IC25 Needs Advice...I know, strange, right?

[IrishCanadian25]

The facts: I hate strip clubs. I've never been a fan. I have been to one strip club in my life (I was 19) and I hated it. It was seedy and just left me feeling uncomfortable. And that was when I was single. I will be married 1 year in October.

The scenario: A good friend of mine is getting married next month, and his two best men (both of whom I am not particularly fond of) are setting up his bachelor party. The e-mail pretty clearly stated the involvement of 'tits' in the event, so it's pretty much assumed that it's going to be a strip club event.

My problem: Do I ditch my good friends' bachelor party on principle? Or do I suck it up (stop laughing) and go?

 

[The Doctor]

It seems like if you go you'll have a really shitty time with people you don't like. Why make yourself unhappy? Be a man and stand up for your principles. That's what I'd say.

 

[Smooth Sexual Chocolate]

It all depends on how much you care for this "good friend". Personally I'm no fan of strip clubs either, but I have a select group of friends that I would suck it up for simply to support them.

It basically comes down to how good of a friend he has been to you, if you for any reason feel you should be there to support him than I would just suck it up and go.

 

[Via Armbar]

A true friend would understand your absence. Or, be present for as long as you feel comfortable and make a respectable exit when you feel you should call it a night.

 

[X]

I'm baffled as to how someone could not enjoy a strip club. Unless of course it was a shitty strip club, then yeah you'll never want to return again, there's one REALLY seedy club up in Providence that I shit you not has a dancer with an EYE PATCH. Not for fashion either, like she's missing an eye. I'll never forget how hilarious that was.

But yeah, if you go to a good club, I don't understand how you could possibly have a bad time. You don't have to shove your face in their tits or anything, just sit back and have some drinks with your buddies while admiring some fine females. You'll have a great time.

 

[The People's Peep]

I gotta agree with SSC. It really depends on how good of a friend he is. If he is one of your best friends, I would say suck it up and be there to support your friend. If he isnt that important of a friend, I wouldnt worry about missing the party.

 

[HBK-aholic]

I'd say blame it on your wife, but she seems too cool to say you can't go .

 

[Stormtrooper]

3 things:

1. Maybe it isn't a strip club, and they are just getting a stripper for a private party. That (depending on your tastes) may be worse then a strip club. Also, maybe the strip club you went to when you were 19 was a shit strip club (likely, since it probably wasn't a 21+, since you were underage), and another club would make you feel somewhat more comfortable. I honestly have no idea, since I have never been to a strip club, but that's my guess.

2. Tell your wife that your attendance was requested at a Bachelor Party, and see what she says. If she says you can go (and is made aware of the presence of exposed sweater-puppets) and if you feel like going, go, and enjoy the show. If she says no, then decline the invitation. If you tell the Groom-to-be that the wife said no, maybe he'll realize that he loses free will once he gets married (if he hasn't realized it already).

3. If you don't like the best men, and the only person whom you would enjoy the company of would be the groom-to-be, then don't go, because the Groom-to-be will be very preoccupied with the strippers and everyone else. When you tell them you aren't going, be honest and say that I won't have a good time, so I'm not going. You can always just find a time to hang with the groom-to-be and have your own 2-man Bachelor Party filled with whatever you 2 like to do.

 

[The Brain]

I understand where you're coming from IC. I have never been to a strip club and have no intention on going to one. My friends used to go all the time and asked me to go with. After turning them down many times they came to respect my decision and quit asking. I like the ladies as much as anyone, but those places just aren't for me. I don't have any problem whatsoever if that's what some people like to do. We all have our own opinions and we should all be respectful of what others do or don't want to do. The only reason I would consider going in your situation is if the groom to be really wants you there, but if he really is a good friend he should understand if you don't want to go. Like Trooper said, he'll probably be too preoccupied to notice if you'r there or not.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Irish, you strike me as the sort of guy who'd talk to the strippers. Not in a Jake ''No, what's the point in having a dance off you? What am I supposed to do with the erection?'' kinda way. But the sort of person who'd want to know the real Candy Sweet Cheeks. ''Facebook me'', ''Oh, I will. Say hello to Darren and the kids for me''.

 

[DirtyJosé]

Back in 02', I went to San Francisco with some friends, including a co-worker who swore he knew the best places. This was my first strip club trip. Well, his "best place" was some shady place on Market St. that left even me feeling a bit filthy. I don't blame you for not wanting to return after an experience like that.

As for the party, are they planning on going out, or hiring a dancer to come to a party? I think you'd probably have a more comfortable experience outside of a dirty club, unless your hangup is about strippers in general and not necessarily the club.

 

[Cena's Little Helper]

The facts: I hate strip clubs. I've never been a fan. I have been to one strip club in my life (I was 19) and I hated it. It was seedy and just left me feeling uncomfortable. And that was when I was single. I will be married 1 year in October.

The scenario: A good friend of mine is getting married next month, and his two best men (both of whom I am not particularly fond of) are setting up his bachelor party. The e-mail pretty clearly stated the involvement of 'tits' in the event, so it's pretty much assumed that it's going to be a strip club event.

My problem: Do I ditch my good friends' bachelor party on principle? Or do I suck it up (stop laughing) and go?

Why don't you go ask your wife, asshole?

 

[It's Damn Real!]

Fuckin' bail, IC, and just come up with a fantastic excuse. Then tell your buddy (the one you like) that you'll make it up to him by buying him a few rounds on you. Problem solved.

 

[Smooth Sexual Chocolate]

Back in 02', I went to San Francisco with some friends, including a co-worker who swore he knew the best places. This was my first strip club trip. Well, his "best place" was some shady place on Market St. that left even me feeling a bit filthy. I don't blame you for not wanting to return after an experience like that.

As for the party, are they planning on going out, or hiring a dancer to come to a party? I think you'd probably have a more comfortable experience outside of a dirty club, unless your hangup is about strippers in general and not necessarily the club.

You talking about Centerfolds Dirty? My padre owns an apartment in North Beach, literally a half a block from Coit Tower, and two blocks from market street. To say I've hosted some crazy parties with my close friends would be an understatement. One night a couple of them wondered off to the Strip Clubs on market, they got so wasted they couldn't find their way back (2 blocks mind you) and the two of us who didn't wonder off had to search for their dumb asses the next morning. They ended up in a park down by Fishermans Warf, sleeping with the homeless, good fucking times.

 

[DirtyJosé]

Oh no, not the nicer ones by North Beach. The shitty ones in the SOMA area. Dirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrty fucking holes in the wall.

 

[Dr. Stinger A. Zoidberg]

3 things:

1. Maybe it isn't a strip club, and they are just getting a stripper for a private party. That (depending on your tastes) may be worse then a strip club. Also, maybe the strip club you went to when you were 19 was a shit strip club (likely, since it probably wasn't a 21+, since you were underage), and another club would make you feel somewhat more comfortable. I honestly have no idea, since I have never been to a strip club, but that's my guess.

2. Tell your wife that your attendance was requested at a Bachelor Party, and see what she says. If she says you can go (and is made aware of the presence of exposed sweater-puppets) and if you feel like going, go, and enjoy the show. If she says no, then decline the invitation. If you tell the Groom-to-be that the wife said no, maybe he'll realize that he loses free will once he gets married (if he hasn't realized it already).

3. If you don't like the best men, and the only person whom you would enjoy the company of would be the groom-to-be, then don't go, because the Groom-to-be will be very preoccupied with the strippers and everyone else. When you tell them you aren't going, be honest and say that I won't have a good time, so I'm not going. You can always just find a time to hang with the groom-to-be and have your own 2-man Bachelor Party filled with whatever you 2 like to do.

He hit the nail on the head with this one.

 

[Via Armbar]

Almost everything is shitty/dirty in the Soma area.

 

[D-Man]

I also hate strip clubs. But avoiding the party because you just don't prefer them is about as selfish as you can get. Suck it up, deal with the things that irk you out about the place, and support your friend. You need to ask yourself if they would do the same thing for you. That's your answer right there.

 

[DirtyJosé]

Almost everything is shitty/dirty in the Soma area.

Pretty much.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Do not go.

If someone will pressure you to go against your principles, they are not your friend. Anyone who knows me, wouldn't even ask.

Do not go.

 

[D-Man]

Do not go.

If someone will pressure you to go against your principles, they are not your friend. Anyone who knows me, wouldn't even ask.

Do not go.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you think he shouldn't go...

Seriously though, I think it depends on how close of a friend this guy is to you. I mean, I can understand if you're Howie Mandel and a germaphobe or something. But not attending a friend's bachelor party because you personally don't prefer strip clubs? Sometimes we need to do things for others even if it isn't in our personal preference.

 

[Phoenix]

Stand your grounds sir, any friend who is a good friend will respect your rights and feelings. You can always make up for missing it with something awesome!

 

[Mighty NorCal]

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you think he shouldn't go...

Seriously though, I think it depends on how close of a friend this guy is to you. I mean, I can understand if you're Howie Mandel and a germaphobe or something. But not attending a friend's bachelor party because you personally don't prefer strip clubs? Sometimes we need to do things for others even if it isn't in our personal preference.

Its a fucking matter of principle man. He obviously doesnt like them for some reason of character. Would you guys pressure me to drink? I think not. Maybe he doesnt belive in helping his friend participate in what is actually a pretty fucked up "tradition". There are a few pretty fundamentally terrible things going on here. Its not like we are talking about someone asking him to do the dishes or take out the trash, you cant just "aw well do it FOR your friend"...

Its principle man. Do you think I wouldnt crawl over glass for you if I had to? Ok, now, would I go to a strip club with you if you reeeaallly wanted me to?

You know the answers.

 

[D-Man]

Its a fucking matter of principle man. He obviously doesnt like them for some reason of character. Would you guys pressure me to drink? I think not. Maybe he doesnt belive in helping his friend participate in what is actually a pretty fucked up "tradition". There are a few pretty fundamentally terrible things going on here. Its not like we are talking about someone asking him to do the dishes or take out the trash, you cant just "aw well do it FOR your friend"...

Its principle man. Do you think I wouldnt crawl over glass for you if I had to? Ok, now, would I go to a strip club with you if you reeeaallly wanted me to?

You know the answers.

Let's look at the difference between this situation and the ones you mentioned:

Strip clubs won't kill you. Drinking and crawling on glass will.

Sometimes, principles need to be set aside for the greater good. It won't fucking kill him to go and socialize. Where and in what rulebook does it say "You must flirt, touch, and stuff dollar bills down a stripper's crotch when you go to a strip club"? You don't. He only needs to sit in the back, socialize and be happy for his friend.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Let's look at the difference between this situation and the ones you mentioned:

Strip clubs won't kill you. Drinking and crawling on glass will.

Sometimes, principles need to be set aside for the greater good. It won't fucking kill him to go and socialize. Where and in what rulebook does it say "You must flirt, touch, and stuff dollar bills down a stripper's crotch when you go to a strip club"? You don't. He only needs to sit in the back, socialize and be happy for his friend.

THERE IS NO GREATER GOOD THAN A MAN'S PRINCIPLE. Fucking beleifs and character aren't circumstantial to conveinence.

Also, the comparison I was making wasnt literal, although I know you love to do that when I say those things.

I was making a comparison to show that you guys know I would absolutely go to the end of the earth and burn in fire for you, but I would not go against what I belive in. So then, am I selfish? No, and you guys wouldnt even go there, becuase you respect me.