Trust

[LSN80]

I found something very interesting last week, when PM'ing someone who I consider a friend on this site. There's been some things going on in my life that I won't get into here, but I felt comfortable telling said friend virtually the entire aspect of the story. The strange thing is, I had luch earlier in the day with a friend Ive been extremely cloe with for 15 years, and didn't tell him anything but minor details. I found it someone strane that, although we've gotten to know each other over the past few months on the site, we're essentially strangers to one another. Which got me thinking.

I look at Wrestlezone as a family of sorts. To me, it's more then peopleto discuss wrestling with, shoot the breeze ablout current topics together, and debate wrestling, sports, or the like. I have a fairly active social life as well, so its not like Im lacking for people outside of the Internet. I have a wonderful wife, great friends, and a family Im close with.

So it got me thinking if other people are the same in some way. If, when we have issues, do we feel that comfort level, that trust, to talk to people on here when issues arise? I know I certainly do. This isn't a thread to name names, although you can if you like. Wth me, you know how you are. Rather, there are questions I want answered.

Are there people on Wrestlezone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with?

If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details?

Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life?

Do you find the Internet, in general, an easier place to truly be yourself? Is that a good or a bad thing?
Again, there's no need here to name names, this isn't a "what poster do you trust the most?" thread. This is about how one does or does not see Wrestlezone as a family, with people they can trust, and how they got there. You don't have to answer all the questions, even, there just out there as starting points, if you will. I look forward to your responses.

LSN

 

[Hyorinmaru]

There are a few people I would tell the intiamte details of my life that post on here (I haven't yet but I more than likely will at some point). This didn't happen over night either, I've been here for over 3 years and when I first started I didn't tell anyone anything about me.

After a while I became friends with people and started talking about personal stuff in the barroom/GSD/Cage and it just got easier for me where it's to the point I'll tell anyone on here a lot of things about myself.

I think it's easier to share intimate details on here because odds are you'll never meet the person you're telling. If they don't approve oh well they live across the country/ in another country. It's alot easeier that way I think. (for me it is anyway).

 

[Chardee Macdennis]

Interesting question. I'm in a unique position, because I still regularly see about 15-20 friends from high school. Though, most of us wen't to different colleges, we've all remained close friends. That being said, about 4 or 5 of those friends, I share everything with. They're like brothers, really. However, the remaining 10 or so, I'm not so quick to throw out personal business. I've not been on this site long enough to really confide in anyone, with the OP - LSN, being the exception. There are a few others, that I'm sure, with a little more interaction, I'd certainly be able to see myself making the connection with and if and when that time comes, it'd be easier for me to discuss personal matters with them, then it would be to do wo with some other RL friends. Part of it most certainly comes from the fact that any embarrassment I may have felt telling these things, goes right out the window when I know the chance of actually meeting the "internet freind" is slim to none. Another reason is, sometimes, simply through internet interactions, you can come to a pretty sound conclusion about their personality. Again, I've never met LSN (though that could, and hopefully will, easily change, as we're from the same area) but I instantly thought of him as someone I could and do trust.

 

[Xemmy]

Are there people on Wrestlezone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with? There are only one or two people on here that I would feel comfortable sharing my personal life with. It doesn't take a genius to figure out who those people are.

If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details? I enjoy talking to them, and I've decided that they're good people. So I don't have a problem with sharing things with them.

Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life? It's easier to share with people in real life. To start, I like the people I know in real life. On here, I find myself discussing things with assholes far too often, but there are some bright spots. One of the reasons I think it would be easy to share personal things on this site, is that this site still feels very anonymous, despite being able to build a reputation.

I have trouble being myself on the internet, despite other people thinking it's easier. The internet for me, is a place to let loose a particular part of yourself. I don't act like myself on Wrestlezone. I have two modes here, the first being a ranting and raving asshole. The other is a guy that is intentionally respectful to meet an end, gain rep, or make myself look good in some way. But despite that, certain individuals here bring out the best in me, and those are the ones I trust.

 

[Hulk Hogan's Brother]

I don't think I am comfortable at all with sharing the intimate details of my life with strangers however nice I may consider them. Essentially this is because I feel that it is very difficult to truly understand people in real life let alone on the internet. I'm sure that most people here are gentle souls but I feel that it is better to be safe rather than sorry.

However there are people out there who feel differently. There are people who discuss their personal lives on blogs with millions of users having access to some of their personal details. It may be because most people in this world are judgemental assholes. They may not truly understand the nature of the problem but they are pretty quick in handing out a judgement. Very few people can give real good advice. It is always easier to mock than to help. Maybe if you have met a lot of such people in real life you tend to look for a solution online for your problem.

 

[Dave]

Are there people on WrestleZone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with?

Yes, there are a couple of people who I consider to be friends on this site in particular. In fact, there are a couple of people on this site that I have met and are now a part of my extended social circles. For that reason, there are definitely people here who I can trust with the finer details of my life. There are people on here who mean a lot to me and giving them some details on my life is the least I can do. I know that they will be there to answer my questions or give me advice. So yes, I would say that my comfort levels have exponentially grown the longer I have been here.

If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details?

Well, to me, trust is a two-way street. There is a certain member of the posting community on this website that has trusted me with some of the biggest details of their life and in return, I try to give that person the same respect. Letting someone into your life and letting them know the details of your existence is a hard road to take but it is a rewarding one. It is the same as making friends in the real world. You need to be able to trust them with your problems and if they can be trusted with that, then you know that they will be your friend. The same is true of this board.

Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life?

To me, it comes naturally. I am quite an open person, to be fair. If you ask me for advice, then I will give it to you. The same is true here as it is for the wider world. Of course I am going to find it easier to tell a stranger some of my secrets because it wont impact me if it comes back on me. However, I trust my best friends enough that I know it wont come back to haunt me. If it does, then that is the end of the friendship. A break of trust is unacceptable for me and it just so happens that online it is easier to share for most people.

 

[JWGunslinger]

Yes there are one or two that I am comfortable sharing my most personal thoughts with and the reason I am is that I am a very honest person and I really dont feel as though I have anything that I need to hide. This may sound funny since I am relativly new to the site but in general most people on here(especially the guys who are on here alot) are very welcoming and easy to talk to. Plus with everyone on here there are related interests that make talking about many things easier.

As long as you earn my trust and do not insult it then I will talk with you about most anything, and I am not a judgemental person so as long as someone is genuine with me I will openly trust them. I really like what LSN said about Wrestlezone being a kind of family. I'm in college right now so my friends are currently scattered all over the place so I look at WZ as my family away from home.

I do think it is somewhat easier to talk about personal issues on here or any forum for that matter simply because it eliminates that awkward part of talking about personal stuff in person. That's not to say that I wouldnt or dont talk to someone in person about it but yes it is easier to talk about deep personal topics on here.

 

[Dwayne_Jason]

Are there people on Wrestlezone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with?

I'd like to but frankly I don't know anyone well enough to have a one-on-one talk with. I've been here for a decent period of time so I guess I'm building up contacts? But at this point, no I do not.


If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details?

To be frank, its really just about where the conversation heads towards. I think a lot of it has to do with the tone of the conversation. I mean say you're talking about Santino, the tone and the mood of the conversation is light hearted. On the other hand if its something dark--well that's not the right word but...I guess heavy would be the correct word.


Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life?


To be honest its the same really. You don't see the difference if you choose not to. I, like everyone here am a fellow poster on Wrestlezone. If you choose to believe that then its like you're in a room with millions of people just waiting to be your friends (unless you're cm_punk12).


PS: If wrestlezone's a family, who's the father?

 

[Captain Morgan Freeman]

Ive only recently joined the forum (6 days if anyones keeping score) so i havent built up any proper friendships with posters that i could confide with.
I have however gotten my first troll(cm_punk12 seriously check his posts every second one is about me!)
I was really suprised at how close some of the posters on this site are. When i first enterd this site i expected mainly debates on wrestling subjects and people airing their views on certain topics but i guess when your a member long enough its inevitable you will become friendly with people.
Heres hoping we gain many more friends(and trolls) along the way

 

[Nate DaMac]

I'm an open book. I usually share every major thing that happens in my life on here because generally speaking, I like pretty much everyone here. Not only that but with the exception of 2 people(Will & Sparky) no one else here has any access to me outside of this website. The anonymity of the internet prevents me from caring what people think of me here, so there's no real reason to hide anything. Those 2 guys that have access to me outside of here are both guys that I know I can trust and won't spill what I say here into my Facebook account. Even if they do, one quick click of the mouse and their access is denied.

 

[Cena's Little Helper]

Are there people on Wrestlezone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with?

Yes, there are three people who know a lot about me (jmt225, Becker, and IndyJon22).

If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details?

MSN FTW.

Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life?

Nah, not really. Trust rarely comes into play when I decide whether or not I want to tell someone something; it's usually the case that I wouldn't have a problem sharing that information with anyone.

 

[gd]

Not at all. I cringe at the though that someone on here actually knows my real name and age. Really makes be wary I will be snatched up in the night. I do know Coco is Canadian and goes to college, so I guess we're pretty damn tight. I suppose I don't really share details of my personal life with my real friends either. I'm a pretty big loser.

 

[The Crock]

Are there people on Wrestlezone you feel comfortable with enough to share intimate details of your life with?

There sure are people I trust on here. I mean, I spend a fair amount of time on here, I'm bound to develop friendships with people. It's human nature that once you become comfortable enough, you'll start talking to whoever you're around. I obviously only talk to those who I like, but nevertheless, I do feel comfortable with some people. JGlass is probably the person I talk to and trust the most, seeing as he's a pretty solid guy. Other people like Dave are certainly around, I trust him as well.

If so, how did you get to the point where you became comfortable enough to share said details?

You know, we had a common interest, obviously, and they weren't assholes or anything. Just like in real life, you gravitate to those who you find interesting. So after talking I guess you just get a level of familiarity, a trust factor. Honestly, you can't be on a forum like this, unless there are certain people you trust. At some point, you'll let something slip, no matter how hard you try. You might as well just assimilate into the community, enjoy the people you meet and have a nice time.

Is it easier to share details of your life with people on this site, or those you are close with in real life?

I can see it from both sides. While I share a lot with my closest friends in real life, I can see why some people would have a problem with that. By the same token, the people on WrestleZone don't know you, so you can just let whatever you want slip. I see it like this, I only share details of my life with people I actually can trust and people I feel comfortable enough to confide in. Internet, real life, doesn't matter. Trust is all the same, it doesn't matter how or where it's built.

 

[Dagger Dias]

Yes. There are people on Wrestlezone that I feel comfortable enough with to share details of my life outside of this forum with. Doc, in particular, was a good friend to me during my first two years on the forum. Mitch and I have been tag teaming in threads for nearly our whole run at WZ and have kept in touch about our lives outside the forum quite a bit via forum emails too, discussing all sorts of things. Then there's a few others such as Becca, Dave, or NorCal who I recall emailing a few times back in the day, when I had real life issues and needed someone to talk to.

I got to the point of being this comfortable with forum friends by simply beginning conversations via email. Adding people on facebook and chatting there helped some too, as you could see the persons profile/picture and see who they were in real life instead of their forum avatar, but still knowing who they were from interacting on here first. There are a lot of cool people on here who you really should get to know if you haven't already.

Now, it still remains easier to share some aspects of my life with my "real" friends who I interact with in person on a daily basis. Not that forum friends and facebook chatting or emailing them isn't great too, because it is, but some things (unless you have no one to talk to at that moment) are better to discuss with your face to face friends. There were times though when I needed a talk badly about various issues and my face to face friends were asleep or unavailable, but thanks to this forum I have friends worldwide who WERE available during the graveyard hours to send a few emails my way. That's another great thing about having friends on here, we are from all over the world so if your local friends aren't available then someone from on here might be.

I still wouldn't go telling everyone everything. That's a bad idea. It's better to rely more on your in-person friends when you have something personal you might need to talk about. Once someone has earned your trust though, it's ok to share a little more about your life outside of WZ. It's a matter of finding out who you feel you can trust or not, and then having great conversations amongst friends when you do find those who are worth your trust at the forum. The same goes for any other online community you might be a part of.