klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Friday
Impact got a 1.22, down just a bit from last week.
Smackdown
Date: November 11, 2011
Location: Liverpool Echo Arena, Liverpool, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T
Another week, another Smackdown. With Randy having beaten Cody officially to end their feud (at least in theory) it should be interesting to see where they go with it. Also it seems like Bryan and the case have been activated into a possibility of him cashing in so we have that wild card in the title hunt now. Other than that it'll be more build for the PPV I'd assume. Let's get to it.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is Winter. The season, not the hot British chick.
We hear about Team Orton (Orton, Sheamus, Kofi, Cara, Ryan) vs. Team Barrett (Barrett, Rhodes, Swagger, Hunico, Christian even though the Canadian is now injured so that might be needing a replacement). To people that say all of the WWE guys are the same, this match has three Americans, an Irishman, a Ghanian, two Mexicans, a Welsh guy, an Englishman and a Canadian. That's a pretty eclectic mix wouldn't you say?
Here's Randy to open the show. Orton has a great tattoo job on his arms. His shirt is roughly the same color as his skin and I couldn't tell where it ended and where the tattoos began when he did his pose. He talks about how he doesn't play well with others as every team he's been on has imploded, usually due to him hurting them. Orton has no problem being the captain so he can beat up Rhodes and Christian again. He talks about not knowing Swagger or Hunico all that well but having no problem taking care of them as well. This draws out Barrett.
Barrett says the problems he's given Orton before will be nothing compared to the ones he'll have at Survivor Series. They've both been in groups and he's always risen to the top of them. Orton is a natural born predator that no one will ever trust. Barrett wants the world title and he has to get Randy out of the way to do that. Orton is staring off into space during this. Barrett: Are you even listening to me. Orton: Actually no I'm not. Well that's just rude. An RKO is threatened so here's Christian in a neck brace.
Christian calls Randy the Yoko Ono of his team in Beatles reference #1 of the night (great drinking game). Christian takes credit for Barrett beating Sheamus last week, saying that he inspires people to be better. He was offered the captain spot but he declined it due to his injuries. Barrett has Christian's full endorsement though. Here comes the beatdown as well as Sheamus for the save. Teddy comes out and I must have a bad ear infection or something because he doesn't make a tag match for the main event. Instead it's Christian vs. Sheamus and Barrett vs. Orton. Nice little change of pace.
Christian vs. Sheamus
Sheamus runs him over to start and takes over quickly. Christian begs off and gets the forearms to the chest for his trouble. There's a gorilla press and Christian bails to the floor. Christian gets back in first and walks into the slingshot shoulder. Christian finally sends him into the post to take over and adds a missile dropkick for two. Out to the floor and Cole gets on my nerves already. Christian tries a dive over the top but Sheamus catches him with ease.
After a break Christian has a chinlock on and is in control. They slug it out and I think you know who wins there. Christian goes up and jumps into a punch to the ribs, which is the same counter I saw on an old tape I was watching a few moments ago. The Canadian tries the sunset flip out of the corner but jumps into the Irish Curse for two. Christian dives into his second fallaway slam of the match but pops up for a dropkick to put Sheamus down again.
Sheamus charges into the corner and gets caught by the Pendulum Kick. A tornado DDT gets two for Christian. Sheamus does the always cool pull yourself up from the corner to the top rope spot and hits the top rope shoulder for two. Brogue Kick and Unprettier both miss but the High Cross is enough to finish this at 10:15 shown of 13:45.
We recap Bryan almost cashing in last week but walking into the Slam instead.
Bryan talks to AJ and Kaitlyn and says he didn't know he was almost going to cash in. He has a non-title match tonight. AJ and Kaitlyn imply sexual interest if he's champ. Henry pops up and says it's not that easy to be champ. Bryan gets in his face, saying he's cashing in at Mania and he'll win. Henry says Bryan has guts, and they'll be all over the ring later.
Video on Ezekiel Jackson of all people. He's strong and that's about it. This comes off almost like a heel video.
Teddy Long is with Charles Robinson and says be on your game tonight in the Usos match. This is rather pointless. Here's Aksana who hits on Teddy again and innuendo is made. Teddy wants Aksana to be in Alicia's corner later tonight so she can get experience. Aksana thinks she's Rihanna. More innuendo is made. Next.
Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal
Mahal is called mysterious. How is he mysterious? They flat out explained his backstory like two weeks after he started wrestling. Mahal takes over to start and Cole makes fun of DiBiase hanging out with fans. It's implied that DiBiase has given up his dad's money. Dream Street ends this at 1:06.
Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry
Big Show is banned from ringside. Bryan has Ride of the Valkyries again but it's a rock version. It's an improvement over the old song. Booker says Bryan has never had a girlfriend in his life. Oh give me a break. Are we really afraid of the drawing power of Gail Kim now? Henry takes him to the floor and rams him into the barricade then pushes Bryan's head against the steps.
Back in the ring and the fans try to get behind Bryan. Henry misses a charge and Bryan hits a missile dropkick and Henry is staggered. The kicks put Henry down and Bryan actually gets the LeBell Lock on....kind of. Henry does the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter and pounds Daniel down in the corner. Henry splashes him but pulls up at two. Bryan says bring it on so Henry hits the Slam for the pin at 3:45.
Henry goes for a chair to break the leg but Bryan gets it away and hits Henry with it. Three World's Strongest Slams later, Bryan regrets that chair shot. Henry sets to Pillmanize the leg but the sound of music stops him. Why? I don't know. I guess he can't jump while music is playing. Henry gets the chair and Show knocks it out of his hand. They stare each other down and Henry bails.
Show says watch his match and he'll show Henry something impressive.
Big Show vs. ???/???/???
They're three unnamed jobbers. They get Show down for a second but one of them kicks him which wakes him up. Two take a double chokeslam and the third tries to leave. Show chases him down and the big punch ends this at 1:20.
Henry says that was nothing and that he's impressed Big Show, which he'll do again at Survivor Series.
Video on Mania tickets.
Tamina vs. Alicia Fox
Nattie is on commentary and Aksana is with Alicia. Rosa is with Tamina. Tamina is pounded down in the corner but remembers she's Samoan and no sells it. After about a minute of beating her down, Tamina gets caught with an elbow. Nattie says she and Beth are now called Pin-Up Strong. What is that, their third name? Alicia hits a front flip legdrop for the pin at 2:00. Is there a point to any of these matches with the girls anymore?
Sheamus is asked if he's a hot head after seeing clips of his brawl with Barrett last week. He denies it and says he's about having a good time, be it presenting an award to Justin Bieber at the MTV Europe Awards of hanging out with his cousin Beaker (POP). He pretends to be mad at Striker then smiles.
Hunico/Epico vs. Usos
Primo comes out with the Hispanic team. Booker says they're like gremlins. Ok so Hunico is in the white shirt. Remember when the Usos debuted and their deal was that there were civilized Samoans out there that weren't all crazy? Now they do that Siva Tao thing. I love rewritting kayfabe. Epico starts off with we'll say Jey. Epico is Primo's cousin which is true in real life and on TV it seems.
The heels take over on Jimmy and take turns beating him down. Why are Mexican/Hispanic themed teams always heels? I think LAX were faces for awhile and that's about it. Lukewarm tag brings in Jey who beats on Hunico but Epico makes the save. Primo tries to cheat so Jey kicks Epico down. Hunico hits a Swanton on Jey for the pin at 2:45.
There's a gang beatdown post match as the fans cheer for Sin Cara. He's not booked on the tour though so the heels beat Jimmy down with ease. Time for the international war period?
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett
Not much to start but that's to be expected. Barrett takes over with a headlock but walks into a dropkick for two. Now it's Orton with the headlock as Cole talks about the bareknuckle thing again. Orton kind of plays heel here, shouting that Barrett is the hometown boy before covering him. Barrett gets a boot up in the corner to put Orton down. That and an elbow drop get two.
Out to the floor for some brawling and in a cool sequence, Orton tries to send him into the steps but Barrett jumps on top of them then kicks the steps into Orton. Wade sends him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Orton in a chinlock and Barrett's hair is a mess. Pumphandle slam gets two. A big boot puts Orton on the floor and it's back to the chinlock.
Boss Man Slam gets two. Barrett sets for a middle rope elbow but only one person per company can use the same move so Orton breaks it up and hits a superplex for a delayed two. They slug it out and Orton starts his ending sequence with the powerslam and DDT. RKO is loaded up but Barrett shoves him off. He pokes Orton in the eye and rolls him up for the pin at 9:50 shown of 13:20.
Results
Sheamus b. Christian High Cross
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal Dream Street
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan World's Strongest Slam
Big Show b. ???/???/??? - WMD
Alicia Fox b. Tamina Flip Legdrop
Hunico/Epico b. Usos Swanton to Jey
Wade Barrett b. Randy Orton Rollup
Saturday
Ring of Honor
Date: November 12, 2011
Location: Davis Arena, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuiness
It's the final final week of the tapings from the first batch of Louisville shows. They've taped five more weeks so they have a lot more material ready. The main event tonight is the House of Truth vs. the American Wolves so we have some stories going on here. There isn't much else to say here so let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's tag team stuff where it's really hard to tell if the Briscos are faces or heels. I know they're supposed to be heels but it's really not clear.
Bravado Brothers vs. Young Bucks
The Bravado Brothers are controversial don't you know. If you don't know, Kelly will tell you. Their names are Lancelot and Harlem. Ok then. The Bucks are Generation Me and we get a reference to them being disrespected by Booker T at the WWF taping. The Bravados look a bit flamboyant which you should get the meaning of in wrestling speak. Harlem vs. Nick to start us off with Harlem hammering away.
The Bucks take over with their arm work but the problem comes down to the same thing I believe Lance Storm says: they look like they'd be better suited to date a 15 year old than to beat up grown men. The Bucks clear the ring and at least have better looking attire than what they had in TNA. Lancelot takes over with an axe kick and a blue thunder bomb for two on Matt.
There's a bicycle kick as I'm pretty much just guessing which of these guys is which. Harlem (thank you Kevin) hits a big flip die to take out both of the Bucks, getting two on Jeremy (I can't remember their ROH names or their TNA names. Does it really matter?). A double team move gets two on let's say Nick. The Bravados are Native Americans so we hear about great Native American wrestlers like Jack Brisco and Wahoo McDaniel and Tatanka. Kelly: Don't laugh!
Nick does his speed dives and the Bucks take over. They hit More Bang For Your Buck (rolling fireman's carry slam followed by a 450 followed by a moonsault) for the pin on Harlem at 6:10. The finishing sequence is cool but I still have no idea what their names are, which probably isn't a good thing.
The tag champs say they'll beat the Briscos. Here's the All Night Express who says they've been forgotten about. I think that's because the Briscos beat them in back to back matches. Kenny calls the WGTT a couple of ducks. Never let him near a mic again. Please. Titus says nothing of note. What in the world was the point of this segment?
Time for Inside ROH to waste more time. This time it's about Kevin Steen, whom we've needed an explanation about for awhile now. We see him turning on his partner El Generico and how Steve Corino was the one pulling his strings. They feuded a bunch of times and had a career vs. mask match where Generico beat him.
Since a contract means nothing in wrestling, Steen wants to come back now. Corino realized the error of his ways and tried to mentor people. Steen came to a show (Best in the World, which I think we've seen in its entirety given how much they've shown from it) to apologize. And of course he beat up everyone in the ring at the time, namely Corino. Steen tried to beat up the owner at some show but is now threatening to sue Cornette. The whole contract thing really does mean nothing in wrestling does it?
More talking as Lethal says Mike Bennett needs to stop saying he beat Lethal.
Steve Corino says there's a monster in the form of Kevin Steen and Corino just needs five minutes of Cornette's time.
Video on Roderick Strong vs. Kyle O'Reilly from a few weeks ago as this feud takes forever to get anywhere.
Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong vs. American Wolves
Here's ANOTHER break before the match. It's a brawl to start as we have a ton of time on this show. That's just what I want: a long Davey Richards match. Richards is sent to the floor and I think we're starting with elgin vs. Edwards. Richards goes up and hits a missile dropkick for two. Off to the champ and it's time for strikes! Off to Elgin as McGuiness admits that Richards isn't much of a draw.
Edwards gets beaten down for awhile but it's off to Richards who kicks more. Would a headlock be too much to ask for? A Tajiri Elbow is countered into Abyss' Shock Treatment backbreaker for two. Off to Elgin and Richards shrugs off a bunch of chops and punches. Strong hits a dropkick to take over and it's back to Elgin. Richards sends both guys to the floor and it's a blind tag to Edwards. Here are stereo dives to take the heels out as we run down house shows.
Back in and Eddie hits a bad enziguri to Strong for two. An over the shoulder Stunner hits and it's off to a half crab which Edwards calls an Achilles hold for some reason. They fight to the apron and Strong drops him down onto the apron with a belly to back suplex. After a break Elgin is suplexing Edwards. Powerslam gets two. Edwards gets a double knee smash to both guys and it's off to Richards.
RICHARDS USES SOMETHING OTHER THAN A STRIKE!!! I need my medicine! Kelly puts over ROH as the real wrestling company as Richards rolls through to an ankle lock because that's his finishing move even if it makes no sense from a psychology perspective. A German gets two on Elgin. The Wolves go up but both miss and a sidewalk slam gets two for Elgin.
Edwards is down from being shoved off the top and the idiot fans say this is awesome. Elgin picks up both Wolves at once and slams them down to put all four guys down. They slug it out (of course) and the ROH fans all drool over how stupid these strikes are. The Wolves hit a pair of double stomps off the top for two on Elgin. An ankle lock doesn't beat Elgin again and we miss whatever big move Elgin hits as the camera was on Edwards and Strong. Martini tries to cheat as Elgin has Richards pinned. The same thing happens while Edwards chokes Elgin out. Richards gets the pin at 18:08.
Results
Young Bucks b. Bravado Brothers More Bang For Your Buck to Harlem
American Wolves b. Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong Richards pinned Elgin after a dragon sleeper
Turning Point 2011
Date: November 13, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
It's time for Turning Point and to be honest, I had to look up the card to remember anything more than about two matches. The title match is slapped on because they've burned through their big PPV main event level matches for the sake of a TV rating that came and went. Other than that we have a lot of matches that don't mean a lot and two that were added since Impact to flesh out the card a little bit. Let's get to it.
The opening video is a bit different, probably because they have no idea what the point of this show is. It's about....Richard Nixon and Bobby Roode? Whatever.
TV Title: Robbie E vs. Eric Young
Apparently losing to a reality TV star after losing your previous title shot means you get another one on PPV. There's the locking up with the referee and the victory lap from Young before anything happens. They speed things up to start and Young sends him to the floor. They do some basic fast paced stuff and nothing is really worth writing down. Robbie hooks a chinlock and then a second one a few moments later.Nice way to fire up a crowd to open a PPV guys.
Orlando is fired up for this. I guess they were jealous from not having their show for a few weeks. Young gets up and hits a Stunner to escape and both guys are a bit dazed. Eric starts Hulking Up and takes his pants off, revealing GTW trunks. What is the appeal of this guy? I'd assume it's that he's not interesting or talented enough to be anything but comedy relief but I'll be nice and assume otherwise.
Eric fights back with a forearm, dropkick and belly to belly for two. There's a top rope elbow and he's no Shawn Michaels. The other Rob saves the other Robbie and Eric strips again. Get this over with already. Eric dives to the floor to take them both out but Rob gets in an extra shot, allowing Robbie E to get the pin and the title at about 7:00.
Video on Mexican America vs. Ink Inc.
AJ and Roode are here.
Tag Titles: Mexican America vs. Ink Inc.
Ok so it's a six person tag with Sarita and Toxxine or whatever her name is in as well. This was about a beating that injured Neal from like 6 months ago which is being mentioned now because we've had too much to talk about since then. Anarquia vs. Moore gets us going but it's off to Neal quickly. Jesse and Hernandez get in each others' faces and yell at each other a lot as the fans chant USA. I'm assuming it's for Ink Inc, but the Mexicans are Americans so who knows?
The big showdown goes nowhere and it's back to Moore who gets caught by the power game for a bit. Ink Inc speeds things up and it's off to Anarquia. Boring stuff so far and we have a Pork sign in the front row. Tazz praises Sarita for jumping up and down on the apron like he's a 12 year old trying to sound mature. Off to Neal who gets caught by a slingshot shoulder by Hernandez.
Mexican America takes over on Neal as I'm trying to imagine Ricky Morton with that kind of hair. It really isn't working. Off to a chinlock by Anarquia for a bit of rest. Some SuperMex power double teaming doesn't work as Anarquia misses his assisted dive. Neal tags in the chick and it's Toxxine vs. Sarita. The tattoed chick dominates until Hernandez makes the save and things break down.
We get to the comedy of the match as Toxxine and Neal pulls Anarquia's pants down to show the involuntary tattoo back there. And then Sarita hits Toxxine in the back with the belt for the pin at 8:34. You know, because they haven't made the titles even more worthless already. Didn't they have something to do with Hulk for like fifteen minutes?
Aries and Kash are in league to take care of Sorensen tonight. My mind wanders as Kash talks but I think he mentioned cutting Sorensen with his knife. Aries has a cape and stays behind to get more face time. His words, not mine.
X-Division Title: Jesse Sorensen vs. Austin Aries vs. Kid Kash
Aries leaves Kash to fight Sorensen on his own to start. Sorensen gets beaten down quickly as things start fast. They're playing up the whole 2-1 idea here as Sorensen gets rid of one but has the other waiting on him. Sorensen is like screw it and hits a huge dive to take them both out, getting two on Aries. Kash gets Sorensen down and tries to steal the title but Aries makes the save.
Kash hits a low blow now but Aries reminds him of the plan. Sorensen sends Kash to the floor via a nice dropkick (every rookie knows how to do that move very well anymore) but his cross body only gets two on Aries as Kash is back in. We get a slick double team move as Kash hooks a surfboard and Aries kicks away. They take turns chopping Sorensen and this is looking bleak.
Sorensen grabs a backdrop to send Kash to the floor out of nowhere but he's still outnumbered. I mean, he is fighting A Double after all. Kash pulls him to the floor so Aries can hit the awesome dive for two back in the ring as now it's Kash that doesn't want to lose. The heels argue a bit but beat on Sorensen a bit more. Aries goes up and does an Eddie Guerrero imitation (he passed away six years ago today) but lands on the knees. Wouldn't that hut really badly?
Kash was up top and misses his old fat man moonsault. Sorensen makes his comeback and gets two on Aries with a neckbreaker. Kash keeps making the save as I guess he needs the exercise at his age. Sorensen makes the heels hit each other with clotheslines and goes up. Kash gets up and hooks a superplex and then the Moneymaker (double underhook piledriver) to kill Sorensen dead but Aries steals the pin at about 13:00.
AJ says tonight is about revenge and he'll take the title tonight to get rid of Roode once and for all. Solid angry promo here.
Christopher Daniels vs. Rob Van Dam
This is no DQ. Why? No particular reason, but gimmicks make matches better right Russo? Daniels asks how we got to this stipulation so fast and says he's not a hardcore wrestler. Instead, let's make this a regular wrestling match. The fans boo what they had already come in expecting to see and RVD eventually shakes hands. Daniels pulls him in because every face has to be an idiot.
They go to the mat quickly and Daniels is sent running. Back in and there's the monkey flip to put Daniels in trouble. Why is it so rare to see Daniels in something not involving AJ? A kick puts Daniels down but he's an old X-Division guy so he doesn't sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Daniels but RVD escapes and hits a quick Rolling Thunder for no cover. A slingshot legdrop has Daniels in trouble but he takes over again quickly.
Daniels hooks a neck crank as this match is slowing down a lot. That's not exactly a bad thing but it's noticeable. Death Valley Driver gets two for Daniels. A running forearm in the corner puts Van Dam down. They slug it out and RVD puts him down with a clothesline. The springboard kick puts him down too and Daniels sends him to the floor because he was down 6 seconds.
A top rope kick puts Daniels on the floor and he tries to run. Van Dam rams him into the barricade and then hits a running legdrop to Daniels' back as he's draped over said barricade. The fans aren't as into this as you would expect. Back inside and Daniels throws the referee into RVD and drops him with an STO. There's a chair to Van Dam's ribs and a takedown onto the chair for two. Here comes the toolbox and then the screwdriver but Van Dam gets the chair for the Van Daminator. Tazz: Been there, felt that, it sucks. Five Star ends this at 11:13.
The Robs celebrate and Robbie says he's a TV star who will be around for a long time to come. They're going to the club.
We recap Crimson vs. Matt Morgan. It's a dream match according to them. I want whatever sleeping pill that person took because it must be powerful.
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson
It's a power struggle to start and neither guy can get anywhere with that. Test of strength doesn't go anywhere as Crimson lets go, which is kind of a heel move. Crimson takes over with a cravate and then some strikes which Tenay says he's really good at. I don't recall him being anything above average at them but that works. A clothesline puts Crimson on the floor as they're playing up the idea that they're evenly matched.
They fight on the floor and Morgan eventually takes over, possibly due to Crimson having a bad knee. Side slam gets two back in the ring for Morgan. Crimson fights back with a forearm/cross body. A release belly to belly overhead suplex gets two. Morgan fights back with a chokeslam for two. They're playing this up like a chess match where neither guy can hit anything to get an extended advantage.
Morgan uses more power stuff but can't get the pin on Crimson which is frustrating him. Crimson tries to reverse a whip but gets caught by a big boot from Morgan. Crimson grabs the Red Sky out of nowhere but Morgan rolls to the ropes, delaying the cover and making it only get two. Morgan says give me your best shot and they slug it out. They do something similar to Cactus Jack and Terry Funk trading weapon shots at the Rumble in I think 98. They get in a brawl and shove the referee down for the weak but required double DQ at 12:05.
There's a pull apart brawl after the match.
Scott Steiner and Bully Ray are ready for Abyss and Anderson. Ray talks trash and tells Scott to just keep flexing. Scott says he went to Parts Unknown and found Abyss' girlfriend to find out everything about Abyss. She was a cross between a redneck and a billy goat. After this, Ray has to date her and she's not only ugly but fat. Ray insinuates that Team 3D is the best team ever and Scott says he's the best tag team ever. Oh and don't bring her any food because she's fat. This was HILARIOUS.
Scott Steiner/Bully Ray vs. Abyss/Mr. Anderson
The entrances take forever and it's Anderson vs. Ray to start us off. I'm still trying to figure out why Abyss was a mystery partner last week. Ray runs his mouth a lot as Anderson takes him down with an armbar. Anderson's clotheslines don't work so he uses Amazing Red's double rotation kick instead. Ray suplexes out of a headlock and here's Steiner. Taz and Steiner had coffee earlier. Good to know I guess.
No Abyss yet as Anderson gets two off a clothesline. Anderson takes both of them down but gets crotched on the post. Taz calls it Yambag Yahtzee. Didn't he used to be the human suplex machine? The fans say they love Steiner so he tells them to shut up. They chant louder, thereby making him mad. How much can they love him then? Anderson hits a swinging neckbreaker to take Ray down but we get the old school heel move of coming in to make sure the referee misses the face tag. I love that.
Scott goes up and hits his Angle Slam from up there as we're still waiting on the very hot tag to Abyss. Steiner draws him in as Anderson gets a sunset flip for two. The fans haven't stopped chanting for about three minutes now. He even flips them off and they won't stop. Ray and Steiner yell at each other as Ray comes in. Anderson counters the Bubba Bomb into a DDT and both guys are down.
There are those chants again. I know he's popular but this is insane. We get the double tag and the fans are only a little excited to see Abyss. He beats everyone up and drops Steiner with a slam. Abyss goes up and hits a middle rope splash on the pancake formerly known as Scott Steiner. That gets two as does a chokeslam. The heels double team so Abyss runs them over with a double clothesline.
Anderson gets a blind tag and takes over on apparently the most popular guy in the entire company. Steiner grabs a downward spiral for two on Anderson, who gets booed for kicking out a little bit. Steiner even busts out the Frankensteiner for no cover on Anderson as Abyss got a blind tag of his own and the Black Hole Slam ends this at 11:47.
Post match Immortal beats down Abyss and puts him through a table but he pops up.
Gail/Madison/Karen are ready and this is about Karen looking good as the Knockouts Champion reflects on her as the Knockouts boss. Karen says she and Madison won't come out later.
Video on Velvet Sky who we're still supposed to believe was bullied because girls that look like that and were athletes in high school got treated awfully right?
Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky
Brawl to start and I really can't complain about seeing Velvet in shorts like those. Gail is knocked to the floor and Velvet totally misses a baseball slide but Gail sells it anyway. Back in a crossbody gets two for Sky. Kim takes over and here's Karen on the ramp as the fans chant what sounds like Sloppy Seconds. Gail hooks an abdominal stretch and Velvet fights back with nothing significant.
I'm sorry if I seem totally out of it here but I have zero interest in this show for the most part. Eat Defeat is blocked into a facebuster by Velvet but Karen distracts as Madison comes in to lay out Velvet. That only gets two and Gail goes up, missing a missile dropkick but managing a rollup with tights for two. Madison cheats again and Eat Defeat gives us a new champion at 5:54. Really?
Eric is on the phone with presumably his wife and says Garrett will be coming back to her in a bag after Thursday. Ray comes up all panicked and says they have to do something about Abyss. Maybe the beating him down stuff isn't working. The camera is on Eric's stomach for some reason. Ray freaks and says Eric needs to do something. Eric says Ray needs to do something as I have images of Spaceballs dancing in my head. They go off to find Abyss.
We recap Jeff vs. Jeff where Hardy says that he needed to get back to his roots. Jarrett says that Hardy has burned everything how many times and been selfish how many times? Hardy says he doesn't deserve another chance but asks for another anyway.
Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
It's a good move to put Hardy in there with Jarrett for his first big match back as Jarrett is almost a guaranteed decent match. Hardy comes out with something like a viking hat on that resembles a ram's head. Hardy comes in and hits an immediate Twist of Fate to end it in 4 seconds. What just happened???
Jarrett wants to do it again so he jumps Hardy and that's all cool I guess. The two opening bells were exactly one minute apart.
Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
Jarrett jumped him so he has an early advantage, hitting the move where Hardy is in the 619 position and Jarrett hits a running hip shot to the back of the head. Big Boss Man used it a lot. That really needs a name. All Jarrett so far as Hardy sells like he's a master at. The guy may be a screwup but he can make you believe he fell out of a building like few others can. Hardy fights back with elbows and punches but Jarrett hooks a sleeper. They slug it out and Hardy grabs a jackknife cover for two. Both finishers are countered and Jarrett tries the figure four. Hardy rolls through for the pin at 5:47.
Jarrett hits Hardy with a chair as he goes up the ramp. Jarrett shouts that it's over when he says it's over. He throws Hardy back in the ring and Hebner is forced back in. Jarrett hits the Stroke and says count but Hardy rolls him up and pins Jarrett again after we'll say about 20 seconds.
Some people congratulate Hardy in the back, including AJ which is a big moment in a way.
Roode says that he was Beer Money and he was Fourtune. He's the leader of the new generation and that he'll do whatever it takes to beat AJ and flips the camera off.
We recap Roode winning the title and his heel turn. He didn't want to risk losing his other shot and turned heel to make sure it worked. Then they used Roode vs. Storm on Impact to make sure that they didn't have a long build to a big time PPV match which could have drawn money. I mean, they managed a 1.3 in the ratings for crying out loud. CELEBRATION BABY!!! AJ said he'll fight him for injuring Storm, who is the real star in all of this.
TNA World Title: Robert Roode vs. AJ Styles
After some big match intros we're ready to go. It's 10:30 so they have a pretty decent amount of time to use. Roode bails to the corner to start. Nothing to see in the first two minutes or so as Roode stalls. They trade some punches but they're in whatever gear is below first. AJ had a legit ankle injury coming into this but I'm not sure how severe it was. AJ dodges a charge to send Roode to the floor and hits a running dive off the apron.
It's pretty clear that ankle is messing him up. Roode rams him into the apron as I don't think they're going to go higher up in the gears than this, which if AJ is badly hurt on his ankle is certainly understandable. AJ tries a springboard back in the ring but has no elevation at all. Off to a gutwrench (hold not suplex) by Roode which AJ gets out of quickly. Blockbuster is broken up and AJ tries a superplex. Roode heabutts him down but AJ pops up and gets that superplex this time.
This is reminiscent of Mania 14 as Shawn had to wrestle a totally different style due to his back injury. AJ hooks the fireman's carry into the backbreaker and AJ I think botches a springboard move. Roode rolls him up and throws a foot on the rope for two. Big spinebuster gets two for Roode. The Impact Zone is weird as you can hear individual fans throughout the show. AJ grabs a suplex and possibly got a hammerlock slam in there too.
He amazes me by managing a decent 450 springboard splash but Roode rolls out of the way. AJ hitting the mat was painful looking. The Clash is broken up and there's the crossface that AJ tapped to on Impact a few weeks back. AJ breaks out of it through head grease but can't get the Clash. He tries the springboard forearm but it's more like a crossbody, getting two.
Roode sneaks in a low blow but the referee gets some of it too. That gets two on AJ so Roode yells and gets small packaged for two. Styles snaps off an enziguri as my jaw somehow drops lower at his ability to do this on a bad ankle. AJ goes off on Roode, throwing in a low blow to knock him to the floor. He totally misses a suicide dive though and Styles is in trouble. Fisherman's suplex gets two and Roode isn't sure what to do. Styles busts out the Pele but the Clash is countered into a quick rollup with tights for the pin at 19:33.
Results
Robbie E. b Eric Young Pin after a shot from Rob Terry
Mexican America b. Ink Inc. - Sarita pinned Toxxine after hitting her with a title belt
Austin Aries b. Kid Kash and Jesse Sorensen Rollup to Kash
Rob Van Dam b. Christopher Daniels Five Star Frog Splash
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson went to a double disqualification
Abyss/Mr. Anderson b. Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Gail Kim b. Velvet Sky Eat Defeat
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Twist of Fate
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Small Package
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Crucifix
Robert Roode b. AJ Styles Rollup with a handful of tights
Quick Results
Raw
John Morrison b. Dolph Ziggler Rollup
Mason Ryan b. JTG Full nelson slam
Alberto Del Rio b. Kofi Kingston Cross Armbreaker
Jack Swagger b. Santino Marella Ankle Lock
Awesome Truth b. John Cena/Zack Ryder Miz pinned Cena after R-Truth tripped Cena
NXT
Tyson Kidd b. Trent Barretta One Leg Boston Crab
Jimmy Uso b. JTG Top Rope Splash
Johnny Curtis/Derrick Bateman b. Titus O'Neil/Percy Watson High/Low to O'Neil
Impact Wrestling
Crimson b. D'Angelo Dinero Red Sky
Garrett Bischoff b. Gunner via DQ when Ric Flair interfered
Jesse Sorensen b. Zema Ion Reverse Spinning DDT
Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Velvet Sky/Mickie James Eat Defeat
Ronnie/Eric Young b. Robbie E/Rob Terry Ronnie pinned Robbie E after a splash
AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels Styles Clash
Abyss/Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson b. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Robert Roode b. James Storm Pin after Storm collapsed
Smackdown
Sheamus b. Christian High Cross
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal Dream Street
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan World's Strongest Slam
Big Show b. ???/???/??? - WMD
Alicia Fox b. Tamina Flip Legdrop
Hunico/Epico b. Usos Swanton to Jey
Wade Barrett b. Randy Orton Rollup
Ring of Honor
Young Bucks b. Bravado Brothers More Bang For Your Buck to Harlem
American Wolves b. Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong Richards pinned Elgin after a dragon sleeper
Turning Point 2011
Robbie E. b Eric Young Pin after a shot from Rob Terry
Mexican America b. Ink Inc. - Sarita pinned Toxxine after hitting her with a title belt
Austin Aries b. Kid Kash and Jesse Sorensen Rollup to Kash
Rob Van Dam b. Christopher Daniels Five Star Frog Splash
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson went to a double disqualification
Abyss/Mr. Anderson b. Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Gail Kim b. Velvet Sky Eat Defeat
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Twist of Fate
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Small Package
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Crucifix
Robert Roode b. AJ Styles Rollup with a handful of tights
Impact got a 1.22, down just a bit from last week.
Smackdown
Date: November 11, 2011
Location: Liverpool Echo Arena, Liverpool, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T
Another week, another Smackdown. With Randy having beaten Cody officially to end their feud (at least in theory) it should be interesting to see where they go with it. Also it seems like Bryan and the case have been activated into a possibility of him cashing in so we have that wild card in the title hunt now. Other than that it'll be more build for the PPV I'd assume. Let's get to it.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is Winter. The season, not the hot British chick.
We hear about Team Orton (Orton, Sheamus, Kofi, Cara, Ryan) vs. Team Barrett (Barrett, Rhodes, Swagger, Hunico, Christian even though the Canadian is now injured so that might be needing a replacement). To people that say all of the WWE guys are the same, this match has three Americans, an Irishman, a Ghanian, two Mexicans, a Welsh guy, an Englishman and a Canadian. That's a pretty eclectic mix wouldn't you say?
Here's Randy to open the show. Orton has a great tattoo job on his arms. His shirt is roughly the same color as his skin and I couldn't tell where it ended and where the tattoos began when he did his pose. He talks about how he doesn't play well with others as every team he's been on has imploded, usually due to him hurting them. Orton has no problem being the captain so he can beat up Rhodes and Christian again. He talks about not knowing Swagger or Hunico all that well but having no problem taking care of them as well. This draws out Barrett.
Barrett says the problems he's given Orton before will be nothing compared to the ones he'll have at Survivor Series. They've both been in groups and he's always risen to the top of them. Orton is a natural born predator that no one will ever trust. Barrett wants the world title and he has to get Randy out of the way to do that. Orton is staring off into space during this. Barrett: Are you even listening to me. Orton: Actually no I'm not. Well that's just rude. An RKO is threatened so here's Christian in a neck brace.
Christian calls Randy the Yoko Ono of his team in Beatles reference #1 of the night (great drinking game). Christian takes credit for Barrett beating Sheamus last week, saying that he inspires people to be better. He was offered the captain spot but he declined it due to his injuries. Barrett has Christian's full endorsement though. Here comes the beatdown as well as Sheamus for the save. Teddy comes out and I must have a bad ear infection or something because he doesn't make a tag match for the main event. Instead it's Christian vs. Sheamus and Barrett vs. Orton. Nice little change of pace.
Christian vs. Sheamus
Sheamus runs him over to start and takes over quickly. Christian begs off and gets the forearms to the chest for his trouble. There's a gorilla press and Christian bails to the floor. Christian gets back in first and walks into the slingshot shoulder. Christian finally sends him into the post to take over and adds a missile dropkick for two. Out to the floor and Cole gets on my nerves already. Christian tries a dive over the top but Sheamus catches him with ease.
After a break Christian has a chinlock on and is in control. They slug it out and I think you know who wins there. Christian goes up and jumps into a punch to the ribs, which is the same counter I saw on an old tape I was watching a few moments ago. The Canadian tries the sunset flip out of the corner but jumps into the Irish Curse for two. Christian dives into his second fallaway slam of the match but pops up for a dropkick to put Sheamus down again.
Sheamus charges into the corner and gets caught by the Pendulum Kick. A tornado DDT gets two for Christian. Sheamus does the always cool pull yourself up from the corner to the top rope spot and hits the top rope shoulder for two. Brogue Kick and Unprettier both miss but the High Cross is enough to finish this at 10:15 shown of 13:45.
We recap Bryan almost cashing in last week but walking into the Slam instead.
Bryan talks to AJ and Kaitlyn and says he didn't know he was almost going to cash in. He has a non-title match tonight. AJ and Kaitlyn imply sexual interest if he's champ. Henry pops up and says it's not that easy to be champ. Bryan gets in his face, saying he's cashing in at Mania and he'll win. Henry says Bryan has guts, and they'll be all over the ring later.
Video on Ezekiel Jackson of all people. He's strong and that's about it. This comes off almost like a heel video.
Teddy Long is with Charles Robinson and says be on your game tonight in the Usos match. This is rather pointless. Here's Aksana who hits on Teddy again and innuendo is made. Teddy wants Aksana to be in Alicia's corner later tonight so she can get experience. Aksana thinks she's Rihanna. More innuendo is made. Next.
Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal
Mahal is called mysterious. How is he mysterious? They flat out explained his backstory like two weeks after he started wrestling. Mahal takes over to start and Cole makes fun of DiBiase hanging out with fans. It's implied that DiBiase has given up his dad's money. Dream Street ends this at 1:06.
Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry
Big Show is banned from ringside. Bryan has Ride of the Valkyries again but it's a rock version. It's an improvement over the old song. Booker says Bryan has never had a girlfriend in his life. Oh give me a break. Are we really afraid of the drawing power of Gail Kim now? Henry takes him to the floor and rams him into the barricade then pushes Bryan's head against the steps.
Back in the ring and the fans try to get behind Bryan. Henry misses a charge and Bryan hits a missile dropkick and Henry is staggered. The kicks put Henry down and Bryan actually gets the LeBell Lock on....kind of. Henry does the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter and pounds Daniel down in the corner. Henry splashes him but pulls up at two. Bryan says bring it on so Henry hits the Slam for the pin at 3:45.
Henry goes for a chair to break the leg but Bryan gets it away and hits Henry with it. Three World's Strongest Slams later, Bryan regrets that chair shot. Henry sets to Pillmanize the leg but the sound of music stops him. Why? I don't know. I guess he can't jump while music is playing. Henry gets the chair and Show knocks it out of his hand. They stare each other down and Henry bails.
Show says watch his match and he'll show Henry something impressive.
Big Show vs. ???/???/???
They're three unnamed jobbers. They get Show down for a second but one of them kicks him which wakes him up. Two take a double chokeslam and the third tries to leave. Show chases him down and the big punch ends this at 1:20.
Henry says that was nothing and that he's impressed Big Show, which he'll do again at Survivor Series.
Video on Mania tickets.
Tamina vs. Alicia Fox
Nattie is on commentary and Aksana is with Alicia. Rosa is with Tamina. Tamina is pounded down in the corner but remembers she's Samoan and no sells it. After about a minute of beating her down, Tamina gets caught with an elbow. Nattie says she and Beth are now called Pin-Up Strong. What is that, their third name? Alicia hits a front flip legdrop for the pin at 2:00. Is there a point to any of these matches with the girls anymore?
Sheamus is asked if he's a hot head after seeing clips of his brawl with Barrett last week. He denies it and says he's about having a good time, be it presenting an award to Justin Bieber at the MTV Europe Awards of hanging out with his cousin Beaker (POP). He pretends to be mad at Striker then smiles.
Hunico/Epico vs. Usos
Primo comes out with the Hispanic team. Booker says they're like gremlins. Ok so Hunico is in the white shirt. Remember when the Usos debuted and their deal was that there were civilized Samoans out there that weren't all crazy? Now they do that Siva Tao thing. I love rewritting kayfabe. Epico starts off with we'll say Jey. Epico is Primo's cousin which is true in real life and on TV it seems.
The heels take over on Jimmy and take turns beating him down. Why are Mexican/Hispanic themed teams always heels? I think LAX were faces for awhile and that's about it. Lukewarm tag brings in Jey who beats on Hunico but Epico makes the save. Primo tries to cheat so Jey kicks Epico down. Hunico hits a Swanton on Jey for the pin at 2:45.
There's a gang beatdown post match as the fans cheer for Sin Cara. He's not booked on the tour though so the heels beat Jimmy down with ease. Time for the international war period?
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett
Not much to start but that's to be expected. Barrett takes over with a headlock but walks into a dropkick for two. Now it's Orton with the headlock as Cole talks about the bareknuckle thing again. Orton kind of plays heel here, shouting that Barrett is the hometown boy before covering him. Barrett gets a boot up in the corner to put Orton down. That and an elbow drop get two.
Out to the floor for some brawling and in a cool sequence, Orton tries to send him into the steps but Barrett jumps on top of them then kicks the steps into Orton. Wade sends him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Orton in a chinlock and Barrett's hair is a mess. Pumphandle slam gets two. A big boot puts Orton on the floor and it's back to the chinlock.
Boss Man Slam gets two. Barrett sets for a middle rope elbow but only one person per company can use the same move so Orton breaks it up and hits a superplex for a delayed two. They slug it out and Orton starts his ending sequence with the powerslam and DDT. RKO is loaded up but Barrett shoves him off. He pokes Orton in the eye and rolls him up for the pin at 9:50 shown of 13:20.
Results
Sheamus b. Christian High Cross
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal Dream Street
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan World's Strongest Slam
Big Show b. ???/???/??? - WMD
Alicia Fox b. Tamina Flip Legdrop
Hunico/Epico b. Usos Swanton to Jey
Wade Barrett b. Randy Orton Rollup
Saturday
Ring of Honor
Date: November 12, 2011
Location: Davis Arena, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuiness
It's the final final week of the tapings from the first batch of Louisville shows. They've taped five more weeks so they have a lot more material ready. The main event tonight is the House of Truth vs. the American Wolves so we have some stories going on here. There isn't much else to say here so let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's tag team stuff where it's really hard to tell if the Briscos are faces or heels. I know they're supposed to be heels but it's really not clear.
Bravado Brothers vs. Young Bucks
The Bravado Brothers are controversial don't you know. If you don't know, Kelly will tell you. Their names are Lancelot and Harlem. Ok then. The Bucks are Generation Me and we get a reference to them being disrespected by Booker T at the WWF taping. The Bravados look a bit flamboyant which you should get the meaning of in wrestling speak. Harlem vs. Nick to start us off with Harlem hammering away.
The Bucks take over with their arm work but the problem comes down to the same thing I believe Lance Storm says: they look like they'd be better suited to date a 15 year old than to beat up grown men. The Bucks clear the ring and at least have better looking attire than what they had in TNA. Lancelot takes over with an axe kick and a blue thunder bomb for two on Matt.
There's a bicycle kick as I'm pretty much just guessing which of these guys is which. Harlem (thank you Kevin) hits a big flip die to take out both of the Bucks, getting two on Jeremy (I can't remember their ROH names or their TNA names. Does it really matter?). A double team move gets two on let's say Nick. The Bravados are Native Americans so we hear about great Native American wrestlers like Jack Brisco and Wahoo McDaniel and Tatanka. Kelly: Don't laugh!
Nick does his speed dives and the Bucks take over. They hit More Bang For Your Buck (rolling fireman's carry slam followed by a 450 followed by a moonsault) for the pin on Harlem at 6:10. The finishing sequence is cool but I still have no idea what their names are, which probably isn't a good thing.
The tag champs say they'll beat the Briscos. Here's the All Night Express who says they've been forgotten about. I think that's because the Briscos beat them in back to back matches. Kenny calls the WGTT a couple of ducks. Never let him near a mic again. Please. Titus says nothing of note. What in the world was the point of this segment?
Time for Inside ROH to waste more time. This time it's about Kevin Steen, whom we've needed an explanation about for awhile now. We see him turning on his partner El Generico and how Steve Corino was the one pulling his strings. They feuded a bunch of times and had a career vs. mask match where Generico beat him.
Since a contract means nothing in wrestling, Steen wants to come back now. Corino realized the error of his ways and tried to mentor people. Steen came to a show (Best in the World, which I think we've seen in its entirety given how much they've shown from it) to apologize. And of course he beat up everyone in the ring at the time, namely Corino. Steen tried to beat up the owner at some show but is now threatening to sue Cornette. The whole contract thing really does mean nothing in wrestling does it?
More talking as Lethal says Mike Bennett needs to stop saying he beat Lethal.
Steve Corino says there's a monster in the form of Kevin Steen and Corino just needs five minutes of Cornette's time.
Video on Roderick Strong vs. Kyle O'Reilly from a few weeks ago as this feud takes forever to get anywhere.
Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong vs. American Wolves
Here's ANOTHER break before the match. It's a brawl to start as we have a ton of time on this show. That's just what I want: a long Davey Richards match. Richards is sent to the floor and I think we're starting with elgin vs. Edwards. Richards goes up and hits a missile dropkick for two. Off to the champ and it's time for strikes! Off to Elgin as McGuiness admits that Richards isn't much of a draw.
Edwards gets beaten down for awhile but it's off to Richards who kicks more. Would a headlock be too much to ask for? A Tajiri Elbow is countered into Abyss' Shock Treatment backbreaker for two. Off to Elgin and Richards shrugs off a bunch of chops and punches. Strong hits a dropkick to take over and it's back to Elgin. Richards sends both guys to the floor and it's a blind tag to Edwards. Here are stereo dives to take the heels out as we run down house shows.
Back in and Eddie hits a bad enziguri to Strong for two. An over the shoulder Stunner hits and it's off to a half crab which Edwards calls an Achilles hold for some reason. They fight to the apron and Strong drops him down onto the apron with a belly to back suplex. After a break Elgin is suplexing Edwards. Powerslam gets two. Edwards gets a double knee smash to both guys and it's off to Richards.
RICHARDS USES SOMETHING OTHER THAN A STRIKE!!! I need my medicine! Kelly puts over ROH as the real wrestling company as Richards rolls through to an ankle lock because that's his finishing move even if it makes no sense from a psychology perspective. A German gets two on Elgin. The Wolves go up but both miss and a sidewalk slam gets two for Elgin.
Edwards is down from being shoved off the top and the idiot fans say this is awesome. Elgin picks up both Wolves at once and slams them down to put all four guys down. They slug it out (of course) and the ROH fans all drool over how stupid these strikes are. The Wolves hit a pair of double stomps off the top for two on Elgin. An ankle lock doesn't beat Elgin again and we miss whatever big move Elgin hits as the camera was on Edwards and Strong. Martini tries to cheat as Elgin has Richards pinned. The same thing happens while Edwards chokes Elgin out. Richards gets the pin at 18:08.
Results
Young Bucks b. Bravado Brothers More Bang For Your Buck to Harlem
American Wolves b. Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong Richards pinned Elgin after a dragon sleeper
Turning Point 2011
Date: November 13, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
It's time for Turning Point and to be honest, I had to look up the card to remember anything more than about two matches. The title match is slapped on because they've burned through their big PPV main event level matches for the sake of a TV rating that came and went. Other than that we have a lot of matches that don't mean a lot and two that were added since Impact to flesh out the card a little bit. Let's get to it.
The opening video is a bit different, probably because they have no idea what the point of this show is. It's about....Richard Nixon and Bobby Roode? Whatever.
TV Title: Robbie E vs. Eric Young
Apparently losing to a reality TV star after losing your previous title shot means you get another one on PPV. There's the locking up with the referee and the victory lap from Young before anything happens. They speed things up to start and Young sends him to the floor. They do some basic fast paced stuff and nothing is really worth writing down. Robbie hooks a chinlock and then a second one a few moments later.Nice way to fire up a crowd to open a PPV guys.
Orlando is fired up for this. I guess they were jealous from not having their show for a few weeks. Young gets up and hits a Stunner to escape and both guys are a bit dazed. Eric starts Hulking Up and takes his pants off, revealing GTW trunks. What is the appeal of this guy? I'd assume it's that he's not interesting or talented enough to be anything but comedy relief but I'll be nice and assume otherwise.
Eric fights back with a forearm, dropkick and belly to belly for two. There's a top rope elbow and he's no Shawn Michaels. The other Rob saves the other Robbie and Eric strips again. Get this over with already. Eric dives to the floor to take them both out but Rob gets in an extra shot, allowing Robbie E to get the pin and the title at about 7:00.
Video on Mexican America vs. Ink Inc.
AJ and Roode are here.
Tag Titles: Mexican America vs. Ink Inc.
Ok so it's a six person tag with Sarita and Toxxine or whatever her name is in as well. This was about a beating that injured Neal from like 6 months ago which is being mentioned now because we've had too much to talk about since then. Anarquia vs. Moore gets us going but it's off to Neal quickly. Jesse and Hernandez get in each others' faces and yell at each other a lot as the fans chant USA. I'm assuming it's for Ink Inc, but the Mexicans are Americans so who knows?
The big showdown goes nowhere and it's back to Moore who gets caught by the power game for a bit. Ink Inc speeds things up and it's off to Anarquia. Boring stuff so far and we have a Pork sign in the front row. Tazz praises Sarita for jumping up and down on the apron like he's a 12 year old trying to sound mature. Off to Neal who gets caught by a slingshot shoulder by Hernandez.
Mexican America takes over on Neal as I'm trying to imagine Ricky Morton with that kind of hair. It really isn't working. Off to a chinlock by Anarquia for a bit of rest. Some SuperMex power double teaming doesn't work as Anarquia misses his assisted dive. Neal tags in the chick and it's Toxxine vs. Sarita. The tattoed chick dominates until Hernandez makes the save and things break down.
We get to the comedy of the match as Toxxine and Neal pulls Anarquia's pants down to show the involuntary tattoo back there. And then Sarita hits Toxxine in the back with the belt for the pin at 8:34. You know, because they haven't made the titles even more worthless already. Didn't they have something to do with Hulk for like fifteen minutes?
Aries and Kash are in league to take care of Sorensen tonight. My mind wanders as Kash talks but I think he mentioned cutting Sorensen with his knife. Aries has a cape and stays behind to get more face time. His words, not mine.
X-Division Title: Jesse Sorensen vs. Austin Aries vs. Kid Kash
Aries leaves Kash to fight Sorensen on his own to start. Sorensen gets beaten down quickly as things start fast. They're playing up the whole 2-1 idea here as Sorensen gets rid of one but has the other waiting on him. Sorensen is like screw it and hits a huge dive to take them both out, getting two on Aries. Kash gets Sorensen down and tries to steal the title but Aries makes the save.
Kash hits a low blow now but Aries reminds him of the plan. Sorensen sends Kash to the floor via a nice dropkick (every rookie knows how to do that move very well anymore) but his cross body only gets two on Aries as Kash is back in. We get a slick double team move as Kash hooks a surfboard and Aries kicks away. They take turns chopping Sorensen and this is looking bleak.
Sorensen grabs a backdrop to send Kash to the floor out of nowhere but he's still outnumbered. I mean, he is fighting A Double after all. Kash pulls him to the floor so Aries can hit the awesome dive for two back in the ring as now it's Kash that doesn't want to lose. The heels argue a bit but beat on Sorensen a bit more. Aries goes up and does an Eddie Guerrero imitation (he passed away six years ago today) but lands on the knees. Wouldn't that hut really badly?
Kash was up top and misses his old fat man moonsault. Sorensen makes his comeback and gets two on Aries with a neckbreaker. Kash keeps making the save as I guess he needs the exercise at his age. Sorensen makes the heels hit each other with clotheslines and goes up. Kash gets up and hooks a superplex and then the Moneymaker (double underhook piledriver) to kill Sorensen dead but Aries steals the pin at about 13:00.
AJ says tonight is about revenge and he'll take the title tonight to get rid of Roode once and for all. Solid angry promo here.
Christopher Daniels vs. Rob Van Dam
This is no DQ. Why? No particular reason, but gimmicks make matches better right Russo? Daniels asks how we got to this stipulation so fast and says he's not a hardcore wrestler. Instead, let's make this a regular wrestling match. The fans boo what they had already come in expecting to see and RVD eventually shakes hands. Daniels pulls him in because every face has to be an idiot.
They go to the mat quickly and Daniels is sent running. Back in and there's the monkey flip to put Daniels in trouble. Why is it so rare to see Daniels in something not involving AJ? A kick puts Daniels down but he's an old X-Division guy so he doesn't sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Daniels but RVD escapes and hits a quick Rolling Thunder for no cover. A slingshot legdrop has Daniels in trouble but he takes over again quickly.
Daniels hooks a neck crank as this match is slowing down a lot. That's not exactly a bad thing but it's noticeable. Death Valley Driver gets two for Daniels. A running forearm in the corner puts Van Dam down. They slug it out and RVD puts him down with a clothesline. The springboard kick puts him down too and Daniels sends him to the floor because he was down 6 seconds.
A top rope kick puts Daniels on the floor and he tries to run. Van Dam rams him into the barricade and then hits a running legdrop to Daniels' back as he's draped over said barricade. The fans aren't as into this as you would expect. Back inside and Daniels throws the referee into RVD and drops him with an STO. There's a chair to Van Dam's ribs and a takedown onto the chair for two. Here comes the toolbox and then the screwdriver but Van Dam gets the chair for the Van Daminator. Tazz: Been there, felt that, it sucks. Five Star ends this at 11:13.
The Robs celebrate and Robbie says he's a TV star who will be around for a long time to come. They're going to the club.
We recap Crimson vs. Matt Morgan. It's a dream match according to them. I want whatever sleeping pill that person took because it must be powerful.
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson
It's a power struggle to start and neither guy can get anywhere with that. Test of strength doesn't go anywhere as Crimson lets go, which is kind of a heel move. Crimson takes over with a cravate and then some strikes which Tenay says he's really good at. I don't recall him being anything above average at them but that works. A clothesline puts Crimson on the floor as they're playing up the idea that they're evenly matched.
They fight on the floor and Morgan eventually takes over, possibly due to Crimson having a bad knee. Side slam gets two back in the ring for Morgan. Crimson fights back with a forearm/cross body. A release belly to belly overhead suplex gets two. Morgan fights back with a chokeslam for two. They're playing this up like a chess match where neither guy can hit anything to get an extended advantage.
Morgan uses more power stuff but can't get the pin on Crimson which is frustrating him. Crimson tries to reverse a whip but gets caught by a big boot from Morgan. Crimson grabs the Red Sky out of nowhere but Morgan rolls to the ropes, delaying the cover and making it only get two. Morgan says give me your best shot and they slug it out. They do something similar to Cactus Jack and Terry Funk trading weapon shots at the Rumble in I think 98. They get in a brawl and shove the referee down for the weak but required double DQ at 12:05.
There's a pull apart brawl after the match.
Scott Steiner and Bully Ray are ready for Abyss and Anderson. Ray talks trash and tells Scott to just keep flexing. Scott says he went to Parts Unknown and found Abyss' girlfriend to find out everything about Abyss. She was a cross between a redneck and a billy goat. After this, Ray has to date her and she's not only ugly but fat. Ray insinuates that Team 3D is the best team ever and Scott says he's the best tag team ever. Oh and don't bring her any food because she's fat. This was HILARIOUS.
Scott Steiner/Bully Ray vs. Abyss/Mr. Anderson
The entrances take forever and it's Anderson vs. Ray to start us off. I'm still trying to figure out why Abyss was a mystery partner last week. Ray runs his mouth a lot as Anderson takes him down with an armbar. Anderson's clotheslines don't work so he uses Amazing Red's double rotation kick instead. Ray suplexes out of a headlock and here's Steiner. Taz and Steiner had coffee earlier. Good to know I guess.
No Abyss yet as Anderson gets two off a clothesline. Anderson takes both of them down but gets crotched on the post. Taz calls it Yambag Yahtzee. Didn't he used to be the human suplex machine? The fans say they love Steiner so he tells them to shut up. They chant louder, thereby making him mad. How much can they love him then? Anderson hits a swinging neckbreaker to take Ray down but we get the old school heel move of coming in to make sure the referee misses the face tag. I love that.
Scott goes up and hits his Angle Slam from up there as we're still waiting on the very hot tag to Abyss. Steiner draws him in as Anderson gets a sunset flip for two. The fans haven't stopped chanting for about three minutes now. He even flips them off and they won't stop. Ray and Steiner yell at each other as Ray comes in. Anderson counters the Bubba Bomb into a DDT and both guys are down.
There are those chants again. I know he's popular but this is insane. We get the double tag and the fans are only a little excited to see Abyss. He beats everyone up and drops Steiner with a slam. Abyss goes up and hits a middle rope splash on the pancake formerly known as Scott Steiner. That gets two as does a chokeslam. The heels double team so Abyss runs them over with a double clothesline.
Anderson gets a blind tag and takes over on apparently the most popular guy in the entire company. Steiner grabs a downward spiral for two on Anderson, who gets booed for kicking out a little bit. Steiner even busts out the Frankensteiner for no cover on Anderson as Abyss got a blind tag of his own and the Black Hole Slam ends this at 11:47.
Post match Immortal beats down Abyss and puts him through a table but he pops up.
Gail/Madison/Karen are ready and this is about Karen looking good as the Knockouts Champion reflects on her as the Knockouts boss. Karen says she and Madison won't come out later.
Video on Velvet Sky who we're still supposed to believe was bullied because girls that look like that and were athletes in high school got treated awfully right?
Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky
Brawl to start and I really can't complain about seeing Velvet in shorts like those. Gail is knocked to the floor and Velvet totally misses a baseball slide but Gail sells it anyway. Back in a crossbody gets two for Sky. Kim takes over and here's Karen on the ramp as the fans chant what sounds like Sloppy Seconds. Gail hooks an abdominal stretch and Velvet fights back with nothing significant.
I'm sorry if I seem totally out of it here but I have zero interest in this show for the most part. Eat Defeat is blocked into a facebuster by Velvet but Karen distracts as Madison comes in to lay out Velvet. That only gets two and Gail goes up, missing a missile dropkick but managing a rollup with tights for two. Madison cheats again and Eat Defeat gives us a new champion at 5:54. Really?
Eric is on the phone with presumably his wife and says Garrett will be coming back to her in a bag after Thursday. Ray comes up all panicked and says they have to do something about Abyss. Maybe the beating him down stuff isn't working. The camera is on Eric's stomach for some reason. Ray freaks and says Eric needs to do something. Eric says Ray needs to do something as I have images of Spaceballs dancing in my head. They go off to find Abyss.
We recap Jeff vs. Jeff where Hardy says that he needed to get back to his roots. Jarrett says that Hardy has burned everything how many times and been selfish how many times? Hardy says he doesn't deserve another chance but asks for another anyway.
Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
It's a good move to put Hardy in there with Jarrett for his first big match back as Jarrett is almost a guaranteed decent match. Hardy comes out with something like a viking hat on that resembles a ram's head. Hardy comes in and hits an immediate Twist of Fate to end it in 4 seconds. What just happened???
Jarrett wants to do it again so he jumps Hardy and that's all cool I guess. The two opening bells were exactly one minute apart.
Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
Jarrett jumped him so he has an early advantage, hitting the move where Hardy is in the 619 position and Jarrett hits a running hip shot to the back of the head. Big Boss Man used it a lot. That really needs a name. All Jarrett so far as Hardy sells like he's a master at. The guy may be a screwup but he can make you believe he fell out of a building like few others can. Hardy fights back with elbows and punches but Jarrett hooks a sleeper. They slug it out and Hardy grabs a jackknife cover for two. Both finishers are countered and Jarrett tries the figure four. Hardy rolls through for the pin at 5:47.
Jarrett hits Hardy with a chair as he goes up the ramp. Jarrett shouts that it's over when he says it's over. He throws Hardy back in the ring and Hebner is forced back in. Jarrett hits the Stroke and says count but Hardy rolls him up and pins Jarrett again after we'll say about 20 seconds.
Some people congratulate Hardy in the back, including AJ which is a big moment in a way.
Roode says that he was Beer Money and he was Fourtune. He's the leader of the new generation and that he'll do whatever it takes to beat AJ and flips the camera off.
We recap Roode winning the title and his heel turn. He didn't want to risk losing his other shot and turned heel to make sure it worked. Then they used Roode vs. Storm on Impact to make sure that they didn't have a long build to a big time PPV match which could have drawn money. I mean, they managed a 1.3 in the ratings for crying out loud. CELEBRATION BABY!!! AJ said he'll fight him for injuring Storm, who is the real star in all of this.
TNA World Title: Robert Roode vs. AJ Styles
After some big match intros we're ready to go. It's 10:30 so they have a pretty decent amount of time to use. Roode bails to the corner to start. Nothing to see in the first two minutes or so as Roode stalls. They trade some punches but they're in whatever gear is below first. AJ had a legit ankle injury coming into this but I'm not sure how severe it was. AJ dodges a charge to send Roode to the floor and hits a running dive off the apron.
It's pretty clear that ankle is messing him up. Roode rams him into the apron as I don't think they're going to go higher up in the gears than this, which if AJ is badly hurt on his ankle is certainly understandable. AJ tries a springboard back in the ring but has no elevation at all. Off to a gutwrench (hold not suplex) by Roode which AJ gets out of quickly. Blockbuster is broken up and AJ tries a superplex. Roode heabutts him down but AJ pops up and gets that superplex this time.
This is reminiscent of Mania 14 as Shawn had to wrestle a totally different style due to his back injury. AJ hooks the fireman's carry into the backbreaker and AJ I think botches a springboard move. Roode rolls him up and throws a foot on the rope for two. Big spinebuster gets two for Roode. The Impact Zone is weird as you can hear individual fans throughout the show. AJ grabs a suplex and possibly got a hammerlock slam in there too.
He amazes me by managing a decent 450 springboard splash but Roode rolls out of the way. AJ hitting the mat was painful looking. The Clash is broken up and there's the crossface that AJ tapped to on Impact a few weeks back. AJ breaks out of it through head grease but can't get the Clash. He tries the springboard forearm but it's more like a crossbody, getting two.
Roode sneaks in a low blow but the referee gets some of it too. That gets two on AJ so Roode yells and gets small packaged for two. Styles snaps off an enziguri as my jaw somehow drops lower at his ability to do this on a bad ankle. AJ goes off on Roode, throwing in a low blow to knock him to the floor. He totally misses a suicide dive though and Styles is in trouble. Fisherman's suplex gets two and Roode isn't sure what to do. Styles busts out the Pele but the Clash is countered into a quick rollup with tights for the pin at 19:33.
Results
Robbie E. b Eric Young Pin after a shot from Rob Terry
Mexican America b. Ink Inc. - Sarita pinned Toxxine after hitting her with a title belt
Austin Aries b. Kid Kash and Jesse Sorensen Rollup to Kash
Rob Van Dam b. Christopher Daniels Five Star Frog Splash
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson went to a double disqualification
Abyss/Mr. Anderson b. Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Gail Kim b. Velvet Sky Eat Defeat
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Twist of Fate
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Small Package
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Crucifix
Robert Roode b. AJ Styles Rollup with a handful of tights
Quick Results
Raw
John Morrison b. Dolph Ziggler Rollup
Mason Ryan b. JTG Full nelson slam
Alberto Del Rio b. Kofi Kingston Cross Armbreaker
Jack Swagger b. Santino Marella Ankle Lock
Awesome Truth b. John Cena/Zack Ryder Miz pinned Cena after R-Truth tripped Cena
NXT
Tyson Kidd b. Trent Barretta One Leg Boston Crab
Jimmy Uso b. JTG Top Rope Splash
Johnny Curtis/Derrick Bateman b. Titus O'Neil/Percy Watson High/Low to O'Neil
Impact Wrestling
Crimson b. D'Angelo Dinero Red Sky
Garrett Bischoff b. Gunner via DQ when Ric Flair interfered
Jesse Sorensen b. Zema Ion Reverse Spinning DDT
Gail Kim/Madison Rayne b. Velvet Sky/Mickie James Eat Defeat
Ronnie/Eric Young b. Robbie E/Rob Terry Ronnie pinned Robbie E after a splash
AJ Styles b. Christopher Daniels Styles Clash
Abyss/Jeff Hardy/Mr. Anderson b. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Robert Roode b. James Storm Pin after Storm collapsed
Smackdown
Sheamus b. Christian High Cross
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal Dream Street
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan World's Strongest Slam
Big Show b. ???/???/??? - WMD
Alicia Fox b. Tamina Flip Legdrop
Hunico/Epico b. Usos Swanton to Jey
Wade Barrett b. Randy Orton Rollup
Ring of Honor
Young Bucks b. Bravado Brothers More Bang For Your Buck to Harlem
American Wolves b. Michael Elgin/Roderick Strong Richards pinned Elgin after a dragon sleeper
Turning Point 2011
Robbie E. b Eric Young Pin after a shot from Rob Terry
Mexican America b. Ink Inc. - Sarita pinned Toxxine after hitting her with a title belt
Austin Aries b. Kid Kash and Jesse Sorensen Rollup to Kash
Rob Van Dam b. Christopher Daniels Five Star Frog Splash
Matt Morgan vs. Crimson went to a double disqualification
Abyss/Mr. Anderson b. Scott Steiner/Bully Ray Black Hole Slam to Steiner
Gail Kim b. Velvet Sky Eat Defeat
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Twist of Fate
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Small Package
Jeff Hardy b. Jeff Jarrett Crucifix
Robert Roode b. AJ Styles Rollup with a handful of tights