Carnival of Anarchy Wrestling - Onslaught

[Klown_Karnage]

Carnival of Anarchy Wrestling​

Roll up, roll up, right this way. We know what you’re all here to see. Stuff the crap about skill, art, and flawless execution. You, dear fans, are here to see freaks, mutants, weirdos and reprobates beat the ever-lovin’ hell out of each other. Well, we at CAW are happy to provide here in our little circus of violence. So get your seat and get ready for something you won’t get anywhere else.

Backstory

Shortly after being fired from TNA, Mick Foley had a severe mental breakdown. His multiple personality disorder returned with a vengeance, bringing with it unpredictable lapses into Mankind and even Dude Love. After checking himself into a mental institution for a while, Foley formed the basis for his own wrestling promotion. He would take professional wrestling and turn it into not only what the fans wanted, but what he wanted. He would take from the Roman gladiatorial traditions as well as from the traditions of the carnival/circus and create the greatest show on earth. He could do it. No shriveled up old has-beens holding him back and political correctness be damned! After leaving the asylum, Foley used a combination of careful planning and reckless audacity to entice the sort of wrestlers he wanted. He didn’t get everyone he wanted, perhaps, but he got enough…and there was time. Sooner or later those he wanted would become disillusioned with their respective promotions and then…he’d have them. But for now, on with the show!

Weekly Episodic Show: CAW - Onslaught
Theme Music: White Trash Circus by Motley Crue (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D96vh4Sx_NU)

Roster/Staff (F for Face, H for Heel, T for Tweener)
Note: This is always subject to change as the show progresses.

Owner/Chairman: Mick Foley (F)

General Manager of Onslaught: William Regal (H)

Announce Team: Matt Stryker (H), Santino Marella (F)

Ring Announcer: Lillian Garcia

Main Event
The Undertaker (T)
Jeff Hardy (F)
The Big Show (F)
CM Punk (H)
Sting (H)
Abyss (T)
Edge (H)
Booker T (H)
Rey Mysterio (F)
RVD (F)

Mid Card
Matt “Hardcore” Hardy (H) (Repackaged. More on that later.)
Kane (H)
The Great Khali (F)
Hornswoggle (F)
Luke Gallows (H)
Goldust (H)
Dolph Ziggler (H)
Evan Bourne (F)
John Morrison (F)
R-Truth (F)
Mark Henry (F)
The Boogyman (T)

Furies (Female Division)
Beth Phoenix (F)
Mickie James (F)
Rosie Lottalove (F)
The Awesome Kong (T)
ODB (T)
Maryse (H)
Jillian “Hellcat” Hall (H) (Repackaged. More on that later.)
Melina (F)
Serena (H)
Tiffany Payne (F)
Angelina Love (H)
Velvet Sky (H)

Others
Dr Stevie (H)
Doink the Clown (H)

Tag-Teams/Stables
The Inmates (Abyss and Kane, Manager Dr. Stevie)
The Straight-Edge Society (CM Punk, Luke Gallows, and Serena)
Night and Day (Goldust and The Boogyman)
Air Raid (Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne)
Truth and Wisdom (R-Truth and John Morrison)
The Beautiful People (Angelina Love and Velvet Sky)
Triple B/Big, Beautiful, and Badass (Beth Phoenix, The Awesome Kong and Rosie Lottalove)

Championships
CAW World Heavyweight Championship – Vacant
CAW Anarchy Division Championship – Vacant
CAW Tag-Team Championship – Truth and Wisdom
CAW Furies Championship – Vacant
CAW Furies Tag-Team Championship – Vacant
CAW Slapstick Heavyweight Championship (Unofficial) – Vacant

 

[future admin]

I enjoy the backstory to your promotion, it is really smart and works well. Now, I think that the roster is a great size. the tag team division is one fine division, I like the names and tag teams you have come up with. To wrap up my post, I'm just going to wish you good luck for your Book This. It seems really good right now

 

[Klown_Karnage]

CAW – Episode One​

Bring on the opening music and pyro. The crowd is here, they’re hot, they’re ready for a show. Old on tight, ‘cause here it comes!

STRYKER​

Welcome to the Carnival of Anarchy, fans and welcome to Onslaught! I’m Matt Stryker.

MARELLA​

And I am your very own Italian Stallion, Santino Marella. And hang onto your pants because we have an avalanche of awesome coming on you.

STRYKER​

Uh…yeah, might wanna rephrase that. Anyways, we’ve got five vacant championships and our chairman, Mick Foley, has assured us that one way or another they will all be around the waist of somebody by the end of tonight. Already ahead tonight the new Anarchy Division Championship will be decided with an eight-man ladder match.

MARELLA​

And the main event tonight, the CAW World Heavyweight Championship will go to the last survivor standing in a Gauntlet Elimination match!

STRYKER​

Right, we start off with two competitors. When one of them wins, he will face the next and so on until the last winner is crowned. All of that is coming up tonight.

(The music of William Regal hits as his video package is shown on the new Foley-Tron. Here comes Regal in a suit and tie.)

MARELLA​

And welcome the most boring man in existence, William Regal!

STRYKER​

Hey, that’s no way to talk about our General Manager.

(William Regal steps forward and addresses the crowd. Lots and lots of booing.)

REGAL​

For those of you ignoramuses who don’t know already, I am General Manager William Regal and due to a recent ceremony in my home country, you may now refer to me as Sir William Regal. One may ask why a man of such impeccable breeding and flawless good taste would associate himself with such a disgraceful collection of ingrates and hooligans such as those in the locker room and you in the stands. The truth is that I am the only hope this show has of success. Total anarchy can only lead to total collapse and there is but one man with the experience and strength to keep these lunatics in line. That person is…

(Regal’s speech is cut off by Mick Foley’s music. Foley enters to a big pop. He raises his barbed wire bat as he clomps down to the ring and gets in to stand across from Regal.)

FOLEY​

Willy, come on. When I gave you your job description, I didn’t say come out to the ring and bore the fans into a coma. I hired you because I wanted someone to handle the boring stuff so I could concentrate on the fun parts like giving these people what they want to see. And, sorry buddy, that isn’t you standing around lecturing. They came to see some violence! So why don’t you go back to your office and let’s bring out my old playmate!

(As if on cue, Kane’s pyro goes off and it looks as if we’re ready to start off with an opening match.)

Match #1: Kane vs. Evan Bourne

Kane enters lead by Dr. Stevie. His costume has changed a bit. He is currently wearing red asylum inmate kit. It should be noted that he is also wearing chain restraints and Dr. Stevie has a couple of keys hanging on his neck. After Kane is in the ring, Dr. Stevie removes the restraints and Kane makes fire jet from the ring posts. Evan Bourne is out next to a good deal of cheers. And the match is on. It begins with a stare-down, Evan moving and Kane staring at him, approaching slowly. Kane swipes, Evan dodges, trying to take him down with kicks to the legs. Kane retaliates with a hard uppercut that knocks Evan to the ground. Kane has a devil of a time catching him, though. Evan keeps moving, striking, and eventually clotheslines Kane’s legs to get him to his knees and delivers a dropkick to the head. Another attempted strike but Kane strikes Evan down as he rises and the tide turns. A bodyslam followed by a dropkick to Evan’s face and a cover is made. Bourne kicks out. Kane begins to dominate with Stevie shouting orders. It looks like the beginning of the end for Bourne as Kane begins to climb to the top rope. However, Bourne dodges the flying clothesline, striking Kane’s legs again with kicks, working the left leg particularly, and finally knocking him down with a flying spin-kick. Kane catches Bourne by the neck and it looks like the end when a distorted female voice comes over the speakers and a blurred image on the Foley-Tron.

VOICE​

I’m watching you, Kane. I’m always watching you, and I will have you.


Kane looks with confusion at the Foley-Tron, allowing Bourne to take advantage with a high knee to the temple. Bourne hits the Shooting-Star Press and makes the cover. 1, 2, 3. Bell rings, it’s over.

Winner: Evan Bourne

Bourne manages to escape before Stevie can catch him and before Kane sits up suddenly in a rage. He glares at Bourne’s retreating form and keeps looking to the Foley-Tron as his anger builds. It takes quite a bit of coaxing from Dr. Stevie to get Kane back into his restraints and out of the ring.

Backstage Segment #1: The Beautiful People, Maryse, Tiffany Payne, Hornswoggle

Backstage, the door to the women’s locker room gets the camera’s focus as there’s sudden screaming from within. The door opens to allow Hornswoggle to exit, cackling maniacally and carrying Maryse’s ring gear. Maryse (soaking wet and wearing a towel) accompanied by TBP, chase Hornswoggle down the hall, losing him around a corner. The three of them search for him, complaining about getting stuck in this freak show. Just down the hall, Tiffany Payne (an acquisition from the Micro Wrestling Federation) sees them coming around the hall.

SKY​

Alright, you little freak, where’s that other little freak?!

PAYNE​

Freak, huh? That because I’m the only one here with a pair of real tits? Anyways, what freak are you trying to find.

LOVE​

That midget that thinks he’s a leprechaun! Hornswoggle.

PAYNE​

Mighta seen him. Why?

MARYSE​

That little…creature stole my clothing!

PAYNE​

Really? And just how did he get you naked in the first place?

More arguing until finally Payne directs them down the hall. TBP insult her further and threaten her with the ugly stick before moving on. Payne shrugs it off, referring to them as The Bimbo People once they’ve left. Then she bangs on a nearby box, telling Hornswoggle the coast is clear. She then takes the ring gear and goes to put it back in Maryse’s locker as if it had never been removed.

PAYNE​

If all the other Furies are this stupid, this is gonna be a fun ride.

To Be Continued...

 

[Klown_Karnage]

CAW - Episode One (Part 2)​

Match #2: CAW Tag-Team Championship Triple Threat. The Inmates vs. Night and Day vs. Truth and Wisdom

Apparently Kane is double-booked in back to back matches because he is soon joined by Abyss. He is also lead in wearing restraints and is also freed of them by a key around Dr. Stevie’s neck. Truth and Wisdom enter next to a big pop. They are followed by Night and Day. The match starts out with R-Truth and Abyss. R-Truth gets in a few shots before Abyss catches him and begins to beat him down. When Abyss bounces from the ropes to line up a clothesline, Goldust tags himself in. Abyss lunges for Goldust who drops suddenly, grabbing the top rope and sending Abyss toppling out of the ring. Goldust then approaches R-Truth to finish the job, but R-Truth rallys and begins to gain momentum. Truth tags in Morrison who starts really working Goldust over. Abyss then tags in, yanking Goldust bodily out of the ring so that he can return. Now it’s back and forth between Morrison and Abyss. Morrison hits Abyss with a flying chuck kick followed by a Moonlight Drive. The reeling Abyss manages to catch Morrison with a sidewalk slam before wandering to his corner. The still winded Kane is reaching for a tag, but Abyss refuses to tag him in. Kane, frustrated, waits until Abyss is in range and tags himself in. Abyss shoves Kane and this leads to a brawl between these two outside of the ring with Dr. Stevie screaming and hitting them both with his belt to get them to stop. The Boogyman takes advantage and hits the ring and John Morrison with several strikes followed by a two-handed chokeslam. Cover attempt which is broken up by R-Truth. Morrison follows up by attempting a small package on Boogyman which only gets a two-count. Morrison tags in R-Truth and Boogyman and Truth go back and forth. Goldust makes a blind tag on Boogyman just before Truth connects with the Lie Detector on Boogyman. However, Morrison made his own blind tag in, so when Goldust hits Truth with the Golden Age, Morrison is waiting to hit him with the old Nitro Blast superkick. This is followed up by Starship Pain and a pin. 1, 2, 3, and ring the bell.

Winners and First CAW Tag-Team Champions: Truth and Wisdom

Match #3: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

After suitable celebration, during which Night and Day slink away, Truth and Wisdom also leave the ring. CM Punk’s music hits and the Straight-Edge Society enters with chair and buzz-cutter. Punk has the mic and is getting a lot of heat.

PUNK​

Oh sure, I’d expect that from you people. I’ve heard the theme music. I’ve seen most of the kind of people in this company. Pathetic! Weak drug-fogged miserable people. I got here and I asked myself what the hell was I doing here? Still, like any other missionary, it is my duty, my privilege to save the shallow and weak people through the ways of straight-edge. Tonight I’m facing the charismatic enabler. I ridded the WWE of his terrible influence and I’ll do the same thing here. Then, after I beat and humiliate Jeff Hardy, I will induct a new member into the Straight-Edge Society, saving yet another and beginning my road to cleansing the…

(Punk’s speech is interrupted by Jeff Hardy’s music. He is accompanied to the ring by his brother Matt who looks to be in full support. Yep, it’s the Hardy Boyz back together again. )

JEFF​

Wake up, Punk! Nobody likes you, nobody wants you, nobody wants to hear you. So…I think we should give these people what they want.

Jeff smacks Punk in the face with the mic and the match starts. Punk starts in with strikes which are answered by ducks and dodges. Jeff turns the tide with a Whisper in the Wind. Attempt at a Twist of Fate is reversed, sending Jeff into the ropes. Punk follows with an attempted GTS which is reversed out of. Matt seems to be on Jeff’s side up to this point, however as Jeff is knocked half out of the ring, Matt gives him a face-full of steel chair. This allows Punk to hit the GTS and gain a quick victory.

Winner: CM Punk

Following the match, Punk gets a mic again.

PUNK​

Sorry, Jeff. I guess I forgot to tell you. The newest member of the Straight-Edge Society…is your own brother Matt Hardy. Matt, if you will step into the ring…

(Gallows and Serena wait with the buzz-cutter. Matt brings his chair and makes as if he’s going to set it up, but instead smashes Gallows in the face with it, following through with knocking both him and Punk out of the ring. Serena flees of her own accord. Matt Hardy laughs as he looms over both his brother and the SES.)

MATT​

You don’t get it, do you Punk? You, Jeff? None of you do. I didn’t sign on with Carnival of Anarchy to be anybody’s puppet. Not my brother’s, not the Straight-Edge Society’s, nobody’s! I’ve had enough pouring my blood, sweat and tears into someone else’s success. This time around is different. This time, I take what I want and I don’t care if I have to go through either of you to get it. You wanna stand on someone to make it to the top, stand on someone else. The story of Matt Hardy the also-ran is over. The legend of “Hardcore” Hardy begins now.

(“Hardcore” Hardy poses in the ring with the chair held high as he stares down his brother and the SES.)

To Be Continued...