WZ, I have an issue too, and I would like your advice on said issue.
My wife's grandmother is currently visiting us. To get some quality bonding time, we went to dinner last night, just the two of us. Since my wife is currently pregnant with our first child, discussion obviously turned to the topic of sex, and this discussion unfortunately got to the point where we decided to exchange stories about our first times.
My wife's grandmother's first time went something like this (I'll tell it to you as she told it to me).
Wife's Grandmother: Honey, I was working at a Friendly's in Cambridge, MA one summer when I was 19, and this man walked in. He was wearing a crisp three piece suit, mirrored Ray Ban aviators, and gorgeous leather Oxfords. He was tall, I would guess about 6'4, with broad shoulders and a chiseled jawline that I couldn't take my eyes from, it was so smooth and clean shaven. I noticed on his suit jacket, he had the emblem of Harvard Business School. He waltzed over to me, said his name was Frans in this incredibly attractive Danish accent. I grew weak in the knees, and he knew I was his.
I lead him into the back closet, wetter than a stray dog caught in a rainstorm, ready to become a woman. He looked at me, slowly removed his Ray Bans, and said "you ready, little breh?"
Before I could even nod, he grabbed me by the throat, slammed me on the ground, unzipped his pants, and pissed right into my mouth. It was incredible. Then he left.
Me: Grandma! What the fuck are you talking about?! Did you even have sex?!
Wife's Grandmother: No, of course not, dear! I wasn't married! That would have been a sin!
Me: So you just let a random stranger piss in your mouth, and then he just left?
Wife's Grandmother: Yes, dear.
Me: Grandma, I am all sorts of wicked confused right now.
Wife's Grandmother: If you ever meet a clean cut, 6'4 HBS Nordic Bro, you'll understand.
WZ, here are the questions I pose to you. Should I tell my wife this story, especially since my grandfather, a clean cut, 6'4 HBS Nordic bro, always brags about how he once pissed in a Friendly's waitress's mouth?
