Failed Gimmicks and "Clowns"

[Klown_Karnage]

Alright, I'm going to attempt to approach a somewhat touchy subject among the hardcore professional wrestling fans, but I think it's a subject that needs to be brought up. Has anyone else, like me, delved into this vast internet looking for little snippets of the histories of failed professional wrestling gimmicks? You know, the ones that were just too strange or silly to last? You all must have heard of some of them. Duke "Dumpster"? P.T. Hopper? The Yeti? The Gobbledegooker? Yeah, I thought I saw you wince when I mentioned that one. My question is, are there any of these "failed" gimmicks that anyone actually enjoyed (or perhaps enjoyed getting a good laugh out of) or maybe think would have worked if they were handled better?

Personally, I don't know if anyone else has ever heard of a guy named Phantasmo. He was a kind of stage-illusionist character. Frankly, he was strange and he did do things in a kind of kids' birthday party sort of way, but I think this character could have been improved upon and actually been quite successful, although I think the production cost for all of his "illusions" might have outweighed his draw. Still, I think there was some unexplored potential in this character.

In addition, I'd like to ask what the readers' favorite "clowns" of wrestling are. I've mentioned before that I think professional wrestling at least part circus and it's got its clowns (and highly entertaining ones at that.) Comedy jobbers, silly gimmick wrestlers who win through trickery and make silly backstage spots, that sort of thing. Who among these do you enjoy, find funny and entertaining?

Me, I have to separate past and present. My favorite current "clown" is Hornswoggle for reasons I've mentioned before. He's hilarious, he's mischievous, he's tricky, and he makes for a great element of surprise.

In terms of all time, though, I'd have to go with the original. Doink the Clown was the best pure comedy wrestler of all time, hands down, great in both promo spots and in the ring. I still recall his promo with the mirror during his feud with Randy Savage. Plus, he could be scary as well as funny. This made him a great heel when he was in that position.

 

[BernacK6]

Just to let you know there Klown_Karnage... there is already a thread in the Old School Wrestling Section known as the John Tenta Memorial for Terrible Gimmicks. If you would like to discuss anything within this area or look at some of the amazing exhibits by SavageTaker, Tenta, Doc & fromthesouth... by all means go to this thread. If you would like the link, here it is:

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?t=54996​

Just a friendly note for next time, failed gimmicks would usually appear in the Old School or General Wrestling discussion forums more than WWE. So check to see whats available for discussion.

Friendly note or not, it's unneccessary to call the guy out on the forum. Send him a private message.

My favorite old school gimmick was Bastion Booger cause the dude was flat out disgusting. I laughed everytime I saw that guy.

 

[Ambiguous Turd]

I actually do remember the short-lived Phantasio. I don't think I ever saw him on TV, but I saw him in their magazine, and eventually saw him on You Tube.

Let's see .... other failed gimmicks/characters (there are a lot of gimmicks that I wasn't a fan of over the years, but were still remotely successful ... these are simply some of the ones that I don't think got over at all):

Max Moon- cosmic being who used his jetpack to push him up the steps and into the ring.

Tekno Team 2000- Travis and Troy had to go back to the future, where they came from.

LOD 2000- Seeing a pattern here, with any team that has the "2000" in their name?

The New Midnight Express- Cornette's reincarnation of the Midnight Express featuring Bombastic Bob Holly and Bodacious Bart Gunn was unquestionably the flop of the year. No reaction at all.

The Stalker- Barry Windham painted up in camouflage was nothing more than a laughingstock.

Skinner- I think Steve Keirn was more over playing Doink #2 than this tobacco-spitting animal skinner.

Barry Horowitz- JR tried to get him over with the "Horowitz wins, Horowitz wins, Horowitz wins!" routine, but nobody else shared his enthusiasm for this jobber.

Alex "The Pug" Porteau- why should we be cheering for this guy, again?

Who- From who knows where, weighing who knows what ... Who??

Alundra Blayze- she could not get a good reaction from the crowd, for the life of her. They simply found her to be too bland and boring .... kind of like a lot of today's superstars.

Damien DeMento- another wrestler who got virtually no reaction from the crowd. I don't think they understood his character.

Lex Luger- Hulk Hogan's replacement?? I don't think so. Obviously the fans thought the same.

 

[Viola Moonlight]

Friendly note or not, it's unneccessary to call the guy out on the forum. Send him a private message.

Dont worry about him... KK is a good poster & I didnt call him out either. I was refering to the fact that there is already a very great & interesting thread already going on in another section that would blow KK's mind. I also gave him good green rep just because KK's stuff is pretty good in my mind. I am going to say this again: KK is a good poster.

Anywayz, I also enjoyed the fact somebody mentioned VKM. Great choice I believe with all of the antics that he has gotten up to over the years just for some comedy. One fresh example are the wars with DX, Stone Cold & having hornswoggle as his illegitmate son. So, as for my second clown choice... it would be VKM. But nobody can beat the clown himself "Doink."

 

[Klown_Karnage]

Yeps, no worries BernacK6. All is good. I'm just glad I've got peoples talking on this subject. And thank you for mentioning Bastion Booger. I had forgotten about him and he was an extremely silly man.

In addition, have you seen his very short stint as a monk/friar? Frankly his best match ever in my opinion. I think you can still find it on youtube, but I'm not quite sure how to locate it anymore. It's extremely funny, though.

 

[The Roid Rage]

I really liked The Repo Man. I thought that was a pretty funny gimmick. I remember during his run, people would bring things to the ring and he would sneak out and reposes it. I thought that was just hilarious. I mean really, how do you miss a guy like that? He had a gray singlet with what looked like tire tread all over it, and a mask that only covered his eyes. He even had rubber from tires for his knee pads. He used to be one half of Demolition too, which I did not know until years after he wrestled as Repo Man.

Now, Repo Man was one of my favorites but there are others who deserve mention in this category, let's not forget these people who gave us something to both laugh and cry for.

1.Flash Funk
2.Aldo Montoya "The Portuguese Man of War"
3.Sparky Plug Bob Holly
4.Mantaur
5.The Goon
6.The Renegade
7.Glacier
8.Van Hammer
9.Johnny B. Bad
10.The Berzerker
11.Akeem "The African Dream"
12.Gangrel
13.Giant Gonzalez
14.The Yeti
15.The Red Rooster
16.The Shockmaster
17.Nailz
18.Isaac Yankem D.D.S
19.Bastion Booger
20.Man, Mountain, Rock

There is one more guy I'd like to mention, This guy was around in the mid 90's, and he scared the shit out of me. He came off as a peaceful, calm man who didn't want any trouble, ya know what I mean? Hopefully by now you know that I am talking about a guy they called "Waylon Mercy" This guy was creepy. He was creepy because you could see people like him existing out there in the real world. He would come to the ring shaking hands with the fans, acting real polite, shake the ref's hand and the opponents, then when the bell rang, it was all over. His finisher was a sleeper hold, and when he applied it he would get a crazy wide eyed look about him as he put his opponent out. Then, after that, he'd go right back to acting like the southern gentleman he did before.

It was scary to me, I was only 10 years old at the time, and I could just see this guy being one of those people who lures kids with candy or a nice cold glass of lemonade or something, then he's got you in a pit in his basement, starving you to make your flesh loose, so he can make a body suit out of you. That was how he hit me and I never forgot it. I could just imagine this guy being some kind of serial killer or something, and the way he talked, and freaked out in the ring all added to this persona's realism in my mind. His ring entrance music even sounded creepy and right at the beginning you'd hear his creepy southern accent saying "Lives are gonna be, in Waylon Mercy's Hands" it just gave you the chills. He would be for me the best of the worst gimmicks for these reasons.

Here is a video on youtube where you can see Phantasio
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LchAsMRV10

 

[vaderpwnsall]

lol!
I used to love Arachnaman in WCW (and not a mention of copyright infringement), never quite understood how he didnt break into the Main event scene...
Remembering him tagging with Heavy Metal Van Hammer against Mr Hughes and Cactus Jack!

Here he is against a long haired Steve Austin....
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6m5e3_arachnaman-vs-steve-austin_sport

 

[Hacksaw Highway]

Does the Hurricanecount? I assumehe does, he was always a comedic character although I woudln't call him failed or a jobber. Still, I thought he was the funniest thing ever back in the day, and I'm very excited for his comeback now.

 

[MrCharisma]

Mordecai, I really was interested in watching what he could have done. I still remember his promo on eddie about lying, stealing, cheating and his sins, and then boom, got before you know it.

 

[hatehabsforever]

My favourite failed gimmick is also my favourite clown, and that would be, as many of you have already stated, Doink the Clown. But not the silly, totally comedic jobber that he turned into, I mean the original Doink when he first appeared in the WWF.

As I recall it, he would come out to the ring, acting silly and like a typical clown, but once the match started he suddenly became very serious and won his match in almost a squash fashion, followed afterwards by reverting back to the silly clown. Sort of like Festus, who is trance-like till the bell rings, then gets very intense, then reverts back to his trance again. This is how I remember the origins of Doink. Before his side kick Dink. Before the days when he just acted silly throughout the entire time he was at ringside. I remember the announcers referring to him as the evil clown Doink. This was an interesting character who cold have had some success, although inevitably a gimmick like this would have to grow stale.

In terms of gimmicks which failed that I hated, I vaguely remember some dude who came out dressed up like a baseball player. I don't know if he ever actually debuted past the vignettes because around the same time, MLB went on strike, and he was never seen or heard of again. But he looked like a mascot rather than a player; this gimmick would have had no chance of success.

And of course two gimmick which I despise which ironically still exist today are Hornswoggle and Eugene. Stupid, degrading, zero comedic value, a waste of time and valuable air time for other actual up and comers to be developed. I had hoped Dinsmore would be re-packaged into a new gimmick upon his return, no such luck. And other than assisting someone in a heel turn (see Mark Henry), I see no value in Hornswoggle whatsoever, even with the whole PG rating thing.

 

[LetsGOcenaLetsGOclapclap]

My favorite failed gimmick will always be Adam Bomb. He was easily my favorite wrestler when he was around for the few months he was. I remember him being in a King of the Ring qualifying match in either 93 or 94 and was PISSED when he lost.

 

[Kid A]

The Patriot - i remember him coming to wwe a looong time ago, he was supposed to be big, at least thats the impression that i got and he tore a tricep i think and never was the same...i swear he had the same music Angle had.

Rad Radford - lol

The Renegade - i mean he was a fake ultimate warrior, if warrior itself wasnt bad enough

Glacier - that one just a big LOL..i remember wcw pushing this guy hard and looking back its extra hilarious to me

the booty man - i know he got a bunch of love for taking ddps girl but boy was this bad..i laughed my ass off the entire time tho