Domestic football - spam version

[Dowdsy McDowds]

Has Alan Shearer's accent changed? He sounds a bit different tonight.

 

[Lee]

He has generic "I'm trying to make my accent neutral but it doesn't really work syndrome". Such people who suffer from this are Shearer, Steve Bruce and yours truly.

 

[Dowdsy McDowds]

He almost, and don't kill me for saying this, sounds a tad scouse with his pronunciations. Danny Murphy must have some kind of possessing powers, it's the only logical explanation.

 

[Loveless]

I have Dawson, Coleman, Jagielka and Lloris in my team so was hoping for a 0-0 today.

Happy Bunny

 

[Lee]

He almost, and don't kill me for saying this, sounds a tad scouse with his pronunciations. Danny Murphy must have some kind of possessing powers, it's the only logical explanation.

People say that to me quite often.

 

[Loveless]

Lloris is hard as nails. Lukaku knees him in the head and it's Lukaku who goes off injured.

 

[Captain Morgan Freeman]

I can't believe i only saw these pictures the other day.

Im guessing that's Kinnears hand in the top left photo.

 

[Uncle Sam]

What the fuck.

 

[Captain Morgan Freeman]

I better mention that's Newcastle owner Mike Ashley, just incase anyone thinks i randomly posted pictures of a topless fat man.

 

[Lee]

Was the sports direct head office party.

 

[Lee]

Work on a Saturday. Boo.

So how much are the scousers going to beat Fulham by?

 

[Lee]

Some bloody results.

 

[Loveless]

"Suarez as my captain, I'm gonna extend my lead at the top of the table"

* Looks at other teams *

"Fuck"

 

[Lee]

I've beat my points total for the last four weeks. I have 6 players to play today.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Well that's Suarez for you. More specifically, that's Suarez at home against a struggling Fulham for you.

 

[Lee]

Yeah that's why I opted him as captain this week. Put a lot of faith in the toon today. May be blind optimism.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Tottenham are looking clumsy, aren't they?

*Goal gets scored mid-post*

Yes, they are.

 

[Lee]

Yup!

 

[Барбоса]

Spurs are not just looking clumsy; they are looking extremely porous at the back.

Newcastle win the ball in midfield and one straight pass takes out the entire Spurs defence. Its happened up to 5 times already.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Lots of very nice shots though. Pity it's Dawson in my fantasy team.

 

[Lee]

I have Remy and Cabaye.

 

[Uncle Sam]

With how Jekyll/Hyde you've been this season, I've simply not got the balls to put any Newcastle players in my team.

 

[Uncle Sam]

Tim Krul, eh? Tim Krul.

 

[Blade]

Tim Krul indeed.

Mbiwa a little bit, too.

 

[Lee]

We're always scoring though, we can lose and still score.