The sun is just beginning to rise on the wonderful city of Chicago. As the Earth is illuminated, the cock crows, signaling to start of the day. On the top floor of Sal's Pizza, Scott Hammond and Wasabi Toyota are sound asleep on a Lazyboy and waterbed respectively after a a long night of reminiscing about their incredible accomplishments. Suddenly, two men, one dressed in the suit and the other holding a camera, burst through the door. The man in a suit, who can now be identified as Johnny Klamor, begins smacking a cowbell violently, awakening the World Tag Team Champions.
Rise and shine, sleepy heads.
Cripes, what is the meaning of this, mate? It's 7:00 AM. Why are you even awake?
Good journalism never sleeps my friend. And after you guys blew off Leon yesterday I think I deserve to get a complete and satisfactory interview on my own terms.
Bloody hell! I need my beauty sleep and I'm going to get it! You can just shove off, ya dirty wanker!
Now, now Scotty, the man has a point. We were a little rude yesterday. Don't worry though, I can handle this one. Just lay back, big fella.
A tired and cranky Hammond grunts before lying back down in his Lazyboy and quickly drifting out of consciousness.
Ok, Johnny Boy. I'm ready now.
Oh, you're ready? This isn't about when you're ready, son. We'll start when I'm well and ready.
There is an awkward pause for about twenty seconds without any movement or noise.
Ok, now I'm ready to begin. First off, don't you think your "victory" at Kingdom Come is severely tainted by the fact that you retained the titles by pinning Doug Crashin, the worst wrestler in company history, instead of being able to take down your biggest challengers, the Forgotten Powers?
Not at all, Johnny Boy. In fact, I couldn't be any prouder of what we did. I took out Doug Crashin. The Doug Crashin. One of the most dastardly cunning men in the world. The Prince of Darkness. And I, with the help of sleeping beauty over there, was able to smash my ass into his face and exterminate him from the company for good. That's what I came here for, to make up for my checkered past and make a positive impact on the world. And I did just that. I punished Doug Crashin with VENGEANCE!
And as for the Forgotten Powers, maybe we didn't pin them, but we still kept them from winning the match, which is all we need to do. We know this isn't the last we'll see of them and look forwarding to beating down that evil Doctor and the slimy King in the near future. We will rid the world of their evil and come one step closer to achieving all encompassing peace.
Klamor looks on strangely for a minute before bursting out in uncontrollable laughter.
You don't actually believe any of that crap, do you? I mean, you sound so silly. Ridding the world of all evil by defending your belts against a few callous individuals? Do you actually believe you're making a difference?
Toyota looks on at Klamor intensely for an extended period of time, not breaking his glare.
Yes, yes I do.
There is yet another pause, Toyota's eyes continuing to glare with fire into Klamor's soul. Instead of pushing the envelope any further, Klamor wisely decides to change the subject, wary of the damage an angry Matsumato Mauler could to to him.
Moving on to your match this week, the Brothers in Arms will team up to face Everest and Titus. These are two men who have you greatly outmatched in talent, accomplishments, and experience, among other things. So my question is how long to you expect to last before the two greatest wrestlers in company history pick up the pinfall and prove that the tag division and its champions are the pimple on the ass of WZCW?
Oh Johnny, aren't you just a ray of sunshine? I'm not going to sit here and make prediction. In fact, I'm not going to stand here and make them either. That's not the kind of guy I am. You are right in saying that Titrest have more experience and have won more titles that Scotty and I. Those are facts. However, some of what you say is fiction.
Scotty and I as just as talented as anyone in the 'Z. There aren't any other guys who fought skin and tooth for their lives in the dark and cold alleys of London. Scotty is one of the top bare knuckled fighters in the world. And not to brag, but I did win a fair share of age 11 and under Sumo tournaments back in Japan. That, along with my experience in the Yazuka and my Yoga make for one dynamic individual. So...yeah. I think we're pretty damn talented.
Of course. All strange descriptions of talent aside, how do the two of you, with not real quality victories to your names, expect to compete with two legends and former World Champions?
It's simple, really. We're gonna come at 'em early, come at 'em some more in the middle, and we're gonna come at 'em late.
Is that all?
No, of course not Johnny. Just having a little fun. We do have a very good reason why we'll be walking out the victors next Tuesday. Did you watch Kingdom Come, Johnny?
No, I did not watch Kingdom Come. I covered it with remarkable poise and professionalism. What are you getting at here?
Well I'm sure you saw Everest and Titus wrestle each other in the opening bout a mere couple of weeks ago. That is why they won't be successful.
You see, they may say there is no animosity between them and they are good friends and whatnot, but they don't really mean it, trust me.
Scotty and I went through the exact same thing just before Kingdom Come. We were put in a match against each other and while we played it off as nothing, it was actually a big deal. To actually go in there and try to do harm to your best friend and partner is a real traumatic experience.
In order to get prepared for Kingdom Come we had to go through countless hours of therapy and late nights of talking about our feelings. We even slept in the waterbed together a few times to regain the trust. Everest and Titus haven't even talked to each other since that experience, let alone sleep in the waterbed together. They just aren't going to be ready for the pure fire and intensity that we bring to the ring.
Well obviously I still don't believe any of the crap you're spewing, but this has dragged on long enough. Come on Marcus, let's get out of here.
Klamor and his cameraman begin to leave, but Toyota is able to grab Marcus before he exits.
I have the money, you got the stuff?
Marcus nods and pulls out a bag of white powder as Toyota hands him a wad of cash. After he exits, Toyota quickly makes his way over to his desk and looks over to make sure Hammond is still sleeping. He then opens the back and smells it with joy.
Domino, my favorite!
