The best lines ever

[RedRegan1005]

I was looking around the forums and saw this thread forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?t=271899 which was posted by Jeffery9800. Had i not checked out his thread I wouldn't of thought of this so i figured i should at least give a little credit to his thread. While was thinking of some of my favorite promos i realized something. Most great promos have that that one line that you immediately think of when you think of that wrestler or that promo. So I figure I would take the aforementioned thread and use it as motivation for this thread. Lets go deeper than best promo. Lets talk about some of the best lines ever. It could be from a wrestler, announcer, manager, or on air character, it doesn't matter. Just give some of your most memorable and best wrestling lines. Not whole promos, just a single sentence or two that really stuck out.

Two that immediately come to mind for me are:

CM Punk to the Rock : "Your arms are just too short to box with god." That line literally gave me goose bumps and actually made me think that they wouldn't feed Punk to the Rock at the rumble and maybe have him wait to lose it at Elimination Chamber.

Ric Flair after 1992 Royal Rumble:"with a tear in my eye, this is the greatest moment of my life." Awesome line that in one sentenced explained how big winning the title was for him.

I'm sure as time goes on I'll think of more but I'm looking forward too seeing what everybody else says.

 

[HBK89Bill]

There are better ones, but one that fit perfectly was immediately after your example of Punk/Rock. It was in the Sun Life Stadium and Punk told The Rock how his vision is bs and how much better he is and Heyman just goes,

"In the era of CM Punk, it doesn't matter what your vision is." It was perfect.

 

[John Cena's Sweatbands]

Not a line from a promo, but from an interview which set in motion events that would culminate in two Wrestlemania main events:

"Just don’t fuck me around and tell me that you love this."

John Cena talking about The Rock in 2008.

Where the feud all started and took 4 years to happen.

 

[suleman09]

This is a good topic, I do love when cm punk said the whole boxing thing to the rock

The whole promo of cm punk vs cena the raw before MITB 2011, I dont have the link bc im typing from my phone but that promo where he said many things including "back in 2002 when the big guys were saying to you 'the kid cant hang' and now youre the one saying to me that the kid cant hang"
Talking about how cena has lost sight always thinking that he is the underdog

 

[DarksideEric]

My favorite ever, not including the "arms are too short to box with God" that was already mentioned was Macho Man's:

"I'm too hot to handle and too cold to hold."

I think that is one of the best and simplest lines I've ever heard.

 

[FlairFan2003]

There have been so many memorable lines its hard to pick. Obviously many top stars had tag lines, IE standard catch phrases they used during or ending promos. Brett Hart's rant (Best there is...), Hogan's end of promo warning (Whatch gonna do...), And Flair's "To Be The Man..." (probably the most quoted wrestler line by main stream sports athletes and coaches) are among the most famous. More recently Cena's "Hustle, loyalty, respect" mantra would be on that list.

Memorable lines thrown out during individual promos... very tough, The Flair promo after he won The Royal Rumble was one of his better ones but my favorite was his multi promo taunt to Randy Savage before WrestleMania 8 (she was mine before she was yours, she's damaged goods!).

Of course his taunt to Ricky Steamboat, while clad in a mink coat accompanied by multiple young models was also classic "Why dont you go home and help the missus with the dishes".

Kevin Nash semi shoot interview in April 97 prior to the Slamboree PPV was one of his best, highlighted by his "left the road bare" comment in response to Roddy Piper & Flair's assertion that they "paved the road" for future stars like him.

Jim Ross isnt a wrestler but his "The billion dollar princess just became the dairy queen" remark during the wild Kurt Angle milk truck attack on Raw (drenching Stephanie with milk) was priceless.

The Rock had so many its hard to pick just one.

Some other memorable Flair taunts include bragging about making a career out of beating up guys in face paint while confronting Ultimate Warrior & his rant about "big girls" vs "teeny boppers" while handing Ricky Morton a training bra (unbelievably good promo as Morton chides Flair for turning on the fans and Flair explains that the fans should be happy just to be in his presence before launching into his teeny bopper tirade and giving Morton the training bra).

 

[wwewz]

CM Punk to the Rock : "Your arms are just too short to box with god." That line literally gave me goose bumps and actually made me think that they wouldn't feed Punk to the Rock at the rumble and maybe have him wait to lose it at Elimination Chamber.

I don't get why some people think that line is so good. Are people aware that it's a well known saying? So it's not even like he invented it.
It's a good line don't get me wrong, but I mean, I don't get why people think it's better than good.
To me it's no different when Rock said to Cena: "The good lord can't save you from The Rock whoopin' your monkey ass all over Chicago"

 

[bryan vs cm punk wm30]

My favorite lines were when cm punk told triple H " your gonna kick my ass well that's great but guess what im gonna kick your ass"and when he said in that same promo "this isn't cm punk talking to triple H this is Phil Brooks talking to Paul Levesque" it made it feel real.

 

[StraightEdge]

When Kane and Lita had the wedding and Trish comes out and tells Lita.

"Everything Is going to be just fine. All you have to do is open your heart. Just like you opened your legs."

 

[bigben929]

The Rock to Booker T, during the Invasion:
"What's 2+2? Do you know Booker? '2+2? I know the answer to that! THOMAS JEFFERSON SUCKA!'"
I realize it doesn't quite hold the gravitas that some of your lines hold but I almost die every time I hear it.

 

[Duderino]

"Damn that's a good-ass testicle!" - The Rock during a mostly forgettable backstage promo with Edge

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmghK-NgGRM (around 3:00-4:20)

 

[Oldschoolersrule]

One of the best "lines" ever, in my opinion, was said by Rowdy Roddy Piper, on (I believe) the first Pipers Pit. He said, and I quote, "Just when you think you know the answers, I change the questions." That is one of the most memorable ones... Others include : "I'm the reason Hogan don't have no hair!", "I SCARE FLAIR!!", "I'm so quick, I could spit in the wind, duck, and let it hit the old lady behind me!" "I came here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm all outta bubblegum."


Bobby Heenan was another with great talent for one liners, though from reading alot of the posts on Wrestlezone, I get the feeling most are too young to know who he is.

 

[Bookerkingston]

Oh man.... too many I could never think of them all right now or later....I don't know how "famous" these are but they are some of my favorites anyway.

1. Undertaker: "I hate EVERYBODY..."

2. Batista to John Cena: "While you're out here kissing babies and hugging fat girls, I'm gonna be winning titles and making money!"

3. Bret Hart: "Hey Stone Cold Steve Austin, remember that ambulance I was in tonight? Well before the night is through, you will be riding in it all busted up in pieces!!"

4. CM Punk to John Cena: "Don't worry you'll still have your big fight with Dwayne, and maybe be in the Marine 4...and you'll still have your legion of fans that will pee in their pajamas every time they hear your name."

5. Triple H: "Who is the man?"
Shawn: "Me."
Triple H: "Who is the showstopper?"
Shawn: "ME!"
Triple H: "And who is the main event?"
Shawn: "ME!"

6. Batista to the crowd: "When I look at you I don't see fans. I don't even see people. All I see is money, money, dollar signs, dollar signs, and with some of you people I see alot of dollar signs because some of you are fat and I know you pay for two seats! Thank you."

7. Big Show battle rapping Cena: "Yo dude, I done punked you out all over town. What you gonna do about it bitch, I'm 500 pounds!!!"

8. Paul Bearer: "Damn you Undertaker....damn you to HELL!!"

9. Stone Cold: "I got a bunch of bananas for Gorilla Monsoon and I can tell him where to stick every one of em!!"

10. Scott Steiner to AJ Styles: "When you're laying on your winnie the pooh pillow and your wife tucks you in at night, who you think she calls to get some satisfaction? The Big Bad Booty Daddy!"

 

[The Warlord]

Too many good ones to pick just one...so heres one that I saw not too long ago:

Austin to the Nation of Domination: "It aint a race thing, it aint a color thing....its a me kickin your ass thing!!..."

His delivery was gold, like 95% of his stuff.

 

[TM Punk]

Bret Hart to Wade Barrett circa 2010: You are no longer the superstar... Next... Biggest... Superstar... Wwf.

Chris Jericho to Edge: You're right, I dont know what its like to come back from injury. Because I dont get injured, I win titles.

Miz to John Cena: You're right John, I cant see you. Because your movies arent in theaters long enough.

Bobby Heenan: Marty tried to get away by jumping through the window.

Vince McMahon: It was me Austin! It was me the WHOLE TIME!

Jake Roberts to Hulk Hogan: How big were your arms after I left you lying, 24? Yeah... 24 cold, man. cold.

 

[Sexcellence of Sexecution]

Vince McMahon alone has some of the best lines ever.

"Life SSSSSUCKS...and then you DIE!"

"I enjoy destroying lives. It turns me on."

"Bret screwed Bret."

"I'm your GENETIC JACKHAMMER!"

"WCW is BURIED. WCW will REMAIN BURIED."

"It's aaaaaalllllllll about the MON-AY!"

"It's me Austin, it was me aaaaalllllll along Austin!"

 

[OG Mark]

Nash: "Come on out, Scott. It's LAST CALL!"

Austin (paraphrase): "I'm gonna walk down Jaborni Avenue, head to the Smackdown Hotel, check into room 316, and burn that son of a ----- to the ground."

"The deal is official... And the contract reads McMahon..."

 

[sanefan_har]

"YOOOOUUUUUUU, HO KOGAN!!" - Ultimate Warrior, before the WM6 match

That has to be one of my favorites along with this.

"Thanks, but I know where that hand's been" - CM Punk to Stephanie McMahon

 

[enviousdominous]

One thing I love about pro-wrestling, the gloves can come off when it comes to a one-liner. These are characters sending messages to other characters, so nobody is really hurt in the long run. Sometimes, it's absolutely brilliant. Sharing a few all time favorites.

Ron Garvin: I'M GONNA HIT YOU SO HARD!! YOU'LL STARVE TO DEATH ROLLING!!

Bobby Heenan: So you've been married for twenty years huh? Do you realize that if on your wedding day, you killed her, you'd be out by now?

Roddy Piper to Hogan: Do you really think they'd love you if they didn't hate me?!

Jim Cornette: Wrestling fans watch a wrestling program to watch wrestlers WRESTLE!

Jake The Snake: A powerful man can speak softly, and everyone will listen.

Mick Foley to ECW crowd:YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I SOLD OUT!! I SOLD OUT THIS ARENA!!

Ric Flair: When somebody has convinced you that you're not worth anything to anybody anymore, and they spend a lot of time doing it, you start believing it yourself.

 

[Sheltonguy]

Brock Lesnar "Paul say something stupid"

Not the best ever but it surely is funny everytime

 

[MattRhys20]

VKM: I don't care what you people want

Punk: THAT'S THE PROBLEM

The entire WWE product of the past 8 years, summed up in 10 words

 

[#heel420]

Rock To Booker T & Shane Raw before Summerslam 2001

"Booker T hair by Whoopi, Shane McMahon still a pussy."

 

[Christian Faith]

Jerry Lawler- "That Diesel is so scary his razor backs away from his face"

And Jerry again- "Mr Mcmahon has muscles in places Flair doesn't even have places"

The Undertaker (to the crowd)- "Say what if you sleep with your sister!"

(the crowd actually did stop chanting WHAT which made it funnier)

Any time the Rock used "IT DOESN'T MATTER" used to crack me up

Shane Mcmahon- "I now own WCW".
I honestly believed WCW would be kept around at this point.

 

[JJV]

Punk's pipebomb
"You're a better ass kisser than Hulk Hogan ever was. But I'm not sure if you're as good as Dwayne. Now he's a pretty good ass kisser"

Triple H to Punk: How was your movie?
Punk: Mine was great. It went straight to DVD just like yours

Taker: Say what again if y'all sleep with your sisters

Austin 3:16

Taker "The streak may be over at Wrestlemania. But you will never live to talk about it"

There's just so many!

 

[Wolf Pac]

[youtube]awCTJ56ya8E[/youtube]

Not only did The Rock take the piss out of most of WCW's major stars, not only did The Rock manage to outdo DX's entire Corporation parody in just 50 seconds, but this is one of those moments where you knew The Rock would go on to become something truly special. Not only was hilarious but it was pure genius on Rock's part. Shawn's reactions especially to Ric Flair's catchphrase, were priceless.