It's a beautiful day in Chicago. Seventy degrees and sunny without a cloud in sight. In the clearing behind Sal's Pizza, Wasabi Toyota is relaxing in his usual hang out spot, wearing his customary outfit of nothing. He takes small sips from his extra large caramel macchiato while swaying gently on his extremely comfortable hammock made of zebra fur, a special gift from his tag team partner. Toyota picks up his ever trusty tape recorder from the table to his left, and begins to speak.
Hello to all beings, human or otherwise, that may be listening to the Toyota Memoirs, Version 4.0. WZCW World Tag Team Champion Wasabi Toyota here yet again to spread my thoughts and insight on things such as life, wrestling, and love, as far and as wide as possible. Let the joy and sensuality sweep over you.
Toyota smiles widely, his face the epitome of pleasure, before finishing off his macchiato in one final chug.
A lot of people have been concerned about my attitude over the last few days. They wondered how I could be so happy and jubilant after suffering what some considered an embarrassing defeat to the Mighty Mite known as Tucker Grahmn. Normally I would be one to take something like a loss pretty hard. I'd throw a tantrum, overindulge on some ice cream and being in a generally foul and depressed mood. But that's not what happened this week.
The loss the Grahmn made me realize something - I can't be perfect and certainly shouldn't try to be. Despite my loss, the world didn't cave in. Hunter and I are still champions and I still have a chance to make a difference in this world. I can still fulfill my journey, the bumps and setbacks along the way are just part of the ride. It just feel so great that I can make a difference, that I can be the change I want to see in the world. Isn't life wonderful? I love it, man. I LOVE IT! Sure, I may sound like I'm doing nothing more in speaking in clichés, but it's the truth. I really believe this, I truly do.
Toyota starts to well up as emotion overcomes him. He pauses for a moment to wipe his eyes with the nearest tree leaf.
The one thing I do regret from last week is that by letting Grahmn defeat me, he'll continue to believe that he's right in his ways of disarray and debauchery. The longer he believes he can do whatever he wants and tells others the same, the worse off this world is. I may not be able to teach Grahmn his lesson this week, but I assure you'll, we'll meet again down the road, and vengeance will be served!
Toyota snaps a conveniently placed broom handle in half with ease before tossing it to the side. The anger in the air is palpable.
Thankfully, I'm able to get right back in the ring this week against Doug Crashin. Now most people in the company see Crashin as nothing more than a joke, a court jester, the village idiot, the autistic kid who sits in the back on the room and eats crayons. They assume victory before stepping foot in the ring. I could easily do the same, especially considering Hunter and I have already pinned Dougy in the past. However, I'm certainly not going to do that.
If there's one thing I got out of my loss last week, other than all that mumbo jumbo I've already been over, it's not to be overconfident. I was sure I could just waltz into the ring and put Grahmn down for the count in a matter of minutes. Obviously, that wasn't the case. At this point in my career, I have to work for every victory, especially in matches without Hunter on my side. I'm just not skilled or experienced enough yet, even against someone as low on the totem pole as Crashin, to get a victory without putting in the work.
Rocco and I have been going at it extra hard in the gym the last few days, Hunter and I have had some intense dance sessions and we've watched a ton of tape on Crashin, especially of the match where Hunter beat him awhile back. I feel like I couldn't have done any more to prepare this week, which is something I definitely couldn't have said before my last match. I'm in tip top shape.
Toyota takes a moment to thoroughly rub his belly before continuing.
Not only am I in top physical condition, but I'm in top mental condition as well. As I said before, I'm not underestimating Doug in the ring. He's a capable competitor. But as a person, he's god awful. He's cocky, arrogant, flaunts around his wealth, and claims to be a "savior" while hiding what is surely nothing more than a scam to add to his already superfluous wealth.
Of all the opponents I've faced during my time in this great company, I don't think any have been more corrupt, more rotten, or more deserving of a beating than Mr. Crashin. For some reason, he didn't learn his lesson after the last time we faced off. I guess this time I'll have to come at his even harder and faster before I'm able to pound him into submission and finally change his ways for the better of himself and all that surround him.
Once that bell rings, he better be ready, because once Toyota starts, he can't stop.
Toyota sets down his recorder and closes his eyes, falling into a deep sleep while his bare skin rests on the softest zebra fur in the world.
