AS16: Heavy Artillery vs. Pride of Toyota - Tag Team No. 1 Contender

[Phoenix]

Despite getting the better of The Ghetto Stars through single matches, Heavy Artillery have still got to prove themselves as Number One Contenders when they take on Pride of Toyota, a team who impressed in their debut as a team. Who will go to Apocalyse and look to gain some gold around their waists?

Deadline is Tuesday 8th June 2010, 23:59EST

 

[Super Crazy]

The scene opens up to a repair shop where Jordan and Max are conversing outside of the shop sitting on the steps of the establishment.

Jordan : I told you to get rid of that damn thing a few months ago, but you just don't listen do you?

Jordan shoves Max slightly in a joking manner, and Max rolls off the steps, caught off guard by the shove. He gets up and brushes himself off.

Max : I told you to get rid of your motorcycle, but you just don't listen do you?

Jordan : I've had that bike almost my entire life, there's no way I'm getting rid of that.

Max : Well I'm not getting rid of -----

Max is cut off by the repair man.

Repair Man : - Your van ---

Max keeps talking.

Max : Yes, I am not getting rid of my van!!

The man taps Max on the shoulder and dangles the keys in front of him.

Repair Man : No sir, your van, it's ready to go. I also noticed the motorcycle in the back, I've polished it up a bit and did a few minor repairs to that too. No charge for that though.

Jordan grins from ear to ear and he hits Max in the shoulder.

Jordan : See you wanted me to get rid of that bike? I'm telling you I'll never get rid of it. Thanks a lot man.

Jordan shakes the repair man's hand as Max looks confused.

Max : Free of charge? Awesome. Guess we'll be on our way then. Thanks.

The repair man stops him and hands him the bill.

Repair Man : No, the bike was free, your van however, that's another story.

Max : Well luckily, I've got my credit card here.

Max and the repair man walk off as Max pays the bill. Both men hop in the van and take off onto another long stretch of highway as the scene fades out.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

The scene picks back up as they are driving down the road. Max looks over at Jordan who is sleeping and wakes him up.

Max : Hey! Hey Jordan! Wake the hell up!!

Max lightly shoves Jordan and he wakes up instantly.

Jordan : What the hell man! I was sleeping.

Max : It's your turn to drive, I've been driving for hours now. I'm going to climb in back.

Jordan takes the wheel as Max climbs over into the backseat and Jordan shifts over. Max picks up his guitar and starts to play a tune, and slowly adds the words into it.

Max : This week we are facing the Pride of Toyota
Last week they were impressive boy don't you know-ah

This week we have to earn a shot at the titles
We're facing a man whose waves could be tidal.

Let's not forget, his tag team partner, a man from the wild
They are rookies and we are now vets, so this is their trial.

If they can beat us, then surely they'll become the champs
But if we shall win, I'll buy those new 10,000 watt amps.

My partner and I work extremely well as a team,
But so does the Pride even though they are green.

So come on now Jordan, let's give them a fight,
We need to stand tall at the end of the night.

Last of all, the champs need to beware of Heavy Artillery,
Because after the Pride, it's the Stars, and we'll be champs yet again.

Max strums his guitar a few more times before closing out and getting ready to take a nap.

Jordan : Hey man, that was awesome. Do you mind if we stop for a bite to eat soon?

Max : That's fine, we've been on the road for quite some time since that repair shop anyway. I was just tired of driving.

The scene fades out again as the van continues on down the road.

 

[Super Crazy]

The scene opens up to a diner. The camera scans the crowd and shows all kinds of different people and finally we see Jordan Lights and Max Karzai sitting there. Max is drumming with his utencils as they appear to be waiting. Suddenly a waitress comes to their table with some food.

Waitress : Here's your food sir, I believe you had the burger and fries, and you had the tuna melt with a side salad.

She places the plates in front of each of them as they both begin to eat.

Jordan : I'm surprised you didn't want to go to Taco Bell this time.

Max gives a disappointed look to Jordan and hits the table with his fist.

Max : I did want to go there, you're the one that brought us here.

Jordan : You didn't seem to disagree.

Max throws his burger down on the plate as all of the condiments splatter all over his face and t shirt.

Max : Damnit. I'll be back, I going to try to clean all this off of me.

Max goes out to the van and grabs a change of shirt and uses the dirty one to wipe his face off and says something to himself out loud.

Max : How am I going to tell him?

Max comes back in and sits back down.

Max : There I'm better now. So, as you know we're facing the Pride of Toyota this week. What do you think of them?

Jordan slides his plate aside as he's finished his food.

Jordan : Well to be quite honest, I think they are extremely good. That Kravinoff guy, he's been around before hasn't he?

Max : Yeah, he had a match or two, then he left, his primal instinct must have called him back to the forest or something, hahahaha.

Jordan : Well hopefully he doesn't run off on Toyota, not that Toyota really needs him, I mean look the size of him, he could probably crush us. They're tough opponents. They took the Crash-Klinic to the limit in an attempt to make a name for themselves and they did just that. If they beat us, they are going to beat The Ghetto Stars for sure. Somehow those two work together extremely well with their different styles. You know, oil and water never mix, but for them it works extremely well. I'd say I'm nervous but I'm not. I know we're hungry. We're anxious to get into the ring and earn a shot.

Max starts to eat his food again now and washes it down with some soda.

Max : I'm thinking we have a good chance of winning the match this week, you really want those championships back don't you?

Jordan : Yeah man, I really do. I honestly think if we win this ma---, wait a sec, you said you really want those championships, not we really want those championships. Something going on here you're not telling me about?

Max : Well, since you ask, I've got to tell you, man I've been really worn out lately, going back and forth between music and wrestling is really tearing me down. I need to gain my focus back, so I want to take a break.

Jordan gets a frustrated look on his face and takes a drink of his water.

Jordan : You want to leave right on the heels of possibly title opportunity?

Max : I realize this is bad timing, but man, look at it like this, if we win the match against Pride of Toyota we'll go out on a highnote. No, when we win we'll go out on a high note. Look, we'll win the match, and then I'll announce that I want to focus on my music. I'm going on a tour , on the road, with one career for now. I'm not quitting WZCW, just taking a break. I need to refocus and reorganize. Plus before I come back, I'm going to train and become better. I'll come back better then ever.

Jordan takes out his wallet leaves his money on the table for the meals and walks outside, almost as if he ignored everything Max just told him. He sits on the steps of the diner as Max comes up next to him.

Jordan : You know, when I came here, I had nothing, I had no one. You are like a brother to me man, and if you want to focus on your music, then I understand. The way I see it, we are about to go out in a blaze of glory. Heavy Artillery needs to bring out the big guns in our match. One final match for us, and if the Pride of Toyota wants to beat us, then we'll give them one hell of a match.

Max pats Jordan on the back.

Max : That's the Jordan I know. Come on now man, if we're going to win, I need to be in tip top shape, you know what that means don't you?

Jordan rolls his eyes ans both men begin to enter the van.

Jordan : Taco Bell and lots of energy drinks, thank God I won't have to deal with that anymore.

Max : You know you love it.

The scene fades out as the notorious van of Max Karzai scrambles onto the road and heads for the highway.

 

[Coco]

Chicago, IL

On a sunny Friday morning in the Windy City, Leon Kensworth, microphone in hand, is briskly walking up to the front doors of the Andrew Jackson Language Academy, a local elementary school. Upon entering, he weaves his way through the empty hallways for a few seconds before finding Hunter Kravinoff waiting for him in front of a set of double doors. As though being the only man in the hall didn’t make him stand out enough, Kravinoff is wearing a leopard print sport coat over his skin tight black tee. A look of pure glee is on the face of Kravinoff, who’s rubbing his palms together as he watches Kensworth approach.

Leon: Wow, you’re looking happy this morning.

Kravinoff giggles a little bit while holding a gaze at Kensworth; it’s a deep, almost unsettling, masculine giggle.

Hunter: Why wouldn’t I be, Leon? I’m in my first significant relationship with a larger than life hunting partner who understands me. He can grasp the fire that burns inside of me like nobody has before. Even the loving apes who took me in as a young man, compassionate as they were towards me, couldn’t grasp who Hunter Kravinoff is quite like Wasabi Toyota can. This is uncharted territory.

Hunter stops to take a few deep breaths while resting his hand on his heart.

It’s beating so fast...

He looks warmly at Leon.

Would you like to feel it?

Leon looks slightly phased by this comment but presses on shaking his head slightly.

Leon: No... No thank-you... So, where's Toyota?

Kravinoff gestures broadly to the double doors next to him.

Hunter: He’s in there. Chicago’s favourite son is giving a motivational speech to the student body. What a thrilling, sophisticated education process you civilized people have!

Kensworth looks at the door while half-heartedly responding to Kravinoff.

Leon: Yeah, it sure is something... Would you mind me having a look inside?

Hunter: Sure. Why not?

Kensworth opens the door and the camera peaks inside, catching a glimpse of Wasabi Toyota, sporting a large, wild Hawaiian shirt and a pair of beige khakis. He’s pacing at the front of the auditorium with a microphone in hand, his free hand resting comfortably in his pant pocket.

Wasabi: I knew what I was in for. I’d seen many a dissenter get the tire feeding treatment in my time. For the longest time, it was our greatest weapon. It was unexpected to the uninitiated. It was the peak in abnormal punishment. Upon receiving the treatment myself, I found out why it’s abnormal. You see, the digestive system and automobile tires...

Toyota looks directly at a young child, no older than twelve, seated in the front row.

DO. NOT. MIX.

Kensworth closes the door and shoots the camera a look of understanding and a nod of agreement with Toyota before turning back to Kravinoff.

Hunter: Absolutely riveting, isn’t it? The man’s experiences have developed such humanity in him. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. And yet... he’s such a specimen that his humanity doesn’t make him weak. No matter his mindset, he’s a majestic beast in combat, a destructive force almost elemental in nature. He’s the perfect partner for me. The greatest, most practiced, well-tuned killer in the world aligned with the most effortlessly powerful cognisant being on the planet: Can you think of any greater alliance?

Leon: When you put it that way, no. I can’t. But seeing how you two performed together last week, I get the feeling that someone on that team isn’t exactly living up to their end of the bargain...

Kravinoff lets out a loud bellowing laugh before responding with a smile on his face.

Hunter: Oh, Leon. You aren’t going to bring me down today! Especially with notions like that which so how far out of the loop you are!

Kensworth looks to the camera and is slightly bewildered. He refocuses his gaze on Kravinoff.

Leon: Out of the loop? I’m just calling it like I see it, buddy. You got destroyed last week. You’re lucky Toyota was there to save your hide!

Kravinoff laughs once again.

Hunter: Can’t you see it, Leon?

Leon: (with a high voice) See what?!

Hunter: Everything that happened last week was by design on my part. I’m a hunter. I know how to use bait. I know how to draw an adversary out to the point where they’re prime for the kill. I took their best shots last week and exhausted Crashin and Kurtesy so that Toyota could bring them justice in an impressive fashion.

Kravinoff keeps gleefully laughing away while Leon just stares sceptically at the man in front of him.

Leon: Do you expect anyone to believe that?

Hunter: Can you prove that it’s not the case?

Leon: Well...

Hunter: Then that’s that. You’re out of the loop.

Leon: Oh, come on! You’re taking advantage of this young man! There’s no way you could have taken even one of those men if Toyota hadn’t been there to save your hide last week!

Hunter: Stop being such a mark, Kensworth. This is how real combatants go about their business.

Kravinoff has a wide grin as Kensworth looks like a deer in the headlights.

You don’t have to get too worked up about this, Leon. I appreciate what he did last week. I appreciate what he’s done for me outside of combat as well. For example, last week he introduced me to a delicacy called pizza.

Leon: Pizza’s not exactly a delicacy.

Hunter: It is where I come from. Do you have any idea how long it would take to gather all of those ingredients and produce others? Do you have any idea how much of one’s resources it would take to preserve certain ingredients while hunting others? It’s impractical where I come from.

Kensworth has a sceptical look on his face while Kravinoff looks calm and considerate, almost as though he wants Leon to appreciate the circumstances of his existence.

Leon: How was your first experience with pizza? Did you enjoy it?

Kravinoff: It’s not without its charms, but it relies too heavily on one being served in some way for me to ever see it as something you can sustain life with. I may have it another couple more times, but I don’t see myself becoming a “pizza-fiend.”

An awkward silence ensues.

He plans to take me to something called a supermarket so we can get some supplies for our celebration once we become the number one contenders.

Leon: Yeah, about that, your opponenters are –-

Kensworth is interrupted by the sound of cheering from the auditorium. He opens the door and the camera peaks inside to see Toyota, squatting while he’s pacing, one hand in the air, speaking dramatically while the children react with glee.

Wasabi: The other Yakuza banged the door and begged for help! But nobody heard him scream! Because when you’re evil, you don’t have people who care about you! So there was nobody to help him when I rolled over on him!

Cheering continues as Kensworth closes the door and turns to Kravinoff.

Leon: Sorry about that.

Hunter: No problem. You were about to bring up Heavy Artillery?

Leon: Yeah, I was –-

Kravinoff raises his open palm, stopping Kensworth abruptly.

--- Let me stop you right there. I have no occasion to discuss men like Max Karzai. He’s a non-factor to me. A man of music, flash, and frivolity. He’s a stunt man who takes senseless risks for his fans rather than calculated risks for his survival. As much as I’ve enjoyed the glimpse of humanity that Toyota has given me, there’s nothing more upsetting to me than the part of humanity that that peon Karzai represents. He’s not worthy competition for me and frothy do-nothing, non-entities like him aren’t the reason I came to WZCW. I’ve proven time after time in the jungle to be a superior breed of warrior than Karzai could ever dream of becoming. If Karzai likes risks, then he’s going to love facing me because he’s never taken a bigger risk than standing in front of me while I’m on the war path.

Leon: What about Lights? How do you feel about him?

Hunter: Lights means slightly more to me than Karzai but barely enough to deserve recognition. He’s a neighborhood tough guy. While he might fancy himself to be “hard,” he’s not exactly a world traveled veteran like I am and he’s not brought justice to societal institutions like my tag team partner has.

Leon: As eloquently spoken as ever, Jungle Boy.

Kravinoff throws Kensworth a deathly serious stare as Kensworth merely gazes sarcastically.

Hunter: You’ll see soon enough. You see, Mr. Kensworth, when I’m WZCW Tag Team Champion, I won’t have to look for opportunities to prove I’m the baddest animal on this plain. The prey, naively seeking opportunity and glory, will be foolish enough to seek me out and put themselves in the line of fire. As each one receives their comeuppance at the hands of The Pride, you’ll be left with little doubt as to the validity of Hunter Kravinoff and what he tells you about himself.

The bell rings as children begin flooding the hallways and coming from the double doors where the interview is being conducted. Kravinoff speaks up so Leon can hear him.

Hunter: Well, looks like I’m done here. Class is adjourned.

Kravinoff fights his way through the crowd and into the auditorium as Kensworth looks at the camera and rolls his eyes.

Leon: What a nut...

 

[Coco]

Wasabi Toyota can be seen walking out of the Andrew Jackson Language Academy. He has tears running down his cheeks but his face is filled with joy. A puzzled Hunter Kravinoff stares at him for a moment.

Hunter: What are you doing? You have just triumphed greatly, yet you are showing weakness. Hurry, hide your face! You can't be seen in this condition.

Wasabi: Relax, man. It's ok to cry. It's human. These aren't tears of weakness anyway, these are tears of joy. I was able to talk about my past and help others. Thousands upon thousands of children. A few years ago I was kidnapping kids like those in the middle of the night and sending them on steamboats down the Chicago River. I'm no longer part of the problem. I'm the solution. You understand, right Kravinoff?

Kravinoff simply continues to stare, partly out of confusion and partly out of admiration.

Come on, let's go get some food, brother

Toyota climbs into the rear of Kravinoff's dark red Chevrolet Astro cargo van as Hunter gets in the driver's seat and fires her up.

---------------------------------------------------------------

As both men exit the car, Toyota walks comfortably through the parking lot of a local Food Lion while Kravinoff follows behind apprehensively. Toyota gives the greeter at the door a reassuring smile, while Kravinoff is not able to do anything by stare hungrily at he raw, human flesh in front of him.

Hunter: So, what exactly is this place? Doesn't seem to be viable for hunting at all.

Wasabi: Why would we have to hunt? We're just here to pick up some goodies for our party after Ascension this week.

Hunter wanders off towards the deli counter, where a young couple is in the process of buying a sizeable portion of salami. They become aware of Hunter's presence and take a step backwards.

Hunter: What is this Toyota? They're simply giving these people meat?!?! Meat is something you fight for, something you earn. It's not something that is just handed out.

Wasabi: Relax, buddy. That's how things work here. You pay money and you get what you want. We let other people do the hunting for us. It's pretty cool, actually, and very humane. Listen, I'll stay here and get what we need from the deli while you go take care of the rest of the list.

Toyota hands Kravinoff the list, which reads as follows:

34 Boxes of White Rice

5 2-Liter Bottles of Orange Soda

Kravinoff walks off to complete a hunt unlike he's ever experienced before, while Toyota steps up to the counter to order.

Ya, I'll take 10 pounds of everything you've got. We're gonna be a couple of hungry boys after becoming #1 Contender's.

As Toyota pretends to be texting while patiently awaiting his rather large order, the young couple begin whispering and appear to be pointing at him. After a moment, the young man approaches excitedly.

Young Man: Hey aren't you Wasabi Toyota? You're one of my favorites, man! I'm a big fan of your work.

Wasabi: That's great. Always good to hear I'm making a difference. It's what feeds me to keep going.

Young Man: Ya, dude, the way you beat up Crash-Klinic last week, that was awesome! You were like "BAM, BOOM, BOOM, BAM!" and they were like "O, Sh*t! It's Wasabi Toyota. We're screwed!" and then you were like "I'm going to beat you guys to get in a #1 Contender's match, fool!" You kicked some serious ass, man! Watching you pound people is awesome!

Wasabi: It is, but remember young man, it isn't the violence I live for. Sure, it's necessary at times, but it's all for the greater good. It's for a world without peace. You understand that, right? In my heart, I despise violence. I only crave peace and serenity.

Young Man: You're still going to pound on Heavy Artillery this week though, right? Those guys used to be cool before, but now they're all mushy and boring. You have to crush them!

Wasabi: Yes, I can't shy away from the violence just yet. I still have a mission to complete. Karzai and Lights are good people, more or less, but they are both extremely flawed. Even the best people can become flawed, and therefore very dangerous. Karzai, for instance. He has a good heart, but can't control his emotions properly. Throwing things and destroying others' property after a loss? Unacceptable. He needs to calm down before he does damage to himself and others. Trust me, I've been through it, it's not pretty.

Lights, as well, has some issues. Alcohol is never the answer to your problems. Many good men were forced to join the Yazuka after making one too many mistakes whilst drunk, and their lives were completely ruined. Just like last week, I must continue to beat these flaws out of my opponents as hard as I possibly can. If I continue at this pace of two a week, I'll be able to help set all of the 'Z straight before the end of the year. And later, the world.

That's where the titles come into play. By winning just two simple matches, Kravinoff and I will be able to achieve them. As a champion, I'll be in the spotlight. Millions around the world will know my name and my message. Perhaps they'll begin to follow it and pass it along to their crack addicted mother or their abusive uncle or one of the gang members that lives next door. That is why the titles are so important to me, to everyone. I need them so I can make an even bigger difference. So I can truly be a part of something positive.

The young man is smiling with an unchanging blank expression on his face during Toyota's whole spiel.

Young Man: Ya, that's cool. Will you sign my nipple?

Wasabi: Ummm, sure.

Toyota quickly signs the young man's areola before the couple quickly runs off, the young man's female companion obviously embarrassed. At this moment, Toyota picks up his order from the deli, which is in an enormous box, while Kravinoff returns with a basket full of rice in one hand and orange soda in the other.

Hunter: This place is incredible. Strange, but incredible. So much available, so easily. After some adaption, I may be able to actually enjoy this stuff. Any place that sells frosted tiger flakes has potential in my book.

Wasabi: I'm sure you will enjoy it, especially after we built Heavy Artillery on Ascension. Trust me Kravinoff, the Pride of Toyota can't be stopped.