klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: July 30, 2018
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman
You can tell it’s a big night around here as Brock Lesnar is actually gracing us with his presence for the first time in three months. Now a lot of people would find that to be a really bad idea but it’s been the case for a long time in WWE. Just to make it work even better, he’ll be confronting Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.
In memory of Nikolai Volkoff and Brian Christopher.
We open with a recap of Reigns beating Bobby Lashley last week to become #1 contender.
Lesnar is here. The fact that that is newsworthy tells you a lot about WWE today.
Here’s Reigns in the arena to a mixed reaction. He thanks the fans in Miami for always having a special energy that you don’t get everywhere else. Reigns thanks Lashley for last week because that was a heck of a fight and he respects Lashley for it. He doesn’t respect Lesnar though because Lesnar doesn’t have time to show up here like he does in the UFC. Lesnar is coming to Summerslam and Reigns is going to hit him in the mouth.
This brings out Paul Heyman, to talk about the definition of insanity being trying the same thing over and over again and expecting the same result. If that’s true, Reigns should be in a padded room somewhere. This week’s spoiler: Heyman is going to put Reigns down and then become a two sport champion.
Reigns: “Just shut up Paul.” He wants Lesnar out here right now but Heyman says Lesnar will be out here if and when he feels like it. Lesnar will be at Summerslam but Reigns cuts him off, saying if Lesnar shows up he’ll be sent back to the UFC as Reigns’ b****. Cole says the show is in three weeks, annoying me as usual. It’s twenty days, not three weeks.
Brock is in the back reading Backwoodsman Magazine when Heyman comes in. He doesn’t watch the show so he didn’t hear what Reigns said. Heyman recorded Reigns’ statements but Lesnar throws the phone against the wall and continues reading. I hope Heyman bills him for that.
Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin
Yes this is still going. Corbin powers him into the corner to start and shoulders Balor down as it’s one sided to start. A middle rope dropkick gets Balor out of trouble as we’re firmly in power vs. speed here. Corbin clotheslines the heck out of him though and we take a break. Back with Corbin grabbing a chinlock and shaking the heck out of Balor.
That’s broken up but Corbin does his slide underneath the ropes for the clothesline back inside. The slow beating continues (makes sense as Corbin doesn’t see Balor as a threat) and it’s off to a chinlock. One heck of a right hand drops Balor again and a weak CORBIN SUCKS chant starts up. Balor sweeps the leg and hits a double stomp, followed by an enziguri to put Corbin on the floor. The big flip dive drops him again and we take a second break.
Back again with Balor holding a chinlock, just in case you didn’t get the point the first time. The chokeslam is countered into a rollup and the Sling Blade rocks Corbin. Balor’s shotgun dropkick gets caught in a chokebreaker and Corbin hammers away, showing his first anger and aggression over eighteen minutes in. A very spinny Deep Six gets two and Balor rolls to the floor where he hits the shotgun dropkick against the ropes. Back in and the Coup de Grace misses, setting up the End of Days to give Corbin the pin at 20:14(!).
Kurt Angle yells at Heyman about Lesnar not appearing in front of the live crowd. If Angle wants to fix things, he can go do it himself. That’s not cool with Angle, who threatens to fire Heyman if Lesnar doesn’t go to the ring at some point.
Long video on the Evolution announcement last week. My goodness please don’t let them do this for three months.
Alexa Bliss comes up to Alicia Fox in the back and wants her to take tonight’s match against Natalya seriously. Ronda Rousey’s suspension is done and she’s going to be in Natalya’s corner tonight. Fox needs to worry about Natalya and Natalya alone but Fox has this. Tonight, she’s going to make Natalya’s cat say meow.
Alicia Fox vs. Natalya
Bliss and Rousey are the seconds. Natalya goes aggressive to start and tries an early Sharpshooter but Fox gets to the floor and pulls Natalya into the ring skirt. After beating the heck out of a tied up Natalya, Fox grabs the chinlock inside. That goes as long as you might expect but an abdominal stretch lasts a lot longer. Fox even one ups it by jumping up and wrapping her legs around Natalya’s waist (that’s a new one). The bridging northern lights suplex gets two and Fox goes after Rousey, allowing Bliss to get in a cheap shot. Fox’s running big boot is good for the pin at 5:05.
Post match Rousey goes after Fox and hits the spinning Samoan drop. The numbers get the better of her for a bit but the villains get chased off.
Heyman is trying to get Lesnar (now reading American Frontiersman) to go to the arena but the offer of a hero’s welcome doesn’t do much for Brock. Lesnar says Heyman is getting under his skin so go get him a steak (medium well), baked potato and steamed broccoli. Make that medium rare and you have a heck of a meal.
Rousey is furious and wants a match before Summerslam or she’ll get suspended again. Angle gives her Fox next week.
Here’s Elias for a song. After a little guitar, Elias puts over his album and says he could have gone even higher on the charts but he was interrupted by Bobby Lashley. The fans start to cheer but Elias doesn’t want to hear from people who worship musicians like Pitbull and actors like the Rock. That brings on a ROCKY chant and Elias isn’t happy.
Elias has a song about how much he can’t stand the Rock but here’s Lashley to interrupt. That’s fine with Elias, because Lashley must want to sing with him. Elias starts playing Rockin’ Robin and Lashley joins in. Shockingly enough he can’t sing and Elias beats him down. A belly to belly sends Elias flying in short order.
Kevin Owens approves of what Corbin did and says Corbin is his son’s new favorite wrestler. Owens is concerned about the Lesnar situation because Brock is insulting Stephanie McMahon’s authority. If Brock goes out there, Strowman could cash in the briefcase before Owens has a chance to win it in the match Stephanie made. Corbin says that’s not his problem and Braun can cash in anytime.
We look back at Braun Strowman destroying Jinder Mahal last week.
Braun Strowman vs. Jinder Mahal
Jinder’s shanti is cut off by a GET THESE HANDS chant and a shove into the corner. Cue Kevin Owens to grab the briefcase and the chase is on with Strowman getting the case back and chasing Owens up the ramp for the countout at 1:36.
Strowman comes back and chases Mahal off.
Corbin brings Angle the phone so he can talk to Stephanie. She has an idea, even though Angle thinks the fans will be disappointed. Stephanie doesn’t care because we need to protect the main event of Summerslam.
A bunch of midcarders are in the locker room when Mojo Rawley comes in. He calls all of them out for not believing in his, just like everyone else he’s run down. Bobby Roode comes in with a slow clap so Mojo asks if he’s about to be catchphrased into submission. The fight is on with agents and referees coming in to break it up while the wrestlers want more brawling.
Apollo Crews vs. Akam
Before the match, the Authors promise to destroy everyone. Akam powers him down and puts n a very early cobra clutch. Crews fight up with a series of kicks to the head and the standing moonsault for two. The toss powerbomb doesn’t work but Akam misses a charge into the corner and gets rolled up for the pin at 2:57.
Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre
Dolph Ziggler is in Drew’s corner. The announcers are pushing the nickname Scottish Terminator for McIntyre. An early suplex muscles Rollins up and McIntyre sends him outside. A catapult sends Rollins throat first into the metal ring structure and we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting back to back to back suicide dives to send McIntyre into the barricade. I know McIntyre is called the Terminator but Rollins seems to have a throat of steel.
McIntyre is fine enough to get two off a spinebuster but a powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana. Rollins superkicks him and McIntyre wants another, so Seth grants the request. It’s not enough to keep McIntyre down for the frog splash and super White Noise gives McIntyre two. If you’re going to use a move like that, it should be a pin. Rollins gets out of the Alabama Slam and hits the Stomp, drawing in Ziggler for the DQ at 9:22.
We recap Brock won’t come out and play.
Angle comes in to tell Reigns that since Lesnar will be in the arena tonight, Reigns needs to leave the building on Stephanie’s orders. Reigns asks when this is going to end because Angle isn’t a yes man. Corbin brings in security to escort Reigns from the building so Reigns pops him in the jaw.
Here’s the B Team for a chat. Charly Caruso asks about their change over the summer and the success it has brought them. Dallas: “Well Charles, the B in B Team stands for dream!” They’ve gotten the support from the B Teamers (dang it I like that) but the Deleters of Worlds don’t think much of them.
Here they are behind the champs with Matt Hardy saying this success is a cosmic anomaly. Bray talks about how dreams are fleeting but nightmares are real. They will never stop haunting the B Team but here’s the Revival to interrupt. Dawson says they’re the top of the division and a brawl breaks out with the Revival being cleared out in short order.
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt vs. Revival
Joined in progress with the B Team on commentary and Bray doing the spider walk to Wilder. Matt comes in and gets pulled into a Boston crab with Dawson dropping a bunch of legs. The champs talk about not sleeping since winning the titles, what the B stands for, and not being scared of the Revival. Revival takes turns on the commentary as Dallas expresses his disdain for fists and flips.
A Side Effect gets Matt out of trouble and it’s off to Bray vs. Wilder again. Bray’s body block takes him down and we get what sounds like a CM PUNK chant. Dawson dropkicks Bray and everything breaks down with Matt and Dawson fighting to the floor. Now it’s a RUSEV DAY chant as Wilder slips out of Sister Abigail. The Shatter Machine ends Bray at 5:54.
Rollins talks about tired of getting jumped 2-1 when he’s jumped 2-1.
Riott Squad vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks
Sasha and Bayley now have matching jackets and want to be called the Boss and Hug Connection. No. Logan starts with an armbar on Bayley, who easily spins her down for a break. Banks comes in for the running Meteora and we hit the armbar. The announcers manage to stop talking about Reigns and Lesnar to talk about Evolution as Bayley hits a running knee in the corner.
Banks adds a Meteora on the apron and we take a break. Back with Banks in a chinlock until Morgan comes in for a chinlock of her own. What a versatile team. Banks gets up and throws her down for the hot tag to Bayley. A running knee to Morgan’s head has her in trouble and there’s the running elbow in the corner. Bayley hurricanranas Morgan down for a top rope Meteora (third of the match) from Banks. Bayley comes in off a blind tag and a Backstabber into the Bayley to Belly finishes Morgan at 8:48.
Heyman begs Lesnar to go out there so they can go be at a private steakhouse in 25 minutes. Lesnar’s pay has been confirmed so he doesn’t seem interested. Heyman finally explains the situation and asks him to do it as a friend. Lesnar grabs him by the jacket and says they’re not friends but just business associates. Therefore, Heyman needs to go out there and do his job.
Here are Angle and Corbin to address Heyman and Lesnar. Heyman does come out with no energy, knowing what’s about to happen. The fans greet him with the Goodbye Song and Heyman says Lesnar isn’t coming out here tonight. That sends Angle over the edge into a rant about what a champion does, like doing charity work, reaching out to the community, and DEFENDING THE TITLE. Angle: “BROCK LESNAR MUST BE THE WORST UNIVERSAL CHAMPION OF ALL TIME!” Fans: “YES!!!”
Heyman actually agrees and says he tried to rehabilitate Lesnar because he’s one of the few people Lesnar tolerates. Kurt doesn’t buy it but Heyman says take this out on Lesnar because Brock doesn’t respect anyone. However, Heyman thinks the world of Angle and would like to have a better working relationship with him. Angle fires him anyway, sending Heyman diving to Angle’s leg.
Cue Lesnar to give Heyman the greatest relief of his life. Lesnar finally gets in and hands the belt to Heyman before grabbing a mic. That’s rarely a good idea. He asks if Angle and Corbin have a problem with him….and there’s an F5 to Angle before a word is said. Corbin immediately leaves and Heyman slaps Brock on the back. Brock grabs him by the face and makes Heyman look at Angle. The fans want Strowman (or maybe Roman) but get Brock leaving to end the show. So yeah, that’s it and no, this isn’t going to get the result that the company wants, especially in New York.
Results
Baron Corbin b. Finn Balor – End of Days
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Big boot
Jinder Mahal b. Braun Strowman via countout
Apollo Crews b. Akam – Rollup
Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when Dolph Ziggler interfered
Revival b. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt – Shatter Machine to Wyatt
Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Riott Squad – Bayley to Belly to Morgan
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: July 31, 2018
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
Most of the blue half of Summerslam is either set up or you can tell where things are going. We still need to get the confirmation of Miz vs. Daniel Bryan and some #1 contenders for the Bludgeon Brothers. You can probably guess where things are going but it’s nice to have things made official. Let’s get to it.
Renee Young brings out Becky Lynch for a chat. Becky knew she would get back to the top of the mountain if she kept fighting. She hasn’t had a title match since Wrestlemania XXXIII nearly a year and a half ago. Now she’s back and just has to beat Carmella again to become Smackdown Women’s Champion again. Becky wants to go into Evolution as the champion but here’s Carmella to interrupt.
Carmella admits that she lost fair and square last week and that scares her. Becky has worked her way to the top and has been there to mentor Carmella every step of the way. She was the first woman to be drafted to Smackdown and Carmella was literally the last person drafted. With some tears in her eyes, Carmella talks about having to block out all the haters who say she’s not worthy of the title.
Now she’s getting to go into the biggest match of her career against her idol and they’re going to kill it. We’ll ignore why Carmella would want to have a great match rather than successfully defend her title but here’s James Ellsworth’s music. The distraction lets Carmella jump Becky from behind (as you knew was coming) and load up a chair. Cue the returning Charlotte for the save.
The Usos are in a dark room and quote Rock (that’s two Rock references in two nights) but one cuts the other off before he can swear.
Carmella comes in to rant to Paige about what happened and says Paige will never be champion again. Paige makes Carmella vs. Charlotte for tonight and if Charlotte wins, it’s a triple threat at Summerslam.
Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Usos vs. The Bar
Hang on though as New Day comes out to sit at a table full of cereal and pancakes. Sheamus and Jimmy start and we take a break before anything can happen. Back with Cesaro holding Jey in a chinlock as New Day is doing their own commentary. A double clothesline sets up a knee drop and it’s off to an armbar from Sheamus. Jey fights up as Big E. eats cereal and leads the cheers.
Sheamus goes shoulder first into the post and the hot tag brings in Jimmy. House is cleaned and a high crossbody gets two but Cesaro sends Jimmy into the post as we take another break. Back again with Jimmy hitting a Whisper in the Wind on Cesaro but not being able to follow up. The superkick into the Superfly Splash gets two with Cesaro making a save, sending New Day into hysterics. Cesaro breaks up half of the Double Us and the second Superfly Splash hits knees, giving Sheamus the pin at 15:05.
Post match New Day comes in for the staredown but the Bar bails.
Charlotte is very happy that Carmella’s big mouth has gotten her this opportunity. She doesn’t care about what has happened between the two of them before because things can change.
We look back at Samoa Joe attacking AJ Styles last week.
Here’s Samoa Joe with a message to AJ. He puts a stool in the ring and talks about how much he respects what AJ has done for the title, making it the most prestigious in WWE (the fans gasped a bit on that). AJ has put the title in front of what he wants and even in front of his own family. Last week AJ came out here and told a story about being able to talk to his daughter about being anything she wants to be.
The truth is that AJ is barely home long enough to hug his child, let alone look her in the eye. AJ is more comfortable living out of a suitcase than being at home with his family. He’s a great champion, even though he’s a failure as a father. Come Summerslam, AJ’s family will be cheering for Joe because it means they’ll have daddy back but Joe will be WWE Champion. This was more great stuff and as usual, it’s not about what Joe is saying but rather the intensity with which he says it. In a word, Joe comes off as real and that’s something most people can’t do in wrestling anymore.
Here’s Jeff Hardy (Wasn’t he supposed to be out with an injury?) to say the US Title is part of his life force. It is his fifth eye and allows him to connect with the WWE Universe. There is nothing more important than beating Shinsuke Nakamura and taking it back. The one thing that comes close is beating up Randy Orton, so get out here right now. As Orton comes out and gets in the ring, Nakamura comes in from behind to jump Hardy. Orton blocks the Kinshasa...before stepping aside so Nakamura can hit it.
Nakamura leaves and Orton loads up the RKO but sweeps both legs instead. The Orton Stomp returns and still looks stupid so Orton switches to regular stomping instead. Orton hits the hanging DDT off the apron and puts Jeff on the announcers’ table for some right hands. He rips off Jeff’s necklace and pours water on Jeff’s unconscious face so he can scrub the paint off with a cloth. Orton: “Enigma erased.” They’re making me want to see more of Orton and I could very easily picture him taking the title from AJ at this rate.
Becky isn’t thrilled with Charlotte possibly being added to the match but she knows she can defeat Carmella one on one. She’ll never root against her best friend.
Lana vs. Zelina Vega
Fallout from last week’s brawl between the two. Vega does Almas’ pose on the mat so Lana does a handstand as we have a pose off. Lana shoves her outside and we take an early break. Back with Vega holding her in a dragon sleeper (at least it’s something different) and getting two off the running knees in the corner. Lana gets in a kick to the ribs and a neckbreaker, followed by some dancing. Her own running knees to Vega’s back get two but Almas offers a distraction. Cue Aiden English to pull Almas down but Vega rolls her up for the pin at 6:00.
The Bludgeon Brothers still don’t care who wins the tournament because no one can escape the bludgeoning.
Aiden begs Lana’s forgiveness but leaves before Rusev arrives. I’m not sure why as Aiden was trying to help. Rusev comes in and says that wouldn’t have happened if he was out there. Lana is mad at him too and says she needed him.
Here’s Daniel Bryan to plug Evolution (this is why I wanted to wait for after Summerslam, as Evolution is getting almost as much if not more attention) because it makes him think of his wife Brie Bella. Brie was in the ring when the Give Divas A Chance campaign started. The two of them have fought for respect for years now but every time they’ve taken a step forward, it’s been two steps back.
We see a clip from last week of Miz throwing the fake baby at Bryan and beating him down. That bothers him because Miz taunted him for two years while hiding behind the wall of Bryan’s injury. But then Bryan was cleared and Miz had to find a new way to hide. Last week Maryse and the baby were the new wall because Miz knows he would get destroyed in a fight.
Miz pops up on screen with security around him. He doesn’t want to hear this from Bryan because we’re not in the indies. If Bryan wants to fight, call Miz’s agent because he’s on the set of Miz and Mrs. right now. Bryan calls him a coward again so Miz brings up the Talking Smack segment from 2016. This right here, the eternal conflict, is all Bryan wants because it’s what furthers Bryan’s career. It took Bryan ten years of fighting on the indies to get noticed but Miz just yelled at Bryan for five minutes and got famous.
Bryan says that’s the difference between the two of them: Bryan is in this for the passion and Miz just wants fame. It’s been done before and better, but Miz is never going to be the Rock or John Cena. If Miz needs a big stage, come fight Bryan at Summerslam. Miz laughs it off and says the YES Movement is dead because everyone has moved on. No one wants to hear from Bryan because all the fans see when they look at him is this, and the screen is filled with pictures of crying babies. More great stuff from these two as there’s a natural chemistry there and I’m fine with waiting on the match announcement, as it’s not like it’s a secret.
Charlotte vs. Carmella
Non-title but if Charlotte wins, the title match at Summerslam is a triple threat. Before the match, Carmella says her fashion sense is just as flawless as her wrestling abilities. Charlotte may not want to admit it but Becky is rooting against her. Carmella moon walks away to start so Charlotte shoulders her down and says all night baby.
A t-bone suplex into a nipup puts Carmella on the floor but Charlotte misses the slingshot dive. Carmella sends her into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Charlotte missing a moonsault and getting sent outside so Carmella can stomp away. Carmella takes her down with a chinlock and things slow a bit.
Charlotte fights up and hits a big boot before sending Carmella outside for a moonsault off the barricade. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two but the Figure Eight attempt is broken up. Carmella’s superkick gets two and she can’t believe all these kickouts. For some reason Carmella tries the Figure Four but gets reversed into the Figure Eight for the tap at 12:46.
Becky is upset in the back to end the show.
Results
The Bar b. Usos – Small package to Jey
Zelina Vega b. Lana – Rollup
Charlotte b. Carmella – Figure Eight
Wednesday
NXT
Date: August 1, 2018
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson, Mauro Ranallo
Last week, evil won. Tommaso Ciampa defeated Aleister Black to become the new NXT Champion, thanks to an accidental belt shot to Black’s head at the hands of Johnny Gargano. That is Gargano’s, as well as a lot of other people’s, worst nightmare and it’s going to make for an interesting future. Let’s get to it.
In Memory Of Nikolai Volkoff and Brian Christopher.
Long recap of last week’s title change. The crowd energy really did make that so much better, as is normally the case around here.
Opening sequence.
Heavy Machinery vs. The Mighty
The Mighty have new black coats and throw them at Heavy Machinery’s faces. Those coats are thrown back at them and followed by right hands before the bell even rings. Otis spins Miller around before planting him with a slam but Thorn is right back with a high dropkick (to a not very high Otis) to take over. A double belly to back suplex gets two and Thorn starts in on the arm.
They switch to the more traditional route with a chinlock, along with the traditional comeback via a belly to back suplex. That’s enough to bring in Knight to throw the Aussies around, followed by a Cannonball off the apron to take them both down. Back in and a chop block cuts Knight off...and we’ve got the Street Profits in the crowd. The Mighty are distracted enough to allow the hot ta to Otis and the Compactor finishes Miller at 5:15.
Moustache Mountain vs. Matt Knotts/???
Bate starts with the bigger Knotts, who mocks the wave. That means one heck of a left hand to Knotts’ jaw and Seven comes in for the chops. The unnamed jobber (Mauro: “His opponent.”
comes in and gets chopped as well, setting up a dragon suplex. Bate’s t-bone suplex drops Opponent and the top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination is good for the pin on Opponent at 2:21. Mountain looked great.
Post match Moustache Mountain apologizes to the fans for losing the titles. Bate apologizes for throwing in the towel but they’re invoking their rematch clause for Takeover: Brooklyn. That’s going to be a VERY interesting crowd reaction.
EC3 vs. Kona Reeves
I don’t have to say this very often around here, but please make it short. Reeves can’t get out of a headlock to start as Nigel actually tries to compare him to Barry Windham. Thankfully EC3 hits a good looking elbow to make me forget about how ridiculous that statement was.
A cobra clutch (the Kona Clutch) has EC3 in trouble for all of a few moments before coming back up with left hands. EC3’s running flip neckbreaker but here’s the Velveteen Dream (DON’T START DOING THIS NXT!) who says someone still can’t get over Royal Albert Hall. Dream points behind EC3 and the Hawaiian Drop gives Reeves two. Reeves yells a lot and the One Percent finishes him off at 5:32.
In the back, EC3 says he’d love to join Dream’s experience because he knows it’s going to turn into a fight. He is the best here, he is the best there, he is the best anywhere.
Shayna Baszler vs. Candice LeRae
Non-title. Baszler offers LeRae a chance to leave and gets dropkicked for her efforts. LeRae goes for the arm but gets tossed outside, setting up a whip into the steps. That means Baszler can start in on the arm, bending it all over the place and stomping on it to bend it in rather painful directions. An enziguri gives LeRae a bit of relief and she takes Baszler down with a one armed snapmare.
Baszler staggers up and walks into a spinning middle rope Downward Spiral for one. A suicide dive has Baszler in even more trouble and the jumping tornado DDT gets two. Ms. LeRae’s Wild Ride is pulled down into the Kirifuda Clutch (the same way Baszler beat her in the Mae Young Classic) but this time LeRae grabs the rope. An Unprettier sets up a Lionsault but LeRae only hits mat. Baszler kicks her in the arm and the Clutch is good for the tap at 7:57.
Baszler goes after her again after the match but Kairi Sane makes the save. Sane checks on LeRae and Baszler kicks at her again, meaning referees have to hold Sane back as Baszler leaves.
Moustache Mountain is ready to beat the Undisputed Era again. They run into the War Raiders, who says they’re coming for whoever leaves Brooklyn with the titles.
Regal makes EC3 vs. Dream and Adam Cole vs. Ricochet for the North American Championship for Brooklyn.
Next week: Ricochet is back and Keith Lee makes his in-ring debut.
Here’s Ciampa for his first comments as champion. Mauro says Ciampa makes Thanos look like the Wizard of Oz. Now that’s a great line. Ciampa is reveling in being the champion and points at individual fans, laughing about his win and saying he told us so. Once he’s in the ring, Ciampa says he and the title make a beautiful couple. He’s a man of his word and won’t be listening to the fans telling him to shut up.
This is what happens when the most dangerous man in NXT takes his place at the head of the table. The fans chant at him even more so Ciampa complains about how heavy the title is on his shoulder. The icing on the cake was Gargano proving himself to be a failure because Ciampa won again. Ciampa was the magic answer to Black and now Black and Gargano can bicker about who is 2A and 2B. It doesn’t really matter because the gap between 1 and 2 has never been stronger. NXT will forever be the A show because he is the greatest sports entertainer (erg) of all time.
Ciampa sits in the ring and here’s Black to interrupt. Gargano sprints past him though and the fight is on with Ciampa being knocked to the floor. The champ bails through the crowd (that can’t be safe) and Gargano says he’s the reason Ciampa is champion. Black superkicks Gargano and the fans think Gargano deserved it. Well yeah he pretty much did. Black agrees with Gargano being to blame to end the show.
Results
Heavy Machinery b. The Mighty – Compactor to Miller
Moustache Mountain b. Matt Knotts/??? – Top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination to ???
EC3 b. Kona Reeves – One Percent
Shayna Baszler b. Candice LeRae – Kirifuda Clutch
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: August 2, 2018
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis
Things are still fresh off of Slammiversary but at the same time we don’t really have anything big going on yet. Austin Aries’ next challenger seems to be Eddie Edwards, but I’d assume that’s more of a one off TV match than a major pay per view story. Still though, there’s enough interesting stuff going on around here to keep me entertained. Let’s get to it.
The opening video looks at Aries retaining at Slammiversary but getting jumped by Eddie. Johnny Impact, Brian Cage, Pentagon Jr. and Sami Callihan get some attention as well.
Opening sequence.
Su Yung/Undead Bridesmaid vs. Kiera Hogan/Allie
Allie and Kiera slug their way through the read of the Bridesmaids with Kiera diving onto one of them and Allie diving onto the rest. Yung gets caught inside for a double teaming but Allie gets takes into the corner as the Bridesmaid comes back in. It’s Kiera getting beaten up in the corner with Yung coming in to hammer away with wild rights and lefts.
Kiera kicks the Bridesmaid away and hits a dropkick, allowing the hot tag off to Allie. The Codebreaker is blocked so it’s the Best Superkick Ever for two on Yung instead. Everything breaks down and a fisherman’s neckbreaker drops the Bridesmaid. The Panic Switch sends Kiera outside but the Codebreaker gives Allie the pin at 6:10.
Post match Tessa Blanchard comes in and takes Allie out with a hammerlock DDT.
Post break Tessa mocks Alie for wanting to save everyone when she can’t even help herself. Allie is only in this for herself and isn’t getting a Knockouts Title shot before Tessa.
Aries vs. Edwards in a title match is set for next week.
OGz vs. ???/???
Hernandez throws one across the ring and Homicide hits the Gringo Killer on the other one (in a SICK landing) for the pin at 50 seconds.
Post match, King says he told us so by getting rid of Konnan and the young boys and taking their titles. Cue LAX for the brawl as Konnan watches from the ramp. Ortiz pulls out A HATCHET but security and Konnan break it up. It being the attempted murder/butchering that is.
Post break Konnan says that was a trap and they’ll get their revenge when the time is right.
Classic clip: Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Petey Williams from Sacrifice 2006.
Sami Callihan, still with a bad arm, and OVE are ticked off but tonight they’ll make up for it by beating up the Lucha Brothers.
Desi Hit Squad vs. KM/Fallah Bahh
Bahh pounds his chest to start so the Squad tries some double teaming. I say try because Bahh whips them both in for a double crossbody and the Squad is flattened. The big fat leg connects and it’s off to KM for….well nothing of note before Bahh comes in again. This time he spends too long going after Gama though and a chop block brings him down.
Raju comes in for some kicks to the ribs but Bahh crushes him in the corner. That’s enough for the tag back to KM so house can be cleaned. The double roll over has the Squad in more trouble and some pokes to the eye make them scream. KM hits a full nelson slam but Bahh won’t leave, allowing Raju to hit a jumping knee to the face. Singh adds a jumping Downward Spiral for the pin at 6:13.
Anthony Carelli gives his student Dustin Cameron a pep talk before the match with Aries tonight. Cameron leaves and Carelli prays that he doesn’t die out there.
Johnny Impact wants his rematch with Kongo Kong but gets Jimmy Jacobs instead. Before Jimmy can say much, a right hand takes him down.
Impact Wrestling World Title: Austin Aries vs. Dustin Cameron
Aries is defending, eating a banana and wearing street clothes. Cameron gets taken down with ease, followed by a headlock takeover and a walk on his back. Some judo tosses give Cameron his only offense but there’s a discus forearm into the brainbuster for two, with Aries picking him up. Carelli throws in the towel at 3:29.
Post match Aries puts on the Last Chancery, drawing Carelli in. The fans chant for the Cobra but settle for a low blow to Ari-es instead. Eddie Edwards comes in for a kendo stick shot to send Aries running.
Alisha Edwards says she’s getting back in the ring when Eddie comes in to say things are going to be back to normal. He’s going to be World Champion again! That’s too much for Alisha and she leaves. Eddie: “Ok bye.”
Here’s Scarlett Bordeaux for a chat in the aisle. The interviewer can barely talk because he’s too busy staring at her and the stuttering is intense. Scarlett flirts with him (after naming him Bobo due to his stuttering) and says she won’t be hot shamed. He leaves and she dances a bit because the Smoke Show is here. I still need to see more of this but I don’t hate it.
Grado comes up to Eli Drake to yell about the gift from last week. A challenge for a tag match is thrown out and Drake steps to the side to grab Trevor Lee as his partner.
Grado/Joe Hendry vs. Eli Drake/Trevor Lee
The villains, including Caleb Konley, send Hendry outside and triple team Grado before Drake starts with the latter. A knee and basement clothesline have Grado in more trouble and Drake shouts to the crowd a lot. Grado is right back with his clothesline and the snap jabs but Lee pulls Hendry off the apron. The distraction lets Drake hit the Gravy Train for the easy pin at 3:12.
Post match Hendry and Grado hug it out.
The Desi Hit Squad is pleased with themselves but Gama Singh comes in to slap them in the face.
Video on Brian Cage retaining the X-Division Title last week in a good match.
Sydal admits that Cage is the better man but he’ll be looking inside of himself and questioning everything.
OVE vs. Fenix/Pentagon Jr.
They start fast and take turns running at each other until the Lucha Bros slide to the floor and take stereo suicide dives into the barricade. OVE beats them up a little more with Pentagon going into the post, only to come back with stereo superkicks. Now it’s a pair of flip dives to take out the Crists as we take a break. Back with Pentagon opening Dave’s shirt for a skin ripping chop.
Fenix launches Pentagon into Jake in the corner but Sami saves him from the spike Fear Factor. Some kicks to the head sent Pentagon outside, leaving Jake to put on something like a reverse Rings of Saturn (Naomi used to use it) on Fenix. Jake and Dave take turns going for the mask until Fenix kicks Jake in the head. Pentagon comes in but the Crists tie their masks together so the Lucha Bros are in even more trouble.
The masks come untied and Jake spikes Fenix for two. Pentagon gets back up though and it’s time for some corner clotheslines, followed by stereo superkicks on Jake. Fenix hits a top rope double stomp to Jake’s back, leaving Dave to take the spike Fear Factor. A flip dive takes out Jake and Sami as Dave is pinned at 17:23.
Killer Kross talks about realizing you’re in your final moments. The camera pans down to show an unconscious Carelli to end the show. That feels like writing him off TV, and that’s for the best.
Results
Allie/Kiera Hogan b. Undead Bridesmaid/Su Yung – Codebreaker to Yung
OGz b. ???/??? – Gringo Killer to ???
Desi Hit Squad b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Jumping Downward Spiral to KM
Austin Aries b. Dustin Cameron when Anthony Carelli threw in the towel
Eli Drake/Trevor Lee b. Grado/Joe Hendry – Gravy Train to Grado
Fenix/Pentagon Jr. b. OVE – Spike Fear Factor to Dave Crist
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Baron Corbin b. Finn Balor – End of Days
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Big boot
Jinder Mahal b. Braun Strowman via countout
Apollo Crews b. Akam – Rollup
Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when Dolph Ziggler interfered
Revival b. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt – Shatter Machine to Wyatt
Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Riott Squad – Bayley to Belly to Morgan
Smackdown
The Bar b. Usos – Small package to Jey
Zelina Vega b. Lana – Rollup
Charlotte b. Carmella – Figure Eight
NXT
Heavy Machinery b. The Mighty – Compactor to Miller
Moustache Mountain b. Matt Knotts/??? – Top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination to ???
EC3 b. Kona Reeves – One Percent
Shayna Baszler b. Candice LeRae – Kirifuda Clutch
Impact Wrestling
Allie/Kiera Hogan b. Undead Bridesmaid/Su Yung – Codebreaker to Yung
OGz b. ???/??? – Gringo Killer to ???
Desi Hit Squad b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Jumping Downward Spiral to KM
Austin Aries b. Dustin Cameron when Anthony Carelli threw in the towel
Eli Drake/Trevor Lee b. Grado/Joe Hendry – Gravy Train to Grado
Fenix/Pentagon Jr. b. OVE – Spike Fear Factor to Dave Crist
Monday Night Raw
Date: July 30, 2018
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman
You can tell it’s a big night around here as Brock Lesnar is actually gracing us with his presence for the first time in three months. Now a lot of people would find that to be a really bad idea but it’s been the case for a long time in WWE. Just to make it work even better, he’ll be confronting Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.
In memory of Nikolai Volkoff and Brian Christopher.
We open with a recap of Reigns beating Bobby Lashley last week to become #1 contender.
Lesnar is here. The fact that that is newsworthy tells you a lot about WWE today.
Here’s Reigns in the arena to a mixed reaction. He thanks the fans in Miami for always having a special energy that you don’t get everywhere else. Reigns thanks Lashley for last week because that was a heck of a fight and he respects Lashley for it. He doesn’t respect Lesnar though because Lesnar doesn’t have time to show up here like he does in the UFC. Lesnar is coming to Summerslam and Reigns is going to hit him in the mouth.
This brings out Paul Heyman, to talk about the definition of insanity being trying the same thing over and over again and expecting the same result. If that’s true, Reigns should be in a padded room somewhere. This week’s spoiler: Heyman is going to put Reigns down and then become a two sport champion.
Reigns: “Just shut up Paul.” He wants Lesnar out here right now but Heyman says Lesnar will be out here if and when he feels like it. Lesnar will be at Summerslam but Reigns cuts him off, saying if Lesnar shows up he’ll be sent back to the UFC as Reigns’ b****. Cole says the show is in three weeks, annoying me as usual. It’s twenty days, not three weeks.
Brock is in the back reading Backwoodsman Magazine when Heyman comes in. He doesn’t watch the show so he didn’t hear what Reigns said. Heyman recorded Reigns’ statements but Lesnar throws the phone against the wall and continues reading. I hope Heyman bills him for that.
Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin
Yes this is still going. Corbin powers him into the corner to start and shoulders Balor down as it’s one sided to start. A middle rope dropkick gets Balor out of trouble as we’re firmly in power vs. speed here. Corbin clotheslines the heck out of him though and we take a break. Back with Corbin grabbing a chinlock and shaking the heck out of Balor.
That’s broken up but Corbin does his slide underneath the ropes for the clothesline back inside. The slow beating continues (makes sense as Corbin doesn’t see Balor as a threat) and it’s off to a chinlock. One heck of a right hand drops Balor again and a weak CORBIN SUCKS chant starts up. Balor sweeps the leg and hits a double stomp, followed by an enziguri to put Corbin on the floor. The big flip dive drops him again and we take a second break.
Back again with Balor holding a chinlock, just in case you didn’t get the point the first time. The chokeslam is countered into a rollup and the Sling Blade rocks Corbin. Balor’s shotgun dropkick gets caught in a chokebreaker and Corbin hammers away, showing his first anger and aggression over eighteen minutes in. A very spinny Deep Six gets two and Balor rolls to the floor where he hits the shotgun dropkick against the ropes. Back in and the Coup de Grace misses, setting up the End of Days to give Corbin the pin at 20:14(!).
Kurt Angle yells at Heyman about Lesnar not appearing in front of the live crowd. If Angle wants to fix things, he can go do it himself. That’s not cool with Angle, who threatens to fire Heyman if Lesnar doesn’t go to the ring at some point.
Long video on the Evolution announcement last week. My goodness please don’t let them do this for three months.
Alexa Bliss comes up to Alicia Fox in the back and wants her to take tonight’s match against Natalya seriously. Ronda Rousey’s suspension is done and she’s going to be in Natalya’s corner tonight. Fox needs to worry about Natalya and Natalya alone but Fox has this. Tonight, she’s going to make Natalya’s cat say meow.
Alicia Fox vs. Natalya
Bliss and Rousey are the seconds. Natalya goes aggressive to start and tries an early Sharpshooter but Fox gets to the floor and pulls Natalya into the ring skirt. After beating the heck out of a tied up Natalya, Fox grabs the chinlock inside. That goes as long as you might expect but an abdominal stretch lasts a lot longer. Fox even one ups it by jumping up and wrapping her legs around Natalya’s waist (that’s a new one). The bridging northern lights suplex gets two and Fox goes after Rousey, allowing Bliss to get in a cheap shot. Fox’s running big boot is good for the pin at 5:05.
Post match Rousey goes after Fox and hits the spinning Samoan drop. The numbers get the better of her for a bit but the villains get chased off.
Heyman is trying to get Lesnar (now reading American Frontiersman) to go to the arena but the offer of a hero’s welcome doesn’t do much for Brock. Lesnar says Heyman is getting under his skin so go get him a steak (medium well), baked potato and steamed broccoli. Make that medium rare and you have a heck of a meal.
Rousey is furious and wants a match before Summerslam or she’ll get suspended again. Angle gives her Fox next week.
Here’s Elias for a song. After a little guitar, Elias puts over his album and says he could have gone even higher on the charts but he was interrupted by Bobby Lashley. The fans start to cheer but Elias doesn’t want to hear from people who worship musicians like Pitbull and actors like the Rock. That brings on a ROCKY chant and Elias isn’t happy.
Elias has a song about how much he can’t stand the Rock but here’s Lashley to interrupt. That’s fine with Elias, because Lashley must want to sing with him. Elias starts playing Rockin’ Robin and Lashley joins in. Shockingly enough he can’t sing and Elias beats him down. A belly to belly sends Elias flying in short order.
Kevin Owens approves of what Corbin did and says Corbin is his son’s new favorite wrestler. Owens is concerned about the Lesnar situation because Brock is insulting Stephanie McMahon’s authority. If Brock goes out there, Strowman could cash in the briefcase before Owens has a chance to win it in the match Stephanie made. Corbin says that’s not his problem and Braun can cash in anytime.
We look back at Braun Strowman destroying Jinder Mahal last week.
Braun Strowman vs. Jinder Mahal
Jinder’s shanti is cut off by a GET THESE HANDS chant and a shove into the corner. Cue Kevin Owens to grab the briefcase and the chase is on with Strowman getting the case back and chasing Owens up the ramp for the countout at 1:36.
Strowman comes back and chases Mahal off.
Corbin brings Angle the phone so he can talk to Stephanie. She has an idea, even though Angle thinks the fans will be disappointed. Stephanie doesn’t care because we need to protect the main event of Summerslam.
A bunch of midcarders are in the locker room when Mojo Rawley comes in. He calls all of them out for not believing in his, just like everyone else he’s run down. Bobby Roode comes in with a slow clap so Mojo asks if he’s about to be catchphrased into submission. The fight is on with agents and referees coming in to break it up while the wrestlers want more brawling.
Apollo Crews vs. Akam
Before the match, the Authors promise to destroy everyone. Akam powers him down and puts n a very early cobra clutch. Crews fight up with a series of kicks to the head and the standing moonsault for two. The toss powerbomb doesn’t work but Akam misses a charge into the corner and gets rolled up for the pin at 2:57.
Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre
Dolph Ziggler is in Drew’s corner. The announcers are pushing the nickname Scottish Terminator for McIntyre. An early suplex muscles Rollins up and McIntyre sends him outside. A catapult sends Rollins throat first into the metal ring structure and we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting back to back to back suicide dives to send McIntyre into the barricade. I know McIntyre is called the Terminator but Rollins seems to have a throat of steel.
McIntyre is fine enough to get two off a spinebuster but a powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana. Rollins superkicks him and McIntyre wants another, so Seth grants the request. It’s not enough to keep McIntyre down for the frog splash and super White Noise gives McIntyre two. If you’re going to use a move like that, it should be a pin. Rollins gets out of the Alabama Slam and hits the Stomp, drawing in Ziggler for the DQ at 9:22.
We recap Brock won’t come out and play.
Angle comes in to tell Reigns that since Lesnar will be in the arena tonight, Reigns needs to leave the building on Stephanie’s orders. Reigns asks when this is going to end because Angle isn’t a yes man. Corbin brings in security to escort Reigns from the building so Reigns pops him in the jaw.
Here’s the B Team for a chat. Charly Caruso asks about their change over the summer and the success it has brought them. Dallas: “Well Charles, the B in B Team stands for dream!” They’ve gotten the support from the B Teamers (dang it I like that) but the Deleters of Worlds don’t think much of them.
Here they are behind the champs with Matt Hardy saying this success is a cosmic anomaly. Bray talks about how dreams are fleeting but nightmares are real. They will never stop haunting the B Team but here’s the Revival to interrupt. Dawson says they’re the top of the division and a brawl breaks out with the Revival being cleared out in short order.
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt vs. Revival
Joined in progress with the B Team on commentary and Bray doing the spider walk to Wilder. Matt comes in and gets pulled into a Boston crab with Dawson dropping a bunch of legs. The champs talk about not sleeping since winning the titles, what the B stands for, and not being scared of the Revival. Revival takes turns on the commentary as Dallas expresses his disdain for fists and flips.
A Side Effect gets Matt out of trouble and it’s off to Bray vs. Wilder again. Bray’s body block takes him down and we get what sounds like a CM PUNK chant. Dawson dropkicks Bray and everything breaks down with Matt and Dawson fighting to the floor. Now it’s a RUSEV DAY chant as Wilder slips out of Sister Abigail. The Shatter Machine ends Bray at 5:54.
Rollins talks about tired of getting jumped 2-1 when he’s jumped 2-1.
Riott Squad vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks
Sasha and Bayley now have matching jackets and want to be called the Boss and Hug Connection. No. Logan starts with an armbar on Bayley, who easily spins her down for a break. Banks comes in for the running Meteora and we hit the armbar. The announcers manage to stop talking about Reigns and Lesnar to talk about Evolution as Bayley hits a running knee in the corner.
Banks adds a Meteora on the apron and we take a break. Back with Banks in a chinlock until Morgan comes in for a chinlock of her own. What a versatile team. Banks gets up and throws her down for the hot tag to Bayley. A running knee to Morgan’s head has her in trouble and there’s the running elbow in the corner. Bayley hurricanranas Morgan down for a top rope Meteora (third of the match) from Banks. Bayley comes in off a blind tag and a Backstabber into the Bayley to Belly finishes Morgan at 8:48.
Heyman begs Lesnar to go out there so they can go be at a private steakhouse in 25 minutes. Lesnar’s pay has been confirmed so he doesn’t seem interested. Heyman finally explains the situation and asks him to do it as a friend. Lesnar grabs him by the jacket and says they’re not friends but just business associates. Therefore, Heyman needs to go out there and do his job.
Here are Angle and Corbin to address Heyman and Lesnar. Heyman does come out with no energy, knowing what’s about to happen. The fans greet him with the Goodbye Song and Heyman says Lesnar isn’t coming out here tonight. That sends Angle over the edge into a rant about what a champion does, like doing charity work, reaching out to the community, and DEFENDING THE TITLE. Angle: “BROCK LESNAR MUST BE THE WORST UNIVERSAL CHAMPION OF ALL TIME!” Fans: “YES!!!”
Heyman actually agrees and says he tried to rehabilitate Lesnar because he’s one of the few people Lesnar tolerates. Kurt doesn’t buy it but Heyman says take this out on Lesnar because Brock doesn’t respect anyone. However, Heyman thinks the world of Angle and would like to have a better working relationship with him. Angle fires him anyway, sending Heyman diving to Angle’s leg.
Cue Lesnar to give Heyman the greatest relief of his life. Lesnar finally gets in and hands the belt to Heyman before grabbing a mic. That’s rarely a good idea. He asks if Angle and Corbin have a problem with him….and there’s an F5 to Angle before a word is said. Corbin immediately leaves and Heyman slaps Brock on the back. Brock grabs him by the face and makes Heyman look at Angle. The fans want Strowman (or maybe Roman) but get Brock leaving to end the show. So yeah, that’s it and no, this isn’t going to get the result that the company wants, especially in New York.
Results
Baron Corbin b. Finn Balor – End of Days
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Big boot
Jinder Mahal b. Braun Strowman via countout
Apollo Crews b. Akam – Rollup
Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when Dolph Ziggler interfered
Revival b. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt – Shatter Machine to Wyatt
Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Riott Squad – Bayley to Belly to Morgan
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: July 31, 2018
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
Most of the blue half of Summerslam is either set up or you can tell where things are going. We still need to get the confirmation of Miz vs. Daniel Bryan and some #1 contenders for the Bludgeon Brothers. You can probably guess where things are going but it’s nice to have things made official. Let’s get to it.
Renee Young brings out Becky Lynch for a chat. Becky knew she would get back to the top of the mountain if she kept fighting. She hasn’t had a title match since Wrestlemania XXXIII nearly a year and a half ago. Now she’s back and just has to beat Carmella again to become Smackdown Women’s Champion again. Becky wants to go into Evolution as the champion but here’s Carmella to interrupt.
Carmella admits that she lost fair and square last week and that scares her. Becky has worked her way to the top and has been there to mentor Carmella every step of the way. She was the first woman to be drafted to Smackdown and Carmella was literally the last person drafted. With some tears in her eyes, Carmella talks about having to block out all the haters who say she’s not worthy of the title.
Now she’s getting to go into the biggest match of her career against her idol and they’re going to kill it. We’ll ignore why Carmella would want to have a great match rather than successfully defend her title but here’s James Ellsworth’s music. The distraction lets Carmella jump Becky from behind (as you knew was coming) and load up a chair. Cue the returning Charlotte for the save.
The Usos are in a dark room and quote Rock (that’s two Rock references in two nights) but one cuts the other off before he can swear.
Carmella comes in to rant to Paige about what happened and says Paige will never be champion again. Paige makes Carmella vs. Charlotte for tonight and if Charlotte wins, it’s a triple threat at Summerslam.
Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Usos vs. The Bar
Hang on though as New Day comes out to sit at a table full of cereal and pancakes. Sheamus and Jimmy start and we take a break before anything can happen. Back with Cesaro holding Jey in a chinlock as New Day is doing their own commentary. A double clothesline sets up a knee drop and it’s off to an armbar from Sheamus. Jey fights up as Big E. eats cereal and leads the cheers.
Sheamus goes shoulder first into the post and the hot tag brings in Jimmy. House is cleaned and a high crossbody gets two but Cesaro sends Jimmy into the post as we take another break. Back again with Jimmy hitting a Whisper in the Wind on Cesaro but not being able to follow up. The superkick into the Superfly Splash gets two with Cesaro making a save, sending New Day into hysterics. Cesaro breaks up half of the Double Us and the second Superfly Splash hits knees, giving Sheamus the pin at 15:05.
Post match New Day comes in for the staredown but the Bar bails.
Charlotte is very happy that Carmella’s big mouth has gotten her this opportunity. She doesn’t care about what has happened between the two of them before because things can change.
We look back at Samoa Joe attacking AJ Styles last week.
Here’s Samoa Joe with a message to AJ. He puts a stool in the ring and talks about how much he respects what AJ has done for the title, making it the most prestigious in WWE (the fans gasped a bit on that). AJ has put the title in front of what he wants and even in front of his own family. Last week AJ came out here and told a story about being able to talk to his daughter about being anything she wants to be.
The truth is that AJ is barely home long enough to hug his child, let alone look her in the eye. AJ is more comfortable living out of a suitcase than being at home with his family. He’s a great champion, even though he’s a failure as a father. Come Summerslam, AJ’s family will be cheering for Joe because it means they’ll have daddy back but Joe will be WWE Champion. This was more great stuff and as usual, it’s not about what Joe is saying but rather the intensity with which he says it. In a word, Joe comes off as real and that’s something most people can’t do in wrestling anymore.
Here’s Jeff Hardy (Wasn’t he supposed to be out with an injury?) to say the US Title is part of his life force. It is his fifth eye and allows him to connect with the WWE Universe. There is nothing more important than beating Shinsuke Nakamura and taking it back. The one thing that comes close is beating up Randy Orton, so get out here right now. As Orton comes out and gets in the ring, Nakamura comes in from behind to jump Hardy. Orton blocks the Kinshasa...before stepping aside so Nakamura can hit it.
Nakamura leaves and Orton loads up the RKO but sweeps both legs instead. The Orton Stomp returns and still looks stupid so Orton switches to regular stomping instead. Orton hits the hanging DDT off the apron and puts Jeff on the announcers’ table for some right hands. He rips off Jeff’s necklace and pours water on Jeff’s unconscious face so he can scrub the paint off with a cloth. Orton: “Enigma erased.” They’re making me want to see more of Orton and I could very easily picture him taking the title from AJ at this rate.
Becky isn’t thrilled with Charlotte possibly being added to the match but she knows she can defeat Carmella one on one. She’ll never root against her best friend.
Lana vs. Zelina Vega
Fallout from last week’s brawl between the two. Vega does Almas’ pose on the mat so Lana does a handstand as we have a pose off. Lana shoves her outside and we take an early break. Back with Vega holding her in a dragon sleeper (at least it’s something different) and getting two off the running knees in the corner. Lana gets in a kick to the ribs and a neckbreaker, followed by some dancing. Her own running knees to Vega’s back get two but Almas offers a distraction. Cue Aiden English to pull Almas down but Vega rolls her up for the pin at 6:00.
The Bludgeon Brothers still don’t care who wins the tournament because no one can escape the bludgeoning.
Aiden begs Lana’s forgiveness but leaves before Rusev arrives. I’m not sure why as Aiden was trying to help. Rusev comes in and says that wouldn’t have happened if he was out there. Lana is mad at him too and says she needed him.
Here’s Daniel Bryan to plug Evolution (this is why I wanted to wait for after Summerslam, as Evolution is getting almost as much if not more attention) because it makes him think of his wife Brie Bella. Brie was in the ring when the Give Divas A Chance campaign started. The two of them have fought for respect for years now but every time they’ve taken a step forward, it’s been two steps back.
We see a clip from last week of Miz throwing the fake baby at Bryan and beating him down. That bothers him because Miz taunted him for two years while hiding behind the wall of Bryan’s injury. But then Bryan was cleared and Miz had to find a new way to hide. Last week Maryse and the baby were the new wall because Miz knows he would get destroyed in a fight.
Miz pops up on screen with security around him. He doesn’t want to hear this from Bryan because we’re not in the indies. If Bryan wants to fight, call Miz’s agent because he’s on the set of Miz and Mrs. right now. Bryan calls him a coward again so Miz brings up the Talking Smack segment from 2016. This right here, the eternal conflict, is all Bryan wants because it’s what furthers Bryan’s career. It took Bryan ten years of fighting on the indies to get noticed but Miz just yelled at Bryan for five minutes and got famous.
Bryan says that’s the difference between the two of them: Bryan is in this for the passion and Miz just wants fame. It’s been done before and better, but Miz is never going to be the Rock or John Cena. If Miz needs a big stage, come fight Bryan at Summerslam. Miz laughs it off and says the YES Movement is dead because everyone has moved on. No one wants to hear from Bryan because all the fans see when they look at him is this, and the screen is filled with pictures of crying babies. More great stuff from these two as there’s a natural chemistry there and I’m fine with waiting on the match announcement, as it’s not like it’s a secret.
Charlotte vs. Carmella
Non-title but if Charlotte wins, the title match at Summerslam is a triple threat. Before the match, Carmella says her fashion sense is just as flawless as her wrestling abilities. Charlotte may not want to admit it but Becky is rooting against her. Carmella moon walks away to start so Charlotte shoulders her down and says all night baby.
A t-bone suplex into a nipup puts Carmella on the floor but Charlotte misses the slingshot dive. Carmella sends her into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Charlotte missing a moonsault and getting sent outside so Carmella can stomp away. Carmella takes her down with a chinlock and things slow a bit.
Charlotte fights up and hits a big boot before sending Carmella outside for a moonsault off the barricade. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two but the Figure Eight attempt is broken up. Carmella’s superkick gets two and she can’t believe all these kickouts. For some reason Carmella tries the Figure Four but gets reversed into the Figure Eight for the tap at 12:46.
Becky is upset in the back to end the show.
Results
The Bar b. Usos – Small package to Jey
Zelina Vega b. Lana – Rollup
Charlotte b. Carmella – Figure Eight
Wednesday
NXT
Date: August 1, 2018
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson, Mauro Ranallo
Last week, evil won. Tommaso Ciampa defeated Aleister Black to become the new NXT Champion, thanks to an accidental belt shot to Black’s head at the hands of Johnny Gargano. That is Gargano’s, as well as a lot of other people’s, worst nightmare and it’s going to make for an interesting future. Let’s get to it.
In Memory Of Nikolai Volkoff and Brian Christopher.
Long recap of last week’s title change. The crowd energy really did make that so much better, as is normally the case around here.
Opening sequence.
Heavy Machinery vs. The Mighty
The Mighty have new black coats and throw them at Heavy Machinery’s faces. Those coats are thrown back at them and followed by right hands before the bell even rings. Otis spins Miller around before planting him with a slam but Thorn is right back with a high dropkick (to a not very high Otis) to take over. A double belly to back suplex gets two and Thorn starts in on the arm.
They switch to the more traditional route with a chinlock, along with the traditional comeback via a belly to back suplex. That’s enough to bring in Knight to throw the Aussies around, followed by a Cannonball off the apron to take them both down. Back in and a chop block cuts Knight off...and we’ve got the Street Profits in the crowd. The Mighty are distracted enough to allow the hot ta to Otis and the Compactor finishes Miller at 5:15.
Moustache Mountain vs. Matt Knotts/???
Bate starts with the bigger Knotts, who mocks the wave. That means one heck of a left hand to Knotts’ jaw and Seven comes in for the chops. The unnamed jobber (Mauro: “His opponent.”
comes in and gets chopped as well, setting up a dragon suplex. Bate’s t-bone suplex drops Opponent and the top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination is good for the pin on Opponent at 2:21. Mountain looked great.Post match Moustache Mountain apologizes to the fans for losing the titles. Bate apologizes for throwing in the towel but they’re invoking their rematch clause for Takeover: Brooklyn. That’s going to be a VERY interesting crowd reaction.
EC3 vs. Kona Reeves
I don’t have to say this very often around here, but please make it short. Reeves can’t get out of a headlock to start as Nigel actually tries to compare him to Barry Windham. Thankfully EC3 hits a good looking elbow to make me forget about how ridiculous that statement was.
A cobra clutch (the Kona Clutch) has EC3 in trouble for all of a few moments before coming back up with left hands. EC3’s running flip neckbreaker but here’s the Velveteen Dream (DON’T START DOING THIS NXT!) who says someone still can’t get over Royal Albert Hall. Dream points behind EC3 and the Hawaiian Drop gives Reeves two. Reeves yells a lot and the One Percent finishes him off at 5:32.
In the back, EC3 says he’d love to join Dream’s experience because he knows it’s going to turn into a fight. He is the best here, he is the best there, he is the best anywhere.
Shayna Baszler vs. Candice LeRae
Non-title. Baszler offers LeRae a chance to leave and gets dropkicked for her efforts. LeRae goes for the arm but gets tossed outside, setting up a whip into the steps. That means Baszler can start in on the arm, bending it all over the place and stomping on it to bend it in rather painful directions. An enziguri gives LeRae a bit of relief and she takes Baszler down with a one armed snapmare.
Baszler staggers up and walks into a spinning middle rope Downward Spiral for one. A suicide dive has Baszler in even more trouble and the jumping tornado DDT gets two. Ms. LeRae’s Wild Ride is pulled down into the Kirifuda Clutch (the same way Baszler beat her in the Mae Young Classic) but this time LeRae grabs the rope. An Unprettier sets up a Lionsault but LeRae only hits mat. Baszler kicks her in the arm and the Clutch is good for the tap at 7:57.
Baszler goes after her again after the match but Kairi Sane makes the save. Sane checks on LeRae and Baszler kicks at her again, meaning referees have to hold Sane back as Baszler leaves.
Moustache Mountain is ready to beat the Undisputed Era again. They run into the War Raiders, who says they’re coming for whoever leaves Brooklyn with the titles.
Regal makes EC3 vs. Dream and Adam Cole vs. Ricochet for the North American Championship for Brooklyn.
Next week: Ricochet is back and Keith Lee makes his in-ring debut.
Here’s Ciampa for his first comments as champion. Mauro says Ciampa makes Thanos look like the Wizard of Oz. Now that’s a great line. Ciampa is reveling in being the champion and points at individual fans, laughing about his win and saying he told us so. Once he’s in the ring, Ciampa says he and the title make a beautiful couple. He’s a man of his word and won’t be listening to the fans telling him to shut up.
This is what happens when the most dangerous man in NXT takes his place at the head of the table. The fans chant at him even more so Ciampa complains about how heavy the title is on his shoulder. The icing on the cake was Gargano proving himself to be a failure because Ciampa won again. Ciampa was the magic answer to Black and now Black and Gargano can bicker about who is 2A and 2B. It doesn’t really matter because the gap between 1 and 2 has never been stronger. NXT will forever be the A show because he is the greatest sports entertainer (erg) of all time.
Ciampa sits in the ring and here’s Black to interrupt. Gargano sprints past him though and the fight is on with Ciampa being knocked to the floor. The champ bails through the crowd (that can’t be safe) and Gargano says he’s the reason Ciampa is champion. Black superkicks Gargano and the fans think Gargano deserved it. Well yeah he pretty much did. Black agrees with Gargano being to blame to end the show.
Results
Heavy Machinery b. The Mighty – Compactor to Miller
Moustache Mountain b. Matt Knotts/??? – Top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination to ???
EC3 b. Kona Reeves – One Percent
Shayna Baszler b. Candice LeRae – Kirifuda Clutch
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: August 2, 2018
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis
Things are still fresh off of Slammiversary but at the same time we don’t really have anything big going on yet. Austin Aries’ next challenger seems to be Eddie Edwards, but I’d assume that’s more of a one off TV match than a major pay per view story. Still though, there’s enough interesting stuff going on around here to keep me entertained. Let’s get to it.
The opening video looks at Aries retaining at Slammiversary but getting jumped by Eddie. Johnny Impact, Brian Cage, Pentagon Jr. and Sami Callihan get some attention as well.
Opening sequence.
Su Yung/Undead Bridesmaid vs. Kiera Hogan/Allie
Allie and Kiera slug their way through the read of the Bridesmaids with Kiera diving onto one of them and Allie diving onto the rest. Yung gets caught inside for a double teaming but Allie gets takes into the corner as the Bridesmaid comes back in. It’s Kiera getting beaten up in the corner with Yung coming in to hammer away with wild rights and lefts.
Kiera kicks the Bridesmaid away and hits a dropkick, allowing the hot tag off to Allie. The Codebreaker is blocked so it’s the Best Superkick Ever for two on Yung instead. Everything breaks down and a fisherman’s neckbreaker drops the Bridesmaid. The Panic Switch sends Kiera outside but the Codebreaker gives Allie the pin at 6:10.
Post match Tessa Blanchard comes in and takes Allie out with a hammerlock DDT.
Post break Tessa mocks Alie for wanting to save everyone when she can’t even help herself. Allie is only in this for herself and isn’t getting a Knockouts Title shot before Tessa.
Aries vs. Edwards in a title match is set for next week.
OGz vs. ???/???
Hernandez throws one across the ring and Homicide hits the Gringo Killer on the other one (in a SICK landing) for the pin at 50 seconds.
Post match, King says he told us so by getting rid of Konnan and the young boys and taking their titles. Cue LAX for the brawl as Konnan watches from the ramp. Ortiz pulls out A HATCHET but security and Konnan break it up. It being the attempted murder/butchering that is.
Post break Konnan says that was a trap and they’ll get their revenge when the time is right.
Classic clip: Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Petey Williams from Sacrifice 2006.
Sami Callihan, still with a bad arm, and OVE are ticked off but tonight they’ll make up for it by beating up the Lucha Brothers.
Desi Hit Squad vs. KM/Fallah Bahh
Bahh pounds his chest to start so the Squad tries some double teaming. I say try because Bahh whips them both in for a double crossbody and the Squad is flattened. The big fat leg connects and it’s off to KM for….well nothing of note before Bahh comes in again. This time he spends too long going after Gama though and a chop block brings him down.
Raju comes in for some kicks to the ribs but Bahh crushes him in the corner. That’s enough for the tag back to KM so house can be cleaned. The double roll over has the Squad in more trouble and some pokes to the eye make them scream. KM hits a full nelson slam but Bahh won’t leave, allowing Raju to hit a jumping knee to the face. Singh adds a jumping Downward Spiral for the pin at 6:13.
Anthony Carelli gives his student Dustin Cameron a pep talk before the match with Aries tonight. Cameron leaves and Carelli prays that he doesn’t die out there.
Johnny Impact wants his rematch with Kongo Kong but gets Jimmy Jacobs instead. Before Jimmy can say much, a right hand takes him down.
Impact Wrestling World Title: Austin Aries vs. Dustin Cameron
Aries is defending, eating a banana and wearing street clothes. Cameron gets taken down with ease, followed by a headlock takeover and a walk on his back. Some judo tosses give Cameron his only offense but there’s a discus forearm into the brainbuster for two, with Aries picking him up. Carelli throws in the towel at 3:29.
Post match Aries puts on the Last Chancery, drawing Carelli in. The fans chant for the Cobra but settle for a low blow to Ari-es instead. Eddie Edwards comes in for a kendo stick shot to send Aries running.
Alisha Edwards says she’s getting back in the ring when Eddie comes in to say things are going to be back to normal. He’s going to be World Champion again! That’s too much for Alisha and she leaves. Eddie: “Ok bye.”
Here’s Scarlett Bordeaux for a chat in the aisle. The interviewer can barely talk because he’s too busy staring at her and the stuttering is intense. Scarlett flirts with him (after naming him Bobo due to his stuttering) and says she won’t be hot shamed. He leaves and she dances a bit because the Smoke Show is here. I still need to see more of this but I don’t hate it.
Grado comes up to Eli Drake to yell about the gift from last week. A challenge for a tag match is thrown out and Drake steps to the side to grab Trevor Lee as his partner.
Grado/Joe Hendry vs. Eli Drake/Trevor Lee
The villains, including Caleb Konley, send Hendry outside and triple team Grado before Drake starts with the latter. A knee and basement clothesline have Grado in more trouble and Drake shouts to the crowd a lot. Grado is right back with his clothesline and the snap jabs but Lee pulls Hendry off the apron. The distraction lets Drake hit the Gravy Train for the easy pin at 3:12.
Post match Hendry and Grado hug it out.
The Desi Hit Squad is pleased with themselves but Gama Singh comes in to slap them in the face.
Video on Brian Cage retaining the X-Division Title last week in a good match.
Sydal admits that Cage is the better man but he’ll be looking inside of himself and questioning everything.
OVE vs. Fenix/Pentagon Jr.
They start fast and take turns running at each other until the Lucha Bros slide to the floor and take stereo suicide dives into the barricade. OVE beats them up a little more with Pentagon going into the post, only to come back with stereo superkicks. Now it’s a pair of flip dives to take out the Crists as we take a break. Back with Pentagon opening Dave’s shirt for a skin ripping chop.
Fenix launches Pentagon into Jake in the corner but Sami saves him from the spike Fear Factor. Some kicks to the head sent Pentagon outside, leaving Jake to put on something like a reverse Rings of Saturn (Naomi used to use it) on Fenix. Jake and Dave take turns going for the mask until Fenix kicks Jake in the head. Pentagon comes in but the Crists tie their masks together so the Lucha Bros are in even more trouble.
The masks come untied and Jake spikes Fenix for two. Pentagon gets back up though and it’s time for some corner clotheslines, followed by stereo superkicks on Jake. Fenix hits a top rope double stomp to Jake’s back, leaving Dave to take the spike Fear Factor. A flip dive takes out Jake and Sami as Dave is pinned at 17:23.
Killer Kross talks about realizing you’re in your final moments. The camera pans down to show an unconscious Carelli to end the show. That feels like writing him off TV, and that’s for the best.
Results
Allie/Kiera Hogan b. Undead Bridesmaid/Su Yung – Codebreaker to Yung
OGz b. ???/??? – Gringo Killer to ???
Desi Hit Squad b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Jumping Downward Spiral to KM
Austin Aries b. Dustin Cameron when Anthony Carelli threw in the towel
Eli Drake/Trevor Lee b. Grado/Joe Hendry – Gravy Train to Grado
Fenix/Pentagon Jr. b. OVE – Spike Fear Factor to Dave Crist
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Baron Corbin b. Finn Balor – End of Days
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Big boot
Jinder Mahal b. Braun Strowman via countout
Apollo Crews b. Akam – Rollup
Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when Dolph Ziggler interfered
Revival b. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt – Shatter Machine to Wyatt
Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Riott Squad – Bayley to Belly to Morgan
Smackdown
The Bar b. Usos – Small package to Jey
Zelina Vega b. Lana – Rollup
Charlotte b. Carmella – Figure Eight
NXT
Heavy Machinery b. The Mighty – Compactor to Miller
Moustache Mountain b. Matt Knotts/??? – Top rope knee/Burning Hammer combination to ???
EC3 b. Kona Reeves – One Percent
Shayna Baszler b. Candice LeRae – Kirifuda Clutch
Impact Wrestling
Allie/Kiera Hogan b. Undead Bridesmaid/Su Yung – Codebreaker to Yung
OGz b. ???/??? – Gringo Killer to ???
Desi Hit Squad b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Jumping Downward Spiral to KM
Austin Aries b. Dustin Cameron when Anthony Carelli threw in the towel
Eli Drake/Trevor Lee b. Grado/Joe Hendry – Gravy Train to Grado
Fenix/Pentagon Jr. b. OVE – Spike Fear Factor to Dave Crist