Sexual Taboo

[TheOneBigWill]

Its a phrase many of us have likely heard, but one some of us may not fully understand. Basically, this thread is to point out some of the more "sexual taboo's" and to discuss why you believe they're seen as just that; taboo.

Real quick, for those who aren't familiar with the term or word, "taboo", its basically a way of saying improper or unacceptable by a large margin of individuals. Basically, its actions that aren't seen as being right. In sexual terms, its actions that are viewed as nasty, disturbing, and even disgusting.

My main question is this.. why do YOU specifically feel each of the following, as well as any other so-called "sexual taboo's" is viewed as such?

Anal​

While I'm sure its no surprise, I'm a big fan of anal sex. Once upon a time, this was one of the most "in the closest" sexual taboo's there ever was. Yet at the same time, it was one of the most widely speculated sexual acts around.

Its become almost a regular thing in Adult's sex lives, just like Oral sex, or plain old fashioned sex in general. Anal sex has been proven to be one of the best experiences in finding some of the greatest orgasms (for both male, and female, alike) to date.

While some people still see it as "nasty" or "dirty", anal sex has become one of the biggest sexual actions to perform over the previous few years that its almost on the verge of breaking away from being considered taboo anymore, at all.

One final note in regard to this. Anal sex is so widely talked about, and considered as regular, that Doctor's will bring anal sex up as a way to increase feelings and stimulation during Pregnancy.

Role Playing​

While I can't say I've ever tried this, I can certainly see the beneficial reactions from Role Playing. More or less, this is something that is done to spice up a couple's sex life. Some believe its wrong to do, as its a way of showing your regular love life isn't top quality, or its lacking something major to have to commit to playing out alternative lives by way of "characters".

I don't think that's the case at all. I think Role Playing is something that ONLY the most intimate couples will interact with. It takes a lot to trust your Partner, and to believe that they'll bring to life any one bit of some type of sexual fantasy by way of Role Playing, shows that you trust them beyond ways that anyone else has shown.

Personally, I'm still slightly frightened and fall into the old school category of people who believe if you do jump into Role Playing, its a way of believing what you're currently doing is becoming dull, boring, and unsatisfying. But at the same time, its not something I'll ever allow myself to turn my back on, as it could easily become a great way to release emotions.

Multi-Group Sex​

Out of every category I'm discussing to begin this thread, this is the single most one I'd NEVER be interested in. Albeit, just because I'm not does not mean the world isn't.

Multi-Group sex, or better known as Threesomes, Foursomes, Orgies, Gang bangs, etc.. have become popular amongst College kids it seems, and overall individuals with two sets of views.

One group would be the young, adventurous type. Willing to try anything once, just so they can say they have. Another group would be the older type, fully being able to trust their Partner, but yet knowing that sometimes it doesn't hurt to think "outside the box".

While as I stated, this is the #1 thing I'm in absolute refusal to try, I can also be open minded enough to see how thousands, if not millions, have come to be so enthralled by this activity.

My personal feelings on this subject is that if you're in a committed relationship, or in any type of relationship with someone you believe could be your Life-Partner, then the last thing you're gonna want to do - is watch them get fucked by someone else. It just won't sit well with your mind, and it'll plaque you for the rest of your life.

One final note; Its been reported that Multi-Group sex is the #1 thing out of each of these categories that Males would love to try - however, its because of fantasies that play out in their minds, of questioning what it'd be like to see their Partner being pleased by another. Whereas, if it were to truly happen, the life-like results would be anything but "dreamy" and once again create that void in your mind, and haunt you for the rest of your time together.

Fetishes​

This is a wide open subject. Fetishes can be any number of things thats spawned to get a person off. (So to speak) While the biggest fetishes I've ever known to be around are that of - school girl/french maid outfits, feet, and the size of a Woman's breasts or ass. I also know there are smaller cases of more severe fetishes.

In some examples, a fetish is a dangerous thing and can be harmful. One way of explaining this, would be to use the term "Donkey Punch". Basically put, this is a sexual act in which you punch the "receiver" in the back of the head/neck, causing the "area" in which you're penetrating to tighten up suddenly - resulting in an even more satisfying sexual ending. However, some cases have been known to cause actual harm, including almost fatal injuries.

Speaking in terms of fatal injuries, this would bring us to another type of fetish, in which you choke one another, to the point of passing out - or beyond the point of passing out, right before climaxing. This is meant to give a euphoric experience, but at the same time its very dangerous and can be extremely lethal.

In the end, while some unique Fetishes may strike my attention for the most part, I see no real excitement gained from attempting to do physical harm to my lover.

Public Sex​

This is something that, similar to Anal sex, has become more and more dominate in wanting to try out and be less and less "taboo". Once upon a time, to have sex anywhere than in a bed, was seemingly against an unwritten law.

In today's world, its rare to find anyone who's had sex - that hasn't done it in a public place. Of course, public can be anywhere outside of your own home.

To me, the thought of sex in public is arousing because of the chance of being caught rising. While I don't get off, or even get aroused by the thought of having someone straight-up watch me having sex.. the thought of being caught, while in mid-process, is quite the opposite.

Sex Toys​

Last, but not least, sexual toys. Just like a few other categories we've already went through - sex toys have been seen once upon a time as forbidden and wrong. Now, they're seen by everyone as the best way to have and practice safe sex.

Once again, Sex toys are border lining being considered "taboo" anymore, because even Doctor's will recommend using them to protect yourself, and your Partner.

While I'm fine with a toy that can bring a Woman to orgasm, I have to admit its kinda like what I imagine a lot of Factory workers thought, when Machines came in to replace the jobs they were doing. Basically put, I don't feel like being replaced by something that requires batteries.

However, on the flip side.. sometimes the expressions, reactions and overall pleasure a toy can give, whether receiving or giving, is priceless to say the least.

Overall Thoughts​

So, hopefully people can put away their Pride and Shy nature and find a way to discuss their opinions on Sexual Taboo's. Let's keep in mind, the majority of us are all Adults here.. so let's try and conduct ourselves with at least a little bit of maturity and find reasonable opinions and topics within this to discuss - instead of merely seeing this as a negative, or a topic too taboo to discuss, shall we?

Basically I'm asking for everyone's opinions on Sexual Taboo. Do you believe any of the above categories are too much and should remain taboo, (in the dark, too dirty to be known of) or do you believe they're widely known enough now, that the bigger majority of people are into it - and its not such a "need to hide" (feel ashamed of) type of activity anymore?

Make sure you explain why you feel the way you do, about anything and everything. Thank You.

 

[Dexter]

Anal

There's a case to be made for keeping this one taboo.

The high concentration of white blood cells around the rectum, together with the risk of cuts to the rectum and that one of the functions of the rectum is to absorb fluid, increases the risk of HIV transmission because the HIV retrovirus reproduces within the immune system's T-cells/CD4 cells. Use of condoms and other precautions are a medically recommended way to lessen risk of infections. Unprotected receptive anal sex is the most risky sexual behavior in terms of HIV transmission.

Of course, as it points out, the use of a condom greatly reduces this risk but for me, the increased risk of the activity versus vaginal or oral sex, coupled with the very real possibility of condom failure, leads me to choose to abstain from this particular act outside of very committed relationships with very trusted partners.

Role Playing

What I've experienced of this, I can't say I enjoyed very much. I had a girlfriend who asked me to play out a rape fantasy with her. It's not something I was comfortable with to begin with, but it was something that she really wanted to do, so I agreed to it, and I regret it. I'm not going to go into any details (not because I'm too shy to discuss it, but because it's not a good memory and not something I really want to talk about), but it eventually lead to us ending the relationship.

Multi-Partner Sex

I have a very close friend who's married. They have been married for 10 years, and have, at least as far as I can tell, been blissfully happy the whole time. They've also been open to other partners for the majority of their time together.

It's not something I can truthfully say I understand entirely. I can't wrap my head around the concept of them being completely un-jealous in that situation, but they genuinely seem to be ok with it. In fact, they both swear that it strengthens their bond to one another. I believe them, because I've seen how strong their marriage is, but I still don't understand it.

Point being, it apparently IS possible to be in a committed relationship and still allow multiple partners. Lots of people do it.

Fetishes

I'm going to request that we draw a distinction here. The first few things you mention (breast and ass size, certain outfits, feet, etc) just don't strike me as "fetishes". They're just... things people enjoy. For example... me? I don't think there's anything sexier in the world than a woman wearing one of my big baggy t-shirts and nothing else. It's just sexy as fuck. But is that a fetish? No, not at all. I just dig it.

What you go on to describe though is more along the lines of what I would consider a fetish. Kinda. It's really more like sexual assault, but the point is, I think the term "fetish" is more accurately applied to something pathological. So to extend your example... a guy DPing some chick for the hell of it is just him being a douchebag, but a guy that's incapable of sexual gratification unless he DPs some chick is a fetish.

Public Sex

Thrilling as fuck. I've done it, I loved it, I don't regret the experience. So I'd be a total hypocrite to sit here and say "it's wrong, it's illegal, etc" when I've not only done it, but enjoyed it.

Sex Toys

I totally get that whole "being replaced" thing you're describing. It makes sense, but it's unfounded. I don't believe there's a significant demographic of women out there than abstain from sex with living human beings in favor of their vibrator. A solo experience can be a good thing, as I'm sure we can all attest to, but it's absolutely no substitute for the real thing.

That having been said, toys can, if you're open to the experience, be used to enhance sex with a partner. I don't think you want to hear the details of my own experience with this, nor do I think the mods would appreciate me spelling it out in this forum, so just take my word for it.

My Own Overall Thoughts

Inhibitions suck. They really do. I'm sure as hell in no position to tell someone what they should or shouldn't do in the privacy of their own home (or the Ladies' Fitting Room of Wal-Mart for that matter), but in my own estimation, if you're refraining from something simply because it's "taboo", you're denying yourself a world of experiences, and that's a damned shame.

Oh, and excellent topic, TOBW. Thanks for bringing this up.

 

[Phoenix]

Anal​

I think you described it best as it's almost become a regular thing in an Adult's sex life. It certainly becoming one of those "must do" things for men on a girl. I think it's also because of how homosexuality is becoming more accepted in this day and age. Before I get attacked, reason I say that is because naturally homosexuality was the act that occured before anal sex was considered a thing to do in hetrosexual sex. Because homosexuality was becoming an accepted "taboo" it makes anal sex less of a taboo.

I will be honest and say, I've always wanted to try anal sex with a girl, but my last girlfriend didn't want to and yet I couldn't stop thinking about it, I think that's how I mean by why it's becoming a "must do" thing for men, because you get the urge to try it because every talks about it.

Role Playing​

Essentially you're acting to spice up the sex really. I think it's not really a taboo one because you see it on TV and films so that's where it is inspired from.

I think roleplay can be dangerous because how much of the fantasy will you fall into? Will you start wanting to see the character more than your loved one or replace her completely. I think you can do teasing roll play depending on the situation, like say you had an injury you need your "nurse" to take a better look, just playing as opposed to dressing up in a role completely.

I would say I've half tried it cause say on a night out with fancy dress or playing around with outfits in general, you the moment coming, but you drop the characters and become you the moment you kiss or do anything.

Roleplaying can be fun, but you need to have it controlled because as you said, it's more an act of replacing what you have if it turns to a point where you're wanting a character more than your loved one.

Multi-Group Sex​

I think I can only be attracted to the idea of this when being a single guy, but I could never do this act either.

I think the one thing that makes sex more special to anyone is connectivity and you can only truly have that with one person, if you bring another person in, it becomes an intrusion on that, jealousy can grow as well as boredom.

Much like the roleplay, it's bringing in someone else to spice things up and it can be dangerous because the moment you become intimate with the other person, that's where the problems will start. Where sex is good for make up and argument resolving, threesomes and group sex is the one that will start them from doubts of loving your partner to "You were more into her than me". It's practically both of you cheating but accepting it because you're both there, but it's when it hits you that's the problem.

While it's a must do for males who are single, it shouldn't be considered when in a relationship, when it comes up, you know your relationship has problem because you need another to kick it off again. Ideal for a single person, trouble for a couple.

I think also, the only time where roleplay is more accepted nowadays is through phone sex, because you create that fantasy of being with your partner to fill a void, it's more roleplaying about each other but it's something that aids a relationship when you're away from the real thing, that's when roleplay keeps you connected, literally.

Fetishes​

This one is a mix really, as you said again, it's more a case of what you like and prefer.

Now festishes can come down to features, age, sensuality, sexuality, pain and control. Pain is the one where it becomes dangerous, as you said you got things like "Donkey Punch", bondage with ropes and chains to being walked on with big m'f heels digging into you. Naturally this sort of thing is dangerous, but it's something that you expect people who have no thrill in life to do, they need something to feel alive to do it.

Naturally the others abit more ligther, I mean control is S&M (Slave and Master), it's mixing roleplay but giving control of the action to one person and that can be a big turn on for most because control is one thing that people love in sex, whether they have it or lose it plays out.

Naturally other fetishes are more to what you're attracted to and what gives you that bit extra on the odd occasion. In the end it's what you get your kicks out of, but as you said, it is physically dangerous in some case and you shouldn't let them be a fixed event, use them at different occasions for those extra special nights because if you constantly rely on a kicker to fulfill your fantasy, then it becomes difficult the moment you meet someone who says no.

Public Sex​

As you said perfectly, it's more a thing to do nowadays and personally, it's one of my favourite things I like. Not just the thrill of being caught, but it's more the spontaneous feel to it. The fact that you want your partner and you can have them right now wherever you are, it opens you up because you don't want the mood to go away.

Where for some it's about where they've done it ie cinema, plane, etc I think it's more about the thrills and being caught in the moment that makes this the best experience. You could easily mark it as a fetish, but it stands out by itself now.

Sex Toys​

I understand the thoughts and ideas of the replacement worry, but really I think sex toys, like a vibrator, are really just a *********ion device for women. That's where I feel they're more accepted these days because where everyone knows guys are up to things when they're alone, is it wrong for women to do the same?

Sex toys, as Dexter said, can never truly replace the real thing, it can add to it, but it's really to give women something so they achieve what men do already. Think the vibrator is bad, they got a male equivelent on the way, not going into details. But really they do no harm, it's just a worry when the first time they came on the scene that men got scared.

Overall Thoughts​

I think sexual taboo has dropped rapidly over time, it's more accepted because sex plays an active role in everyone's lives. It's just when things like these first came up and were done rarely, people thought of it as taboo, but they caught on and it's become part of people's sex lives. I mean we have things today that we accept from strip clubs to group sex parties and so on. So the majority has now caught on and accepted these, back in the day on the minority did these, where they were considered taboo. The less people do something, the more taboo it is, when a community/majorty does it, the taboo factor drops.