I need some serious advice.

[J-Dogg]

Now i really want serious points of views from you guys on this matter.

Well here's the situation, i met a girl whose 22 and she has a 5 month old son, from the get go we've been pretty damn honest with one another, i told 3 of my best friends who are female and 2 of them said its wrong. Mind you im 20 and like most people my age still live at home, im also in the process of thinking to do a course at college and finding a new job even if its casual or part time.

And in the midst of these things in my life is this girl with a kid, and i just wanna know if any of you WZ regulars are or have been in a situation like this and how did/have you handled it.

On a side note: Because also as most of you also know is that im training to be a pro wrestler, and i also want to be able to wrestle and be in a relationship of this kind. But i also feel that i can fit wrestling around a job and a relationship, because its not like im in WWE and on the road nearly everyday of the year, and she has a good job as manager.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

I dont understand the problem

 

[Goliath Uterus]

Whatsthadill?

 

[J-Dogg]

I dont understand the problem

How does one explain this shit to family if i was to pursue a relationship is one issue, and i wanted to know how have others on here if they have been involved in a relationship were one person has a kid from a previous relationship have handled the relationship. Because im also not sure if im ready if i do decide to settle down, that i'd want to be a stepfather just now. I like kids and im becoming an uncle and godfather to my sister's kid in less than a month as well.

Like i personally dont see this as a bad move for me to be in this kind of relationship, though its uncommon for someone my age here in Australia to be involved with a girl whose still in her early 20s and has a kid.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Explain WHAT to your family?

"I like her"

there, there is your explanation

What do you mean how do you handle it? Just as you would any other relationship. Ok, so the kid is there, but shit, thats zero pressure for at least three years, becuase like fuck if the kid will remember you.

What other relationship would the kid be from? Unless its Jesus, it comes froma prior relationship

I guess I just still dont get what the big deal is. If you cant hack a baby being around, then you cant do it. If you can and you like her, then do it.

A real man can handle a baby, and like I said, its not like you have to fucking help it with math and give it the talk about the birds and the bees, its fuckign 5 months old dude

 

[Goliath Uterus]

The Mighty ones advice is spot on. Either you deal with the kid, or don't. If you like her enough than it shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Remy LaCroix]

A friend of mine is in the exact same rut. Anyways, there is nothing wrong with it, but if you do get serious, the kid will be like any other kid that a parent has to take care of. Sacrifices will be made.

 

[Milkyway!]

Seems pretty simple to me. I'm sixteen years old. My girlfriend is eighteen. My girlfriend has a 1 1/2 year old baby. I told my mother from the get go. Simple as that.

Your parents opinions should matter to you. But they can't make your decisions for you. If they do especially at your age, then get a job, save up, and move out. Simple as that.

 

[J-Dogg]

Explain WHAT to your family?

"I like her"

there, there is your explanation

What do you mean how do you handle it? Just as you would any other relationship. Ok, so the kid is there, but shit, thats zero pressure for at least three years, becuase like fuck if the kid will remember you.

What other relationship would the kid be from? Unless its Jesus, it comes froma prior relationship

I guess I just still dont get what the big deal is. If you cant hack a baby being around, then you cant do it. If you can and you like her, then do it.

A real man can handle a baby, and like I said, its not like you have to fucking help it with math and give it the talk about the birds and the bees, its fuckign 5 months old dude

Thank fuck your online, advice from you..i'll take it. Im gonna rep you as well.

 

[Goliath Uterus]

And I mean, if you're 20, than what the fuck will your parents do? If I liked a girl who had a kid (not gonna happen, but still) and my dad said I couldn't see her, I would tell him to go fuck himself, two times.

 

[Mighty NorCal]

Its just a baby, man. A mini human being. Not a fuckin time bomb

Your fine dude. No biggie.

 

[J-Dogg]

Its just a baby, man. A mini human being. Not a fuckin time bomb

Your fine dude. No biggie.

Haha, positive reassurance thanks.

 

[ScreaminNormanSmiley]

The only way i see any way there could possibley be a problem in this is if it was the the 5 month old your interested, in because that would be a little weird.

 

[PowerUp5000]

The only thing I would remind you of good sir is that you are talking about doing a number of other things in your life, and you are but 20 years old. Do you really want to get all serious and tied up with a some chick and her kid, while you are trying to pursue a new job venture, a wrestling career, and college at the same time? I would put that aside right now honestly and focus on making a life of your own, before making a life with someone else. Live a little, your young, enjoy it, you only live once(unless you Buddhist), you have plenty of time to nestle down with a family. Why not establish something for yourself first? You said you live at home still right? Well getting out in the real world for a while and trying on those shoes and seeing how you can handle that might be a smart thing to do before you go head first into something serious and get all committed as shit. In the end you shouldn't listen to me or probably anyone else, you should do what you want to do and what you think will make you happy. I only say to you now, what you think you want and what you get aren't always the same thing, and the devil you know is better than the devil you don't know.

 

[enterkey]

Its just a baby, man. A mini human being. Not a fuckin time bomb

if it starts ticking though I'd run like hell, one can never be too careful

 

[Mighty NorCal]

The only thing I would remind you of good sir is that you are talking about doing a number of other things in your life, and you are but 20 years old. Do you really want to get all serious and tied up with a some chick and her kid, while you are trying to pursue a new job venture, a wrestling career, and college at the same time? I would put that aside right now honestly and focus on making a life of your own, before making a life with someone else. Live a little, your young, enjoy it, you only live once(unless you Buddhist), you have plenty of time to nestle down with a family. Why not establish something for yourself first? You said you live at home still right? Well getting out in the real world for a while and trying on those shoes and seeing how you can handle that might be a smart thing to do before you go head first into something serious and get all committed as shit. In the end you shouldn't listen to me or probably anyone else, you should do what you want to do and what you think will make you happy. I only say to you now, what you think you want and what you get aren't always the same thing, and the devil you know is better than the devil you don't know.

What if she is the "one" though? You are going to pass that up for what amounts to no actual practical reason?

 

[J-Dogg]

Well i said i might got to college, but i've figured out i can fit wrestling training and doing wrestling shows around a casual or part time job, its not like im going to be living with her right away once we start dating that would be down the line in terms of moving in.

 

[Hawkeye]

You've found a girl that likes you despite the fact that you legit wanna wrestle...STFU and hold on tight! LOL

But seriously,if both of you want to be invested in each other,everything else will work itself out.I'm a sucker for a good love story so I know more than anyone,the road with the most resistance yields the greatest rewards.Be the man she needs in her life,be the man that kid needs in his life.Love him like his birth father won't,then eventually y'all will probably have one of your own. <3

 

[Stormtrooper]

You want serious advice? Pee in her butt (if she approves of such an activity). If she says no, then don't pee in her butt. If she says yes, then commence the butt-peeing (if that's your thing).

NorCal is right (shouldn't be surprising, in my 14 months here I don't think NorCal has ever been wrong). Who cares if she has a kid? Who cares if your parents MIGHT not approve? Are you happy with her (and vice versa)? If you hare, then be with her, and be happy. Fuck all the haters. Haters gonna hate. Happiness trumps all.

 

[Deexter Jorgan]

I have a wife and kids, I don't see an issue with it, I've been in relationships with women with kids before i got married and my parents had no issue.

The end of the day as long as this isn't a fling bro you have no issue, the kids not looking for a replacement daddy, and if mommy dearest likes you than why not.

The only thing you'll have to watch out for is that your dating a family, her and that kid, in the end that child will start to look upto you in the long run and will look at you as its male role model, so in a sense if it does get serious you need to make sure that she is right for you because if you leave you will have to explain why.

apart from that go for it, no one should say no to a relationship just because of a kid.

 

[Super Hans]

I have been in 2 relationships where there is kids involved, if you like her then just your folks im sure they will be happy for you, you are a big boy you know. If you really like her then you should pee in her butt that will show her that you are in this relationship for the long run.

 

[gd]

Don't date women with children

 

[Razor]

So what if your family is pissy about a kid? Are they going to disown you?

And so what if they did? You'd be with a woman that you like, and a 5 month old. I'm assuming that she can handle the 5 month old herself (as in she's had it taken care of up to this point) so there is zero standing obligation even 10 months down the line to stay and help her with the kid.

I guess it's just me not giving a shit if my family is pissed off and stops speaking with me. Or the fact that a kid means fuck all to me if I like the chick. Guess I get to change a few diapers.

 

[Hawkeye]

What if she is the "one" though? You are going to pass that up for what amounts to no actual practical reason?

The Mighty NorCal believes in "the one"? There's hope for us all <3

 

[Cena's Little Helper]

Tell her to fuck off. You're 20 years old, and someone that age with a kid that young whose out looking for dick is someone you do not want to be involved with in the least.