes to Hell

[FunKay the Inevitable]

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LAST NIGHT!
A Battle Won. A War Over?

Triple H wanted war? Well he got war. The Shield brought all Evolution could handle and more as the battle waged on into brutal, dangerous areas. Seth Rollins was flying all over the place, Dean Ambrose was channelling crazy, middle-aged Terry Funk and Roman Reigns entered Beast Mode. As Rollins flew off of an arena exit to take down Mr. Helmsley and Randall Orton, Roman Reigns speared the ever loving bejeezus out of David Batista to win the match for his team. The battle was won, but is the war over?

Fire: Walk With Me

On the other side of the Authority coin, Stephanie McMahon offered to let Daniel Bryan surrender the World Heavyweight gold. He declined and went ahead with an Attitude Era-esc brawl. Seriously: vehicles, random extras taking beatings, fire. Wait, what was that last thing? Yes, even fire. But even though Daniel Bryan defeated the monster with the Knee Plus/The Knee That Beat John Cena/The Knee/Busaiku Knee/Kitchen Sink Knee, Kane sat up. This one isn't over yet.

Cena's Kryptonite is Ole Anderson's Grandchild

The most controversial offering of last night's Special Event/PPV (I paid for it anyway) was the rematch between John Cena and Bray Wyatt. The right guy won, but in the right way? Remember how John Cena (and the rest of us) were scared shitless by the choir of brainwashed children on last week's Raw? Yeah, well Bray upped himself and when it seemed like he was set to lose, out came 'Little Johnny', who offered us a heat-warming rendition of that old favourite 'He's Got the Whole World (In His Hands)'. Demonic deep, Ole Anderson style voice and all. Suffice to say, Bray went on to win

BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOM(!) AND THE BEST OF THE REST!

It was an eventful evening at Extreme Rules away from the main events too. Bad News Barrett was able to recapture the Intercontinental Championship and end the most recent reign of mediocrity (poor Big E.). Cesaro successfully overcame his former tag partner, a botched ref count, terrible theme music and Rob Van Dam to win the three way elimination match. Rusev crushed and Lana stunned. Paige was able to tap Tamina out (my WZPC score does not that you my dear) and oh yes, WeeLC. Glorious.

The 3 Hour, Hokey Horror Raw Quiz!​

Is the war between the Shield and Evolution over?
Will Kane decide to rise from the depths of hell to claim revenge once again (seriously this make like what, the 16th time)
How will John Cena rise above not just hate but terrifying children?
Where does Cesaro go from here?
Surely this is the end of Midget War '14?
Who's next for Paige?
Can we have some decorum please?
When will we be witness to the debut of Adam Rose?
And remember, don't be a lemon, be a rosebud (and more, oh so much more...)

 

[Kermit]

When will we be witness to the debut of Adam Rose?

Tonight. They hyped it on Extreme Rules.

 

[FunKay the Inevitable]

Tonight. They hyped it on Extreme Rules.

I meant when within the show mi compadre. They've been hyping it since last week.

Also, Dean Ambrose defends in a 20 Man Over-the-Top Rope Battle Royal for the United States Championship tonight!

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

I meant when within the show mi compadre. They've been hyping it since last week.

Also, Dean Ambrose defends in a 20 Man Over-the-Top Rope Battle Royal for the United States Championship tonight!

I could see Rose taking the title. If Paige took the Diva's Title on her debut, why not Rose?

If not, Titus O'Neil is my personal pick. I like backing the dark horse.

 

[Kermit]

I meant when within the show mi compadre. They've been hyping it since last week.

Also, Dean Ambrose defends in a 20 Man Over-the-Top Rope Battle Royal for the United States Championship tonight!

Really? Dang. I don't watch NXT, but his character seems pretty fun. Do you watch NXT, Funkster? And if so, what should I expect from Rose?

 

[Awesome_Miz]

I could see Rose taking the title. If Paige took the Diva's Title on her debut, why not Rose?

If not, Titus O'Neil is my personal pick. I like backing the dark horse.

Nah, more like a surprise entrant. BOLIEVE THAT!

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

Nah, more like a surprise entrant. BOLIEVE THAT!

That'd be a decent way to get him heat, but I think it'll overshadow Adam Rose's debut if that happens personally. Plus, Bo Dallas is the ostentatious heel, and would probably announce himself ahead of time.

 

[FunKay the Inevitable]

I could see Rose taking the title. If Paige took the Diva's Title on her debut, why not Rose?

If not, Titus O'Neil is my personal pick. I like backing the dark horse.

Eh, Rose doesn't seem the championship type (then again, what's the championship type?). I can't see O'Neil taking it either. Perhaps Rusev taking the gold hostage?

Really? Dang. I don't watch NXT, but his character seems pretty fun. Do you watch NXT, Funkster? And if so, what should I expect from Rose?

I do not, but KB does and according to his reviews, he's fun. Used to be Leo Kruger. For info on that, consult KB or Remix, because I really don't know very much about him either.

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

Eh, Rose doesn't seem the championship type (then again, what's the championship type?). I can't see O'Neil taking it either. Perhaps Rusev taking the gold hostage?

Rusev would be good in an ideal world, but if WWE wants him to be the monster heel he's being built up to be, that probably means not going for the mid-card titles, at least not in this point of his career. Although that would be a good idea if the circumstances were right.

 

[Viola Moonlight]

If Ambrose were to lose his title, a Battle Royale would be the way to do it. Unless Creative decides that Ambrose should defeat Lex Luger's record, then we have a new champion.

I'm excited for Rose and to see how the crowd reacts. I'm looking forward to Bo Dallas more though. I'm more of a BOliever than a rosebud.

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

I'm excited for Rose and to see how the crowd reacts. I'm looking forward to Bo Dallas more though. I'm more of a BOliever than a rosebud.

Same here, although that may be my bias for the Leo Kruger gimmick.

 

[Awesome_Miz]

Really? Dang. I don't watch NXT, but his character seems pretty fun. Do you watch NXT, Funkster? And if so, what should I expect from Rose?

Kerm, all you need to know is that...... IT'S PARTY TIME! ALL THE TIME!!!!

 

[The Butcher]

Neither Dallas nor Rose should be winning the US title. For one thing it's worthless, and for another, fans still don't know what to make of Paige. WWE would be stupid to put another new arrival in that spot, dragging around a belt no one cares about while simultaneously trying to establish their character. Don't wish ill on these new stars. If it were my call, I'd put the belt on Rusev and let him throw it in a garbage can or adorn it with a hammer and sickle for some of that Cold War heat.

 

[Awesome_Miz]

That'd be a decent way to get him heat, but I think it'll overshadow Adam Rose's debut if that happens personally. Plus, Bo Dallas is the ostentatious heel, and would probably announce himself ahead of time.

Hey, you never know. Bo can somehow turn this into his advantage and get the heel heat he has in NXT.

 

[Skyeborne]

I am so hyped for Raw tonight!

DON'T BE A LEMON! BE A ROSEBUD!

 

[Viola Moonlight]

Neither Dallas nor Rose should be winning the US title. For one thing it's worthless, and for another, fans still don't know what to make of Paige. WWE would be stupid to put another new arrival in that spot, dragging around a belt no one cares about while simultaneously trying to establish their character. Don't wish ill on these new stars. If it were my call, I'd put the belt on Rusev and let him throw it in a garbage can or adorn it with a hammer and sickle for some of that Cold War heat.

Having two US title defenses on television in a row seems to be a step in the right direction. Although, Dallas nor Rose shouldn't win as the competition isn't completely void of wrestlers unlike the Diva's division where AJ decimated everyone, leaving someone like Paige as the only viable option.

Paige has been wrestling and winning, similar to Rusev. Both characters need a good storyline for people to start caring but the talent is definitely there.

Rusev should only take the title if he defends it in every match and gives people an open challenge to others because he & Lana know that he is too strong to beat. That'll make Rusev squashes much more interesting and hopefully give the title some legitimacy.

I seem to understand that you don't like the US title.

 

[The Butcher]

Having two US title defenses on television in a row seems to be a step in the right direction. Although, Dallas nor Rose shouldn't win as the competition isn't completely void of wrestlers unlike the Diva's division where AJ decimated everyone, leaving someone like Paige as the only viable option.

Paige has been wrestling and winning, similar to Rusev. Both characters need a good storyline for people to start caring but the talent is definitely there.

Rusev should only take the title if he defends it in every match and gives people an open challenge to others because he & Lana know that he is too strong to beat. That'll make Rusev squashes much more interesting and hopefully give the title some legitimacy.

I seem to understand that you don't like the US title.

You don't seem to understand that there is no giving that title any legitimacy. It's damaged goods. It doesn't do anything for anyone. There's no need for it. It's not a matter of like or dislike. Explain to me why it's there.

I thoroughly enjoyed Paige on NXT, but WWE screwed up by giving her the title upon her debut. I marked for it because I like the girl, but at the ripe old age of 21, she has nowhere to go and is a curiosity to casual viewers.

Like I said, I'd have Rusev desecrate the title to get him some heat. It would do somebody some good in that regard. They need to do something to get Rusev over. When your legitimately Eastern European monster is overshadowed by his American playing a European valet there's a problem. Honestly I'd be fine if he went back to Samurai Deli, but since he's here they need to give him more than Xavier f'n Woods

 

[The_Reptile_]

There really is no saving the IC or US championship. The only reason Ambrose is still relevant is because he's part of the Shield, and even then he's been gradually overshadowed by both Rollins and Reigns. Langston's push basically died the minute he got the IC Strap.

What they need to do is just retire those belts, maybe for a year or two so that their reputation dies away and bring one of them back for the midcard title. It's not like it'd hamper any stories on the show, because those belts get none.

 

[Skyeborne]

Hey guys...

Let's not forget that Paul Heyman's client, Brock Lesnar, conquered the Undertaker's undefeated streak at Wrestlemania.

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

There really is no saving the IC or US championship. The only reason Ambrose is still relevant is because he's part of the Shield, and even then he's been gradually overshadowed by both Rollins and Reigns. Langston's push basically died the minute he got the IC Strap.

What they need to do is just retire those belts, maybe for a year or two so that their reputation dies away and bring one of them back for the midcard title. It's not like it'd hamper any stories on the show, because those belts get none.

I wouldn't go that far. Ditching one of them is definitely a step in the right direction, so the other hopefully increases in importance and gets more screen time. Keyword being hopefully.

 

[The Butcher]

Hey guys...

Let's not forget that Paul Heyman's client, Brock Lesnar, conquered the Undertaker's undefeated streak at Wrestlemania.

First I've heard about this.

 

[Viola Moonlight]

You don't seem to understand that there is no giving that title any legitimacy. It's damaged goods. It doesn't do anything for anyone. There's no need for it. It's not a matter of like or dislike. Explain to me why it's there.

No matter how damaged something can be, it is never too damaged for a complete restart (an alternative to removing it completely).

I thoroughly enjoyed Paige on NXT, but WWE screwed up by giving her the title upon her debut. I marked for it because I like the girl, but at the ripe old age of 21, she has nowhere to go and is a curiosity to casual viewers.

AJ requested time off and needed the belt off her ASAP. She beat everyone else on the roster. Tamina could've turned on her but that would be counter-productive: creative wants a heel Tamina and a quick turn on AJ to defeat her for the title requires an instant feud.

They needed another option and Paige was it. This means she has a slew of new competition to face on the main roster and potentially bring in some other people to face her. You can always have Paige lose the title unceremoniously and create a chase story.

Like I said, I'd have Rusev desecrate the title to get him some heat. It would do somebody some good in that regard. They need to do something to get Rusev over. When your legitimately Eastern European monster is overshadowed by his American playing a European valet there's a problem. Honestly I'd be fine if he went back to Samurai Deli, but since he's here they need to give him more than Xavier f'n Woods

Or Rusev could win the United States belt and piss off everybody by holding onto it. You get more bang for your buck in the long run as Lana can gear her speeches towards Rusev being the US champ every week. Short term solutions for Rusev are useless.

 

[Dan Severn's Moustache]

Let's not forget Rusev is going to be a short term solution in himself when he challenges for the WWE Title.

 

[The_Reptile_]

Yeah, I love Rusev but his shelf life lasts as long as his first pin/submission loss to a main eventer.

 

[The Butcher]

No matter how damaged something can be, it is never too damaged for a complete restart (an alternative to removing it completely).

It's not worth a complete restart.

AJ requested time off and needed the belt off her ASAP. She beat everyone else on the roster. Tamina could've turned on her but that would be counter-productive: creative wants a heel Tamina and a quick turn on AJ to defeat her for the title requires an instant feud.

They needed another option and Paige was it. This means she has a slew of new competition to face on the main roster and potentially bring in some other people to face her. You can always have Paige lose the title unceremoniously and create a chase story.

Short term solutions for the Divas are useless.

Or Rusev could win the United States belt and piss off everybody by holding onto it. You get more bang for your buck in the long run as Lana can gear her speeches towards Rusev being the US champ every week. Short term solutions for Rusev are useless.

Yeah, because everybody was really pissed when Antonio Cesaro was holding onto the US title and denigrating Americans every week.

Give me a break.