John Tenta Got Me A Date

[Tenta]

Yes, I said that coorectly.... John Tenta, of all people, in action figure form, actually got me a date This Tuesday.

First, a little update.... Threesome chick has been a thing of the past for a couple days. After a little talk with NorCal, I realized that the road this chick and I were going down just wasn't going to work, and we're best just going our separate ways. She's donezo, and has been since... Well, I guess it was last Monday, wasn't it. NorCal, I know you're on your WZ summit, but if you get a chance to read this, thank you so much.

Now then, today I was at the mall. Admittedly, I was a little bummed, and today was a day I neither had work nor summer class. So I decided to get everyone from everyone for a little while, and just go the mall and chill. Didn't think I was going to buy anything or shit, but just to be by myself. Anyway, I'm hanging out, and see this advertisement for WWE Classic Superstar action figures. I didn't even know they made these fucking things, but damn it if it didn't perk my curiosity. And so I walk in, trying to look real casual, because it's mainly a bunch of six year olds and their parents. The clerk gave me a pretty funny look. Anyway, I make my way over to that figure aisle, and there were two things that struck me as odd.

1. There was quite an attractive girl in the aisle, not really looking at any of the figures, but just really texting and shit. I assumed she was probably there with family, or was picking up something for a family member. But yeah, she looked about my age, (in this day and age, especially with how old I am, I have to be really careful to make sure she is my age. There's a reason for jailbait's out there) and was just texting away, not really paying any attention to the figures.

2. Lo and behold, this little beauty happened to be on sale for $7.99:

I shit you not, it was a fucking Earthquake figure. Well, I figured I had two options;

1. Buy the thing, and mark the fuck out, and look like a complete nerd in front of her.

2. Just walk away from it, and try to take the "too cool for school route", maybe saying hi as I walked by, and maybe asking her if she could help me out with something. I really didn't have much of a plan.

In the end, my inner mark won out. I tried to be composed and such as I went to the figure, trying to keep my eyes off her, and seeing if she was looking at me. Inside, I was so marking the fuck out, but I figured I had to keep it together. After all, I was kind of in a kid's store. And I grabbed it, and I closed my eyes, almost expecting to hear her scoff, or make fun of me or something like that. My mind was like, "Ah, shit, damn you inner mark." I tried to look at it cool and calmly, almost as if I wasn't buying it for myself. And she looks up and she says, "ooh, that's a nice choice"

That caught me completely the fuck off guard. I almost jumped at the sound of that. and I'm a relatively average guy... I looked like such a moron. So I tried to sheepishly make out, "Thanks. I'm buying it for my brother, but he used to be a favorite of mine." I realized my voice was a bit high, so I cleared my throat, and tried to go back to my regular voice. I asked her, "You, uh, you watch the show?"

"Yeah, I did. When I was a kid..." Aw, shit, here we go. She was about to tear me a fucking new one, and I could see it coming. But then she thought for a second, and said "Actually, it wasn't too long ago. It's just... You know, it's not the same anymore."

From there, I went into about how it could be the same, just in a bit of a different direction. No matter what, it's going to same relatively close to how it used to be, and that it was still the same show. The only thing different was probably the faces on there. And then I realized... Oh shit, her Nerdar had to be flashing off the charts. Damn it.

But to my surprise, she just kept going on with me. "Well, I guess, but it's not the same people that I grew up with. Look at the guy you're holding. You don't see any more like him." I thought about, and thought to myself that maybe I could try something out of this, and that I wasn't dead yet, so why not keep the good luck running.

"Well, I guess you could look at it that way. But until you give the idea a chance, you're never going to know. I mean, at least give the idea a shot. Sometimes the best things you find are things that you wouldn't give a second look to normally." And here's where it took every bit of nerve that I had, and would probably have made a jackass out of myself. "I mean, sometimes, the goof that's looking at the Earthquake doll with an out of style T-Shirt may be a kind of nice guy."

I never do much self deprecating humor for flirting, but I went with it this time, and almost immediately regretted it. Damn it, wrong turn. But she laughed. It wasn't the world's funniest thing, but she still gave a giggle about it. Pretty cute giggle, I thought. Then, she smirked a little bit, and said, "Well, if the goof looking with the out of style T-Shirt looking at the Earthquake doll is nice, then those other things tend to fade away."

And this is where I had to grow a set. "Well, I guess that depends, on if you gave that goof a try."

She smiled and said, "Who said I wouldn't?"

..... ....

So, she gave that goof a try, and walked with me through the mall the rest of the day. Plans were made for dinner on Tuesday... And I'm pretty much stunned...

John Tenta fucking got me a date

 

[Mr. Steve]

Yes, I said that coorectly.... John Tenta, of all people, in action figure form, actually got me a date This Tuesday.

First, a little update.... Threesome chick has been a thing of the past for a couple days. After a little talk with NorCal, I realized that the road this chick and I were going down just wasn't going to work, and we're best just going our separate ways. She's donezo, and has been since... Well, I guess it was last Monday, wasn't it. NorCal, I know you're on your WZ summit, but if you get a chance to read this, thank you so much.

Now then, today I was at the mall. Admittedly, I was a little bummed, and today was a day I neither had work nor summer class. So I decided to get everyone from everyone for a little while, and just go the mall and chill. Didn't think I was going to buy anything or shit, but just to be by myself. Anyway, I'm hanging out, and see this advertisement for WWE Classic Superstar action figures. I didn't even know they made these fucking things, but damn it if it didn't perk my curiosity. And so I walk in, trying to look real casual, because it's mainly a bunch of six year olds and their parents. The clerk gave me a pretty funny look. Anyway, I make my way over to that figure aisle, and there were two things that struck me as odd.

1. There was quite an attractive girl in the aisle, not really looking at any of the figures, but just really texting and shit. I assumed she was probably there with family, or was picking up something for a family member. But yeah, she looked about my age, (in this day and age, especially with how old I am, I have to be really careful to make sure she is my age. There's a reason for jailbait's out there) and was just texting away, not really paying any attention to the figures.

2. Lo and behold, this little beauty happened to be on sale for $7.99:

I shit you not, it was a fucking Earthquake figure. Well, I figured I had two options;

1. Buy the thing, and mark the fuck out, and look like a complete nerd in front of her.

2. Just walk away from it, and try to take the "too cool for school route", maybe saying hi as I walked by, and maybe asking her if she could help me out with something. I really didn't have much of a plan.

In the end, my inner mark won out. I tried to be composed and such as I went to the figure, trying to keep my eyes off her, and seeing if she was looking at me. Inside, I was so marking the fuck out, but I figured I had to keep it together. After all, I was kind of in a kid's store. And I grabbed it, and I closed my eyes, almost expecting to hear her scoff, or make fun of me or something like that. My mind was like, "Ah, shit, damn you inner mark." I tried to look at it cool and calmly, almost as if I wasn't buying it for myself. And she looks up and she says, "ooh, that's a nice choice"

That caught me completely the fuck off guard. I almost jumped at the sound of that. and I'm a relatively average guy... I looked like such a moron. So I tried to sheepishly make out, "Thanks. I'm buying it for my brother, but he used to be a favorite of mine." I realized my voice was a bit high, so I cleared my throat, and tried to go back to my regular voice. I asked her, "You, uh, you watch the show?"

"Yeah, I did. When I was a kid..." Aw, shit, here we go. She was about to tear me a fucking new one, and I could see it coming. But then she thought for a second, and said "Actually, it wasn't too long ago. It's just... You know, it's not the same anymore."

From there, I went into about how it could be the same, just in a bit of a different direction. No matter what, it's going to same relatively close to how it used to be, and that it was still the same show. The only thing different was probably the faces on there. And then I realized... Oh shit, her Nerdar had to be flashing off the charts. Damn it.

But to my surprise, she just kept going on with me. "Well, I guess, but it's not the same people that I grew up with. Look at the guy you're holding. You don't see any more like him." I thought about, and thought to myself that maybe I could try something out of this, and that I wasn't dead yet, so why not keep the good luck running.

"Well, I guess you could look at it that way. But until you give the idea a chance, you're never going to know. I mean, at least give the idea a shot. Sometimes the best things you find are things that you wouldn't give a second look to normally." And here's where it took every bit of nerve that I had, and would probably have made a jackass out of myself. "I mean, sometimes, the goof that's looking at the Earthquake doll with an out of style T-Shirt may be a kind of nice guy."

I never do much self deprecating humor for flirting, but I went with it this time, and almost immediately regretted it. Damn it, wrong turn. But she laughed. It wasn't the world's funniest thing, but she still gave a giggle about it. Pretty cute giggle, I thought. Then, she smirked a little bit, and said, "Well, if the goof looking with the out of style T-Shirt looking at the Earthquake doll is nice, then those other things tend to fade away."

And this is where I had to grow a set. "Well, I guess that depends, on if you gave that goof a try."

She smiled and said, "Who said I wouldn't?"

..... ....

So, she gave that goof a try, and walked with me through the mall the rest of the day. Plans were made for dinner on Tuesday... And I'm pretty much stunned...

John Tenta fucking got me a date

lol congratulations. You might be the only person of this forum to pull off a date with the assist given by a John Tenta action figure. Congrats again, mate.

 

[Slyfox696]

Not bad.

If you had told her, though, that you post on an Internet wrestling forum with a gimmick of that very action figure, you would have gotten a blowjob right there in the mall.


Not bad, but you missed a great chance.

 

[The Legendary 23]

This story warmed my heart.

 

[Tenta]

Not bad.

If you had told her, though, that you post on an Internet wrestling forum with a gimmick of that very action figure, you would have gotten a blowjob right there in the mall.


Not bad, but you missed a great chance.

LOLZ, that's a good point. But if I showed her that.... she might start getting into some older posts... and some older stories...

And some older stories should REALLY stay in the past

 

[It's...Baylariat!]

That's unreal. The fact that you kept it together like that was a wonder. With my ex, mind you, she had no idea I was a wrestling fan, I seen the Brainbusters WWE Classic Figure set at a Wal-Mart. I freaked all the hell out. She made fun for about two hours...because I bought it. We ended up fighting and NOT having sex that night.

You're story's much, much better.

 

[Tenta]

lol congratulations. You might be the only person of this forum to pull off a date with the assist given by a John Tenta action figure. Congrats again, mate.

I almost want to take that to Captain Morgan's and see if they want to make a commercial off of that.

Steve, you could get a date with the Snake gimmick. Just might involve some chloroform.... Kidding!

 

[Bernkastel]

nice... who knows, if she returns to being a fan of the product you'll have that much more in common with her

 

[Slyfox696]

LOLZ, that's a good point. But if I showed her that.... she might start getting into some older posts... and some older stories...

And some older stories should REALLY stay in the past

Plus, I guess you have to save something for the second date...

 

[Tenta]

That's unreal. The fact that you kept it together like that was a wonder. With my ex, mind you, she had no idea I was a wrestling fan, I seen the Brainbusters WWE Classic Figure set at a Wal-Mart. I freaked all the hell out. She made fun for about two hours...because I bought it. We ended up fighting and NOT having sex that night.

You're story's much, much better.

LOZ, I know, man. I'm just as stunned. And my mind was able to do it, but my body was shaking, I could feel it.

MTFO on the Brainbusters though. Was it both of them together? I might try and go find one.

I mean, it all deoends on the girl in the aisle. That's why you can always try to find a wrestling fan. I think I might've

 

[Mr. Steve]

I almost want to take that to Captain Morgan's and see if they want to make a commercial off of that.

Steve, you could get a date with the Snake gimmick. Just might involve some chloroform.... Kidding!

lulz go to a mall dressed in battle gear with an eye patch and a pack of cigs. Hiding in boxes and shit.

I could totally pull it off, no sweat....Kidding!

 

[It's...Baylariat!]

The WWE needs a Stan Hansen WWE Classic Superstar figure.

 

[Tenta]

Plus, I guess you have to save something for the second date...

LOL, I'm actually considering that.... anyone want in if she's got friends?

 

[Tenta]

The WWE needs a Stan Hansen WWE Classic Superstar figure.

Hell Yeah, they do, man! You know Vince, though, if he didn't create it...

He could do a whole line with Stan, Sting, Misawa, Big daddy, all the guys he never had, man. I'd love that.

 

[Dave]

Wow Tenta I am impressed for two reasons. Firstly, even in the bar room, you're posts are longer than most people on here. Secondly because that is just awesome news. My last two girlfriends hated wrestling so you got yourself a real catch there my man, enjoy that shit whilst you can.

However, here's two reasons that you cannot go on the dinner date. Firstly, what woman likes wrestling that isn't Becca? No woman, that's who. In my mind, she uses that aisle to get people like you. She prowls it, on her phone to her crack dealer as she stands there waiting for awesome guys like yourself to walk in there to get an action figure. Once the crack dealer has the all clear, she goes about tempting you with goodies until she gets you where she wants you. This dinner date is going to be bad for you. She is going to kill you, grind you up and all of her crack-addled friends are going to inject into their systems, your remains will be buried in her back garden in a shallow, watery grave. Secondly, if you start seeing this girl, then you wont be back here all the time and I can't handle that shit.



I'm kidding. Go for it dude. She sounds like a keeper.

 

[The Doctor]

SHIT, dude! congrats! That is so goddamn awesome I cannot begin to comprehend it. Man, you're lucky.
That is seriously the coolest thing I have heard in a long time.

 

[Mr. Steve]

Wow Tenta I am impressed for two reasons. Firstly, even in the bar room, you're posts are longer than most people on here. Secondly because that is just awesome news. My last two girlfriends hated wrestling so you got yourself a real catch there my man, enjoy that shit whilst you can.

However, here's two reasons that you cannot go on the dinner date. Firstly, what woman likes wrestling that isn't Becca? No woman, that's who. In my mind, she uses that aisle to get people like you. She prowls it, on her phone to her crack dealer as she stands there waiting for awesome guys like yourself to walk in there to get an action figure. Once the crack dealer has the all clear, she goes about tempting you with goodies until she gets you where she wants you. This dinner date is going to be bad for you. She is going to kill you, grind you up and all of her crack-addled friends are going to inject into their systems, your remains will be buried in her back garden in a shallow, watery grave. Secondly, if you start seeing this girl, then you wont be back here all the time and I can't handle that shit.



I'm kidding. Go for it dude. She sounds like a keeper.

holy shit scots! almost choked in my sandwich because of that lol

 

[ztwhite]

You need to send Bill Behrens an email (the WZ news site guy) and see if he knows how to get ahold of John Tenta. He represents dozens of former wrestlers and may have the hook up.

Anywho... Mr. Tenta needs to be sent a letter detailing your story and you need to provide the man with a massive thanks.

But I would only suggest doing so after the date. She may wind up being crazy.

 

[It's...Baylariat!]

Hell Yeah, they do, man! You know Vince, though, if he didn't create it...

He could do a whole line with Stan, Sting, Misawa, Big daddy, all the guys he never had, man. I'd love that.

Hansen had a cup o' coffee in the WWF. He wrestled Bruno Sammartino for the belt in that famous botch where The Lariat broke his neck. He was managed by Classie Freddie Blassie, which I found hilarious. But seriously, if he did a figure on Hansen, or Bruiser Brody...I'd MTFO wherever I was.

 

[Tenta]

Wow Tenta I am impressed for two reasons. Firstly, even in the bar room, you're posts are longer than most people on here. Secondly because that is just awesome news. My last two girlfriends hated wrestling so you got yourself a real catch there my man, enjoy that shit whilst you can.

However, here's two reasons that you cannot go on the dinner date. Firstly, what woman likes wrestling that isn't Becca? No woman, that's who. In my mind, she uses that aisle to get people like you. She prowls it, on her phone to her crack dealer as she stands there waiting for awesome guys like yourself to walk in there to get an action figure. Once the crack dealer has the all clear, she goes about tempting you with goodies until she gets you where she wants you. This dinner date is going to be bad for you. She is going to kill you, grind you up and all of her crack-addled friends are going to inject into their systems, your remains will be buried in her back garden in a shallow, watery grave. Secondly, if you start seeing this girl, then you wont be back here all the time and I can't handle that shit.



I'm kidding. Go for it dude. She sounds like a keeper.

LOLZ, thanks Thunder. I may be gone for a bit, but I'll spend my afternoons here. As for Tuesday... I dunno what to do about the JTMFTG .

I hope she's a keeper.... I've been striking out. Lariat, you were so right on this threesome chick, in the way that I shouldn't have messed with it. Should've listened to you

 

[It's...Baylariat!]

You need to send Bill Behrens an email (the WZ news site guy) and see if he knows how to get ahold of John Tenta. He represents dozens of former wrestlers and may have the hook up.

Anywho... Mr. Tenta needs to be sent a letter detailing your story and you need to provide the man with a massive thanks.

But I would only suggest doing so after the date. She may wind up being crazy.

John Tenta passed away a while back. Right?

 

[Tenta]

Hansen had a cup o' coffee in the WWF. He wrestled Bruno Sammartino for the belt in that famous botch where The Lariat broke his neck. He was managed by Classie Freddie Blassie, which I found hilarious. But seriously, if he did a figure on Hansen, or Bruiser Brody...I'd MTFO wherever I was.

Dude, I think we'd both be in line to but those fucking figures. i forgot about Brody. Shit, Vince needs to make these fucking things. I can just see it now... Us, with half an hour of figures underneath our arms

 

[Tenta]

John Tenta passed away a while back. Right?

Yes, he passed, unfortunately, due to cancer. Maybe I could send it to his family, or something

 

[Slyfox696]

You need to send Bill Behrens an email (the WZ news site guy) and see if he knows how to get ahold of John Tenta. He represents dozens of former wrestlers and may have the hook up.

Anywho... Mr. Tenta needs to be sent a letter detailing your story and you need to provide the man with a massive thanks.

But I would only suggest doing so after the date. She may wind up being crazy.

Uhh, he died. Cancer. Like 3 years ago.

 

[Mr. Steve]

John Tenta passed away a while back. Right?

yeah, he did? he died in '06. Tenta's looking out for you, Mastodon.