klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Sorensen has feeling in his arms and can move them, but his legs are all still tingling and he has no movement in them yet.
Update: Sorensen has a C-1 vertebrae injury.
Smackdown got a 2.2.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 2012
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
It's the final show before Elimination Chamber which is the final major show before Wrestlemania. That being said, the Chamber is pretty much set and it appears that one way or another, Punk and Jericho will be feuding after the PPV. It should be interesting to see what the final push is here and if they add any other matches to the card beforehand. Let's get to it.
We open with the ending of last week's show where Kane got in Eve's face. Kane says that tonight, Cena embraces the hate and someone takes a ride in the ambulance.
We open in the arena....with a debate. All six of the Raw guys in the Chamber are going to have a debate. Punk is asked how he thinks he'll overcome the odds when he's interrupted by Ace. Ace is back and that's about it. As for the question, Punk says this debate will NOT end in violence. As for old snickleprints, aka Clown Shoes, congratulations for maintaining power. Punk thinks Ace must have something like beastiality pictures of the Board members to keep his job. He'll win because he's the best in the world.
Vickie asks for no booing and Dolph says he's better than everyone. Truth says if he's elected, he'll trade Vickie and Dolph for Hornswoggle and a box of spiders. Ziggler: HOW DO YOU WORK HERE??? Truth will also make it legally required to say WHAT after every line of the Pledge of Allegiance. Now back to the issue at hand, he's going to stomp that box of spiders and make them into Spider Stew, which is high in protein and low in carbs. With Little Jimmy by his side, he'll drink the stew which will make him strong enough to win the Chamber.
Miz gets to follow that. He says he was the main event of Wrestlemania last year. As for his opponents, Kofi is an afterthought, Truth is insane and should be replaced by Little Jimmy. Punk will melt faster than his ice cream bars. Ziggler has only scored with an old woman....and the buzzer rings before Miz can get to Jericho. He keeps talking and the buzzer keeps going.
Kofi says everything can change in one night and he's tired of being an afterthought. We actually get a Kofi chant. Jericho says he's surrounded by neophytes and that he's the best in the world. He's been in more Chambers and eliminated more people than anyone ever has. He won the last time he was in it too. Punk should just give him the title right now. Punk says he was thinking of the time when Jericho finished 7th on Dancing With The Stars.
Dolph goes off and says this is stupid. Truth says he won't be talked down to by a man named after Flipper, and we get some dolphin sounds. Jerry says we're getting all six of them in singles matches tonight, so let's start with Jericho vs. Kofi. Jericho shoves his podium over and walks up to Punk. Punk holds up the title and Kofi kicks Jericho's head off.
Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston
This starts after a break. Jericho is still shaken up so Kofi clotheslines him to the outside and hits a suicide dive. Jericho goes face first into the table and they head back in. Chris gets in some right hands and a senton backsplash for two. Off to a modified chinlock but Kofi comes back with a cross body. Jerry makes fun of Jericho's statements that he came up with all those ideas. Kofi tries a springboard dropkick but lands in the Walls. He makes the ropes after a good while but pops up with Trouble in Paradise which gets a very delayed two. Jericho gets up and the Codebreaker ends this clean at 5:21.
We get a clip from the Rumble with Ryder getting Tombstoned.
Cena is with Ryder in the back and Ryder is in a neckbrace and wheelchair. Ryder has flowers for Eve though because he can't stay away from her. Cena offers to bring her here and keep watch.
Otunga says Ace isn't the permanent GM but he has an idea to make him GM of both shows.
We recap Big show vs. Orton on Smackdown and get some post show bonus footage where Show chokeslammed Orton.
Here's Bryan for commentary I believe.
Big Show vs. Randy Orton
This also starts after a break. Show throws Orton around as the size is just too much for Randy. Orton is all shaken as we take a break. Back with Randy holding a sleeper. He jumps on Show's back and Show goes down to one knee. Show breaks it up but walks into a great dropkick. Orton covers but is launched to the floor on the kickout. Show glares at Bryan who Cole has been complimenting all match.
Another dropkick drapes Show on the top rope and it's a SUPER elevated DDT. Cole calls it extra vintage. How can it be vintage when it's never happened before? Orton loads up the RKO and they horribly botch it with Orton never even leaving his feet. Show tries a chokeslam but Randy escapes and hits a good RKO as Bryan runs in for the DQ at 7:21.
Bryan lays them both out with the belt post match.
Here's Shawn for his big promo with HHH. Shawn talks about how people on Twitter ask him why he always shows up at this time of year. BECAUSE IT'S WRESTLEMANIA!!! He says he can't be the Main Event anymore, but he can be Mr. Hall of Fame now.
Last week he was watching Raw (and yes he gets TV in the middle of nowhere place that he lives) and was waiting for HHH to say yes to Undertaker. Shawn heard him say no and then called Ace, saying he needed to talk to HHH. Then he thought HHH was just messing with the people and Undertaker. Shawn calls out HHH and even plays air guitar during the entrance.
Here's the Game and they hug. They throw up an X as required by law. HHH says it's great to see Shawn who has managed to stop hunting wabbits with Elmer Fudd. However, HHH isn't going to face Taker at the PPV. Shawn saw Undertaker leave last year and HHH know he'd have to end Taker to beat him, and that's not the guy he is anymore. Shawn says he's stuck by HHH forever, even when he married that girl. Did that make HHH one of them, as in a corporate sellout?
The Game doesn't like that. He says it's called investing in the future. HHH says Shawn can't understand it so they're not having this argument here. Shawn says he's a simple guy and it's hard for him to understand this corporate stuff. However, he knows a coward when he sees one. No matter how much money you put around it, a coward is still a coward. The fans chant one more match and HHH leaves. Shawn says yeah walk away like a coward.
HHH freaks and comes back, saying Shawn can't understand what's going on. Shawn sits on his ranch with his wife and kids but HHH has real life responsibilities. All of this is going to be his and it means its his responsibility. You can't look at Taker like an opponent because you can't. Undertaker is a brand who is good for business. Their breed is gone and there's a new one in town. Only Taker is left and HHH won't be the one to end that era.
HHH goes nuclear on Shawn, saying that Shawn can't push HHH to do what Shawn couldn't get done. Shawn says that's a great speech that would work on most people, but he's at peace with where he's at. HHH has no peace though. He needs to look Shawn in the eye and say he doesn't want to end the Streak. HHH starts to walk away but Shawn pulls him back and says look him in the ey. There goes the jacket and Shawn puts the mic down. HHH looks him in the eye and says no. Shawn looks like he's about to cry. He leaves and HHH stands alone in the ring.
He goes to leave.....and a gong sounds. We get another promo video from Taker saying this isn't over. Taker's hands are seen pulling out a nice and cutting his hair. He says keep your pity and give me what is mine: immortality. Back in the arena HHH pulls his tie off and we go to a break. WOW that was good.
R-Truth vs. Dolph Ziggler
Dolph takes over to start and hits a dropkick. He struts around and does his handstand in the chinlock. There's a slam and Ziggy does his situps. Truth however rolls him up for a pin at 2:35.
Santino comes to see Ryder and offers him a breath mint. This isn't funny.
Tamina Snuka vs. Brie Bella
The name change should help. Beth is on commentary for this and will defend the title on Sunday against Tamina. Brie takes over quickly but Tamina hits a jawbreaker to escape. Snuka hits Nikki and then a Samoan Drop to set up the Superfly Splash for the pin at 1:25. Just how I like my Divas matches: nice and short.
Video on The Rock. He's a movie star you know.
We go to Cena for a reaction on that video but we hear a woman screaming. It's Eve who is being thrown into the ambulance by Kane. Cena comes to her rescue but the door is locked. Kane gets back up and slams Cena into said door before getting into the driver's seat. Cena manages to get up and open the door and Eve dives to him. Kane drives off and Eve kisses him. Cena asks what that was for. We pan over to Ryder who is STUNNED and wants to know what that was.
After a break Ryder is wheeling away and is sorry to see that happens. She just wants to be friends. Ryder is disgusted and wheels away.
CM Punk vs. The Miz
Somehow it's 10:48 already. This show has flown by and in a good way. Poor Zack is the #1 trending topic in the world. Miz takes over to start and works on the left arm. Reality Check is countered and Punk kicks Miz's head off. Notice that Punk shakes the feeling back into his arm. That's called selling and it's a GOOD THING. Punk strikes away but the arm isn't working right.
Miz pounds on the arm some more so Punk uses his right arm and legs. The knee and a right arm bulldog look to set up the GTS. Miz escapes into the short DDT for two and there's the running clothesline in the corner. He comes off the top but Punk grabs a powerslam for two. The Macho Elbow (presumably) is broken up and Miz loads up a superplex. Punk comes back and hits the elbow for two. Miz pops up and tries the Finale but Punk reverses into the Anaconda Vice for the tap at 5:00.
The ambulance is back.
Post break here's Cena. He says there was an awkward moment back there and for what it's worth Zack, he's sorry. This was Kane's plan all along: to turn everyone against him and make him embrace the hate. It's a solid plan and it would have worked on anybody else. He's not anybody else though. For some reason people think there's an evil switch he can just turn on and off. The fans chant that they don't hate him.
Cena says it's been like six years and he's comfortable in his own skin. Cena says he rises above hate and maybe they were chanting we all hate you. The people can think he's a lady part having Fruity Pebbles guy, which draws a Fruity Pebbles chant. He says he'll keep adapting and winning. This Sunday, Kane leaves in an ambulance. As for Dwayne (Rocky chant), Cena has a message for him for Wrestlemania.
Hold that though as here's Ryder in the wheelchair. He gets up on his crutches and very slowly walks down to the ring. Cena tries to explain but Ryder knocks the mic out of his hands. Cena tries to explain again but Ryder slaps him. John takes the shirt off and the fans chant broken back. Ryder says Cena was never his friend and goes to hit Cena again.
Cena blocks it and pulls his own fist back but Ryder falls to the floor. Ryder says stay away from him and leaves. Cena didn't hit him. Kane pops up on screen and says that Cena has embraced the hate. Sunday will be his last match until Mania because Cena will have his body leaving the WWE in an ambulance. Kane asks for a round of applause for Cena.
Kane then pops up behind Ryder and SHOVES HIM OFF THE STAGE IN HIS WHEELCHAIR! Cena panics and says get help which is there almost immediately. Eve comes out showing off some nice crack and is all worried. The fans chant for Cena for some reason. Ryder is taken out to end the show.
Results
Chris Jericho b. Kofi Kingston Codebreaker
Randy Orton b. Big Show via DQ when Daniel Bryan interfered
R-Truth b. Dolph Ziggler Small Package
Tamina Snuka b. Brie Bella Superfly Splash
CM Punk b. The Miz Anaconda Vice
Tuesday
Raw got a 3.0, down again.
Orton was hurt by Bryan's belt shot and is out of the Chamber. No word on a replacement yet.
Wednesday
Sorensen is out of the hospital and is expected to make a full recovery. No word on when he'll be back but it's going to be a long time.
NXT
Date: February 15, 2012
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Commentators: Josh Matthews, William Regal
Fifty shows. We've somehow hit FIFTY shows. There have been 104 shows in the history of NXT and nearly half of them have been in this season. Anyway, nothing of note has been happening lately as the rookies (can you be classified as a rookie in your second year on the show?) have been losing more lately other than Titus. Oh and Hawkins/Reks beat up Striker last week. Let's get to it.
Here are Hawkins and Reks to open the show. Hawkins says it should have been their moment but instead it wasn't. Reks says they should be on the main shows instead of begging for matches here. Hawkins runs down Striker and wants to know what a host does around here. The NXT roster is full of talented superstars so it needs change. He pulls back his vest and reveals an Obama style shirt.
Here's Striker who says this is all ridiculous. He's given everyone a chance to shine. Hawkins says come here and say that but Striker says he isn't as stupid as Hawkins looks. Striker has called an old friend to help him. Call him a substitute if you will. And it's Regal. Regal is now in charge of things, at least for tonight. Hawkins has a match right now and Reks is banned from ringside. Reks: Why me? Regal: I don't like you you scruffy thing. Go and have a bath or something.
Curt Hawkins vs. Tyson Kidd
Awesome sequence to start as Hawkins throws him over the top but Kidd skins the cat. Hawkins slides under him and Kidd teases a dive. He lands on the apron and runs to the post, jumps around it and catches Hawkins in a hurricanrana. That looked great. Kidd is looking more muscular now. Hawkins rams him into the apron and we take a break.
Back with Hawkins getting two off a suplex. Hawkins is wrestling in the shirt which is a better look for him. Hawkins works on a chinlock which is broken pretty quickly. Kidd fires off some kicks and sends Hawkins to the outside. Tyson hits a slingshot dropkick and a running knee smash off the apron which gets two back inside. Hawkins counters what looked like a suplex into an inverted DDT for two.
Kidd goes to the apron and tries a sunset flip but spins in mid-air to land in a reverse victory roll for two. He tries a Rocker Dropper but Hawkins suplexes out of it which also gets two. We go to the corner and Kidd fights out of a superplex attempt. In a great and subtle move, Kidd uses a victory roll (ala Bret, who Regal said Kidd had been training with) into the Sharpshooter for the submission at 7:37.
Titus O'Neil vs. Yoshi Tatsu
The way the announcers are talking, Regal is permanent boss. The power controls to start this power vs. speed match. Titus yells at Yoshi that no one cares about Yoshi because it's all about Titus. Yoshi takes more punishment but avoids a charge in the corner and fires off some kicks. A running knee to the chest gets two. Not that it matters as Titus hits him in the back and a very good Clash of the Titus gets the pin at 3:22.
Titus yells at Regal that he wants competition in the form of Alex Riley. Here's Riley who says he'll come say it to Titus' face. Alex says let's do it right now and Titus rolls to the floor to escape.
Alicia and Kaitlyn want Bateman and Maxine to break up. Kaitlyn insists they're just friends. Curtis comes up to hit on them. A guy with flowers and candy comes up after the girls leave saying he's looking for Bateman. Curtis says that's him and there's a card for Maxine. He says it's like stealing candy from a Bateman.
Percy Watson vs. Michael McGillicutty
McGillicutty has a big beard now. Michael takes him to the mat to start but Percy nips up. I don't think the crowd knows who Michael is. Whoever he is he hooks a quick chinlock and Percy is in trouble. Percy comes back with a modified version of the spinning DDT Rock did when he was Rocky Maivia. A dropkick and clothesline put Michael down but the Heisman lands on knees. Not that it matters as Persecution ends this at 4:02.
Maxine finds a box of chocolates addressed to Kaitlyn and signed by Derrick. She isn't happy.
Raw ReBound is about Cena/Kane/Ryder.
Kaitlyn is on commentary for this.
Derrick Bateman/Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater/Johnny Curtis
Kaitlyn says that she and Bateman watch Full House together. Justin and Curtis start off and Curtis is kicked to the outside. Bateman dives on Curtis and we take a break. Back with Slater working on Justin's knees. Apparently Curtis has been asking Regal if he was breastfed. Ok then. Curtis works over the knees as Regal hits on Kaitlyn. Justin gets two off a quick rollup. There's the hot tag to Bateman and he cleans house. Everything breaks down and the falling bulldog (the Sweet Meat Sizzler according to Kaitlyn) gets the pin on Slater at 5:37.
Post match Maxine comes out and hits Kaitlyn with the chocolates. She rams Kaitlyn into the barricade and Bateman tries to stop her so she shoves him too. Bateman carries Maxine out as Curtis smiles.
Results
Tyson Kidd b. Curt Hawkins Sharpshooter
Titus O'Neil b. Yoshi Tatsu Clash of the Titus
Percy Watson b. Michael McGillicutty Persecution
Derrick Bateman/Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater/Johnny Curtis Sweet Meat Sizzler to Slater
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay
We're back in Orlando which means the crowds have gotten a lot worse again. Roode is still the champion after Sting had to count the pin on Sunday in a redo of Summerslam 1997. And before anyone complains, no I'm not saying that's a bad thing. 14 years is more than enough for an angle to be repeated. Anyway, we start towards Victory Road tonight. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap video of the two main events from the PPV. The other is Garrett vs. Gunner if you're confused.
Here's Roode to open the show. He says that the fans are chanting Rooooooooooode so loudly that he needs to hear his introduction again. Roode talks about overcoming everyone, including Jeff Hardy. As for Sting, Sting has been pointing his finger at Roode since Roode won the title. After Sunday, that finger should be pointed at Sting because it was him that counted the pin to keep the belt on Bobby.
Cue Sting who says it was Sting that was selfish on Sunday because he let his anger get the better of him. If hurt the outcome of the match and Jeff got screwed. He's here tonight to make things right with Hardy. He's glad Roode is a fighting champion because tonight, it's Roode vs. Hardy. There's no time limit and no DQ. Oh and it starts NEXT.
Brandon Jacobs of the New York Giants is here.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode
Jeff charges and attacks Roode before the introductions can be made. Roode catches him in Percy Watson's Persecution for two. Roode is sent to the floor where Jeff hits a dive and a pair of chair shots. This isn't falls count anywhere. Roode is rammed into various metal objects and has his suplex countered into one by Hardy. It's been about 95% Jeff so far. They go towards the ramp and Hardy cracks him in the back with a chair. Hardy whips him into the apron twice and signals to the fans for something. Roode uses the distraction to get in a punch to the ribs.
Jeff counters a whip to send Roode's knees into the steps. He uses said steps to make a platform and hits Poetry in Motion onto the champ against the railing. With both guys down we take a break. Back with Hardy getting two off his front suplex. He loads up the Whisper in the Wind but Roode shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch him. Roode takes it to the floor again and tries a piledriver on the ramp but Jeff counters with a backdrop.
They go up to the stage with Hardy in control again. Hardy throws Roode off the stage but it wasn't a huge crash as Roode is up pretty quickly. Also the stage isn't as high. Jeff dives off the ramp with a clothesline. Twist of Fate is countered as Roode shoves Jeff into the stage. Roode's charge misses and both guys are down.
This is random but they're near the announce desk so it popped into my head. Tazz isn't live in the arena and is doing this on a voiceover due to the death in his family. Hardy takes him back to the ring and takes his shirt off. Out of nowhere comes Kurt Angle who whips him into the steps. Roode pops up and hits the spear (of course) for the pin at 16:45.
Roode says he won when Sting comes in. Sting says he cheated the system and says he's not done yet. Roode is going to defend against the winner of the #1 contenders match tonight.
Eric Young has a guitar and says that he'll get ODB back tonight. He also talks about shoot fighting and having his driver's license taken away.
Sting talks to two people about getting a shot at Roode. He asks if they're in and the people are revealed as Ray and Storm. They both say they should be world champion and the match is on.
We get a video of the Sorensen injury from Sunday. The current word is that Sorensen will be out for a year at least. He is however moving his arms and I believe legs as well.
Zema Ion/Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore
Aries and Moore start things off. Aries takes him down with a fast headlock takedown and then a dropkick. Ion tags himself in to tick the champ off. Shannon kicks everyone down and Aries is knocked to the floor. There's a baseball slide and Asai Moonsault which kind of misses as Moore lands on his feet and Aries falls a few seconds later.
Shannon picks up Ion's hairspray which gets him a dropkick to the back. Shelley knocks Ion to the floor and wants a tag. Here's Alex who misses a double boot and has Sliced Bread broken up. Aries dropkicks him in the back of the head and loads up the brainbuster but Ion tags himself in. Shelley escapes the brainbuster but falls into a rollup by Ion at 4:10.
Speaking of heel vs. heel, Gail and Madison are coming to the ring and Madison wants to chill things out between then.
Battle Royal
Brooke Tessmacher, Tara, Sarita, Rosita, Winter, Angelina Love, ODB, Mickie James, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne
Winner gets the shot at Gail at Victory Road. Before the match, Madison praises Gail for giving everyone a chance to win right now. Madison sits at ringside with Gail. Winter and Tessmacther are out quickly. ODB threw both of them out and she tosses Rosita onto them. Mickie goes after her and has some better luck. She tries a headscissors but three other girls knock them both to the apron.
Mickie goes up top and ODB knocks her out. Everyone rams into ODB to knocker her to the floor and we're down to Tara, Velvet, Angelina, Sarita and Madison who is on the floor. Tara is knocked out by Sarita. Angelina and Sarita team up against Velvet who fights out as well as she can. Velvet fights both of them as well as she can but can't put Sarita out.
The alliance seems to break down but they hit a double elbow to put Velvet down. Madison hasn't been in the ring yet so she's still in this. Botox Injection puts Velvet down and Sarita says now put her out. Angelina goes to do that and Sarita tosses her. Salsa dancing abounds. Sarita charges at her but Velvet ducks to put her out. Madison runs in to throw out Velvet for the win at 6:30.
Storm is all fired up.
The new tag champs say they proved their greatness by doing what they said they'd do. It's a rematch next week.
We recap the Garrett vs. Gunner match from the PPV where Garrett fought hard but lost.
Here's Immortal, who is now Flair, Gunner, Bischoff, and Chelsea if you remember her. She's hot if nothing else. Eric says Chelsea wanted back in after seeing Garrett's loss on Sunday. Champagne is brought in along with cigars. Eric says get a dog as a dog catcher, but never come close to wrestling again. He wishes Garrett the best in all of his future endeavors.
The host of some MMA show talks about MMA.
Eric Young talks to ODB who doesn't want to hear it. He plays a song on his guitar called the Ode To ODB. She laughs at it and spanks him. This isn't funny, as usual.
James Storm vs. Bully Ray
It's 10:30 so there's either something after this or we're going to have a long match. Ray is way too proud of his calves. Feeling out process to start and Storm armdrags him down. Hebnar trips over him and Ray works on Storm's knee. Ray even takes the boot off of Storm's foot to work it over even better. More leg work follows which has been the focus of the match so far. Ray keeps on the leg as we take a break.
Back with Storm trying a comeback but Ray dropkicks the knee out for two. Ray punches the knee and talks trash, which gets him a punch in the face. Codebreaker puts Ray in the corner. He comes out with a big boot but Storm ducks underneath and hits the Last Call for the pin and the #1 contendership at 12:10.
Storm has a beer bash post match and gives Brandon Jacobs a beer as well. Ray jumps Storm during the celebration and gets in Jacobs' face. He takes a drink from the beer and spits it in Jacobs' face. Jacobs shoves him down and wants to fight. Storm and security pull him back and D'Lo Brown looks like he's trying to hold back a small bus. Jacobs and Storm get in the ring and celebrate.
Storm and Jacobs say bring it Bully. Jacobs will be back next week.
Sting wants to talk to Roode face to face. Roode comes out and announces Roode vs. Storm in the cage at Lockdown. Roode kicks Sting in the balls for that. He takes Sting's sunglasses and hits him with the belt to open him up. So....Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road?
Results
Bobby Roode b. Jeff Hardy Spear
Zema Ion/Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore Rollup to Shelley
Madison Rayne won a battle royal last eliminating Velvet Sky
James Storm b. Bully Ray Last Call
Sorensen has feeling in his arms and can move them, but his legs are all still tingling and he has no movement in them yet.
Update: Sorensen has a C-1 vertebrae injury.
Smackdown got a 2.2.
Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 2012
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
It's the final show before Elimination Chamber which is the final major show before Wrestlemania. That being said, the Chamber is pretty much set and it appears that one way or another, Punk and Jericho will be feuding after the PPV. It should be interesting to see what the final push is here and if they add any other matches to the card beforehand. Let's get to it.
We open with the ending of last week's show where Kane got in Eve's face. Kane says that tonight, Cena embraces the hate and someone takes a ride in the ambulance.
We open in the arena....with a debate. All six of the Raw guys in the Chamber are going to have a debate. Punk is asked how he thinks he'll overcome the odds when he's interrupted by Ace. Ace is back and that's about it. As for the question, Punk says this debate will NOT end in violence. As for old snickleprints, aka Clown Shoes, congratulations for maintaining power. Punk thinks Ace must have something like beastiality pictures of the Board members to keep his job. He'll win because he's the best in the world.
Vickie asks for no booing and Dolph says he's better than everyone. Truth says if he's elected, he'll trade Vickie and Dolph for Hornswoggle and a box of spiders. Ziggler: HOW DO YOU WORK HERE??? Truth will also make it legally required to say WHAT after every line of the Pledge of Allegiance. Now back to the issue at hand, he's going to stomp that box of spiders and make them into Spider Stew, which is high in protein and low in carbs. With Little Jimmy by his side, he'll drink the stew which will make him strong enough to win the Chamber.
Miz gets to follow that. He says he was the main event of Wrestlemania last year. As for his opponents, Kofi is an afterthought, Truth is insane and should be replaced by Little Jimmy. Punk will melt faster than his ice cream bars. Ziggler has only scored with an old woman....and the buzzer rings before Miz can get to Jericho. He keeps talking and the buzzer keeps going.
Kofi says everything can change in one night and he's tired of being an afterthought. We actually get a Kofi chant. Jericho says he's surrounded by neophytes and that he's the best in the world. He's been in more Chambers and eliminated more people than anyone ever has. He won the last time he was in it too. Punk should just give him the title right now. Punk says he was thinking of the time when Jericho finished 7th on Dancing With The Stars.
Dolph goes off and says this is stupid. Truth says he won't be talked down to by a man named after Flipper, and we get some dolphin sounds. Jerry says we're getting all six of them in singles matches tonight, so let's start with Jericho vs. Kofi. Jericho shoves his podium over and walks up to Punk. Punk holds up the title and Kofi kicks Jericho's head off.
Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston
This starts after a break. Jericho is still shaken up so Kofi clotheslines him to the outside and hits a suicide dive. Jericho goes face first into the table and they head back in. Chris gets in some right hands and a senton backsplash for two. Off to a modified chinlock but Kofi comes back with a cross body. Jerry makes fun of Jericho's statements that he came up with all those ideas. Kofi tries a springboard dropkick but lands in the Walls. He makes the ropes after a good while but pops up with Trouble in Paradise which gets a very delayed two. Jericho gets up and the Codebreaker ends this clean at 5:21.
We get a clip from the Rumble with Ryder getting Tombstoned.
Cena is with Ryder in the back and Ryder is in a neckbrace and wheelchair. Ryder has flowers for Eve though because he can't stay away from her. Cena offers to bring her here and keep watch.
Otunga says Ace isn't the permanent GM but he has an idea to make him GM of both shows.
We recap Big show vs. Orton on Smackdown and get some post show bonus footage where Show chokeslammed Orton.
Here's Bryan for commentary I believe.
Big Show vs. Randy Orton
This also starts after a break. Show throws Orton around as the size is just too much for Randy. Orton is all shaken as we take a break. Back with Randy holding a sleeper. He jumps on Show's back and Show goes down to one knee. Show breaks it up but walks into a great dropkick. Orton covers but is launched to the floor on the kickout. Show glares at Bryan who Cole has been complimenting all match.
Another dropkick drapes Show on the top rope and it's a SUPER elevated DDT. Cole calls it extra vintage. How can it be vintage when it's never happened before? Orton loads up the RKO and they horribly botch it with Orton never even leaving his feet. Show tries a chokeslam but Randy escapes and hits a good RKO as Bryan runs in for the DQ at 7:21.
Bryan lays them both out with the belt post match.
Here's Shawn for his big promo with HHH. Shawn talks about how people on Twitter ask him why he always shows up at this time of year. BECAUSE IT'S WRESTLEMANIA!!! He says he can't be the Main Event anymore, but he can be Mr. Hall of Fame now.
Last week he was watching Raw (and yes he gets TV in the middle of nowhere place that he lives) and was waiting for HHH to say yes to Undertaker. Shawn heard him say no and then called Ace, saying he needed to talk to HHH. Then he thought HHH was just messing with the people and Undertaker. Shawn calls out HHH and even plays air guitar during the entrance.
Here's the Game and they hug. They throw up an X as required by law. HHH says it's great to see Shawn who has managed to stop hunting wabbits with Elmer Fudd. However, HHH isn't going to face Taker at the PPV. Shawn saw Undertaker leave last year and HHH know he'd have to end Taker to beat him, and that's not the guy he is anymore. Shawn says he's stuck by HHH forever, even when he married that girl. Did that make HHH one of them, as in a corporate sellout?
The Game doesn't like that. He says it's called investing in the future. HHH says Shawn can't understand it so they're not having this argument here. Shawn says he's a simple guy and it's hard for him to understand this corporate stuff. However, he knows a coward when he sees one. No matter how much money you put around it, a coward is still a coward. The fans chant one more match and HHH leaves. Shawn says yeah walk away like a coward.
HHH freaks and comes back, saying Shawn can't understand what's going on. Shawn sits on his ranch with his wife and kids but HHH has real life responsibilities. All of this is going to be his and it means its his responsibility. You can't look at Taker like an opponent because you can't. Undertaker is a brand who is good for business. Their breed is gone and there's a new one in town. Only Taker is left and HHH won't be the one to end that era.
HHH goes nuclear on Shawn, saying that Shawn can't push HHH to do what Shawn couldn't get done. Shawn says that's a great speech that would work on most people, but he's at peace with where he's at. HHH has no peace though. He needs to look Shawn in the eye and say he doesn't want to end the Streak. HHH starts to walk away but Shawn pulls him back and says look him in the ey. There goes the jacket and Shawn puts the mic down. HHH looks him in the eye and says no. Shawn looks like he's about to cry. He leaves and HHH stands alone in the ring.
He goes to leave.....and a gong sounds. We get another promo video from Taker saying this isn't over. Taker's hands are seen pulling out a nice and cutting his hair. He says keep your pity and give me what is mine: immortality. Back in the arena HHH pulls his tie off and we go to a break. WOW that was good.
R-Truth vs. Dolph Ziggler
Dolph takes over to start and hits a dropkick. He struts around and does his handstand in the chinlock. There's a slam and Ziggy does his situps. Truth however rolls him up for a pin at 2:35.
Santino comes to see Ryder and offers him a breath mint. This isn't funny.
Tamina Snuka vs. Brie Bella
The name change should help. Beth is on commentary for this and will defend the title on Sunday against Tamina. Brie takes over quickly but Tamina hits a jawbreaker to escape. Snuka hits Nikki and then a Samoan Drop to set up the Superfly Splash for the pin at 1:25. Just how I like my Divas matches: nice and short.
Video on The Rock. He's a movie star you know.
We go to Cena for a reaction on that video but we hear a woman screaming. It's Eve who is being thrown into the ambulance by Kane. Cena comes to her rescue but the door is locked. Kane gets back up and slams Cena into said door before getting into the driver's seat. Cena manages to get up and open the door and Eve dives to him. Kane drives off and Eve kisses him. Cena asks what that was for. We pan over to Ryder who is STUNNED and wants to know what that was.
After a break Ryder is wheeling away and is sorry to see that happens. She just wants to be friends. Ryder is disgusted and wheels away.
CM Punk vs. The Miz
Somehow it's 10:48 already. This show has flown by and in a good way. Poor Zack is the #1 trending topic in the world. Miz takes over to start and works on the left arm. Reality Check is countered and Punk kicks Miz's head off. Notice that Punk shakes the feeling back into his arm. That's called selling and it's a GOOD THING. Punk strikes away but the arm isn't working right.
Miz pounds on the arm some more so Punk uses his right arm and legs. The knee and a right arm bulldog look to set up the GTS. Miz escapes into the short DDT for two and there's the running clothesline in the corner. He comes off the top but Punk grabs a powerslam for two. The Macho Elbow (presumably) is broken up and Miz loads up a superplex. Punk comes back and hits the elbow for two. Miz pops up and tries the Finale but Punk reverses into the Anaconda Vice for the tap at 5:00.
The ambulance is back.
Post break here's Cena. He says there was an awkward moment back there and for what it's worth Zack, he's sorry. This was Kane's plan all along: to turn everyone against him and make him embrace the hate. It's a solid plan and it would have worked on anybody else. He's not anybody else though. For some reason people think there's an evil switch he can just turn on and off. The fans chant that they don't hate him.
Cena says it's been like six years and he's comfortable in his own skin. Cena says he rises above hate and maybe they were chanting we all hate you. The people can think he's a lady part having Fruity Pebbles guy, which draws a Fruity Pebbles chant. He says he'll keep adapting and winning. This Sunday, Kane leaves in an ambulance. As for Dwayne (Rocky chant), Cena has a message for him for Wrestlemania.
Hold that though as here's Ryder in the wheelchair. He gets up on his crutches and very slowly walks down to the ring. Cena tries to explain but Ryder knocks the mic out of his hands. Cena tries to explain again but Ryder slaps him. John takes the shirt off and the fans chant broken back. Ryder says Cena was never his friend and goes to hit Cena again.
Cena blocks it and pulls his own fist back but Ryder falls to the floor. Ryder says stay away from him and leaves. Cena didn't hit him. Kane pops up on screen and says that Cena has embraced the hate. Sunday will be his last match until Mania because Cena will have his body leaving the WWE in an ambulance. Kane asks for a round of applause for Cena.
Kane then pops up behind Ryder and SHOVES HIM OFF THE STAGE IN HIS WHEELCHAIR! Cena panics and says get help which is there almost immediately. Eve comes out showing off some nice crack and is all worried. The fans chant for Cena for some reason. Ryder is taken out to end the show.
Results
Chris Jericho b. Kofi Kingston Codebreaker
Randy Orton b. Big Show via DQ when Daniel Bryan interfered
R-Truth b. Dolph Ziggler Small Package
Tamina Snuka b. Brie Bella Superfly Splash
CM Punk b. The Miz Anaconda Vice
Tuesday
Raw got a 3.0, down again.
Orton was hurt by Bryan's belt shot and is out of the Chamber. No word on a replacement yet.
Wednesday
Sorensen is out of the hospital and is expected to make a full recovery. No word on when he'll be back but it's going to be a long time.
NXT
Date: February 15, 2012
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Commentators: Josh Matthews, William Regal
Fifty shows. We've somehow hit FIFTY shows. There have been 104 shows in the history of NXT and nearly half of them have been in this season. Anyway, nothing of note has been happening lately as the rookies (can you be classified as a rookie in your second year on the show?) have been losing more lately other than Titus. Oh and Hawkins/Reks beat up Striker last week. Let's get to it.
Here are Hawkins and Reks to open the show. Hawkins says it should have been their moment but instead it wasn't. Reks says they should be on the main shows instead of begging for matches here. Hawkins runs down Striker and wants to know what a host does around here. The NXT roster is full of talented superstars so it needs change. He pulls back his vest and reveals an Obama style shirt.
Here's Striker who says this is all ridiculous. He's given everyone a chance to shine. Hawkins says come here and say that but Striker says he isn't as stupid as Hawkins looks. Striker has called an old friend to help him. Call him a substitute if you will. And it's Regal. Regal is now in charge of things, at least for tonight. Hawkins has a match right now and Reks is banned from ringside. Reks: Why me? Regal: I don't like you you scruffy thing. Go and have a bath or something.
Curt Hawkins vs. Tyson Kidd
Awesome sequence to start as Hawkins throws him over the top but Kidd skins the cat. Hawkins slides under him and Kidd teases a dive. He lands on the apron and runs to the post, jumps around it and catches Hawkins in a hurricanrana. That looked great. Kidd is looking more muscular now. Hawkins rams him into the apron and we take a break.
Back with Hawkins getting two off a suplex. Hawkins is wrestling in the shirt which is a better look for him. Hawkins works on a chinlock which is broken pretty quickly. Kidd fires off some kicks and sends Hawkins to the outside. Tyson hits a slingshot dropkick and a running knee smash off the apron which gets two back inside. Hawkins counters what looked like a suplex into an inverted DDT for two.
Kidd goes to the apron and tries a sunset flip but spins in mid-air to land in a reverse victory roll for two. He tries a Rocker Dropper but Hawkins suplexes out of it which also gets two. We go to the corner and Kidd fights out of a superplex attempt. In a great and subtle move, Kidd uses a victory roll (ala Bret, who Regal said Kidd had been training with) into the Sharpshooter for the submission at 7:37.
Titus O'Neil vs. Yoshi Tatsu
The way the announcers are talking, Regal is permanent boss. The power controls to start this power vs. speed match. Titus yells at Yoshi that no one cares about Yoshi because it's all about Titus. Yoshi takes more punishment but avoids a charge in the corner and fires off some kicks. A running knee to the chest gets two. Not that it matters as Titus hits him in the back and a very good Clash of the Titus gets the pin at 3:22.
Titus yells at Regal that he wants competition in the form of Alex Riley. Here's Riley who says he'll come say it to Titus' face. Alex says let's do it right now and Titus rolls to the floor to escape.
Alicia and Kaitlyn want Bateman and Maxine to break up. Kaitlyn insists they're just friends. Curtis comes up to hit on them. A guy with flowers and candy comes up after the girls leave saying he's looking for Bateman. Curtis says that's him and there's a card for Maxine. He says it's like stealing candy from a Bateman.
Percy Watson vs. Michael McGillicutty
McGillicutty has a big beard now. Michael takes him to the mat to start but Percy nips up. I don't think the crowd knows who Michael is. Whoever he is he hooks a quick chinlock and Percy is in trouble. Percy comes back with a modified version of the spinning DDT Rock did when he was Rocky Maivia. A dropkick and clothesline put Michael down but the Heisman lands on knees. Not that it matters as Persecution ends this at 4:02.
Maxine finds a box of chocolates addressed to Kaitlyn and signed by Derrick. She isn't happy.
Raw ReBound is about Cena/Kane/Ryder.
Kaitlyn is on commentary for this.
Derrick Bateman/Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater/Johnny Curtis
Kaitlyn says that she and Bateman watch Full House together. Justin and Curtis start off and Curtis is kicked to the outside. Bateman dives on Curtis and we take a break. Back with Slater working on Justin's knees. Apparently Curtis has been asking Regal if he was breastfed. Ok then. Curtis works over the knees as Regal hits on Kaitlyn. Justin gets two off a quick rollup. There's the hot tag to Bateman and he cleans house. Everything breaks down and the falling bulldog (the Sweet Meat Sizzler according to Kaitlyn) gets the pin on Slater at 5:37.
Post match Maxine comes out and hits Kaitlyn with the chocolates. She rams Kaitlyn into the barricade and Bateman tries to stop her so she shoves him too. Bateman carries Maxine out as Curtis smiles.
Results
Tyson Kidd b. Curt Hawkins Sharpshooter
Titus O'Neil b. Yoshi Tatsu Clash of the Titus
Percy Watson b. Michael McGillicutty Persecution
Derrick Bateman/Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater/Johnny Curtis Sweet Meat Sizzler to Slater
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay
We're back in Orlando which means the crowds have gotten a lot worse again. Roode is still the champion after Sting had to count the pin on Sunday in a redo of Summerslam 1997. And before anyone complains, no I'm not saying that's a bad thing. 14 years is more than enough for an angle to be repeated. Anyway, we start towards Victory Road tonight. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap video of the two main events from the PPV. The other is Garrett vs. Gunner if you're confused.
Here's Roode to open the show. He says that the fans are chanting Rooooooooooode so loudly that he needs to hear his introduction again. Roode talks about overcoming everyone, including Jeff Hardy. As for Sting, Sting has been pointing his finger at Roode since Roode won the title. After Sunday, that finger should be pointed at Sting because it was him that counted the pin to keep the belt on Bobby.
Cue Sting who says it was Sting that was selfish on Sunday because he let his anger get the better of him. If hurt the outcome of the match and Jeff got screwed. He's here tonight to make things right with Hardy. He's glad Roode is a fighting champion because tonight, it's Roode vs. Hardy. There's no time limit and no DQ. Oh and it starts NEXT.
Brandon Jacobs of the New York Giants is here.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode
Jeff charges and attacks Roode before the introductions can be made. Roode catches him in Percy Watson's Persecution for two. Roode is sent to the floor where Jeff hits a dive and a pair of chair shots. This isn't falls count anywhere. Roode is rammed into various metal objects and has his suplex countered into one by Hardy. It's been about 95% Jeff so far. They go towards the ramp and Hardy cracks him in the back with a chair. Hardy whips him into the apron twice and signals to the fans for something. Roode uses the distraction to get in a punch to the ribs.
Jeff counters a whip to send Roode's knees into the steps. He uses said steps to make a platform and hits Poetry in Motion onto the champ against the railing. With both guys down we take a break. Back with Hardy getting two off his front suplex. He loads up the Whisper in the Wind but Roode shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch him. Roode takes it to the floor again and tries a piledriver on the ramp but Jeff counters with a backdrop.
They go up to the stage with Hardy in control again. Hardy throws Roode off the stage but it wasn't a huge crash as Roode is up pretty quickly. Also the stage isn't as high. Jeff dives off the ramp with a clothesline. Twist of Fate is countered as Roode shoves Jeff into the stage. Roode's charge misses and both guys are down.
This is random but they're near the announce desk so it popped into my head. Tazz isn't live in the arena and is doing this on a voiceover due to the death in his family. Hardy takes him back to the ring and takes his shirt off. Out of nowhere comes Kurt Angle who whips him into the steps. Roode pops up and hits the spear (of course) for the pin at 16:45.
Roode says he won when Sting comes in. Sting says he cheated the system and says he's not done yet. Roode is going to defend against the winner of the #1 contenders match tonight.
Eric Young has a guitar and says that he'll get ODB back tonight. He also talks about shoot fighting and having his driver's license taken away.
Sting talks to two people about getting a shot at Roode. He asks if they're in and the people are revealed as Ray and Storm. They both say they should be world champion and the match is on.
We get a video of the Sorensen injury from Sunday. The current word is that Sorensen will be out for a year at least. He is however moving his arms and I believe legs as well.
Zema Ion/Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore
Aries and Moore start things off. Aries takes him down with a fast headlock takedown and then a dropkick. Ion tags himself in to tick the champ off. Shannon kicks everyone down and Aries is knocked to the floor. There's a baseball slide and Asai Moonsault which kind of misses as Moore lands on his feet and Aries falls a few seconds later.
Shannon picks up Ion's hairspray which gets him a dropkick to the back. Shelley knocks Ion to the floor and wants a tag. Here's Alex who misses a double boot and has Sliced Bread broken up. Aries dropkicks him in the back of the head and loads up the brainbuster but Ion tags himself in. Shelley escapes the brainbuster but falls into a rollup by Ion at 4:10.
Speaking of heel vs. heel, Gail and Madison are coming to the ring and Madison wants to chill things out between then.
Battle Royal
Brooke Tessmacher, Tara, Sarita, Rosita, Winter, Angelina Love, ODB, Mickie James, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne
Winner gets the shot at Gail at Victory Road. Before the match, Madison praises Gail for giving everyone a chance to win right now. Madison sits at ringside with Gail. Winter and Tessmacther are out quickly. ODB threw both of them out and she tosses Rosita onto them. Mickie goes after her and has some better luck. She tries a headscissors but three other girls knock them both to the apron.
Mickie goes up top and ODB knocks her out. Everyone rams into ODB to knocker her to the floor and we're down to Tara, Velvet, Angelina, Sarita and Madison who is on the floor. Tara is knocked out by Sarita. Angelina and Sarita team up against Velvet who fights out as well as she can. Velvet fights both of them as well as she can but can't put Sarita out.
The alliance seems to break down but they hit a double elbow to put Velvet down. Madison hasn't been in the ring yet so she's still in this. Botox Injection puts Velvet down and Sarita says now put her out. Angelina goes to do that and Sarita tosses her. Salsa dancing abounds. Sarita charges at her but Velvet ducks to put her out. Madison runs in to throw out Velvet for the win at 6:30.
Storm is all fired up.
The new tag champs say they proved their greatness by doing what they said they'd do. It's a rematch next week.
We recap the Garrett vs. Gunner match from the PPV where Garrett fought hard but lost.
Here's Immortal, who is now Flair, Gunner, Bischoff, and Chelsea if you remember her. She's hot if nothing else. Eric says Chelsea wanted back in after seeing Garrett's loss on Sunday. Champagne is brought in along with cigars. Eric says get a dog as a dog catcher, but never come close to wrestling again. He wishes Garrett the best in all of his future endeavors.
The host of some MMA show talks about MMA.
Eric Young talks to ODB who doesn't want to hear it. He plays a song on his guitar called the Ode To ODB. She laughs at it and spanks him. This isn't funny, as usual.
James Storm vs. Bully Ray
It's 10:30 so there's either something after this or we're going to have a long match. Ray is way too proud of his calves. Feeling out process to start and Storm armdrags him down. Hebnar trips over him and Ray works on Storm's knee. Ray even takes the boot off of Storm's foot to work it over even better. More leg work follows which has been the focus of the match so far. Ray keeps on the leg as we take a break.
Back with Storm trying a comeback but Ray dropkicks the knee out for two. Ray punches the knee and talks trash, which gets him a punch in the face. Codebreaker puts Ray in the corner. He comes out with a big boot but Storm ducks underneath and hits the Last Call for the pin and the #1 contendership at 12:10.
Storm has a beer bash post match and gives Brandon Jacobs a beer as well. Ray jumps Storm during the celebration and gets in Jacobs' face. He takes a drink from the beer and spits it in Jacobs' face. Jacobs shoves him down and wants to fight. Storm and security pull him back and D'Lo Brown looks like he's trying to hold back a small bus. Jacobs and Storm get in the ring and celebrate.
Storm and Jacobs say bring it Bully. Jacobs will be back next week.
Sting wants to talk to Roode face to face. Roode comes out and announces Roode vs. Storm in the cage at Lockdown. Roode kicks Sting in the balls for that. He takes Sting's sunglasses and hits him with the belt to open him up. So....Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road?
Results
Bobby Roode b. Jeff Hardy Spear
Zema Ion/Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore Rollup to Shelley
Madison Rayne won a battle royal last eliminating Velvet Sky
James Storm b. Bully Ray Last Call