Haiku Hogan Presents: Random Pointless Tournament Predictions

[Con T.]

The Offs:

So, let's begin with the characters who are "off". Now surely some of you have been to Vegas, and seen "Off" next to a betting line for a game. Not that I partake, mind you....

But what does that "off" mean? It means, simply enough, that the bookmakers have extenuating circumstances that make it impossible to put a reasonable line on a gamble. It could be from any number of reasons; injury, status, etc. and for extenuating circumstances, we have to call an off on the following characters;

Joey Sexton (Off)

Momentum: -
Potential: -
Rankings: (30, 28, 27, 28)

Synopsis: We know next to nothing about Joey Sexton; that's pretty much all I can say at the moment. We do know he's going with a Joey Ryan styled gimmick, and that he flirts with the backstage interviewers (and Leon thought it was bad with Zeus).

That's about it. The gimmick can go either one of two ways:

A. Sleazy for the sake of sleaze, which will mean Sexton will struggle to gain momentum.

B. Acting out because of an experience in his past, which could be pretty interesting.

From reading his application, I find this line interesting.

Joey Sexton was not always the Sexcellent One that you and I know and love. He began his career as the generic (cleanly-shaven) babyface Skip Rogers, working for various independent promotions in his home country of Canada. However, when he learned that his girlfriend had been cheating on him with the top guys in each territory, he underwent a metamorphosis and Skip Rogers was no more

See, this shows me we could get a lot of backstory about the corruption of Skip Rogers, and that could make for an interesting take on heartbreak changing a person. That, to me, is real interesting. But we have to see where he goes with this first. The potential could be there, but if the plan is to become Joey Ryan 2.0 (sleaze for the sake of sleaze) then Thrash and Angel may have a new punching bag. For now, I'm not expecting much.

Theron Dragonshield (Off)

Momentum: -
Potential: -
Rankings: (29, 29, 29)

From a character I can see going two ways, we have a character that can go a million ways. Theron is a character that, by the very nature of his character, can do hundreds of things. If he wanted his RP's to take place in his head, while playing his board, it could be trip to Adventure Time, re-enacting his board game in this massive quest. Or it could just be a guy and his friends playing board games. There are no boundaries to this hara tee, so if I had to give a ranking based on potential, it would be probably be based in the teens.

Can the gimmick work? Of course it can; it's intriguing to see. Personally, I'm hoping for the character that dreams his board games events to reality. I can also see from the sample RP that he's going to use the board game while he promos. That could be more difficult, especially if it relies on rolled dice. But I'd like to see where this goes.

Off.... But...:

These are the characters I can't place odds on. Tht said, it wouldn't shock me in the least to watch them do severe damage in the tournament. The RP'ers, we know very very well. But with new gimmicks, the fuck can we expect? Honestly, I don't know. But I am excited. These are the ones to not bet, but if you want to be the guy that "called it", give these guys a shot.

Bobby Adams

Momentum: -
Potential: 18th
Rankings: (20, 16, 22)

For those that don't know, this is Dave. We know nothing about Bobby Adams, other than he's a very nice guy. But we do know that this is Constantine, and we do know the RP'ers skill is exceptional.

For all intents and purposes, this character seems like Jimmy Flynn (come on, they even come from bordering states). I think Dave really wants to see what he can do with a humbler character, and that isn't a problem by me. This is the type of thing where it depends how long it takes him to get on track. If he can develop a pattern quickly, he could do really well. But it may take time for that momentum to kick in. Otherwise, I'd case Bobby Adams as a "sleeping giant" (what? More on that later)

Dr. Coberer

Momentum: -
Potential: 10th
Rankings: (17, 25, 25)

Whereas Bobby Adams seems more reserved, this character is intense. Remember how people were sussing about Zeus when g first came into the fed?

Well, I'm sussing about this. Nu Sexier Noun has had plenty of success in the fed as well, and this character seems extremely dangerous. You have to be a dark, twisted, demented kinda guy to write a doctor like this...

... What? What's everyone looking at?

I'm excited to see what Nu Sexier goes with here. It appears he likes to use other elements in his RP's, and I welcome it all. Much like Bobby, it's a question of when he hits his stride. And when he does, this could be a difficult out for anyone.

Tomorrow: The "Needs Improvement" People. All people who should see this tournament as a chance to get a win.

 

[Da Prophet]

My prediction is Justin Cooper.

He will certainly make the final of this tournament.

 

[Con T.]

Needs Inprovement

So, these are the wrestlers that, frankly, shouldn't be worried about making plans for their family to come see them at Redemption. Mama Paradyse, we can tell you now that your boy will not be going for the #1 contenders spot. Sorry, Mama.

But, a note though: just because you don't think you'll win, doesn't mean you should compete. If you want to compete, just do it. I had my doubts, too, but seriously, what do you have to lose by competing in the tournament?

Well, besides a match. But let's move on, shall we?

25. The Angel: (99/1)

Momentum: 24th
Potential: 22nd
Rankings: (24, 24, 22, 23, 21, 25, 25, 24)

Synopsis: it was actually a tight race between you and the man who takes the 24th spot. Understand, we all know you're going somewhere new, and we all want to see where you take it.

That said, you're also the only person in the fed to give Dustin Hunter a win, and with a tie for the most last place votes, we're sad to say that a lengthy run in this tournament isn't expected. Though this may give you a chance to further your own story. Just make sure you- wait, I'm going to make sure you see this.

Make sure you stick to that fecking story!


And, hey, look at all that screen time you get at WZ weekend. Both as a wrestler, and a human dart.

24. Dustin Hunter: (98.5/1)

Momentum: 23rd
Potential: 21st
Rankings: Dustin Hunter (22, 24, 24, 24, 23, 25, 23, 25)

Understand this; you aren't last for two reasons;

1. The gimmick sees some potential (as others have intimated on this board, as has the panel, to some extent)
2. You beat Angel two rounds ago.

That's about the only reasons. But that doesn't mean there's no room for growth. On the contrary, there's plenty. Making sure that you stick to a theme in your RPs, and not letting your ideas go ass over teakettle, is the best way to seize that potential. Being in the tournament can provide some help, at the least giving you a chance to show the fed you can keep it simple, and not go everywhere.

23. Thrash: (95/1)

Momentum: 25th
Potential: 25th
Rankings: (16, 22, 22, 22, 25, 23, 25, 23)

You might wonder why there's 25th rankings for you above, no? I can explain it.

1. No showing at KC will stall all of the momentum possible.

2. I don't know where Thrash can go next.

I mean that in the best way possible, because you're a very nice guy. I just want to see what you can do with Thrash after what could be described as an abysmal KC cycle. But, you also did run into

A. Zeus
B. Sandy

That was never going to be easy, no matter what. But it's time to add a hook to Thrash, make him stand out from the crowd. Maybe he could write song lyrics for his matches, maybe he can booze and binge to his heart's content. Something to differentiate him. My PM box is always open, if you need help.

22. Jimmy Flynn: (90/1)

Momentum: 22nd
Potential: 23rd
Rankings: (23, 25, 23, 23, 23, 23, 24, 21)

Here's what Shotaro had to say about Jimmy Flynn:

28. Jimmy Flynn - MM Soldier can be great. This character just isn't and his lengthy losing streak proves it.

You know why I included Shotaro's post, when you can just as easily go back to read it? Because I got nothing. I'm sorry, Jimmy Flynn doesn't compel me. It's just not there for me, and I don't think for anyone else. I really think if you were to include a personal life to Jimmy, beyond the ring, it could help. DC did it with Lindsey, and look what that's done for him.

Jimmy needs to introduce us to more than the weights and the gym. He has to introduce us a reason to be compelled. Because just being Jimmy Flynn isn't helping.

21. Ricky Runn: (85/1)

Momentum: 21st
Potential: 18th
Rankings: (15, 19, 21, 16, 21, 19, 20, 23)

Oh, Ricky, Ticky, Ricky Tunn.

How did you get here? Losses, and a butt load of them. Granted, those losses came to TSA and Isabel Stone. But I think it's more than that; I think the gimmick is actually getting a little played out.

And no, that doesn't mean turning to swag yolo, please don't do that.

When you use swag yolo, your push stunts

When your push stunts, the pressure gets heavy

When the pressure gets heavy, you get lost in rap music

When you get lost in rap music, you include rappers in your RPs

When you use rappers, you wind up with no one and having to use Soulja Boy

When you use Soulja Boy, creative makes Ricky get a cavity check.

Don't let Ricky get cavity checked (again)

That's all for today. Tomorrow, we will tackle the one, and dones

 

[gd]

Ricky should use Future instead next time

 

[JGlass]

Actually Ricky Runn's new swag yolo gimmick has us bursting with ideas. It's going to make it super easy for us to write him and I hope he sticks with it for a good long while.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

I'd just like to point out that it was this guy right here that suggested Ricky become a swag kid while we were playing Battlefield late one night.

 

[Con T.]

I'd just like to point out that it was this guy right here that suggested Ricky become a swag kid while we were playing Battlefield late one night.

.....

Oh, I feel less bad about Mikey Stormrage being where he is...

 

[Viola Moonlight]

I'd just like to point out that it was this guy right here that suggested Ricky become a swag kid while we were playing Battlefield late one night.

So apparently we have a new creative position open.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

.....

Oh, I feel less bad about Mikey Stormrage being where he is...

Meh, I know I'm capable of success. I have a decent list of wins to prove it, but the TSA feud took nearly an entire calender year, it wore on me and I ran out of steam. I deserve my position as midcarder.

So apparently we have a new creative position open.

Oh you mad cause I'm styling on you?

 

[Viola Moonlight]

Oh you mad cause I'm styling on you?

You're no Rarity, sugar cube.

 

[Con T.]

One and Done

These are the folks that, given a good break, they could wind up a getting a win in the bracket. Anything else, though, might be greedy. These are the characters that still have traction, but can't be considered favorites, for one reason or another.

20. Alex Bowen: 80/1

Momentum: 20th
Potential: 15th
Rankings: (13, 18, 11, 21, 17, 20, 22, 21)

The only thing keeping Bowen away from a higher ranking is a mixture if losses, and seemingly a lack of ideas. Bowen can be very good; correct me if I'm wrong, but he was one of the last remaining members of the main event of Kigdom Come IV. I know he's looking for an idea, but I also do Nightmare has propositioned him with an idea, as well. Not try and lead anyone anywhere, but if you don't have an idea, and someone's offering some, I'd take that person up on the offer.

After all, Dustin Hunter may not be the best. But what do you have to lose, really?

19. Grizzly Bob: 75/1
Momentum: 18th
Potential: 16th
Rankings: (19, 9, 10, 20, 17, 21, 18, 21)

Grizzly is putting or very good RPs, and seems to have some steam left in the character. That isn't the problem at all. I think Grizzly just needs to find his niche just a little more. He's getting there, but I think a stay with the Mayhem division could help. Grizzly is fairly new, so I think a couple more big matches can help season the character. And that could be exactly what Bob needs.

18. Amber Warren: 70/1
Momentum: 13th
Potential: 19th
Rankings: (19, 9, 10, 20, 17, 21, 18, 21)

Warren has had a lot of momentum, but where does that momentum come from? Nothing against JAM, who's been a very good RP'er, but his competition has been:

Izzy and Sandy (loss, though it was her debut, no shame to that)
The Carnival of Carnage (Blaze no showed)
Jimmy Flynn (win)
Sam Smith and Rush (Rush no showed)
The Scramble (Jimmy Flynn, Thrash, Hunter, Angel)

I'm sorry, but that doesn't impress me. If she wants to keep her momentum, she has to step up her game. Can she beat the likes of Hunter and Flynn? Of course she's proven that.

Anyone else bigger? Let's see how she does.

17. The Beard: 65/1
Momentum: 16th
Potential: 18th
Rankings: (21, 16, 18, 20, 19, 18, 17, 15)

The Beard gets the nod here by beating Grizzly Bob at WZ weekend. I just want to see what he does with a competition like this. Luckily, that RP for KC was definitely stellar. It could be very possible that Beard can pull it together and make a big run, if he churns out stuff like that.

Beard is a potential sleeping giant. Which is why he's so close to the sleeping giant category, but not quite there. Give me one round to see the direction he goes in, and he may just be a sleeping giant.

16. Alhazred: 60/1
Momentum: 17th
Potential: 10th
Rankings: (17, 14, 16, 12, 16, 16, 19, 16)

It was difficult to measure Alhazred's momentum. On the one hand, he did best Krypto in a big match. On the other, he did have a pretty subpar cycle before this, which to me was carried by Krypto. That doesn't mean Alhazred hasn't been awesome. On the contrary, he's been awesome before; note the potential being as high as it is. He, like Beard, could be a sleeping giant.

Which is why I need to see what Alhazred we'll be getting. Is it the genius Alhazred, or the Alhazred we saw for the KC cycle.

The choice is up to you, Alhazred.

Tomorrow, we'll tackle the sleeping giants.

 

[FlexAmerican Dynamite]

I think it would be interesting to give the odds of the actual individuals in the tournament now.

 

[Con T.]

I think it would be interesting to give the odds of the actual individuals in the tournament now.

Funny you should say that; that is exactly what I'm about to do. And I'm going to do it within the hour. All of the participants in the tournament, I will have done. I've decided to fuck off with the momentum and potential, and just give out panels rankings

 

[Con T.]

Right, so let's get down to bidness, shall we?

The Tournament Bracket

Right, now we have a full bracket of who is in. I've adjusted the rankings of the panelists to for who's actually here. Some I've already done, so to recap

15. Ricky Runn
14. Grizzly Bob
13. The Beard
12. Alhazred

So, what do we have to look for in the bracket? Let's fix some odds for half of the eleven remaining tonight, and the final five tomorrow.

11. Krypto: 40/1

Rankings: (11, 11, 8, 7, 9, 10, 8, 13)

What?! Alhazred is under Krypto?! Injustice!

Or, you know, just the way the poll is working out. Krypto had the world of WZCW in the palm of his green paw before hitting a certain snag (that we all don't need to get into again.) and if he can keep a sort of control to his RP's, he could very well again. Doc probably said it best; moderation can be a wonderful thing. And for for Krypto, moderation could very help him advance in this tournament. And if Krypto masters this, he could be fairly dangerous.

10. Mikey Stormrage: 37/1

Rankings: (6, 9, 4, 12, 11, 8, 12, 10)

Again, let's go to shootin' Shotaro to see what he says about his own partner:

16. Mikey Stormrage – A real coin flip for the last 16, could, maybe even should get this far without issues but with a relatively poor track record in singles matches he might not even make it. That being said if Yazloz gets rolling with the character he could be a surprising quarter or even semi finalist.

The problem is, Stormrage has been on an anti-roll since the Lethal Lottery. Can he gain back his steam? Course he could; guys on creative for a reason. But I wouldn't be shocked to see that Stormrage has major issues, especially when you consider that he has to fight Sam Smith in the first round.


9. Mat Tastic: 35/1

Rankings: (5, 11, 11, 8, 8, 11, 8, 8)

Mat has got a of momentum coming off of beating Alex Bowen. Would it shock anyone to see him go far in his tournament? Probably not.

Can we call him a favorite? No, only because he can throw a klunker once or twice in a cycle. In a tournament like this, can he afford to do that, when the competition is only going to get stronger each round? I'd like to see it, but it may be difficult.

And the bad thing, his run to the tournament may be the most difficult of them all. In the first round, he has Zeus. That in itself sounds like some not fun times (I wouldn't know, never met the guy...)

If he beats Zeus, he gets DC, who just got off singlehandedly winning War Games, or Krypto, who was on fire just a few rounds ago.

That's just to get to Redemption. If he gets past that, it could be Ricky, Strikeforce, or Sam freaking Smith.

... Hope Mat is ready for this...

8. Mason Westhoff 30/1

Rankings: (10, 8, 3, 13, 9, 9, 7, 6)

Unfortunately, being part of TSA, where they could have had 4 legitimate candidates for the finals, perhaps makes you forget Mason when he's good.

The problem is, it can also accentuate when he doesn't do that well. The word among the panel is that when he's good, he's great. When he's not so good, it's not so good. And the question becomes, like I said with Mat, can you keep that up for four rounds?

Don't be shocked if he does. Don't be shocked if he doesn't

7. Isabel Stone 25/1

The good thing for Isabel is, she has a bye. The bad thing about that is, she also has three matches against some of the best competition in the fed, still. The big question is, can Isabel beat the bigger names of the fed?

Let's not forget, save for a low blow at the Supershow, it's Blade with a bye potentially, and not Isabel Stone. In this tournament, there will be no second tries, no redo button. Of course, we also did see that she put up great work to beat Blade and Triple X the next week, so that isn't a problem. The problem becomes, can she consistently do that for three weeks, and churn out better work than her opponents?

6. Wasabi Toyota: 20/1

Rankings: (9, 8, 2, 9, 10, 3, 4, 3)

no one, and I mean no one, inspired as much division in his rankings as Wasabi Toyota. There are those that think he's a favorite, those that think he could lose in the first round. I can assume this comes from a lackluster KC cycle, in which he was never the focus of the Elite X feud. That probably makes him seem less of a threat.

It also makes him an absolute steal at these odds. When I thought of the sleeping giant bracket (pardon the expression here, given the circumstances), I had Wasabi in mind. He's such a threat, and his past success in the fed show that he can beat just about anyone in the fed. It would take very little to get Wasabi to the finals... And at these odds, I'm tempted to name him my official dark horse.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

I'm satisfied with those numbers, if not a little surprised at just how high I was. Except Shotaro, fuck that guy. All I did was write two title winning RPs for the guy as my partner.

 

[Thriller Ant]

Damn, someone put me as third? That must've been one hell of a blow job...

 

[Con T.]

The Final Five

Well, these are the five men that are the odds on favorites for this tournament. Any of these men can possibly win this tournament. And I could sit here and tell you the panelists had a hard time picking their winners.

Then again, I'm not a liar. Of the too five, two got 1st place votes, when all was said and done, there seemed to be a mass consensus on who people feel would win this tournament. But I think the panelists may not understand how difficult it will be for anyone to past through four matches, and consistently perform. So really, I think this could be anyone's tournament to win.

The Favorites

5. James Howard: (10/1)

Rankings: (3, 6, 6, 5, 5, 6, 8, 9)

This is the one that can really fuck shit up, to me. I really like to think that James Howard has been the strongest force of Strikeforce since his return. He also has a bracket to get through that includes his former partner, Mikey Stormrage. That said, James Howard may very be the most underrated person in the fed. Good enough to best just about anybody, and this may be the slingshot he needs to get into the main event scene.

4. DC: (8/1)

Rankings: (4, 5, 5, 9, 9, 4, 7, 3)

Much of this, one may argue, comes from DC's rise at War Games. I think he's been on a steady rise since his return, and may be on his way to the top in this tournament. DC now has the ability to fly on his own, and see where it gets him.

From the work he's doled out, that could be very far. He's many people's dark horse to win this, and I wouldn't be shocked at all.

3. Blade: (6/1)

Rankings: (7, 3, 6, 4, 2, 6, 4, 5)

Blade's run through the tournament is going to include a lot of demons that have proved bothersome. In fact, Blade's run to the tournament may be more difficult than Matt's; having Wasabi Toyota in the first match may prove to be too much. And if that isn't enough, he's going to face Isabel Stone.

Fortunately, Blade had proven he can best Isabel Stone. He's also proven he can lose to her. And the question becomes, can he conquer all of his demons, to win this tournament.

2. Dr. Zeus (5/1

Rankings: (2, 5, 2, 1, 3, 2, 1, 2)

Let's just get this out of the way; can Dr. Zeus keep this up for four rounds, against better competition than he's ever seen? He's beaten Blade, which may have been his biggest win so far. But give Blade another chance, and that can easily turn into a loss. Add to that having to beat competition he's never had to see, and this could be a shocking upset waiting to happen.

Dr. Zeus has proven impressive. But has he proven he can beat the big names?

1. Sam Smith: 2/1

Rankings: (1,1,1,2,1,1,2,1)

This was far and wide the consensus pick by the panelists. And why not? After all, this has everything you could want.

Big wins? Check.

Titles? Check

The truth is, Sam Smith is the target. This has been coming for a long time. Will this be the big moment that cements Sam Smith as a main event heel?

All signs point to this. But again; it's just a matter f the odds.