shattered dreams
Hexagonal Hedonist
Have you made sure they still work?
GSB's Post-Vasectomy After Care LD - What Rhymes With Sterile?
- Thread starter George Steele's Barber
- Start date
George Steele's Barber
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I'd have brought ice cream if I were notified.
Ice cream on my nutsack would be really great.
You should write medical journals.
I've worked in a hospital for a little over five years. I should.
George Steele's Barber
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Finally a medical inquiry.
I can't ejaculate for a week (aka - I will not get a good night sleep for the next week). After that it is expected and encouraged that I let lose my demon semen often. However I have to keep a jimmy cap on it in case of any residual swimmers hanging on. After a month I get to drop a load in a container and bring it back to the Urology Department. If that load comes up sugar free I keep the white goo flowing regularly but should not risk knocking my wife up again.
After another 30 days I bring a second specimen to the semen specialists for another test and as long as that one comes up clean too I am free to fuck sheepskin free.
All I know after all of this is that I am probably going to have to buy new sheets. Any more questions?
George Steele's Barber
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This is likely the first and last time that I will ever be interested in someone else's sperm.
George Steele's Barber
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Sounds like my sperm is really hard for you to swallow.
No, your sperm goes down nice and easy. It's everyone else's sperm that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
At one point I was both. Those were the days.
I fill the supply carts amongst the departments. If you ever saw the supply closet in Scrubs, if you happened to watch it, that's essentially what I would restock.
George Steele's Barber
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I make sure to feast on the souls of virgin peacocks before I ejaculate. It gives my spooge a proper tanginess.
True story, my baby batter will be a secret ingredient on an upcoming episode of Iron Chef.
George Steele's Barber
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Day 2 feels a lot like Day 1. Constant discomfort but no major pain. I am excited that I get to take the gauze off once I get my lazy ass out of bed. No shower til tomorrow.
I took the vicoden to help me sleep last night and boy did it work. I felt so good that in the middle of the night I unconciously tried to have sex with my wife. She says I basically jumped her bones. I've been a sleep molester before but it's been a while and I never imagined that I would get unconciously aroused after surgery, while wearing a jock strap and having gauze wrapped around my nuts. Seven days without ejaculating is not going to be easy.
I have one friend that told me he does the same thing to his wife but most of the time he is drunk. Anyone else unconciously ever try to have sex with their bed partner (sexsomniac)? Have I reached TMI status yet?
I took the vicoden to help me sleep last night and boy did it work. I felt so good that in the middle of the night I unconciously tried to have sex with my wife. She says I basically jumped her bones. I've been a sleep molester before but it's been a while and I never imagined that I would get unconciously aroused after surgery, while wearing a jock strap and having gauze wrapped around my nuts. Seven days without ejaculating is not going to be easy.
I have one friend that told me he does the same thing to his wife but most of the time he is drunk. Anyone else unconciously ever try to have sex with their bed partner (sexsomniac)? Have I reached TMI status yet?
Lowdown
Ooh baby I like it roooaaaaw!
I can honestly and emphatically say no. Please continue.
George Steele's Barber
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It's been a while since I've done it but sometimes I either start rubbing my wife's breasts, vag or legs or I flat out just pull her next to me and start kissing her in the middle of the night while I am still asleep. The cool part is that sometimes she gets in to it and it leads to very quick and effective sex. The bad part is sometimes I am told to, "Get the fuck off of me, I am trying to sleep!"
Night sex can be fun, I recommend it with the right person (see individual, willing). I also recommend morning sex but know that you will probably lose this priviledge once you have kids.
George Steele's Barber
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Good question, we have shared with our four year old that we are done having any brothers or sisters for her. She says she wants to have kids of her own now so she can snuggle them.
They start so young.
Speaking of my 4 year old, I had the honor of watching A New Hope with her on the laptop last night. This meant a lot to me since I was able to keep my promise to the world that she would start on Episode IV instead of Episode I. I am not a traditionalist in any sense but this one. I just wanted her to have the same order experience as me. She spent most of the movie asking how they are going to save the princess and if we would could watch Episode V so that she could see Yoda.
Anyone here watch Episode I first?
So you'll be giving her the sex talk next week then, yeah? Might I suggest you go along the lines of this...
[YOUTUBE]tpCvnBrjAhQ[/YOUTUBE]
I'm of the generation where seeing Episode I first is fairly common, but I saw the original trilogy first. I don't think it was one of those things where my dad sat me down and watched the original trilogy with me. It was more that I had heard of Star Wars and was interested in seeing them. I have no recollection of what I thought of it. I don't even remember seeing the new trilogy at all. The only memory I have of watching Star Wars is during my sophomore year of college when I'd watch a movie before I went to bed every night, and I watched both trilogies in one week.
George Steele's Barber
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http://theboardofeducation.bandcamp.com/track/why-is-dad-so-mad
This link and song is for Davi323 (assuming he enjoys a good vasectomy thread every now and again). It helps explain the 30 and 40-somethings disdain for the destruction of everything we held dear during our childhood.
This link and song is for Davi323 (assuming he enjoys a good vasectomy thread every now and again). It helps explain the 30 and 40-somethings disdain for the destruction of everything we held dear during our childhood.
George Steele's Barber
Advertise Here $9.95/month
Day 2.5 update - discomfort is slowly dwindling. I took the gauze off and the best I can describe my nutsack is that it looks like the body of a baby robin that has just hatched from an egg. Bare and purplish in some places with some blood here and there.
I need to decide if I care enough to go out and watch SS on Sunday.
I need to decide if I care enough to go out and watch SS on Sunday.
Lowdown
Ooh baby I like it roooaaaaw!
You could always get the PPV and watch it at home. Have some of your crew come over and watch it with you.
George Steele's Barber
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Nah, I can't justify in my mind spending $60 for it. I am sure I could figure out how to steal it but I wouldn't feel right about that. Plus I like being in a room with a lot of fans and a full kitchen of bar food to order from. The bar charges $10 and the crowds reaction feels almost like being at the event.
On another note I finally got through Fellowship of the Ring Special Extended Edition. My favorite part is at the end when Gunner puts over the Orcs.
Lowdown
Ooh baby I like it roooaaaaw!
Probably not. He's the genetic jackhammer, remember?
George Steele's Barber
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Same time Steph got her tits done, family discount.
All those "second generation" superstars, eh?
Suppose Shane had springs surgically installed in his shins so he could do the coast-to-coast at the same time?
