S.H.I.T awoke.
If it could be called awakening.
Supposedly there must be a stream of consciousness there, so awakening could be the correct word.
Whatever it was that happened, S.H.I.T wasnt, and then was.
It was greeted by a bright white light, blinding it to all else temporarily, when that cleared it had a fine view of a ceiling, using its powers of deduction it still had not a clue where it was. We would perhaps recognise it as a ceiling from a Car Workshop or Manufacturing Workshop. As its hearing slowly returned, it could make out muffled sounds and voices.
~ Beep Beep ~
. . . So glad we finally got him out of that Hospital. . .
~ Beep Beep ~
. . . Shouldve known hed be completely unresponsive once his costume had been removed. . .
Things gradually become more coherent as S.H.I.T is able to pick up even more of the conversation.
~ Beep Beep ~
". . . Mostly damage to the exterior, shall we say 'armour?' We were lucky. . ."
~ Beep Beep ~
". . . Quick thinking with the flack jacket. . ."
~ Beep Beep ~
". . . You said he also used it to save the other one. . ."
~ Beep Beep ~
". . . Yes, somewhat unusual. . ."
~ BEEP BEEP ~
What is that beeping?
~ BEEP BEEP ~
My alarm, I am late for dinner with Mother.
A clicking sound indicates that the previously mentioned alarm has now been shut off, as would the fact that the beeping has completely stopped.
Its the third time youve been late this week, said a voice, Female and playfully chastising.
I know, I know, but I dare not leave him here alone. Said the other voice, Male and somewhat weary. That is where you come in, sorry.
The Female sighed audibly, though not without a hint of humour. You know, a Girl cant have much of a life when shes babysitting a Cardboard Box.
I know," the man replied. "I am sorry, but this thing, this man can't be left alone. . .
The voice trailed off as S.H.I.T lapsed back into what can only be called unconsciousness.
S.H.I.T awoke again, this time with a visible start. The flash of light much briefer this time, allowing it once again to have an unparalleled view of the ceiling above it.
Ah, he is awake at last. Said the familiar voice of the man. Calmly.
Did you see the way that thing shook? Said the Woman, sounding nowhere near as calm as her counterpart.
Yesss! He said almost fiendishly, there is strength in him yet.
S.H.I.Ts excellent view of the ceiling was spoilt by the arrival of two Humans filling its vision, both looking down on it but out of focus as S.H.I.Ts vision accustoms itself to the sudden change after the severe beatings it has undergone. The Machine tries to speak, but finds itself unable to.
You will find yourself unable to speak for the moment, my old friend, said the unfocused visage that mustve been the man. That is because I have no interest in engaging you in prolonged discourse concerning the complete annihilation of the Human race. Nod your head if you understand.
The Machine, if anything put out by not being allowed to rant about the Human races clear inferiority nods its head in the affirmative.
Theres a good boy, said the man, patting S.H.I.T on the head. Then, just as they were coming into focus, both figures disappear from its view.
Should you be speaking to it like thaaat? Hissed the Female voice.
The man laughed it off, this thing, this person has put me through too much over the last year or so for me to care about consequences anymore. If being condescending occasionally is the only revenge I can take, then believe me, Ill take it, Ill take it hard.
As S.H.I.T listens to it being discussed by the unknown pair, the workbench it had been lying on started to move beneath it, until eventually S.H.I.T is stood upright, an effort to move confirmed that it had indeed been chained down.
For as much your safety as it is ours, my old friend." He said, indicating the chains. "We cant have you rampaging through the streets as you wouldnt last five minutes out there. No, I am afraid that for the moment at least, youll have to trust me.
S.H.I.T stared at the stupidly smiling man, who was non-descript. That isnt essentially true, he was very easy to descript, he is wearing a long white lab coat, has wild white hair, a huge white moustache, a large pair of thick black glasses and appears to still be wearing his slippers, a pair of fluffy little bunnies. None of that mattered, because none of that was the man, only what the man was pretending to be. Why should S.H.I.T trust this man, who was clearly an imposter and got some kind of sick, human joy from wearing dead animals on his feet? It could almost regret not being able to verbalise that thought. On the other hand, he was familiar.
It changed its attention to the Human Female, she at least was genuine, and petite, even for a Human. Currently she is watching S.H.I.T while sitting on another workbench with her feet hunched up under her chin, staring even, into its eyes. S.H.I.T stares back, and the Human clearly isnt comfortable with what she sees, shuddering slightly and looking away. Not unusual, but slightly sad.
The man, having clearly noticed none of the previous exchange because he was busy doing some, and S.H.I.T could see this immediately, idiotic and completely wrong calculations on a blackboard, turns and beams at Woman and Machine.
And now, I think its time you went back to sleep old friend.
With that S.H.I.T lapsed into unconsciousness once more.
Yet again S.H.I.T awakens, this time with no visible fuss, a quick scan of the room shows only one Human in it at this point, the scientist man scribbling still on the blackboard, correction, another blackboard, he has four lined up now and has filled them all with nonsense so far as S.H.I.T could tell. S.H.I.T wondered if it was worth the effort in trying to speak.
"Your calculations are pathetic, nonsensical and wrong!"
The man jumped, but not too much and turned to face the Machine. S.H.I.T couldn't help but notice that his skin was paler and dark lines were forming under his eyes.
"I'll ignore that statement," he said, somehow lacking a trace of his former calmness, he reached out and picked up a cup of coffee. "Welcome back to the land of the living, again."
"Why am I in this place?"
The man's thick, black eyebrows raise at this. "Referring to yourself in the first person? I never thought I'd see the day." He sips his coffee while the Machine looks on, with its red, but somehow cold eyes, "you are here because nowhere else is safe for you right now. Believe me when I tell you, I am the only chance you have of returning to a WZCW ring alive." He takes another mouthful of coffee.
S.H.I.T looks down at the floor. "I do not wish to return to WZCW." It is important to note that the voice is as cold and emotionless as ever.
The traditional, perhaps cliche thing to do would be to spit out the coffee, clearly this man was above such trite theatrics, he just swallowed his coffee and nodded slightly.
"And why is this?"
"I have, achieved my goal. . . I have reached maximum output. . . I have faced the best, the most brutal, and I have peaked."
At that moment a door at the far end of the room opened, and the Female from before entered overloaded with shopping bags, the man looks to where she is struggling with her bags. "Stay here." He says to the chained up Robot, before rushing over to the Woman.
"Oh good, help me with these bags will you," she said and held out a bag for the man to take.
"It would seem we have a problem," said the man, letting the bag fall to the floor.
She looks up at him, "my brother, actually admitting there's a problem?" She said with her hands on her hips, with a faint smile, "this thing really has taken you to the cleaners."
"It doesn't want to go back!" He said grabbing her by the arms.
"Well, that's good isn't it? You've been trying to get that thing out of WZCW for a long time."
"That was before!" He said, sounding frantic now.
"Before what?"
"Before I found out what he really is!" He said, shaking her despite her protests. "Don't you see, he's a failed expirement! The only reason he's allowed to carry on existing is because he is in the public eye! They are just waiting for him to go!" He released his grip, "they nearly got him once before, Barbosa had nearly driven him out of the company, I had to resort to pretending to be Lance Armstrong to push him back in."
The Woman takes a step back. "I think you've been playing the role of scientist for too long, look at you, get some sunlight."
He grabs her arm and pulls her over to where S.H.I.T is still chained down.
Tell her, tell her why you do not wish to compete anymore." He demanded.
"I have, achieved my goal. . . I have reached maximum output. . . I have faced the best, the most brutal, and I have peaked."
She looks from the Scientist, to the Machine and back to the Scientist. "Your point?"
"Don't you see!" He almost shouted, "this is what happens you you introduce a Human's fears into something that doesn't feel fear."
"What?"
"The fear of failure!" He shouted, "as a Human he was obsessed with being the strongest, the fastest, the most dangerous, he was afraid of failure, that's why he underwent this transformation, to remove fear and weakness, but now he is realising his fear of failure! He's becoming Human again!"
"Are you saying he allowed himself to be brainwashed by a weapons company and dressed up in cardboard so that he would be the best?"
"No, the transformation was never supposed to go that far, it was only to remove fear and other things percieved as weakness, instead it wiped everything, someone, somewhere thought it would be a good idea to dress him in cardboard, convince him he's a robot and have him wrestle. Presumably it was a marketing ploy, let us brainwash all your soldiers, they'll all be unstoppable killing machines." He said, mimicking the cheesy voices usually used on adverts.
"But the project was illegal and got shut down, he is the last remaining proof that it ever existed, well, he and I and now you. . . I should never have involved you and Mother. I am sorry, now we are all in danger.
"So, give this guy back to them and tell them you'll keep quiet," She said calmly, "you said he was a piece of shit before he underwent the therapy, no pun intended, let them deal with him."
"I can't," he said.
"Why?"
"Don't you see, he is a clean slate." When it was clear that she did in fact, not see, he elaborates. "I've done many questionable things in the past in order to put food on the table. This was my chance to do something morally acceptable for once, I could use this monster of a man to punish the wrongdoers, one of which I was!" He almost hissed it at her.
"I am afraid I don't follow. Scratch that, I am afraid that I do." She said, backing away from the flying spittle.
"Yes, this is why we must destroy what remains of his Humanity. To save his life, to build a new, better person." He said, looking at the Machine, his eyes gleaming.
"Brother, you have the ability to play any role you want, but sometimes you get too deep into that role. You can't just use this thing to relieve you of your guilt for your past actions. Somewhere in there is a person, with a soul."
"He willingly destroyed that part of himself!" Came the retort, "only a few seconds ago you were saying we should leave him to whatever fate may await him."
Caught out, she had no reply, finally though she is able to muster a sentence. "You said other people have used this thing for their own ends."
"Ty Burna, Alhazred. Yes." He accepted.
"Would you be as bad as you claimed them to be?"
He looked at her, some semblance of sanity restored, "I am sorry, but you must see, it is the only way any of us will be safe, him, you, me, he must continue to compete, for that end I must, must make him that way again. It'll save all of our lives."
The Woman appears to think this over for a long time, before finally giving in. "Do what you have to do, but don't consider this a moral crusade." She said, turning toward the door and leaving. A more fitting thing to do would have been for her to have turned at the door and told the man that she loved him, but this didn't happen, if it would've changed anything, we'll never know, instead she just left.
"What do Lance Armstrong, Alex Bowen and Justin Cooper have in common?" He said to S.H.I.T, "they are all despicable people that will do whatever it takes to reach and stay at the top, and attempt to blow people up with C4, I know, I trained Lance Armstrong for two years, taught him everything he knows. But more importantly, they are all Human, they all fear what goes 'Bump' in the night.
He unfurls a golden stopwatch, and stands directly in front of S.H.I.T.
"You my friend, are that 'Bump'" Is the last thing that S.H.I.T hears before the watch starts swinging to and fro in front of its eyes.
---------- ---------------------------- ---------
S.H.I.T stomps around the backstage area, the words of the scientist man still ringing in its head, "how dare they, they've taken your award, Cooper and Bowen have taken your award!" S.H.I.T pushes a crew member out of it's way as it heads toward the changing rooms, "if Barbosa will sit and do nothing, then you at least must do something, reclaim it! Let them know that you are not to be trifled with!"
S.H.I.T kicks open the door to the changing room, the assembled wrestlers all look at the new entrant, S.H.I.T had never bothered with the changing room before, usually taking refuge in its storage crate until it was time to do something. It scanned the occupants of the room, not finding Cooper or Bowen it was about to leave before something caught its eye. It was itself, on television, as a possible candidate for "breakthrough star of the year."
The scientist seems to put a lot of stock in these awards, it will collect this one.
It's name is read out, it won. . . Breakthrough star of the year? It would give them a breakthrough, the curtain is right next to it, S.H.I.T will enter by a different route, taking a few steps back, it gets a running kick straight at the wall, making a hole big enough for itself to go through.
Breakthrough star of the year indeed.
-------- --------------------------- -----------
"Yes, it is ready to compete," The scientist is on the phone, complete with posh English accent, toying with the award S.H.I.T was able to claim, one eye twitching slightly. "Yes, we've been following the shows, trust me, we are practically next door. Meltdown? Chris K.O? Fabulous, it'll be there, I hope for Chris K.O's sake he isn't."
He looks at S.H.I.T.
S.H.I.T looks back.
This is a different location from last time, much smaller, with S.H.I.T's storage crate dominating the room. S.H.I.T is inside, chained up, with the man sitting in front of the opening having just closed his mobile phone. They are face to face.
"The White Knight!" He said simply.
"Chris K.O!" Was the reply.
"You saw what he did to Krypto." He stated, "he is a dangerous man."
"I am not Krypto!" Was the reply.
"No, you are not," he said, "you and Chris have a history, a violent one. Now though, he considers himself the White Knight, the man that stands against evil, an arrogant moniker, and inaccurate considering his recent actions, but he can call himself what he wishes. It doesn't matter at all, why is that?"
"I will destroy him!" Said the chained up Machine.
"The White Knight comes first," said the scientist, before turning and muttering, "still referring to himself in the first person." Shaking his head.
"Cooper and Bowen," he said louder, I was rash sending you in against them single handed." He turned back to face S.H.I.T. "I doubt you have heard the last of them, or Barbosa."
S.H.I.T's fists clench at the mention of that name.
"He provokes an angry reaction from you, but you did not have to save him from the C4. Why did you?" He asks the question, but the smile on his face would seem to indicate that he already knows the answer.
"He was not theirs to destroy!"
"Oh. . ." He said, anticipating what was coming next.
"He is mine to destroy!"
The scientist does what can only be described as a triumphant pirhouette.
"My friend you are only just beginning, Barbosa, Bowen and Cooper, with those three we shall see where the wind takes us. You have an immediate concern. A man that claims to be a hero but is instead merely a bully, but like all Human's, he fears what goes 'Bump' in the night."
S.H.I.T stares with its expression of muted hatred. The other man stands with his back to the Machine, arms outstretched.
"I exist only to destroy!"
"I exist only to destroy!"
Perhaps thinking the Machine was stuck on a loop the Scientist turns around and is about to speak.
"H.I exist only to destroy!
A faint smile forms on his face. It no longer refers to itself in the first person.
"H.I exist only to destroy!
H.I.T exists only to destroy!
"It's not alive," he mumbled, this is followed by a small thunderclap.
H.I.T exists only to destroy!
"IT'S NOT ALIVE!" He screamed at the heavens, answered by a huge roar of thunder.
S.H.I.T exists only to destroy!
S.H.I.T exists only to destroy!
This repeated mantra, accompanied by the Scientists mad screams and the thunder merge together to create a symphony that Beethoven himself would've wept to have heard, had he not been deaf.
