"First Samuel, Seventeen."
"Now the Philistines gathered their armies together to battle, and were gathered at Sochoh, which belongs to Judah; they encamped between Sochoh and Azekah, in Ephes Dammim. And Saul and the men of Israel were gathered together, and they encamped in the Valley of Elah, and drew up in battle array against the Philistines. The Philistines stood on a mountain on one side, and Israel stood on a mountain on the other side, with a valley between them.
And a champion went out from the camp of the Philistines, named Goliath, from Gath, whose height was six cubits and a span. He had a bronze helmet on his head, and he was armed with a coat of mail, and the weight of the coat was five thousand shekels of bronze. And he had bronze armor on his legs and a bronze javelin between his shoulders. Now the staff of his spear was like a weavers beam, and his iron spearhead weighed six hundred shekels; and a shield-bearer went before him. Then he stood and cried out to the armies of Israel, and said to them, Why have you come out to line up for battle? Am I not a Philistine, and you the servants of Saul? Choose a man for yourselves, and let him come down to me. If he is able to fight with me and kill me, then we will be your servants. But if I prevail against him and kill him, then you shall be our servants and serve us. And the Philistine said, I defy the armies of Israel this day; give me a man, that we may fight together. When Saul and all Israel heard these words of the Philistine, they were dismayed and greatly afraid.
Now David was the son of that Ephrathite of Bethlehem Judah, whose name was Jesse, and who had eight sons. And the man was old, advanced in years, in the days of Saul. The three oldest sons of Jesse had gone to follow Saul to the battle. The names of his three sons who went to the battle were Eliab the firstborn, next to him Abinadab, and the third Shammah. David was the youngest. And the three oldest followed Saul. But David occasionally went and returned from Saul to feed his fathers sheep at Bethlehem. And the Philistine drew near and presented himself forty days, morning and evening. Then Jesse said to his son David, Take now for your brothers an ephah of this dried grain and these ten loaves, and run to your brothers at the camp. And carry these ten cheeses to the captain of their thousand, and see how your brothers fare, and bring back news of them. Now Saul and they and all the men of Israel were in the Valley of Elah, fighting with the Philistines.
So David rose early in the morning, left the sheep with a keeper, and took the things and went as Jesse had commanded him. And he came to the camp as the army was going out to the fight and shouting for the battle. For Israel and the Philistines had drawn up in battle array, army against army. And David left his supplies in the hand of the supply keeper, ran to the army, and came and greeted his brothers. Then as he talked with them, there was the champion, the Philistine of Gath, Goliath by name, coming up from the armies of the Philistines; and he spoke according to the same words. So David heard them. And all the men of Israel, when they saw the man, fled from him and were dreadfully afraid. So the men of Israel said, Have you seen this man who has come up? Surely he has come up to defy Israel; and it shall be that the man who kills him the king will enrich with great riches, will give him his daughter, and give his fathers house exemption from taxes in Israel.
Then David spoke to the men who stood by him, saying, What shall be done for the man who kills this Philistine and takes away the reproach from Israel? For who is this uncircumcised Philistine, that he should defy the armies of the living God? And the people answered him in this manner, saying, So shall it be done for the man who kills him.
Now Eliab his oldest brother heard when he spoke to the men; and Eliabs anger was aroused against David, and he said, Why did you come down here? And with whom have you left those few sheep in the wilderness? I know your pride and the insolence of your heart, for you have come down to see the battle.
And David said, What have I done now? Is there not a cause? Then he turned from him toward another and said the same thing; and these people answered him as the first ones did.
Now when the words which David spoke were heard, they reported them to Saul; and he sent for him. Then David said to Saul, Let no mans heart fail because of him; your servant will go and fight with this Philistine.
And Saul said to David, You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him; for you are a youth, and he a man of war from his youth.
But David said to Saul, Your servant used to keep his fathers sheep, and when a lion or a bear came and took a lamb out of the flock, I went out after it and struck it, and delivered the lamb from its mouth; and when it arose against me, I caught it by its beard, and struck and killed it. Your servant has killed both lion and bear; and this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, seeing he has defied the armies of the living God. Moreover David said, The Lord, who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear, He will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.
And Saul said to David, Go, and the Lord be with you!
So Saul clothed David with his armor, and he put a bronze helmet on his head; he also clothed him with a coat of mail. David fastened his sword to his armor and tried to walk, for he had not tested them. And David said to Saul, I cannot walk with these, for I have not tested them. So David took them off.
Then he took his staff in his hand; and he chose for himself five smooth stones from the brook, and put them in a shepherds bag, in a pouch which he had, and his sling was in his hand. And he drew near to the Philistine. So the Philistine came, and began drawing near to David, and the man who bore the shield went before him. And when the Philistine looked about and saw David, he disdained him; for he was only a youth, ruddy and good-looking. So the Philistine said to David, Am I a dog, that you come to me with sticks? And the Philistine cursed David by his gods. And the Philistine said to David, Come to me, and I will give your flesh to the birds of the air and the beasts of the field!
Then David said to the Philistine, You come to me with a sword, with a spear, and with a javelin. But I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you and take your head from you. And this day I will give the carcasses of the camp of the Philistines to the birds of the air and the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel. Then all this assembly shall know that the Lord does not save with sword and spear; for the battle is the Lords, and He will give you into our hands.
So it was, when the Philistine arose and came and drew near to meet David, that David hurried and ran toward the army to meet the Philistine. Then David put his hand in his bag and took out a stone; and he slung it and struck the Philistine in his forehead, so that the stone sank into his forehead, and he fell on his face to the earth. So David prevailed over the Philistine with a sling and a stone, and struck the Philistine and killed him. But there was no sword in the hand of David. Therefore David ran and stood over the Philistine, took his sword and drew it out of its sheath and killed him, and cut off his head with it.
And when the Philistines saw that their champion was dead, they fled. Now the men of Israel and Judah arose and shouted, and pursued the Philistines as far as the entrance of the valley and to the gates of Ekron. And the wounded of the Philistines fell along the road to Shaaraim, even as far as Gath and Ekron. Then the children of Israel returned from chasing the Philistines, and they plundered their tents. And David took the head of the Philistine and brought it to Jerusalem, but he put his armor in his tent.
When Saul saw David going out against the Philistine, he said to Abner, the commander of the army, Abner, whose son is this youth?
And Abner said, As your soul lives, O king, I do not know.
So the king said, Inquire whose son this young man is.
Then, as David returned from the slaughter of the Philistine, Abner took him and brought him before Saul with the head of the Philistine in his hand. And Saul said to him, Whose son are you, young man?
So David answered, I am the son of your servant Jesse the Bethlehemite."
I slammed the book closed and threw it across the room, the book landing with a thud on the far wall, before again falling, this time with another thud on the floor.
"This shit is boring. Everyone knows the story of David and Goliath. This teaches me nothing."
I stood and paced around the room. The windows were open, allowing a chilling breeze to blow through the room, though the curtains were drawn, so little light penetrated through.
"September first, two thousand and four. For me it was the most important day of my life. But for Ty, well it was just another average Monday for Ty Burna."
I stopped my pacing and paused for a moment.
"See there is a difference between Ty Burna and I. That night, when Ty shocked the world and kicked me in the face, it was just another day for him, its what Ty does. Ty Burna is larger than life."
I took another brief pause, this time to pick of the Bible I had thrown across my living room.
"For me though, it was monumental. It will go down as one of the most important days of my life. Bigger than the day I was born, bigger than getting my driver's license. Bigger even than October third, two thousand seven, when I lost my virginity. Because in the world of pro wrestling, I was still just a guy, just a big kid."
I held up the Bible and tapped it a few times.
"This book though, it tells of the story of how an average man, just a child really, was able to slay a literal giant."
I tossed the Bible on the couch and took a seat, sinking into my usual spot, complete with the imprint of my ass.
"I'm not sure I believe it. I'm not sure a man who is little more than a child, much like myself, could really slay a giant, even a figurative giant like Ty. But I know this, Ty Burna has broken me."
I let out a long sigh.
"From the kick to the face, to Serafina's betrayal, to arguing with Matt. I have been completely unable to maintain any semblance of relationship on any level. I have been a bastard to the people who have actively attempted to deliver me from peril. I have been acutely undeserving of the ear that listen up and lip that kissed me on the temple."
I began to cry.
"You broke me Ty! I have nothing because of you!
I took a few moments to compose myself, taking off my glasses and drying my eyes.
Then, something unusual happened, I stopped crying, and as the crisp autumn air blew in through the open windows, I began to laugh. I realized I had one advantage over Ty.
"What happens when you fall Ty? Both of us have climbed this mountain, a climb you are all too familiar with, and as we near the peak, there is less and less room to gain footing. "
I stood, and again I began pacing around the room, this time though with an air of confidence.
"I've tried to climb this mountain before, and just like the mountain we call life, I've fallen more times than I care to remember. I know all too well the pain of losing. A loveable loser yes, but still a loser, yet time and time again I have re-geared and began that long lonely climb. At this point Ty, I know how to fall. Truth is, if I end up getting my shoulders pinned to the mat on our fateful night, I don't lose any stock, its what people have come to expect of me."
I began to gesture with my hands, pointing at the invisible Ty Burna who stood before me in my empty room.
"But what happens when Ty Burna slips? If even for just one second you place a foot wrong or grab the wrong ledge, you fall? Where do you go? Do you fade into oblivion? Do you try to catch yourself? The pressure is on you Ty, because deep down I think you are afraid of me. You send your goons after me, you send your ****e to gain my confidence, only to betray me, you ambush me, and for what? To try to gain some advantage over me all because I proved I am the better man at Lethal Lottery this year?"
I begin to smile.
"The fans that cheer me night in and night out, they keep me going, and come Kingdom Come when fifty five thousand strong pack the Tokyo Dome and begin to chant 'Mikey! Mikey! Mikey' or 'Live Más! Live Más! Live Más!' there will be no room at the top of that mountain for you, and you will fall, into the cold depths, and it will be Game Fucking Over!"
I begin to turn, but pause just briefly, then turn to the invisible Ty I have been talking to.
"And you can write that down in your little scroll bitch!"