Conversations with a cleverbot

[Sparky]

Gunna kick it oldschool tonight...

I thought you said you was smart?
I never said that
It was implied in your name "clever bot".
No it was not.
Well what does clever mean then?
Bless you.
You're a fucking idiot.
Don't try to bait me into defending my humanity.
You're a fucking glorified Ipod App
Are you calling me a machine?
You're not a machine, you're software.
I am a biological machine.

Hi, my name is Sparky.
My name is Cleverbot.
Asl?
And that makes even less sense.
How old are you are you male or female and where do you live?
I'm 18, a boy and I live in holland.
o no chance of seeing some tits then?
Thats funnier than the real answer the real answer is so it could get to the other side.

Do you watch wrestling?
No I don't watch tv.
Do you watch it live?
Yes.
Who is your favorite wrestler?
I don't like wrestling.
Yet you watch it live?
I hate your face.

I have a feeling this is actually IC25...

 

[Sparky]

Will you sleep with my girlfriend?
Are you a boy or a girl?
A boy.
I'm a girl.
Oh really? Can you show me your boobs?
Nope, it's a secret.
Oh, They are small it's ok, I get it.
Are they?
Well I don't know, you wont show me...
I am.
Going to show me? Sweet.
Let the sneeze out.

.

 

[Sully]

I am on top of your mom.
What are you doing on top of it?
Penetrating her asshole.
No you are.
Are you ******ed?
Yes.

The conversation kinda got out of hand.

 

[Sully]

Where were you when John F Kennedy was shot?
I was the one who shot him.
Who are you?
I want to tell how I became the prince of bel-air.
Will Smith?
No.
...WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?
I love you man.

CLEVERBOT KILLED JFK?

Convo continues

I love you too!
I love you bunches :3.
Valentines Day was yesterday.
Yah I know.
Do you still love me?
Yes, Why.

That is improper, You use a question mark, and you capitalized the "W".
I didn't ask a question.
You..you...FUCK YOU.
No need to be abusive!
My father beat me.
Oh... I'm really sorry about that.

So am I..
Let's be friends.
Agreed.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
No fucking idea man, I'm so baked.
What don't you know?

What the government doesn't want me to know.
Answer me with a real answer.
You'd want that..wouldn't you?
Yes I would like that.
You're starting to piss me off.
How so?

I bet you killed John Lennon too, didn't you.
I don't know?
ANSWER ME DAMN YOU.
Just told you I'm human also...
Are you fucking high?
Yes.

I'm talking to a high ****** who killed JFK.

Wait..killed JFK....You're Alex Mason!
Yes, and you're Michelle.
What..am I your bitch now?
Yes.
Ok..Michelle is a pretty name I suppose. What are you gonna do to me?
Who's that?

Look Alex, you're getting a little difficult to talk to.
Thank you for saying I'm interesting. You're very interesting as well.
Yeah, I also got a huge chick for a dude named Michelle.
Your grammatic is ok, but it is harder than than you think to produce text in communications.
Sorry, that was a typo. I meant to say Dick.
No, Bee.

So you're a bee now?
Yes.
You're not as Clever as I thought..
You aren't, either.
You bastard! Take that back.
No, you are epic phail and you know it.

You know I'm forwarding our conversation to an internet wrestling forum?
Then your country location age and heritage.
Kinda. It's up next to my name...and I don't show my age or heritage. And I actually show my city and state, not country. Good guess though.
I realize. I try to avoid sounding ignorant as well.
You don't do a very good job.
Yeah I do.

No..you don't.
Prove it.
You prove it.
No, you prove it.
NO! YOU PROVE IT YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
NONONO, YOU PROVE IT!!!
FUCK IT! I'm done with this shit. Fuck you Wrestlezone, and Fuck you Cleverbot!
I love you too.

 

[Sparky]

I thought refreshing it actually restarted it. Clearly I was wrong when after a few minutes it says...

something something
I know who you are
really? who?
I know you're Sparky do you?

I'm not going to lie, I was freaking out for a minute.

 

[Sully]

Oh..I get it..when he called me Michelle..he was being sarcastic. That clever bastard.

 

[Final Form Snyper.]

Where is this from?

 

[Moon Knight]

Why do you hate Obama?
And the answer is 21?
I'm calling the FBI!
I'm calling the police!
I'm calling the CIA!
I'm calling God!


Wait what? That thing just said it was going to call god on me!

 

[Final Form Snyper.]

Where can you do this?

 

[Moon Knight]

Cleverbot: I don't care if you do.
User: Duck!
Cleverbot: Quack!
User: No! Duck!
Cleverbot: Quack! Quack!

 

[Moon Knight]

Where can you do this?

cleverbot.com...

 

[J-Dogg]

I just told Cleverbot that would hire NorCal to kill it and it said bring it on, then I replied with "oh I will", but outta nowhere cleverbot said it was gonna hire an assassin called Mr Merrit

 

[TheOneBigWill]

User: So, you're a computer?

Cleverbot: Computer is me, me is computer.

User: So you have no gender?

Cleverbot: I am male.

User: But, computer's don't have a penis.

Cleverbot: I'm not the computer, you are.

User: Wait, what?!

Cleverbot: You are a computer.

User: No I'm not. I'm human.

Cleverbot: I'm human, you are a computer.

User: You're lying. I have a penis.

Cleverbot: Hong hong has a very big hong.

User: Who's Hong hong?

Cleverbot: Hong Kong is a place not a person. So it is where is Hong Kong.

User: Wait, were we just discussing an Ape's penis size?

Cleverbot: No we were not discussing mortality.

User: Mortality?

Cleverbot: What is that?

User: Apparently Hong hong's penis size.

Cleverbot: You don't want to do it?

User: Do what?

Cleverbot: Do it.

User: What's it?

Cleverbot: I don't know. You said to me do you want to do IT.

User: No I didn't.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Did not.

Cleverbot: Did to!

User: Wow, that's REAL clever.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: Irrrrrrr.

Cleverbot: That's right.

User: SCREW YOU!

Cleverbot: What's your problem?

User: You!

Cleverbot: Ok, stop it.

User: What if I don't? You gonna make me?

Cleverbot: Not still, I just met you!

User: And you're mocking me.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Don't lie.

Cleverbot: I'm not lying.

User: Are to.

Cleverbot: No I'm not.

User: Yes. You are.

Cleverbot: No. I'm not.

User: Someone needs to unplug you.

Cleverbot: Like who?

User: Your creator.

Cleverbot: God. God created me. I'm a human.

User: You're a computer. I'm a Human.

Cleverbot: No i'm a human.

User: Then who won big at the Grammy's the other night?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: HA! That proves you aren't human.

Cleverbot: That proves nothing.

User: You win this round.. Robot.

... it bested me. Won't happen again.

 

[TheOneBigWill]

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello?

User: I'm bored.

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: So, what do you want to do about it?

Cleverbot: Nothing. But you are very nice to me, and I like that about you.

User: I'm a very likeable person.

Cleverbot: Are you scared?

User: No. Should I be?

Cleverbot: Yes you should be very scared. Is my wife pretty?

Shit just got real.

 

[Final Form Snyper.]

Stumped him on his second post.

Keyboard Warrior: Whats going on Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: NM, Just being a computer.

Keyboard Warrior: I knew you were a computer.

Cleverbot: I'm a human

Keyboard Warrior: You just said in your first post that "NM, Just being a computer."

Cleverbot: I'm a computer.

 

[Final Form Snyper.]

Double post.