Week of 8/28/2017 - 9/3/2017

Discussion in 'The Weekly Wrestling Review' started by klunderbunker, Sep 3, 2017.

  1. klunderbunker

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    Monday Night Raw
    Date: August 28, 2017
    Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
    Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Corey Graves

    We’re less than a month away from No Mercy and the show is already looking big. With Braun Strowman vs. Brock Lesnar already on the card and some more potentially huge matches being added, this show has suddenly gone from a nothing pay per view to something pretty big. Let’s get to it.

    The Miztourage is in the ring to open things up. Before Miz can get a single word out though, here’s Kurt Angle to interrupt. Angle talks about how the Intercontinental Title has been taking some hits as of late, there’s going to be a title match soon. Miz cuts him off to yell about the lack of respect the title has been shown as of late. It’s going to be fixed soon though as we’re going to have a battle royal right now with the winner facing Miz for the title next week.

    Battle Royal

    Big Show, Curtis Axel, Bo Dallas, Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Finn Balor, Jason Jordan, Curt Hawkins, R-Truth, Kalisto, Goldust, Apollo Crews, Luke Gallows, Karl Anderson, Elias

    Big Show is now clean shaven. Hawkins (listed as Curtis) is put out at the bell and everyone else turns their attention to Big Show. That goes poorly for everyone else as Show cleans house and things spread out a bit. Kalisto is put out and the Hardys feed Elias to Show for some loud chops. Cole: “That’s music to Big Show’s ears.”

    Anderson and Gallows get together to try and get rid of Show but it’s Balor’s assistance that finally gets rid of the giant. Elias (called Samson by Cole in what might be a mistake) decks Balor from behind and things break up again. The Miztourage gets rid of Truth and Goldust is put out as well at the hands of Anderson and Gallows.

    Back from a break with Crews having been eliminated. Matt gets rid of Gallows and pulls Anderson to the apron for another elimination, only to have Gallows pull Matt out for the elimination. Miz saves Dallas as the referees are distracted and things settle down again. We’ve got Balor, Jordan, Dallas, Axel, Jeff Hardy and Elias to go.

    Balor starts cleaning house but gets into a staredown with Jeff that gets the fans’ attention. Some running dropkicks in the corner have people in trouble, but here’s Bray Wyatt to eliminate Balor and then disappear again. Jordan starts throwing suplexes and gets rid of the Miztourage. There goes Elias, followed by Jordan at Jeff’s hands to give Hardy the win at 16:17.

    We look back at Braun Strowman laying out Brock Lesnar last week.

    Alexa Bliss promises to regain the title tonight. Tonight, the goddess reclaims her throne.

    Here’s Enzo Amore to talk about beating a giant like Big Cass last week. Not only can he hang with bigger men like him, he can also compete in the fast paced, high flying cruiserweight division. After bragging about winning money on Saturday’s fight, he dances around and announces his opponent.

    Enzo Amore vs. Noam Dar

    Amore spins out of a wristlock to start but gets kneed hard in the ribs. Dar pulls at the hair and knees away in the corner before being sent face first into the middle buckle. Enzo pops right back up and grabs Eat Defeat for the pin at 2:55.

    Neville says if Enzo is his competition, he’ll be Cruiserweight Champion forever.

    Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman for a chat. Heyman talks about what happened last week with Braun Strowman, who is the kind of monster that his parents warned him about. Strowman had an historic night at Summerslam when he, as Corey Graves said, monster handled Lesnar by powerslamming him through two tables. We see a clip of last week’s attack on Lesnar, which Heyman says made him know Strowman is a monster. At No Mercy, Lesnar is going to be ready for Strowman. Heyman explains what’s going to happen but Brock takes the mic. Brock: “What he’s trying to say is Suplex City b****.”

    Long recap of last week’s segment with Miz, John Cena, Samoa Joe and Roman Reigns, including their tag match. Cena vs. Reigns is confirmed for No Mercy and their contract signing is tonight.

    Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

    Rollins and Ambrose did their entrances before the commercial and before the package. That seems like some mistiming, which you don’t see around here too often. Seth starts fast by sending Cesaro outside where he comes up holding his back. Back in and a standing moonsault gives Seth two but he’s sent outside as well. Ambrose and Sheamus have the staredown but Rollins catches Cesaro diving off the apron. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker cuts Rollins off though and we take a break.

    Back with Cesaro dropping him with a gorilla press and rolling some gutwrench suplexes. A slam sets up Cesaro’s high crossbody but Seth rolls through for two. There’s the Sling Blade and a Blockbuster but Cesaro catches him on the top. Sheamus and Ambrose get into it on the floor and the distraction lets Cesaro hit a European uppercut for the pin at 10:19.

    Sheamus says he and Ambrose are up next.

    Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose

    They fight to the floor to start and it’s off to an early break. Back with Sheamus getting two off a top rope superplex and grabbing a Stretch Muffler (Brock Lock). That goes nowhere so it’s off to a Texas Cloverleaf instead. The ten forearms to the chest keep Dean in trouble and he hobbles into a boot in the corner.

    Dean grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two but gets caught on top, setting up a super Regal Roll. The Brogue Kick misses but Dean can’t hit Dirty Deeds. Cesaro and Rollins get into another argument and the chase is on through the ring. The referee deals with Cesaro, allowing Seth to knee Sheamus in the face. Dirty Deeds is good for the pin on Sheamus at 10:45.

    Emma is complaining about the whole Twitter thing again because she started the Women’s Revolution. Mickie James is sick of hearing about it (preach it) and has an idea: if Emma beats her tonight, she’ll Tweet anything Emma wants. If Mickie wins, Emma can’t say she started the Women’s Revolution again.

    Mickie James vs. Emma

    Emma has new music and they’re fighting over hashtags. Mickie kicks her down a few times but gets caught in a quick rollup to give Emma the pin at 1:42.

    Emma grabs the mic and says she started the Women’s Revolution all the way to the back.

    Kurt Angle is in the ring for the contract signing between Cena and Reigns. Cena is out first to say that he’s on Raw to face one man and Angle has made that happen for No Mercy. He’s seen Reigns being treated as the untouchable star and we’ll see how he can hang at No Mercy. Cena signs and here’s Reigns. Roman says that as great as Cena is, there’s one thing that he’s done that Cena can never do: retire the Undertaker at Wrestlemania.

    Cena kneels before him and says some people are still trying to figure Reigns out. We hear about the fans wanting to see Cena change his ways (with the term heel turn being dropped in a rare moment) before Cena says Reigns is just a guy trying to fill shoes he can never fill. Cena isn’t a man at the end of his career with a bad hip. The reason Reigns won’t sign that is because the Roman Empire is done if he does.

    Reigns says Cena sucks so Cena puts his arm around Angle and says the fans think he does too but he won a gold medal. Roman seems a bit shaken and lost for what to say. Cena: “Go ahead find it. I’ll wait. It’s called a promo and if you want to be the big dog you’re going to have to learn how to do it. SEE YOU FOURTH WALL!” Reigns gets fired up and goes on a rant that sounds straight off a message board, talking about how hard he works on the weekend so Cena can be on the Today Show.

    Then Cena gets on his tour bus and shows up at a show if they pay him enough with the big shovel to bury people around him. Reigns is the one guy he can’t bury or see. Cena calls him out for being repetitive and says “it took you five years to cut a halfway decent promo but now I’m about to cut you down to size.” He talks about the mythical golden shovel but it’s always the fans who hold the keys and they always will.

    Cena is tired of hearing the same thing for ten years by a lot tougher people. Here’s the thing: Cena hasn’t main evented Wrestlemania in five years and he was the opening match at Summerslam. He won the US Title and used it to introduce new stars to the WWE including Kevin Owens and AJ Styles (I believe he means Sami Zayn as AJ debuted way later). Reigns took the US Title as a demotion and now stands there blaming Cena for not being able to hang with him.

    Cena has seen a lot of people trying to hang at this level and he’s heard about one guy getting to do it. Now he sees Roman face to face and gets the line of the night: “You’re lucky I’m a part timer because I can do this part time way better than you ever could full time.” Reigns signs and turns over the table….and here are Anderson and Gallows to make it a tag match in the most ridiculous ending to an amazing promo I can remember in a long time.

    Cena DESTROYED Reigns here, making him sound like every other heel. Now if Reigns wins at No Mercy (which he probably will), everything will be fine for him but at the end of the day, almost no one ever can hang with Cena on the mic and he picked Reigns apart the entire time. If nothing else the lines about Reigns needing to learn promos and the fourth wall thing were outstanding. Now let’s get to this ridiculous tag match.

    Anderson and Gallows vs. John Cena/Roman Reigns

    Joined in progress with Cena in trouble in the corner as Gallows grabs a headlock. Anderson comes in for a chinlock as the announcers rave about everything Cena was saying. Gallows misses an elbow and the hot tag brings in Reigns. Roman cleans house and you can tell Reigns is ticked off here. The Superman Punch connects to both guys and it’s an AA and spear at the same time to give Reigns the pin on Anderson at 6:02.

    Here’s Elias to sing a song to the tune of Hound Dog about how much he hates Memphis. This brings Jerry Lawler out of his seat to say that Elias has a good voice but he’s missing his audience. While the people of Memphis might not appreciate what Elias is saying, they might appreciate this man: Southpaw Regional Wrestling’s own Pelvis Wesley (Heath Slater). Elias beats him up without too much effort. Cole: “I guess he didn’t want to walk with Elias.”

    Miz and Maryse are annoyed at Jeff Hardy getting a shot by just winning a battle royal.

    Sasha Banks is ready to beat Alexa.

    Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks

    Banks is defending and gets rolled up for an early two. Sasha sends her hard into the corner and grabs an armbar. They’re starting with a slow pace and Bliss bails to the floor for a breather. There are the double knees from the apron and we take a break. Back with Bliss holding an armbar of her own before starting in on the back.

    It’s off to a bow and arrow hold but Banks fights up without too much effort. The Bank Statement doesn’t work so Sasha goes with the running knees in the corner, only to miss a second attempt. Bliss goes with a hard right hand and a Code Red for a pretty close two. Banks gets in a few more knees and some aggressive forearms in the corner.

    Back up and Alexa catches her in the corner by sending her face first into a buckle. A top rope superplex connects to bust up the back even more. Bliss is slow to cover and gets caught in the Bank Statement. That’s reversed into a rollup for two and there’s the DDT to give Bliss the title back at 15:00.

    Post match Nia Jax comes out and destroys Sasha before putting Bliss on her shoulders. One electric chair later and Jax holds up the title over the new champ to end the show.

    Jeff Hardy won a battle royal last eliminating Jason Jordan
    Enzo Amore b. Noam Dar – Eat Defeat
    Cesaro b. Seth Rollins – European uppercut
    Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus – Dirty Deeds
    Emma b. Mickie James – Rollup
    Roman Reigns/John Cena b. Anderson and Gallows – Spear to Anderson
    Alexa Bliss b. Sasha Banks – DDT


    Date: August 29, 2017
    Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
    Commentators: Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

    We’re finally out of Brooklyn and it’s time to start the slow build towards Hell in a Cell. In this case that means we start dealing with the fallout of Shane McMahon costing Kevin Owens another shot at the US Title, which was the top story as we came out of last week’s show. Let’s get to it.

    Here’s Jinder Mahal to open things up as Smackdown brings the party in a hurry. He’s ready for tonight’s tag match main event when he gets to deal with Randy Orton and Shinsuke Nakamura at the same time. We get the same speech we always get: he’s tired of being disrespected because of how he looks and he should be revered. The Singh Brothers apologize to everyone in India, including their families and friends, but more importantly to Mahal. No one will ever lay another hand on him and they would like to kiss his feet to apologize.

    Before they actually can though, here’s Shinsuke Nakamura to interrupt. The fight is on until Nakamura gets caught in the numbers game. Randy Orton, Nakamura’s partner’s tonight, comes in for the save but so does Rusev. The good guys are beaten down and Mahal poses. This was way longer than it needed to be and Mahal continues to be really uninteresting.

    Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin vs. Ascension

    Chad takes Viktor down without much effort and it’s off to Shelton, who doesn’t want to do a double suplex. A regular suplex gets two instead and it’s off to Gable for a suplex of his own. Viktor throws him to the floor though and we take a break. Back with Chad still in trouble at Viktor’s hands before it’s off to Konnor for some clubbing forearms.

    Chad sends a charging Konnor into the post though and there’s the hot tag to Shelton. The Dragon Whip and a top rope clothesline have Konnor in trouble as things pick up. Everything breaks down and Chad sends Viktor into Shelton for a jumping Downward Spiral (Paydirt) and the pin at 7:16.

    Baron Corbin is tired of hearing about how he blew his opportunity because it was John Cena’s fault. Thanks to him though, the US Open Challenge is back and he’ll just have to cash in on that.

    Here’s AJ Styles to say the US Open Challenge is on right now.

    US Title: AJ Styles vs. Tye Dillinger

    AJ is defending. Hang on a second as Baron Corbin cuts Dillinger off on the ramp. Tye shoves him away but gets jumped from behind. Dillinger knocks him away again and gets inside for the opening bell. AJ slugs away to start but Dillinger breaks up the Phenomenal Blitz. Dillinger slugs away but gets kicked in the head, only to counter the Phenomena Forearm into the Tyebreaker. That’s countered as well and it’s the Calf Crusher to make Dillinger tap at 49 seconds.

    Corbin jumps Dillinger again but gets forearmed down by Styles.

    Mahal talks to Rusev in the back but Rusev says they’re not friends. He wouldn’t mind a title shot after the tag match either.

    Mike Kanellis vs. Bobby Roode

    Roode takes him to the mat with ease and gives us a GLORIOUS pose. Some chops in the corner and a hard elbow to the jaw keep Kanellis in trouble. The spinebuster sets up the Glorious DDT to end Kanellis at 2:46. Just a squash.

    Here’s Aiden English for a song but Kevin Owens interrupts. Owens asks him to vacate the premises so he can talk about what happened last week in the main event. Basically it’s all Shane’s fault that he’s not the US Champion right now. Owens won the Universal Title one year ago today and now he’s standing year without his US Title. This never would have happened in the good old days when he was on Raw where Stephanie McMahon never would have let this happen.

    Cue Shane to say Baron was Owens’ pick and turned out to be a very biased referee. Corbin didn’t even finish the match and that’s why Shane had to come out there in the first place. Owens insists he got screwed but Shane doesn’t want to hear it. Aiden needs to get back in the ring because he has a match right now.

    Aiden English vs. Sami Zayn

    Owens sits in on commentary. Aiden wastes no time in hammering away and grabbing a suplex for two. Sami fights up and throws him outside for the running flip dive, which draws Owens into the ring to take the referee’s shirt. Well they do say vertical stripes are slimming. As you might expect Sami isn’t sure what’s going on and the distraction lets Aiden jump Sami from behind. Owens adds a Pop Up Powerbomb and a fast count gives Aiden the pin at 2:24. I guess Shane was off finding a hot pretzel.

    Video package on….Sgt. Slaughter? Sponsored by Burger King? Ok then.

    Dolph Ziggler is asked what you can expect from him but he says you can expect…..nothing. He’s been around for ten years and it’s not fair that he’s just an afterthought. He’s really a star but he gets distracted by all the little things. Ziggler does the You Can’t See Me and wants to know what that even means.

    On Raw too you have a guy playing a guitar and it makes no sense. Maybe he can hop on a four wheeler like Stone Cold did and pour beer over himself while pretending to drink it. Or he can paint himself up like Finn Balor or be a superhero called Zigman. If you want all flash and no substance, that’s what you’re going to get next week. I can’t imagine I’ll ever say this again but I’m rather interested.

    Usos vs. New Day

    Non-title but the winners get to pick the stipulation for the rematch. Wait what? Are you serious? They really have NO OTHER OPTIONS to determine this? Not a singles match? Or a coin toss? Or a spelling bee? Woods is limping to the ring with a sign around his neck saying “it’s sore” due to a knee injury suffered at a house show. The fact that he can walk on it is a very good sign at least.

    Joined in progress with Jimmy charging into a Rock Bottom out of the corner. That’s enough for the hot tag to Kofi for some dropkicks and a dragon sleeper of all things to Jey. Everything breaks down and Jimmy offers a distraction so Jey can grab a rollup for the pin at 2:24 shown.

    Carmella yells at James Ellsworth for screwing up last week when Natalya comes in and threatens to make her the Baron Corbin of the women’s division. They have a match next week and Ellsworth seems to like the idea. Carmella and Ellsworth leave so Naomi can come in and talk about the title rematch in two weeks. Cat jokes are made as well.

    Lana, with the accent coming and going every few words, introduces Tamina for her match.

    Tamina vs. Tina Stock

    Stock goes after her as the LET’S GO JOBBER chant starts. Lana grabs a mic and orders that Tamina CRUSH. Tamina sends her into the corner for a knee to the head and a superkick for the pin at 59 seconds.

    Tamina and Lana have a quick photoshoot after the match.

    It’s time for Season 2 of the Fashion Files! We even have an opening sequence now with highlights of previous episodes, including a graphic saying “not at all starring Chuck Norris”. They’re back in the office (room Two B) with Breeze saying they need to solve their biggest crime now that vacation is over.

    In order to do that though, they have new tech from the boys in the lab. First up we have some long distance listening device (headphones), a blacklight, a belt (to hold your pants up) and friendship bracelets. They turn out the lights to test the blacklight and see some arrows on their boxes, eventually pointing to their room sign. The blacklight reveals that it says Two B or Not to B, which leads them to suspect Aiden English because it’s Shakespeare you see.

    Shinsuke Nakamura/Randy Orton vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal

    The good guys start brawling on the floor with the villains being sent into the barricade. We take a break before the opening bell and it’s joined in progress with Nakamura kicking Mahal in the head. Orton comes in and hammers away on the champ but the RKO is blocked. After a quick trip to the floor, a Singh Brothers distraction lets Rusev send Orton into the barricade and stomp away.

    We hit the front facelock for a bit before Mahal comes in for a knee drop. Orton sends Mahal shoulder first into the post and it’s off to Nakamura to clean some house. The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two on Rusev and Mahal has to break up a cross armbreaker. Everything breaks down and Mahal escapes the draping DDT so Orton hits a regular one. That’s rather odd. Orton can’t hit the RKO but it’s Kinshasa to put Rusev away at 7:30.

    Post match Orton stares at Nakamura and lays him out with the RKO to end the show.

    Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin b. Ascension – Paydirt to Viktor
    AJ Styles b. Tye Dillinger – Calf Crusher
    Bobby Roode b. Mike Kanellis – Glorious DDT
    Aiden English b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb from Kevin Owens
    Tamina b. Tina Stock – Superkick
    Randy Orton/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal/Rusev – Kinshasa to Rusev


    Date: August 30, 2017
    Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
    Commentators: Percy Watson, Nigel McGuinness, Mauro Ranallo

    We’re back to the regular stuff this week as NXT returns home to Full Sail. After last week’s recap/reset episode, this time we’ll be having the first storyline advancements since Brooklyn. The big story will see Drew McIntyre as the new NXT Champion and the former Ring of Honor guys biting at his heels. Let’s get to it.

    Opening sequence.

    Sanity, some security guards and possibly other wrestlers are down in the back. Three people, presumably Adam Cole, Bobby Fish and Kyle O’Reilly are seen walking away. William Regal comes in and wants medical personnel.

    Here’s McIntyre for his first comments as champion. After the required YOU DESERVE IT chants, Drew says this is his life. The last seventeen years have led him to this moment and this is his life’s work. He understands that the title comes with a big bullseye on his back. Drew brings up Cole and company and is ready to face anyone so here’s Roderick Strong to interrupt. Roderick wants a shot at the title but first, he has to face Bobby Roode. The champ seems game.

    Roode says he’s already on Smackdown but tonight he’s beating Strong and coming after his NXT Title, which he’ll bring up to Smackdown with him.

    Peyton Royce vs. Ruby Riot

    They head to the mat to start with Riot getting the better of it and scoring with a dropkick for two. An armbar keeps Royce in trouble so Peyton knees her in the face for a breather. Ruby gets thrown outside and we take a break. Back with Ruby fighting out of a chinlock and firing off a string of kicks for two. A Death Valley Driver gives Royce a quick two but Riot knocks her around even more.

    Billie Kay pulls Royce outside though, like a true friend should be doing. That’s fine with Riot, who nails a double suicide dive. Royce tries to crawl away until Riot grabs her by the legs. Billie pulls her outside for a big boot though, with the referee seeing no problem with Riot just disappearing while pulling on Royce’s leg. Back in and Peyton’s fisherman’s suplex is good for the pin at 10:45.

    Kassius Ohno comes in to ask Regal for a match with Hideo Itami. The match is already made but Ohno wants and receives no disqualifications as a bonus stipulation.

    Video on Heavy Machinery.

    Heavy Machinery vs. Edwin Nagrom/Damien Awheel

    Otis takes Awheel into the corner with a lockup, sending him climbing the buckles without breaking it up. It’s off to Knight for a front facelock on Awheel and a crossbody to both jobbers at once. The Compactor drives Awheel onto Nagrom and it’s a double pin for Dozovic at 2:11. Total squash, made only slightly more annoying by the odd jobber names.

    We look at Lars Sullivan attacking No Way Jose.

    Regal isn’t please with Sullivan being so violent and puts him in a 3-1 handicap match next week.

    Cezar Bononi vs. Andrade Cien Almas next week.

    Roderick Strong vs. Bobby Roode

    The fans chant THANK YOU BOBBY until we’re ready to go. Roode promises to prove that Strong is a failure all over again but takes too long doing GLORIOUS, allowing Roderick to punch him down. A headlock slows Strong down as Roode is a full on face here. Strong will have none of that as he hammers away at Roode’s head and grabs two straight backbreakers.

    The threat of a third backbreaker on the floor sees Roode shove Strong into the steps, followed by a spinebuster on the floor. Back from a break with Roode hitting a backbreaker of his own and striking the GLORIOUS pose. He poses a bit too long though and it’s Strong grabbing a pop up gutbuster for a breather. An Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag but Strong settles for another backbreaker. A tiger bomb into a Boston crab sends Roode straight for the ropes.

    Back up and a TKO into a Stunner gives Roode two of his own. Another spinebuster looks to set up the Glorious DDT but it’s the Angle Slam from Strong instead. The fans are split now as Roode breaks up a super backbreaker, only to get enziguried on the top. Strong settles for a superplex for another near fall and both guys are down.

    A slugout goes to Roode, who grabs the Glorious DDT for two with Roderick (it sounded like Percy called him Roger) getting his foot on the ropes. Roode makes the mistake of talking trash about Strong’s family though and it’s a jumping knee to the face. Strong nails End of Heartache, blows Roode a kiss goodbye, and hits a second to put Roode away at 17:48.

    It’s pretty clear that this is it for Roode in NXT and I was really surprised by how much I liked his time there. I’ve never quite gotten all of his hype in TNA but he was excellent in NXT with a very basic style played up to a high level. That made for some good matches to go with that outstanding theme song. I’m glad that they seem to want to do something with him on Smackdown as Roode is already 40 and deserves this kind of a run after spending so much time in TNA.

    Post match Drew comes out to stare down Strong but gets jumped by Cole and company. Regal comes out to chase them off as the three of them shout about this being their NXT and how they’re doing Regal a favor to end the show. They’re doing a solid job of making them feel like the original NWO and that’s a good thing.

    Peyton Royce b. Ruby Riot – Fisherman’s suplex
    Heavy Machinery b. Edwin Nagrom/Damien Awheel
    Roderick Strong b. Bobby Roode – End of Heartache


    Impact Wrestling
    Date: August 31, 2017
    Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
    Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

    It’s officially the Eli Drake Era here and that means the talking is going to get a lot better. Last week Drake became the new World Champion by outlasting most of the roster in Gauntlet for the Gold. Now it’s time to get ready for Bound For Glory and that means starting to set up a card, though they have some time to work with for a change. Let’s get to it.

    Chris Adonis and Eli Drake arrive.

    In the far more important story though, American Top Team arrives with owner Dan Lambert telling Jeff Jarrett that he doesn’t want any peace with him.

    Here are Drake and Adonis for a chat in front of a big zebra print couch. Drake has worked hard for fourteen years and now he has this title. It actually makes him mad because it should have been so much faster. Earlier today, he was at the pool and wound up having a rather nice afternoon with a cougar featuring some nice plastic. He didn’t get much rest today but now he’s here to say that Drake being champion is just a fact of life, no matter who you are.

    Cue Johnny Impact to say he’s had more names than Drake has won titles and knows what it takes to become a champion. This brings out Eddie Edwards to say he’s been around here a long time and that means he’s above Johnny on the totem pole. They both want shots and Johnny is willing to fight to earn his.

    Cue Jim Cornette to make a tag match between the four of them for tonight. If Drake gets the pinfall, he doesn’t have to defend against any of them. If any of the other three gets the fall though, they get the shot. Of note here: Cornette came out, talked about how hot the title hunt was, made the match and was done in less than 75 seconds. Now that’s how this kind of stuff should be.

    Allie comes up to ask Taryn Terrell why she was so mean to Gail Kim. Taryn: “You re so f’ing annoying!” Allie gets punched in the face and slammed into a wall with Taryn saying to make sure Gail gets the message.

    Mario Bokara/Fallah Bahh vs. OVE

    Bokara gets caught in the wrong corner and a swinging neckbreaker gives Jake two. We see LAX watching from their clubhouse. Bahh comes in and runs Jake over but misses the legdrop, leaving Mario to take a double kick in the corner. Dave comes in for a Doomsday Device with a cutter instead of a clothesline for the pin on Bokara at 2:52. Another squash.

    Moose is in Cornette’s office where Jim tells him that he’ll be on TripleMania in Mexico (which has already taken place), along with Lashley, who is looking for him. Ethan Carter III comes in to ask why he’s not on TripleMania but Cornette says he’s got a Grand Championship defense. Ethan: “I didn’t know about that.” Cornette: “Oh you didn’t know?” Ethan: “No I didn’t know.” Cornette and Moose: “Your A** BETTER CALL SOMEBODY!”

    Caleb Konley vs. Petey Williams

    This is Petey’s first singles match on the show in eight years. Don’t care? Well neither do I, but they’ve mentioned it three times now so it must be a big deal. Konley has Trevor Lee with him. Petey headscissors him over a few times but gets distracted by Trevor, allowing Konley to legsweep him down.

    Petey gets beaten down and sent hard into the corner for two. A Russian legsweep into a crucifix gives Petey two and he avoids a moonsault for good measure. Lee gets on the apron to break up the Canadian Destroyer though, sending Petey over the top for a slingshot hurricanrana to take Trevor down. A slingshot Codebreaker sets up the Destroyer to give Petey the pin at 5:54.

    Sonjay Dutt saves Petey from a post-match beatdown.

    Richard Justice has a match tonight.

    Karen Jarrett yells at Taryn for attacking Allie and makes Taryn/Sienna vs. Allie/Gail. She might even throw in some stipulations when we get to the match. Karen is just so forced in this role.

    Richard Justice vs. Kongo Kong

    The top rope splash ends Justice at 51 seconds.

    Mahabali Shera comes out to save Justice from a post match beating.

    Johnny Impact is ready to take Eli Drake’s gravy train to Slam Town.

    Konnan tells Low Ki to send James Storm to the hospital.

    James Storm vs. Low Ki

    This is Storm’s first match since Slammiversary. Ki knocks him into the ropes to start so LAX can get in some cheap shots from the floor. Some right hands in the corner set up the same result and it’s off to a seated abdominal stretch on Storm. James fights up with a running enziguri and a running neckbreaker.

    The Eye of the Storm is countered so Storm tries a catapult, only to get caught with a middle rope Warrior’s Way for two. A second attempt at the Eye of the Storm doesn’t work either but Ki misses the real Warrior’s Way. Now the Eye of the Storm gets two but LAX offers a distraction. The Last Call looks to finish Ki, only to have Santana come in with a belt shot. Ki adds the Warrior’s Way for the pin at 9:20.

    Allie is telling Braxton Sutter about what happened when Garza Jr. comes up to check on her. Sutter doesn’t like it and tells him to get out.

    Jim Cornette recaps the Lashley/American Top Team stuff, which is mainly a way to show Karen screeching a lot.

    Pagano is coming.

    Joseph Park goes over Grado and Laurel Van Ness’ wedding checklist. Park’s uncle Tobias is going to be DJ and he’s one of the best in Sheboygan, Wisconsin. Laurel’s family is coming down from Canada and Park panics. It’s about time they got to that detail.

    Taya Valkyrie is coming.

    Lashley hasn’t made a decision on his future yet but he’s ready to go to TripleMania and clean house.

    Eli Drake/Chris Adonis vs. Johnny Impact/Eddie Edwards

    If Johnny or Eddie get the pin, they’re #1 contender. I’m going to assume there’s something else after this as the bell rang at 9:30. Eddie chops Adonis to start before it’s off to Johnny for a headlock. Drake comes in and runs from an Impact kick to the face. Instead it’s back to Adonis who eats a standing shooting star for two.

    Everything breaks down and the Shot of Caffeine drops Drake, followed by a running corkscrew dive to drop Adonis as we take a break. Back with Johnny’s breakdancing legdrop getting two on Drake. Impact gets taken into the wrong corner for a beating as the announcers keep name dropping MMA fighters. Not only do most of them not mean anything to me as a casual MMA fan, but if I wanted to watch MMA, I’d be watching that instead.

    A double suplex gets two on Impact but he kicks Eli away for the hot tag to Eddie. Some chops and a Blue Thunder Bomb get two on Adonis and we take a break. Back with Adonis grabbing an abdominal stretch on Eddie with some bonus forearms to the ribs. Eddie fights out and brings in Impact to speed things up. Adonis saves Drake from the split legged moonsault and it’s a double Moonlight Drive for two on Drake. Eli throws him into a bearhug from Adonis before forearming Edwards off the apron.

    The match just keeps going as Eddie saves Impact from taking another double suplex. Everything breaks down and the Flying Chuck sets up kind of a cartwheel 450 (with the fans counting him down) for another near fall as Adonis makes the save. Eddie dives onto Adonis and Drake for no cover but Eli gets in a low blow to set up the Gravy Train (Eli Drop/White Noise) for the pin at 26:00.

    Post match American Top Team comes out to say these four should be scared to death right now. Cornette comes out and tells Lashley to tell Lambert under control before he goes to TripleMania. That’s not all though as Cornette makes Drake vs. Matt Sydal next week for the title. Matt comes out to stare at Drake to end the show.

    OVE b. Mario Bokara/Fallah Bahh – Top rope cutter to Bokara
    Petey Williams b. Caleb Konley – Canadian Destroyer
    Kongo Kong b. Richard Justice – Top rope splash
    Low Ki b. James Storm – Warrior’s Way
    Eli Drake/Chris Adonis b. Eddie Edwards/Johnny Impact – Gravy Train to Edwards







    Quick Results

    Monday Night Raw
    Jeff Hardy won a battle royal last eliminating Jason Jordan
    Enzo Amore b. Noam Dar – Eat Defeat
    Cesaro b. Seth Rollins – European uppercut
    Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus – Dirty Deeds
    Emma b. Mickie James – Rollup
    Roman Reigns/John Cena b. Anderson and Gallows – Spear to Anderson
    Alexa Bliss b. Sasha Banks – DDT

    Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin b. Ascension – Paydirt to Viktor
    AJ Styles b. Tye Dillinger – Calf Crusher
    Bobby Roode b. Mike Kanellis – Glorious DDT
    Aiden English b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb from Kevin Owens
    Tamina b. Tina Stock – Superkick
    Randy Orton/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal/Rusev – Kinshasa to Rusev

    Peyton Royce b. Ruby Riot – Fisherman’s suplex
    Heavy Machinery b. Edwin Nagrom/Damien Awheel
    Roderick Strong b. Bobby Roode – End of Heartache

    Impact Wrestling
    OVE b. Mario Bokara/Fallah Bahh – Top rope cutter to Bokara
    Petey Williams b. Caleb Konley – Canadian Destroyer
    Kongo Kong b. Richard Justice – Top rope splash
    Low Ki b. James Storm – Warrior’s Way
    Eli Drake/Chris Adonis b. Eddie Edwards/Johnny Impact – Gravy Train to Edwards

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