CrunKSinatrA
Pre-Show Stalwart
I'm not a big fan of the cheesy action movies and lame comedies that WWE films make. In addition to writing bad promos, I guess the WWE writers also get paid to write bad movies.
Here are some ideas that I think would help improve the upcoming films...
Shawn Michaels in Roadhouse
I've read Rhonda Rousey is already remaking Roadhouse, but a Shawn Michaels version would be way better.
He can be a bouncer while having fun doing his boy toy dance with the ladies. Think Coyote Ugly but with 100% more HBK. Then he superkicks troublemakers the hell out his bar.
But then an American Badass Undertaker and his biker gang start trouble in his bar. And the rest writes itself.
WWE vs Aliens/Robots
I just think it would be fun to see John Cena give a robot an Attitude Adjustment and have it explode into gears and oil.
The robots could crumple in half when Rusev puts them in a camel clutch.
Undertaker, Kane, and Bray Wyatt could take out the mothership/robot factory with their lightning and pyro powers.
HHH goes full heel by joining the aliens/robots and the faces have to fight a cyborg HHH.
At the end, the WWE is escaping in a plane but HHH is about to self destruct in an atomic blast. But Zack Ryder sacrifices himself and takes HHH out with a Ruff Ryder off the plane. Ryder rides the atomic bomb/HHH to the ground a la Dr. Strangelove.
Andre the Giant biopic
First of all, I know that casting would be impossible. Even if they found a good actor, the amount of prosthetics needed to make a normal human being look like Andre would be offensive.
That's why it NEEDS to be a Pixar collaboration. Andre not fitting in with society and finding a place within the wacky world of professional wrestling is totally a Pixar movie.
It'll start off with Andre growing up in France and end with Wrestlemania 3.
I understand a lot of people want to protect the professional wrestling industry, but watching the behind the scenes of Star Wars and Lord of the Rings doesn't ruin the magic. Therefore, Pixar using the behind scenes events to build the drama won't hurt the industry.
Can you imagine what Pixar could do with the Iron Sheik and Ultimate Warrior? Or a young Rock running around with his dad?
One problem I can imagine is how to handle Andre's non-relationship with his daughter. I understand that he supported her financially but he was not interested in being a father.
Also, merchandise licensing will probably prevent this from ever happening.
The Rock vs Stone Cold
This match up headlined Wrestlemania 3 times and needs a cinematic treatment. And I don't mean re-enacting their matches.
They reprise the same characters that made them stars and they fight in a new story on the big screen.
The plot can about about how The Rock is an arrogant Hollywood big shot and is buying some property in Texas to build his dream mansion.
But now Stone Cold is going to losing his favorite hunting spot. Shenanigans ensue with Stone Cold on ATVs and driving a beer truck to The Rock's chagrin. Culminating with a big fight on a waterfall or on top of Dallas skyscraper that will put the Peter Griffin/Giant Chicken fights to shame.
Honestly, this could totally be an entire franchise.
Here are some ideas that I think would help improve the upcoming films...
Shawn Michaels in Roadhouse
I've read Rhonda Rousey is already remaking Roadhouse, but a Shawn Michaels version would be way better.
He can be a bouncer while having fun doing his boy toy dance with the ladies. Think Coyote Ugly but with 100% more HBK. Then he superkicks troublemakers the hell out his bar.
But then an American Badass Undertaker and his biker gang start trouble in his bar. And the rest writes itself.
WWE vs Aliens/Robots
I just think it would be fun to see John Cena give a robot an Attitude Adjustment and have it explode into gears and oil.
The robots could crumple in half when Rusev puts them in a camel clutch.
Undertaker, Kane, and Bray Wyatt could take out the mothership/robot factory with their lightning and pyro powers.
HHH goes full heel by joining the aliens/robots and the faces have to fight a cyborg HHH.
At the end, the WWE is escaping in a plane but HHH is about to self destruct in an atomic blast. But Zack Ryder sacrifices himself and takes HHH out with a Ruff Ryder off the plane. Ryder rides the atomic bomb/HHH to the ground a la Dr. Strangelove.
Andre the Giant biopic
First of all, I know that casting would be impossible. Even if they found a good actor, the amount of prosthetics needed to make a normal human being look like Andre would be offensive.
That's why it NEEDS to be a Pixar collaboration. Andre not fitting in with society and finding a place within the wacky world of professional wrestling is totally a Pixar movie.
It'll start off with Andre growing up in France and end with Wrestlemania 3.
I understand a lot of people want to protect the professional wrestling industry, but watching the behind the scenes of Star Wars and Lord of the Rings doesn't ruin the magic. Therefore, Pixar using the behind scenes events to build the drama won't hurt the industry.
Can you imagine what Pixar could do with the Iron Sheik and Ultimate Warrior? Or a young Rock running around with his dad?
One problem I can imagine is how to handle Andre's non-relationship with his daughter. I understand that he supported her financially but he was not interested in being a father.
Also, merchandise licensing will probably prevent this from ever happening.
The Rock vs Stone Cold
This match up headlined Wrestlemania 3 times and needs a cinematic treatment. And I don't mean re-enacting their matches.
They reprise the same characters that made them stars and they fight in a new story on the big screen.
The plot can about about how The Rock is an arrogant Hollywood big shot and is buying some property in Texas to build his dream mansion.
But now Stone Cold is going to losing his favorite hunting spot. Shenanigans ensue with Stone Cold on ATVs and driving a beer truck to The Rock's chagrin. Culminating with a big fight on a waterfall or on top of Dallas skyscraper that will put the Peter Griffin/Giant Chicken fights to shame.
Honestly, this could totally be an entire franchise.
