"
Busy week, you ready for all this?"
Matt and I were walking the path to the school. It was still pretty warm out here. I heard back home the temperatures were finally starting to drop, but here on the island it was still in the mid eighties with a fair bit of humidity. The long walk to get the mail each day was a workout in and of itself.
"I've been ready. You are the one who has been AWOL the last few weeks."
"I've been tending to the school while waiting on medical clearance."
"That lack of medical clearance didn't stop you from laying out Vega the other night. They still fining you over that?"
Matt nodded his head.
"Yup. Ten thousand even. Enough to rebuild a nightclub."
I had no idea what he was talking about. He was probably just being a dick. Matt was a dick fairly often.
"I'm telling you man, that temper of yours, it's an issue."
"Nah. Name one time when it got me in trouble. I mean other than last week."
"You got us DQed once before Kingdom Come. You got me beat up by Keaton and Triple X...I mean Xander by charging off after them and having me fall into an obvious trap. You got into a shouting match with Vega backstage and got booked into a match where you have nothing to gain. Those are just examples in the last couple months."
"Okay, maybe I have a tiny problem."
"Tiny? Dude when we took our company physicals post Kingdom Come, your blood pressure was like thirty points higher than mine, and I'm three hundred and fifty pounds."
"
Three sixty one according to that physical."
"
More for you to love. Don't think i don't read those fan fics on the internet. I also saw you watching Yuri on Ice the other day"
"
Dude! I am not g...."
"
Whatever. You are still my life mate regardless."
"
Forgive me for this, but speaking of sexuality, you have a pretty big match yourself. Elite Openweight Title, in a cage. You ready for that?"
"
Am I ready to watch Callie Clark in a cage? Bet your fine Latin ass I am."
"
It's been years since you were in a cage match though."
"
Don't remind me. That match was the single most embarrassing moment in WZCW history."
"
You almost had it won, then TSA came down with that net gun...."
"
I SAID DON'T REMIND ME!"
"
It was funny. I've heard of dolphins getting caught in nets, but never whales!"
I shoved Matt before racing to the door and trying my best to keep him locked out. Just some good old fashioned hetero horseplay.
A group of students began to gather the central ring as Matt and I walked back inside the school. He called me over and we climbed onto the apron of one of the rings. The majority of the students sat or took a knee, a few kept standing. Matt signaled for them to calm down.
"
We want to thank you all for choosing to further your career in this business with us. It hasn't been smooth the entire ride, and a time or two Mother Nature has thrown us a curve ball, but these last couple of months have been great. When Mikey and I started this, we had no idea we would get the turn out we did. For us, this is about more than killing free time or making extra money, its about us taking the next step in our storied careers and passing on Hall of Fame knowledge onto the next generation. This has been a great experience for all of us. That said, we hope you all understand that there will be no classes the next week while Mikey and I are in Florida for R-Awakening."
There were a few groans, but most of the class seemed to understand.
"As we announced late last week, classes would also end early today as my wonderful friend here has been chosen to be the first plus sized cover model for GQ Magazine and they want to do the shoot here."
A hand quickly shot up.
"Wasn't Jonah Hill the first overweight man on the cover?"
"Actually Mr. Hill lost that title once his weight began to constantly flux."
The voice from the back of the room answered before Matt or I could. It was the director of the shoot.
"Well looks like that is gonna wrap things up today. Just remember that Matt and I don't actually fly out until tomorrow so if you guys have any questions for us before the week off, feel free to call or text. Otherwise enjoy the week. If you are one of the lucky students who we have arranged a local booking for, the details will be in your email. Thank you all again for sticking with us through the early hiccups."
The students all stood and made small talk. We told they they were welcome to stick around to watch the shoot if they wished. I walked to grab a snack while Matt helped clear some space for the shoot.
I grabbed a burrito, but the director slapped it from my hand.
"What are you doing? You have to look fit for this shoot!"
I looked at her confused.
"I thought the whole point of me being on the cover is to promote body positivity right? Like you wanted a plus sized man, you picked me because I am plus sized and successful and want to show size shouldn't hold you back right? So why does it matter if I eat a burrito? I literally have burritos and tacos to thank for like, half of my fame."
"No, we don't give a shit about any of that. We just want to get a fat guy on the cover up try to one up Cosmo after they put Tess Holliday on their cover."
"I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that actually."
"You already signed the contract, you are locked into this. If you don't follow through, we can sue you and your employer for breach of contract."
I let out a sigh and hung my head. Alright, just give me a few minutes to prep for this mentally.
I felt conflicted. I had made most of my career on the fact that I was heavy, but still a good athlete. Was I the fastest guy on the roster? No. But few guys could out muscle me and despite my size I was deceptively quick. My entire childhood, I felt like my size held me back, but once I got to the world of WZCW, I felt like my size worked in my favor. I wanted people to know that no matter your size or shape or color that you should never let it hold you back. I wasn't comfortable simply being used as a marketing scheme. I had no choice though. I was contractually obligated.
We went through with the shoot. I did my best, though my heart wasn't in it. I'd done cereal commercials, game commercials, voice over work, all the promo shoots for WZCW, but this was different. This had no heart.
When the shoot was finished I slumped against a nearby wall.
"
What's going on man?"
I didn't bother to look up at Matt.
"
So it turns out this shoot isn't about body positivity, its just about trying to one up Cosmo and piggyback off their plus sized model controversy. I thought this was gonna make a difference, turns out it's all just a ploy to increase sales and get eyes on the product."
"
Since when are you afraid of free corporate promotion? You literally named us after the Taco Bell slogan."
"
It's different. I love Taco Bell. I don't love being made to feel ashamed of who I am or ashamed of my size."
"
Dude, you are almost four Callies. Do you know what sort of advantage that is going to give you in that cage? When you enter that cage, its like a jungle, and when you rumble in that jungle their ain't no room for the civilized. You have to get in there and throw that weight around to make sure you survive. Bring home another title to Kick Ass Academia. Look at those kids, they look up to us. You can't let one corporate bitch ruin your outlook. Look where I was when you came along. Fuck. Look at your entire career. You overcome all the bullshit. You see the good in everyone. Even if it is buried deep down, you dig and dig until you find it, then you use that big back and giant shoulders to lug that shit back to the surface. You bring us out of the dark. You did it with damn near everyone you have come across, and I know you tried with Callie. And I know you aren't gonna quit trying. So for now, just swallow this shit, use it as motivation. Get some revenge for her kicking you in the dick on live TV, and take her fucking title! I know you want to bring the good out of her, but honestly she is gonna need to be torn down before you find that good."
I looked up, but I wasn't exactly feeling what Matt had to say.
"
I don't know man. I look at Callie, and I see a lot of myself. Those people she surrounds herself with, they are just hanging on for the ride. I've been there. I still am in some ways. Those people, they are gonna leave her when times get tough. You know me man, that ring, that is my home. There are seven billion people here with us floating around the sun, and I've never felt like any of them or the world we float on makes much sense. You put me in that twenty by twenty square though, and the world just clicks for me. All those wins, all those accolades, the titles, this Hall of Fame ring, I'd give it all back if it just meant I could live a normal life, to live with a quiet mind, to get back all the things I lost in pursuit of this. That's why I want to change her, to make her see that good inside her. Because one day, those people will leave. And those titles, those accolades, they aren't going to feel that void she will feel."
"
Well why don't you feel her void another way. I know you Mikey, I know it has crossed your mind."
I just shook my head at him.
"
It actually hasn't once. I'm gonna tell you a secret, never shared this with anyone. Growing up, when we were asked what we wanted to be when we grew up, all the other kids had a ton of answers. A baseball player. A cop. A doctor. A chef. You name it. My answer, my answer was to be in love. I was always told that wasn't the point of the question, but my whole life I wanted to be in love. I had that once, before my career really took off. Then as I got more and more successful, more and more time went into this, and it drove us apart. Since that day, I've been trying to fill that hole in my heart. All the titles, the endorsements, the money, the accolades, they don't come close. All the groupies and ring rats, still nothing. I'm happier here with you and Grandpa than I had been in years, but it still isn't the same. Since I got here though, there was been one girl that I feel weird around. I get those butterflies when I see her. I just want....."
"
You're talking about Katherine aren't you?"
I shot a look at him.
"
How did you know?"
"
Dude, I'm kinda of dumb, but I'm not oblivious or blind. I've seen the way you look at her. How you rush to give her extra attention in class. How you go easy on her in the ring, like you are afraid to hurt her. How you are afraid to touch her anywhere she might object to. I figured it out pretty quickly. Plus you are the only two white people here. Seems kinda like it was bound to happen."
He was right. I just sort of nodded my head at her.
"
I don't know what to do about it though. So I just sorta live with the feelings and don't act on them."
"
You don't know what to do? The man who urges people to Live Mas doesn't know what to do? Dude, just take a chance! You are fucking great. Worst that happens is she says no, but believe me hermano, she won't."
I gave a small laugh at him.
"
You know this is why people question our sexuality right?"
Matt just shrugged.
"
Well that and we shower together."
"
That was a one time occurrence!"
"
Eh, it will happen again one day. But look at her over there. You think people have never given her shit about her look? She's whiter than you, she is covered in tattoos. She has gauges and piercings. She carries herself with a confidence I've rarely seen though. I've seen that same confidence in you."
I stood and pulled Matt in for a hug.
"
Thanks. I appreciate you brother."
I walked over and stood on one of the trunks the camera crew had brought in for the shoot. I called the remaining students, Katherine included, around me.
"
Before you all go, I have something I want to tell you. Remember these words.
'Illegitimi non carborundum'
It means don't let the bastards grind you down. Look at me. I am almost four hundred pounds. I look like I don't shower or shave. I'm messy and gross. My whole life I have been told I am too fat, too slow, too stupid, too ugly to succeed in the world. Despite my many flaws, I have found success. I have been to the mountain top. It took me a little longer than most, but I got there. I want you all to know, no matter what obstacle is put in front of you, that you can do it too. Don't let the world tell you what you can and can't do. The only limits places upon you should be the ones you put there yourself. I look out at you and I see the potential for greatness in all of you. Fuck what they tell you. I'm telling you today, the fat and skinny. The young and old. The ugly and beautiful (I made sure to smile at Katherine as I said this). Black or white...or in the case of most of you, brown. You can all do it if you set your heart to it. Fuck anyone who tells you different. I am proof that you can do it. So over the next week, remember those three words, and tell anyone who tries to get you down to eat a bag of dicks."
I hopped down and made my way out to my car. If I had a mic I would have dropped it before I got down.
THE NEXT DAY
Matt and I were in San Juan to catch our flight out of Luis Muñoz Marín International Airport to fly to Florida. A Pitbull song was playing on a nearby radio and Matt was grumpy.
"
I'm telling you, all his music is the same. It's awful. I hate him."
"
So forgive my ignorance on this, but how come he gets to say the n-word?"
He just looked at me puzzled.
"
Okay so black people get to say it, I get that. Pitbull is Cuban though. Fat Joe says it though and he isn't black, he is Puerto Rican. Same with Big Pun back in the day. DJ Khalid is Palestinian and says it. I just wanna know where the line is drawn. Like I've lived in Puerto Rico a few months now, so do I get the n-pass?"
"
You should probably just drop this."
"
Look dude I'm curious. It just seems like a good filler word. I listen to a lot of rap, and sometimes I am singing along and I have to ask myself if its okay for me to say it. What if I don't use the hard 'r' version? Maybe I could just...."
I just cut off by my phone ringing.
"
Hello?"
"
Mr. Stormrage, we are sending you a preview of your cover for the upcoming GQ. Please check your email and confirm you have received it."
I pulled up my email app and told her it was in my inbox and she promptly hung up. I opened it and showed Matt.
"
You think they would have used a better photo. Plus who did the text headings? It looks like a cheap online program."
I shrugged my shoulders.
"
You still worried about Callie?"
I shook my head.
"
Nah. I thought about it last night. To fight the abyss, one must know it. Callie and I are two sides of the same coin. In a different life, we could have been best friends."
"
The abyss? Aren't you making this way deeper than it needs to be."
"
Nah. Plus abyss sounds like a bitch and Callie is a bitch so I'm rolling with it."
Matt laughed a little as he put his bag through the x-ray machine. I hated dealing with TSA, but as anyone who watched my last cage match will know, this TSA wasn't the biggest pain in the ass TSA had ever been for me.