Sam's Thread of Chattin' w/ Jake & Other Robust Subjects

[Lee]

or David Platt

 

[Uncle Sam]

David Platt and Rosie Webster, on Christmas!? My my. I shared a birthday with Rita one year but not the next. Curious.

 

[Tastycles]

I share a birthday with Tom Cunningham off Hollyoaks.

 

[Uncle Sam]

That the little kid? I swear they're giving him the stuff they gave Gary Coleman.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I watched Monsters. Empire was right with its five star review. It's definitely a four star film.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Just watched fifteen minutes of 500 Days of Summer. Marc Webb is a good director, turns out. Probably.

 

[Lee]

Just watched fifteen minutes of 500 Days of Summer. Marc Webb is a good director, turns out. Probably.

I watched it the week I broke up with my gf. I hate zooey now

 

[Uncle Sam]

Yeah, well, the bloke in it has a really long neck. His name escapes me.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I'll be going to a Q & A with Edgar Wright on the 30th. I'd ask him "Why was Hot Fuzz so shit?" but, you know, he's the one with the microphone. Also, I'm deathly polite.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Where is this? I will ask.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I don't know. My friend rang me and said he'd got me a ticket. The same one I got a present for. See, Jake? What comes around goes around.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Man, I've been missing out on this shit for years. I'm going to buy my mate, like, something that doesn't spring to mind at this very moment.

Nowhere Boy, so fucking shit.

 

[Tastycles]

I was lost in Leeds today. Seeing Primark, I thought "I know, I'll go and ask Becca". Then I remembered I was a normal human being and used a Tourist Information map.

 

[Lee]

That would have been fucking hilarious

 

[Uncle Sam]

Every time I see a girl giving me a weird look, I'm like, "Huh? Becca?". Then I remember there are lots of girls that like to give me weird looks.

I was gonna watch Hot Fuzz again but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I'm going go pay money I don't have to watch Tron in 3D later. Bet it's gonna be wank to boot. Everybody else will like it and find my valid criticisms to be "elitist", I'm sure.

 

[HBK-aholic]

I was lost in Leeds today. Seeing Primark, I thought "I know, I'll go and ask Becca". Then I remembered I was a normal human being and used a Tourist Information map.

You should have done!

 

[Uncle Sam]

Didn't like Tron. Forget why. Have flu.

 

[Uncle Sam]

World's most homogeneous lead. Only four action scenes and they're not even long - or good. Soufflé-fragile plot, piss-poor structure, which, when it's supposedly taken over a decade and thousands upon thousands of dollars to write is absolutely pathetic. "Enjoy your swim!" is the worst line I've heard in a long time. Jeff Bridges and Michael Sheen are bright spots in something that's otherwise a complete charm vacuum. If it didn't have a Daft Punk soundtrack, it would be a contender for worst movie of the year.

Mind you, I'm watching 2012 now and it's making Tron look amazing in comparison.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Y'know what'd make Tron better? 2D.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I enjoyed 2012 for its absolutely baffling array of bad accents. My favourite bit is where they let everyone onto the ships even though it means mass starvation. Bleeding heart politicians.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Up In The Air was great. I missed the beginning. Definitely deserved the Oscar over The Hurt Locker, which was held together by rubber bands.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Film of the year? Mines I'm Still Here, or Piranha 3D.

 

[Uncle Sam]

My horrible memory means I'll probably pick the wrong one. Definitely not Inception. Definitely not Monsters. Definitely not Tron. Definitely not all those films that I can't even remember seeing. So, um, Toy Story 3 vs. Scott Pilgrim vs. Social Network. Fincher vs. Wright vs. Pixar (because who gives a fuck about individual Pixar directors, huh?). I'll have to give it to Toy Story 3, I think.

True Grit'll probably be my 2011 film of the year.

 

[Lee]

Merry Boxing Day

 

[Uncle Sam]

You're too kind. Between this and finally trimming my beard to more closely resemble CM Punk ("Look," they'll yell, "One of those Yanks with dumb facial hair!"), best Boxing Day ever.