berlinbrawler
Lovable Curmudgeon
OK, maybe not really. But I have a hard time remembering the last time I laughed so hard. As a kid I only noticed that the movie was bad. I didn't notice, however, how unintentionally hilarious that piece of crap was. Here are some thoughts and questions that went through my head watching this masterpiece of shit. (In no particular order.)
Why bother dressing him in blue and calling him RIP? They should have just called it "Hulk Hogan - the movie."
Leave it to Terry Bollea and Vince to make a movie portraying Hulk Hogan as a bigger commodity than Elvis, the Beatles and the Super Bowl combined.
Was the Mr. McMahon character in the late 90s WWF based on mr. Bell?
That's one dedicated wrestler who stays in character 24/7, even when he just prevented a goon from raping his girlfriend. RIP 'EM, BROTHER!
Speaking of which, how creepy is it that RIP apparently thinks the rape attempt is hilarious, seeing as he is laughing his ass off the entire time (shortly before launching the guy headfirst into a tree, almost certainly killing him).
How ironic is it that RIP stays loyal to his company, when shortly after the movie Hulk Hogan didn't hesitate to sell out to Turner's greener pasture?
Like, seriously, Bell makes it a point that the check is BLANK. So rather than filling in the amount of 500 Billion Dollars, RIP just refuses to take it. Dumbass.
Does the movie play in some parallel universe where there is no police? Bell attempts to kidnap Rip. When that doesn't work Zeus beats Rip's little brother into paralysis. Bell's goons try to rape Rip's girlfriend and later kidnap her. And yet the only consequence Rip ever draws from all that is that he really wants a wrestling match with the guy. WTF?
Tye dyed spandex? Really?
At his first appearance, are we supposed to believe that Zeus had a huge metal door installed along with fog machines and lighting for his dramatic entrance and nobody noticed him setting all that up?
RIP's growling right before he delivered the infamous "What's that smell?"-line reminds me of my girlfriend's mother's little doggy when he's tugging on a piece of cloth.
So Zeus actually attempts to murder RIP by impaling him live on national TV. That's just… Wow.
What kind of brain damage must Zeus have, constantly screaming and growling like that? What the hell is his problem?
Randy and his buddy are the biggest jackasses on the planet and Randy deserves the beating he gets.
When Zeus tears out the guy's hair I couldn't help but thinking that someone must have done the same thing to RIP once.
Is this where TNA got the idea for a 6-sided ring?
Even though it's only implied and not really the case (THANK GOD), the very idea of RIP *********ing on the other side of the curtain almost made me throw up.
Rip foils a robbery in a diner. If they'd just emptied the cash register they would have stolen maybe 120 bucks. Instead Rip beats them up, in the process thrashing the entire place, no doubt causing thousands of dollars worth of damage. Way to go, RIP!
'Battle of the Tough guys.' Best. Pay-Per-View name. Ever!
Rip talks about spending most of his time with charity work. Humble AND a saint! The only thing missing is that at night he dons a cape and hunts the Joker.
Oh and Rip speaks French, too. He's not just a philanthropist crime fighting super celebrity, he's also highly educated and just overall perfect. I bet even his bowel movements smell like freshly roasted cinnamon buns.
At the end of the movie RIP kills both Zeus and mr. Bell, one intentionally, one by accident. RIP parties on, though, and poses happily for the camera. Is it safe to assume that the police arrives shortly thereafter to arrest him? Or is it that cop-less parallel universe situation still?
Well, whatever. RIP 'EM!!!!!!
Why bother dressing him in blue and calling him RIP? They should have just called it "Hulk Hogan - the movie."
Leave it to Terry Bollea and Vince to make a movie portraying Hulk Hogan as a bigger commodity than Elvis, the Beatles and the Super Bowl combined.
Was the Mr. McMahon character in the late 90s WWF based on mr. Bell?
That's one dedicated wrestler who stays in character 24/7, even when he just prevented a goon from raping his girlfriend. RIP 'EM, BROTHER!
Speaking of which, how creepy is it that RIP apparently thinks the rape attempt is hilarious, seeing as he is laughing his ass off the entire time (shortly before launching the guy headfirst into a tree, almost certainly killing him).
How ironic is it that RIP stays loyal to his company, when shortly after the movie Hulk Hogan didn't hesitate to sell out to Turner's greener pasture?
Like, seriously, Bell makes it a point that the check is BLANK. So rather than filling in the amount of 500 Billion Dollars, RIP just refuses to take it. Dumbass.
Does the movie play in some parallel universe where there is no police? Bell attempts to kidnap Rip. When that doesn't work Zeus beats Rip's little brother into paralysis. Bell's goons try to rape Rip's girlfriend and later kidnap her. And yet the only consequence Rip ever draws from all that is that he really wants a wrestling match with the guy. WTF?
Tye dyed spandex? Really?
At his first appearance, are we supposed to believe that Zeus had a huge metal door installed along with fog machines and lighting for his dramatic entrance and nobody noticed him setting all that up?
RIP's growling right before he delivered the infamous "What's that smell?"-line reminds me of my girlfriend's mother's little doggy when he's tugging on a piece of cloth.
So Zeus actually attempts to murder RIP by impaling him live on national TV. That's just… Wow.
What kind of brain damage must Zeus have, constantly screaming and growling like that? What the hell is his problem?
Randy and his buddy are the biggest jackasses on the planet and Randy deserves the beating he gets.
When Zeus tears out the guy's hair I couldn't help but thinking that someone must have done the same thing to RIP once.
Is this where TNA got the idea for a 6-sided ring?
Even though it's only implied and not really the case (THANK GOD), the very idea of RIP *********ing on the other side of the curtain almost made me throw up.
Rip foils a robbery in a diner. If they'd just emptied the cash register they would have stolen maybe 120 bucks. Instead Rip beats them up, in the process thrashing the entire place, no doubt causing thousands of dollars worth of damage. Way to go, RIP!
'Battle of the Tough guys.' Best. Pay-Per-View name. Ever!
Rip talks about spending most of his time with charity work. Humble AND a saint! The only thing missing is that at night he dons a cape and hunts the Joker.
Oh and Rip speaks French, too. He's not just a philanthropist crime fighting super celebrity, he's also highly educated and just overall perfect. I bet even his bowel movements smell like freshly roasted cinnamon buns.
At the end of the movie RIP kills both Zeus and mr. Bell, one intentionally, one by accident. RIP parties on, though, and poses happily for the camera. Is it safe to assume that the police arrives shortly thereafter to arrest him? Or is it that cop-less parallel universe situation still?
Well, whatever. RIP 'EM!!!!!!
