Prison Troll Bingo

[Rayne]

This is becoming a thing, and I need your help.

Whenever a prisoner gets thrown in here, there are a few stock phrases they almost always say. "I'm in here for unjust reasons", or "This isn't a real prison". If we had this game going two months ago, I think we would have had a lot of fun with it, but there have been prisoners like LBK before, and there will be again. Let's be ready for that day.

What are some of the stock phrases you can remember from prisoners of yore? Remember, they shouldn't be that long (I'm going to have to fit them, legibly, on a 5x5 grid remember), and should be loosely worded enough to cover general cases. For instance, "you can't prove your argument" and "I've already proven that" could be wrapped up in the same category, "The Call To Proof". (See also: "The Call To Truth" and "The Call To Facts"- should the specific use of the word be what triggers the square?)

If we get enough of these I'll be able to distribute cards around for the next time we get a prisoner, which should be very easy considering we're all actually the same people.

 

[Dirk]

"This forum is shit"

"I'll just make another account"

"Bill Lesnar is better than you" - by visitors

"You kiss the mods' asses"

"You know I'm actually right"

 

[Rayne]

Off the top of my head (and it looks like I'm thinking more in terms of 'categories a phrase would trigger'):

The Call To Truth
The Call To Proof
The Call To Facts
You All Must Have No Friends
My Rights Have Been Violated (this needs some kind of bonus when they add "First Amendment" or "Constitutional")
The Admins Are Corrupt
Self-Deification
I Know You Are, But What Am I
The Prison Is A Lie

I figure we'll need at least 30-35, so that the cards don't end up with the exact same items, just in different places.

 

[Spidey Revivey]

"I don't understand how I broke the rules."

"The mods are nazis/nazi-like."

"When can I get out?"

A stream of adolescent obscenities

"None of you have lives."

 

[Rayne]

Proper Grammer; Attack!

 

[nightmare]

Random conceited comments "I am better than all of you", etc

Fat\****e mom jokes.

Lies about being a mod\positions of power on another site.

Conspiracy theories.

 

[Spidey Revivey]

Lest we forget how many times a prisoner said they were reformed.

 

[Dowdsy McDowds]

Basement dwelling/living with parents

Mark

Overuse of smilies

 

[Rayne]

Getting close. Taking out the ones which I don't think I could whittle down to a short enough description, I'd say we need about ten to fifteen more and we're ready to go.

"Take This Thread Seriously" is another.

 

[Dowdsy McDowds]

Complaining about a picture of shit in their rep - 'Shit in rep'

Having their name/picture changed

"I'm baaaaaack"

 

[nightmare]

"Never had a girlfriend"


"Why cant I post elsewhere on WZ?"\Not understanding revoked privileges.


Internet tough guy threats


'I quit' & the eventual return


Demanding satisfaction in return for a something "Ill leave if you just..."


Prison shoot promo

 

[Rayne]

Somehow, we all missed "I Don't Care What You Guys Think". That's like a guaranteed square, just a matter of time until it comes up.

We're actually pretty close to making this a thing now instead of a silly joke. It's easy enough for me to format the boards, I just need a couple of hours of spare time.

 

[BaconBits]

"I'm not ******ed"

 

[nightmare]

Im important in real life

I know a wrestler\celebrity

 

[Reflection]

Great thread. One more line I'd like to add is "Aren't the rules subjective? Why should I be put in prison / given an infraction because a mod got butthurt / thinks I'm spamming?" We rarely see these arguments these days... The "Y'all don't have a life" and "must be living in your mom's basement" are always classic arguments for the lulz.

 

[Spidey Revivey]

- he's a gutless little pussy that doesn't hVe the intelligence to do anything original or factual...

Is bad spelling while insulting someone's intelligence on the cards yet?

 

[lil bitch Kid]

Is bad spelling while insulting someone's intelligence on the cards yet?

Oh, no, your hero is human.... I made a typo. It'll be ok, lil bitch. Don't go harming yourself.

 

[Spidey Revivey]

Oh no, your hero is human.... I made a typo. It'll be ok, lil bitch. Don't go harming yourself.

Fixed it for you.

 

[lil bitch Kid]

Fixed it for you.

Did it really bother you that much that your hero made a typo?

 

[Spidey Revivey]

Did it really bother you that much that your hero made a typo?

When people rape punctuation marks and fuck up four letter words, it bothers me yes.

 

[lil bitch Kid]

When people rape punctuation marks and fuck up four letter words, it bothers me yes.

I have explained the correct use of the comma for those, including you, who require the help of remedial English. Now, I made a typo. I am using an IPad and as I was typing, I hit the "shift" key when going for the "a" and then hit the "v" right after and therefore got a capital "v". It is called a typo. I know it hurts you to no end that your hero, me, could make any kind of mistake, but you'll have to try and get over this without harming yourself. If you can't, then go get yourself put into the funny farm where you likely belong anyway.

 

[lil bitch Kid]

When people rape punctuation marks and fuck up four letter words, it bothers me yes.

Unless, of course, you are confusing "comma" and "coma". You have talked about how you like to fuck dead people, so maybe you want to rape people who are in a deep or induced sleep caused by some kind of head trauma. Clearly you don't know how to use a comma, so this may actually explain a lot.

 

[therockiswwf]

How does fucking dead people have anything to do with grammar?

 

[lil bitch Kid]

How does fucking dead people have anything to do with grammar?

My god, please tell me I don't have to teach you how to read too. He claimed to like to fuck dead people and then talked about raping punctuation. I can only assume he is confusing (since he's fucking ******ed) a "comma" and a "coma" and that he's trying to get his tiny rocks off because of it.

 

[therockiswwf]

Well if your god starts talking to you, you might have more problems than teaching me how to read.