Ascension 72

[Harthan]

[YOUTUBE]ny7NZPfl0l4[/YOUTUBE]​

Last night, The Irish luck joined on your journey. But tonight, lady luck is a fickle, cruel woman.

We see a dark forest, with the shadows of dead, rotting trees cast around, and the sound of rain pouring down. A hooded woman appears in the darkness; The only thing that can be seen of her face is a mischievous grin.

Hush, child, darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep, child.
Darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep​

James Howard has weathered many a great foe, in his conquest of the Eurasian Title. But tonight, a monster lurks, to drag James Howard asunder. Will James be able to hold the monster in front of him back... While keeping the monster behind him at bay?

The camera pans to James Howard, squaring off with the Beard, while Mikey Stormrage watches from the darkness.

And you won't understand
the cause of your grief,
but you'll always follow
the voices beneath. ​

Steven Kurtesy knows being chased by monsters, all too well. But lady luck has saw fit to drop a mystery man in front to him; a trickster, borne of deception. Can Steven Kurtesy find bring the truth, and shine the light upon this shadowy figure.

Steven Kurtesy looks down, and then up to the camera. A flash of light shows the masked face of Diabolos, hanging above Kurtesy's right shoulder, and the face of Dr. Zeus upon the left.

And you will expose
his puppeteer behavior,
for you are the proof
of how he betrayed
her loyalty.​

A valiant champion, who by skill and luck has made it through this leg of his journey unscathed. But with a burly woodsman, out for pride, and a lunatic, out for vengeance, can the valiant champion be outdone?

Matt Tastic puts on his Baez' mask, and watches gleefully as S.H.I.T. and Grizzly Bob share blows.

Hush, child, darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep, child.
Darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep.​

A former world champion, walking away from the ruins and remains of his conquest. But tonight, he faces an even darker foe; a riddler who asks a heavy fee; your immortal soul.

Drake Callahan walks triumphantly through the ring, and looks to the horizon to see Dr. Zeus, preparing his hospital bed.

My only son,
each day you grow older,
each moment I'm watching
my vengeance unfold.​

A conquering king and queen, facing many hardships in their kingdom. Can the throne regroup, to face the challenge of a hero, and his mystery partner?

Celeste Crimson and Steven Holmes look to a non-chalent Titus, who looks over his shoulder into the abyss, waiting for whomever may join his side.

Hush, child, darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep, child.
Darkness will rise from the deep,
and carry it down into sleep.​

Tonight, lady luck guides these warriors into battle. But how far will they last, within darkness?

The hooded woman in the forest flips her up, to reveal Celeste Crimson. She gives a coy smile, as the rain falls upon her.

Hush Child... Mother is here...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[YOUTUBE]_yuXWYz78Lg[/YOUTUBE]​

Booming pyro explodes in the O2 Arena, as the camera pans to rabid WZCW fans. One sign reads, "The King is dead... Long live the king...", and the explosions of the pyro subside.

Connor:Welcome everyone, to another exciting edition of Ascension! Cat Connor, here always with my partner, Jack Cohen. Jack, an action packed night here.

Cohen:Well, I can't wait until these peons here, all get a taste of true royalty, when our tag team champions destroy Titus, and whoever that mystery partner is.

Connor:Lot of speculation who that partner is tonight-

Cohen:Oh can it, you and I both know who it is. He tried this before with Magnitudinis, and I wouldn't be shocked to see Big Dave sticking his nose where it does not belong.

[YOUTUBE]1eMSEuAe1bg[/YOUTUBE]​

An entire brass orchestra makes their way out to the entranceway, to sound the arrival of some WZCW superstar.

Connor:Oh, what in the hell?

We see Steven Holmes and Celeste Crimson saunter out, looking as regal as ever. They wave to the crowd, who return the favor with thunderous boos.

Cohen:Haha, what did I tell you? Isn't this a most royal procession?

Connor:It's certainly fitting of the champions, I will give them that.

Steven Holmes has a microphone in hand, but can barely speak with the amount of jeering. Celeste seems offended by this, as Steven holds the microphone, refusing to speak until the crowd has gone silent.

Holmes:Typical, I must say. Typical for them to not understand royalty... And typical of them to act like such boorish hounds.

The crowd boos, as Steven Holmes smiles a glimmering smile.

Holmes:It is at this time, our greatest moment of triumph, that we return to you... Ingrates. Not just to take care of some tawdry trash... No... No...

The crowd continues to boo, and begins a chant.

You're a bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap* You're a bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap* You're a bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*

Celeste grabs the microphone from Steven, to speak the crowd.

Crimson:If you're to be so rude, we have no qualm in leaving this building, and taking our greatness, and your main event!

This elicits further boos, and the chant gets a little altered

You suck bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*You suck bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*You suck bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*You suck bellend! *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*

Holmes:My darling, please... I actually have further business, for all of these peons... But namely, for you. You see, in my ghastly trip to this place, I have realized... Why, it's not their faults.

A chorus of boos emerge.

Holmes:No, no, not at all. These people don't know better... They don't have anyone to tell them better. And so, I'd like to present upon you... A token of my esteem.

Holmes turns to the side, where a large box is concealed, with a curtain.

Holmes:Now!

The curtain and box are lifted by a wire, to reveal a royal throne. Celeste seems overwhelmed by this, and looks at the majestic throne. She approaches it with brevity... And a little bit on unease. She looks at it, and to Holmes.

Crimson:Why... It's lovely... But Steven, isn't it... Isn't it much?

Holmes:Celeste, my dear... These people deserve you, as their queen. And with this... Now, you may reside over them. Sit, Celeste, sit! Watch on, at your people!

The crowd boos heavily. Celeste approaches the steps, and looks on, with curiosity.

Holmes:Go on, my dear.

Celeste sits upon her throne, and Steven Holmes approaches the foot of the throne. He takes her hand in his, and bends down on one knee, kissing her hand. Celeste is looking out to the people, and their protests. Some are hurling items at her, and while never reaching her, she looks down. She looks to her people, unsure of what to make of all of this.

Holmes:God save my queen. And tonight... Tonight, God Bless that rogue Titus, and the foul vermin who thinks to team with him. For my queen and I... We will make short work of them. And then, it shall be my queen, who will give the finals orders... Off with their heads!

Rule Brittania can be heard playing, as Holmes rises from bent knee. Celeste looks around her, once more.

Cohen:Wasn't it beautiful? These people now have royalty they can be proud of!

Connor:I don't think these people want, nor need, royalty. What they came here for was WZCW action. And that's exactly what they'll get next, when the Beard faces James Howard. Don't go away, everyone!

 

[Harthan]

Anderson: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

[YOUTUBE]a_426RiwST8[/YOUTUBE]​

Introducing first, from Leeds, England, weighing 223 pounds, he is the WZCW EurAsian Champion, James Howard!

The crowd cheers their approval to Howard, though a few pockets of boos for the proud Englishman pop up from the pro Irish crowd. Howard slaps a few hands before he shadow boxes with a fan in the front row. As he rolls into the ring, he removes his jacket, revealing his gold. He holds it high to one last pop.

Connor: Howard, looking to pick up some momentum tonight going into Apocalypse, and a win over The Beard is never a bad thing.

Cohen: Can you imagine what's going on in his head Cat? His best friend has gone crazy, his is a few minutes away from taking on an absolute monster in the Beard, and at Apocalypse he will defend his belt just a stone's throw from his home town.

[YOUTUBE]qzdhBxqz6q0[/YOUTUBE]​

And his opponent, from Beard City, USA, weighing 285 pounds, accompanied by Ezekiel Hewitt, "The Manliest Man in Professional Wrestling" The Beard!

Hewitt appears on stage first to a stream of boos, before Beard makes his way on stage. He makes his way slowly to the ring and Hewitt walks behind him, hand on his back as if to guide him. He rolls into the ring and waits patiently in the corner, his back bearing the bruises from his battle at Total Mayhem just a short time ago.

Connor: I'll say it, I don't like that Ezekiel Hewitt. He has been nothing but a bad influence on Beard.

Cohen: You call him a bad influence, I call him a positive influence. In recent weeks has has scored a win over Titus, taken Howard's number one contender to the limit, and was the runner up in The Gold Rush Tournament. I see big things in the future for young Jasper.

Elizabeth Prince dons the stripes for this match as she calls for the bell. Immediately Beard rushes Howard. The big man unleashes a barrage of clubbing blows, backing the champ into the corner. The ref goes to calls for the break, but Howard fights back with shots to the body. He backs Beard up a few steps, but the big man proves to be too much. He connects with a headbutt that pushes Howard back to the corner. Beard throws his hip hard into Howard, then follows it up grabbing him and connecting with a belly to belly out of the corner. He stays on top for the pin...
.
.
One!
.
.
Two!
.
.
But Howard is able to kick out. Beard backs up long enough to get some words of encouragement from his confidant Ezekiel. As Howard stands he is able to catch a few jabs to the body of Beard, but the big man again takes control, this time with a stiff boot to the gut. With Howard doubled over Beard connects with a snap suplex. He forgoes a pin to hit a big legdrop. As Ezekiel claps on the outside, Beard paces around the ring.

Connor: Thus far it has been all Beard tonight, with power reigning over speed.

Cohen: And it looks like Ezekiel Hewitt wants it to be over, as he call is calling for Beard to end it.

Listening to his manager's orders, Beard pulls Howard from the center of the ring, closer to the turnbuckle. After he positions him, Beard steps onto the apron and climbs to the top. As the big man tries to stedy himself, Howard springs to life and using the top rope for leverage, connects with a kick square to the shaved side of Beard's head. Beard crotches himself as Howard takes a moment to catch his breath before climbing to the second turnbuckle. He softens Beard up with some punches before he steps onto the top rope. He hops and connects with a picture perfect hurricanrana!

Connor: What a move by Howard, that has got to be it!

Howard slowly but surely crawls and drapes an arm over...
.
.
One!
.
.
Two!
.
.
Thr-NO! Beard got a shoulder up at two and three quarters. Howard took too long making the cover.

Cohen: Credit to both men. To Howard for finding it in himself to pull that off and credit to Beard for kicking out.

Both men slowly crawl to their feet, with Howard getting there just a split second before Beard. Both men begin to trade blows back and forth. Beard with hard right hands, Howard with crisp shots to the body. Beard winds up for a big double axe handle, but Howard ducks and connects with a skull rattling kick to the head.

Connor: I think The Beard may have a concussion after that shot. Absolutely brutal on the part of Howard.

Howard calls for the end lifts Beard to his feet and sets up the Tenzan Choke.

[YOUTUBE]4urONwPHnp0[/YOUTUBE]​

Cohen: What the hell?

Connor: Is that?

Cohen: Indeed Cat. That is Mikey Stormrage at the top of the ramp as Strikeforce's music plays.

Howard releases the hold and stands at the ropes at Stormrage simply turns and walks away. As Howard turns around he walks into a giant boot to the face from Beard. He crumples to a heap and Beard makes the cover, and unseen by the ref, Ezekiel Hewitt is hold down Howard's legs...
.
.
One!
.
.
Two!
.
.
Three!

Here is your winner, The Beard!

Beard rolls out of the ring to share a hug with Hewitt before the two of them walk up the ramp as Howard pleads his case to the referee.

Connor: Well with a little assist from Mikey Stormrage and Ezekiel Hewitt, Beard has managed to pick up a big win over the EurAsian champion.

Cohen: Assist or not, Howard has lost headed into Apocalypse, and the man he is facing is coming off a huge win. It doesn't look good for Howard.

Mikey Stormrage charges to and slides into the ring from behind while Howard is still distracted by the referee. Stormrage whirls Howard around and picks him up, and he PLANTS HIM WITH THE GAME OVER! Stormrage stands tall one more time over Howard as the camera fades out.

 

[Harthan]

Backstage, Steven Kurtesy is storming past the entrance way. Backstage staff is trying to stop him, to talk reason into him. He pushes them all aside, as he marches towards Big Dave's office. He barges in, as Dave is on the phone. He fumes, as Dave looks up with wide eyes at his new walk in.

Kurtesy:I want Zeus at Apocalypse. And you're going to give him to me.

Dave puts down the phone, and looks to Steven.

Dave:Steven, I... I can't do that. I don't think it's a good idea, I-

Kurtesy:I didn't ask for your thoughts, I'm telling you to put me in a match with Dr. Zeus, at Apocalypse!

Dave:Steven, just... Just calm down for me, please? Listen, we have an open spot in King for a Day. Why don't I put you in that? You can have a chance at the WZCW Heavywe-

Kurtesy:Piss off; I don't care about that. I'll agree to his terms, I don't care. Ring of fire? Great. Draft a contract, and make Zeus and Kurtesy, right now!

Dave gets out of his office chair, and walks around his desk. He starts to speak very softly.

Dave:Steven... Steven, my job is on the line. I... I can't make your match. You saw what Banks said, he wants to crack down on Mayhem. Making you and Zeus in a ring of fire is begging to get fired. You want to explain to my family why I got fired, because of your match?

Kurtesy gets up really close to Big Dave, and looks him dead in the eye.

Kurtesy:You want to explain to mine why they have to look down every street they turn, because of the psychopath stalking us?

Big Dave pauses, looks down, and heaves a heavy sigh. After a moment of thought, he looks up.

Dave:This will be the last time between you two... We can't have any more, Steven. We can't go any farther.

Kurtesy:I only need one more time to finish this.

Big Dave goes around to his office chair, and plops down. He holds his head in his hands, and looks up to Steven, who is already almost out of the office.

Dave:Steven... Steven, why?

Kurtesy pauses, and swallows. He looks over his shoulder, back to Dave.

Kurtesy:Because, if he wants to drag me to Hell... I'm taking him with me.

----



Anderson: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Diabolos!

Diabolos emerges clad with a giant fur coat over him with the crowd not knowing how to react. He gets on all fours on the ramp and scampers down the ramp screaming "I AM THE BEAR!" all over. He tucks and rolls into the ring before rising and roaring. Finally, he takes the coat off and curls up in a corner.

Connor: What the hell?

Cohen: Exactly.



Anderson: And from Sydney Australia, weighing 226 pounds, "The Professor" Steven Kurtesy!

The professor makes his way down to the ring to sea of cheers as he salutes the fans one by one. He enters the ring and poses up on the turnbuckles.

Cohen: It seems Kurtesy gets all the weirdos. Not that he isn't weird himself. I'm just wondering what the hell is up with this Diabolos guy.

Connor: You ever stop and wonder? He sure looks an awful lot like Jimmy Flynn.

Cohen: How?

* Ding Ding Ding *

Steven circles the ring for position, but Diabolos goes down on all fours and swings his arm at Steven. The former World Champion looks completely confused and is then surprised when Diabolos goes for his leg and a takedown. He torques on the ankle and pins the surprised Kurtesy down as Diabolos tries to spin the leg for more leverage. Steven tries to get out of the unorthodox hold, but Diabolos keeps moving around. Steven pulls on the leg to bring the masked man closer and Monkey Flips him to get him off. Dia' gets right back up but Kurtesy grabs him in a Headlock and takes him to the mat.

Connor: The Professor seems focused on match tonight rather than on Dr. Zeus.

Kurtesy gets up while holding Dia' and switches from a standard Headlock to a 3 1/4 one and hits hard knees to the masked man's head. Kurtesy tries a Russian Legsweep but Dia' grabs the ropes to hold off. He shakes off Kurtesy and hits him with a DDT for a cover.

One!

Two!

Thr--

But it doesn't go past two. Dia' goes back for the attack and tries a headlock of his own, trying to squeeze the head of the Professor, but it doesn't work quite as well. Kurtesy gets behind him for a Rear Mat Slam and a cover.

One!

Two!

T--

But Diabolos gets the shoulder up.

Cohen: Winnie The Pooh is putting up a fight. I just hope we don't get an early Dr. Zeus sighting.

Kurtesy tries a waistlock but Diabolos gets to the ropes and holds on to keep Kurtesy from doing anything. Kurtesy lets go but as Dia' goes back on the attack, he is caught in the Repressed Memories and slammed down hard. Kurtesy tries to lock an armbar with it, but Diabolos manages to roll out of the ring and onto the floor.

Connor: What is he doing? He's just scurrying around ringside.

Diabolos crawls around ringside trying to shrug off the slam as Steven tries to go after him. Diabolos gets up and passes by the announce table where he grabs his fur coat and heads back into the ring with Kurtesy following. Back in the ring, Diabolos tries to put the coat on, but Kurtesy grabs it and pulls. But Diabolos jumps over and tangles Kurtesy with it. The ref tries to get it off and as he does, Diabolos sneaks in a low blow. The ref disposes of the coat and Diabolos rolls up Kurtesy with a Small Package.

One!

Two!

Three!

Anderson: Here is your winner, Diabolos!

Connor: What a cheat. What was that?

Cohen:I have no clue. But it worked. And to be honest, that should be what matters. Way to go, weirdo.

The referee raises Diabolos' hand Kurtesy gets back up. As he does, the sounds of a ticking clock can be heard over the P.A. and Kurtesy simply rushes up the ramp. Diabolos in the meantime demands his coat back.

 

[Harthan]

Leon Kensworth is walking around the locker room, looking for the Beard, though a little concerned. He walks around carefully, and almost turns around, thinking better of it. As he turns around, he bumps right into Ezekial Hewitt, who looks as though he's excitedly shaking. He has a large grin on his face, and a wide look in his eyes. Leon brings the microphone to his mouth, but before he can, Ezekial speaks.

Hewitt:Can you see it?

Kensworth looks confused, and pauses.

Kensworth:See... See what?

Hewitt:Apocalypse; it's so close, I can see it. When the four horsemen arrive, and they bring all that will plague the world. Famine, War, Death, they're all coming. But for them to come, you have to start with Conquest... Did you know that, Leon?

Kensworth:No... Um, no, I-

Hewitt:He is coming. And he's the one who summons the rest. Well, you know who's going to lead Conquest out for his victory ride?

Leon puts down his microphone, as the Beard appears from behind him. Leon senses him, and turns around. The Beard looks down at him, almost in disgust. Hewitt jumps in front, and finishes.

Hewitt:The Beard.

----
Anderson: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is for the Elite X Championship!

[YOUTUBE]I9pdaQNwT5k[/YOUTUBE]​

Introducing first, from somewhere up a hill weighing 350 pounds, The Big Bad Bear, Grizzly Bob!

The crowd lauds the challenger with adulation, as the bear growl signals the arrival of the burly mountain man. The green and yellow lights darken over his shadow, as his massive frame comes in sight. He strolls down the aisle, giving roars as he walks to the ring. He slaps the hands of the fans, and makes time for the kids, but seems to lock his eyes to the ring. He flings off his flannel shirt, and climbs the ring apron, beating his chest and letting out a massive roar.

Connor: There seems to be a whole new focus to Grizzly Bob; he looks like a man who knows championship gold is just one victory away.

Cohen: I can only hope that he's learned a thing from Baez, and will learn that these fans mean nothing. He's so busy winning their approval, he doesn't always keep his eyes on the prize.

Connor:The prize tonight is a big one; should Bob win this match, he'll be the owner of the coveted Elite X title, and be seven wins away from a World Title shot.

[YOUTUBE]0NhpvaarTQA[/YOUTUBE]​

Anderson: His opponent, weighing 230 pounds, he is the Mechanical Mecca, and the Elite X Champion, S.H.I.T!

The lights dim and go a very dark, cold shade of blue. When the familiar melody kicks in at about 30 seconds in, S.H.I.T emerges on the top of the ramp, surveying the arena, the noise and then the ring. Slowly it makes its way down to ring, ignoring everything.

Connor: S.H.I.T has been on such a roll, but how long can he keep this pace up?

Cohen: No matter what happens, his roll is going to stop when he runs into Baez, that much I can guarantee.


S.H.I.T walks through the middle rope, and turns to analyze Grizzly Bob. Referee James Aubrey goes to take the Elite X title from S.H.I.T, which he gives, without breaking his analytical stare from Bob. Aubrey holds up the title, and calls for the ring. Bob licks his lips, and returns a glare at S.H.I.T.

Ding, Ding, Ding

Bob takes the fight immediately to S.H.I.T, throwing clubbing blows on the champion. The Mechanical Mecca tries to shake off the blows, but Bob is able to push S.H.I.T right into the corner.

Connor:And already, the Elite X Champion is in trouble!

Cohen:That's the way to take initiative, turn that oversized can opener into scrap!

Bob backs up three steps, and with a little momentum, hits a body avalanche into the corner. S.H.I.T falls to the mat, as Bob makes a quick cover.

1...

Just a one count, as Bob hits the mat.

Cohen:Bob wants to finish this in a hurry!

Connor:He should know how much pain S.H.I.T can absorb; he better know to keep the pressure on.

Bob moves up from his knees, and hits the ropes. He goes for a massive senton splash, but misses. He sits up in pain, as S.H.I.T wraps up Bob's arms in a crucifix position, and rolls him up.

1...

Kick out by Bob, as he gets to his knees. S.H.I.T has made it to his knees, as well. He analyzes Bob some more, scanning for information. He makes it to his feet, as does Bob. They grapple, and S.H.I.T sneaks his head under Bobs' arm, setting him up for a crisp snap suplex. S.H.I.T drives Bob into the mound, and moves his hand to Bob's neck. He applies a nerve hold to the grounded Bob, who slaps the floor with his foot. he screams in pain, as he tries to work his way up from the mat. S.H.I.T applies more pressure, but Bob makes it to his knees, punching the Elite X champion in the stomach. He uses his strength to throw S.H.I.T into the ropes, without even using his hands. S.H.I.T bounces off of the ropes, and is met with a standing flying crossbody! Bob hooks the leg!

1...

2..

No! The mecca kicks out just at two, as Bob grabs his head and picks him up. He hits a knee, right into the gut of the champion, who seems to be taking a lot of damage. While S.H.I.T is bending down, Bob hits a jumping DDT! Bob goes for a cover.

1...

2...

S.H.I.T gets an arm up, right before Aubrey can bring his hand down for three count. S.H.I.T gets up, still holding his head, as he charges towards the ropes. He goes for a vicious lariat, but S.H.I.T ducks, right in time. Bob turns him around, only to find S.H.I.T himself is running at Bob at full speed, and connects with a clothesline! Bob wobbles, arms flailing to keep him up. S.H.I.T bounces off of the ropes again, hits another. Bob still won't go down, so S.H.I.T completes Mechanical Madness, hitting another hard clothesline on Bob. Bob flails his arms to keep him up, but finally falls like a giant redwood, hitting the mat with a hard thud!

Connor:This is what Bob can't allow, letting S.H.I.T get any moment.

Cohen:That damn robot, someone stop him!

S.H.I.T climbs the rope, and signals that he is about to hit Mechanical Mayhem. The crowd cheers, as he flies off the top rope, and flies head first into Bob's shoulder. He misses though, as Bob rolls out of the way! Bob goes for the cover, and drapes an arm over S.H.I.T.

1...

2..

Thr... No, not enough! S.H.I.T barely kicks out, as Bob lays on the ground, completely exhausted.

Connor:Bob is really showing something in this match

Cohen:He's still a moron, but he can definitely go!

Both men stagger to their feet, throwing punches at one another. The crowd is raucous, but are split in their loyalties. S.H.I.T throws a punch, and while some of the crowd cheers, a growing pocket of fans is cheering on for Bob when he throws a punch. Neither man is being booed, but Grizzly Bob is getting the advantage, and the crowd is cheering him on. Finally, he hits an open hand slap to S.H.I.T's chest. Another one, and while S.H.I.T seems to be in pain, he manages to lift his leg high enough to connect with a roundhouse kick to the head. Just like that, the crowd is going wild for S.H.I.T. Bob doesn't go down, though, and instead woozily throws a wild haymaker. S.H.I.T ducks, and Bob's momentum causes him to spin around, as S.H.I.T locks a waistlock. S.H.I.T hits a german suplex, and holds Bob for the pin!

1...

2...

Thr, kick out at the last chance! The crowd roars, as Bob has kicked out of massive suplex. S.H.I.T gets up to one knee, and can only analyze the situation. Bob tries to shake the cobwebs from his head, as S.H.I.T tries to pick him up. Bob fights off with punches, which is met with a European uppercut by S.H.I.T. He tries to hit one more, but Bob ducks, and hugs on to the Bear Hug! He swings S.H.I.T left and right, as S.H.I.T begins to lose consciousness. His limbs become more loose, and his head droops. Bob holds S.H.I.T, and Aubrey checks to see if S.H.I.T gives up. In a complete act of desperation, S.H.I.T lifts his hand, and hits a piston chop, right to the head of Grizzly Bob! It connects, and Bob is stopped, right in his tracks. He lets go of S.H.I.T, and falls to the ground. S.H.I.T lies on top of the body of Grizzly Bob.

1...

2...

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!

S.H.I.T lays on the ground for a while, absolutely limp. Aubrey calls for the bell, and gets the Elite X Title.

Anderson: Here is your winner, and still Elite X Champion.... S.H.I.T!

S.H.I.T is stirring, barely, as Bob is lying on the mat, holding his head in his hands.

Connor:What an amazing performance by both men. S.H.I.T proved the better man, but you have to be impressed by Grizzly Bob's performance.

Cohen:I don't have to do anything. But I have to admit, Bob did a good job softening up the robot for Baez!

S.H.I.T is finally up, and Bob is on his knees, panting heavily and lamenting his loss. He looks up to S.H.I.T, who looks to him. S.H.I.T takes a second to analyze, before offering a firm approval nod to Bob. Bob returns the nod, as S.H.I.T leaves the ring, with the fans cheering wildly for both men.

----
Becky Serra is seen backstage, holding a microphone, looking into the camera.

Serra:My guest at this time, Titus.

Titus walks into the camera, to a roaring approval. He gives a wink into the camera, and a smile.

Serra:Titus, I won't beat around the bush...who is your mystery partner?

Titus:Oh Becky, manners, manners. Just one question, and nothing about me?

Becky smiles, and Titus gives another wink, which elicits a giggle.

Titus:No, Becky, if I knew, trust me, you would probably be the first to know. Besides TMZ, they'd keep hounding me and hounding me. But the truth is, I have no idea who it could. Maybe it's Big Dave; I'm sure he'd like to give Kenneth Banks a little show. Maybe someone that's already here; I know Saboteur is still smarting from what Vega did, but I don't think I could ask for a better tag team partner. Trust me, Saboteur, I know that feeling. Maybe someone thought it'd be cute to bring back The Angel, and team us together again.

The crowd boos this.

Titus:That sounds about right. But the truth is, I don't know who it is... But we're all going to find out together, Becky. And we're all going to find out really, really soon.

Titus leaves, to go prepare, as Becky looks to the camera.

Serra:There you have it folks, even Titus doesn't know! Stay tuned for more Ascension!

 

[Harthan]

Anderson: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!

[YOUTUBE]Fwz7bt1muXc[/YOUTUBE]​

Dr. Zeus comes out to the stage with an angry scowl on his face. As always, Zeus is accompanied by his creepy hospital bed, which he begins to push down the ramp.

Anderson: Introducing first, from Portland, Oregon, weighing 265 pounds, The Good Doctor Zeus...

Connor: It goes without saying that Dr. Zeus is one of the more disturbing characters we have in WZCW, and his recent string of losses can’t be doing much for his generally unpleasant disposition.

Cohen: I wouldn’t say that too loud if I were you, Cat. Zeus looks like he wants to destroy someone tonight.

Dr. Zeus parks his hospital bed at the side of the ring and climbs between the middle and top rope. He walks to a corner where he leans against the top turnbuckle and starts mumbling limericks to himself.

[YOUTUBE]GIijJkojWhE[/YOUTUBE]​

The crowd erupts into a cheer as the conqueror of The Sacrificial Altar, Drake Callahan, enters the arena.

Anderson: And the challenger, from Cleveland, Ohio, weighing 215 pounds, Drake Callahan!

Drake seems to be only modestly appreciative of the warm reception he’s receiving, giving the audience a slight nod before making his way down the ramp.

Connor: Unlike his opponent, things have been going very well for Drake whom, with the help of Los Magnificos Dragones, has finally put an end to The Sacrificial Altar.

Cohen: I can’t say I’m going to miss those religious crazies, but I’m not sure I like what this is doing to Drake’s ego. Clearly he thinks he’s the biggest thing since sliced pastrami!

Drake very calmly enters the ring and ascends the far turnbuckle. He stands for a moment before hopping off the turnbuckle and looking towards his opponent.

The ref calls for the bell and the match is underway.

Zeus slowly rises from his corner and meets Drake in the middle of the ring. The two stare down each other for a while before entering a collar and elbow tie-up. The two jockey for position for a few moments, but Drake breaks free and slaps Zeus across the face. The crowd jeers at Zeus for being the victim of such a humiliating attack, but Zeus can do little to repay the favor as Drake continues his attack with an elbow to the face and a knee to the gut. Drake finishes the attack by shoving Zeus back into a corner and pummeling him with knee strikes. Zeus, though weakened, has the wherewithal to duck under the top rope and leave half his body out of the ring, forcing the ref to pull Drake back. Drake takes a few steps back, but as Zeus slithers back into the ring, Callahan charges at the Good Doctor… but Dr. Zeus rolls away and Drake hits the turnbuckles. He clutches his chest off the rebound, but is quickly taken down with a clothesline from Zeus. The doctor covers Drake for the pin.

ONE!

Kick out!

Drake gets his shoulder up in time, but Zeus quickly scrambles to his feet and drops a leg across Drake’s chest. He rolls over for another pin.

ONE!

TWO!

Kick out!

Drake is more forceful with this kick out, throwing Zeus off of his body and climbing to his feet. Zeus, figuring he still has the advantage, throws an elbow at Drake’s face, but Drake blocks the attack and hits Zeus with a European uppercut, sending Zeus to the ropes. Drake charges at Zeus and connects with a clothesline that brings both men crashing to the mat outside of the ring!

Connor: It looked like Drake might have had Zeus staggered after an early advantage, but you have to wonder what he was thinking with that risky move.

Cohen: Callahan is cocky. He thinks he’s untouchable now that he beat TSA, and it’s causing him to make some costly mistakes in the ring.

Callahan is the first to his feet on the outside of the ring as the ref starts to count the men out. Drake walks over to the nearby Dr. Zeus and whips him into the security barrier. Zeus hits the barrier hard, but is able to fend off Drake with a quick jab to the jaw. Zeus grabs Drake by the head and attempts to gain a dominant position, but Drake quickly breaks loose and delivers a headbutt that grounds Zeus. Without missing a beat, Drake leaps in the air slams down on Zeus with a standing shooting star press. Drake turns his attention back to the ring where the ref’s count has now reached six. Drake takes one last look at Zeus, who is just barely stirring, and then hops back in the ring.

Connor: A quick back and forth on the outside of the ring was won by Drake, but did he do enough to keep Zeus down for the count out win?

By the time the ref reaches eight, Dr. Zeus has clumsily gotten back to his feet. He staggers back towards the ring, but bumps into his hospital bed, prompting the audience to laugh at him. Zeus sneers at the audience and climbs over the bed and back into the ring before the ref can hit ten. Drake charges at Zeus and attempts to hit a big boot, but Zeus side-steps the attack and slaps his palm in Drake’s face. Drake pulls back clutching his eyes and screaming, seemingly blind.

Cohen: I didn’t see an eye poke or anything illegal from that exchange. Drake is faking it!

A blinded Drake swings wildly at Zeus, but his attack misses the doctor by a mile. Zeus uses Drake’s blindness to his advantage and sneaks behind Callahan to lock on Euthanasia. Drake drops to his knees and howls in pain. The ref asks him if he wants to give up, but Drake says no. He gets one foot planted in the ground and starts to push up, but Zeus kicks Drake in the back of the knee and sends him back to the mat. With Zeus relentlessly applying the death grip and nowhere to go, Drake is forced to tap.

Anderson: The winner of this match by submission… Dr. Zeus!

Cohen: Well, I can’t say I’m happy to see Dr. Zeus win, but at least this will wipe that smug smile off of Drake’s face.

Connor: A very puzzling end to a match that really just seemed to be getting into the swing of things. I wonder what Zeus did to Drake’s eyes?

Cohen: Nothing! Drake is faking it! He knew the only way he’d beat Dr. Zeus is by finding the easy way out. He couldn’t do it by count-out, so he tried to do it by disqualification instead!

As Zeus rolls his hospital bed up the ramp, Drake is being attended to by medical personnel whom are inspecting his eyes.

[YOUTUBE]Niz42qlPDcA[/YOUTUBE]​

Zeus’ eyes grow wide as Steven Kurtesy makes his way to the top of the stage, and he has brought a crib with him. Zeus seems puzzled by this, but his look of confusion turns to one of horror as Kurtesy pulls a sledgehammer out from inside the crib and begins smashing the wooden crib to smithereens.

Cohen: Now what the heck is this sideshow?

Connor: It looks like Kurtesy is showing Dr. Zeus that he’s not the only one can play mind games!

Kurtesy finishes smashing the crib and turns his attention to Zeus. He points the sledgehammer at his rival and nods his head. A look of panic crosses Zeus’ face as Kurtesy turns around and walks calmly to the back.

 

[Harthan]

[YOUTUBE]9a3oHeTM0Gw[/YOUTUBE]​

Anderson: Introducing first, at a combined weight of 400 pounds, they are the WZCW Tag Team Champions, Magnitúdinis!

As the violin begins to sound, the lights are extinguished bar one lone spotlight. It beams down at the top of the ramp and the “King” and “Queen” enter to unanimous hatred. They survey their audience and Steven Holmes chuckles. Celeste is cold, unmoved. She extends her arm and hand out to her lover. He takes it and turns to face her. He pulls her in and they kiss passionately. After breaking the lip lock, Holmes smirks and they separate, still linking arms though. They saunter down the ramp before coming to the apron where Holmes helps his beau ascend the steel steps. She in turn holds the ropes open for her man who wipes his feet before entering the ring. He does not return the favour and Celeste enters over the top rope. They make their way to the centre of the ring where Holmes stands in the spotlight, holding his arm up high, holding one finger upwards while Celeste does the same. They are holding hands with their spare limb. Then, the lights come back on in full.

Connor: The tag team champions enter this match without any idea who one of their opponents is, and that will definitely put them at a disadvantage tonight.

Cohen: A completely unfair disadvantage! I'm sick and tired of seeing Titus get all the easy paths to glory in this company.

[YOUTUBE]_8cMpFGuyHQ[/YOUTUBE]​

Anderson: And introducing their opponents, first, from Keystone City, Kansas, weighing 225 pounds, This is........Titus!

The boos quickly turn to cheers as Titus makes a heroic entrance bursting into the arena. This is the extent of Titus’ showmanship as he sets his sights on the ring and makes his way towards it with a rather serious look upon his face.

Connor: It's worth noting, of course, that by all accounts Titus doesn't know who his partner is either, putting only our mystery man at a true advantage here.

Cohen: If you believe that, I've got a bridge in Brooklyn to sell you. Titus keeps getting things handed to him in this company time and time again, including a mystery partner of his choosing.

Anderson: And his partner...

Spoiler

[YOUTUBE]YjKI_jnnEho[/YOUTUBE]​

Anderson:...from Winnipeg, Canada, weighing in at 219 pounds, "Showtime" David Cougar!

Showtime runs out to the stage with his arms held high over his head, motioning the crowd to get pumped up, looking energetic and ready to fight as he does so. He stops at the top of the ramp, knowing full well that the camera is panning over him and giving everyone an image for the ages as he gives the camera a wink. He makes no secret of grinning ear to ear as he soaks in his moment, the crowd cheering for him with abandon, before he makes his way to the ring, slapping hands across the left aisle on his way down.

Cohen: No! This is impossible! He's gone, he's retired, he can't be back already!

Connor: It appears news of Showtime's demise has been greatly exaggerated! Welcome back to the ring the former world champion!

Titus is practically in disbelief as Showtime enters the ring. Holmes and Celeste look at each other with grave faces, both of them recognizing the dire implications of an old enemy's return. Showtime is still grinning as he shakes Titus's hand and his old friend laughs and pats him on the back. The two look across the ring with eager eyes, ready to get the match underway.

Referee Jorou Akiyama nods at Showtime in a rare sign of respect from the veteran official before returning to business, separating both teams into their respective corners. Titus looks at Showtime and gestures toward the ring, but Showtime shakes his head and exits. Titus nods and waits in the ring opposite Celeste Crimson. Akiyama signals for the bell and we are underway. The two circle each other for a moment before Celeste darts in with a vicious kick to Titus's gut. Titus doubles over and Celeste tries to wrench his neck, but Titus holds onto her and forces her into the ropes. Titus pushes her off the ropes and sends her running, Celeste rebounds, Titus ducks for a back body drop, Celeste sees it and counters with an Evenflow DDT! Celeste hits the ropes again, rebounds, Titus rolls under her, Celeste hits the ropes and rebounds again, Titus gets to his feet and counters with a European uppercut! Titus pumps his fist to the delight of the crowd before taking out Celeste with a swinging neckbreaker! Celeste rolls across the ring and just out of Titus's grasp as she tags in Holmes. Holmes gets into the ring and eyes Titus, though he also looks warily at Showtime. Showtime calls for a tag and Titus backs up and obliges to the delight of the crowd as Showtime re-enters the ring against his one time mortal enemy.

Connor: Showtime is back in a WZCW ring and he is staring down the man who beat him for the world championship once, on the night he formed the unholy alliance that has now captured the tag team championship.

Cohen: An unholy alliance? Come on, Cat, it's true love! What's so hard about that to understand?


Showtime and Holmes stare each other down for a long moment before flying at each other and exchanging a flurry of blows. Holmes gets the better of it and Showtime stumbles to a knee and Holmes pulls Showtime up and steps behind him before nailing a neckbreaker. He goes for a cover and gets one, two, but only two as Showtime kicks out. Holmes looks frustrated as he pulls Showtime up yet again, then hits the ropes, rebounds, and takes him down with a facebuster. Holmes pulls Showtime up and locks in an abdominal stretch. Holmes wrenches it, but Showtime wriggles out of it, slips behind Holmes and takes him out with a reverse neck breaker! Showtime grabs Holmes's legs - and LOCKS IN THE COMMERCIAL BREAK! HE WRENCHES IT WITH FURY AND HOLMES SCREAMS IN PAIN! HOLMES CLUTCHES AT HIS ABDOMEN AND HOWLS BEFORE HE TAPS! HE TAPS!

Anderson: Here is your winner, the team of Titus and Showtime!

Showtime wrenches the hold even more and Akiyama has to pull him off. Titus steps into the ring and hugs his partner as Holmes continues to clutch at his abdomen. Celeste is in to check on him and she calls for a medic.

Connor: Holmes looks like he's in serious pain and he may have torn something on that hold from Showtime.

Cohen: Did you see how long he kept it in after the bell? That should be a disqualification!

Between Celeste, Akiyama, and a small group of medics Holmes is able to stumble out of the arena, never looking back at his foes as a result of the severe amount of pain he's in. Showtime and Titus look on as they share a laugh. Titus motions for a microphone and slicks back his hair to speak.

Titus: Everybody, I have to tell you, I had no idea I could expect Showtime out here tonight to be my partner -

Titus is unable to continue as a roar comes up from the crowd at Showtime's name.

Titus: - but let me tell you, I couldn't be happier. Showtime, I'm so happy that you're back in this ring and that you did it with me. I've been through a lot lately - I've been trying to get back on top, and I realized, you know what? I've never been the tag team champion. I've never even tried. And here we are, Showtime, two of the best in the business and we just pinned the champions. I think that earns us a title match, wouldn't you say?

Showtime nods and the two men embrace. The crowd goes wild and they raise hands together, apparently as WZCW's newest tag team!

Connor: I'm nearly at a loss for words! Showtime is back, and he and Titus are a new team! WZCW's own mega powers could be on the fast track to a championship bid with a huge win over the champions tonight.

Cohen: Two great wrestlers don’t necessarily make a great team. Egos will collide, Cat.

Showtime takes the mic from Titus and he raises it to speak. The crowd barely lets him as they go wild. Eventually they settle and Showtime begins.

Showtime: It's so good to be back after a little R&R, everybody. And Titus, I just have one thing to say.

Showtime grins from ear to ear and he takes a deep breath...

Spoiler

...but his grin fades and turns into a grimace, and HE NAILS TITUS IN THE HEAD WITH THE MIC!

Connor: What the hell?!

Titus stumbles back into the ropes, holding his forehead. Showtime's face remains twisted in a grimace as he goes to Titus and delivers the Ratings Crash! The crowd is in disbelief as they watch Showtime drag Titus into the corner, lift him onto the top turnbuckle - AND NAIL A FINAL ACT!

Cohen: Showtime has betrayed his best friend! I love it!

Connor: How can you love this, Jack? Are you kidding me?

Cohen: This is what I missed from Showtime! A little edge, a little grit! This is the real Showtime!

The crowd starts to boo profusely as they realize what Showtime's done. Showtime looks out around the crowd as he pushes the hair out of his eyes and his face returns to impassivity. He stares back at Titus for a long moment before he lifts his head up, pushes his hair back, and slowly leaves the ring.

Showtime hops down off the apron and walks up the ramp, unfazed by the crowd reaction.

Connor: I just don't understand. Showtime is one of Titus's good friends, why would he do something like this?

Showtime stops on the ramp and stares up at the titantron. A medic is inside the ring helping Titus, who has rolled over. Showtime turns back towards the ring and slowly walks back. He slides inside and walks over to the medic and throws him out of the ring! Showtime lifts Titus up and pushes him into the turnbuckle. Showtime lifts him up to the top rope and climbs up top with him. Both men stand on the top rope as Showtime readies himself to hit his finisher again. The medic stands on the outside and shouts at Showtime not to do it. The crowd boos furiously as Showtime flips backwards, taking Titus with him for ANOTHER DEVASTATING FINAL ACT! The two men hit the mat and Showtime rolls to his feet as stares at Titus. He reaches down and grabs the fallen microphone.

Showtime: I didn't finish my sentence. Titus, I have just one thing to say to you.

He pauses for a moment.

Showtime: F--- you.

The crowd gasps in shock and returns to booing Showtime with even greater fury as a team of medics and security hit the ring and force Showtime away. Showtime backs up and watches them look over Titus as he slowly leaves the ring. The crowd boos him heavily as he walks up the ramp, not staring at the titantron as the EMTs tend to Titus.

Connor: I'm at a loss for words to describe what I just saw. Why, Showtime?

 

[Harthan]

Credits:

Harthan - Titus/??? vs. Magnitudinis
JGlass - Dr. Zeus vs. Drake Callahan
Haiku - Grizzly Bob vs. SHIT, Segments
Killjoy - Steven Kurtesy vs. Diabolos
Yaz - The Beard vs. James Howard

Thanks for reading guys. We unfortunately say goodbye to Funkay and Steven Holmes for the time being with this show. Thanks for everything Funkay.

Stay tuned for more WZCW tomorrow (today?) on Aftershock!