klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Diamond Dallas Page is official for the Hall of Fame.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 20, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
It's a big show this week with a ton of things to get to. First of all, Brock Lesnar is scheduled to be in the house and that's huge in general. Second, Bayley has been told to either give her title back to Charlotte or else, which could mean multiple things. Oh and Rock might be in town. Let's get to it.
In Memory of George Steele. Not Ivan Koloff for some reason.
We open with a long recap of the Festival of Friendship and Kevin Owens turning on Chris Jericho. Sweet popcorn baked into a pie that was an amazing segment.
Owens is sitting in the ring in the dark in a chair to get things going. When he was growing up, if anyone had told him he would be defending the World Title against Goldberg in the main event of a pay per view, he would have thought you were crazy. Of course he'd be in the main event of a pay per view, but against Goldberg? The Goldberg chants start up and Owens thinks that's exactly what he wanted to hear.
That's the chant that makes Goldberg think he's invincible as they head into their match at Fastlane. At the pay per view, all Owens has to do is outlast and outsmart Goldberg because the longer a Goldberg match goes, the weaker and weaker he gets. Owens is the master of outsmarting opponents and no one knows how to play the game like him.
Goldberg can say Owens is next all he wants but as far as Owens is concerned, Goldberg is nothing. As for what happened last week with Jericho....Owens drops the mic and walks out. This is the Owens that we've been waiting to see on the main roster for a long time and that's nothing but good as we head into the final stretch to Wrestlemania. Owens was great here and that's awesome to see.
Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass
The winners get a title shot at Fastlane. Cass slugs it out with Cesaro to start before it's off to Enzo, who is launched at Sheamus in the corner. Back from an early break with Enzo in trouble but backdropping Cesaro out to the floor. Sheamus gives chase though and Cesaro just blasts Amore with an uppercut to break up the hot tag attempt (Cue crowd reaction shot!). Cass comes in a few seconds later and everything breaks down. The corkscrew uppercut drops Cass but Enzo breaks up the swing. The East River Crossing ends Cesaro at 9:17.
Post match Enzo runs his mouth and gets Brogue Kicked. That doesn't feel exactly like a heel turn.
Owens is leaving when Mick Foley comes in to say he has a match with Sami Zayn tonight. Kevin chuckles and says he thought Foley liked Sami.
Video on Braun Strowman.
Video on Bayley winning the Women's Title and fulfilling her lifelong dream. This sounds like the setup for a cruiserweight match.
Roman Reigns interrupts Foley and wants to fight Strowman tonight. Foley says that can't happen but here are Anderson and Gallows to interrupt. They want to fight Reigns again tonight and Foley agrees if Roman can find a partner.
Brian Kendrick vs. Akira Tozawa
I would have expected a bit longer build to this one. Tozawa won't shake hands so Kendrick hits him before the bell, including sending him neck/ear first into the turnbuckle hook. The Captain's Hook knocks Tozawa out and there's no match.
In the back, Kendrick says he won't be disrespected like that.
Roman Reigns/??? vs. Anderson and Gallows
Non-title and Reigns' partner is......not here as this is just going to be a handicap match. Anderson starts for the team but Roman drops them both to control early on. Gallows kicks him in the face though and it's already off to the chinlock. The Boot of Doom is broken up and it turns into a double beating on the floor. A chair is brought in but Reigns takes it away and beats the champs down for the DQ at 3:57.
Post match Reigns Superman Punches Gallows and spears Anderson out of the air, sending the champs crawling away.
Video on New Day being announced as the hosts of Wrestlemania.
New Day vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal
Reigns couldn't have beaten up Rusev and Mahal? Before the match, New Day says they're working on a bunch of things right now, including being the hosts of Wrestlemania and trying to become the voices of the hyenas in the new Lion King movie (Kofi: “That's not a joke.”
.
On top of that, they've got the ice cream machine plans back and THEY'VE DIGITIZED THEM! Lana holds up a tablet and says she has the plans....which seem to be authentic. Apparently they include a flux capacitor, three unicorn hairs and New Day starts panicking. Woods: “HOW DID SHE GET THE PLANS?” Big E.: “You know she's Russian right?”
The match is joined in progress with Rusev grabbing a bearhug on Kofi. It's quickly off to Jinder, who can't do a thing due to high levels of being Jinder Mahal. Big E. comes in and cleans house, including putting Rusev on the floor for a big dive. This lets Woods take the tablet back and completely destroy it for a big pop. The Midnight Hour puts Jinder away at 3:42.
Video on George Steele.
Austin Aries is in the ring for the contract signing between Neville and Jack Gallagher. Since Gallagher is present, there are already cookies and tea prepared. Gallagher quickly signs before Neville can even come out. Neville does the same and immediately goes to leave, only to be stopped by Gallagher.
Neville mocks all of the British stereotypes and calls Gallagher a caricature. The real streets of England look like Neville but Gallagher is what the WWE Universe wanted Neville to be. Gallagher assures him that he is NOT a joke because this is the real thing. The table, including the tea is turned over and the fight is on with the headbutt sending Neville outside. Gallagher is one of my favorites at the moment but if they don't do Neville vs. Aries for the title at Wrestlemania, they've lost their minds.
Nia Jax vs. Sara Pierce
Splash and Samoan drop finish Pierce at 34 seconds.
Post match Nia says she's putting Bayley and the title on notice.
Black History Month video on Barack Obama.
Here's Bayley for her first appearance as Women's Champion. She grew up here in California and had a dream of being a champion and getting to point at a Wrestlemania sign. When she was a kid, her dad brought her to the events and bought her all the shirts and toys. Last week, the first thing she did was call her dad and it's a call she'll never forget. Bayley's dad is here tonight and the fans are making her look cool in front of her dad.
Cue Stephanie McMahon to ask if Bayley's dream included everyone wondering if she could have done it without Sasha Banks. Stephanie's daughters look up to her and she wants to know if Bayley is going to throw everything away for the sake of a championship that she didn't earn. Bayley is about to hand it over when Sasha Banks comes out to say don't do it. She thinks about it but says no way is she handing the title over. Bayley won the title because of the WWE Universe. The title belongs to all of them and she'll defend it any time any place.
Cue Charlotte to say she's cashing in her rematch at Fastlane. Sasha cuts her off and says Bayley will keep the title at the pay per view. As for tonight though, Sasha's knee is feeling fine so let's have a trip down memory lane. Stephanie makes the match right now because of course she gets to have the last word.
Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte
Bayley is on commentary. Joined in progress again with Sasha grabbing a headscissors but getting her face driven into the match. Charlotte does the Figure Four faceplants and grabs a necklock. Sasha is sent outside and we take a break. Back with Charlotte grabbing a dragon sleeper. Sasha fights out and makes her comeback, including a dropkick in the corner. Cue Dana Brooke for a distraction but Bayley cuts her off, allowing the Banks Statement to make Charlotte tap at 10:03.
Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame video. This is LONG overdue.
Sami Zayn knew Owens would do this kind of thing and he told us all it would happen. He sees a lot of similarities between Owens and Samoa Joe (insert your own Scott Steiner “HE'S FAT” joke here), including both of them doing all kinds of horrible things for the sake of some demented loyalty to someone else. Tonight, Sami is kicking Owens' teeth down his throat.
Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn
Non-title. Before the match, cue Samoa Joe to massacre Sam. For some reason he agrees to the match anyway and it's a Cannonball to crush Zayn even worse. The referee pulls him off so it's a second Cannonball and the Pop Up Powerbomb to give Owens the pin at 1:11.
At 10:48pm, this show is dedicated to the memory of Ivan Koloff.
The bosses are in the back and Stephanie ribs on Foley for not coming out there during either the women's segment or Samoa Joe beating Sami down. Foley FINALLY stands up for himself and blames Stephanie for Seth Rollins being injured. He was telling HHH and Stephanie how great Samoa Joe was twelve years ago and yells about how he's not letting Stephanie's greed get in the way of this show. Stephanie threatens him with an “accident” and Foley leaves.
Cole is in the back for a sitdown interview with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. We get straight to the point with Goldberg but Heyman cuts Cole off and says Lesnar isn't interested in questions like this one. Heyman says Lesnar isn't interested in hearing about Goldberg winning the title so Lesnar scares Cole away and stares straight into the camera.
Paul talks about Owens attacking Jericho last week because Lesnar disagrees with Owens being the most violent champion in years. Lesnar isn't interested in hearing about Owens but Heyman talks about Kevin's greatness anyway. A lot of people want to see Owens pull it off but Lesnar disagrees because if Owens loses, it's Goldberg vs. Lesnar for the title. That's just one more thing for Lesnar to conquer at Wrestlemania and that's what he wants to do.
The ring is reenforced for the main event.
Braun Strowman vs. Big Show
And yes, this really is the main event. Show grabs a wristlock to start but Braun rolls around and nips up to escape. Now that's going to get him noticed. Show shoves him down but gets punched in the jaw and dropped for his efforts. Strowman charges into a choke but easily reverses into a DDT for two. A clothesline drops Show for two and it's all Strowman so far.
Show reverses a suplex into one of his own and grabs the chokeslam for two. The powerslam doesn't work so Show puts him on top for the superplex. Strowman escapes that but dives into the KO Punch for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb, only to have Strowman get up for the powerslam (doesn't look great) for two of his own. Not that it matters as Braun hits another powerslam for the pin at 12:10.
Post match Reigns comes out and gets in a few Superman Punches but Strowman hits the powerslam to end the show.
Results
Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Cesaro/Sheamus – East River Crossing to Cesaro
Anderson and Gallows b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns used a chair
New Day b. Rusev/Jinder Mahal – Midnight Hour to Mahal
Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce – Samoan drop
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement
Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Strowman b. Big Show – Powerslam
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: February 21, 2017
Location: Citizens Business Bank Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga. Tom Phillips, Mauro Ranallo
It's a double shot tonight as we have a pair of big gimmick matches to get us further along the Road to Wrestlemania. First up it's Natalya vs. Nikki Bella in a falls count anywhere match which should be the blowoff to their feud. Other than that it's a ten man battle royal with the winner getting the World Title shot against Bray Wyatt at Wrestlemania XXXIII. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's triple threat match for the Smackdown World Title and Randy Orton's decision to turn down his title shot against Bray Wyatt.
Opening sequence.
Here's Daniel Bryan to get things going. We're forty days from Wrestlemania and the road to get there is full of twists and turns. He brings out Women's Champion Naomi, who has been given a week to either give the title back to Alexa Bliss or face her in a rematch. We actually get the YOU DESERVE IT chants and come on now. Wyatt was a stretch for that but NAOMI? She gets a chant about how hard she's worked to get here? Give me a break.
It turns out that she's injured and isn't going to be able to defend her title. Naomi talks about how life can change in such a hurry because she was on top of the mountain a week ago and now she's looking up from the bottom. She hands over the title and says she's probably out of Wrestlemania as well.
However, she's going to be back to take the title from whomever is borrowing it in her absence. Naomi leaves and here's Alexa Bliss to laugh about the performance. With Naomi gone, Bliss says that she should be the champion since she never got her rematch. Bryan doesn't think so and the title is going to be on the line RIGHT NOW.
Women's Title: Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss
The title is vacant coming in. Becky starts fast with some rollups but gets kneed in the ribs and we hit the choking on the ropes. Bliss' basic offense continues until a quick Bexploder sends her outside as we take a break. Back with Becky getting two off a missile dropkick, which of course warrants a crowd reaction shot. Bliss gets in a quick shot to the throat for the pin (while holding trunks) and the title at 9:03 in an ending that is as sudden as it sounds.
Mickie James comes down to celebrate and gets in a fight with Becky.
Dean Ambrose wants his chance to main event Wrestlemania back and if he gets to break Baron Corbin's legs in the process, so be it.
Kalisto wants to be in the main event so tens of thousands of people can chant LUCHA LUCHA LUCHA.
Miz runs down his resume and thinks being in the main event of Wrestlemania should be added.
Natalya is ready to expose Nikki Bella as a fraud.
Breezango vs. American Alpha
Non-title with Breezango jumping them at the bell. A double kick to Jordan's head puts him in trouble. That lasts all of thirty seconds as Jordan gets over for the tag, setting up the Steiner Bulldog for the pin on Fandango at 1:45.
The Usos show up in the crowd to say they're coming for the titles. Just not tonight you see. A lot of trash is talked with threats of jumping Alpha from behind.
Black History Month video on Jackie Robinson.
AJ Styles says he's going to Wrestlemania.
Dolph Ziggler superkicks the wall of the interview set.
Mojo Rawley is ready to win another battle royal.
Luke Harper is done obeying Bray Wyatt and after tonight, there's nowhere left for Bray to run. These promos for the battle royal are a great touch and it's even better that most of them have had a different backdrop (Harper was in the Wyatt area, Mojo was in the locker room, AJ was just backstage etc.). You don't get these enough and they can do a lot of good in the span of thirty seconds.
Nikki Bella says after tonight, Natalya will be the broken Hart.
Nikki Bella vs. Natalya
Falls count anywhere. An early spear puts Natalya down and Nikki grabs her facebuster for an early two. It's already table time (falls count anywhere means No DQ by definition) but Natalya baseball slides it into Nikki's face. They quickly head over the barricade with Natalya doing You Can't See Me for a nice touch.
Nikki comes back with a shot off the barricade and the Disaster Kick (looked great for a change) to put Natalya down for two. Back to ringside they go with Natalya getting in a few kendo stick shots before loading up the announcers' table. Nikki fights out of a powerbomb attempt and gets in an Alabama Slam onto the table for a close two.
We come back from a break with Nikki getting to the ropes to break the Sharpshooter (which Natalya breaks, causing the announcers to accurately point out that she didn't have to). Nikki no sells a suplex on the ramp and they head backstage with Nikki being sent into a conveniently placed Maryse.
Nikki sends her face first into a mirror for two of her own and it's time to come back into the arena. Natalya can't get the Sharpshooter as Natalya reverses into the Fearless Lock, only to have Maryse come out with a pipe to attack Nikki (really badly that is but at least she tried). Miz drags her off and Natalya gets the cheap pin at 14:02.
Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame announcement.
Baron Corbin says he's winning.
Apollo Crews says he's winning.
Orton and Wyatt will be watching.
Battle Royal
Baron Corbin, Apollo Crews, Dolph Ziggler, The Miz, Luke Harper, Kalisto, AJ Styles, John Cena, Dean Ambrose, Mojo Rawley
The winner get the Wrestlemania title shot. After the long entrances, they waste no time in getting started with Ambrose and Corbin slugging it out in the corner. The fans are almost entirely split between Styles and Cena and you can tell they're way into this instead of not really caring. Cena and Ziggler are both sent to the apron but quickly make it back in. A bunch of near eliminations go nowhere and Cena can't get Corbin up for the AA.
We take a break and come back with Corbin as the only man standing. He tosses Rawley for the first elimination but eats a superkick from Ziggler. Kalisto gets up and starts kicking away until kind of botching what looked like a moonsault press to Dean. Ziggler and Kalisto both wind up on the apron and a pull of the mask sets up a superkick to eliminate Kalisto, getting us down to eight. Crews kicks Ziggler in the head though (DANG he healed from that knee injury in a hurry) and it's down to seven. Ziggler chairs Kalisto though and Corbin tosses Crews, who chases Ziggler off with the chair.
We're down to Corbin, Cena, Miz, Ambrose, Harper and Styles and it's AJ having to flip out of the AA. Almost everyone hits a hard strike and it's Miz in the middle of the ring, meaning it's time for the running corner dropkicks all around. Cena pops up and backdrops Miz out, which is probably a way to keep setting up that stupid mixed tag.
Back from another break with Styles and Ambrose knocking each other down. Cena loads up the Five Knuckls Shuffle on Styles but walks into End of Days. Ambrose tosses Corbin from behind and is quickly pulled to the floor for another End of Days. With Cena staggering to his feet, Miz sneaks in and tosses him, with Cena leaving a bit too calmly.
So we're down to Styles, Ambrose and Harper with Dean getting back inside. All three are quickly put on the apron for a three way slugout with Dean having to hang on very carefully. AJ gets on Dean's shoulders and gets back in, allowing Harper to superkick Dean out to the floor, leaving us with two. Harper stays on the apron and pulls AJ over the top to the join him but they're both back in a few seconds later. Luke suplexes him to the apron again but quickly follows him out there, only to have Harper pull him out at 22:22.
Actually not so fast as the referees say Harper hit at the same time (it wasn't even close and they're not showing replays) so here's Daniel Bryan for a ruling. The official decision is a draw so there's no winner. However, we will determine a winner next week. Harper blasts AJ with the discus lariat and poses to a rather mixed reaction to end the show.
Wyatt and Orton pop up on screen to laugh at Harper to end the show. That also suggests that there's no reason for AJ to have been involved in the ending like that.
Results
Alexa Bliss b. Mickie James – Rollup with a handful of trunks
American Alpha b. Breezango – Steiner Bulldog to Fandango
Natalya b. Nikki Bella – Pin after a pipe shot from Maryse
A battle royal went to a draw
Wednesday
NXT
Date: February 22, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Percy Watson, Nigel McGuinness
We're getting closer and closer to Orlando as we're....well we're still in Orlando but it's not the big show yet. Tonight's big deal is a triple threat match for the #1 contendership to the Women' Title as Asuka is in need of some more competition. It's hard to say what else we've got coming up around here and that's a good thing as you could be in for a good surprise. Let's get to it.
In Memory of George Steele.
Quick video on the triple threat.
Opening sequence.
Liv Morgan vs. Peyton Royce vs. Ember Moon
#1 contenders match and Morgan is in Space Jam Tune Squad inspired gear. Moon gets sent to the floor to start and Morgan does a Matrix move to avoid the a spinning kick. The two of them head outside and Ember hits a dive over the top to take Morgan down. We take an early break and come back with Morgan taking Peyton's long legged choke in the corner.
Peyton sends her to the apron and puts on something like a full nelson with her legs before letting it go to put Ember back on the floor. Morgan comes back with an ankle scissors out of the corner for one but can't follow up because it's just an ankle scissors. The real comeback starts with a kick in the corner and a bulldog, finally drawing Ember in for the save.
A headscissors puts Moon right back outside though and it's time for a superplex. Peyton isn't fast enough though as Ember sneaks in to make it a Tower of Doom and all three are down. Moon loads up the Eclipse but Billie Kay takes it instead of Morgan, leaving Peyton to knee Ember in the face. A fisherman's suplex to Morgan is good for the pin and the title shot at 11:54.
Video on Pete Dunne and Mark Andrews.
Kassius Ohno is coming back.
Shinsuke Nakamura is healing up.
Mark Andrews vs. Pete Dunne
Rematch from the tournament where Dunne beat Andrews. Dunne goes straight for the fingers to start and then rips at the nose like a true heel. Andrews pops back up and sends him to the floor for a moonsault armdrag to take over. A second attempt doesn't work though and Dunne forearms him in the jaw, followed by stomping the fingers onto the steps.
We take a break and come back with Andrews flipping Dunne over and grabbing a springboard hurricanrana. Dunne is ready for the shooting star though and forearms Andrews out of the air. The X Plex gets two but Andrews gets out of the Bitter End. A reverse hurricanrana of all things puts Dunne down again. Another Bitter End is reversed into a small package for two and the X Plex is countered into the Stundog Millionaire. Dunne gets the knees up on the shooting star though and the Bitter End wraps Andrews up at 13:52.
Kay and Royce are ready to take the Women's Title back to Australia.
Patrick Clark is in action next week.
Tye Dillinger is ready for Sanity, no matter what they throw at him.
No Way Jose vs. Bobby Roode
Non-title and Roode's entrance is reaching Undertaker lengths. Roode takes him to the mat to start and slaps the afro a bit. Back up and it's dance time with a clothesline freaking Roode out a bit. The big spinebuster plants Jose again though and we take a break. Back with Roode striking the pose and grabbing a chinlock. Jose makes his comeback and cleans house with chops and a cobra clutch slam. The big right hand puts Roode on the floor but he comes back in and hits the Glorious DDT for the pin at 10:39.
Post match Roode goes after the knee until Kassius Ohno makes a big return for the save. Roode asks who Ohno is so Kassius talks about how he's been around the world. Now Ohno wants what Roode has, so Bobby is willing to put the title on the line right now. Roode gets in a cheap shot and starts in on the knee, only to get knocked out to the floor for his efforts. Ohno poses to end the show. Ohno got a strong reaction (not quite Nakamura but still a star level reception) and that's a good thing as he's likely going to be in the title scene very soon.
Results
Peyton Royce b. Ember Moon and Liv Morgan – Fisherman's suplex to Morgan
Pete Dunne b. Mark Andrews – Bitter End
Bobby Roode b. No Way Jose – Glorious DDT
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
Time for a wedding! It's one of the last nights of the TNA tapings and we're getting a major angle in the form of Braxton Sutter being forced to marry Laurel Van Ness for reasons that still aren't clear. Other than that we have Bobby Lashley defending the TNA World Title against newcomer Josh Barnett at some point in the near future. Let's get to it.
In memory of George Steele, Ivan Koloff Nicole Bass and Chavo Guerrero Sr.
Matt Hardy is at House Hardy where he talks to George Washington (the giraffe), who is worried about Vanguard I's drinking issues. The Seven Deities are going to teleport Matt somewhere for his transformation into the King of Gold. However, he might lose some of his abilities so therefore he has to transfer them into Jeff's body. Jeff has a pre-mo-nition which tells him that Matt is going to Egypt. Vanguard I takes Matt away.
Wedding video.
Here are Cody and Brandi Rhodes for a chat. Cody doesn't like the idea that his wife was dubbed Mini Moose (still a dumb name) last week so he'd like Moose out here right now. This brings out Moose and Cody gets straight to the point by asking if they're going to sleep together soon. Brandi isn't cool with that and asks if Cody is telling the truth. Cody says he was kidding but lays Moose out while shouting to Brandi that it's a joke. Cross Rhodes leaves Moose laying.
Post break, Cody has no comment.
Eli Drake thinks Tyrus stepped way over the line and tonight he has to take a beating.
Tyrus never liked Drake.
Eli Drake vs. Tyrus
Before he gets in the ring, we get a little more Drake trash talk which is basically a way to plug the fact that Tyrus is a Fox News contributor. A single shoulder puts Drake on the floor so he offers Tyrus more money. Tyrus growls at him so Drake lays out the referee for the DQ at 2:35.
Post match Drake offers Tyrus a raise and they hug. In other words: “I hate you!” “I hate you too!” “Want more money?” “Yeah we're cool.” Pope says this won't happen when the new management takes over. The Anthem Owl told him so.
Maria and company are getting ready for the wedding but can't find Allie.
Matt comes back from his quest and now has a regal robe. He's learned what it's going to take to make the Expedition of Gold a success. That means Skarrsgard is no longer a dilapidated boat but rather the Ark of Gold, where all the title belts will be stored.
Here's Jade to say her rivalry with Rosemary (“Red vs. Blue” is far from over. Jade wants to take the division back from the sick freak (Why does it feel like 80% of TNA storylines are about getting us back to what something is supposed to be? Sting had that feud roughly 485 times.) so here's Rosemary, who I barely remember being champion.
Josh and Pope get in an argument during the entrance and Pope hints that changes are coming to the booth. Rosemary wants the Knockouts to decay so Jade talks about going through Monster's Ball and coming out standing. We get a challenge for a Last Knockouts Standing match with Rosemary accepting. This felt really forced and Jade is far from a smooth talker.
Mike Bennett tries to give an annoyed Braxton Sutter a pep talk. Champagne is consumed and Bennett doesn't seem thrilled with his own marriage. Sutter brings up Allie but Maria has that covered.
Bram vs. Jesse Godderz
They slug it out to start as Pope keeps hinting that Josh is going to be gone soon. Godderz plants him with a belly to back suplex and a Blockbuster to set up the Adonis Lock. Kingston gets on the apron for a distraction so Jesse catapults Bram into him, setting up the rollup for the pin on Bram at 3:57.
Godderz cleans house and bails before he gets beaten down.
The Hardys teleport to the Mid-Atlantic territory where they say they wan the Tag Team Titles. A team called the Mid-Atlantic Outlaws say they're the #1 contenders so a challenge is issued but another guy says this is their way to get out of this territory and on to a better life. Apparently this means anyone winning the Tag Team Titles so they're all off to find the champions.
The Lady Squad is getting ready for the wedding when Allie finally shows up. They yell at her a bit and tell her to make sure the hotel room is ready. Allie leaves and runs into Braxton, who can't explain why he's doing this. If that's not what he wants to do, then don't do it.
Back to Mid-Atlantic where a locker room brawl breaks out and the Hardys get a title shot. Just like last week, it's a clipped up match with the Hardys beating Mathis and Rage to become champions.
Josh Barnett hasn't been impressed by Lashley and thinks he needs to show Lashley how to be a champion. I still have no idea why I'm supposed to be impressed by/care about Barnett but that's never stopped TNA before.
Bad Bones vs. Josh Barnett
Bad Bones is a tough looking guy from Germany and Lashley is on commentary. Barnett takes him to the mat and tries a chinlock but let's look at Lashley talking instead of the debuting #1 contender. A bunch of strikes have Bones in trouble but he gets in a spear through the ropes. Barnett suplexes him and gets in a nasty Jackknife followed by a keylock for the submission at 2:43. Lashley is impressed.
X-Division Title: DJZ vs. Trevor Lee
DJZ is getting his rematch and has a bad ankle coming in. That doesn't stop him from diving over the top onto the champion to start. A hurricanrana off the apron bangs up the ankle again so Lee goes after it in a smart move. The slow beating continues until an enziguri staggers Lee again. That means a Schitt's Creek plug as DJZ grabs a reverse hurricanrana. DJZ loads up the ZDT but Helms grabs the leg, allowing Lee to get in a rollup with a handful of tights to retain at 4:31.
Post match Lee loads up the Pillmanizing but Andrew Everett comes in for the save.
Maria comes up to see Sutter and offers to remind him why this is happening. Sutter says he knows and Maria threatens him with consequences if there's no wedding. We still don't know what those consequences are.
It's time for the wedding with an already drunk Bennett as the best man. Spud is flower man and Aron Rex comes out in his gear. Maria and Sienna are the bridal party and after a break, here's Laurel as the fans chant for ODB. Maria does her signature stuff and brings out Allie, who looks stunning in her bridesmaid's dress and causes Braxton's jaw to drop.
Laurel reads her own vows, talking about how your bank account is what matters and promising to buy Braxton a new wardrobe. The fans drown this out with DELETE chants and Sutter says he forgot to bring his vows. We get to the “any objections” part and Maria shouts the fans down before Allie can say anything. Maria trips her and yells when the rings fall because that's what Maria and Allie do.
Laurel says I Do but Braxton can't get the second word out. Fans: “JUST SAY NO!” Braxton says no because he can't stand being around Laurel. There's a guy out there for Laurel to make completely miserable but it's just not him. Braxton says he loves Allie and for once the fans seem to genuinely freak out over this (It couldn't be because these are characters the fans can relate to and get behind because they can't stand the villain could it?).
He knows Maria is going to fire Allie for this and he'll never see her again but he loves her and that's all that matters. Maria fires Allie but she quits instead. This might have been more effective if they hadn't had the big split moment two or three times already. Sutter punches Bennett down and Brooke comes out to help Allie. Robbie E. goes after Aron and the big kiss ends the show as Pope teases the changes AGAIN.
The big angle was good because I have a reason to care about the characters but as usual, TNA screwed themselves over by hyping this as the “most controversial wedding in wrestling history”. Not only does that basically say they know what's coming but also.....this was exactly what people were expecting. It's not like this was anything that we haven't seen a half dozen times before. The Brooke wedding a few years back where Tazz joined Aces and 8's was a bigger surprise than this one. Again though, that's TNA in a nutshell: make something bigger than it is and be disappointing because Josh can't shut up about it.
Results
Tyrus b. Eli Drake via DQ when Tyrus hit the referee
Jesse Godderz b. Bram – Rollup
Josh Barnett b. Bad Bones – Keylock
Trevor Lee b. DJZ – Rollup with a handful of tights
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Cesaro/Sheamus – East River Crossing to Cesaro
Anderson and Gallows b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns used a chair
New Day b. Rusev/Jinder Mahal – Midnight Hour to Mahal
Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce – Samoan drop
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement
Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Strowman b. Big Show – Powerslam
Smackdown
Alexa Bliss b. Mickie James – Rollup with a handful of trunks
American Alpha b. Breezango – Steiner Bulldog to Fandango
Natalya b. Nikki Bella – Pin after a pipe shot from Maryse
A battle royal went to a draw
NXT
Peyton Royce b. Ember Moon and Liv Morgan – Fisherman's suplex to Morgan
Pete Dunne b. Mark Andrews – Bitter End
Bobby Roode b. No Way Jose – Glorious DDT
Impact Wrestling
Tyrus b. Eli Drake via DQ when Tyrus hit the referee
Jesse Godderz b. Bram – Rollup
Josh Barnett b. Bad Bones – Keylock
Trevor Lee b. DJZ – Rollup with a handful of tights
Diamond Dallas Page is official for the Hall of Fame.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 20, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
It's a big show this week with a ton of things to get to. First of all, Brock Lesnar is scheduled to be in the house and that's huge in general. Second, Bayley has been told to either give her title back to Charlotte or else, which could mean multiple things. Oh and Rock might be in town. Let's get to it.
In Memory of George Steele. Not Ivan Koloff for some reason.
We open with a long recap of the Festival of Friendship and Kevin Owens turning on Chris Jericho. Sweet popcorn baked into a pie that was an amazing segment.
Owens is sitting in the ring in the dark in a chair to get things going. When he was growing up, if anyone had told him he would be defending the World Title against Goldberg in the main event of a pay per view, he would have thought you were crazy. Of course he'd be in the main event of a pay per view, but against Goldberg? The Goldberg chants start up and Owens thinks that's exactly what he wanted to hear.
That's the chant that makes Goldberg think he's invincible as they head into their match at Fastlane. At the pay per view, all Owens has to do is outlast and outsmart Goldberg because the longer a Goldberg match goes, the weaker and weaker he gets. Owens is the master of outsmarting opponents and no one knows how to play the game like him.
Goldberg can say Owens is next all he wants but as far as Owens is concerned, Goldberg is nothing. As for what happened last week with Jericho....Owens drops the mic and walks out. This is the Owens that we've been waiting to see on the main roster for a long time and that's nothing but good as we head into the final stretch to Wrestlemania. Owens was great here and that's awesome to see.
Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass
The winners get a title shot at Fastlane. Cass slugs it out with Cesaro to start before it's off to Enzo, who is launched at Sheamus in the corner. Back from an early break with Enzo in trouble but backdropping Cesaro out to the floor. Sheamus gives chase though and Cesaro just blasts Amore with an uppercut to break up the hot tag attempt (Cue crowd reaction shot!). Cass comes in a few seconds later and everything breaks down. The corkscrew uppercut drops Cass but Enzo breaks up the swing. The East River Crossing ends Cesaro at 9:17.
Post match Enzo runs his mouth and gets Brogue Kicked. That doesn't feel exactly like a heel turn.
Owens is leaving when Mick Foley comes in to say he has a match with Sami Zayn tonight. Kevin chuckles and says he thought Foley liked Sami.
Video on Braun Strowman.
Video on Bayley winning the Women's Title and fulfilling her lifelong dream. This sounds like the setup for a cruiserweight match.
Roman Reigns interrupts Foley and wants to fight Strowman tonight. Foley says that can't happen but here are Anderson and Gallows to interrupt. They want to fight Reigns again tonight and Foley agrees if Roman can find a partner.
Brian Kendrick vs. Akira Tozawa
I would have expected a bit longer build to this one. Tozawa won't shake hands so Kendrick hits him before the bell, including sending him neck/ear first into the turnbuckle hook. The Captain's Hook knocks Tozawa out and there's no match.
In the back, Kendrick says he won't be disrespected like that.
Roman Reigns/??? vs. Anderson and Gallows
Non-title and Reigns' partner is......not here as this is just going to be a handicap match. Anderson starts for the team but Roman drops them both to control early on. Gallows kicks him in the face though and it's already off to the chinlock. The Boot of Doom is broken up and it turns into a double beating on the floor. A chair is brought in but Reigns takes it away and beats the champs down for the DQ at 3:57.
Post match Reigns Superman Punches Gallows and spears Anderson out of the air, sending the champs crawling away.
Video on New Day being announced as the hosts of Wrestlemania.
New Day vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal
Reigns couldn't have beaten up Rusev and Mahal? Before the match, New Day says they're working on a bunch of things right now, including being the hosts of Wrestlemania and trying to become the voices of the hyenas in the new Lion King movie (Kofi: “That's not a joke.”
.On top of that, they've got the ice cream machine plans back and THEY'VE DIGITIZED THEM! Lana holds up a tablet and says she has the plans....which seem to be authentic. Apparently they include a flux capacitor, three unicorn hairs and New Day starts panicking. Woods: “HOW DID SHE GET THE PLANS?” Big E.: “You know she's Russian right?”
The match is joined in progress with Rusev grabbing a bearhug on Kofi. It's quickly off to Jinder, who can't do a thing due to high levels of being Jinder Mahal. Big E. comes in and cleans house, including putting Rusev on the floor for a big dive. This lets Woods take the tablet back and completely destroy it for a big pop. The Midnight Hour puts Jinder away at 3:42.
Video on George Steele.
Austin Aries is in the ring for the contract signing between Neville and Jack Gallagher. Since Gallagher is present, there are already cookies and tea prepared. Gallagher quickly signs before Neville can even come out. Neville does the same and immediately goes to leave, only to be stopped by Gallagher.
Neville mocks all of the British stereotypes and calls Gallagher a caricature. The real streets of England look like Neville but Gallagher is what the WWE Universe wanted Neville to be. Gallagher assures him that he is NOT a joke because this is the real thing. The table, including the tea is turned over and the fight is on with the headbutt sending Neville outside. Gallagher is one of my favorites at the moment but if they don't do Neville vs. Aries for the title at Wrestlemania, they've lost their minds.
Nia Jax vs. Sara Pierce
Splash and Samoan drop finish Pierce at 34 seconds.
Post match Nia says she's putting Bayley and the title on notice.
Black History Month video on Barack Obama.
Here's Bayley for her first appearance as Women's Champion. She grew up here in California and had a dream of being a champion and getting to point at a Wrestlemania sign. When she was a kid, her dad brought her to the events and bought her all the shirts and toys. Last week, the first thing she did was call her dad and it's a call she'll never forget. Bayley's dad is here tonight and the fans are making her look cool in front of her dad.
Cue Stephanie McMahon to ask if Bayley's dream included everyone wondering if she could have done it without Sasha Banks. Stephanie's daughters look up to her and she wants to know if Bayley is going to throw everything away for the sake of a championship that she didn't earn. Bayley is about to hand it over when Sasha Banks comes out to say don't do it. She thinks about it but says no way is she handing the title over. Bayley won the title because of the WWE Universe. The title belongs to all of them and she'll defend it any time any place.
Cue Charlotte to say she's cashing in her rematch at Fastlane. Sasha cuts her off and says Bayley will keep the title at the pay per view. As for tonight though, Sasha's knee is feeling fine so let's have a trip down memory lane. Stephanie makes the match right now because of course she gets to have the last word.
Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte
Bayley is on commentary. Joined in progress again with Sasha grabbing a headscissors but getting her face driven into the match. Charlotte does the Figure Four faceplants and grabs a necklock. Sasha is sent outside and we take a break. Back with Charlotte grabbing a dragon sleeper. Sasha fights out and makes her comeback, including a dropkick in the corner. Cue Dana Brooke for a distraction but Bayley cuts her off, allowing the Banks Statement to make Charlotte tap at 10:03.
Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame video. This is LONG overdue.
Sami Zayn knew Owens would do this kind of thing and he told us all it would happen. He sees a lot of similarities between Owens and Samoa Joe (insert your own Scott Steiner “HE'S FAT” joke here), including both of them doing all kinds of horrible things for the sake of some demented loyalty to someone else. Tonight, Sami is kicking Owens' teeth down his throat.
Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn
Non-title. Before the match, cue Samoa Joe to massacre Sam. For some reason he agrees to the match anyway and it's a Cannonball to crush Zayn even worse. The referee pulls him off so it's a second Cannonball and the Pop Up Powerbomb to give Owens the pin at 1:11.
At 10:48pm, this show is dedicated to the memory of Ivan Koloff.
The bosses are in the back and Stephanie ribs on Foley for not coming out there during either the women's segment or Samoa Joe beating Sami down. Foley FINALLY stands up for himself and blames Stephanie for Seth Rollins being injured. He was telling HHH and Stephanie how great Samoa Joe was twelve years ago and yells about how he's not letting Stephanie's greed get in the way of this show. Stephanie threatens him with an “accident” and Foley leaves.
Cole is in the back for a sitdown interview with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. We get straight to the point with Goldberg but Heyman cuts Cole off and says Lesnar isn't interested in questions like this one. Heyman says Lesnar isn't interested in hearing about Goldberg winning the title so Lesnar scares Cole away and stares straight into the camera.
Paul talks about Owens attacking Jericho last week because Lesnar disagrees with Owens being the most violent champion in years. Lesnar isn't interested in hearing about Owens but Heyman talks about Kevin's greatness anyway. A lot of people want to see Owens pull it off but Lesnar disagrees because if Owens loses, it's Goldberg vs. Lesnar for the title. That's just one more thing for Lesnar to conquer at Wrestlemania and that's what he wants to do.
The ring is reenforced for the main event.
Braun Strowman vs. Big Show
And yes, this really is the main event. Show grabs a wristlock to start but Braun rolls around and nips up to escape. Now that's going to get him noticed. Show shoves him down but gets punched in the jaw and dropped for his efforts. Strowman charges into a choke but easily reverses into a DDT for two. A clothesline drops Show for two and it's all Strowman so far.
Show reverses a suplex into one of his own and grabs the chokeslam for two. The powerslam doesn't work so Show puts him on top for the superplex. Strowman escapes that but dives into the KO Punch for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb, only to have Strowman get up for the powerslam (doesn't look great) for two of his own. Not that it matters as Braun hits another powerslam for the pin at 12:10.
Post match Reigns comes out and gets in a few Superman Punches but Strowman hits the powerslam to end the show.
Results
Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Cesaro/Sheamus – East River Crossing to Cesaro
Anderson and Gallows b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns used a chair
New Day b. Rusev/Jinder Mahal – Midnight Hour to Mahal
Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce – Samoan drop
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement
Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Strowman b. Big Show – Powerslam
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: February 21, 2017
Location: Citizens Business Bank Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga. Tom Phillips, Mauro Ranallo
It's a double shot tonight as we have a pair of big gimmick matches to get us further along the Road to Wrestlemania. First up it's Natalya vs. Nikki Bella in a falls count anywhere match which should be the blowoff to their feud. Other than that it's a ten man battle royal with the winner getting the World Title shot against Bray Wyatt at Wrestlemania XXXIII. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's triple threat match for the Smackdown World Title and Randy Orton's decision to turn down his title shot against Bray Wyatt.
Opening sequence.
Here's Daniel Bryan to get things going. We're forty days from Wrestlemania and the road to get there is full of twists and turns. He brings out Women's Champion Naomi, who has been given a week to either give the title back to Alexa Bliss or face her in a rematch. We actually get the YOU DESERVE IT chants and come on now. Wyatt was a stretch for that but NAOMI? She gets a chant about how hard she's worked to get here? Give me a break.
It turns out that she's injured and isn't going to be able to defend her title. Naomi talks about how life can change in such a hurry because she was on top of the mountain a week ago and now she's looking up from the bottom. She hands over the title and says she's probably out of Wrestlemania as well.
However, she's going to be back to take the title from whomever is borrowing it in her absence. Naomi leaves and here's Alexa Bliss to laugh about the performance. With Naomi gone, Bliss says that she should be the champion since she never got her rematch. Bryan doesn't think so and the title is going to be on the line RIGHT NOW.
Women's Title: Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss
The title is vacant coming in. Becky starts fast with some rollups but gets kneed in the ribs and we hit the choking on the ropes. Bliss' basic offense continues until a quick Bexploder sends her outside as we take a break. Back with Becky getting two off a missile dropkick, which of course warrants a crowd reaction shot. Bliss gets in a quick shot to the throat for the pin (while holding trunks) and the title at 9:03 in an ending that is as sudden as it sounds.
Mickie James comes down to celebrate and gets in a fight with Becky.
Dean Ambrose wants his chance to main event Wrestlemania back and if he gets to break Baron Corbin's legs in the process, so be it.
Kalisto wants to be in the main event so tens of thousands of people can chant LUCHA LUCHA LUCHA.
Miz runs down his resume and thinks being in the main event of Wrestlemania should be added.
Natalya is ready to expose Nikki Bella as a fraud.
Breezango vs. American Alpha
Non-title with Breezango jumping them at the bell. A double kick to Jordan's head puts him in trouble. That lasts all of thirty seconds as Jordan gets over for the tag, setting up the Steiner Bulldog for the pin on Fandango at 1:45.
The Usos show up in the crowd to say they're coming for the titles. Just not tonight you see. A lot of trash is talked with threats of jumping Alpha from behind.
Black History Month video on Jackie Robinson.
AJ Styles says he's going to Wrestlemania.
Dolph Ziggler superkicks the wall of the interview set.
Mojo Rawley is ready to win another battle royal.
Luke Harper is done obeying Bray Wyatt and after tonight, there's nowhere left for Bray to run. These promos for the battle royal are a great touch and it's even better that most of them have had a different backdrop (Harper was in the Wyatt area, Mojo was in the locker room, AJ was just backstage etc.). You don't get these enough and they can do a lot of good in the span of thirty seconds.
Nikki Bella says after tonight, Natalya will be the broken Hart.
Nikki Bella vs. Natalya
Falls count anywhere. An early spear puts Natalya down and Nikki grabs her facebuster for an early two. It's already table time (falls count anywhere means No DQ by definition) but Natalya baseball slides it into Nikki's face. They quickly head over the barricade with Natalya doing You Can't See Me for a nice touch.
Nikki comes back with a shot off the barricade and the Disaster Kick (looked great for a change) to put Natalya down for two. Back to ringside they go with Natalya getting in a few kendo stick shots before loading up the announcers' table. Nikki fights out of a powerbomb attempt and gets in an Alabama Slam onto the table for a close two.
We come back from a break with Nikki getting to the ropes to break the Sharpshooter (which Natalya breaks, causing the announcers to accurately point out that she didn't have to). Nikki no sells a suplex on the ramp and they head backstage with Nikki being sent into a conveniently placed Maryse.
Nikki sends her face first into a mirror for two of her own and it's time to come back into the arena. Natalya can't get the Sharpshooter as Natalya reverses into the Fearless Lock, only to have Maryse come out with a pipe to attack Nikki (really badly that is but at least she tried). Miz drags her off and Natalya gets the cheap pin at 14:02.
Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame announcement.
Baron Corbin says he's winning.
Apollo Crews says he's winning.
Orton and Wyatt will be watching.
Battle Royal
Baron Corbin, Apollo Crews, Dolph Ziggler, The Miz, Luke Harper, Kalisto, AJ Styles, John Cena, Dean Ambrose, Mojo Rawley
The winner get the Wrestlemania title shot. After the long entrances, they waste no time in getting started with Ambrose and Corbin slugging it out in the corner. The fans are almost entirely split between Styles and Cena and you can tell they're way into this instead of not really caring. Cena and Ziggler are both sent to the apron but quickly make it back in. A bunch of near eliminations go nowhere and Cena can't get Corbin up for the AA.
We take a break and come back with Corbin as the only man standing. He tosses Rawley for the first elimination but eats a superkick from Ziggler. Kalisto gets up and starts kicking away until kind of botching what looked like a moonsault press to Dean. Ziggler and Kalisto both wind up on the apron and a pull of the mask sets up a superkick to eliminate Kalisto, getting us down to eight. Crews kicks Ziggler in the head though (DANG he healed from that knee injury in a hurry) and it's down to seven. Ziggler chairs Kalisto though and Corbin tosses Crews, who chases Ziggler off with the chair.
We're down to Corbin, Cena, Miz, Ambrose, Harper and Styles and it's AJ having to flip out of the AA. Almost everyone hits a hard strike and it's Miz in the middle of the ring, meaning it's time for the running corner dropkicks all around. Cena pops up and backdrops Miz out, which is probably a way to keep setting up that stupid mixed tag.
Back from another break with Styles and Ambrose knocking each other down. Cena loads up the Five Knuckls Shuffle on Styles but walks into End of Days. Ambrose tosses Corbin from behind and is quickly pulled to the floor for another End of Days. With Cena staggering to his feet, Miz sneaks in and tosses him, with Cena leaving a bit too calmly.
So we're down to Styles, Ambrose and Harper with Dean getting back inside. All three are quickly put on the apron for a three way slugout with Dean having to hang on very carefully. AJ gets on Dean's shoulders and gets back in, allowing Harper to superkick Dean out to the floor, leaving us with two. Harper stays on the apron and pulls AJ over the top to the join him but they're both back in a few seconds later. Luke suplexes him to the apron again but quickly follows him out there, only to have Harper pull him out at 22:22.
Actually not so fast as the referees say Harper hit at the same time (it wasn't even close and they're not showing replays) so here's Daniel Bryan for a ruling. The official decision is a draw so there's no winner. However, we will determine a winner next week. Harper blasts AJ with the discus lariat and poses to a rather mixed reaction to end the show.
Wyatt and Orton pop up on screen to laugh at Harper to end the show. That also suggests that there's no reason for AJ to have been involved in the ending like that.
Results
Alexa Bliss b. Mickie James – Rollup with a handful of trunks
American Alpha b. Breezango – Steiner Bulldog to Fandango
Natalya b. Nikki Bella – Pin after a pipe shot from Maryse
A battle royal went to a draw
Wednesday
NXT
Date: February 22, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Percy Watson, Nigel McGuinness
We're getting closer and closer to Orlando as we're....well we're still in Orlando but it's not the big show yet. Tonight's big deal is a triple threat match for the #1 contendership to the Women' Title as Asuka is in need of some more competition. It's hard to say what else we've got coming up around here and that's a good thing as you could be in for a good surprise. Let's get to it.
In Memory of George Steele.
Quick video on the triple threat.
Opening sequence.
Liv Morgan vs. Peyton Royce vs. Ember Moon
#1 contenders match and Morgan is in Space Jam Tune Squad inspired gear. Moon gets sent to the floor to start and Morgan does a Matrix move to avoid the a spinning kick. The two of them head outside and Ember hits a dive over the top to take Morgan down. We take an early break and come back with Morgan taking Peyton's long legged choke in the corner.
Peyton sends her to the apron and puts on something like a full nelson with her legs before letting it go to put Ember back on the floor. Morgan comes back with an ankle scissors out of the corner for one but can't follow up because it's just an ankle scissors. The real comeback starts with a kick in the corner and a bulldog, finally drawing Ember in for the save.
A headscissors puts Moon right back outside though and it's time for a superplex. Peyton isn't fast enough though as Ember sneaks in to make it a Tower of Doom and all three are down. Moon loads up the Eclipse but Billie Kay takes it instead of Morgan, leaving Peyton to knee Ember in the face. A fisherman's suplex to Morgan is good for the pin and the title shot at 11:54.
Video on Pete Dunne and Mark Andrews.
Kassius Ohno is coming back.
Shinsuke Nakamura is healing up.
Mark Andrews vs. Pete Dunne
Rematch from the tournament where Dunne beat Andrews. Dunne goes straight for the fingers to start and then rips at the nose like a true heel. Andrews pops back up and sends him to the floor for a moonsault armdrag to take over. A second attempt doesn't work though and Dunne forearms him in the jaw, followed by stomping the fingers onto the steps.
We take a break and come back with Andrews flipping Dunne over and grabbing a springboard hurricanrana. Dunne is ready for the shooting star though and forearms Andrews out of the air. The X Plex gets two but Andrews gets out of the Bitter End. A reverse hurricanrana of all things puts Dunne down again. Another Bitter End is reversed into a small package for two and the X Plex is countered into the Stundog Millionaire. Dunne gets the knees up on the shooting star though and the Bitter End wraps Andrews up at 13:52.
Kay and Royce are ready to take the Women's Title back to Australia.
Patrick Clark is in action next week.
Tye Dillinger is ready for Sanity, no matter what they throw at him.
No Way Jose vs. Bobby Roode
Non-title and Roode's entrance is reaching Undertaker lengths. Roode takes him to the mat to start and slaps the afro a bit. Back up and it's dance time with a clothesline freaking Roode out a bit. The big spinebuster plants Jose again though and we take a break. Back with Roode striking the pose and grabbing a chinlock. Jose makes his comeback and cleans house with chops and a cobra clutch slam. The big right hand puts Roode on the floor but he comes back in and hits the Glorious DDT for the pin at 10:39.
Post match Roode goes after the knee until Kassius Ohno makes a big return for the save. Roode asks who Ohno is so Kassius talks about how he's been around the world. Now Ohno wants what Roode has, so Bobby is willing to put the title on the line right now. Roode gets in a cheap shot and starts in on the knee, only to get knocked out to the floor for his efforts. Ohno poses to end the show. Ohno got a strong reaction (not quite Nakamura but still a star level reception) and that's a good thing as he's likely going to be in the title scene very soon.
Results
Peyton Royce b. Ember Moon and Liv Morgan – Fisherman's suplex to Morgan
Pete Dunne b. Mark Andrews – Bitter End
Bobby Roode b. No Way Jose – Glorious DDT
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2017
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
Time for a wedding! It's one of the last nights of the TNA tapings and we're getting a major angle in the form of Braxton Sutter being forced to marry Laurel Van Ness for reasons that still aren't clear. Other than that we have Bobby Lashley defending the TNA World Title against newcomer Josh Barnett at some point in the near future. Let's get to it.
In memory of George Steele, Ivan Koloff Nicole Bass and Chavo Guerrero Sr.
Matt Hardy is at House Hardy where he talks to George Washington (the giraffe), who is worried about Vanguard I's drinking issues. The Seven Deities are going to teleport Matt somewhere for his transformation into the King of Gold. However, he might lose some of his abilities so therefore he has to transfer them into Jeff's body. Jeff has a pre-mo-nition which tells him that Matt is going to Egypt. Vanguard I takes Matt away.
Wedding video.
Here are Cody and Brandi Rhodes for a chat. Cody doesn't like the idea that his wife was dubbed Mini Moose (still a dumb name) last week so he'd like Moose out here right now. This brings out Moose and Cody gets straight to the point by asking if they're going to sleep together soon. Brandi isn't cool with that and asks if Cody is telling the truth. Cody says he was kidding but lays Moose out while shouting to Brandi that it's a joke. Cross Rhodes leaves Moose laying.
Post break, Cody has no comment.
Eli Drake thinks Tyrus stepped way over the line and tonight he has to take a beating.
Tyrus never liked Drake.
Eli Drake vs. Tyrus
Before he gets in the ring, we get a little more Drake trash talk which is basically a way to plug the fact that Tyrus is a Fox News contributor. A single shoulder puts Drake on the floor so he offers Tyrus more money. Tyrus growls at him so Drake lays out the referee for the DQ at 2:35.
Post match Drake offers Tyrus a raise and they hug. In other words: “I hate you!” “I hate you too!” “Want more money?” “Yeah we're cool.” Pope says this won't happen when the new management takes over. The Anthem Owl told him so.
Maria and company are getting ready for the wedding but can't find Allie.
Matt comes back from his quest and now has a regal robe. He's learned what it's going to take to make the Expedition of Gold a success. That means Skarrsgard is no longer a dilapidated boat but rather the Ark of Gold, where all the title belts will be stored.
Here's Jade to say her rivalry with Rosemary (“Red vs. Blue”
is far from over. Jade wants to take the division back from the sick freak (Why does it feel like 80% of TNA storylines are about getting us back to what something is supposed to be? Sting had that feud roughly 485 times.) so here's Rosemary, who I barely remember being champion.Josh and Pope get in an argument during the entrance and Pope hints that changes are coming to the booth. Rosemary wants the Knockouts to decay so Jade talks about going through Monster's Ball and coming out standing. We get a challenge for a Last Knockouts Standing match with Rosemary accepting. This felt really forced and Jade is far from a smooth talker.
Mike Bennett tries to give an annoyed Braxton Sutter a pep talk. Champagne is consumed and Bennett doesn't seem thrilled with his own marriage. Sutter brings up Allie but Maria has that covered.
Bram vs. Jesse Godderz
They slug it out to start as Pope keeps hinting that Josh is going to be gone soon. Godderz plants him with a belly to back suplex and a Blockbuster to set up the Adonis Lock. Kingston gets on the apron for a distraction so Jesse catapults Bram into him, setting up the rollup for the pin on Bram at 3:57.
Godderz cleans house and bails before he gets beaten down.
The Hardys teleport to the Mid-Atlantic territory where they say they wan the Tag Team Titles. A team called the Mid-Atlantic Outlaws say they're the #1 contenders so a challenge is issued but another guy says this is their way to get out of this territory and on to a better life. Apparently this means anyone winning the Tag Team Titles so they're all off to find the champions.
The Lady Squad is getting ready for the wedding when Allie finally shows up. They yell at her a bit and tell her to make sure the hotel room is ready. Allie leaves and runs into Braxton, who can't explain why he's doing this. If that's not what he wants to do, then don't do it.
Back to Mid-Atlantic where a locker room brawl breaks out and the Hardys get a title shot. Just like last week, it's a clipped up match with the Hardys beating Mathis and Rage to become champions.
Josh Barnett hasn't been impressed by Lashley and thinks he needs to show Lashley how to be a champion. I still have no idea why I'm supposed to be impressed by/care about Barnett but that's never stopped TNA before.
Bad Bones vs. Josh Barnett
Bad Bones is a tough looking guy from Germany and Lashley is on commentary. Barnett takes him to the mat and tries a chinlock but let's look at Lashley talking instead of the debuting #1 contender. A bunch of strikes have Bones in trouble but he gets in a spear through the ropes. Barnett suplexes him and gets in a nasty Jackknife followed by a keylock for the submission at 2:43. Lashley is impressed.
X-Division Title: DJZ vs. Trevor Lee
DJZ is getting his rematch and has a bad ankle coming in. That doesn't stop him from diving over the top onto the champion to start. A hurricanrana off the apron bangs up the ankle again so Lee goes after it in a smart move. The slow beating continues until an enziguri staggers Lee again. That means a Schitt's Creek plug as DJZ grabs a reverse hurricanrana. DJZ loads up the ZDT but Helms grabs the leg, allowing Lee to get in a rollup with a handful of tights to retain at 4:31.
Post match Lee loads up the Pillmanizing but Andrew Everett comes in for the save.
Maria comes up to see Sutter and offers to remind him why this is happening. Sutter says he knows and Maria threatens him with consequences if there's no wedding. We still don't know what those consequences are.
It's time for the wedding with an already drunk Bennett as the best man. Spud is flower man and Aron Rex comes out in his gear. Maria and Sienna are the bridal party and after a break, here's Laurel as the fans chant for ODB. Maria does her signature stuff and brings out Allie, who looks stunning in her bridesmaid's dress and causes Braxton's jaw to drop.
Laurel reads her own vows, talking about how your bank account is what matters and promising to buy Braxton a new wardrobe. The fans drown this out with DELETE chants and Sutter says he forgot to bring his vows. We get to the “any objections” part and Maria shouts the fans down before Allie can say anything. Maria trips her and yells when the rings fall because that's what Maria and Allie do.
Laurel says I Do but Braxton can't get the second word out. Fans: “JUST SAY NO!” Braxton says no because he can't stand being around Laurel. There's a guy out there for Laurel to make completely miserable but it's just not him. Braxton says he loves Allie and for once the fans seem to genuinely freak out over this (It couldn't be because these are characters the fans can relate to and get behind because they can't stand the villain could it?).
He knows Maria is going to fire Allie for this and he'll never see her again but he loves her and that's all that matters. Maria fires Allie but she quits instead. This might have been more effective if they hadn't had the big split moment two or three times already. Sutter punches Bennett down and Brooke comes out to help Allie. Robbie E. goes after Aron and the big kiss ends the show as Pope teases the changes AGAIN.
The big angle was good because I have a reason to care about the characters but as usual, TNA screwed themselves over by hyping this as the “most controversial wedding in wrestling history”. Not only does that basically say they know what's coming but also.....this was exactly what people were expecting. It's not like this was anything that we haven't seen a half dozen times before. The Brooke wedding a few years back where Tazz joined Aces and 8's was a bigger surprise than this one. Again though, that's TNA in a nutshell: make something bigger than it is and be disappointing because Josh can't shut up about it.
Results
Tyrus b. Eli Drake via DQ when Tyrus hit the referee
Jesse Godderz b. Bram – Rollup
Josh Barnett b. Bad Bones – Keylock
Trevor Lee b. DJZ – Rollup with a handful of tights
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Cesaro/Sheamus – East River Crossing to Cesaro
Anderson and Gallows b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns used a chair
New Day b. Rusev/Jinder Mahal – Midnight Hour to Mahal
Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce – Samoan drop
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement
Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Strowman b. Big Show – Powerslam
Smackdown
Alexa Bliss b. Mickie James – Rollup with a handful of trunks
American Alpha b. Breezango – Steiner Bulldog to Fandango
Natalya b. Nikki Bella – Pin after a pipe shot from Maryse
A battle royal went to a draw
NXT
Peyton Royce b. Ember Moon and Liv Morgan – Fisherman's suplex to Morgan
Pete Dunne b. Mark Andrews – Bitter End
Bobby Roode b. No Way Jose – Glorious DDT
Impact Wrestling
Tyrus b. Eli Drake via DQ when Tyrus hit the referee
Jesse Godderz b. Bram – Rollup
Josh Barnett b. Bad Bones – Keylock
Trevor Lee b. DJZ – Rollup with a handful of tights