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Awesome parent conversations

Slyfox696

Excellence of Execution
I figured out tonight, that I've had SIX different junior high parents upset with me this basketball season. Damn good, eh? The season started in October, and it's just now December. I know how to piss people off in various ways. Just take a gander at some of these gems.

1.

Issue: 8th grade player mom mad at me because her son hadn't played in a game yet.

My stance: We had played 7 games. He was medically ineligible for two of them, and hadn't showed up to 2 of them. So, of the 7 games we'd played, he'd been able to get in THREE of them. And his mom's pissed because he didn't play. And these three games were right after I caught him LYING about missing practice so he could go to the town parade.

Final Resolution: After trying to explain it several times, I wind up hanging up on her. She calls the principal, and he hangs up on her. I only wish she had called the Superintendent. Why? Because that's my mom, and I would have LOVEd for her to complain about me to my mom. It'd been great fun.


2.

Issue: 8th grade player Dad mad because his son didn't play in one game.

My stance: This is his VERY first year of playing organized basketball, and he's our sixth man. He had played in every game to that point, and every game since. He had missed our practices over the weekend, because he had to go hunting. That's right, missed practice for hunting season.

Final Resolution: I don't give a fuck.


3.

Issue: 8th grade mom mad because we have practice on Saturday, and her son can't go hunting.

My stance: What the fuck is going on? Who gives a fuck about hunting? Ignoring for a fact that the deer hunting season lasts for weeks for kids his age, we HAVE to have practice on weekends because we have 5 different High School teams that have to practice as well. So, we have it on Saturday at 9:30. That gives them all day Saturday to hunt, and all day Sunday. Well, come to find out, she can't take him hunting on Sunday because of something SHE has to do. So, apparently, I'm supposed to organize my whole life, around her "busy" schedule. I say "busy" because I guarantee she hasn't been working 75+ hours for over a month.

Final Resolution: I'll be damned if I'm re-arranging my practices around her inability to take her son deer hunting on one of the 6 or 7 different weeks he can go.


4.

Issue: 7th grade Dad mad because his son didn't play in the second half of a game.

My stance: The game was on a Tuesday. We had had a game on Monday. The kid had spent the ENTIRE previous week in internal suspension after punching another kid (who is also on the basketball team) in the face. He then misses both weekend practices.

Final Resolution: I found the kid the next day at school, explained that I understood he was upset and why. Then I promptly reminded him how lucky he was that he was even on the team, and the fact I even let him play in the first half.

Score one of the Sly man.

5 & 6.

Issue: 7th grade parents mad because three 7th graders are playing in an 8th grade "B" game.

My stance: I only have 5 "B" team 8th graders. I only have two posts, and no ball handlers. Of the three kids I selected, two of them were ball handlers, and the other was a post. I only had three eighth grade jerseys, so I select the three that would complement the "B" team the best.

Final Resolution: After two ENORMOUS wins tonight, they make it a point to talk to me after the game. As if I'm not tired enough, I need to stick around longer. But, I say ok, and we discuss it, and basically tried to work with them to explain. They didn't like it, but I don't give a fuck.


So, how's that for a stellar two months? 2 months, 11 games, 6 upset parents.


I'm about done with them. The next one is probably going to get told to fuck off. I just hope I'm bigger than them.
 
My question to all of these: What was the players/kids perspective? What did they say when their parents weren't around?
 
My question to all of these: What was the players/kids perspective?
Most of the time, I don't know. The kids themselves, with the exception of one, have not come to talk to me.

The one exception was the one who wanted to go hunting. I explained to him the consequences of missing practice (it would have been losing a starting spot). But, he showed up the next day. I'll be honest, I was pretty proud of the kid. I'm sure his mom told him several times it'd be ok to skip, but playing basketball was important enough to be there.

I was impressed.
 
It always seems to me that the kids aren't the ones making these decisions. I know when I played football, there was nothing, and I mean nothing that would come before practice. The only thing would be an emergency, but as for regular days, I would be with my team.
 
You're exactly right. Which is what makes it REALLY hard, because you don't want to take it out on the kids, but at the same time, you don't know what the parents are saying to the kids at home. The parents try to undermine your authority at home, and then you have to hope the kids can choose for themselves to be more mature than their parents.
 
I've always thought this: parents shouldn't be allowed to be at games. It's stupid sounding, but the headaches would end for the players and the coaches, and, amazingly enough, they might have more fun!
 
I've always thought this: parents shouldn't be allowed to be at games. It's stupid sounding, but the headaches would end for the players and the coaches, and, amazingly enough, they might have more fun!

But the whole purpose of getting a child into sport is so that their parents can feel as if they're accomplishing something when their child does well. You can't live vicariously through your child if you can't see them.
 
I coach baseball., parent was mad at me for taking her son out of the game. I told her to sit her ass down on the bleachers before I have her escorted off the field, and out of the park.
 
But the whole purpose of getting a child into sport is so that their parents can feel as if they're accomplishing something when their child does well. You can't live vicariously through your child if you can't see them.

that is so unbelievably true. i umpire baseball over the summer, and usually its the parents with the worst kids that complain the most. face it: your kid sucks, the size of my strike zone will not change the fact that they dont have the strength to swing a bat. if i didnt get paid $30 a game it wouldnt be worth it
 
When I played football, I missed a practice for Rosh Hashanah. Coach informed that no one who misses practice can start. My mother was furious. Coach told her to go to the game, and if she was still upset, they could talk after. I missed one play the whole game, which was the first play.

My mom was still angry, and spoke with coach after the game. He basically told her to fuck off, her son was a captain, and he was used to make an example. He then reminded her how many workout I missed to go to debate tournaments in the off season, without any punishment, and seemed to calm down.

I didn't care, as my back up was the most uncoordinated person alive, and I knew that there was no way there was going to be a long period of time I wasn't going to be in the game.
 
As for not starting for religious holidays, not thinking that's cool. However, I see the point he was trying to make I suppose. Then, yet again, a parent gets involved when you were ok with it.
 
it comes down to rules are rules. if you miss practice, you dont start, period, end of story. seems to be a fairly universal thing all across america. it doesnt fucking matter WHAT it was for. You have a commitment to your guys on the team who sweat, bleed and cry alongside you. If your not there for them, then the guy who IS will be in the game for you.
 
I figured out tonight, that I've had SIX different junior high parents upset with me this basketball season. Damn good, eh? The season started in October, and it's just now December. I know how to piss people off in various ways. Just take a gander at some of these gems.

1.

Issue: 8th grade player mom mad at me because her son hadn't played in a game yet.

My stance: We had played 7 games. He was medically ineligible for two of them, and hadn't showed up to 2 of them. So, of the 7 games we'd played, he'd been able to get in THREE of them. And his mom's pissed because he didn't play. And these three games were right after I caught him LYING about missing practice so he could go to the town parade.

Final Resolution: After trying to explain it several times, I wind up hanging up on her. She calls the principal, and he hangs up on her. I only wish she had called the Superintendent. Why? Because that's my mom, and I would have LOVEd for her to complain about me to my mom. It'd been great fun.


2.

Issue: 8th grade player Dad mad because his son didn't play in one game.

My stance: This is his VERY first year of playing organized basketball, and he's our sixth man. He had played in every game to that point, and every game since. He had missed our practices over the weekend, because he had to go hunting. That's right, missed practice for hunting season.

Final Resolution: I don't give a fuck.


3.

Issue: 8th grade mom mad because we have practice on Saturday, and her son can't go hunting.

My stance: What the fuck is going on? Who gives a fuck about hunting? Ignoring for a fact that the deer hunting season lasts for weeks for kids his age, we HAVE to have practice on weekends because we have 5 different High School teams that have to practice as well. So, we have it on Saturday at 9:30. That gives them all day Saturday to hunt, and all day Sunday. Well, come to find out, she can't take him hunting on Sunday because of something SHE has to do. So, apparently, I'm supposed to organize my whole life, around her "busy" schedule. I say "busy" because I guarantee she hasn't been working 75+ hours for over a month.

Final Resolution: I'll be damned if I'm re-arranging my practices around her inability to take her son deer hunting on one of the 6 or 7 different weeks he can go.


4.

Issue: 7th grade Dad mad because his son didn't play in the second half of a game.

My stance: The game was on a Tuesday. We had had a game on Monday. The kid had spent the ENTIRE previous week in internal suspension after punching another kid (who is also on the basketball team) in the face. He then misses both weekend practices.

Final Resolution: I found the kid the next day at school, explained that I understood he was upset and why. Then I promptly reminded him how lucky he was that he was even on the team, and the fact I even let him play in the first half.

Score one of the Sly man.

5 & 6.

Issue: 7th grade parents mad because three 7th graders are playing in an 8th grade "B" game.

My stance: I only have 5 "B" team 8th graders. I only have two posts, and no ball handlers. Of the three kids I selected, two of them were ball handlers, and the other was a post. I only had three eighth grade jerseys, so I select the three that would complement the "B" team the best.

Final Resolution: After two ENORMOUS wins tonight, they make it a point to talk to me after the game. As if I'm not tired enough, I need to stick around longer. But, I say ok, and we discuss it, and basically tried to work with them to explain. They didn't like it, but I don't give a fuck.


So, how's that for a stellar two months? 2 months, 11 games, 6 upset parents.


I'm about done with them. The next one is probably going to get told to fuck off. I just hope I'm bigger than them.

This would make for a great show on HBO. In fact, it would be outright hilarious if it weren't all true. You'd be like House if we coached basketball.

Most of the time, I don't know. The kids themselves, with the exception of one, have not come to talk to me.
That's because most of the time, the kids either
A) don't actually care, and it's these insane parents, or
B)are bitching to their parents so THEY'LL complain for them.

Kids are *****es. Next time, when a parent says their son is upset, tell em he needs to grow a pair and talk to you personally. I know the basketball coach at my old high school used to do stuff like that. And they won the division title. Course, he got fired for "emasculating the kids". But I'll tell you, those *****es never won a title since then, and still haven't since I left.

The one exception was the one who wanted to go hunting. I explained to him the consequences of missing practice (it would have been losing a starting spot). But, he showed up the next day. I'll be honest, I was pretty proud of the kid. I'm sure his mom told him several times it'd be ok to skip, but playing basketball was important enough to be there.

I was impressed.
And I bet you let him play in the game. Despite that mom being a PITA, I doubt you'd take it out on the kid, Besides, positive reinforcement is major tool when you're teaching kids.
 
As for not starting for religious holidays, not thinking that's cool. However, I see the point he was trying to make I suppose. Then, yet again, a parent gets involved when you were ok with it.

rules are rules dude. just as you cant discriminate against them for their religion, you also cant cater to them becuase of religion. one standard across the board.
 
You'll be feared. And fear is power. At least that's what I've heard. I'm not feared so I'll never know.
 
Yeah but I can't be mean. It's not in my coding.

I mean......uh.......my personality. Yeah, that's what I meant.
 

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