He also writes those posts of his own accord, not trying to keep a deadline by force. Its a lot different, doc
Ya know, I'm not sure if that's supposed to be an insult, a general statement, or what that's supposed to be? Not that I am taking it as an insult or anything, I just really couldn't quite feel that one out. Oh Well.
What is the character you wanted to do?
Ok let me paint a picture of this guy for you first. First, let's start with a happy little tree right over there >>>>>.... Opps. Sorry. Every now and then I have this tendency to turn into Bob Ross for a minute. Anyways. Painting the picture of this character for you to visualize in your head.
Ok, for starters this guy is like 57 years old alright, he's aged very gracefully outside of his natural laying shoulder length silver hair, it has kind of a wave to it as it goes from his scalp to just above his shoulders, very thick, with long bangs relaxed into his face parted down the middle, very 70's. He could pass for his early 40's with a dye job easily to give you an idea of how aged he is.. He's 5'9'' and about 210 lbs, built like a farm boy. He's pretty muscular but not defined as he is older, but still has a flat stomach kind of how Hogan does still, but this guy is closer to Ric Flair in build, doesn't look as old though in the body and face.
He doesn't really stand up straight but kind of leaned forward with his head tilted down most of the time as he looks up at you through his thin rectangle shaped glasses that rest towards the tip of his nose with small but bright blue eyes. His face is not fat, but he has puffy cheeks and a pretty round jawline that is all covered in a thick silver beard that makes his face look really round as well. He can almost regularly be found wearing a single pocket t-shirt that is either black, dark blue, or grey wearing black russler jeans that show his almost bow legs, and those black velcro shoes you see at Wal-Mart(not that I am knocking the guy for wearing Wal-Mart shoes and clothes, we've all been there, and still are) The point is that is what he is always wearing.
He works regularly as Power Washer for his boss Pete and always drives this big truck that doesn't have an actual truck bed, but a flat one the size of a regular truck bed where the power washer, the generator that runs it, and the other supplies sit. This would eventually be used to drive to the ring and spray everyone with the power washer at some point, ala scsa, and that will make more sense later.
He is a very nice guy, and so would be the character. Just likes to talk to people, doesn't even really notice if your listening half the time, but is a very good natured person who has a laugh almost like goofy but he says "Huh-Huh Ya think?"and ends almost every sentence with it, talking almost under his breath to you close up in that slightly leaned forward head tilted downward looking up through his glasses stance I mentioned earlier. EX: "So I was at the grocery store earlier and I saw this woman with big breasts, boy were they nice ones, I thought about going over there and saying "Hey baby, Got Milk? Huh Huh! Ya think? But I figured she'd slap me, Huh-Huh! Ya think?" Just a real goofy good natured guy who is kind of a horndog. He was once with some chick who took him for all his money and now he's always broke from being in debt as a result of that relationship, so he always talks about how he wishes he would win the lottery too, kind of day dreaming about it looking off into the sky.( this is all apart of the character based on the real person too.) Like out of nowhere he'll come walking out of a room "Boy, ya know I wish I'd win the Lottery." says it all the time, and works it into almost everything with the "Huh-Huh! Ya Think".
He is a real mellow guy and talks to you in a very deep voice pretty softly. Imagine Bob Ross with a deep voice. He's really into writing poetry, so on random days he'll be talking to you and just start tell you about this poem he thought up, and then recite it for you. It's always really deep and out there too like a poem about trees or something and you have to think of it being said to you in that low Bob Ross like voice very soft and smoothly like reading a bedtime story to a child. This would also be apart of his character I will explain how all of this goes together so it makes sense.
So, this is the character in a nutshell, but I haven't given you the name of the character or the stuff that goes with his gimmick. His name is Steve Essick. Naturally his name ends up being "Stone Cold Steve "The Body" Essick.
He is accompanied at all times by two dogs named Jasmine and Bear as he is a big dog lover. Jasmine is a German Shepherd and Bears mother, but Bears dad was a Pitbull/Lab mix. Bear is huge as fuck something like 140 lbs, and Jasmine is a respectable 80 pounds herself. Jasmine has had 2 litters of puppies, been hit by a car, and had the dog disease Parvo twice(this is storyline but actually happened too, all of this). So every time SCSTBE comes to the ring the announcer says "Making his way to the ring, Accompanied by Jasmine who has Parvo and Bear of the Straight Essick Society: Stone Cold Steve The Body Essick. He would always come to the ring with them on leashes, and tie them to the ring post.
Every Match at some point Steve would have the match won after hitting the "Essick Bomb", however that is when Jasmine and Bear would somehow get off their leashes and run up the ramp, with Steve running after them as soon as he realizes they are loose, costing him virtually every match by count out, as he's always going after the dogs. Steve is a fan favorite face due to his good natured personality, his dogs, which makes it unfortunate every time, as he ends up being the nice guy finishing last which is also part of the comedy.
In promos he would talk just as I described earlier always dropping his catch phrases of "Boy, I wish I'd win the lottery" ending almost ever sentence with his "Huh-Huh! Ya think?!", and randomly talking about and reciting his poems, somehow tying them into his feuds. He would also have numerous catchphrases like "Essick 3:16 says I just filed Bankruptcy", "Essick 3:16 says Jasmines got Parvo", "Essick 3:16 says I wish I'd win the Lottery", and "Essick 3:16 says Huh-Huh! Ya Think?!" always referring to him, jasmine, and bear as the Straight Essick Society as well.
During matches before the dogs get loose and run to the back, his opponent will always get thrown to the outside of the ring and SCSTBE will drag them over to the dogs who will lick the opponents face all over, as the announcer would yell "Oh my God, He just got Parvo!!! Jasmine just gave him Parvo!!!! Good God!!!!" (obviously a dog can't give a person Parvo, but it is wrestling so that doesn't matter and part of the reason it is so hilarious)Originally we were thinking of J.R. as the announcer but it would work with Michael Cole I guess.
Because he always drives the Power Washer Truck, at some point in a feud we decided he would drive it down to the ring and spray everyone with the power washer much like scsa did with the beer truck, and angle did with the milk truck.
I don't know if any of that is funny to you, maybe you just have to know the guy, but when we thought it up we thought it was pretty funny and that it would work well as a character, and storyline. Sorry about the length. Tell me what you think.
