Standing at well over six feet tall, weighing well over two-hundred-and-fifty pounds - a mountain of muscle. Hugely accomplished in the amateur wrestling, professional wrestling, and mixed martial arts worlds. Some would describe him as humourless; a machine created for nothing more than the utter destruction of the unfortunate souls that are his opponents. He spends much of his time in the snowy wilderness, impregnating ex-WWE divas and chopping wood. Welsh. I am, of course, describing Tastycles - the man that has the gall to call Brock Lesnar boring.
But don't listen to Tastycles! As someone who's likely to be in close proximity to him in the near future, I won't hesitate in calling him a dangerous psychopath. Tasty calls Brock Lesnar boring, but you've got to contextualise it. Tasty was in Vietnam. The only remarkable thing, he says, chuckling warmly, was how unmoved he was by the unspeakable horror all around him. Tasty was on board The Titanic. The only excitement he got from the trip, he explains, beer in hand, was when he accidentally punched a hole in the side of the ship. Tasty was there when they dropped the bomb on Hiroshima. The only thing he was impressed by, he later commented while watching Mythbusters, was how unaffected he was by an atomic explosion. "Bust that myth, motherfucker!", he challenged. I couldn't.
You can see why great matches with Kurt Angle might not impress this man; why crushing Hulk Hogan's ribs with a bear hug might not move him. You can understand why the oh so entertaining destruction of a myriad of wrestling greats might not amaze this man as it would a regular man - you or I.
Don't listen to Tastycles.
(Vote for the most interesting man in professional wrestling - Brock Lesnar.)
(Vote for the most interesting man in professional wrestling - Brock Lesnar.)
