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Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Teddy Long is official for the WWE Hall of Fame.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 2017
Location: T-Mobile Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves
It's a pretty stacked show this week as Bayley gets a shot at Charlotte's Raw Women's Title, Emmalina (allegedly) debuts and Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens have a Festival of Friendship. We're getting closer to Fastlane and it's time to really start setting up the pay per view card. Let's get to it.
This show is dedicated to Chavo Guerrero Sr. It's always nice to see them do something like that, even if it's something minor.
Opening sequence.
Here's a dancing Stephanie (so she's good this week) to welcome us to the show. She's given Mick Foley the night off tonight and hopes he'll have his head on straight next week. Stephanie is in charge this week though but here's Roman Reigns to cut her off. Reigns wants to fight Braun Strowman right here tonight and the fans seem to agree. Stephanie doesn't though and threatens Reigns with the loss of his match against Strowman if he does anything tonight.
Anderson and Gallows of all people interrupt and say they're tired of hearing Stephanie disrespected like this. That means a handicap match tonight with Stephanie doing a bad Teddy Long impression to set it up. Anderson and Gallows get punched in the face to start it off.
Anderson and Gallows vs. Roman Reigns
This is joined in progress after a break with Reigns and Gallows slugging it out. The champs quickly take over and Anderson grabs a chinlock to fill in some time. Reigns fights up and starts throwing bombs, only to get caught by a cheap shot from the apron. Anderson and Gallows start stomping away and that's a DQ at 3:09.
Reigns clears the champs off without too much trouble.
Quick video on the history of the List of Jericho.
Kofi Kingston vs. Bo Dallas
Before the match, Kofi asks if Dallas is trying to be a Social Outcast. Big E. on the other hand has a folder labeled Ice Cream Blueprints because New Day is making an ice cream machine. That starts a WE WANT ICE CREAM chant as Kofi dropkicks Dallas to the floor. Dallas gets into the dancing and RIPS UP THE FOLDER. New Day is aghast so Kofi hits a huge flip dive to take him down. Bo gets two off an elevated swinging neckbreaker but gets caught in the SOS for the pin at 2:13.
Dallas is covered in cereal after the match.
Neville is ready for a match tomorrow night when Jack Gallagher comes in. Jack starts to quote some Shakespeare but Neville cuts him off for not being a man. We'll find that out at Fastlane but for now, Jack calls him a pillock.
Video on Jericho helping Owens retain the title over Seth Rollins.
Noam Dar vs. Jack Gallagher
Alicia Fox is in Dar's corner and Graves thinks she's staring at Gallagher. Dar can't keep Jack in a leglock as we get some snappy British spinning for an escape. A hard kick to the knee softens the knee up a bit better but Dar switches over to the arm. Gallagher doesn't care for the switch in psychology so it's the headbutt into the running dropkick for the pin on Noam at 3:15.
Neville comes out for the staredown.
HHH and Samoa Joe arrive.
Here's Emmalina in a rather shiny dress. She talks about the wait and says she's finally here. Now we'll see the makeover from Emmalina to Emma....and that's it. She was on screen for less than a minute.
Bayley is in the same place where Lita won her first Women's Title from Stephanie McMahon, who doesn't think anything of her. Tonight though, Bayley is hitting the jackpot.
Jericho and Owens are getting ready when HHH comes in to take Owens away.
Mark Henry vs. Braun Strowman
They do the big power lockup to start and neither goes anywhere. The referee backs Henry up so Strowman gets in a cheap shot to take over. Strowman drops a leg and grabs a chinlock to keep thing slow. The forearm to the chest is broken up but Henry can't hit the World's Strongest Slam. Braun actually hits a dropkick followed by the powerslam for the pin at 3:53.
Post match Reigns comes out for the fight and knocks Strowman down with two Superman Punches. The spear is countered into the powerslam though and Reigns is laid out.
We look at Jericho helping Owens against Reigns.
Cesaro and Sheamus are firing Bayley up when Enzo and Big Cass come in. Trash is talked and it seems that we'll be seeing Cass vs. Cesaro later.
Michael Cole has a sitdown interview with Samoa Joe, who says he's working for HHH, who gave him his first shot at the big time. HHH has given more people opportunities than anyone else and Joe has spent eighteen years mowing everyone down to get here. Joe doesn't want to hear about HHH any more because this interview is about him. He's not some guy like Sami Zayn who is just happy to be here. Cole brings up all the people HHH has given opportunities to and then turned on them (including Shawn Michaels) but Joe says that's not happening because he doesn't need HHH. The Destroyer has been unleashed.
WOW this was great. Joe looked like one of the most natural stars ever here and a lot of that is likely because that's the Samoa Joe character who has been around for a long time. I could go for Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn (assuming Zayn isn't facing Jericho again) and as soon as Joe can strike out on his own and not be another HHH project, he'll be in the main event in about five seconds. Finally: BAHAHAHAHAHA TNA SCREWS UP AGAIN!!! They had this guy and decided that he needed to put over Sting instead of keeping the World Title. That's freaking hilarious.
Sami Zayn vs. Rusev
Sami backs away from a kick to the head to start but gets taken to the mat. The fans want Lana but have to settle for Sami fighting out of a headlock and chopping away. Sami knocks him outside for the big flip dive but Rusev just blasts him with a kick to the head to take us to a break. Back with Rusev grabbing a bearhug and throwing Sami off a fall away slam. Sami finally avoids a charge in the corner and they head outside, only to have Rusev blast him with a clothesline. As they get back in though, Sami scores with the Helluva Kick, his only major move of the match, for the pin at 11:00.
Post match Sami says he never gives up or sells out like Samoa Joe, so here's Joe to jump him. The beating begins and Sami gets choked out.
Teddy Long Hall of Fame video.
Ariya Daivari vs. Akira Tozawa
Brian Kendrick is on commentary and takes credit for the indy movement in WWE. They slug it out to start with Daivari looking freaked out by Tozawa's shouting. A kick to the chest and a backsplash get two but Tozawa misses a charge into the corner. Daivari drops a knee and grabs a sleeper. That goes nowhere so some fast kicks (with fast camera cuts) drop Daivari setting up the snap German suplex to give Tozawa the pin at 3:11.
Jericho introduces the Festival of Friendship and that means a bunch of showgirls coming out to welcome him to the ring. Jericho is in a shiny hat and jacket but Owens looks downright confused. There's a bunch of covered stuff set up in the ring and Jericho promises a bunch of gifts.
First up: a sculpture of what looks like two people intertwined. Owens: What is it? Apparently it cost $7,000 and while Owens wants to call it stupid, he calls it a steal. Next is a painting of Jericho and Owens' fingers touching ala the Michaelangelo painting. Jericho thinks it belongs over Owens' mantle. Owens: Chris I have two kids and you're not wearing pants! Jericho: It's art! You don't need pants!
Finally, Jericho has a magician named Friendship who does some basic tricks (I'm a sucker for magic so this is the highlight so far). Owens says he has a nine year old son with a magic kit and he can do the same trick. Jericho agrees on the bad performance so Friendship the Magician JUST MADE THE LIST! After admitting that he found the magician on Craigslist, Jericho says this is just the beginning.
The real present is calling out Goldberg, who is going to get......we go to and come back from a commercial break......IT! We get the music but it's Gillberg, who Owens promptly destroys. He's not happy though and wants to know what Jericho is thinking. Jericho says he did this for his best friend and promises that Owens will retain the title at Fastlane.
Owens smiles and says he has a gift for Jericho too. It's a NEW LIST....but Jericho's name is on it! Jericho pulls it out of the box and it's the LIST OF KO! Owens jumps Jericho and destroys him with the apron powerbomb. Jericho is sent into a big sign in the ring, leaving Owens to be showered in boos.
This was EXCELLENT and you could tell the crowd completely bought into the whole thing. The key here is simple: Jericho was doing something nice for his friend and Owens turned on him anyway. It makes Owens out to be a jerk while Jericho was a nice guy who was on the wrong side. That creates sympathy for Jericho and will make his face turn feel much more natural. Of course a lot of the heat goes away if Goldberg takes the title (though Jericho costing Owens would be nice) but Lesnar vs. Goldberg just couldn't get over on its own.
A bloody Jericho is stretchered out.
Cesaro vs. Enzo Amore
Before Cesaro comes out, Enzo accuses him of being a James Bond villain. Cesaro uppercuts the heck out of him to start and there's the gutwrench suplex. Back in and Enzo grabs the middle rope DDT, only to eat Swiss Death for the pin at 2:43.
Black History Month video on Rosa Parks.
Charlotte yells at Sasha Banks for being injured.
Women's Title: Bayley vs. Charlotte
Charlotte is defending and they start slowly here with the champ working on the arm. Bayley does the same with some armdrags but Charlotte slaps her in the face. That just earns her an even harder slap to put Charlotte outside as we take a break. Back with Bayley Hulking Up until Charlotte whipping the back of Bayley's head into the bottom rope.
A jawbreaker gets Bayley out of trouble but the neckbreaker into a choke has her right back in said trouble. The Ric Flair kneedrop sets up a dragon sleeper but Bayley climbs the corner to flip out. Another big boot stomps Bayley though and the pace slows right back down. A moonsault off the barricade makes Bayley's neck even worse as Charlotte is beating the heck out of her.
Back inside and it's time for another comeback with some hard chops and the middle rope elbow for two. Bayley goes one step higher with a top rope elbow for two more, followed by a top rope hurricanrana for the same. The fans are WAY into this and it's not hard to see why. Bayley grabs a modified Figure Four but here's Dana Brooke to raek the eyes for the save. Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but here's Sasha to hit Dana with the crutch. Charlotte takes a shot of her own to break it up and the Bayley to Belly gives Bayley the title at 18:03.
A big celebrating ends the show.
Results
Roman Reigns b. Anderson and Gallows via DQ when both attacked Reigns at once
Kofi Kingston b. Bo Dallas SOS
Jack Gallagher b. Noam Dar Running corner dropkick
Braun Strowman b. Mark Henry Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Rusev Helluva Kick
Akira Tozawa b. Ariya Daivari German suplex
Cesaro b. Enzo Amore Pop up uppercut
Bayley b. Charlotte Bayley to Belly
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: February 14, 2017
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Tom Phillips, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield
There's nothing in between us and Wrestlemania XXXIII at this point with Elimination Chamber out of the way. We still have some big TV to knock off first though and that includes one heck of a main event tonight. Bray Wyatt won the Smackdown World Title in the Elimination Chamber on Sunday but tonight he has to defend against former champion John Cena. Let's get to it.
Long recap of Elimination Chamber kicks things off.
Here's Bray with the title to open the show. After getting a chuckle at the YOU DESERVE IT chants, Bray says Sister Abigail told him this would never be easy. But now, after everything he's gone through, he truly does have the whole world in his hands. Bray welcomes us to the era of Wyatt but here's John Cena to interrupt him.
After waiting for the Roman Reigns levels of booing to cut him off, Cena congratulates Bray on becoming the new champion. John says Bray has already brainwashed the fans because they think he deserves it. Around here, you earn things instead of deserving them so now there's a target on Bray's shoulder. Cue AJ Styles to say that he's already beaten Cena over and over so he wants his one on one rematch for the title right now. Bray seems willing but here's Daniel Bryan to interrupt and make it a triple threat.
Dean Ambrose storms into the building wanting to fight Baron Corbin.
American Alpha vs. Ascension
Non-title. Gable wrestles Viktor to the mat to start and everything breaks down a few seconds later. Alpha is sent outside but come back in off the top with a double clothesline (old Steiner Brothers move) to take us to a break. Back with Gable fighting out of a chinlock, only to get kneed in the face for his efforts. There's something to be said about getting hit square in the face to cut someone off.
Chad gets an armbar over the ropes for a breather but Viktor runs around the ring to cut of the tag. Not that it matters as Gable rolls over for the real hot tag. That means it's time for the suplexes but Chad tags himself back in, leaving Jordan to miss a charge into the corner. Something like an H Bomb gets two on Chad but Grand Amplitude wraps up Viktor for the pin at 9:59.
Post match the Usos pop up on screen to say they're coming for the belts. My goodness FIND SOME NEW CHALLENGERS. It feels like they're the only real competition Alpha has had since they debuted.
James Ellsworth is trying to get Carmella to go to dinner when Ambrose comes in. Dean says Carmella is just using him so try online dating. Carmella tells Ellsworth to stand up for her so James kind of does so, only to have Bryan come in and grant Dean a match against Ellsworth for later tonight.
Dean Ambrose vs. James Ellsworth
And never mind as Baron Corbin drags Dean out to the stage. Deep Six into the production area gives us some sparks and Ambrose is out.
We recap Nikki Bella and Natalya fighting backstage at Elimination Chamber, including Bella being knocked into Maryse.
Nikki is in Bryan's office with the boss saying things need to end. Natalya comes in and the arguing begins again. That quickly turns into a fight so Bryan makes it a falls count anywhere match for next week.
Baron says Dean isn't WWE Champion because of him and now Dean is in the hospital because of him. That's everything you need to know.
Dolph Ziggler is tired of people like Apollo Crews and Kalisto trying to take his spot. If he has to wipe out an entire generation to prove his point, so be it.
Mickie James vs. Becky Lynch
Feeling out process to start with Mickie going for the arm but getting reversed so Becky can take over on the mat. Back up and a shove puts Mickie on the floor, followed by an armbar on Mickie to copy Sunday's tactics. They head outside again and it's a double clothesline to take us to a break.
We come back with Mickie grabbing a chinlock before scoring with a flapjack. The Bexploder gets two on Mickie and a forearm puts her on the floor. James comes up holding her shoulder (which didn't seem to actually hit anything in the crash) but of course she's goldbricking, setting up a spinning kick to Becky's jaw for the pin at 11:58.
Here's new Women's Champion Naomi, who says she was hurt at Elimination Chamber. It doesn't matter though because she's coming in to Wrestlemania with this title one way or another. Cue Alexa Bliss to say Naomi is just hiding from the pressure. Naomi could even have her own 30 for 30 special called The Lights Go Out. Bliss is feeling generous though and is giving Naomi a week to get ready for the rematch.
Black History Month video on Nelson Mandela.
TJ Perkins wants us to watch 205 Live.
Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena vs. AJ Styles
Wyatt is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Bray does his entrance and runs into Luke Harper who gives him a pre-match beating. We take a break before the bell and come back with Cena loading up the Shuffle on Styles until Bray pulls him outside. AJ isn't one to be shown up though and hits a big forearm out to the floor.
Back in and a low forearm gets two on Bray but Cena comes back in for the running shoulders to the champ. The AA is countered into a failed Sister Abigail attempt though as Styles comes in with the forearm. Cena plants AJ with the AA for two, followed by Sister Abigail getting the same on Cena with AJ making the save.
Back from a break with AJ slamming Bray onto the announcers' table and dropping a leg to put him through the wood. Cena throws AJ in for another AA but tries a third and gets reversed into the Calf Crusher. That's reversed into the STF but Bray comes back in with the backsplash for the last second save. AJ is sent outside and another AA gets two on the champ. The Styles Clash gets the same on Cena and all three are down. Back up again and AJ is sent outside, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin on Cena at 14:05.
Post match here's Randy Orton for the big staredown. The fans cheer for Orton as Bray says not to listen to it. Orton says he won't fight Bray for the title at Wrestlemania because he pledges loyalty to Wyatt. Bray says that means Orton has the keys to the kingdom and the double pose ends the show.
Results
American Alpha b. Ascension Grand Amplitude to Viktor
Mickie James b. Becky Lynch Spinning kick to the head
Bray Wyatt b. AJ Styles and John Cena Sister Abigail to Cena
Wednesday
NXT
Date: February 15, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson
We've got two big matches for tonight with a title on the line. First up it's the Aussie women Billie Kay and Peyton Royce teaming up to face Liv Morgan and a mystery partner. We'll cap it off with Tyler Bate making his first defense of the WWE UK Title against the debuting Trent Seven. Let's get to it.
Quick look at Bate vs. Seven.
Opening sequence.
Authors of Pain vs. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i
Non-title and Lance is Samu's son. It's total domination with stereo Death Valley Drivers putting the jobbers into the corner. The Final Chapter ends Spears at 1:20.
The jobbers get a Super Collider post match.
Video on Tyler Bate.
Billie Kay/Peyton Royce vs. Liv Morgan/Ember Moon
Kind of an obvious pick. Moon spins away from Billie to start and the Aussie is already looking shaken. Billie is smart enough to twist away and get in a kick to the ribs, only to get tossed down with a suplex. The hot tag brings in Morgan to a very limited reaction (that's hard to do in NXT) for the house cleaning. An STO gets two on Peyton as everything breaks down. Moon gets sent outside and Billie knees Morgan in the side of the head for the pin at 3:18.
We look back at Sanity telling Tye Dillinger that he belongs to the team and then beating him down later in the night. No Way Jose and Roderick Strong made the save.
Strong and Jose don't like bullies and respect Dillinger enough to give him a hand.
Here's DIY with something to say. They realized their dream in Toronto but that dream became a nightmare in San Antonio. They've never fought anyone like the Authors of Pain but they saw doubt in their eyes. No matter how much they're beaten down they'll never quit fighting so it's time for a rematch. Cue Paul Ellering to say the match can take place in two weeks. DIY doesn't want to wait but here's the Revival to beat them down, only to have the Authors chase them off.
Video on Trent Seven.
Video on Kassius Ohno, who returns soon.
General Manager William Regal announces a #1 contenders triple threat match for next week between Peyton Royce, Ember Moon and Liv Morgan.
UK Title: Tyler Bate vs. Trent Seven
Bate is defending. They start slowly with both guys having a clean break and offering a twirl of the others mustache. Bate bounces off the much bigger Seven until Trent runs him over with a much harder version. Nigel starts talking about cricket and gets in a few jabs at Watson (not that difficult) as the slow beating continues while taking us to a break.
Back with Trent getting two off a backslide and Bate giving us that great scared face in the corner. Tyler finally gets going and knocks Trent outside for a good looking dive over the top. Back in and the Seven Stars Lariat is broken up so Tyler grabs the airplane spin. Since it's just an airplane spin though, Trent pops up and gets in a powerbomb for two. A half crab (not a great one though) has Bate in trouble but the hold doesn't last that long.
It's time for rights and left (Bop and Bam if you haven't been formally introduced) but Seven just blasts him with the Seven Star Lariat for two. You know, if it hardly ever finishes anyone, it's not really a finisher. Trent takes his sweet time going up and gets caught in a super exploder suplex for two. Bate gets all fired up and hits the rolling kick to the head, followed by the Tyler Driver '97 for the pin at 15:39.
They shake hands post match.
Results
Authors of Pain b. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i Final Chapter to Spears
Peyton Royce/Billie Kay b. Ember Moon/Liv Morgan Knee to Morgan's head
Tyler Bate b. Trent Seven Tyler Driver '97
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
The big story coming out of last week is the full on split of the Wolves as Davey Richards cost Eddie Edwards his last shot at the TNA World Title. While you can probably guess the reason behind the split, it should be interesting to hear the actual explanation. Other than that we also have the saga of Braxton Sutter and company which seems to be setting up a wedding. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the Expedition of Gold, which will take the Hardys to Tijuana, Mexico this week.
Video on Davey turning on Eddie.
Moose/Brandi Rhodes vs. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary
I know I say it every time she's out but Brandi is a very beautiful woman. Moose is wrestling in a shirt for some reason here. The guys get things going with Steve bouncing off Moose multiple times. Rosemary offers a distraction so Steve can take over, which must last for a good fifteen seconds. Abyss' interference does a bit better and everything breaks down with Decay taking over.
Moose will have none of that and LAUNCHES Steve onto Abyss at ringside. Rosemary jumps onto Moose's back and it's time for Brandi's still awkward chops (yeah they're still awkward but she's only had a few months of ring time and she's clearly trying as hard as she can). A middle rope missile dropkick puts Rosemary down as Pope still tries to get Mini-Moose over as a nickname. The matching pump punches have Decay in trouble and stereo Game Changers are enough for the double pin at 5:43.
Eddie Edwards isn't here to talk because he wants to hurt Davey.
Moose tells Brandi he's there for her whenever she needs. There was no hint of anything romantic in the way he said it.
We look back at the end of last week's show.
Eddie calls out Davey but he gets Angelina Love instead, saying there's no Davey until she says so. Basically Eddie abandoned Davey while he was recovering from knee surgery and forgot about his brother. Love says Eddie can have Davey now and introduces the American Wolf (new nickname) but Eddie cuts her off and says to let go of her husband's balls.
Davey grabs the mic and goes on a rant about how he created the team and the Wolves' Nation. Richards offers him a chance to leave but Eddie goes straight up the aisle to start the brawl. Security breaks it up so Eddie says this isn't over as Davey tries to crawl in the ring. We get a challenge for a street fight later tonight and Davey seems more than game.
Ok....that was great. I was really, REALLY worried about this feud when I first heard about it because their ROH feud was such a disaster but this already fixed the major problem of the ROH version: there's a reason for them to hate each other. The previous one was a bunch of I respect you but I want Dan Severn to train me because this is suddenly an MMA promotion and I have no idea why that's supposed to entertain me. This felt like two guys who wanted to kill each other and they got to the point immediately. I can easily go for something like that.
Mike Bennett has a bachelor party for Braxton Sutter, who is miserable. It's basically a frat party with people all around thirty years old and Sutter wants to leave.
It's off to Tijuana where the Hardys are challenging for the Mexican Tag Team Championships of the World. Matt and Jeff demand to speak to the promoter and yell in Spanish at a luchador who speaks English. Konnan, the promotion's owner, wants to make money off their appearance.
Now we have Laurel Van Ness' bachelorette party with Allie having st up a very sweet room with streamers, balloons and confetti everywhere. Maria yells at her for making it look like a children's party. Allie is devastated when she hears about how it's for Laurel and Braxton's wedding.
Kingston vs. Jesse Godderz
Kingston chops away to start and shrugs off a dropkick by raking the eyes. We hit the choking on the middle rope before Jesse makes his comeback with clotheslines and a Blockbuster for two. An STO puts Jesse down for the same but he nails a quick enziguri. Godderz hits a springboard....I guess we'll say forearm for the pin at 4:11.
The DCC comes out post match but Jesse is smart enough to bail.
The bachelor party continues to be horrible with an overweight man crushing the drug dealer.
Allie tries to liven the party up with noisemakers but Maria yells at her again. Sienna just wants to drink.
Tyrus has taken over Fact of Life and brings out someone who was never his friend: Eli Drake, whose arm is in a sling. Drake can't sit at the desk so the sling comes off in a hurry. Eli yells at Tyrus for making decisions that he didn't approve of and not watching his back like Tyrus is supposed to do. No one owns Tyrus and a match is made for next week.
Back in Tijuana (this show has more scene cuts than a Total Divas episode), Konnan says he can't pay the Hardys but his messenger says they don't want money. The Hardys come in to see Konnan and agree to wrestle for the titles for no pay. Matt: Money is for marks. The Hardys leave and Konnan tells the staff to start making and selling as much bootleg Hardy merchandise as they can.
Maria yells at Allie for the amount of pink at the party. Allie can be a ring bearer next week and gets frosting thrown in her face. The ladies take the gifts (including lingerie) and leave.
We get the match from Tijuana with the Hardys challenging Super Crazy and Psicosis for the Crash Tag Team Titles. While the match is going on, the promotion's women hit on Vanguard I because the women of this promotion aren't all that smart. We only see clips of the match with the Hardys hitting all their signature stuff to win with a Swanton to Crazy. Of note: the referee was blurred out because he works for Lucha Underground, who threatened legal action against TNA if they showed one of their contracted workers.
After the match, the Hardys teleport back to North Carolina before Konnan and company can stop them. Konnan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DISAPPEARED??? Back in North Carolina, the Hardys literally throw the belts into a bag and go off to win the Mid-Atlantic Tag Team Titles next week. Hint: you might not want to show us the celebration after winning the belts.
Video on Brooke returning to TNA and being targeted by the Lady Squad.
Sienna vs. Brooke
Maria offers an early distraction to start and Sienna takes over with forearms and a spinebuster. Brooke gets in some forearms of her own as Madison Rayne explains why Maria is the most amazing Knockout ever. Another Maria distraction lets Sienna get in a running clothesline as Josh talks about how you can get a Louisville Slugger baseball bat signed by Jeff Hardy. Maria chokes on the rope and offers a distraction so Sienna can choke as well. As Maria talks about how the Knockouts show their midsections, Brooke fights off the double teaming and rolls Sienna up for the pin at 5:55.
One of Bennett's friends wants to put in a porn DVD but Bennett says it's time for something special. That would be a stripper who sounds like she's smoked five packs a day. Bennett slams the door in her face and asks where the DVD went.
Eli Drake commandeers a camera and promises to give Tyrus a beating next week. As usual, this is one of the best things on the show.
Here's Lashley for a chat. Lashley says it doesn't matter if it's wrestling or MMA because no one can hang with him. This brings out UFC fighter (currently facing a potential suspension for steroids) and professional wrestler Josh Barnett to give him a lecture about respecting the title. Lashley says this is his ring but has to escape an armbar. A challenge is issued but Barnett wants the title on the line. Bobby says he'll fight anywhere anytime and the challenge is accepted for some point in the future. I get the idea they're going for here but Barnett was really, really awkward on the mic.
Everyone has passed out at the bachelor party but Braxton is sitting there twirling his thumbs. He slowly gets up and puts the stripper on Mike's lap for a quick picture. He then calls Maria and leaves the phone on the two of them before leaving.
Eddie Edwards vs. Davey Richards
Street fight with a full hour and a half of build. Angelina does Davey's entrance, allowing him to jump Eddie from behind. There are weapons ready at ringside and Davey keeps beating him down as we take an early break. Back with Davey crushing Eddie's hand with a chair but Edwards fights back anyway. Eddie and Angelina both have chairs but the distraction lets Davey swing a chair into Eddie's for a knockdown.
Cue Eddie's wife Alisha...who gets dropped with a single forearm. Angelina handcuffs her to the ropes but Eddie covers her up and takes the chair shots for her. Davey unloads on him with the chair while Angelina makes Alisha watch. There's no referee as Eddie gets a Conchairto so Angelina counts the pin for a no contest at around 13:30.
A promo for next week's Expedition of Gold wraps us up.
Results
Brandi/Moose b. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary Double Game Changers
Jesse Godderz b. Kingston STO
Brooke b. Sienna Rollup
Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards went to a no contest
Friday
George Steele passed away at age 79.
Saturday
Ivan Koloff passed away at age 74.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Roman Reigns b. Anderson and Gallows via DQ when both attacked Reigns at once
Kofi Kingston b. Bo Dallas SOS
Jack Gallagher b. Noam Dar Running corner dropkick
Braun Strowman b. Mark Henry Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Rusev Helluva Kick
Akira Tozawa b. Ariya Daivari German suplex
Cesaro b. Enzo Amore Pop up uppercut
Bayley b. Charlotte Bayley to Belly
Smackdown
American Alpha b. Ascension Grand Amplitude to Viktor
Mickie James b. Becky Lynch Spinning kick to the head
Bray Wyatt b. AJ Styles and John Cena Sister Abigail to Cena
NXT
Authors of Pain b. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i Final Chapter to Spears
Peyton Royce/Billie Kay b. Ember Moon/Liv Morgan Knee to Morgan's head
Tyler Bate b. Trent Seven Tyler Driver '97
Impact Wrestling
Brandi/Moose b. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary Double Game Changers
Jesse Godderz b. Kingston STO
Brooke b. Sienna Rollup
Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards went to a no contest
Teddy Long is official for the WWE Hall of Fame.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 2017
Location: T-Mobile Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves
It's a pretty stacked show this week as Bayley gets a shot at Charlotte's Raw Women's Title, Emmalina (allegedly) debuts and Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens have a Festival of Friendship. We're getting closer to Fastlane and it's time to really start setting up the pay per view card. Let's get to it.
This show is dedicated to Chavo Guerrero Sr. It's always nice to see them do something like that, even if it's something minor.
Opening sequence.
Here's a dancing Stephanie (so she's good this week) to welcome us to the show. She's given Mick Foley the night off tonight and hopes he'll have his head on straight next week. Stephanie is in charge this week though but here's Roman Reigns to cut her off. Reigns wants to fight Braun Strowman right here tonight and the fans seem to agree. Stephanie doesn't though and threatens Reigns with the loss of his match against Strowman if he does anything tonight.
Anderson and Gallows of all people interrupt and say they're tired of hearing Stephanie disrespected like this. That means a handicap match tonight with Stephanie doing a bad Teddy Long impression to set it up. Anderson and Gallows get punched in the face to start it off.
Anderson and Gallows vs. Roman Reigns
This is joined in progress after a break with Reigns and Gallows slugging it out. The champs quickly take over and Anderson grabs a chinlock to fill in some time. Reigns fights up and starts throwing bombs, only to get caught by a cheap shot from the apron. Anderson and Gallows start stomping away and that's a DQ at 3:09.
Reigns clears the champs off without too much trouble.
Quick video on the history of the List of Jericho.
Kofi Kingston vs. Bo Dallas
Before the match, Kofi asks if Dallas is trying to be a Social Outcast. Big E. on the other hand has a folder labeled Ice Cream Blueprints because New Day is making an ice cream machine. That starts a WE WANT ICE CREAM chant as Kofi dropkicks Dallas to the floor. Dallas gets into the dancing and RIPS UP THE FOLDER. New Day is aghast so Kofi hits a huge flip dive to take him down. Bo gets two off an elevated swinging neckbreaker but gets caught in the SOS for the pin at 2:13.
Dallas is covered in cereal after the match.
Neville is ready for a match tomorrow night when Jack Gallagher comes in. Jack starts to quote some Shakespeare but Neville cuts him off for not being a man. We'll find that out at Fastlane but for now, Jack calls him a pillock.
Video on Jericho helping Owens retain the title over Seth Rollins.
Noam Dar vs. Jack Gallagher
Alicia Fox is in Dar's corner and Graves thinks she's staring at Gallagher. Dar can't keep Jack in a leglock as we get some snappy British spinning for an escape. A hard kick to the knee softens the knee up a bit better but Dar switches over to the arm. Gallagher doesn't care for the switch in psychology so it's the headbutt into the running dropkick for the pin on Noam at 3:15.
Neville comes out for the staredown.
HHH and Samoa Joe arrive.
Here's Emmalina in a rather shiny dress. She talks about the wait and says she's finally here. Now we'll see the makeover from Emmalina to Emma....and that's it. She was on screen for less than a minute.
Bayley is in the same place where Lita won her first Women's Title from Stephanie McMahon, who doesn't think anything of her. Tonight though, Bayley is hitting the jackpot.
Jericho and Owens are getting ready when HHH comes in to take Owens away.
Mark Henry vs. Braun Strowman
They do the big power lockup to start and neither goes anywhere. The referee backs Henry up so Strowman gets in a cheap shot to take over. Strowman drops a leg and grabs a chinlock to keep thing slow. The forearm to the chest is broken up but Henry can't hit the World's Strongest Slam. Braun actually hits a dropkick followed by the powerslam for the pin at 3:53.
Post match Reigns comes out for the fight and knocks Strowman down with two Superman Punches. The spear is countered into the powerslam though and Reigns is laid out.
We look at Jericho helping Owens against Reigns.
Cesaro and Sheamus are firing Bayley up when Enzo and Big Cass come in. Trash is talked and it seems that we'll be seeing Cass vs. Cesaro later.
Michael Cole has a sitdown interview with Samoa Joe, who says he's working for HHH, who gave him his first shot at the big time. HHH has given more people opportunities than anyone else and Joe has spent eighteen years mowing everyone down to get here. Joe doesn't want to hear about HHH any more because this interview is about him. He's not some guy like Sami Zayn who is just happy to be here. Cole brings up all the people HHH has given opportunities to and then turned on them (including Shawn Michaels) but Joe says that's not happening because he doesn't need HHH. The Destroyer has been unleashed.
WOW this was great. Joe looked like one of the most natural stars ever here and a lot of that is likely because that's the Samoa Joe character who has been around for a long time. I could go for Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn (assuming Zayn isn't facing Jericho again) and as soon as Joe can strike out on his own and not be another HHH project, he'll be in the main event in about five seconds. Finally: BAHAHAHAHAHA TNA SCREWS UP AGAIN!!! They had this guy and decided that he needed to put over Sting instead of keeping the World Title. That's freaking hilarious.
Sami Zayn vs. Rusev
Sami backs away from a kick to the head to start but gets taken to the mat. The fans want Lana but have to settle for Sami fighting out of a headlock and chopping away. Sami knocks him outside for the big flip dive but Rusev just blasts him with a kick to the head to take us to a break. Back with Rusev grabbing a bearhug and throwing Sami off a fall away slam. Sami finally avoids a charge in the corner and they head outside, only to have Rusev blast him with a clothesline. As they get back in though, Sami scores with the Helluva Kick, his only major move of the match, for the pin at 11:00.
Post match Sami says he never gives up or sells out like Samoa Joe, so here's Joe to jump him. The beating begins and Sami gets choked out.
Teddy Long Hall of Fame video.
Ariya Daivari vs. Akira Tozawa
Brian Kendrick is on commentary and takes credit for the indy movement in WWE. They slug it out to start with Daivari looking freaked out by Tozawa's shouting. A kick to the chest and a backsplash get two but Tozawa misses a charge into the corner. Daivari drops a knee and grabs a sleeper. That goes nowhere so some fast kicks (with fast camera cuts) drop Daivari setting up the snap German suplex to give Tozawa the pin at 3:11.
Jericho introduces the Festival of Friendship and that means a bunch of showgirls coming out to welcome him to the ring. Jericho is in a shiny hat and jacket but Owens looks downright confused. There's a bunch of covered stuff set up in the ring and Jericho promises a bunch of gifts.
First up: a sculpture of what looks like two people intertwined. Owens: What is it? Apparently it cost $7,000 and while Owens wants to call it stupid, he calls it a steal. Next is a painting of Jericho and Owens' fingers touching ala the Michaelangelo painting. Jericho thinks it belongs over Owens' mantle. Owens: Chris I have two kids and you're not wearing pants! Jericho: It's art! You don't need pants!
Finally, Jericho has a magician named Friendship who does some basic tricks (I'm a sucker for magic so this is the highlight so far). Owens says he has a nine year old son with a magic kit and he can do the same trick. Jericho agrees on the bad performance so Friendship the Magician JUST MADE THE LIST! After admitting that he found the magician on Craigslist, Jericho says this is just the beginning.
The real present is calling out Goldberg, who is going to get......we go to and come back from a commercial break......IT! We get the music but it's Gillberg, who Owens promptly destroys. He's not happy though and wants to know what Jericho is thinking. Jericho says he did this for his best friend and promises that Owens will retain the title at Fastlane.
Owens smiles and says he has a gift for Jericho too. It's a NEW LIST....but Jericho's name is on it! Jericho pulls it out of the box and it's the LIST OF KO! Owens jumps Jericho and destroys him with the apron powerbomb. Jericho is sent into a big sign in the ring, leaving Owens to be showered in boos.
This was EXCELLENT and you could tell the crowd completely bought into the whole thing. The key here is simple: Jericho was doing something nice for his friend and Owens turned on him anyway. It makes Owens out to be a jerk while Jericho was a nice guy who was on the wrong side. That creates sympathy for Jericho and will make his face turn feel much more natural. Of course a lot of the heat goes away if Goldberg takes the title (though Jericho costing Owens would be nice) but Lesnar vs. Goldberg just couldn't get over on its own.
A bloody Jericho is stretchered out.
Cesaro vs. Enzo Amore
Before Cesaro comes out, Enzo accuses him of being a James Bond villain. Cesaro uppercuts the heck out of him to start and there's the gutwrench suplex. Back in and Enzo grabs the middle rope DDT, only to eat Swiss Death for the pin at 2:43.
Black History Month video on Rosa Parks.
Charlotte yells at Sasha Banks for being injured.
Women's Title: Bayley vs. Charlotte
Charlotte is defending and they start slowly here with the champ working on the arm. Bayley does the same with some armdrags but Charlotte slaps her in the face. That just earns her an even harder slap to put Charlotte outside as we take a break. Back with Bayley Hulking Up until Charlotte whipping the back of Bayley's head into the bottom rope.
A jawbreaker gets Bayley out of trouble but the neckbreaker into a choke has her right back in said trouble. The Ric Flair kneedrop sets up a dragon sleeper but Bayley climbs the corner to flip out. Another big boot stomps Bayley though and the pace slows right back down. A moonsault off the barricade makes Bayley's neck even worse as Charlotte is beating the heck out of her.
Back inside and it's time for another comeback with some hard chops and the middle rope elbow for two. Bayley goes one step higher with a top rope elbow for two more, followed by a top rope hurricanrana for the same. The fans are WAY into this and it's not hard to see why. Bayley grabs a modified Figure Four but here's Dana Brooke to raek the eyes for the save. Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but here's Sasha to hit Dana with the crutch. Charlotte takes a shot of her own to break it up and the Bayley to Belly gives Bayley the title at 18:03.
A big celebrating ends the show.
Results
Roman Reigns b. Anderson and Gallows via DQ when both attacked Reigns at once
Kofi Kingston b. Bo Dallas SOS
Jack Gallagher b. Noam Dar Running corner dropkick
Braun Strowman b. Mark Henry Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Rusev Helluva Kick
Akira Tozawa b. Ariya Daivari German suplex
Cesaro b. Enzo Amore Pop up uppercut
Bayley b. Charlotte Bayley to Belly
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: February 14, 2017
Location: Honda Center, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Tom Phillips, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield
There's nothing in between us and Wrestlemania XXXIII at this point with Elimination Chamber out of the way. We still have some big TV to knock off first though and that includes one heck of a main event tonight. Bray Wyatt won the Smackdown World Title in the Elimination Chamber on Sunday but tonight he has to defend against former champion John Cena. Let's get to it.
Long recap of Elimination Chamber kicks things off.
Here's Bray with the title to open the show. After getting a chuckle at the YOU DESERVE IT chants, Bray says Sister Abigail told him this would never be easy. But now, after everything he's gone through, he truly does have the whole world in his hands. Bray welcomes us to the era of Wyatt but here's John Cena to interrupt him.
After waiting for the Roman Reigns levels of booing to cut him off, Cena congratulates Bray on becoming the new champion. John says Bray has already brainwashed the fans because they think he deserves it. Around here, you earn things instead of deserving them so now there's a target on Bray's shoulder. Cue AJ Styles to say that he's already beaten Cena over and over so he wants his one on one rematch for the title right now. Bray seems willing but here's Daniel Bryan to interrupt and make it a triple threat.
Dean Ambrose storms into the building wanting to fight Baron Corbin.
American Alpha vs. Ascension
Non-title. Gable wrestles Viktor to the mat to start and everything breaks down a few seconds later. Alpha is sent outside but come back in off the top with a double clothesline (old Steiner Brothers move) to take us to a break. Back with Gable fighting out of a chinlock, only to get kneed in the face for his efforts. There's something to be said about getting hit square in the face to cut someone off.
Chad gets an armbar over the ropes for a breather but Viktor runs around the ring to cut of the tag. Not that it matters as Gable rolls over for the real hot tag. That means it's time for the suplexes but Chad tags himself back in, leaving Jordan to miss a charge into the corner. Something like an H Bomb gets two on Chad but Grand Amplitude wraps up Viktor for the pin at 9:59.
Post match the Usos pop up on screen to say they're coming for the belts. My goodness FIND SOME NEW CHALLENGERS. It feels like they're the only real competition Alpha has had since they debuted.
James Ellsworth is trying to get Carmella to go to dinner when Ambrose comes in. Dean says Carmella is just using him so try online dating. Carmella tells Ellsworth to stand up for her so James kind of does so, only to have Bryan come in and grant Dean a match against Ellsworth for later tonight.
Dean Ambrose vs. James Ellsworth
And never mind as Baron Corbin drags Dean out to the stage. Deep Six into the production area gives us some sparks and Ambrose is out.
We recap Nikki Bella and Natalya fighting backstage at Elimination Chamber, including Bella being knocked into Maryse.
Nikki is in Bryan's office with the boss saying things need to end. Natalya comes in and the arguing begins again. That quickly turns into a fight so Bryan makes it a falls count anywhere match for next week.
Baron says Dean isn't WWE Champion because of him and now Dean is in the hospital because of him. That's everything you need to know.
Dolph Ziggler is tired of people like Apollo Crews and Kalisto trying to take his spot. If he has to wipe out an entire generation to prove his point, so be it.
Mickie James vs. Becky Lynch
Feeling out process to start with Mickie going for the arm but getting reversed so Becky can take over on the mat. Back up and a shove puts Mickie on the floor, followed by an armbar on Mickie to copy Sunday's tactics. They head outside again and it's a double clothesline to take us to a break.
We come back with Mickie grabbing a chinlock before scoring with a flapjack. The Bexploder gets two on Mickie and a forearm puts her on the floor. James comes up holding her shoulder (which didn't seem to actually hit anything in the crash) but of course she's goldbricking, setting up a spinning kick to Becky's jaw for the pin at 11:58.
Here's new Women's Champion Naomi, who says she was hurt at Elimination Chamber. It doesn't matter though because she's coming in to Wrestlemania with this title one way or another. Cue Alexa Bliss to say Naomi is just hiding from the pressure. Naomi could even have her own 30 for 30 special called The Lights Go Out. Bliss is feeling generous though and is giving Naomi a week to get ready for the rematch.
Black History Month video on Nelson Mandela.
TJ Perkins wants us to watch 205 Live.
Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena vs. AJ Styles
Wyatt is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Bray does his entrance and runs into Luke Harper who gives him a pre-match beating. We take a break before the bell and come back with Cena loading up the Shuffle on Styles until Bray pulls him outside. AJ isn't one to be shown up though and hits a big forearm out to the floor.
Back in and a low forearm gets two on Bray but Cena comes back in for the running shoulders to the champ. The AA is countered into a failed Sister Abigail attempt though as Styles comes in with the forearm. Cena plants AJ with the AA for two, followed by Sister Abigail getting the same on Cena with AJ making the save.
Back from a break with AJ slamming Bray onto the announcers' table and dropping a leg to put him through the wood. Cena throws AJ in for another AA but tries a third and gets reversed into the Calf Crusher. That's reversed into the STF but Bray comes back in with the backsplash for the last second save. AJ is sent outside and another AA gets two on the champ. The Styles Clash gets the same on Cena and all three are down. Back up again and AJ is sent outside, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin on Cena at 14:05.
Post match here's Randy Orton for the big staredown. The fans cheer for Orton as Bray says not to listen to it. Orton says he won't fight Bray for the title at Wrestlemania because he pledges loyalty to Wyatt. Bray says that means Orton has the keys to the kingdom and the double pose ends the show.
Results
American Alpha b. Ascension Grand Amplitude to Viktor
Mickie James b. Becky Lynch Spinning kick to the head
Bray Wyatt b. AJ Styles and John Cena Sister Abigail to Cena
Wednesday
NXT
Date: February 15, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson
We've got two big matches for tonight with a title on the line. First up it's the Aussie women Billie Kay and Peyton Royce teaming up to face Liv Morgan and a mystery partner. We'll cap it off with Tyler Bate making his first defense of the WWE UK Title against the debuting Trent Seven. Let's get to it.
Quick look at Bate vs. Seven.
Opening sequence.
Authors of Pain vs. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i
Non-title and Lance is Samu's son. It's total domination with stereo Death Valley Drivers putting the jobbers into the corner. The Final Chapter ends Spears at 1:20.
The jobbers get a Super Collider post match.
Video on Tyler Bate.
Billie Kay/Peyton Royce vs. Liv Morgan/Ember Moon
Kind of an obvious pick. Moon spins away from Billie to start and the Aussie is already looking shaken. Billie is smart enough to twist away and get in a kick to the ribs, only to get tossed down with a suplex. The hot tag brings in Morgan to a very limited reaction (that's hard to do in NXT) for the house cleaning. An STO gets two on Peyton as everything breaks down. Moon gets sent outside and Billie knees Morgan in the side of the head for the pin at 3:18.
We look back at Sanity telling Tye Dillinger that he belongs to the team and then beating him down later in the night. No Way Jose and Roderick Strong made the save.
Strong and Jose don't like bullies and respect Dillinger enough to give him a hand.
Here's DIY with something to say. They realized their dream in Toronto but that dream became a nightmare in San Antonio. They've never fought anyone like the Authors of Pain but they saw doubt in their eyes. No matter how much they're beaten down they'll never quit fighting so it's time for a rematch. Cue Paul Ellering to say the match can take place in two weeks. DIY doesn't want to wait but here's the Revival to beat them down, only to have the Authors chase them off.
Video on Trent Seven.
Video on Kassius Ohno, who returns soon.
General Manager William Regal announces a #1 contenders triple threat match for next week between Peyton Royce, Ember Moon and Liv Morgan.
UK Title: Tyler Bate vs. Trent Seven
Bate is defending. They start slowly with both guys having a clean break and offering a twirl of the others mustache. Bate bounces off the much bigger Seven until Trent runs him over with a much harder version. Nigel starts talking about cricket and gets in a few jabs at Watson (not that difficult) as the slow beating continues while taking us to a break.
Back with Trent getting two off a backslide and Bate giving us that great scared face in the corner. Tyler finally gets going and knocks Trent outside for a good looking dive over the top. Back in and the Seven Stars Lariat is broken up so Tyler grabs the airplane spin. Since it's just an airplane spin though, Trent pops up and gets in a powerbomb for two. A half crab (not a great one though) has Bate in trouble but the hold doesn't last that long.
It's time for rights and left (Bop and Bam if you haven't been formally introduced) but Seven just blasts him with the Seven Star Lariat for two. You know, if it hardly ever finishes anyone, it's not really a finisher. Trent takes his sweet time going up and gets caught in a super exploder suplex for two. Bate gets all fired up and hits the rolling kick to the head, followed by the Tyler Driver '97 for the pin at 15:39.
They shake hands post match.
Results
Authors of Pain b. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i Final Chapter to Spears
Peyton Royce/Billie Kay b. Ember Moon/Liv Morgan Knee to Morgan's head
Tyler Bate b. Trent Seven Tyler Driver '97
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
The big story coming out of last week is the full on split of the Wolves as Davey Richards cost Eddie Edwards his last shot at the TNA World Title. While you can probably guess the reason behind the split, it should be interesting to hear the actual explanation. Other than that we also have the saga of Braxton Sutter and company which seems to be setting up a wedding. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the Expedition of Gold, which will take the Hardys to Tijuana, Mexico this week.
Video on Davey turning on Eddie.
Moose/Brandi Rhodes vs. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary
I know I say it every time she's out but Brandi is a very beautiful woman. Moose is wrestling in a shirt for some reason here. The guys get things going with Steve bouncing off Moose multiple times. Rosemary offers a distraction so Steve can take over, which must last for a good fifteen seconds. Abyss' interference does a bit better and everything breaks down with Decay taking over.
Moose will have none of that and LAUNCHES Steve onto Abyss at ringside. Rosemary jumps onto Moose's back and it's time for Brandi's still awkward chops (yeah they're still awkward but she's only had a few months of ring time and she's clearly trying as hard as she can). A middle rope missile dropkick puts Rosemary down as Pope still tries to get Mini-Moose over as a nickname. The matching pump punches have Decay in trouble and stereo Game Changers are enough for the double pin at 5:43.
Eddie Edwards isn't here to talk because he wants to hurt Davey.
Moose tells Brandi he's there for her whenever she needs. There was no hint of anything romantic in the way he said it.
We look back at the end of last week's show.
Eddie calls out Davey but he gets Angelina Love instead, saying there's no Davey until she says so. Basically Eddie abandoned Davey while he was recovering from knee surgery and forgot about his brother. Love says Eddie can have Davey now and introduces the American Wolf (new nickname) but Eddie cuts her off and says to let go of her husband's balls.
Davey grabs the mic and goes on a rant about how he created the team and the Wolves' Nation. Richards offers him a chance to leave but Eddie goes straight up the aisle to start the brawl. Security breaks it up so Eddie says this isn't over as Davey tries to crawl in the ring. We get a challenge for a street fight later tonight and Davey seems more than game.
Ok....that was great. I was really, REALLY worried about this feud when I first heard about it because their ROH feud was such a disaster but this already fixed the major problem of the ROH version: there's a reason for them to hate each other. The previous one was a bunch of I respect you but I want Dan Severn to train me because this is suddenly an MMA promotion and I have no idea why that's supposed to entertain me. This felt like two guys who wanted to kill each other and they got to the point immediately. I can easily go for something like that.
Mike Bennett has a bachelor party for Braxton Sutter, who is miserable. It's basically a frat party with people all around thirty years old and Sutter wants to leave.
It's off to Tijuana where the Hardys are challenging for the Mexican Tag Team Championships of the World. Matt and Jeff demand to speak to the promoter and yell in Spanish at a luchador who speaks English. Konnan, the promotion's owner, wants to make money off their appearance.
Now we have Laurel Van Ness' bachelorette party with Allie having st up a very sweet room with streamers, balloons and confetti everywhere. Maria yells at her for making it look like a children's party. Allie is devastated when she hears about how it's for Laurel and Braxton's wedding.
Kingston vs. Jesse Godderz
Kingston chops away to start and shrugs off a dropkick by raking the eyes. We hit the choking on the middle rope before Jesse makes his comeback with clotheslines and a Blockbuster for two. An STO puts Jesse down for the same but he nails a quick enziguri. Godderz hits a springboard....I guess we'll say forearm for the pin at 4:11.
The DCC comes out post match but Jesse is smart enough to bail.
The bachelor party continues to be horrible with an overweight man crushing the drug dealer.
Allie tries to liven the party up with noisemakers but Maria yells at her again. Sienna just wants to drink.
Tyrus has taken over Fact of Life and brings out someone who was never his friend: Eli Drake, whose arm is in a sling. Drake can't sit at the desk so the sling comes off in a hurry. Eli yells at Tyrus for making decisions that he didn't approve of and not watching his back like Tyrus is supposed to do. No one owns Tyrus and a match is made for next week.
Back in Tijuana (this show has more scene cuts than a Total Divas episode), Konnan says he can't pay the Hardys but his messenger says they don't want money. The Hardys come in to see Konnan and agree to wrestle for the titles for no pay. Matt: Money is for marks. The Hardys leave and Konnan tells the staff to start making and selling as much bootleg Hardy merchandise as they can.
Maria yells at Allie for the amount of pink at the party. Allie can be a ring bearer next week and gets frosting thrown in her face. The ladies take the gifts (including lingerie) and leave.
We get the match from Tijuana with the Hardys challenging Super Crazy and Psicosis for the Crash Tag Team Titles. While the match is going on, the promotion's women hit on Vanguard I because the women of this promotion aren't all that smart. We only see clips of the match with the Hardys hitting all their signature stuff to win with a Swanton to Crazy. Of note: the referee was blurred out because he works for Lucha Underground, who threatened legal action against TNA if they showed one of their contracted workers.
After the match, the Hardys teleport back to North Carolina before Konnan and company can stop them. Konnan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DISAPPEARED??? Back in North Carolina, the Hardys literally throw the belts into a bag and go off to win the Mid-Atlantic Tag Team Titles next week. Hint: you might not want to show us the celebration after winning the belts.
Video on Brooke returning to TNA and being targeted by the Lady Squad.
Sienna vs. Brooke
Maria offers an early distraction to start and Sienna takes over with forearms and a spinebuster. Brooke gets in some forearms of her own as Madison Rayne explains why Maria is the most amazing Knockout ever. Another Maria distraction lets Sienna get in a running clothesline as Josh talks about how you can get a Louisville Slugger baseball bat signed by Jeff Hardy. Maria chokes on the rope and offers a distraction so Sienna can choke as well. As Maria talks about how the Knockouts show their midsections, Brooke fights off the double teaming and rolls Sienna up for the pin at 5:55.
One of Bennett's friends wants to put in a porn DVD but Bennett says it's time for something special. That would be a stripper who sounds like she's smoked five packs a day. Bennett slams the door in her face and asks where the DVD went.
Eli Drake commandeers a camera and promises to give Tyrus a beating next week. As usual, this is one of the best things on the show.
Here's Lashley for a chat. Lashley says it doesn't matter if it's wrestling or MMA because no one can hang with him. This brings out UFC fighter (currently facing a potential suspension for steroids) and professional wrestler Josh Barnett to give him a lecture about respecting the title. Lashley says this is his ring but has to escape an armbar. A challenge is issued but Barnett wants the title on the line. Bobby says he'll fight anywhere anytime and the challenge is accepted for some point in the future. I get the idea they're going for here but Barnett was really, really awkward on the mic.
Everyone has passed out at the bachelor party but Braxton is sitting there twirling his thumbs. He slowly gets up and puts the stripper on Mike's lap for a quick picture. He then calls Maria and leaves the phone on the two of them before leaving.
Eddie Edwards vs. Davey Richards
Street fight with a full hour and a half of build. Angelina does Davey's entrance, allowing him to jump Eddie from behind. There are weapons ready at ringside and Davey keeps beating him down as we take an early break. Back with Davey crushing Eddie's hand with a chair but Edwards fights back anyway. Eddie and Angelina both have chairs but the distraction lets Davey swing a chair into Eddie's for a knockdown.
Cue Eddie's wife Alisha...who gets dropped with a single forearm. Angelina handcuffs her to the ropes but Eddie covers her up and takes the chair shots for her. Davey unloads on him with the chair while Angelina makes Alisha watch. There's no referee as Eddie gets a Conchairto so Angelina counts the pin for a no contest at around 13:30.
A promo for next week's Expedition of Gold wraps us up.
Results
Brandi/Moose b. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary Double Game Changers
Jesse Godderz b. Kingston STO
Brooke b. Sienna Rollup
Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards went to a no contest
Friday
George Steele passed away at age 79.
Saturday
Ivan Koloff passed away at age 74.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Roman Reigns b. Anderson and Gallows via DQ when both attacked Reigns at once
Kofi Kingston b. Bo Dallas SOS
Jack Gallagher b. Noam Dar Running corner dropkick
Braun Strowman b. Mark Henry Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Rusev Helluva Kick
Akira Tozawa b. Ariya Daivari German suplex
Cesaro b. Enzo Amore Pop up uppercut
Bayley b. Charlotte Bayley to Belly
Smackdown
American Alpha b. Ascension Grand Amplitude to Viktor
Mickie James b. Becky Lynch Spinning kick to the head
Bray Wyatt b. AJ Styles and John Cena Sister Abigail to Cena
NXT
Authors of Pain b. Garrison Spears/Lance Anoa'i Final Chapter to Spears
Peyton Royce/Billie Kay b. Ember Moon/Liv Morgan Knee to Morgan's head
Tyler Bate b. Trent Seven Tyler Driver '97
Impact Wrestling
Brandi/Moose b. Crazzy Steve/Rosemary Double Game Changers
Jesse Godderz b. Kingston STO
Brooke b. Sienna Rollup
Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards went to a no contest