klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Adam Rose has been released.
Monday Night Raw
Date: May 23, 2016
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
We're past Extreme Rules and now on to Money in the Bank season, meaning we might start tonight with some qualifying matches. However, the bigger story coming out of last night is the return of Seth Rollins, who attacked WWE World Champion Roman Reigns after Reigns retained over AJ Styles. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the main event and Rollins making his return.
Opening sequence.
Here's Seth to get things going, complete with a new graphic that says Redesign, Rebuild, Reclaim. He certainly looks like a face to start though I wouldn't put money on that one. Rollins gets a nice WELCOME BACK chant before smiling at the crowd and saying it's been 200 days since he's been in this ring. In case you've been living under a rock (or in case you're really not paying attention), he's back. He's here to get back the title that he never lost and last night he fired the first shot with the Pedigree on Reigns.
The fans keep freaking out so Rollins asks if they missed him. Fans: YES! YES! YES! Rollins brings up some of the dastardly things he's done over the years and about how the fans didn't buy him by calling him a coward who hid behind the Authority. Then his knee went out from all the weight of carrying this company. Over the last few months he's gotten so many fan letters but he put every one of them in a garbage can and set them on fire.
None of these fans were here with him when he was rehabbing his knee twice a day. Now he's back on his own to get the title back but here's Reigns to interrupt. Rollins of course bails and says it's happening on his time. This brings out Shane to invite Rollins back inside for an adult conversation. This conversation consists of Shane making Roman vs. Seth for the title at Money in the Bank.
Sheamus talks about how much he can't stand Sami Zayn and this New Era. Tonight he's going to give Sami a beating for all the people who are sick of this foreigner coming in with his stupid hat. Nothing wrong with a simple, old school pre-match promo.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Sami Zayn
Sheamus takes him down into a wristlock to start, followed by a legdrop of all things. Sami sends it outside with a hurricanrana, only to have Sheamus put a knee in his ribs to send us to a break. Back with Sheamus getting two off the Irish Curse but Sami BLASTS him with a clothesline and gets two off the Michinoku Driver. The Brogue Kick misses and Sami clotheslines him to the floor, only to have the flip dive blocked by a forearm. Sheamus gets back in and eats a quick Helluva Kick for the pin at 10:00.
Post match Sheamus is furious.
After a break, Apollo Crews is talking about how this is the biggest match of his life when Sheamus jumps him from behind and lays him out.
Here's New Day for a six man tag and they've got a birthday cake. Tonight is the 1,200th episode of Monday Night Raw and that means it's time to celebrate. However, since cakes in wrestling rings always end up in someone's face, Big E. picks up the cake and takes it outside to get things out of the way. As he threatens Byron Saxton, cue the Social Outcasts to jump New Day from behind and take us to a break.
New Day vs. Social Outcasts
Joined in progress with Kofi hurricanranaing Slater out of the corner and stomping him down in the corner. Slater is sent to the floor for a Bo Train but Heath collapses, leaving the other two to take a flip dive from Woods. The Midnight Hour puts Slater away at 2:00.
Slater takes the cake post match.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. The Miz
Non-title. Before the match, Miz and Maryse celebrate their win and promise to win the briefcase again, setting up Miz's biopic. Cesaro starts fast with the uppercuts in the corner for two before diving over the top to take Miz out again. He even tells Maryse to talk to the hand, taking us back to about 1997.
Back in and Cesaro gets two more off a delayed suplex to send Miz outside as we take a break. We come back with Miz hitting the Reality Check but charging into the uppercut. The Swing doesn't work because of the shoulder but Miz can't hit the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead it's another uppercut and the Neutralizer for the pin on Miz (of course) at 11:24.
We recap the opening segment.
Rollins talks about how Money in the Bank is his thing when Stephanie comes in. Rollins is all nice to her but she says things have changed around here.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Chris Jericho vs. Apollo Crews
Crews seems just fine after the beatdown earlier tonight while Jericho's back is covered in bandages from the thumbtacks. Jericho throws a t-shirt in Crews' face to start and hammers away, only to have Crews just hit him in the bandages because Crews has an IQ above butter. Jericho's dropkick and chinlock don't do much as Apollo elbows him in the jaw and avoids the dropkick out of the corner to send Jericho outside.
There's a moonsault from the apron (mostly missed) to drop Jericho again but Jericho counters the toss powerbomb into the Walls. A rope is grabbed and Crews tries to nip up, only to have Jericho Lionsault onto him for two. Another Walls attempt is countered into a small package, only to have the Codebreaker puts Apollo away at 7:46.
Sheamus laughs at the result.
Life Lesson with Bob Backlund from Smackdown.
Baron Corbin beat Dolph Ziggler last night because he can. This brings in Ziggler, to say Corbin can't beat him in a straight match. Corbin agrees but doesn't want to see Ziggler again after. Ziggler promises to steal the show tonight.
Here's Big Cass, who points to the entrance for the returning Enzo Amore. Enzo is VERY fired up to be back and talks about how he's back because if he had a dime for every time he got knocked down and didn't get back up, he would have ZERO DIMES. Cass is ready to kick Bubba Ray Dudley in the head and send him into a pool like a basketball.
Big Cass vs. Bubba Ray Dudley
Feeling out process to start until D-Von goes after Enzo, allowing Bubba to get in a belly to back suplex. He spends too much time shouting though, allowing Cass to take over with a clothesline. A Stinger Splash has Bubba in trouble and we keep up the Sting treatment with Cass slamming him off the top. Cass' big boot and the empire Elbow put Bubba away at 3:11.
Here are Charlotte, Ric Flair and Dana Brooke to talk about their win last night. Ric....oh my goodness he is BOMBED. Anyway, Ric talks about how Charlotte has earned her way to the top and been amazing at everything she's done. As for Dana, she doesn't exist without Charlotte, which Dana seems to agree with. Charlotte talks about how her dad was never there for her on Christmas and birthdays because Flair was off being the man. Now Charlotte gets it though because now she's the woman.
That power makes her be able to say it to him: get out of her ring. Charlotte goes on a rant about how she doesn't need her dad anymore and how she's going to be better than the sixteen time World Champion has ever been. She's tired of having everyone look at her and ask how Ric is doing so now he is dead to her. Charlotte doesn't want to talk and tells Ric to get out because he can watch her on TV like she did with him for thirty years. Ric leaves in tears while Charlotte and Dana pose. Charlotte still needs practice talking but this worked exactly as it was supposed to.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler headlocks him to the mat to start but Dean slams him with ease and throws Dolph out to the floor. The dive doesn't get to launch as Ziggler steps to the side as we take a break. Back with Ziggler getting butterfly superplexed for two but missing a dive. Dean's top rope elbow is countered into a rollup for two, followed by the Fameasser for the same.
Both guys try cross bodies at the same time and we get a quick breather. Dean gets superkicked to little effect as he bounces off the ropes with the rebound lariat for two. Ambrose goes for the elbow again but gets dropkicked out of the air this time. The Zig Zag is countered though and Dirty Deeds sends Dean to the ladder match at 12:09.
Ric is leaving and even Arn Anderson can't make him feel better. Renee Young asks if he has anything to say but Ric gives a very sad forced smile and leaves. That was one of the best scenes I've seen in wrestling in a long time. Ric genuinely looked devastated and had nothing to say. It was quiet, it was emotional and it felt real.
The Shining Stars want us to visit Puerto Rico.
Here's AJ Styles with something to say before his match. AJ talks about how he would have been WWE Champion if not for Anderson and Gallows. This brings the big balds to the ring, where they question what he just said. AJ didn't bring these guys to the WWE to take out everyone in his way but the way they see it, if this was in Japan, Styles would have been buying them a round of drinks after what happened last night.
AJ thinks it's time for them to go their separate ways but Anderson and Gallows suggest that AJ never would have made it out of Japan (or a bunch of bar fights for that matter) without them. Styles says they're still brothers and friends but not on the same team. Gallows says no way because they're not even friends anymore. That seems to be fine with AJ as the two of them leave.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens
They slug it out to start until Owens grabs a headlock (HEADLOCK MASTER!), only to eat a good dropkick for two. Owens gets in a dropkick of his own but AJ bails to the apron. AJ is pulled face first into the apron with Owens heading back inside but rolling under the ropes instead of diving over the top like he was teasing. As usual he's the best troll in wrestling.
Back from a break with AJ fighting out of a sleeper and hammering away on the floor. They slug it out inside with AJ getting the better of it, only to be pulled off the ropes and sent into the corner with a German suplex. The Cannonball is followed by Owens telling Cole to shut up but AJ gets in a jumping enziguri. That's fine with Owens who comes back with his brainbuster onto the knee for two but misses the moonsault.
AJ sends him outside and knees him in the jaw, only to eat the Pop Up Powerbomb onto the steps. Somehow AJ beats the count back in (that's a bit much) and gets in a quick Pele. He really shouldn't be up that fast after a finisher onto the steps but finishers haven't meant anything in WWE in forever. The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up though and the Pop Up Powerbomb gives Owens the pin at 16:20.
Results
Sami Zayn b. Sheamus Helluva Kick
New Day b. Social Outcasts Midnight Hour to Slater
Cesaro b. The Miz Neutralizer
Chris Jericho b. Apollo Crews Codebreaker
Big Cass b. Bubba Ray Dudley Empire Elbow
Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler Dirty Deeds
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles Pop Up Powerbomb
Tuesday
Eden Stiles has been granted her release from WWE.
Impact Wrestling
Date: May 24, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
It's a big show tonight with May Mayhem, meaning things are a bit more violent than the regular shows. As you might guess, this is a show that was announced a week ago with almost no other build. The big match tonight is Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III as Carter tries to get his rematch with Mike Bennett. Let's get to it.
The opening video focuses on everything we're getting to see tonight.
Here's Matt Hardy for a chat before his match with Ethan. Matt now has half black and half white hair (divided down the middle) which looks like Bozo the Clown's. Before the match Matt talks about how he has evolved into something more dangerous. He sees this match as nothing more than a warmup for his match with Jeff at Slammiversary.
With something like a weak British accent, Matt says he has a contract for the match with his brother Nero, which brings out Rockstar Spud and Tyrus. Spud says he's dedicated his life to Matt Hardy. Matt: As you should. That accent is REALLY weird and comes off like Matt trying to be all intelligent and brilliant and it's really just creepy.
Spud blames the fans for this going too far but Tyrus really doesn't care. Matt says it's ok to say he looks like a psychotic lunatic. He has a deal for Nero tonight: if Nero can beat Spud and Tyrus in a ladder match, there will be a match between the brothers at Slammiversary. If Jeff loses though, there's no match. Also if Jeff wins, Spud and Tyrus are done associating with Matt. This felt like someone shouting LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME and trying to be all interesting but coming off as a guy who is more sad than anything else. As usual, Matt is in over his head and is nowhere near as brilliant as he thinks he is.
Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Hardy
Matt pounds away in the corner as we hear about how amazing a transformation he's undergone to become this lunatic. Carter charges into a boot to the face and gets elbowed in the jaw to keep him down. A bulldog out of the corner gets two for Matt and he whips Carter into the corner.
The slow pace continues with a legdrop until Carter comes back with a jawbreaker, only to miss a splash in the corner. Here's Mike Bennett to watch as Matt gets two off a Side Effect. The Twist of Fate is countered into a cobra clutch but Bennett comes in for the DQ at 6:40. The stipulation said that Carter had to win by pin/submission to get his shot so Ethan gets nothing.
Mike lays Carter out post match and says that he has failed. There will be no rematch at Slammiversary.
Post break Bennett says what he just did was art and you don't have to explain art. A few weeks ago he had a vision for EC3's Road to Redemption. Well now Ethan has failed because he didn't get the job done, meaning no match at Slammiversary. This was just repeating what was said earlier.
Here's Allie to introduce Maria for a speech. Maria talks about how she's taking over the new future for the Knockouts and Velvet Sky is part of the past. This brings out Gail Kim, who says Maria manipulated her way to the top of the division. They argue over Velvet being fired with Maria saying she put on her boots just like Gail told her to and she attained power. Gail offers to beat her up right now but Maria threatens to have her fired. This results in Gail being put in a match with her career on the line, which brings in Sienna for a cheap shot from behind. Who is actually begging to see Gail vs. Maria in a straight match?
Grado promises Mahabali Shera that he'll take care of Al Snow tonight. Grado has a chain wrapped around his fist while Shera eats what looks like a drumstick.
The BroMans call each other from about a foot away. Robbie thinks they need to move up a few levels while Jesse keeps stopping to talk to people. Apparently Robbie has found them a guru to take it to another level. A woman comes up to point out that they're right next to each other and Robbie blames Jesse for not paying attention.
Gail rants about how angry she is.
We recap Al Snow vs. Grado in your standard I'm old and grizzled and you're not serious enough feud. Snow claims to be a pure athlete and keeps cheating to win matches.
Al Snow vs. Grado
Street fight. Before the match, Snow asks if the fans want violence, chairs and tables. Well even if they do, they're not going to get it because he's a wrestler. Snow: I'm your mom's favorite wrestler! Naturally he hides behind the set and jumps Grado from behind to start things off. The bell hasn't rung yet as Snow slams Grado's hand into the steps. They head inside for the bell with Snow slamming him down but missing the moonsault.
Snow's powder is thrown back into his face as Shera brings in a trashcan full of weapons. Grado spanks him with a cookie sheet and it's time for the drumstick (as in a bone with meat on it) for a low blow. A chain punch hits Grado in the jaw but here are two newcomers (NXT's Marcus Louis and Sylvester LeFort) to pull the referee out. The distraction lets Snow hit the Snow Plow for the pin at 3:39.
Matt Hardy (of course) is sitting in the dark when Reby comes in to ask what's wrong. We get another monologue about how Matt needs to get rid of Nero for his life to continue. Reby talks about how he's alienating everyone but Matt doesn't care because it's all about Nero.
Jeremy Borash is in the ring to talk about the end of last week's show when Lashley interrupts. Lashley rants about how many fights he's had without twenty idiots interrupting but here's Drew Galloway to cut him off. Drew says Lashley can lay claim to being the only real fighter on the roster but he'll stick to the title of World Heavyweight Champion. Last week he saw fear in Lashley's eyes but Lashley doesn't want to hear it.
Drew comes to the ring for a fight but Dixie Carter comes out to say this is ridiculous. Yeah we need to cut out this action on a wrestling show. I for one would love another Matt Hardy monologue right about now. Dixie makes the rematch for Slammiversary with only submissions or knockouts for the win. If I'm Drew, I'd be rather ticked off by that but of course he's fine with everything.
Lashley calls him out and the fight is on again with Drew hitting a Claymore and pounding away. Security's intervention only slows Drew down, allowing Lashley to get in a spear and hammer away. A referee gets speared and Lashley chokes Drew out with a belt. Lashley isn't done yet and takes off his shirt but does nothing.
X-Division Title: Andrew Everett vs. Eddie Edwards vs. DJZ vs. Trevor Lee
Lee is defending and this is Ultimate X with the belt hung at the intersection of two cables. The first person to climb up and pull it down is champion. We come back from a break after Eddie's entrance with the rest of the entrances because we haven't wasted enough time on this show yet. Shane helms is out with Lee and Everett, who are introduced as a team. Eddie dives over the top to take out Everett before the bell rings.
It's a huge brawl to start of course until Everett dropkicks everyone down and goes for the belt, only to have Lee pull him down and swear a bit. Helms tells his boys to calm down and Everett lets Lee get on his shoulders to help him get tot he belt. Eddie and DJZ come in for the save (why this isn't a tag match and non-title is beyond me) with DJZ elbowing both heels in the jaw.
Edwards hurricanranas both of them down at the same time but Lee knees him in the face. DJZ pops up and rolls forward into a DDT on Trevor to knock the champ silly. Eddie goes up and pulls down the title, only to have Shane distract the referee so Trevor can steal the belt to retain at 5:59.
Maria has chosen Sienna to take out Gail Kim by ripping out her heart.
Ethan talks about playing rigged games all his life. There is no honor in what Bennett did but the rematch is going to happen no matter what. Ethan is about to make a phone call he's going to regret. Bennett was comparing himself to artists but those people had a life's work. After Ethan is done, Mike isn't even going to have a life. As usual, really good stuff here from Ethan as he kept it simple and responded to everything Mike said while advancing the story.
Sienna vs. Gail Kim
Allie and Maria are at ringside and Gail's career is on the line. Sienna jumps Gail from behind but gets knocked away, allowing Gail to hit a quick high cross body for two. A hurricanrana takes both of them outside but Maria helps Sienna up, allowing her to send Gail into the barricade. Back in and a Samoan drop gets two for Sienna but Gail comes back with a reverse DDT. Maria shoves Gail off the ropes, only to have her reverse the spinning faceplant into a sunset flip to pin Sienna at 4:13.
Sienna drops Gail post match and Maria pounds away.
Rockstar Spud begs Tyrus to win tonight for Matt's sake. Reby comes in and says do it for her sake because Matt is insane over this Jeff stuff. Spud says having Matt back to normal is worth anything.
The BroMans go to meet their guru and it's....actually a woman, who has purple hair and is in great shape. Her name is Raquel (Gabi from last year's Tough Enough) and apparently she's the guru they've been looking for. After a hard workout, she says she'll see them in the pool.
Lashley and Drew Galloway will pick each other's opponents next week.
Rockstar Spud/Tyrus vs. Jeff Hardy
Ladder match. If Jeff wins, he faces Matt at Slammiversary in a Full Metal Mayhem match and Spud/Tyrus are done associating with Matt. If Jeff loses, there's no match and Matt is happy anyway. Jeff hands out what looks like CDs during his entrance, which is actually not a horrible idea. Spud jumps Jeff before the bell (because we haven't seen that tonight) but Tyrus posts himself and gets a chair thrown at his back. Jeff throws in a ladder and we go to a break without the match actually starting.
The match is joined in progress with Tyrus pulling a ladder to send Jeff throat first into the ropes. A legdrop between Jeff's legs should allow Tyrus to just sit on him so Spud can climb but instead Tyrus picks him up. Spud drops a top rope elbow and goes to get a ladder as Tyrus lifts Jeff up again.
Tyrus splashes Spud by mistake but Jeff can't follow up. Spud is sent out to the floor and Tyrus tries to climb, only to be too heavy and break the rungs. Jeff laughs at him as Spud comes back in, only to have Tyrus get knocked outside. Spud goes up but gets caught in a Twist of Fate onto the top of the ladder, allowing Jeff to pull down the contract at 5:10.
Matt comes out to stare at Jeff to end the show.
Results
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered
Al Snow b. Grado Snow Plow
Trevor Lee b. Eddie Edwards, Andrew Everett and DJZ Lee pulled down the title
Gail Kim b. Sienna Sunset flip
Jeff Hardy b. Tyrus/Rockstar Spud Jeff pulled down the contract
Wednesday
WWE has announced a new Brand Split with Smackdown moving to Tuesdays where it will air live. There will be a Draft held at some point before July 19.
NXT
Date: May 25, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
We're two weeks out from Takeover and after last week, most of the card is set. The big story is the announcement of the first ever steel cage match around these parts as NXT Champion Samoa Joe is defending against former champion Finn Balor. Other than that it looks like we'll be getting Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Austin Aries as well. Let's get to it.
William Regal tells us that Bayley is injured and unable to face Asuka for the Women's Title. Therefore tonight there will be a triple threat for the #1 contendership between Nia Jax, Alexa Bliss and Carmella.
Opening sequence.
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa vs. TM61
TM61 is the recently signed The Mighty Don't Kneel, comprised of Shane Thorn and Nick Miller. In a quick pre-match inset promo, TM61 says they're here for the titles because they're mighty and don't kneel. Miller and Ciampa hit the mat to start before it's off to Thorn, who gyrates and sticks his chest out as he walks around. Gargano gets pulled down in the corner for a double wishbone as things settle down a bit. Johnny crawls through Nick's legs for the hot tag, only to have Ciampa eat a double elbow to the jaw. TM61 actually stands tall as we go to a break.
Back with Miller holding Ciampa in a headlock until an elbow to the jaw allows Gargano to get the tag and spear Miller through the ropes. Thorn comes in but gets caught in something like an Anaconda Vice with Gargano using his legs as a crucifix. Ciampa is back in and elbows Thorn again, only to eat a dropkick for the tag off to Miller. Nick comes in and starts cleaning house, capped off by a delayed backdrop into a neckbreaker from Thorn. Gargano dives onto Miller, leaving Thorn to take the knee to the head/superkick combo for the pin at 13:13.
Gargano and Ciampa applaud TM61.
Video on Samoa Joe winning the title and his new found aggression.
Bayley is upset that she can't compete when Nia Jax comes in to say that she's broken Bayley, who will never be the same again. Carmella runs in to defend her friend but Nia laughs it off. Alexa Bliss comes in and gets the same treatment.
Andrade Cien Almas takes off his mask while watching old lucha libre.
Here's Austin Aries with something to say. Aries is tired of hearing people talk about how someone is the best. You're only the best until someone better comes along, so he's always called himself great. But how do you define greatness? Maybe by proving your talent over ten years? Or by having great matches everywhere you go? Or by being a champion in every promotion you've ever been? See, he's done all those things but he's tired of being overlooked. The fans chant for Nakamura but Aries wants a shot at the winner of the cage match. There go the lights and here comes Nakamura.
Shinsuke starts in Japanese then corrects himself because Aries doesn't understand. Nakamura: You don't speak Japanese? Aries: I don't understand you. Nakamura: Yeah me either. Shinsuke says the title isn't coming to greatness because it's coming to the King of Strong Style. Cue Regal, which draws a TAKEOVER chant. The match is made though nothing is mentioned about being #1 contender.
American Alpha is ready for the Revival because there's more to wrestling than punching people in the face. It doesn't matter if it's in Dallas or at Full Sail, they'll be ready, willing and Gable.
No Way Jose vs. Jonathan Ortagun
Jose dances out of a waistlock to start and it's already time for an airplane spin, which goes both ways for a little extra fun. A clothesline in the corner just annoys Jose and things get serious, including an atomic drop and the baseball punch. The corba clutch slam gives Jose the pin at 3:21.
Jose dances with the announcers post match.
Video on Finn Balor, who wants the title back.
Asuka doesn't care who she faces at Takeover because she will defeat them.
Carmella vs. Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss
For the #1 contendership at Takeover. Bayley hugs Carmella before her entrance. Nia has a new entrance where the camera cuts to an extreme closeup of her eyes before she starts walking. Bliss bails to the floor to start so Carmella, the fan favorite, tries and fails at a headlock. Alexa's attempt at coming in off the top goes horribly as Nia is waiting on her and it's time for a break.
Back with Carmella headscissoring Nia into the post, which brings Alexa back in to slam Carmella's head off the mat for two. Bliss yells a lot and knocks Nia outside, followed by a Vader Bomb for two. The backflip into the knees to the chest get two on Carmella and Bliss drives two knees into Nia for good measure. The Sparkle Splash gets two on Jax with Bliss making the save. Nia has had enough of this being in trouble and gets up to shove both of them down like they're nothing.
The blondes send a charging Nia out to the floor but Carmella's dive is easily caught by the monster. Bliss makes the save though and it's Carmella diving onto Nia again with a lot more success this time. Back in and Carmella snapmares Bliss into the corner for the Bronco Buster. The leg crossface brings Nia back in for the save, only to have Carmella get two off a middle rope Thesz press. Graves actually says he's never seen that before. Nia breaks up the Bronco Buster though and drops the leg on Carmella for the pin at 12:30.
Post match Asuka comes out to stare Nia down. The champ comes down to the ring and Nia threatens to drop her where she stands to end the show.
Results
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa b. TM61 Running knee/superkick to Thorn
No Way Jose b. Jonathan Ortagun Cobra clutch slam
Nia Jax b. Carmella and Alexa Bliss Legdrop to Carmella
Thursday
Smackdown
Date: May 26, 2016
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo
It's actually a big night here as we have two title matches on a single show. First of all we have Miz defending the Intercontinental Title against Cesaro after the champion lost a non-title match this past Monday on Raw. The second title match will see the new US Champion Rusev defending against Kalisto in the masked man's rematch. Let's get to it.
The opening video recaps Monday's Money in the Bank qualifying matches.
Opening sequence.
Michael Cole is in the ring with the Money in the Bank briefcase and brings out Dean Ambrose for a chat. Dean says he loves getting violent and the idea of being in a seven man ladder match sounds great to him. This brings out Kevin Owens to tell Cole to get out of the ring because Owens is sick enough of him on Raw. Owens says there's no way Dean is winning that briefcase because he's ready to climb the ladder, just like he did at Wrestlemania.
Cue Sami Zayn (Lawler: The man with the stupid hat.) to say this isn't a joke because he's going after everything at Money in the Bank. Now it's Alberto Del Rio (who hasn't qualified) to say he's cashed in before and he'll do it again here tonight. Sami turns to yell at him and gets decked by Owens. The three in the ring start brawling and Sami vs. Dean is teased.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Zack Ryder vs. Alberto Del Rio
Beating Ryder is almost a running joke at this point. Alberto kicks him down and chokes on the ropes to start, only to get kicked into the barricade as we take an early break. Back with Del Rio working on a chinlock and a clip of Del Rio hitting the double stomp on the floor during the break. Ryder fights up but misses his middle rope dropkick.
The low superkick gets two for Alberto, only to have Zack grab a jawbreaker. The Broski Boot gives Ryder a near fall of his own but Del Rio counters the Rough Ryder. He can't the top rope double stomp though and walks into the Rough Ryder for no cover as Del Rio gets outside. Back in and the cross armbreaker makes Ryder tap at 9:35. Well that could have been shorter.
Video on Sunday's main event and Seth Rollins' return, including the announcement of the Money in the Bank title match.
Here are Enzo and Cass with something to say but before Enzo can get anywhere, here are the Dudleyz to interrupt (Lawler: WOOHOO! Thank goodness.). Enzo says he isn't Willy Wonka so he won't suger coat anything. The Dudleyz are as sweet as a Cinnabon and he isn't biting his tongue when he's chewing someone out. Cass offers to throw them a beatdown right now but the Dudleyz say not tonight. Instead, we'll do this on Raw but for now, Bubba asks D-Von if they can please get out of this town.
Rusev says after tonight, Kalisto will never be able to fly again.
Video on Cesaro making Miz tap at Extreme Rules and then pinning him the next night on Raw.
US Title: Kalisto vs. Rusev
Rusev is defending after defeating Kalisto on Sunday. During Kalisto's entrance, Byron almost casually mentions the impending Brand Split. Kalisto goes right after him to start and sends Rusev to the ropes with a headscissors. A springboard is knocked out of the air though and we take a break about thirty seconds in. Back with Kalisto being sent hard into the corner and actually trying to slam the champion. This works as well as you would expect and Rusev stomps away to stay in control.
Kalisto pops up again and gets the slam, which shocks the way too confident Rusev. A rollup gets two on Rusev and the corkscrew cross body gets the same. Kalisto follows up with a springboard moonsault to the floor for two as Lana looks.....well she looks normal actually. Rusev blocks the Salida Del Sol, only to miss a running headbutt in the corner. He's fine enough to raise his knees to block a 450 though and it's the jumping superkick and Accolade to retain the title at 8:53.
Rusev goes after Kalisto again post match until Titus O'Neil of all people comes in for the save. This is either a curve ball to make us think it's not going to be the start of Cena vs. Rusev on Monday or a very odd choice.
Video on Charlotte retaining on Sunday and then turning her back on her dad the next night. This is accompanied by clips of wrestlers talking about how horrible this was and how big of a mistake Charlotte really made, because how could she be good without Ric Flair? That look from Ric when he said nothing was wrong and left actually got to me a bit.
Natalya vs. Dana Brooke
Charlotte is on commentary. Natalya fires off some forearms in the corner but gets knocked down and put in the Sharpshooter, only to have Charlotte come in for the DQ at 45. This isn't exactly a wrestling heavy show tonight.
Natalya puts Charlotte in the Sharpshooter and then throws the villains together. Charlotte gets back up though and Natalya gets beaten down. They're really continuing this feud after Charlotte has beaten her twice?
Stills of Sunday's main event and video of the Club breaking up on Monday plus Owens pinning AJ Styles to qualify.
Styles doesn't know what he's doing next.
Golden Truth vs. Breezango
Truth and Breeze get things off but it's quickly off to Fandango who gets two off a dropkick. Fandango goes after Goldust to get him off the apron though, allowing Breeze to sneak in a Supermodel Kick to give give Fandango the pin at 1:40.
Post break Goldust tries to convince Truth that the team needs to stick together. Breezango comes in and laughs at them so Truth agrees to keep going.
Here's Seth Rollins for a talk. In case you missed it, he's back and couldn't be better. Unfortunately he can't say the same for the fans and that's that.
Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Cesaro
Miz is defending. Cesaro dropkicks him out to the floor to start and cannonballs down onto the champ as we take another early break. Back with Miz going after the shoulder and sending it into the post and barricade. The champ slaps on an armbar until Cesaro fights up with the uppercuts. Miz gets two off a Reality Check before distracting the referee so Maryse can rip off the turnbuckle pad.
Cesaro blocks the steel though and gets two off a small package. The Sharpshooter doesn't work either as Miz gets to the rope and tries to leave with the title. Instead he eats the running European uppercut for two. The Swing is kicked away though and Cesaro goes shoulder first into the buckle. Miz grabs the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin to retain at 10:31.
Results
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder Cross armbreaker
Rusev b. Kalisto Accolade
Natalya b. Dana Brooke via DQ when Charlotte interfered
Breezango b. Golden Truth Supermodel Kick to R-Truth
The Miz b. Cesaro Skull Crushing Finale
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Sami Zayn b. Sheamus Helluva Kick
New Day b. Social Outcasts Midnight Hour to Slater
Cesaro b. The Miz Neutralizer
Chris Jericho b. Apollo Crews Codebreaker
Big Cass b. Bubba Ray Dudley Empire Elbow
Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler Dirty Deeds
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles Pop Up Powerbomb
Impact Wrestling
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered
Al Snow b. Grado Snow Plow
Trevor Lee b. Eddie Edwards, Andrew Everett and DJZ Lee pulled down the title
Gail Kim b. Sienna Sunset flip
Jeff Hardy b. Tyrus/Rockstar Spud Jeff pulled down the contract
NXT
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa b. TM61 Running knee/superkick to Thorn
No Way Jose b. Jonathan Ortagun Cobra clutch slam
Nia Jax b. Carmella and Alexa Bliss Legdrop to Carmella
Smackdown
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder Cross armbreaker
Rusev b. Kalisto Accolade
Natalya b. Dana Brooke via DQ when Charlotte interfered
Breezango b. Golden Truth Supermodel Kick to R-Truth
The Miz b. Cesaro Skull Crushing Finale
Adam Rose has been released.
Monday Night Raw
Date: May 23, 2016
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
We're past Extreme Rules and now on to Money in the Bank season, meaning we might start tonight with some qualifying matches. However, the bigger story coming out of last night is the return of Seth Rollins, who attacked WWE World Champion Roman Reigns after Reigns retained over AJ Styles. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the main event and Rollins making his return.
Opening sequence.
Here's Seth to get things going, complete with a new graphic that says Redesign, Rebuild, Reclaim. He certainly looks like a face to start though I wouldn't put money on that one. Rollins gets a nice WELCOME BACK chant before smiling at the crowd and saying it's been 200 days since he's been in this ring. In case you've been living under a rock (or in case you're really not paying attention), he's back. He's here to get back the title that he never lost and last night he fired the first shot with the Pedigree on Reigns.
The fans keep freaking out so Rollins asks if they missed him. Fans: YES! YES! YES! Rollins brings up some of the dastardly things he's done over the years and about how the fans didn't buy him by calling him a coward who hid behind the Authority. Then his knee went out from all the weight of carrying this company. Over the last few months he's gotten so many fan letters but he put every one of them in a garbage can and set them on fire.
None of these fans were here with him when he was rehabbing his knee twice a day. Now he's back on his own to get the title back but here's Reigns to interrupt. Rollins of course bails and says it's happening on his time. This brings out Shane to invite Rollins back inside for an adult conversation. This conversation consists of Shane making Roman vs. Seth for the title at Money in the Bank.
Sheamus talks about how much he can't stand Sami Zayn and this New Era. Tonight he's going to give Sami a beating for all the people who are sick of this foreigner coming in with his stupid hat. Nothing wrong with a simple, old school pre-match promo.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Sami Zayn
Sheamus takes him down into a wristlock to start, followed by a legdrop of all things. Sami sends it outside with a hurricanrana, only to have Sheamus put a knee in his ribs to send us to a break. Back with Sheamus getting two off the Irish Curse but Sami BLASTS him with a clothesline and gets two off the Michinoku Driver. The Brogue Kick misses and Sami clotheslines him to the floor, only to have the flip dive blocked by a forearm. Sheamus gets back in and eats a quick Helluva Kick for the pin at 10:00.
Post match Sheamus is furious.
After a break, Apollo Crews is talking about how this is the biggest match of his life when Sheamus jumps him from behind and lays him out.
Here's New Day for a six man tag and they've got a birthday cake. Tonight is the 1,200th episode of Monday Night Raw and that means it's time to celebrate. However, since cakes in wrestling rings always end up in someone's face, Big E. picks up the cake and takes it outside to get things out of the way. As he threatens Byron Saxton, cue the Social Outcasts to jump New Day from behind and take us to a break.
New Day vs. Social Outcasts
Joined in progress with Kofi hurricanranaing Slater out of the corner and stomping him down in the corner. Slater is sent to the floor for a Bo Train but Heath collapses, leaving the other two to take a flip dive from Woods. The Midnight Hour puts Slater away at 2:00.
Slater takes the cake post match.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. The Miz
Non-title. Before the match, Miz and Maryse celebrate their win and promise to win the briefcase again, setting up Miz's biopic. Cesaro starts fast with the uppercuts in the corner for two before diving over the top to take Miz out again. He even tells Maryse to talk to the hand, taking us back to about 1997.
Back in and Cesaro gets two more off a delayed suplex to send Miz outside as we take a break. We come back with Miz hitting the Reality Check but charging into the uppercut. The Swing doesn't work because of the shoulder but Miz can't hit the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead it's another uppercut and the Neutralizer for the pin on Miz (of course) at 11:24.
We recap the opening segment.
Rollins talks about how Money in the Bank is his thing when Stephanie comes in. Rollins is all nice to her but she says things have changed around here.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Chris Jericho vs. Apollo Crews
Crews seems just fine after the beatdown earlier tonight while Jericho's back is covered in bandages from the thumbtacks. Jericho throws a t-shirt in Crews' face to start and hammers away, only to have Crews just hit him in the bandages because Crews has an IQ above butter. Jericho's dropkick and chinlock don't do much as Apollo elbows him in the jaw and avoids the dropkick out of the corner to send Jericho outside.
There's a moonsault from the apron (mostly missed) to drop Jericho again but Jericho counters the toss powerbomb into the Walls. A rope is grabbed and Crews tries to nip up, only to have Jericho Lionsault onto him for two. Another Walls attempt is countered into a small package, only to have the Codebreaker puts Apollo away at 7:46.
Sheamus laughs at the result.
Life Lesson with Bob Backlund from Smackdown.
Baron Corbin beat Dolph Ziggler last night because he can. This brings in Ziggler, to say Corbin can't beat him in a straight match. Corbin agrees but doesn't want to see Ziggler again after. Ziggler promises to steal the show tonight.
Here's Big Cass, who points to the entrance for the returning Enzo Amore. Enzo is VERY fired up to be back and talks about how he's back because if he had a dime for every time he got knocked down and didn't get back up, he would have ZERO DIMES. Cass is ready to kick Bubba Ray Dudley in the head and send him into a pool like a basketball.
Big Cass vs. Bubba Ray Dudley
Feeling out process to start until D-Von goes after Enzo, allowing Bubba to get in a belly to back suplex. He spends too much time shouting though, allowing Cass to take over with a clothesline. A Stinger Splash has Bubba in trouble and we keep up the Sting treatment with Cass slamming him off the top. Cass' big boot and the empire Elbow put Bubba away at 3:11.
Here are Charlotte, Ric Flair and Dana Brooke to talk about their win last night. Ric....oh my goodness he is BOMBED. Anyway, Ric talks about how Charlotte has earned her way to the top and been amazing at everything she's done. As for Dana, she doesn't exist without Charlotte, which Dana seems to agree with. Charlotte talks about how her dad was never there for her on Christmas and birthdays because Flair was off being the man. Now Charlotte gets it though because now she's the woman.
That power makes her be able to say it to him: get out of her ring. Charlotte goes on a rant about how she doesn't need her dad anymore and how she's going to be better than the sixteen time World Champion has ever been. She's tired of having everyone look at her and ask how Ric is doing so now he is dead to her. Charlotte doesn't want to talk and tells Ric to get out because he can watch her on TV like she did with him for thirty years. Ric leaves in tears while Charlotte and Dana pose. Charlotte still needs practice talking but this worked exactly as it was supposed to.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler headlocks him to the mat to start but Dean slams him with ease and throws Dolph out to the floor. The dive doesn't get to launch as Ziggler steps to the side as we take a break. Back with Ziggler getting butterfly superplexed for two but missing a dive. Dean's top rope elbow is countered into a rollup for two, followed by the Fameasser for the same.
Both guys try cross bodies at the same time and we get a quick breather. Dean gets superkicked to little effect as he bounces off the ropes with the rebound lariat for two. Ambrose goes for the elbow again but gets dropkicked out of the air this time. The Zig Zag is countered though and Dirty Deeds sends Dean to the ladder match at 12:09.
Ric is leaving and even Arn Anderson can't make him feel better. Renee Young asks if he has anything to say but Ric gives a very sad forced smile and leaves. That was one of the best scenes I've seen in wrestling in a long time. Ric genuinely looked devastated and had nothing to say. It was quiet, it was emotional and it felt real.
The Shining Stars want us to visit Puerto Rico.
Here's AJ Styles with something to say before his match. AJ talks about how he would have been WWE Champion if not for Anderson and Gallows. This brings the big balds to the ring, where they question what he just said. AJ didn't bring these guys to the WWE to take out everyone in his way but the way they see it, if this was in Japan, Styles would have been buying them a round of drinks after what happened last night.
AJ thinks it's time for them to go their separate ways but Anderson and Gallows suggest that AJ never would have made it out of Japan (or a bunch of bar fights for that matter) without them. Styles says they're still brothers and friends but not on the same team. Gallows says no way because they're not even friends anymore. That seems to be fine with AJ as the two of them leave.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens
They slug it out to start until Owens grabs a headlock (HEADLOCK MASTER!), only to eat a good dropkick for two. Owens gets in a dropkick of his own but AJ bails to the apron. AJ is pulled face first into the apron with Owens heading back inside but rolling under the ropes instead of diving over the top like he was teasing. As usual he's the best troll in wrestling.
Back from a break with AJ fighting out of a sleeper and hammering away on the floor. They slug it out inside with AJ getting the better of it, only to be pulled off the ropes and sent into the corner with a German suplex. The Cannonball is followed by Owens telling Cole to shut up but AJ gets in a jumping enziguri. That's fine with Owens who comes back with his brainbuster onto the knee for two but misses the moonsault.
AJ sends him outside and knees him in the jaw, only to eat the Pop Up Powerbomb onto the steps. Somehow AJ beats the count back in (that's a bit much) and gets in a quick Pele. He really shouldn't be up that fast after a finisher onto the steps but finishers haven't meant anything in WWE in forever. The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up though and the Pop Up Powerbomb gives Owens the pin at 16:20.
Results
Sami Zayn b. Sheamus Helluva Kick
New Day b. Social Outcasts Midnight Hour to Slater
Cesaro b. The Miz Neutralizer
Chris Jericho b. Apollo Crews Codebreaker
Big Cass b. Bubba Ray Dudley Empire Elbow
Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler Dirty Deeds
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles Pop Up Powerbomb
Tuesday
Eden Stiles has been granted her release from WWE.
Impact Wrestling
Date: May 24, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
It's a big show tonight with May Mayhem, meaning things are a bit more violent than the regular shows. As you might guess, this is a show that was announced a week ago with almost no other build. The big match tonight is Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III as Carter tries to get his rematch with Mike Bennett. Let's get to it.
The opening video focuses on everything we're getting to see tonight.
Here's Matt Hardy for a chat before his match with Ethan. Matt now has half black and half white hair (divided down the middle) which looks like Bozo the Clown's. Before the match Matt talks about how he has evolved into something more dangerous. He sees this match as nothing more than a warmup for his match with Jeff at Slammiversary.
With something like a weak British accent, Matt says he has a contract for the match with his brother Nero, which brings out Rockstar Spud and Tyrus. Spud says he's dedicated his life to Matt Hardy. Matt: As you should. That accent is REALLY weird and comes off like Matt trying to be all intelligent and brilliant and it's really just creepy.
Spud blames the fans for this going too far but Tyrus really doesn't care. Matt says it's ok to say he looks like a psychotic lunatic. He has a deal for Nero tonight: if Nero can beat Spud and Tyrus in a ladder match, there will be a match between the brothers at Slammiversary. If Jeff loses though, there's no match. Also if Jeff wins, Spud and Tyrus are done associating with Matt. This felt like someone shouting LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME and trying to be all interesting but coming off as a guy who is more sad than anything else. As usual, Matt is in over his head and is nowhere near as brilliant as he thinks he is.
Ethan Carter III vs. Matt Hardy
Matt pounds away in the corner as we hear about how amazing a transformation he's undergone to become this lunatic. Carter charges into a boot to the face and gets elbowed in the jaw to keep him down. A bulldog out of the corner gets two for Matt and he whips Carter into the corner.
The slow pace continues with a legdrop until Carter comes back with a jawbreaker, only to miss a splash in the corner. Here's Mike Bennett to watch as Matt gets two off a Side Effect. The Twist of Fate is countered into a cobra clutch but Bennett comes in for the DQ at 6:40. The stipulation said that Carter had to win by pin/submission to get his shot so Ethan gets nothing.
Mike lays Carter out post match and says that he has failed. There will be no rematch at Slammiversary.
Post break Bennett says what he just did was art and you don't have to explain art. A few weeks ago he had a vision for EC3's Road to Redemption. Well now Ethan has failed because he didn't get the job done, meaning no match at Slammiversary. This was just repeating what was said earlier.
Here's Allie to introduce Maria for a speech. Maria talks about how she's taking over the new future for the Knockouts and Velvet Sky is part of the past. This brings out Gail Kim, who says Maria manipulated her way to the top of the division. They argue over Velvet being fired with Maria saying she put on her boots just like Gail told her to and she attained power. Gail offers to beat her up right now but Maria threatens to have her fired. This results in Gail being put in a match with her career on the line, which brings in Sienna for a cheap shot from behind. Who is actually begging to see Gail vs. Maria in a straight match?
Grado promises Mahabali Shera that he'll take care of Al Snow tonight. Grado has a chain wrapped around his fist while Shera eats what looks like a drumstick.
The BroMans call each other from about a foot away. Robbie thinks they need to move up a few levels while Jesse keeps stopping to talk to people. Apparently Robbie has found them a guru to take it to another level. A woman comes up to point out that they're right next to each other and Robbie blames Jesse for not paying attention.
Gail rants about how angry she is.
We recap Al Snow vs. Grado in your standard I'm old and grizzled and you're not serious enough feud. Snow claims to be a pure athlete and keeps cheating to win matches.
Al Snow vs. Grado
Street fight. Before the match, Snow asks if the fans want violence, chairs and tables. Well even if they do, they're not going to get it because he's a wrestler. Snow: I'm your mom's favorite wrestler! Naturally he hides behind the set and jumps Grado from behind to start things off. The bell hasn't rung yet as Snow slams Grado's hand into the steps. They head inside for the bell with Snow slamming him down but missing the moonsault.
Snow's powder is thrown back into his face as Shera brings in a trashcan full of weapons. Grado spanks him with a cookie sheet and it's time for the drumstick (as in a bone with meat on it) for a low blow. A chain punch hits Grado in the jaw but here are two newcomers (NXT's Marcus Louis and Sylvester LeFort) to pull the referee out. The distraction lets Snow hit the Snow Plow for the pin at 3:39.
Matt Hardy (of course) is sitting in the dark when Reby comes in to ask what's wrong. We get another monologue about how Matt needs to get rid of Nero for his life to continue. Reby talks about how he's alienating everyone but Matt doesn't care because it's all about Nero.
Jeremy Borash is in the ring to talk about the end of last week's show when Lashley interrupts. Lashley rants about how many fights he's had without twenty idiots interrupting but here's Drew Galloway to cut him off. Drew says Lashley can lay claim to being the only real fighter on the roster but he'll stick to the title of World Heavyweight Champion. Last week he saw fear in Lashley's eyes but Lashley doesn't want to hear it.
Drew comes to the ring for a fight but Dixie Carter comes out to say this is ridiculous. Yeah we need to cut out this action on a wrestling show. I for one would love another Matt Hardy monologue right about now. Dixie makes the rematch for Slammiversary with only submissions or knockouts for the win. If I'm Drew, I'd be rather ticked off by that but of course he's fine with everything.
Lashley calls him out and the fight is on again with Drew hitting a Claymore and pounding away. Security's intervention only slows Drew down, allowing Lashley to get in a spear and hammer away. A referee gets speared and Lashley chokes Drew out with a belt. Lashley isn't done yet and takes off his shirt but does nothing.
X-Division Title: Andrew Everett vs. Eddie Edwards vs. DJZ vs. Trevor Lee
Lee is defending and this is Ultimate X with the belt hung at the intersection of two cables. The first person to climb up and pull it down is champion. We come back from a break after Eddie's entrance with the rest of the entrances because we haven't wasted enough time on this show yet. Shane helms is out with Lee and Everett, who are introduced as a team. Eddie dives over the top to take out Everett before the bell rings.
It's a huge brawl to start of course until Everett dropkicks everyone down and goes for the belt, only to have Lee pull him down and swear a bit. Helms tells his boys to calm down and Everett lets Lee get on his shoulders to help him get tot he belt. Eddie and DJZ come in for the save (why this isn't a tag match and non-title is beyond me) with DJZ elbowing both heels in the jaw.
Edwards hurricanranas both of them down at the same time but Lee knees him in the face. DJZ pops up and rolls forward into a DDT on Trevor to knock the champ silly. Eddie goes up and pulls down the title, only to have Shane distract the referee so Trevor can steal the belt to retain at 5:59.
Maria has chosen Sienna to take out Gail Kim by ripping out her heart.
Ethan talks about playing rigged games all his life. There is no honor in what Bennett did but the rematch is going to happen no matter what. Ethan is about to make a phone call he's going to regret. Bennett was comparing himself to artists but those people had a life's work. After Ethan is done, Mike isn't even going to have a life. As usual, really good stuff here from Ethan as he kept it simple and responded to everything Mike said while advancing the story.
Sienna vs. Gail Kim
Allie and Maria are at ringside and Gail's career is on the line. Sienna jumps Gail from behind but gets knocked away, allowing Gail to hit a quick high cross body for two. A hurricanrana takes both of them outside but Maria helps Sienna up, allowing her to send Gail into the barricade. Back in and a Samoan drop gets two for Sienna but Gail comes back with a reverse DDT. Maria shoves Gail off the ropes, only to have her reverse the spinning faceplant into a sunset flip to pin Sienna at 4:13.
Sienna drops Gail post match and Maria pounds away.
Rockstar Spud begs Tyrus to win tonight for Matt's sake. Reby comes in and says do it for her sake because Matt is insane over this Jeff stuff. Spud says having Matt back to normal is worth anything.
The BroMans go to meet their guru and it's....actually a woman, who has purple hair and is in great shape. Her name is Raquel (Gabi from last year's Tough Enough) and apparently she's the guru they've been looking for. After a hard workout, she says she'll see them in the pool.
Lashley and Drew Galloway will pick each other's opponents next week.
Rockstar Spud/Tyrus vs. Jeff Hardy
Ladder match. If Jeff wins, he faces Matt at Slammiversary in a Full Metal Mayhem match and Spud/Tyrus are done associating with Matt. If Jeff loses, there's no match and Matt is happy anyway. Jeff hands out what looks like CDs during his entrance, which is actually not a horrible idea. Spud jumps Jeff before the bell (because we haven't seen that tonight) but Tyrus posts himself and gets a chair thrown at his back. Jeff throws in a ladder and we go to a break without the match actually starting.
The match is joined in progress with Tyrus pulling a ladder to send Jeff throat first into the ropes. A legdrop between Jeff's legs should allow Tyrus to just sit on him so Spud can climb but instead Tyrus picks him up. Spud drops a top rope elbow and goes to get a ladder as Tyrus lifts Jeff up again.
Tyrus splashes Spud by mistake but Jeff can't follow up. Spud is sent out to the floor and Tyrus tries to climb, only to be too heavy and break the rungs. Jeff laughs at him as Spud comes back in, only to have Tyrus get knocked outside. Spud goes up but gets caught in a Twist of Fate onto the top of the ladder, allowing Jeff to pull down the contract at 5:10.
Matt comes out to stare at Jeff to end the show.
Results
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered
Al Snow b. Grado Snow Plow
Trevor Lee b. Eddie Edwards, Andrew Everett and DJZ Lee pulled down the title
Gail Kim b. Sienna Sunset flip
Jeff Hardy b. Tyrus/Rockstar Spud Jeff pulled down the contract
Wednesday
WWE has announced a new Brand Split with Smackdown moving to Tuesdays where it will air live. There will be a Draft held at some point before July 19.
NXT
Date: May 25, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
We're two weeks out from Takeover and after last week, most of the card is set. The big story is the announcement of the first ever steel cage match around these parts as NXT Champion Samoa Joe is defending against former champion Finn Balor. Other than that it looks like we'll be getting Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Austin Aries as well. Let's get to it.
William Regal tells us that Bayley is injured and unable to face Asuka for the Women's Title. Therefore tonight there will be a triple threat for the #1 contendership between Nia Jax, Alexa Bliss and Carmella.
Opening sequence.
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa vs. TM61
TM61 is the recently signed The Mighty Don't Kneel, comprised of Shane Thorn and Nick Miller. In a quick pre-match inset promo, TM61 says they're here for the titles because they're mighty and don't kneel. Miller and Ciampa hit the mat to start before it's off to Thorn, who gyrates and sticks his chest out as he walks around. Gargano gets pulled down in the corner for a double wishbone as things settle down a bit. Johnny crawls through Nick's legs for the hot tag, only to have Ciampa eat a double elbow to the jaw. TM61 actually stands tall as we go to a break.
Back with Miller holding Ciampa in a headlock until an elbow to the jaw allows Gargano to get the tag and spear Miller through the ropes. Thorn comes in but gets caught in something like an Anaconda Vice with Gargano using his legs as a crucifix. Ciampa is back in and elbows Thorn again, only to eat a dropkick for the tag off to Miller. Nick comes in and starts cleaning house, capped off by a delayed backdrop into a neckbreaker from Thorn. Gargano dives onto Miller, leaving Thorn to take the knee to the head/superkick combo for the pin at 13:13.
Gargano and Ciampa applaud TM61.
Video on Samoa Joe winning the title and his new found aggression.
Bayley is upset that she can't compete when Nia Jax comes in to say that she's broken Bayley, who will never be the same again. Carmella runs in to defend her friend but Nia laughs it off. Alexa Bliss comes in and gets the same treatment.
Andrade Cien Almas takes off his mask while watching old lucha libre.
Here's Austin Aries with something to say. Aries is tired of hearing people talk about how someone is the best. You're only the best until someone better comes along, so he's always called himself great. But how do you define greatness? Maybe by proving your talent over ten years? Or by having great matches everywhere you go? Or by being a champion in every promotion you've ever been? See, he's done all those things but he's tired of being overlooked. The fans chant for Nakamura but Aries wants a shot at the winner of the cage match. There go the lights and here comes Nakamura.
Shinsuke starts in Japanese then corrects himself because Aries doesn't understand. Nakamura: You don't speak Japanese? Aries: I don't understand you. Nakamura: Yeah me either. Shinsuke says the title isn't coming to greatness because it's coming to the King of Strong Style. Cue Regal, which draws a TAKEOVER chant. The match is made though nothing is mentioned about being #1 contender.
American Alpha is ready for the Revival because there's more to wrestling than punching people in the face. It doesn't matter if it's in Dallas or at Full Sail, they'll be ready, willing and Gable.
No Way Jose vs. Jonathan Ortagun
Jose dances out of a waistlock to start and it's already time for an airplane spin, which goes both ways for a little extra fun. A clothesline in the corner just annoys Jose and things get serious, including an atomic drop and the baseball punch. The corba clutch slam gives Jose the pin at 3:21.
Jose dances with the announcers post match.
Video on Finn Balor, who wants the title back.
Asuka doesn't care who she faces at Takeover because she will defeat them.
Carmella vs. Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss
For the #1 contendership at Takeover. Bayley hugs Carmella before her entrance. Nia has a new entrance where the camera cuts to an extreme closeup of her eyes before she starts walking. Bliss bails to the floor to start so Carmella, the fan favorite, tries and fails at a headlock. Alexa's attempt at coming in off the top goes horribly as Nia is waiting on her and it's time for a break.
Back with Carmella headscissoring Nia into the post, which brings Alexa back in to slam Carmella's head off the mat for two. Bliss yells a lot and knocks Nia outside, followed by a Vader Bomb for two. The backflip into the knees to the chest get two on Carmella and Bliss drives two knees into Nia for good measure. The Sparkle Splash gets two on Jax with Bliss making the save. Nia has had enough of this being in trouble and gets up to shove both of them down like they're nothing.
The blondes send a charging Nia out to the floor but Carmella's dive is easily caught by the monster. Bliss makes the save though and it's Carmella diving onto Nia again with a lot more success this time. Back in and Carmella snapmares Bliss into the corner for the Bronco Buster. The leg crossface brings Nia back in for the save, only to have Carmella get two off a middle rope Thesz press. Graves actually says he's never seen that before. Nia breaks up the Bronco Buster though and drops the leg on Carmella for the pin at 12:30.
Post match Asuka comes out to stare Nia down. The champ comes down to the ring and Nia threatens to drop her where she stands to end the show.
Results
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa b. TM61 Running knee/superkick to Thorn
No Way Jose b. Jonathan Ortagun Cobra clutch slam
Nia Jax b. Carmella and Alexa Bliss Legdrop to Carmella
Thursday
Smackdown
Date: May 26, 2016
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo
It's actually a big night here as we have two title matches on a single show. First of all we have Miz defending the Intercontinental Title against Cesaro after the champion lost a non-title match this past Monday on Raw. The second title match will see the new US Champion Rusev defending against Kalisto in the masked man's rematch. Let's get to it.
The opening video recaps Monday's Money in the Bank qualifying matches.
Opening sequence.
Michael Cole is in the ring with the Money in the Bank briefcase and brings out Dean Ambrose for a chat. Dean says he loves getting violent and the idea of being in a seven man ladder match sounds great to him. This brings out Kevin Owens to tell Cole to get out of the ring because Owens is sick enough of him on Raw. Owens says there's no way Dean is winning that briefcase because he's ready to climb the ladder, just like he did at Wrestlemania.
Cue Sami Zayn (Lawler: The man with the stupid hat.) to say this isn't a joke because he's going after everything at Money in the Bank. Now it's Alberto Del Rio (who hasn't qualified) to say he's cashed in before and he'll do it again here tonight. Sami turns to yell at him and gets decked by Owens. The three in the ring start brawling and Sami vs. Dean is teased.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Zack Ryder vs. Alberto Del Rio
Beating Ryder is almost a running joke at this point. Alberto kicks him down and chokes on the ropes to start, only to get kicked into the barricade as we take an early break. Back with Del Rio working on a chinlock and a clip of Del Rio hitting the double stomp on the floor during the break. Ryder fights up but misses his middle rope dropkick.
The low superkick gets two for Alberto, only to have Zack grab a jawbreaker. The Broski Boot gives Ryder a near fall of his own but Del Rio counters the Rough Ryder. He can't the top rope double stomp though and walks into the Rough Ryder for no cover as Del Rio gets outside. Back in and the cross armbreaker makes Ryder tap at 9:35. Well that could have been shorter.
Video on Sunday's main event and Seth Rollins' return, including the announcement of the Money in the Bank title match.
Here are Enzo and Cass with something to say but before Enzo can get anywhere, here are the Dudleyz to interrupt (Lawler: WOOHOO! Thank goodness.). Enzo says he isn't Willy Wonka so he won't suger coat anything. The Dudleyz are as sweet as a Cinnabon and he isn't biting his tongue when he's chewing someone out. Cass offers to throw them a beatdown right now but the Dudleyz say not tonight. Instead, we'll do this on Raw but for now, Bubba asks D-Von if they can please get out of this town.
Rusev says after tonight, Kalisto will never be able to fly again.
Video on Cesaro making Miz tap at Extreme Rules and then pinning him the next night on Raw.
US Title: Kalisto vs. Rusev
Rusev is defending after defeating Kalisto on Sunday. During Kalisto's entrance, Byron almost casually mentions the impending Brand Split. Kalisto goes right after him to start and sends Rusev to the ropes with a headscissors. A springboard is knocked out of the air though and we take a break about thirty seconds in. Back with Kalisto being sent hard into the corner and actually trying to slam the champion. This works as well as you would expect and Rusev stomps away to stay in control.
Kalisto pops up again and gets the slam, which shocks the way too confident Rusev. A rollup gets two on Rusev and the corkscrew cross body gets the same. Kalisto follows up with a springboard moonsault to the floor for two as Lana looks.....well she looks normal actually. Rusev blocks the Salida Del Sol, only to miss a running headbutt in the corner. He's fine enough to raise his knees to block a 450 though and it's the jumping superkick and Accolade to retain the title at 8:53.
Rusev goes after Kalisto again post match until Titus O'Neil of all people comes in for the save. This is either a curve ball to make us think it's not going to be the start of Cena vs. Rusev on Monday or a very odd choice.
Video on Charlotte retaining on Sunday and then turning her back on her dad the next night. This is accompanied by clips of wrestlers talking about how horrible this was and how big of a mistake Charlotte really made, because how could she be good without Ric Flair? That look from Ric when he said nothing was wrong and left actually got to me a bit.
Natalya vs. Dana Brooke
Charlotte is on commentary. Natalya fires off some forearms in the corner but gets knocked down and put in the Sharpshooter, only to have Charlotte come in for the DQ at 45. This isn't exactly a wrestling heavy show tonight.
Natalya puts Charlotte in the Sharpshooter and then throws the villains together. Charlotte gets back up though and Natalya gets beaten down. They're really continuing this feud after Charlotte has beaten her twice?
Stills of Sunday's main event and video of the Club breaking up on Monday plus Owens pinning AJ Styles to qualify.
Styles doesn't know what he's doing next.
Golden Truth vs. Breezango
Truth and Breeze get things off but it's quickly off to Fandango who gets two off a dropkick. Fandango goes after Goldust to get him off the apron though, allowing Breeze to sneak in a Supermodel Kick to give give Fandango the pin at 1:40.
Post break Goldust tries to convince Truth that the team needs to stick together. Breezango comes in and laughs at them so Truth agrees to keep going.
Here's Seth Rollins for a talk. In case you missed it, he's back and couldn't be better. Unfortunately he can't say the same for the fans and that's that.
Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Cesaro
Miz is defending. Cesaro dropkicks him out to the floor to start and cannonballs down onto the champ as we take another early break. Back with Miz going after the shoulder and sending it into the post and barricade. The champ slaps on an armbar until Cesaro fights up with the uppercuts. Miz gets two off a Reality Check before distracting the referee so Maryse can rip off the turnbuckle pad.
Cesaro blocks the steel though and gets two off a small package. The Sharpshooter doesn't work either as Miz gets to the rope and tries to leave with the title. Instead he eats the running European uppercut for two. The Swing is kicked away though and Cesaro goes shoulder first into the buckle. Miz grabs the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin to retain at 10:31.
Results
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder Cross armbreaker
Rusev b. Kalisto Accolade
Natalya b. Dana Brooke via DQ when Charlotte interfered
Breezango b. Golden Truth Supermodel Kick to R-Truth
The Miz b. Cesaro Skull Crushing Finale
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Sami Zayn b. Sheamus Helluva Kick
New Day b. Social Outcasts Midnight Hour to Slater
Cesaro b. The Miz Neutralizer
Chris Jericho b. Apollo Crews Codebreaker
Big Cass b. Bubba Ray Dudley Empire Elbow
Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler Dirty Deeds
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles Pop Up Powerbomb
Impact Wrestling
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered
Al Snow b. Grado Snow Plow
Trevor Lee b. Eddie Edwards, Andrew Everett and DJZ Lee pulled down the title
Gail Kim b. Sienna Sunset flip
Jeff Hardy b. Tyrus/Rockstar Spud Jeff pulled down the contract
NXT
Johnny Gargano/Tommaso Ciampa b. TM61 Running knee/superkick to Thorn
No Way Jose b. Jonathan Ortagun Cobra clutch slam
Nia Jax b. Carmella and Alexa Bliss Legdrop to Carmella
Smackdown
Alberto Del Rio b. Zack Ryder Cross armbreaker
Rusev b. Kalisto Accolade
Natalya b. Dana Brooke via DQ when Charlotte interfered
Breezango b. Golden Truth Supermodel Kick to R-Truth
The Miz b. Cesaro Skull Crushing Finale