Someone Come and End My Aunt

[klunderbunker]

My aunt, the poster child for lazy and stupid, decided my 72 year old grandmother and 55 year old mother should share a laptop. Why you ask? "So you can get on Facebook with me!" Bear in mind the following: I own three (mostly) functioning laptops and spent the better part of three days cleaning one up for my mother to use as she needs to learn basics for her job.

My aunt gets them a brand new laptop and says "have fun! Tommy (me) can set it up for you!" Well shockingly enough, my grandmother and mom are at each others throats over where to put it, what they're supposed to use it for (upon hearing what Facebook was, my grandmother decided it sounded stupid) and where it was supposed to go. Somehow I lost a laptop out of this and am being yelled at for being selfish and for having bad computers at the same time (one is incredibly slow and one has a broken monitor).

And all the while my aunt complains that I don't have it set up yet and that I need to move faster. Someone come end her for me. Money is no object and you'll do the human race a favor.

 

[Uncle Phatso]

Kb it sounds like you need the mob.

 

[Remix]

What medication is she on?

 

[Slyfox696]

If you need help (with the computers, not the violence), let me know.

 

[Coco]

I'll end all three of them for you. Sounds like that would solve even more problems.

 

[klunderbunker]

What medication is she on?

My aunt? That would be the "I'm a fat lazy slob that allegedly has some condition where the attention has to be on me or I get depressed and I spend my son's anti-mental condition money on manicures and pedicures because I'm 42 years old but think I'm 26 and I've had more cosmetic surgery than some small cities combined and I sit on Facebook all day because it makes me feel young and I pretend everyone likes me when everyone hates my guts" medication.

 

[klunderbunker]

If you need help (with the computers, not the violence), let me know.

Actually I used the list of programs you have in the VG and T section already on them. The computers downstairs (the old/slow ones) I don't use other than to run my wireless through and for my iTunes. They aren't worth the money/effort/time to fix up. Appreciate the offer though.

 

[Serious Mozzarella]

My aunt? That would be the "I'm a fat lazy slob that allegedly has some condition where the attention has to be on me or I get depressed and I spend my son's anti-mental condition money on manicures and pedicures because I'm 42 years old but think I'm 26 and I've had more cosmetic surgery than some small cities combined and I sit on Facebook all day because it makes me feel young and I pretend everyone likes me when everyone hates my guts" medication.

Who... prescribed that?

 

[klunderbunker]

Latest turn of events and to give you an idea of what I'm dealing with.

Mom: Tommy come show us how to find stuff on the internet.

KB: Ok first you go to this. It's called Google.

Mom: No we want the internet. Not the Googler thing.

 

[Ty Burna]

Quietly or brutally?

 

[Coco]

Alternative: Kill yourself. I promise that none of your annoying relatives will every bother you again.

Wait: Don't kill yourself. Let some troll do it. Like BILL LESNAR.

 

[Remix]

Who... prescribed that?

It's available OTC.

 

[Big Nick Dudley]

Facebook (internet in general) and older people. Utter shit. I have deleted every family member over the age of 40, and it caused quite the stir.

 

[TSG]

Facebook (internet in general) and older people. Utter shit. I have deleted every family member over the age of 40, and it caused quite the stir.

Just make sure you stop using it once you hit forty.

 

[Tha Wolfpac]

I could call The whole Wolfpac, we are known to fuck shit up.

 

[Final Form Snyper.]

Klunder didnt you want us to kill another family member back in the day? I'd just do it myself and save the potential costs of hiring a hit man/woman or savage cricket.

 

[ABMorales787]

You're asking us? You're the admin. Perma-ban her.

 

[Mr. Artistic guy]

My aunt sometimes comments on my facebook status......

Hook me up if you need help (with the violence, not the computers).

 

[ThUnDeRpHoEnIx]

I made a point of deleting every family member on facebook who was over 18 at the time.Now if they're over 18 I decline.I had an aunt who told my parents I was swearing when i said crap.My parents did nothing.They laughed.

On the violence though.Intresting concept.Pay for my airfares and i'll do it?

 

[Muffin Top Merkley]

I gave up Facebook years ago. Too much drama and hassle for my liking.

 

[gd]

Neither of my parents have laptops. Be happy with what you have.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Twenty pounds and a packet of Rolos.

 

[J-Dogg]

I have none of my family members on Facebook.

 

[Pepe Silvia]

How do you argue over where to put a laptop

shit it's not on the desk anymore how the fuck will it work now