GSB's Post-Vasectomy After Care LD - What Rhymes With Sterile?

[George Steele's Barber]

What if you do have some baby makers floating around?

Depends, if it is a small amount then it means I have leftovers and I have to keep on flushing out the system. If it is a large amount it means that the surgery didn't take and I would probably have to do it again.

Would that mean this whole thing would be for nothing? Will you be pissed?

Part of me would be proud that I am so much of a man that I can defeat medical science but the other part of me would be pissed that I have to go through that discomfort again.

 

[IHW]

I guess it would suck. But since you are a man, you can handle it. Seems legit.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

I guess it would suck. But since you are a man, you can handle it. Seems legit.

Between child birth and some other stuff that I won't go in to, my wife puts me to shame in the world of "handling it".

Men have it easy.

 

[smizzy]

Between child birth and some other stuff that I won't go in to, my wife puts me to shame in the world of "handling it".

Men have it easy.

I envy the fact that women don't shit.. wait, they don't do they?

 

[George Steele's Barber]

I envy the fact that women don't shit.. wait, they don't do they?

Son, I need you to sit down for a minute so we can have a little talk about the birds and the bowel movements. Where do I start? Oh yes, my daughter. She is four years old and plugs up the toilet every couple of days. She takes dumps as big as your fist and five times as smelly. She's been taking dumps since she was born. Still in hospital, she took one that projectiled out of her ass so fast that it hit her bitch of a great aunt's arm. That's when I knew I would love that little girl more than life itself. Where was I? Oh yes, she will continue to take dumps. Her colon will get clouded with the garbage she eats and the fist sized feces will thin out a little but that won't stop her from taking dumps. She may meet a nice young man like yourself someday, but that won't stop her from taking dumps. She may hide it by shitting at home, work or back alleys but she will always shit. Then one day when you're knee deep in "I love you's" and miserable trips to IKEA you will walk in on her while you think she is talking a shower (for shower sex of course) and catch her in the act. Your heart will be broken by the sight and more by the scent but it will then be the point where you have to decide if this person is really worth it. I also recommend shower sex at that point to literally and figuratively wash away your new reality.

I hope you learned something from our talk son. Now get off my knee, this is really getting creepy.

 

[CH David]

This story is as beautiful as it is pungent. I nearly shed a tear.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

Depends, if it is a small amount then it means I have leftovers and I have to keep on flushing out the system. If it is a large amount it means that the surgery didn't take and I would probably have to do it again.



Part of me would be proud that I am so much of a man that I can defeat medical science but the other part of me would be pissed that I have to go through that discomfort again.

Fuck! Pig! Fuck! I just got a call from the Northwestern lab and my swimmers are hanging on. This means more time with rubbers and anxiety until the next test in 20 ejaculations. Fuck my mutantly powerful sperm.

Sketch comedy idea: Wolverine goes in for a vasectomy.

 

[CH David]

Oh man that would suck if you have to go back under the knife. I pray for your balls.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

Oh man that would suck if you have to go back under the knife. I pray for your balls.

Too often Christians forget that this was the crux of Jesus' message.

 

[Lowdown]

What up GSB. Just looking over the previous posts. Based on the healing process of the last procedure I trust you don't have to go through it a second time man. That's just cruel.

 

[SD619]

Fuck! Pig! Fuck! I just got a call from the Northwestern lab and my swimmers are hanging on. This means more time with rubbers and anxiety until the next test in 20 ejaculations. Fuck my mutantly powerful sperm.

That's rough. Hopefully you will get a favorable result.

Sketch comedy idea: Wolverine goes in for a vasectomy.

Even better: Wolverine performs a vasectomy.

 

[smizzy]

She may hide it by shitting at home, work or back alleys but she will always shit. Then one day when you're knee deep in "I love you's" and miserable trips to IKEA you will walk in on her while you think she is talking a shower (for shower sex of course) and catch her in the act. Your heart will be broken by the sight and more by the scent but it will then be the point where you have to decide if this person is really worth it. I also recommend shower sex at that point to literally and figuratively wash away your new reality.

I'm rendered speechless. To think I once saw marriage in my future.

 

[IHW]

Men have it easy.

That we do.

 

[shattered dreams]

If you have to go back, tell the doctor it is only fair if you get half off. On second thought ...

 

[Nate DaMac]

This thread is a gem. I love you GSB. I can only hope that I'm half the man that you are when I decide to no longer be a man like you have.

Day 2 feels a lot like Day 1. Constant discomfort but no major pain. I am excited that I get to take the gauze off once I get my lazy ass out of bed. No shower til tomorrow.

I took the vicoden to help me sleep last night and boy did it work. I felt so good that in the middle of the night I unconciously tried to have sex with my wife. She says I basically jumped her bones. I've been a sleep molester before but it's been a while and I never imagined that I would get unconciously aroused after surgery, while wearing a jock strap and having gauze wrapped around my nuts. Seven days without ejaculating is not going to be easy.

I have one friend that told me he does the same thing to his wife but most of the time he is drunk. Anyone else unconciously ever try to have sex with their bed partner (sexsomniac)? Have I reached TMI status yet?

I do it sometimes. Drives me fucking crazy because half the time, I don't really feel like doing anything and my wife won't let me go back to sleep.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

Bachelor party weekend. Drunk in Chicago. Headed to Michigan City, Indiana (Yazlov country).

Drunk, drunk, drunk. Vagina!

 

[FlexAmerican Dynamite]

Why would you want to leave a city as beautiful as Chicago while drunk to go Michigan?

 

[George Steele's Barber]

Why would you want to leave a city as beautiful as Chicago while drunk to go Michigan?

I fought this plan tooth and nail. I lost.

Drunker, drunkest, sitting on a bus with no bathroom. May end up pissin' in a jug. Sleep now if I'm lucky. Fuck you!

 

[FlexAmerican Dynamite]

Taking a bus from Chi town to Michigan is hell, pure and simple. Should of fought harder. Good luck.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

The force will be with me. Entering LSD.

Armpit!

 

[George Steele's Barber]

Just pissed in a jug. I feel much better.

Syphilis!

 

[shattered dreams]

GSB is a real gentleman. I would have used the floor.

 

[George Steele's Barber]

GSB is a real gentleman. I would have used the floor.

Tis true. I'm saving my vomit for the floor. One out the eleven is passed out. I thought I would be the first.

Not half way there yet.

Clitoris!

 

[shattered dreams]

One out the eleven is passed out.

Give him a vasectomy!

 

[George Steele's Barber]

I stole his phone and sent a message to his girlfriend from him.

Should be interesting to see how that goes.