klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
With this very annoying royal wedding coming up, you hear this term a lot. I was reading Lucy her bedtime story ("Since Mama won't do it!") and something occurred to me: this wedding is NOTHING like a fairy tale. Let's take a look at some popular and well known fairy tales and see what we find in them. In this case I checked a list of Disney movies made from fairy tales since they've covered just about everything in this genre.
Snow White:
Poison, woodsmen, dwarves, indentured servitude, presumed death, mining, wicked queen
Cinderella:
Child abuse, implied slavery, talking mice, pumpkins, and in the original story, self mutilation
Sleeping Beauty:
Dragons, more near death, jealousy, bitterness, blood, big freaking towers and thorns all around it
Rapunzel (Tangled):
Isolationism, imprisonment, hundred of feet of hair, female baldness, blindness, a big tower, witchcraft
A few others:
Rumpelstiltskin:
Child theft, human trafficking, selling children, games of chance, guessing a name like a carnival barker
Hanzel and Gretel:
Child poverty, murder, houses made of candy, SHOVING AN OLD LADY INTO AN OVEN
An overarching theme of the ones ending in weddings: the princes have known the girls either not at all (love at first sight) or have known them like 6 hours. Now, my question:
HOW IN THE WORLD IS THE ROYAL WEDDING ANYTHING LIKE ANY OF THESE STORIES???????? Fairy tales are straight MESSED UP stories with someone dying in almost every well known one. The marriages are based on infatuation or the thought of "I love her even though I've never talked to her", which can be translated to "Dang she's hot and I want to screw her brains out". These two met in college and have dated almost ten years. This is like a bad romantic comedy, not a fairy tale.
Snow White:
Poison, woodsmen, dwarves, indentured servitude, presumed death, mining, wicked queen
Cinderella:
Child abuse, implied slavery, talking mice, pumpkins, and in the original story, self mutilation
Sleeping Beauty:
Dragons, more near death, jealousy, bitterness, blood, big freaking towers and thorns all around it
Rapunzel (Tangled):
Isolationism, imprisonment, hundred of feet of hair, female baldness, blindness, a big tower, witchcraft
A few others:
Rumpelstiltskin:
Child theft, human trafficking, selling children, games of chance, guessing a name like a carnival barker
Hanzel and Gretel:
Child poverty, murder, houses made of candy, SHOVING AN OLD LADY INTO AN OVEN
An overarching theme of the ones ending in weddings: the princes have known the girls either not at all (love at first sight) or have known them like 6 hours. Now, my question:
HOW IN THE WORLD IS THE ROYAL WEDDING ANYTHING LIKE ANY OF THESE STORIES???????? Fairy tales are straight MESSED UP stories with someone dying in almost every well known one. The marriages are based on infatuation or the thought of "I love her even though I've never talked to her", which can be translated to "Dang she's hot and I want to screw her brains out". These two met in college and have dated almost ten years. This is like a bad romantic comedy, not a fairy tale.
