Teddy Hart's Vision of the Future of Wresting (No, seriously, read this shit)

[X]

This is an article posted earlier today on a few of the news sites with a few quotes from a recent interview with notoriously troubled indy wrestler Teddy Hart. Among the other things on the future of wrestling in his new indy promotion, he wants to combine wrestling with X-Games sports like skateboarding, he wants trained cats and dogs to interfere in matches, and he wants Metroid-like magnet boots. No, seriously, I'm not making this shit up, read on.

- Teddy Hart was a recent guest on The LAW with John Pollock and Wai Ting discussing his plans for the Next Generation Stampede Wrestling promotion, which he is starting up along with Harry Smith and Jack Evans. Below are some highlights and the full interview can be heard at this link…

How Next Generation Stampede Wrestling is different: We have trampolines and we have skateboarders, we have all sorts of things that we want to do. I really like the X-Games, and I'm trying to get guys that are in the X-Games to transfer over into this new sport of wrestling that I'm creating. Certain things to look for in the future - you might end up getting a key instead of winning a fall, because all the falls are 2 out of 3 falls, we'll be wrestling a Mexican Lucha Libre style on that. Instead of winning a belt or something, you might win a key which will unlock a certain weapon that you can use, which may be like a skateboard, or a trampoline, or a special pair of boots that have magnets on the bottom so you can do some things that have never been possible before. Also, the turnbuckles are robotic for the new ring that we're designing. This may be six months away, but guys can adjust the height while they're up there.

Ideas he would like to see in the promotion: I'd like to see mechanically altered weapons and things like that. Chairs that change sizes, ladders that get longer, so you can be on a ladder and press a button and it gives you another three feet or five feet if you want to go higher. Higher is ratings. If you can have the fans all typing into their phone, and you want to see Ted Hart go an extra five feet in their air, everyone's got 30 seconds to type a code into their phone. If the code is in, and I get my combination from the referee, I climb up another five feet.

Working with pets to incorporate into wrestling: I'm training cats to come out to the ring with me, and I'm also trying to train animals to get involved in matches. I'm trying to get safety animals, like a dog, to basically pull the referee's leg before the count of three, little things like that. Or my dog will be carrying a weapon for me, and I would get it off his neck. Potentially if I had a female manager, and she has a cat, and the cat is maybe a good way of getting couple kids out of the audience, and I lure the kids out of the audience and the kids cause a disqualification to happen so I don't have to lose the belt, or something like that.

I'm just...I can't decide if this is the absolute fucking greatest or dumbest idea ever. It's definitely one of the two. Or both. Regardless, I'm watching.

 

[jmt225]

Teddy has been harping that Wrestling/X Games shit for ten years now. He claims he was once close to getting a television deal, with Eric Bischoff as his partner, but the day he was supposed to sign the contract? September 11th, 2001, which to him put off the contract signing for a few days, which turned into forever since the network decided that the last thing America would be interested in any time soon was a new wrestling promotion.

I wish Teddy Hart the absolute best, but this will never come to fruition. As batshit nuts as he can be sometimes, it still really sucks WWE never gave the guy a fair shot. I think with a tight leash around his neck (which WWE has no problem supplying), he would have done some great things in the company.

 

[Remy LaCroix]

^^^ Future Next Generation Stampede Wrestling alumnus right here.

 

[DirtyJosé]

Most of the ideas are crap, to be honest.

 

[klunderbunker]

And where in the world is he expecting to get the money for all this? That sounds like it would cost multiple fortunes.

 

[X]

And where in the world is he expecting to get the money for all this? That sounds like it would cost multiple fortunes.

Something tells me his drug fund will probably be seeing more of his paychecks than the "Train cats and dogs to interfere in wrestling matches, create robotic magnet boots" fund. Something tells me that fund probably doesn't actually exist.

 

[The Dewbliners]

I like that he thinks the size of a chair can change at will.

 

[Uncle Sam]

I just logged in specifically to post this. You bastard, Xfear. You bastard.

 

[X]

I like that he thinks the size of a chair can change at will.

Like, robots dude...robots.

I just logged in specifically to post this. You bastard, Xfear. You bastard.

Excellent. I had the same fear when I logged on, expecting to see either you or Coco had posted this story already. Today I was quickest to the draw though. You're getting lazy in your old age Samwise.

 

[Uncle Sam]

The sad thing is that I'd already heard this bullshit second hand from someone who listens to LAW - I was just waiting for someone to type it up for me.

I'd say it's as bad as the ideas I had when I was eight, but I invented stuff like communism back then and, frankly, it's my concepts now that are more comparable to this dopey shit.

 

[FunKay the Inevitable]

Hart's fighting animals...where have I heard of this concept before?

 

[DirtyJosé]

Why do bitches get cats and bros get dogs? What if I want a fucking cat? Where's my fucking cat?

 

[Poop Master Flex]

Is it me or does he sound toasted out of his fucking mind while saying this. Good thing I live in Calgary, if I ever get bored I can smoke a quarter of pot and laugh my ass off for a few hours, who doesn't want to see a person get mauled by a clouder of cats in a match?

 

[The Bearded One]

I actually think his idea of winning something other than belts is kind of interesting. Kind of like getting perks in Call of Duty. I also like the idea of incorporating trampolines. I mean people liked that basketball league that did it, right?

But everything else is just down right insane. But, to be fair, he does have my interest with the robotic weapons.

 

[The Dragon Saga]

I thought Bret sent Teddy to rehabilitation or something? I think he needs to go back.

 

[X]

There are no amount of Cornette faces to properly convey the look of disbelief, bewilderment, utter disappointment, and then total amusement and excitement that came across my face upon reading this story this morning. All in that order, by the way.

 

[Барбоса]

These are interesting ideas... for the WWE Allstars follow-up

 

[The Dragon Saga]

There are no amount of Cornette faces to properly convey the look of disbelief, bewilderment, utter disappointment, and then total amusement and excitement that came across my face upon reading this story this morning. All in that order, by the way.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

not enough

 

[red ass skull muhfukkah]

Shit would be awesome to watch though. It's like a glimpse of what wrestling will be like 20 or 30 years from now when robots and ladders that change size based on fans typing a code into their phones will be around. Ahh the future, can't wait.

 

[X]

Don't forget the dueling flying cats and dogs with magnet boots Herbert. Can't forget those.

 

[Trill Co$by]

Lol just don't tell PETA about it.

 

[jmt225]

I marked for Matilda when I was a child. Teddy might be on to something here.

 

[X]

Hell yeah dude! Matilda ruled. That was every little kids dream at one point; to have super-powers and be able to reign tall with them. That Roald Dahl bastard was pretty bright.

 

[jmt225]

Hell yeah dude! Matilda ruled. That was every little kids dream at one point; to have super-powers and be able to reign tall with them. That Roald Dahl bastard was pretty bright.

Lol... while I like the movie as well, I was referring to the dog Dynamite Kid and Davey Boy Smith would bring with them to the ring. She was super over with the crowd.