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Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: May 7, 2018
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman
We’re coming off….whatever Backlash was supposed to be last night and that means it’s time to start setting up Money in the Bank. Aside from the weeks of singles matches between the qualifiers and that same song that they’ve used for at least five years now, I’m not sure what else we have coming up. Let’s get to it.
Here’s Kurt Angle to get things going, walking past the ladders on the stage on the way. Angle talks about how WWE never stops, fifty two weeks a year (tell me about it). That brings us to Money in the Bank qualifying matches, which start tonight with two triple threat matches. First up we’ll have Ember Moon vs. Ruby Riott vs. Sasha Banks, followed by Roman Reigns vs. Finn Balor vs. Sami Zayn.
Cue Braun Strowman to interrupt and ask about when he was a kid and all of his friends built a tree house. No one asked him to help and he had to listen to them talk about their secret handshake to get into the tree house. Then one day, he waited until they were all in the tree house and knocked the whole tree down. With the story of attempted/successful murder out of the way, Angle thinks Strowman should deserve a shot (what kind of shot isn’t specified) at Money in the Bank.
Cue Kevin Owens (Happy Birthday) to point out that Sami wasn’t legal last night so Strowman isn’t on a roll. The only thing Strowman deserves is to go to a giant corner so he can reflect on how he’s been a very bad monster! Strowman offers Owens his hands but Kevin isn’t interested. Instead he talks about how Stephanie McMahon is watching and thinks he should be entered straight into the ladder match. Angle makes a qualifying match between Owens and Strowman, which starts RIGHT NOW. Well after the break but close enough.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman
Strowman shoves Owens away to start, knocking the referee down in the process. Some whips into the corner knock Owens down twice in a row before sending him outside. Owens tries to bail into the crowd but manages to catch Strowman in a tornado DDT. Strowman beats the count at eight and Owens is losing his mind. Back in and Strowman hits him in the chest but Owens sends him outside again as we take a break. We come back with Strowman hitting the same kind of knockdown as he did earlier, only to get kicked in the head.
Owens gets two off a backsplash but Strowman pops up with a big boot. Strowman misses a charge into the corner and it’s a superkick into the bullfrog splash for two more. There’s another superkick but the Pop Up Powerbomb just isn’t happening. Instead it’s a splash in the corner and Owens bails outside. The running gag continues with Strowman shouldering him down three times in a row. Back in and the running powerslam sends Strowman to the ladder match at 8:42.
Roman Reigns says he’s the uncrowned Universal Champion. Tonight he’s going to qualify for Money in the Bank and then get his title.
Bayley wants to hug the Money in the Bank briefcase.
Breezango wants the golden ticket in the briefcase. Fandango: “I thought it was a contract.”
Goldust wants to go to Money in the Bank but here’s Jinder Mahal to interrupt. He wants to be in the triple threat match instead of Reigns so Angle gives him a match with Chad Gable. If Mahal wins, Angle will consider it.
No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide vs. Revival/Baron Corbin
But remember: Vince loves Corbin. Titus throws Wilder around to start before it’s off to Apollo for a suplex on Dawson. Corbin comes in to beat the heck out of Crews, including sending him face first into the apron. Dawson comes back in under more favorable circumstances with an abdominal stretch. That’s broken up and everything breaks down with Crews being low bridged to the floor. Corbin makes a blind tag as Jose hits the pop up punch on Dawson. End of Days knocks Jose silly for the pin at 4:59.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Ruby Riott vs. Ember Mon vs. Sasha Banks
Sasha and Ember get together to start and take Riott down, only to have Banks roll Moon up for two. Some rather athletic armdrags have Banks in trouble but Riott comes back in to send Sasha face first into the middle buckle. Sasha gets sent outside again as we hear about how successful Money in the Bank cash-ins have been. A double DDT plants Sasha and Moon for two each and it’s off to a chinlock on Moon. That’s broken up with a jawbreaker but here’s Sasha back in to run people over.
Banks stops to dive onto the Riott Squad though, allowing Riott to run her over. Moon hits a heck of a suicide dive for two on Riott as the fans are distracted by something in the crowd, which gets a YOU DESERVE IT chant. Back in and Banks gets two off a sunset flip with the Riott Squad coming in for the legal save. Cue Bayley to help Sasha but the Squad takes her out as well. Moon heads up top for an Eclipse to both Banks and Riott at the same time for the pin on Riott at 10:23.
Post break, Ember promises to rise up and grab the briefcase.
Video on Bobby Lashley.
Lashley gets a sitdown interview, talking about his family, including his parents and sisters. At one point his sister’s security towel (instead of security blanket) was taken away by some bullies so he took care of them. We wrap it up with Lashley saying hello to his sisters. So….Lashley is a family man when he’s not a monster. Got it. Not sure if I want it, but got it.
Sami and Kevin aren’t sure about trusting each other but Owens reluctantly agrees to have Sami’s back in the triple threat tonight. Sami is rather pleased.
Chad Gable vs. Jinder Mahal
Gable wastes no time in getting two off a rollup, only to have Jinder knock him down without much effort. We hit a bearhug of all things on Gable before Mahal sends him chest first into the corner. Gable pops up top with the moonsault press for a close two, followed by an even closer rollup for the same. Not that it matters as the superkick sets up the Khallas to give Jinder the pin at 4:12.
Post match Mahal beats on Gable some more
Alexa Bliss promises to win the briefcase to become champion and beat the bully Nia Jax once and for all.
Ascension promises to win the briefcase. Wait is there a tag team MITB match that I didn’t hear about?
Zack Ryder wants to be in a Money in the Bank qualifying match in his hometown when Mahal comes in to demand the triple threat be turned into a four way. Angle says Woo Woo Woo, the answer is no, bro. Ryder is pleased despite not being put in a match either.
Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler and Rhyno start things off but it’s quickly off to Slater for a headlock. Drew comes in and gets punched a few times but kicks Slater down to take over. Ziggler tags himself back in and it’s a superkick into a reverse Alabama Slam to drop Slater. That one superkick is enough for Ziggler so it’s the Claymore/Zig Zag combination for the pin on Slater at 2:39.
Here’s Elias to talk about Bobby Roode jumping him last night. He’s not happy with Roode but hang on because the fans like Rusev Day. Elias cuts them off and sings about how Roode isn’t glorious and this city sucks.
Bobby Roode vs. Elias
Roode wastes no time with an enziguri putting Elias on the floor as we take an early break. Back with Elias backdropping him and hammering away in the corner. We hit a Crossface of all things (closer to a Banks Statement actually) to keep Roode down but he snaps off a spinebuster for a breather.
A backbreaker stops Roode and Cole confirms that there will be eight people in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match with four from each show. Wait wouldn’t that suggest just two ladder matches? SWEET! Elias loads up a ram into the buckle but gets kicked away. Roode can’t follow up though, allowing Elias to talk some trash. He talks a bit too much though and it’s the Glorious DDT for the pin at 10:26.
Post break Roode says he hopes that’s enough to get into the Money in the Bank picture because winning the ladder match will be GLORIOUS.
Here’s Seth Rollins to talk about how he’s a fighting champion and wants someone else to face for the title. After last night against Miz, he needs a new challenge so it’s Open Challenge time.
Intercontinental Title: Mojo Rawley vs. Seth Rollins
Rollins is defending, we get Big Match Intros and Mojo is greeted with WE WANT RYDER chants. Rawley wastes no time in knocking Rollins outside and running him over, including a shoulder to send him into the barricade. Back from a break with Mojo throwing him down and talking more trash. A Downward Spiral into the middle buckle rocks Rawley and a clothesline puts him on the floor.
Back to back suicide dives hit Rawley and the Blockbuster gets two back inside. Rawley is right back with a spinebuster for two and frustration sets in at a rather fast pace. The low superkick gives Seth two but Mojo’s fireman’s carry faceplant gets the same. One heck of a Pounce knocks Seth into the corner but he’s right back up with a ripcord knee. A superkick to the ribs sets up the Stomp for the pin to retain at 10:56.
Finn Balor says the victory at Money in the Bank will be so much sweeter.
Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas vs. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt
Non-title and Axel/Dallas might be known as Stay Tuned. Bray runs Axel over to start as Graves goes over the history between Bray and Matt, going back thousands of years for as complete a version as possible. Axel blocks a Twist of Fate and DDTs Matt to give Dallas two. It’s off to Bray to run people over, followed by a kick to knock Dallas off the apron. Axel dives into a release Rock Bottom and a double Downward Spiral is good for the pin at 2:40.
Natalya promises to bring the MITB contract home to her cat.
Baron Corbin says he’s winning the contract again.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Roman Reigns vs. Finn Balor vs. Sami Zayn
Sami yells at Reigns to start and gets punched in the face to send him outside. Balor speeds things up and dropkicks Reigns down for two as the announcers debate how important Money in the Bank is compared to the rest of the year. More right hands drop Balor and Zayn as we take an early break. Back with Balor stomping on Reigns until Sami grabs a rollup for two.
There’s a Samoan drop to put Zayn on the floor with Balor on the opposite side. The fans start a TOO SWEET chant and the double beating is on to one of the strongest reactions of the night. Even Balor and Sami seem taken aback by the YES chants. The three head into the crowd and the fans are annoyed when Reigns comes back. A Helluva Kick knocks Reigns into the tech area and the other two head back inside to kill time until Reigns spears one of them.
The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Sami two but Balor fights back and they head to the floor. The fans start booing and I think you know what that means. Cue Reigns diving over the barricade to take Sami out but Balor drops Reigns again. Back in and Reigns hits the Superman Punch on Sami. The Sling Blade looks to set up the Coup de Grace but Reigns rolls away. Instead it’s another Superman Punch but here’s Mahal to trip Reigns. The distraction lets Sami hit the Helluva Kick to drop Reigns but Balor hit the shotgun dropkick and Coup de Grace on Sami for the pin at 15:25.
Results
Braun Strowman b. Kevin Owens – Running powerslam
Baron Corbin/Revival b. No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide – End of Days to Jose
Ember Moon b. Ruby Riott and Sasha Banks – Eclipse to Riott
Jinder Mahal b. Chad Gable – Khallas
Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler b. Heath Slater/Rhyno – Claymore/Zig Zag combination to Slater
Bobby Roode b. Elias – Glorious DDT
Seth Rollins b. Mojo Rawley – Stomp
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt b. Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas – Double Downward Spiral to Axel
Finn Balor b. Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns – Coup de Grace to Zayn
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: May 8, 2018
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
It’s Money in the Bank season and qualifying matches are in the air. Last night’s Monday Night Raw saw three qualifying matches and tonight Smackdown will equal that amount with three matches already announced. Unfortunately they’re not the most intriguing matches but at least they’re getting them out of the way early. Let’s get to it.
Here’s Paige to open things up. After recapping Backlash (erg, enough), it’s time to talk about Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles. The match was on its way towards being a classic (not exactly) when the double low blow stopped things. We’ll be back to that later but for now it’s time to talk about Money in the Bank. She needs the best in the match so we’ll start….now.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. The Miz
Non-title. Miz cranks on the arm to start as the announcers talk about Miz’s history in the Money in the Bank match. Jeff sends him outside and hits Poetry in Motion against the barricade but it’s way too early for the Swanton. We take a break and come back with Jeff holding an armbar as the pace stays slow. The Reality Check gets two on Jeff but he elbows out of a Skull Crushing Finale attempt.
They head outside with Jeff getting the better of a slugout as the sleeves of Jeff’s shirt make me want a rainbow pop. The legdrop between the legs and the Twisting Stunner rock Miz but again he gets out of the way before the Swanton. Miz slams him neck first onto the apron and we take another break.
Back again with Jeff jawbreaking his way out of a chinlock and getting two off the Whisper in the Wind. A baseball slide knocks Miz to the floor but again he avoids the Swanton, this time with a good crotching. Instead it’s a sunset bomb for two as the back and forth continues. The Twist of Fate gets two and a corner dropkick sets up Hardiac Arrest (the other corner dropkick). Another Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton for real this time, but Miz rolls him up for the pin at 20:16.
Sheamus is eating Lucky Charms because it’s all that makes him feel better after losing to Xavier Woods last week. Cesaro compares it to a hawk losing a mouse between its claws. Sheamus: “I know! I was in the match!” Cesaro says he could have won so he agrees to face Woods tonight as well. He opens his bag and finds….pancakes. Sheamus finds the same thing and panic ensues. I like New Day a lot but WHY ARE PANCAKES FUNNY???
Sanity is coming.
We look at stills of Nakamura vs. Styles.
Renee Young talks to Nakamura, who isn’t cleared for competition tonight. In regards to the issues being over, no speak English. I mean, he knew it before but he’s forgotten it. As for AJ, they’re both nuts (laugh from the crowd) and they’re not finished.
Carmella screeches about beating Charlotte and it’s time to party. She’ll be celebrating next week in London. The Royal Family isn’t invited, just like Ric Flair isn’t invited. Speaking of Flair, did you know he has a daughter? Carmella beat her on Sunday.
Tye Dillinger says seven competitors down on the mat plus one contract plus one ladder plus one person left equals a perfect ten.
Naomi is going to make whomever is champion feel the Glow.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Charlotte vs. Peyton Royce
Before the match, Billie says Charlotte’s loss made her uncle overcome his stutter because he was laughing so hard. Peyton tries to imitate the look but it’s only funny when Charlotte does it. They lock up to start with Charlotte shoving her around. A toss to the floor takes us to an early break. Back with Peyton grabbing a chinlock before choking in the corner. A half nelson over the ropes with her legs has Charlotte in even more trouble and we hit another chinlock. Charlotte fights up with a neckbreaker by the hair but misses a big boot (but Peyton doesn’t sell it like Carmella did on Sunday).
A rollup gets two on Peyton and Charlotte dives onto Billie, leaving Peyton to grab a swinging neckbreaker on the floor. The referee gets distracted by Peyton so Billie can snap Charlotte’s neck across the top, setting up a spinning kick to the face for two. Charlotte is right back with the big boot, only to have the moonsault hit knees. Royce kicks the knee out for two but gets speared down. The Figure Eight makes Peyton tap at 12:56.
Daniel Bryan is ready to go win the Money in the Bank briefcase again because he cashed in the briefcase right here in Baltimore.
Shelton says he’ll win the briefcase.
Asuka says she’ll win the briefcase.
Xavier Woods vs. Cesaro
Hang on though as Big E. and Kofi have to throw out pancakes. Woods hits and moves but stops himself from running into the referee, allowing Cesaro to run him over. There’s a gutwrench suplex and we take a break. Back with Woods kicking him down and a wheelbarrow faceplant getting two. Sheamus gets on the apron but Big E. throws pancakes at him, allowing Kofi to hit a dive from the apron. The distraction lets Cesaro uppercut Woods out of the air for the pin at 7:07.
AJ Styles is still coming for Nakamura because it’s still about the title.
We see a bunch of destroyed action figures of tag teams. The Bludgeon Brothers say they have their own set of toys so come play with them. They smash the camera with their hammers.
Becky Lynch vs. Mandy Rose
In the back, Paige says Sonya Deville can’t go out there with Mandy. An early kick to the face gives Mandy two but a chinlock doesn’t last long. The Disarm-Her attempt sends Mandy outside so Becky catches her with the Bexploder instead. Becky’s bouncing kick out of the corner is broken up though and Mandy sends her throat first into the ropes for the pin at 2:26.
Andrade Cien Almas and Zelina Vega debut next week.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Daniel Bryan vs. Rusev
Bryan starts in on the legs early on and kicks the arm out for good measure. Some more kicks sends Rusev outside so Bryan tries the suicide dive, only to be caught and thrown over the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Rusev throwing him around some more but getting dropkicked in the corner.
The Spinning Rock Bottom doesn’t work so Rusev kicks him in the head for two instead. A quick YES Lock sends Rusev bailing to the ropes and Aiden English is rather relieved. Rusev heads outside so Bryan hits the running knee off the apron for two. Back in and the running knee misses, setting up a Machka Kick to give Rusev the completely clean pin at 11:20.
Bryan looks devastated to end the show. It certainly seems like they have something planned there.
Results
The Miz b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup
Charlotte b. Peyton Royce – Figure Eight
Cesaro b. Xavier Woods – Uppercut
Mandy Rose b. Becky Lynch – Neck snap across the top rope
Rusev b. Daniel Bryan – Machka Kick
Wednesday
NXT
Date: May 9, 2018
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Percy Watson, Mauro Ranallo
We’re in that odd period of NXT as we’re too far away from the next Takeover to really start building there but too far from the previous Takeover to deal with fallout. NXT is capable of pulling off something in the meantime though and that should be more than enough to bridge the gap. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Ricochet to get things going. Everywhere he’s gone in his career, he’s tried to have people talking about him. Over Wrestlemania weekend, his goal was to leave people talking. You can call it confidence or cockiness but it’s who he is. Now the only thing on his mind is the NXT Championship but here’s Velveteen Dream to interrupt. Dream says no no no and wants to know who gave Ricochet the authority to come out here and ask for title shots. He needs Ricochet to take a step back and asks about the One and Only nickname.
Dream questions if Ricochet makes things look good because Ricochet is looking at the one experience. Ricochet can jump around all he wants but remember he’ll land in the back of the line behind the Dream. Ricochet says Dream is a lot, but he’s not Ricochet so enjoy the spotlight while you can. That’s fine with Dream, because anything Ricochet can do, Dream can do better. Ricochet: “Prove it.” Dream teases throwing a punch but drops to the mat instead, leaving after Ricochet winks at him. I could go for this feud, but I’m not sure where Dream goes if he loses another big match.
Raul Mendoza vs. EC3
Mendoza grabs a headlock to start, followed by a missile dropkick. EC3 is right back with a reverse bulldog driver (I’m not sure how much that would hurt) and sends him face first into a buckle. A TKO is good for the pin (with two hands on the chest for the cover) at 2:44.
Post match EC3 says he doesn’t care about losing at Takeover because adversity makes a man. The only thing you’ll see out of him going forward is victory after victory. Then this place will be NX3.
Last week Oney Lorcan and Danny Burch told Pete Dunne that they don’t like him but they’ll have his back because they don’t like Undisputed Era either. Dunne leaves without saying anything. That’s about what I expected.
Dakota Kai vs. Vanessa Bourne
Kai hits a running dropkick but misses a running version in the corner. Bourne is right back with a kick to the ribs and a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker for two. We hit the double arm crank for a bit before Kai is back up with more kicks. Now the running kick in the corner rocks Bourne, followed by a running sunset flip into a Backstabber (cool) for the pin on Bourne at 2:36.
Post match Shayna Baszler comes out and Kai is terrified. Shayna drops the title and chokes Bourne off as Kai leaves in fear (with Baszler staring her down) instead of making a save. When Kai stands up for herself, many months from now, the pop is going to be unholy.
Back from a break with Kai being unsure what just happened. Baszler comes in and tells her to do something about it. Kai still can’t move so Shayna laughs and leaves. Kai hears more laughter and Nikki Cross is hanging from piece of metal and laughing at her too. Now that’s kind of interesting.
Heavy Machinery vs. War Raiders
Rowe and Dozovic start things off and it breaks down into a four way forearm slugout in no time. Knight gets sent outside and Dozovic gets kneed in the ribs. He’s still able to suplex Hanson down so it’s off to Knight vs. Rowe. Hanson is right back in with a suicide dive to Dozovic, leaving Knight to take Fallout for the pin at 2:52. That’s all this needed to be.
We look back at TM61 cheating to defeat the Street Profits.
The Profits are training because this is serious.
Tommaso Ciampa vs. Kassius Ohno
Still no music for Ciampa. Ohno takes it to the floor early on and sends Ciampa into the barricade. One heck of a right hand sends Ciampa back into the ring but he snaps Ohno’s throat across the top rope. A running knee to the head rocks Ohno again and a kick to the side of the head puts him down as Ciampa asks if Ohno is Gargano’s big brother. Ohno blocks a chop and hits a bicycle kick. It’s time to go simple as Ohno stands on Ciampa’s head and then drops an exposed knee onto Ciampa’s damaged eye.
A shot to the face knocks something out of Ciampa’s mouth and puts on a cravate choke into something like a Bubba Bomb (with a cravate instead of a full nelson) for two. Ciampa is right back and pulls at Ohno’s eye, setting up a running knee to the back of the head for a near fall of his own (I thought that was it). A clothesline sets up a neckbreaker into a faceplant to put Ohno away at 9:32. Mauro is LIVID that Ciampa won.
Post match Ciampa hits Ohno in the back of the head with his knee brace and chokes him with it. Ciampa shouts that he broke Johnny’s spirit and broke Candace’s heart so the Gargano fairy tale is over.
Results
EC3 b. Raul Mendoza – TKO
Dakota Kai b. Vanessa Bourne – Sunset Backstabber
War Raiders b. Heavy Machinery – Fallout to Knight
Tommaso Ciampa b. Kassius Ohno – Neckbreaker into a faceplant
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2018
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh Matthews
We’re still dealing with the Redemption fallout while also starting the build towards Slammiversary. Tonight’s big deal is Eli Drake cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase for the World Title shot against Pentagon Jr. You also have Austin Aries roaming around near the title and some other people aren’t far behind. Let’s get to it.
We open with Josh Matthews in the studio talking about Sami Callihan wrecking a recent ceremony in Don Callis’ honor. Apparently Sami is livid at Callis for throwing in the towel to save Eddie Edwards at the WrestleCon show and wanted revenge.
There’s currently a meeting going on regarding Sami’s future. We’ll cut into whatever to let you know the outcome.
It’s off to the ceremony in Toronto with Anthony Carelli (Santino Marella) giving Callis an award. Cue Sami to attack Callis and beat him down while busting him open. Fine angle, but Callis has been on camera around here for less than a month. That’s quite a lot of faith to bet on fans caring about something like this.
The regular opening video talks about Drake vs. Pentagon.
Opening sequence.
Andrew Everett/DJZ vs. LAX
Santana and DJZ start things off with a rather speedy exchange until Ortiz comes in for some double teaming to take over. It’s off to Everett for a failed fireman’s carry gutbuster as Santana is keeping his eyes open for anyone trying to interfere. Santana’s cutter gives Everett two and Josh gives us updates on the meeting: it’s still going on. I’ll take nothing new Josh over nitwit/stupid/self praising Josh. Everett rolls over into a kick to Santana before rolling over to DJZ for the tag.
DJZ sends them together so Ortiz DDTs Santana in that spot that is still so stupidly contrived. A double kick takes DJZ down but a double kick takes LAX down. Everything breaks down and DJZ tornado DDTs Ortiz, only to walk into a Santana superkick. Everett hits a very good looking top rope Asai moonsault to drop Ortiz but Ortiz is up a few moments later for a suicide flip dive. The Street Sweeper is broken up and DJZ rolls Ortiz up for the pin at 8:28.
Grado is still waiting on his girlfriend but Joseph Park says he smells a rat. Cue Katie Lea Burchill/Winter (now known as Katarina) name she’s going by now to hug Grado and say she’ll see “James” (Park) later.
Austin Aries wants Eli Drake to win tonight because he knows he can beat him.
Rohit Raju vs. Grado
Before Josh can say it: WHO IS THE DESI HIT SQUAD AND WHY SHOULD I CARE? Raju jumps Grado while he gives Katarina his hat but can’t suplex the rather rotund one. Some running boots to the face in the corner give Raju two and we hit the chinlock. Grado is back with a side slam and a falling splash, which Josh calls unique. That would be true, if Ortiz didn’t do the same thing in the previous match.
We go split screen for a second to show that the meeting is still going. Grado takes too much time with his dancing punches and gets kneed in the face. A swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker gets two but Grado is right back with an elbow to the head and the Cannonball for the pin at 5:39.
Joseph Park is the latest X victim. Given that one of his finishers is called Weapon X, Cage is a possible suspect.
Video on Tessa Blanchard, who has wrestling in her blood and has to be the best.
Eli Drake and Scott Steiner are in the back with Drake saying tonight, he becomes the new belt collector. Steiner doesn’t like the idea of Drake saying he’ll do this himself.
Drago vs. Aerostar vs. Taiji Ishimori vs. El Hijo Del Fantasma
Lucha rules and the winner gets a future X-Division Title shot. Now that’s all I ask. Ishimori and Fantasma are sent to the floor in about thirty seconds, leaving Drago and Aerostar to trade covers. The other two replace them in a hurry and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Ishimori. A good looking middle rope moonsault to the floor drops Drago and we take a break.
Back with Drago kicking Fantasma in the mask and hitting an ankle scissors to take Fantasma down again. Ishimori comes back in with a Regal roll for two on Drago. All four get back in and Fantasma superkicks Drago down. Ishimori drops Fantasma as well and all four are down for a bit. Drago is sent outside for a dive from Ishimori, followed by a dive each from Fantasma and Aerostar. Back in and Aerostar powerbombs Ishimori into the corner for two but the Thrill of the Kill gives Fantasma the pin on Aerostar for the pin at 16:43.
Eddie Edwards goes into the meeting and demands that Callihan not be fired. Management tells him to do what he has to do away from the Impact Zone.
From House of Hardcore in Fort Wayne, Indiana.
Moose vs. Kongo Kong
Joined in progress with Moose hitting a dropkick but getting thrown to the floor. Kong follows him out and whips Moose into the barricade as Josh talks about Callihan and Edwards over and over. Kong’s waistlock doesn’t get him very far so he sends Moose shoulder first into the post. Moose switches to a more simplistic offense by shouldering him down but Jimmy Jacobs comes in with a chair for the DQ at 6:08.
KM wants Fallah Bahh to become the best man that he can and we get shots of them screaming into the camera.
Montage of KM training Bahh to make him lose weight while eating various bad food. Bahh passes out.
From Pro Wrestling Noah and if what I can find is correct, this is from June 4, 2017.
Brian Cage vs. Takashi Sugiura
Joined in progress with Cage hitting a delayed vertical suplex, followed by a standing moonsault for two. Josh: “If the Avengers ever needed a new member, and they do after Infinity War, they should get Brian Cage.” That’s getting rather close to a spoiler. Cage hits the apron suplex for two more but Sugiura knees him down and hits some running knees in the corner.
A superplex attempt is broken up but Sugiura snaps off a top rope hurricanrana to put both guys down. There’s a buckle bomb to drop Sugiura and an F5 gets two. A German suplex and running knee give Sugiura the same but Cage blasts him with the Tornado Claw for two more. The Drill Claw is good for the pin on Sugiura at 7:49.
From Destination X 2009, Suicide wins the X-Division Title.
Allie is looking in a mirror and has flashbacks to last week. She finds a doll with a note pinned to it and opens it up. While we don’t see what it says, Allie looks a little disturbing when she looks in the mirror, almost like something is trying to take control of her.
Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Pentagon Jr.
Pentagon is defending and Steiner isn’t here with Drake. They trade catchphrases to start and Drake sends him into the corner to stand on his head. Back to back Sling Blades give Pentagon two as Aries is watching in the back, banana in hand. A powerslam cuts Pentagon off as we’re told that next week, House of Hardcore will present Edwards vs. Callihan in a street fight. At least there’s a storyline reason for going to another promotion this time.
We hit the chinlock for a bit before Pentagon headscissors Drake out to the floor. A superkick to the ribs knocks Drake out of the air and the Codebreaker out of the corner gets two. The Gravy Train doesn’t work and Drake misses a top rope Lionsault, allowing Pentagon to hit the Pentagon Driver for the pin at 7:09.
Results
Andrew Everett/DJZ b. LAX – Victory roll to Ortiz
Grado b. Rohit Raju – Cannonball
El Hijo Del Fantasma b. Aerostar, Taiji Ishimori and Drago – Thrill of the Kill to Aerostar
Moose b. Kongo Kong via DQ when Jimmy Jacobs interfered
Brian Cage b. Takashi Sugiura – Drill Claw
Pentagon Jr. b. Eli Drake – Pentagon Driver
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Braun Strowman b. Kevin Owens – Running powerslam
Baron Corbin/Revival b. No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide – End of Days to Jose
Ember Moon b. Ruby Riott and Sasha Banks – Eclipse to Riott
Jinder Mahal b. Chad Gable – Khallas
Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler b. Heath Slater/Rhyno – Claymore/Zig Zag combination to Slater
Bobby Roode b. Elias – Glorious DDT
Seth Rollins b. Mojo Rawley – Stomp
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt b. Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas – Double Downward Spiral to Axel
Finn Balor b. Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns – Coup de Grace to Zayn
Smackdown
The Miz b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup
Charlotte b. Peyton Royce – Figure Eight
Cesaro b. Xavier Woods – Uppercut
Mandy Rose b. Becky Lynch – Neck snap across the top rope
Rusev b. Daniel Bryan – Machka Kick
NXT
EC3 b. Raul Mendoza – TKO
Dakota Kai b. Vanessa Bourne – Sunset Backstabber
War Raiders b. Heavy Machinery – Fallout to Knight
Tommaso Ciampa b. Kassius Ohno – Neckbreaker into a faceplant
Impact Wrestling
Andrew Everett/DJZ b. LAX – Victory roll to Ortiz
Grado b. Rohit Raju – Cannonball
El Hijo Del Fantasma b. Aerostar, Taiji Ishimori and Drago – Thrill of the Kill to Aerostar
Moose b. Kongo Kong via DQ when Jimmy Jacobs interfered
Brian Cage b. Takashi Sugiura – Drill Claw
Pentagon Jr. b. Eli Drake – Pentagon Driver
Monday Night Raw
Date: May 7, 2018
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman
We’re coming off….whatever Backlash was supposed to be last night and that means it’s time to start setting up Money in the Bank. Aside from the weeks of singles matches between the qualifiers and that same song that they’ve used for at least five years now, I’m not sure what else we have coming up. Let’s get to it.
Here’s Kurt Angle to get things going, walking past the ladders on the stage on the way. Angle talks about how WWE never stops, fifty two weeks a year (tell me about it). That brings us to Money in the Bank qualifying matches, which start tonight with two triple threat matches. First up we’ll have Ember Moon vs. Ruby Riott vs. Sasha Banks, followed by Roman Reigns vs. Finn Balor vs. Sami Zayn.
Cue Braun Strowman to interrupt and ask about when he was a kid and all of his friends built a tree house. No one asked him to help and he had to listen to them talk about their secret handshake to get into the tree house. Then one day, he waited until they were all in the tree house and knocked the whole tree down. With the story of attempted/successful murder out of the way, Angle thinks Strowman should deserve a shot (what kind of shot isn’t specified) at Money in the Bank.
Cue Kevin Owens (Happy Birthday) to point out that Sami wasn’t legal last night so Strowman isn’t on a roll. The only thing Strowman deserves is to go to a giant corner so he can reflect on how he’s been a very bad monster! Strowman offers Owens his hands but Kevin isn’t interested. Instead he talks about how Stephanie McMahon is watching and thinks he should be entered straight into the ladder match. Angle makes a qualifying match between Owens and Strowman, which starts RIGHT NOW. Well after the break but close enough.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman
Strowman shoves Owens away to start, knocking the referee down in the process. Some whips into the corner knock Owens down twice in a row before sending him outside. Owens tries to bail into the crowd but manages to catch Strowman in a tornado DDT. Strowman beats the count at eight and Owens is losing his mind. Back in and Strowman hits him in the chest but Owens sends him outside again as we take a break. We come back with Strowman hitting the same kind of knockdown as he did earlier, only to get kicked in the head.
Owens gets two off a backsplash but Strowman pops up with a big boot. Strowman misses a charge into the corner and it’s a superkick into the bullfrog splash for two more. There’s another superkick but the Pop Up Powerbomb just isn’t happening. Instead it’s a splash in the corner and Owens bails outside. The running gag continues with Strowman shouldering him down three times in a row. Back in and the running powerslam sends Strowman to the ladder match at 8:42.
Roman Reigns says he’s the uncrowned Universal Champion. Tonight he’s going to qualify for Money in the Bank and then get his title.
Bayley wants to hug the Money in the Bank briefcase.
Breezango wants the golden ticket in the briefcase. Fandango: “I thought it was a contract.”
Goldust wants to go to Money in the Bank but here’s Jinder Mahal to interrupt. He wants to be in the triple threat match instead of Reigns so Angle gives him a match with Chad Gable. If Mahal wins, Angle will consider it.
No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide vs. Revival/Baron Corbin
But remember: Vince loves Corbin. Titus throws Wilder around to start before it’s off to Apollo for a suplex on Dawson. Corbin comes in to beat the heck out of Crews, including sending him face first into the apron. Dawson comes back in under more favorable circumstances with an abdominal stretch. That’s broken up and everything breaks down with Crews being low bridged to the floor. Corbin makes a blind tag as Jose hits the pop up punch on Dawson. End of Days knocks Jose silly for the pin at 4:59.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Ruby Riott vs. Ember Mon vs. Sasha Banks
Sasha and Ember get together to start and take Riott down, only to have Banks roll Moon up for two. Some rather athletic armdrags have Banks in trouble but Riott comes back in to send Sasha face first into the middle buckle. Sasha gets sent outside again as we hear about how successful Money in the Bank cash-ins have been. A double DDT plants Sasha and Moon for two each and it’s off to a chinlock on Moon. That’s broken up with a jawbreaker but here’s Sasha back in to run people over.
Banks stops to dive onto the Riott Squad though, allowing Riott to run her over. Moon hits a heck of a suicide dive for two on Riott as the fans are distracted by something in the crowd, which gets a YOU DESERVE IT chant. Back in and Banks gets two off a sunset flip with the Riott Squad coming in for the legal save. Cue Bayley to help Sasha but the Squad takes her out as well. Moon heads up top for an Eclipse to both Banks and Riott at the same time for the pin on Riott at 10:23.
Post break, Ember promises to rise up and grab the briefcase.
Video on Bobby Lashley.
Lashley gets a sitdown interview, talking about his family, including his parents and sisters. At one point his sister’s security towel (instead of security blanket) was taken away by some bullies so he took care of them. We wrap it up with Lashley saying hello to his sisters. So….Lashley is a family man when he’s not a monster. Got it. Not sure if I want it, but got it.
Sami and Kevin aren’t sure about trusting each other but Owens reluctantly agrees to have Sami’s back in the triple threat tonight. Sami is rather pleased.
Chad Gable vs. Jinder Mahal
Gable wastes no time in getting two off a rollup, only to have Jinder knock him down without much effort. We hit a bearhug of all things on Gable before Mahal sends him chest first into the corner. Gable pops up top with the moonsault press for a close two, followed by an even closer rollup for the same. Not that it matters as the superkick sets up the Khallas to give Jinder the pin at 4:12.
Post match Mahal beats on Gable some more
Alexa Bliss promises to win the briefcase to become champion and beat the bully Nia Jax once and for all.
Ascension promises to win the briefcase. Wait is there a tag team MITB match that I didn’t hear about?
Zack Ryder wants to be in a Money in the Bank qualifying match in his hometown when Mahal comes in to demand the triple threat be turned into a four way. Angle says Woo Woo Woo, the answer is no, bro. Ryder is pleased despite not being put in a match either.
Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler and Rhyno start things off but it’s quickly off to Slater for a headlock. Drew comes in and gets punched a few times but kicks Slater down to take over. Ziggler tags himself back in and it’s a superkick into a reverse Alabama Slam to drop Slater. That one superkick is enough for Ziggler so it’s the Claymore/Zig Zag combination for the pin on Slater at 2:39.
Here’s Elias to talk about Bobby Roode jumping him last night. He’s not happy with Roode but hang on because the fans like Rusev Day. Elias cuts them off and sings about how Roode isn’t glorious and this city sucks.
Bobby Roode vs. Elias
Roode wastes no time with an enziguri putting Elias on the floor as we take an early break. Back with Elias backdropping him and hammering away in the corner. We hit a Crossface of all things (closer to a Banks Statement actually) to keep Roode down but he snaps off a spinebuster for a breather.
A backbreaker stops Roode and Cole confirms that there will be eight people in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match with four from each show. Wait wouldn’t that suggest just two ladder matches? SWEET! Elias loads up a ram into the buckle but gets kicked away. Roode can’t follow up though, allowing Elias to talk some trash. He talks a bit too much though and it’s the Glorious DDT for the pin at 10:26.
Post break Roode says he hopes that’s enough to get into the Money in the Bank picture because winning the ladder match will be GLORIOUS.
Here’s Seth Rollins to talk about how he’s a fighting champion and wants someone else to face for the title. After last night against Miz, he needs a new challenge so it’s Open Challenge time.
Intercontinental Title: Mojo Rawley vs. Seth Rollins
Rollins is defending, we get Big Match Intros and Mojo is greeted with WE WANT RYDER chants. Rawley wastes no time in knocking Rollins outside and running him over, including a shoulder to send him into the barricade. Back from a break with Mojo throwing him down and talking more trash. A Downward Spiral into the middle buckle rocks Rawley and a clothesline puts him on the floor.
Back to back suicide dives hit Rawley and the Blockbuster gets two back inside. Rawley is right back with a spinebuster for two and frustration sets in at a rather fast pace. The low superkick gives Seth two but Mojo’s fireman’s carry faceplant gets the same. One heck of a Pounce knocks Seth into the corner but he’s right back up with a ripcord knee. A superkick to the ribs sets up the Stomp for the pin to retain at 10:56.
Finn Balor says the victory at Money in the Bank will be so much sweeter.
Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas vs. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt
Non-title and Axel/Dallas might be known as Stay Tuned. Bray runs Axel over to start as Graves goes over the history between Bray and Matt, going back thousands of years for as complete a version as possible. Axel blocks a Twist of Fate and DDTs Matt to give Dallas two. It’s off to Bray to run people over, followed by a kick to knock Dallas off the apron. Axel dives into a release Rock Bottom and a double Downward Spiral is good for the pin at 2:40.
Natalya promises to bring the MITB contract home to her cat.
Baron Corbin says he’s winning the contract again.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Roman Reigns vs. Finn Balor vs. Sami Zayn
Sami yells at Reigns to start and gets punched in the face to send him outside. Balor speeds things up and dropkicks Reigns down for two as the announcers debate how important Money in the Bank is compared to the rest of the year. More right hands drop Balor and Zayn as we take an early break. Back with Balor stomping on Reigns until Sami grabs a rollup for two.
There’s a Samoan drop to put Zayn on the floor with Balor on the opposite side. The fans start a TOO SWEET chant and the double beating is on to one of the strongest reactions of the night. Even Balor and Sami seem taken aback by the YES chants. The three head into the crowd and the fans are annoyed when Reigns comes back. A Helluva Kick knocks Reigns into the tech area and the other two head back inside to kill time until Reigns spears one of them.
The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Sami two but Balor fights back and they head to the floor. The fans start booing and I think you know what that means. Cue Reigns diving over the barricade to take Sami out but Balor drops Reigns again. Back in and Reigns hits the Superman Punch on Sami. The Sling Blade looks to set up the Coup de Grace but Reigns rolls away. Instead it’s another Superman Punch but here’s Mahal to trip Reigns. The distraction lets Sami hit the Helluva Kick to drop Reigns but Balor hit the shotgun dropkick and Coup de Grace on Sami for the pin at 15:25.
Results
Braun Strowman b. Kevin Owens – Running powerslam
Baron Corbin/Revival b. No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide – End of Days to Jose
Ember Moon b. Ruby Riott and Sasha Banks – Eclipse to Riott
Jinder Mahal b. Chad Gable – Khallas
Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler b. Heath Slater/Rhyno – Claymore/Zig Zag combination to Slater
Bobby Roode b. Elias – Glorious DDT
Seth Rollins b. Mojo Rawley – Stomp
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt b. Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas – Double Downward Spiral to Axel
Finn Balor b. Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns – Coup de Grace to Zayn
Tuesday
Smackdown
Date: May 8, 2018
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
It’s Money in the Bank season and qualifying matches are in the air. Last night’s Monday Night Raw saw three qualifying matches and tonight Smackdown will equal that amount with three matches already announced. Unfortunately they’re not the most intriguing matches but at least they’re getting them out of the way early. Let’s get to it.
Here’s Paige to open things up. After recapping Backlash (erg, enough), it’s time to talk about Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles. The match was on its way towards being a classic (not exactly) when the double low blow stopped things. We’ll be back to that later but for now it’s time to talk about Money in the Bank. She needs the best in the match so we’ll start….now.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Jeff Hardy vs. The Miz
Non-title. Miz cranks on the arm to start as the announcers talk about Miz’s history in the Money in the Bank match. Jeff sends him outside and hits Poetry in Motion against the barricade but it’s way too early for the Swanton. We take a break and come back with Jeff holding an armbar as the pace stays slow. The Reality Check gets two on Jeff but he elbows out of a Skull Crushing Finale attempt.
They head outside with Jeff getting the better of a slugout as the sleeves of Jeff’s shirt make me want a rainbow pop. The legdrop between the legs and the Twisting Stunner rock Miz but again he gets out of the way before the Swanton. Miz slams him neck first onto the apron and we take another break.
Back again with Jeff jawbreaking his way out of a chinlock and getting two off the Whisper in the Wind. A baseball slide knocks Miz to the floor but again he avoids the Swanton, this time with a good crotching. Instead it’s a sunset bomb for two as the back and forth continues. The Twist of Fate gets two and a corner dropkick sets up Hardiac Arrest (the other corner dropkick). Another Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton for real this time, but Miz rolls him up for the pin at 20:16.
Sheamus is eating Lucky Charms because it’s all that makes him feel better after losing to Xavier Woods last week. Cesaro compares it to a hawk losing a mouse between its claws. Sheamus: “I know! I was in the match!” Cesaro says he could have won so he agrees to face Woods tonight as well. He opens his bag and finds….pancakes. Sheamus finds the same thing and panic ensues. I like New Day a lot but WHY ARE PANCAKES FUNNY???
Sanity is coming.
We look at stills of Nakamura vs. Styles.
Renee Young talks to Nakamura, who isn’t cleared for competition tonight. In regards to the issues being over, no speak English. I mean, he knew it before but he’s forgotten it. As for AJ, they’re both nuts (laugh from the crowd) and they’re not finished.
Carmella screeches about beating Charlotte and it’s time to party. She’ll be celebrating next week in London. The Royal Family isn’t invited, just like Ric Flair isn’t invited. Speaking of Flair, did you know he has a daughter? Carmella beat her on Sunday.
Tye Dillinger says seven competitors down on the mat plus one contract plus one ladder plus one person left equals a perfect ten.
Naomi is going to make whomever is champion feel the Glow.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Charlotte vs. Peyton Royce
Before the match, Billie says Charlotte’s loss made her uncle overcome his stutter because he was laughing so hard. Peyton tries to imitate the look but it’s only funny when Charlotte does it. They lock up to start with Charlotte shoving her around. A toss to the floor takes us to an early break. Back with Peyton grabbing a chinlock before choking in the corner. A half nelson over the ropes with her legs has Charlotte in even more trouble and we hit another chinlock. Charlotte fights up with a neckbreaker by the hair but misses a big boot (but Peyton doesn’t sell it like Carmella did on Sunday).
A rollup gets two on Peyton and Charlotte dives onto Billie, leaving Peyton to grab a swinging neckbreaker on the floor. The referee gets distracted by Peyton so Billie can snap Charlotte’s neck across the top, setting up a spinning kick to the face for two. Charlotte is right back with the big boot, only to have the moonsault hit knees. Royce kicks the knee out for two but gets speared down. The Figure Eight makes Peyton tap at 12:56.
Daniel Bryan is ready to go win the Money in the Bank briefcase again because he cashed in the briefcase right here in Baltimore.
Shelton says he’ll win the briefcase.
Asuka says she’ll win the briefcase.
Xavier Woods vs. Cesaro
Hang on though as Big E. and Kofi have to throw out pancakes. Woods hits and moves but stops himself from running into the referee, allowing Cesaro to run him over. There’s a gutwrench suplex and we take a break. Back with Woods kicking him down and a wheelbarrow faceplant getting two. Sheamus gets on the apron but Big E. throws pancakes at him, allowing Kofi to hit a dive from the apron. The distraction lets Cesaro uppercut Woods out of the air for the pin at 7:07.
AJ Styles is still coming for Nakamura because it’s still about the title.
We see a bunch of destroyed action figures of tag teams. The Bludgeon Brothers say they have their own set of toys so come play with them. They smash the camera with their hammers.
Becky Lynch vs. Mandy Rose
In the back, Paige says Sonya Deville can’t go out there with Mandy. An early kick to the face gives Mandy two but a chinlock doesn’t last long. The Disarm-Her attempt sends Mandy outside so Becky catches her with the Bexploder instead. Becky’s bouncing kick out of the corner is broken up though and Mandy sends her throat first into the ropes for the pin at 2:26.
Andrade Cien Almas and Zelina Vega debut next week.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Daniel Bryan vs. Rusev
Bryan starts in on the legs early on and kicks the arm out for good measure. Some more kicks sends Rusev outside so Bryan tries the suicide dive, only to be caught and thrown over the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Rusev throwing him around some more but getting dropkicked in the corner.
The Spinning Rock Bottom doesn’t work so Rusev kicks him in the head for two instead. A quick YES Lock sends Rusev bailing to the ropes and Aiden English is rather relieved. Rusev heads outside so Bryan hits the running knee off the apron for two. Back in and the running knee misses, setting up a Machka Kick to give Rusev the completely clean pin at 11:20.
Bryan looks devastated to end the show. It certainly seems like they have something planned there.
Results
The Miz b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup
Charlotte b. Peyton Royce – Figure Eight
Cesaro b. Xavier Woods – Uppercut
Mandy Rose b. Becky Lynch – Neck snap across the top rope
Rusev b. Daniel Bryan – Machka Kick
Wednesday
NXT
Date: May 9, 2018
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Percy Watson, Mauro Ranallo
We’re in that odd period of NXT as we’re too far away from the next Takeover to really start building there but too far from the previous Takeover to deal with fallout. NXT is capable of pulling off something in the meantime though and that should be more than enough to bridge the gap. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Ricochet to get things going. Everywhere he’s gone in his career, he’s tried to have people talking about him. Over Wrestlemania weekend, his goal was to leave people talking. You can call it confidence or cockiness but it’s who he is. Now the only thing on his mind is the NXT Championship but here’s Velveteen Dream to interrupt. Dream says no no no and wants to know who gave Ricochet the authority to come out here and ask for title shots. He needs Ricochet to take a step back and asks about the One and Only nickname.
Dream questions if Ricochet makes things look good because Ricochet is looking at the one experience. Ricochet can jump around all he wants but remember he’ll land in the back of the line behind the Dream. Ricochet says Dream is a lot, but he’s not Ricochet so enjoy the spotlight while you can. That’s fine with Dream, because anything Ricochet can do, Dream can do better. Ricochet: “Prove it.” Dream teases throwing a punch but drops to the mat instead, leaving after Ricochet winks at him. I could go for this feud, but I’m not sure where Dream goes if he loses another big match.
Raul Mendoza vs. EC3
Mendoza grabs a headlock to start, followed by a missile dropkick. EC3 is right back with a reverse bulldog driver (I’m not sure how much that would hurt) and sends him face first into a buckle. A TKO is good for the pin (with two hands on the chest for the cover) at 2:44.
Post match EC3 says he doesn’t care about losing at Takeover because adversity makes a man. The only thing you’ll see out of him going forward is victory after victory. Then this place will be NX3.
Last week Oney Lorcan and Danny Burch told Pete Dunne that they don’t like him but they’ll have his back because they don’t like Undisputed Era either. Dunne leaves without saying anything. That’s about what I expected.
Dakota Kai vs. Vanessa Bourne
Kai hits a running dropkick but misses a running version in the corner. Bourne is right back with a kick to the ribs and a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker for two. We hit the double arm crank for a bit before Kai is back up with more kicks. Now the running kick in the corner rocks Bourne, followed by a running sunset flip into a Backstabber (cool) for the pin on Bourne at 2:36.
Post match Shayna Baszler comes out and Kai is terrified. Shayna drops the title and chokes Bourne off as Kai leaves in fear (with Baszler staring her down) instead of making a save. When Kai stands up for herself, many months from now, the pop is going to be unholy.
Back from a break with Kai being unsure what just happened. Baszler comes in and tells her to do something about it. Kai still can’t move so Shayna laughs and leaves. Kai hears more laughter and Nikki Cross is hanging from piece of metal and laughing at her too. Now that’s kind of interesting.
Heavy Machinery vs. War Raiders
Rowe and Dozovic start things off and it breaks down into a four way forearm slugout in no time. Knight gets sent outside and Dozovic gets kneed in the ribs. He’s still able to suplex Hanson down so it’s off to Knight vs. Rowe. Hanson is right back in with a suicide dive to Dozovic, leaving Knight to take Fallout for the pin at 2:52. That’s all this needed to be.
We look back at TM61 cheating to defeat the Street Profits.
The Profits are training because this is serious.
Tommaso Ciampa vs. Kassius Ohno
Still no music for Ciampa. Ohno takes it to the floor early on and sends Ciampa into the barricade. One heck of a right hand sends Ciampa back into the ring but he snaps Ohno’s throat across the top rope. A running knee to the head rocks Ohno again and a kick to the side of the head puts him down as Ciampa asks if Ohno is Gargano’s big brother. Ohno blocks a chop and hits a bicycle kick. It’s time to go simple as Ohno stands on Ciampa’s head and then drops an exposed knee onto Ciampa’s damaged eye.
A shot to the face knocks something out of Ciampa’s mouth and puts on a cravate choke into something like a Bubba Bomb (with a cravate instead of a full nelson) for two. Ciampa is right back and pulls at Ohno’s eye, setting up a running knee to the back of the head for a near fall of his own (I thought that was it). A clothesline sets up a neckbreaker into a faceplant to put Ohno away at 9:32. Mauro is LIVID that Ciampa won.
Post match Ciampa hits Ohno in the back of the head with his knee brace and chokes him with it. Ciampa shouts that he broke Johnny’s spirit and broke Candace’s heart so the Gargano fairy tale is over.
Results
EC3 b. Raul Mendoza – TKO
Dakota Kai b. Vanessa Bourne – Sunset Backstabber
War Raiders b. Heavy Machinery – Fallout to Knight
Tommaso Ciampa b. Kassius Ohno – Neckbreaker into a faceplant
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2018
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh Matthews
We’re still dealing with the Redemption fallout while also starting the build towards Slammiversary. Tonight’s big deal is Eli Drake cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase for the World Title shot against Pentagon Jr. You also have Austin Aries roaming around near the title and some other people aren’t far behind. Let’s get to it.
We open with Josh Matthews in the studio talking about Sami Callihan wrecking a recent ceremony in Don Callis’ honor. Apparently Sami is livid at Callis for throwing in the towel to save Eddie Edwards at the WrestleCon show and wanted revenge.
There’s currently a meeting going on regarding Sami’s future. We’ll cut into whatever to let you know the outcome.
It’s off to the ceremony in Toronto with Anthony Carelli (Santino Marella) giving Callis an award. Cue Sami to attack Callis and beat him down while busting him open. Fine angle, but Callis has been on camera around here for less than a month. That’s quite a lot of faith to bet on fans caring about something like this.
The regular opening video talks about Drake vs. Pentagon.
Opening sequence.
Andrew Everett/DJZ vs. LAX
Santana and DJZ start things off with a rather speedy exchange until Ortiz comes in for some double teaming to take over. It’s off to Everett for a failed fireman’s carry gutbuster as Santana is keeping his eyes open for anyone trying to interfere. Santana’s cutter gives Everett two and Josh gives us updates on the meeting: it’s still going on. I’ll take nothing new Josh over nitwit/stupid/self praising Josh. Everett rolls over into a kick to Santana before rolling over to DJZ for the tag.
DJZ sends them together so Ortiz DDTs Santana in that spot that is still so stupidly contrived. A double kick takes DJZ down but a double kick takes LAX down. Everything breaks down and DJZ tornado DDTs Ortiz, only to walk into a Santana superkick. Everett hits a very good looking top rope Asai moonsault to drop Ortiz but Ortiz is up a few moments later for a suicide flip dive. The Street Sweeper is broken up and DJZ rolls Ortiz up for the pin at 8:28.
Grado is still waiting on his girlfriend but Joseph Park says he smells a rat. Cue Katie Lea Burchill/Winter (now known as Katarina) name she’s going by now to hug Grado and say she’ll see “James” (Park) later.
Austin Aries wants Eli Drake to win tonight because he knows he can beat him.
Rohit Raju vs. Grado
Before Josh can say it: WHO IS THE DESI HIT SQUAD AND WHY SHOULD I CARE? Raju jumps Grado while he gives Katarina his hat but can’t suplex the rather rotund one. Some running boots to the face in the corner give Raju two and we hit the chinlock. Grado is back with a side slam and a falling splash, which Josh calls unique. That would be true, if Ortiz didn’t do the same thing in the previous match.
We go split screen for a second to show that the meeting is still going. Grado takes too much time with his dancing punches and gets kneed in the face. A swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker gets two but Grado is right back with an elbow to the head and the Cannonball for the pin at 5:39.
Joseph Park is the latest X victim. Given that one of his finishers is called Weapon X, Cage is a possible suspect.
Video on Tessa Blanchard, who has wrestling in her blood and has to be the best.
Eli Drake and Scott Steiner are in the back with Drake saying tonight, he becomes the new belt collector. Steiner doesn’t like the idea of Drake saying he’ll do this himself.
Drago vs. Aerostar vs. Taiji Ishimori vs. El Hijo Del Fantasma
Lucha rules and the winner gets a future X-Division Title shot. Now that’s all I ask. Ishimori and Fantasma are sent to the floor in about thirty seconds, leaving Drago and Aerostar to trade covers. The other two replace them in a hurry and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Ishimori. A good looking middle rope moonsault to the floor drops Drago and we take a break.
Back with Drago kicking Fantasma in the mask and hitting an ankle scissors to take Fantasma down again. Ishimori comes back in with a Regal roll for two on Drago. All four get back in and Fantasma superkicks Drago down. Ishimori drops Fantasma as well and all four are down for a bit. Drago is sent outside for a dive from Ishimori, followed by a dive each from Fantasma and Aerostar. Back in and Aerostar powerbombs Ishimori into the corner for two but the Thrill of the Kill gives Fantasma the pin on Aerostar for the pin at 16:43.
Eddie Edwards goes into the meeting and demands that Callihan not be fired. Management tells him to do what he has to do away from the Impact Zone.
From House of Hardcore in Fort Wayne, Indiana.
Moose vs. Kongo Kong
Joined in progress with Moose hitting a dropkick but getting thrown to the floor. Kong follows him out and whips Moose into the barricade as Josh talks about Callihan and Edwards over and over. Kong’s waistlock doesn’t get him very far so he sends Moose shoulder first into the post. Moose switches to a more simplistic offense by shouldering him down but Jimmy Jacobs comes in with a chair for the DQ at 6:08.
KM wants Fallah Bahh to become the best man that he can and we get shots of them screaming into the camera.
Montage of KM training Bahh to make him lose weight while eating various bad food. Bahh passes out.
From Pro Wrestling Noah and if what I can find is correct, this is from June 4, 2017.
Brian Cage vs. Takashi Sugiura
Joined in progress with Cage hitting a delayed vertical suplex, followed by a standing moonsault for two. Josh: “If the Avengers ever needed a new member, and they do after Infinity War, they should get Brian Cage.” That’s getting rather close to a spoiler. Cage hits the apron suplex for two more but Sugiura knees him down and hits some running knees in the corner.
A superplex attempt is broken up but Sugiura snaps off a top rope hurricanrana to put both guys down. There’s a buckle bomb to drop Sugiura and an F5 gets two. A German suplex and running knee give Sugiura the same but Cage blasts him with the Tornado Claw for two more. The Drill Claw is good for the pin on Sugiura at 7:49.
From Destination X 2009, Suicide wins the X-Division Title.
Allie is looking in a mirror and has flashbacks to last week. She finds a doll with a note pinned to it and opens it up. While we don’t see what it says, Allie looks a little disturbing when she looks in the mirror, almost like something is trying to take control of her.
Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Pentagon Jr.
Pentagon is defending and Steiner isn’t here with Drake. They trade catchphrases to start and Drake sends him into the corner to stand on his head. Back to back Sling Blades give Pentagon two as Aries is watching in the back, banana in hand. A powerslam cuts Pentagon off as we’re told that next week, House of Hardcore will present Edwards vs. Callihan in a street fight. At least there’s a storyline reason for going to another promotion this time.
We hit the chinlock for a bit before Pentagon headscissors Drake out to the floor. A superkick to the ribs knocks Drake out of the air and the Codebreaker out of the corner gets two. The Gravy Train doesn’t work and Drake misses a top rope Lionsault, allowing Pentagon to hit the Pentagon Driver for the pin at 7:09.
Results
Andrew Everett/DJZ b. LAX – Victory roll to Ortiz
Grado b. Rohit Raju – Cannonball
El Hijo Del Fantasma b. Aerostar, Taiji Ishimori and Drago – Thrill of the Kill to Aerostar
Moose b. Kongo Kong via DQ when Jimmy Jacobs interfered
Brian Cage b. Takashi Sugiura – Drill Claw
Pentagon Jr. b. Eli Drake – Pentagon Driver
Friday
Nothing.
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Braun Strowman b. Kevin Owens – Running powerslam
Baron Corbin/Revival b. No Way Jose/Titus Worldwide – End of Days to Jose
Ember Moon b. Ruby Riott and Sasha Banks – Eclipse to Riott
Jinder Mahal b. Chad Gable – Khallas
Drew McIntyre/Dolph Ziggler b. Heath Slater/Rhyno – Claymore/Zig Zag combination to Slater
Bobby Roode b. Elias – Glorious DDT
Seth Rollins b. Mojo Rawley – Stomp
Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt b. Curtis Axel/Bo Dallas – Double Downward Spiral to Axel
Finn Balor b. Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns – Coup de Grace to Zayn
Smackdown
The Miz b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup
Charlotte b. Peyton Royce – Figure Eight
Cesaro b. Xavier Woods – Uppercut
Mandy Rose b. Becky Lynch – Neck snap across the top rope
Rusev b. Daniel Bryan – Machka Kick
NXT
EC3 b. Raul Mendoza – TKO
Dakota Kai b. Vanessa Bourne – Sunset Backstabber
War Raiders b. Heavy Machinery – Fallout to Knight
Tommaso Ciampa b. Kassius Ohno – Neckbreaker into a faceplant
Impact Wrestling
Andrew Everett/DJZ b. LAX – Victory roll to Ortiz
Grado b. Rohit Raju – Cannonball
El Hijo Del Fantasma b. Aerostar, Taiji Ishimori and Drago – Thrill of the Kill to Aerostar
Moose b. Kongo Kong via DQ when Jimmy Jacobs interfered
Brian Cage b. Takashi Sugiura – Drill Claw
Pentagon Jr. b. Eli Drake – Pentagon Driver