WrestleZone Forum Files #8: John Cena at Wrestlemania XXXIV (Get on the Main Page!)

[klunderbunker]

Post in here until Monday, January 1 for a chance to make the main page.

Today’s Topic: What is John Cena doing at Wrestlemania XXXIV?

Earlier this week, rumors started to leak out that John Cena’s Wrestlemania match will be announced on the 25th anniversary special of Monday Night Raw. Rumored names for his opponent include Goldberg, Undertaker, Batista and even Hulk Hogan. Any of those would be major draws, but what do you think Cena will be doing?

Wrestlemania is the biggest show of the year and, love him or hate him, Cena is still one of the biggest stars in the wrestling world. His match will almost be guaranteed to be a featured attraction and that could go a bunch of different ways. Let us know what you think he’ll be doing and whether you can see it on the main page!

 

[enviousdominous]

I think that the most likely candidate is Batista, though I think that Batista wouldn't get as much of a shock pop as any of the other candidates.

Batista has earned a reputation as a Hollywood actor, which is a tired old trope for a heel so I imagine he would come back merely to "settle the score" or some shit. He'd likely be the easiest person to call back, in that I imagine he'd be more willing, more able, and less likely to start a firestorm of controversy due to sins of his past.

Goldberg would be great, in that -- to my knowledge -- Goldberg and Cena have never worked together in any capacity. I don't know Goldberg from Adam, but from what I've seen he's only willing to put on a show if he gets a Hell of a lot of penance from the WWE (i.e. squashing Brock). I don't see him agreeing to work a random "surprise" match with Cena that would benefit both of their images.

Undertaker appears to be on his last legs. I'm honestly holding out for a potential Sting vs Undertaker match, but there are other reasons why I doubt this will happen beyond petty hopes. The Undertaker is no longer a WrestleMania spectacle to me. He gave an epic win to Brock, and then he mostly let Roman paint by numbers and score a pin. At this point, a pro-wrestler beating The Undertaker at WrestleMania is like an MMA fighter beating Fedor Emelianenko. The Undertaker can still sell tickets, but there's nothing at stake except being able to say that you're as good as *cough* Roman Reigns.

Hulk Hogan....... yeah. For the sake of the human race, I'm going to try very hard to be nice here. Hogan is neat in that he can conjure memories of when he had high profile feuds with Andre, Nikolai, Sheik, Sting, Piper and so on. He was an icon, and now John Cena is an icon. Who's the bigger icon? I don't know, and I won't know by watching a 64 year old man slugging through a match with John Cena. I'm obviously a very proud hypocrite in that I've already extolled the virtues of seeing Undertaker and Sting have a WrestleMania match, but at least their match wouldn't be one where someone's entire career could be destroyed by giving up a loss. I was a huge Bret Hart fan, who cringed seeing him beat The Miz for the US title. They would make it fun and entertaining for those that still react in any way to the "YOU!" fingerpoint, but for fans born after 1985 it would just look like John Cena wrestling a crash test dummy.

In saying all that; even though I hate John Cena will all the fiber of my soul, I would buy a ticket to watch him take on any of those opponents. Mainly because it's WrestleMania, but also because I'll pay to watch anyone beat him up.