Lee
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supermod!
Lee I like this alright. The first person, almost noir style is intriguing, although sometimes I find Tituss narration a little long winded.
This was due to me originally planning it 100% Titus telling it.
Perhaps interposing traditional third person narration with first person lines of thought might have served better. At first I was a little underwhelmed by the scene, thinking that maybe you should have had a bigger thing for the world title win, but I thought about it, and I like this. Just going into an old bar to celebrate quietly. Its different, it fits the character, and I like it.
That was the aim, I did the big party with the other two title wins so this made it seem a bit more something.
Occasional writing error here and there, not massive, as always, rigorous proofreading helps, if its something you even care about.
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It is and I usually have a 24 hour rule but I was pretty rushed for time on this one.
It should also be noted that every character in this RP links to another.
Cheers for the feedback, just felt the need to defend the last one.